Running Head: PARENTAL UPBRINGING AND UNHEALTHY ADULT RELATIONSHIPS

Parental Upbringing and Unhealthy Adult Relationships

Mindy Venners
ETR 520
Northern Illinois University

PARENTAL UPBRINGING AND UNHEALTHY ADULT RELATIONSHIPS

Table of Contents
Title Page..1
Table of Contents.2
Main Body
I. Problem to be investigated
A. Purpose and Justification of the study..4
B. Research question and hypothesis.4
C. Definition of terms..5
D. Brief overview of study..5
II. Background and review of related literature
A. Introduction.5
B. Studies reviewed by theme..5-9
III. Procedures
A.

Description of the research design.9

B.

Description of the sample.9

C.

Description of the instruments used.10

PARENTAL UPBRINGING AND UNHEALTHY ADULT RELATIONSHIPS

D.

Explanation of the procedures followed10

E.

Discussion of internal validity....11

F.

Description of the statistical techniques or other methods of analysis used..11

IV.

Ethics and human relations.12

Timeline....12
References.13
Appendix...13

PARENTAL UPBRINGING AND UNHEALTHY ADULT RELATIONSHIPS

Purpose and Justification of the Study

Interpersonal relationships are a key component to an individuals emotional well-being.
Relationships can exist between co-workers, peers, family members, acquaintances, and
romantic partners. The healthiness of these relationships can sometimes determine whether a
person has a strong or weak support system in achieving goals and living a successful life in a
variety of areas. With the divorce rates for adults growing increasingly higher in the United
States, it is important to study the effects of childhood upbringing on unhealthy adult
relationships and the characteristics that people learn from their parental influences (Ingraham,
2014). By conducting this study, we can begin to look at ways to break the cycle of divorce and
other unhealthy relationship habits. Numerous studies have been done about the influence that
divorce has on children, but I would like to establish the extent to which parental upbringing
predicts adult behaviors within interpersonal relationships.
Hypothesis and Theoretical Relevance
The focus of my research proposal is if there is a correlation between unhealthy adult
relationships and an unhealthy childhood upbringing. My hypothesis is that unhealthy adult
relationships are a direct result of unhealthy parental influences during younger years.
This topic is similar to cognitive-behavioral research because it is based on changes in behavior
and cognition with methodological results. Cognitive-behavioral theories provide great flexibility
in treatment groups and interventions, and share an emphasis on the importance of cognitive
circumstances and private events as mediators of behavioral change. Specific thoughts and
beliefs may not be in ones immediate awareness, but with proper research and practice,
individuals can become aware of these. Our thinking mediates the way we respond to

PARENTAL UPBRINGING AND UNHEALTHY ADULT RELATIONSHIPS

environmental cues, and we react to situations based on what we have learned. This topic can
also coincide with the theory of experiential learning in which one makes discoveries by gaining
knowledge firsthand instead of hearing or reading about others experiences (Reynolds 2009).
Definition of Terms
When conducting my research, I focused on a few different search terms and descriptors.
According to the Hall Health Center Mental Health Clinic, unhealthy relationships are any
relationship that can cause discomfort or harm to a person instead of enriching or adding joy to
our lives (Hall Health Center, 2014). The definition of divorce is the ending of a marriage by a
legal process, or a complete separation between two things as stated in Merriam-Websters
Collegiate Dictionary (2009). I found previous research on divorce studies, emotional
disturbances in childhood, codependency tendencies, and intimacy and neglect issues. I used
online article databases, as well as a few online periodicals to find previous research relevant to
the topic.
Background and Review of Related Literature
The first example in my literature review is from an article in Psychology Today (Smith
2010) that explains six myths and facts about how our childhood affects our adult life. The
article explains that it is not simply the parental influence that affects unhealthy adult
relationships, but the combination of that with our own personality that determines our
relationship outcome.
The next example is from an article by Rosa Silverman (2012) titled Children suffer
effects of parents' divorce into adult life. The article was written for The Telegraph newspaper
in the United Kingdom. Some of the focus was on the social and psychological effects that

PARENTAL UPBRINGING AND UNHEALTHY ADULT RELATIONSHIPS

divorce has on children as they reach their 30s. Family breakdown during childhood was
consistently associated with psychological distress in adulthood during peoples early 30s, the
study said. The picture was the same across different generations, suggesting that although
divorce and separation have become more common than they once were, the impact they have on
mental health has not decreased. The report, funded by the Economic and Social Research
Council, said that good health depended on lifestyle conditions, or social medicines. These
were said to include a stable family life, stress-free childhood, alcohol-free culture for young
people, secure and rewarding employment, positive relationships with friends and neighbors and
a socially active old age. The paper said: People who suffer stresses such as parental divorce in
childhood are at a higher risk of social and psychological problems later in their adult lives
(Silverman, 2012).
Another example used for my research is an article from the Energetics Institute in
Washington, written by Richard Boyd, that describes the notion that people have the distorted
view that their own happiness relies on the acceptance and intimacy from another human being
(2012). Boyds research states that the bond that an infant forms with its mother is a main factor
in determining their idea of a happy relationship as an adult.
In an excerpt from Psychology Encyclopedia (2015), a number of studies conducted
during the past thirty years have pointed to two overarching dimensions of the parent-child
relationship that appear to be systematically linked to the child's psychological development:
how responsive the parents are, and how demanding they are. Responsive parents are warm and
accepting toward their children, enjoying them and trying to see things from their perspective. In
contrast, parents who are low in responsiveness tend to be aloof, rejecting, or critical. They show

PARENTAL UPBRINGING AND UNHEALTHY ADULT RELATIONSHIPS

little pleasure in their children and are often insensitive to their emotional needs. Demanding
parents maintain consistent standards for their child's behavior. In contrast, parents who are
insufficiently demanding are too lenient; they exercise minimal control, provide little guidance,
and often yield to their child's demands. Children's healthy psychological development is
facilitated when the parents are both responsive and moderately demanding.
According to a research article written by Sara McClanahan, children who grow up with
only one of their biological parents are disadvantaged across a broad array of outcomes. These
children are twice as likely to drop out of high school, 2.5 times as likely to become teen
mothers, and 1.4 times as likely to be idle -- out of school and out of work -- as children who
grow up with both parents. Children in one-parent families also have lower grade point averages,
lower college aspirations, and poorer attendance records. As adults, they have higher rates of
divorce. These patterns persist even after adjusting for differences in race, parents' education,
number of siblings, and residential location.
In a study done by Shonkoff and Garner (2012), the lifelong costs of childhood toxic
stress are significant and impact learning, behavior, and health. Effective early childhood
interventions provide critical opportunities to prevent these undesirable outcomes and generate
large economic returns for all of society. The vitality and sustainability of a healthy society is
directly related to productive childhood experiences and a stable foundation in which a person
grows up.
In another reviewed article, researchers found that many relationships fail these days due
to divorce, infidelity, lack of communication, and many other factors. The article suggests that

many of these relationships stopped working because the unconscious mind finally reached the
PARENTAL UPBRINGING AND UNHEALTHY ADULT RELATIONSHIPS

realization that the individuals necessary self-needs of love were not being met appropriately. A
persons unconscious mind is embedded with childhood experiences that become the subliminal
motivating force for behavior later in life, often leading to failed relationships (Shah, 2009).
The concept of codependence was introduced during my research. According to the
Department of Counseling and Rehabilitation at California State University in Fresno,
codependence is a serious concern for many women and men in our culture. Codependence is
defined as the tendency to place the needs and wants of others first and to the exclusion of
acknowledging one's own. Most affected individuals do not fully realize the impact
codependence has on their lives until they are adults and attempting to form and sustain stable
relationships; maintaining effective relationships with their own children is also extremely
stressful. Prior to adulthood, codependent persons may realize there is something wrong, but this
dull sense of awareness is often rationalized as "adolescence," or the problems of growing up, or
a number of other easily discounted symptoms. The development of codependence occurs over a
fairly long period of time, and has its roots in a dysfunctional childhood upbringing (Smith,
1991).
Often in adulthood, individuals may find themselves consistently playing out situations
where an emotional reaction is inappropriate to the situation at hand. This can often be traced
back to childhood experiences, says Karen Klienschmidt, a writer for the Global Post. Panic,
feeling threatened by sexual advances from your partner and feeling abandonment or chronic
emptiness are common among adults who have experienced childhood trauma, abuse or neglect.
Trust is also an issue in adult relationships. The inability to trust your partner can cause you to

pull away, question your relationship or avoid important issues (2015).

PARENTAL UPBRINGING AND UNHEALTHY ADULT RELATIONSHIPS

In a final example of prior research, it is said that the messages people receive about
their own self-worth and strengths, and what to expect in close relationships with other people, is
imprinted on you as you grow into adulthood. An article by Laura Schenck, from the
Mindfulness Museletter, discusses four attachment styles that are learned in childhood (2012).
These attachment styles are secure, dismissive/avoidant, preoccupied/anxious, and fearful. As
adults, these attachment styles have developed as a result of repetitive interpersonal interactions
with important caregivers or parents throughout the childhood years.
Description of the Research Design
The research methodology that will be used for this study is correlational research. A
major purpose of correlational research is to clarify our understanding of important phenomena
by identifying relationships among variables (Fraenkel & Wallen, 2009). This methodology is
appropriate for this study because the relationship between variables can explain a specific
outcome and may even have a causal effect (Fraenkel & Wallen, 2009). This study will be
considered a prediction study due to the variables that will be tested.
Description of the Sample
The participants in this study are 200 men and 200 women, from four general ethnic
backgrounds, half of them raised in one-parent households and the other half in two-parent
households. The sample size is sufficient for this methodology because it is not too small or not
too large. The ethnic groups will be Caucasian, African-American, Latino heritage, and other,
with a sample size of 100 members from each category. The sampling method will be to give out
the survey to 18 to 45 year old individuals that fit into the two divorce classifications. These

individuals will be selected from the students and staff at the higher education institutions
PARENTAL UPBRINGING AND UNHEALTHY ADULT RELATIONSHIPS

10

located within the Chicagoland area. This population includes individuals from all ethnicities
and age groups in the study, so it will allow for a well distributed representation of the variables.
The sampling method is purposive due to the intentional selection of participants based on their
experience with the concept being studied, and convenient because of the close proximity of the
sample population.
Description of the Instruments
The independent variable in this study will be if individuals are from a single parent or
two- parent family. To establish this, the participants will be asked this question as a prerequisite
for the study, as well as selecting their ethnic background. The dependent variable is having
unhealthy relationships in adulthood. The instruments used will be administering a
questionnaire and holding in person interviews. A few of the main questions that will be asked on
the questionnaire are current relationship status, extroverted or introverted personalities, cheating
tendencies, mental or physical abuse history, and personal descriptions of healthy relationships.
Explanation of the Procedures Followed
After the sample population is selected by determining their familial status and their
ethnicity, the individuals will fill out the detailed questionnaire and will meet with the researcher
for a short in person interview that will establish their verbal and non-verbal cues, and give the
researcher further insight into the participants individual personalities. The questionnaire will
be administered at the Northern Illinois University campus after the participants are recruited
from other higher education institutions based on their prior answers during the selection
process.

PARENTAL UPBRINGING AND UNHEALTHY ADULT RELATIONSHIPS

11

Discussion of Internal Validity

One possible threat to internal validity in the study is subject characteristics. The subjects
of the study can have certain characteristics or demographics as a group based on the sampling
methods used. Strategies for controlling this threat in the study include ensuring that the sample
groups are chosen randomly from the different institutions, with the exception of the dependent
and demographic variables.
Another possible threat to internal validity is instrumentation. Results can vary based on
the type of instruments used and the way they are utilized to carry out the study. Making sure
that the researcher is unbiased in the interview process can minimize this threat.
Location can also be a factor affecting the study if participants are not at the same
comfort level, so conducting all interviews at one location will alleviate this possible
interference.
The final threat to internal validity might be history. People have experienced all
different kinds of things throughout their lives that may change their historical and future
perspectives accordingly. Maintaining a high level of random selection after meeting the specific
requirements of the study can help by accounting for the possibility of individual personal
differences or prior experiences.
Description of the Statistical Techniques or Other Methods of Analysis Used
Since the researcher will be using a predictor variable and a criterion variable, these will
be gathered one right after the other. The predictor variable will be if the individuals are from a
one or two parent family. The criterion variable will be if the individual shows any evidence of
unhealthy adult relationships present. The questionnaires will be tallied, and the number of

PARENTAL UPBRINGING AND UNHEALTHY ADULT RELATIONSHIPS

12

similar answers will be added up for each question. From these variables, a correlation
coefficient will be determined, and the results will be displayed with a scatterplot, a bar graph,
and a multiple correlation diagram.
Ethics and Human Relations
Participants will have the option to participate in the survey or to decline. Participants will
remain anonymous throughout the duration of the study and when results are finalized. The
questionnaire will be administered by a carefully selected panel of experienced practitioners that
will carry out the study in a professional manner. The interview will be conducted by certified
counselors that ensure confidentiality and equality.
Time Line
The study will take place within a two month time span, once during the spring academic
semester, and once during the fall semester. First, the two question survey will go out to
participating individuals in order to select the specific sample group. Then, in the next two
weeks, the individuals will be randomly selected to partake in a short observation interview until
the entire sample population has been met with. After these meeting sessions, the questionnaire
will be sent home with each participant, and will need to be sent back within a ten day period.
Once these questionnaires are received, the findings can be grouped and analyzed.

References
Boyd, R. (2011). How early life attachment affects adult intimacy and relationships. Energetics
Institute: Inglewood, WA (p. 1-2).
Fraenkel, J. & Wallen, N. (2009). Designing and evaluating research in education. New York:
McGraw-Hill.
Kleinschmidt, K. (2007). How does a bad childhood affect relationships? Global Post, pp. 1-3.
McClanahan, S. (2001). The consequences of single-motherhood. The American Prospect, pp.
2-8.
Schenck, L. (2012, February 19). How does your attachment style impact your adult
relationships? Mindfulness Museletter, pp. 1-4.
Shah, M. (2009). Falling out of love? Berkeley Scientific Journal, 12(2).
Shonkoff, J. P. and Garner, A. P. (2012). The lifelong effects of early childhood adversity and
toxic stress. Pediatrics, 129.
Silverman, R. (November 7, 2012). Children suffer effects of parents' divorce into adult life.
The Telegraph: Telegraph Media Group.
Smith, A. (April 28, 2010). Can Our Childhood Really Predict Our Future?: Six myths and facts
about how our childhood impacts our adult life. Psychology Today. Sussex Publishers, pp. 1-3.
(1), 232-246.
Smith, D. H. (1991). Codependence: Painful Adult Behaviors Learned in Childhood.
Department of Counseling and Rehabilitation. California State University, Fresno. 1991.
Steinberg, L (2015). Parent-Child Relationships - Infancy, Toddlerhood, Preschool, School age,
Adolescents, Adults. Psychology Encyclopedia. Net Industries (p. 9-11).

Appendix
Questionnaire #1
a)

Were you raised in a one parent or two parent family?

b)

Select your ethnic background (Caucasian, African-American, Latino decent,

Other)
Questionnaire #2

a)

What is your current relationship status?

b)

Are you an extrovert or introvert?

c)

Have you ever cheated on a significant other?

d)

Have you ever been mentally abusive toward another individual?

e)

Have you ever been physically abusive toward another individual?