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Gerald Kersh ‘you come to think of that, and remember all the curious Monster they used so cai in Bartblomen’s Fas doing the eighteenth cnnory—ben yo tink of al che Messi Monsters and Mermen thar ey picked out of the tea and showed on airgoonds unl they ded, it mukes you dike “Tras you think ‘Do you aber bythe way’ sid the Colool potting to the Reverend ity’ pamphlet. "hat poor litle ato was si wrth romning sores and that his teeth were fling ou? Hentay poring here pine Pot St Sen you wonder why he got deyperste and simply chucked himelf ack it che fea snk or swim Put youre inks postion You go to sleepin Hiroshima, in August 1945 and hea —Whoof? you fied yours in Brighton in 1745, No ‘wonder the poor wrth could pet. Tie sock would be eough o panty anyon’ tongue [sear me, Kersh, my boys putsa match sins of thought ofthe mor dishing tare, Iker me remember that Past nd Future al one Tal elly worry in fur when Thave nightmare.» one of chose nightmares in which you find youself lon, suck dum, completly bewildered in place you've never sen before place ou ofthis word. God have mercy on wish they Sacre thought of tisgusting Secret Weapon! You are fre to argue the point, to speculate and to draw your own conclisions, But this i the end (or, God forbid, the beginning) of the story ofthe Brighton Monster | | Let’s go to Golgotha! GARRY KILWORTH. the Time:Travel Agency was the third room along one o the brasches of + Banyan building. Hewas along way Up, ha took Simon Fala considerable sme to seach the pink gas doors, A notice ouside rd, (Paw pneeace rouns Thisis your chance o 360 | ‘ean ornate rE ne we MSR Seo snort [TRaSOLTEDT NO PERSONAL RIK simon stared into the interior and then went eat i ron Sle An assent deny wos sie te moment Hee eRe com: with hands clped before him in deference a ee atomee, Perhaps he was equerting id fom above ‘Bougd Simon to get ha chzogh hs poset le? “Can help yo? ange un igs bin is back ot she At in gel hate was not yet ready buy ese aren ple Ca ese some 837 Wh covtnstny lee? oe Gary Kitwor ari emer ree teat a tine soe eat ded oi schicken pn ag Wow saga edger ad sate epee MO Eafe set gh re ton ay way ‘evolution of Mars has only a limited aumber of seats available, * st ber of “hh —— eta Fay a eng Canta ni wig ee ei faa Wenig Museau ot fore gucteses Oe HOw | Soe eee Ce eee sae ends ease eo Te Sion muir issn on nat ns cheney hn iat ena etter ck eves centages ganesh tel eon fc So tal eee es ling ite a tsk bk Sl nt ‘lame yan poi seme avoiding the blast ofthe ae purifiers ashe eoesed the tiled soot eee eye Lets goto Golgoral “Did you get brochure” HHesghed' reigned sg Yo Lgotthem She abe atte wad Wonder fer meee thm, Ob, dont ok so depress you Loom yo say enay oct ‘eta A tp tough tine She chad he brochures Diketeca Ti gong lowe evry mine of “wpe le pn your pect: S ai duly gelag cons enuf and my busnirding. Sella tshould: He aed hie entnce over tothe cota ities and made heals de "hy siht she repld. “Ahoy wil do you god. You come bck fll of leh ideas and snoroughy reared She Siesonrane thebrerein hae Wed as Sything oo lat igh pet the cen” Se eet tre sileen would waloy int James Ics mig beter han he sit f lood ad Je would Fikret ace war pce hans ve ballet pstormance™ “Dante acl dear Any al he ore reson getihom sway proned Mandy, Ty hav ong ie 0 ‘Seley on he rottops these ayes Novag eet do be eat overdoing the incredulous sone Dill have underground fee pay frends when Wovbboy? Did youhaes =? “Oar dn' star tha api, When wil you derstand at chron cannot aprece what they have alway Ba? Let chem se ow len ive not aget oer counties” Mandy aud, Then she consnued, We ould have shown thom lore Fehape we shoul ke dhe Spa Did you Know thatthe cidica of Spat were placed in military ade st the age of eg sod sold wo sel shee ood oF Stine? The crne’was gating caught T wonder what out ‘Sideen would hoof the by tit 2 Tox gra on bi Shorea aor dn et his lee dcover halen and edie cup hs smock? He bl ye seach hs ae forse of agement. “They would probably think he was «dam fool and so dot aon epi ‘She ted gan. Perhaps we should sake tem w Rome. “Oe Pompei he day beloe erupted wand leave chem shee! 15 Gerry Kikoort “Don't be nasty. What about the Holy Land a the time of the Crusades; finished twelve-year-old ‘James, who had entered the kitchen eating “Not before your dinner, James,” complained his mother "Your father and I wil deide where weare ing go and wath yourhands, Where's Julie? ‘Se’ coming” ‘That evening Simon and Mandy Falk sta che able poring cover brochures and Sighting over places, prices, and dates unl thefronedoor sang sy, eling them that their loses ends ‘were waiting to enter the house. Simon pressed a switch and shorly afterwards Haery apd Sarah Tolbute entered the room, lela tine gan chipel Hay, onng ‘Simon sill and scratched the bridge of hi ose “Yep. We eas decide where to go. Or should I say wen t0 ‘0? Ite bic confusing” “If you are talking about gime-tours, why dos’t you come wth Us? We're going to sce the Cracfcion, ssid Sara with a Fide ick of her hea, “Tae what!" ered the Faths together "The Crucifixion of Chris, sid Harry nonchalantly. He became citnest, "You see we thought the children needed to see exaely what happened so tha they had el understanding ‘of religion and whatit means. You know what children are like “We know said Simon in hollow tone Sarah continued. "Tf they could soe exatly how Jesus died r0 saves -or our souls or whatever it was that he saved—itmight haves profound effect on them. At lest, we hopeit wil ‘Simon began mixing the drinks. ‘Tan'e ie bit sacrilegious?” esd quietly T mean, afterall Harry spoke again. "Well, suppose on the surface it docs scam a bit ghoulish and bloodthirsty, bu as long 28 one goes with the right atta I hint all ight As Tong sone Beas Jnmind what ones there oe” Mandy said, Do you know, that is exacdy what I was thinking hefore you came over? Wasnt] Simon?” "Yes 7ma mind-reader’ he winked at Harry. Mandy ignored Iim. "We are drawing too fr away from the things that macter ini, ike religion.” 16 Lets go t0Golgota "You've not mentioned gong to church in ven yeas scoffed Simon, ‘Mandy dismiesed his remark with fek of her hand. "That's not imporean she retorted.’ pack of old men droning outof the scriptures is not religion. E want to sce the real thing— [thine should go, Sitnon “Ths it was decided by Mandy and Sarah. Sion his family and thee friends were going tose the Crucifixion, at modest package tour pres, ofcourse. an ‘Time-Tours Limited had its offices in Southend High ‘Square. The Fale and the "Touts shared loner tothe pee tour lecture ro economize on the fare, The day was unusually bright ford season and inthe later protected from che fresh seabreeze,they were warm and exited, Simon always fle ood ‘onaday when the sun managed to cuits way through the layers fof cloud and he could se twinkling om the gant floating platform that unched the searships high above dhe sky Fe had fnever been into space, Simon Falk was secretly «coafiemed omebody, "They reached che small ecwore hall and took seats inside. Simon looked around him, “Theres quite few people hers he whispeced to Harry. ‘Do you think they areal on orto?” “Mast be, ssid Harry. "There no other lecture booked for voday” “Can have yoursttenion please? A young, serious-looking clergyman stood on the small rostrum before them. The ‘nurturing died down, The vicar was shor: man with old fashioned glass spectacles It was an affection ofthe clergy. His glasacs lashed Hike metal dissin the sulight that fell stripes down the eas sie of the hall, “Fics of all, weleome to Pan Time-Tours. Lam one of your reparation Officers an Iam hete to give you advice on what tw expect and how you must conduct Yourselves’ He smile, "We do not lay down any rules butts important you shoul lknow how to set because on this tour as on many others, you ‘wil be mixing withthe locals. You must be inconspicuous— this isthe primary cule? ‘One or two hands shot wp, but the clergyman waved them a Gany Kitoor ‘down. ‘Now, I know a lot of you will ave questions, but I ‘must ask you to be patent. We will give you time at the termination of the leetate to get your queries answered. Many ‘of thera will probably be dale with athe leevare continues. Weave done allthis before He looked up and smiled again. The sualight from the window struck his ee cheek, smearing it with ly gol, and the audience setledl comfortably in their sole chairs. "You wil all he ised with the appropriate clothing before xy: embark, and everyone wil go trough ou treatment room to-ensure that heir outward appearance docs ot clash with, ‘hat of she natives. This is 2 perfectly harmless process and is cenily reversible on retuea from your holiday. We ean't have ny giant Nordic blondes sending out like poorly disguised WVikinge at a Ramadan fest. "A few days before the tip you willal be invited xo vist our language laboratory, where you wil be taughr Hebrew by the Knowledge-isjction principle during one afternoon. At you probably know, the Knowledge will only ast about a mouth before it disappears completly from your brains, We cant suff itin in ewo or three hours and expect it to remain there, ‘otherwise we would all be briliant” Tle gave asoe eniget, “Can‘t be a Roman solder” «spotty faced youth shouted from behind Simon. “The clergyman reproved the caller with stern finger and said gravely, Sis I did warn you not to ask questions unt the end You wil be given ample opportanity then. However I wil give you a reply because Iwas shorly coming to the importance of being Hebrews. The tour needs to stay together. ARoman soldier ‘orto tagging along behind civilian will not look right, and besides, occupation to9ps have commitments—they might be recalled to haracks at shore notice. You might be stopped for diy buttons or something-a soldier is 0 vulnerable. Apart, fromall this, soles actin a particular fashion and have gestures, snd phrases posit their profession —we would e sure ove ‘ourselves ew. Takei from me that we need to go as cians” “Tdon't want to bea Jew,’ muttered James, Simon nudged him to be quiet. “The speaker continued.‘Now thislas partis mostimportant— Let goto Golgothal, and [shall understand if any of you wish to drop out you

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