Gods Got Jokes

(Final Draft)
By: Antehya Murray
Dear God,
Thank you for everything youve done, and everything youre about to do. Its been crazy this
week. I had a biology test, a math quiz, and a book report due. Please let me have passed them
all. Additionally, Lord, please,please, please help me pass my Drivers Ed. test, and please allow
me to be able to have a car of my own, so my mom doesnt have to drive me everywhere. Let my
car be red, and a convertible, and just so awesome! Amen.
Okay, so I guess Ive stopped thinking of God as some kind of Genie who grants me every wish,
but he did say Ye shall not have, unless ye ask (or something like that). So this is what I prayed
a month ago, right before I went to bed. However, I guess The Man Above only gives you what
you ask for, and I probably should have been more specific than a red convertible thats
awesome.
So... introductions. Hi, my name is Anabel Summers, Im seventeen years old, and currently
serving six months in the Mercer County Juvenile Detention Center for possession of a stolen
vehicle. The irony of the situation is that the car, a 2007 Jaguar XK, originally belonged to the
Governor. A week Ive had that car and then Mr. Big Shot Governor decides to remember that a)
its his car,and b) itd been missing for over fourteen days. So...yeah. Thats kind of the gist of
why. But let me tell you how I got here.
It was the day after my seventeenth birthday. All the presents had been opened, the cake eaten,
and I had a wicked headache from partying so hard the night before. Honestly, I was exhausted,
and not all that thrilled when my phone rang and Cher Lloyd started singing about her haters that
were jacking her swag. Annoyed, I rolled over, groaned, and picked up the phone.
Hello?
Princess! How was your birthday, baby?
I sighed. Uncle Joey, you know Im not allowed to talk to you anymore. And hey,
whend you get out of prison?
Ah hah! You see, I never went.
I let out a low whistle. Geez, Uncle Joey. No wonder mom doesnt let me talk to you!
Yeah,well. Listen princess, do you want your birthday present or not?
I hauled the top half of myself out of the bed. Yeah!
Look outside your window.
I crawled across my bed and peeked out of the mini-blinds covering my window. Standing in my
driveway was Uncle Joey, his bald spot gleaming in the 8am sunlight. Beside him was the Jag,
sparkling with pinpoints of sunlight that reflected off its ruby red exterior. I squealed in
excitement and ran out my room, practically falling down the stairs, and throwing my phone on

the couch. When I got outside, I was screaming like a crazy person. You got me a car?!
Seriously?! Thank you, thank you, thank you!!! I squealed, hugging Uncle Joeys waist. His
smile was that of a father whod just realized hed made his daughter the happiest person in the
world.
Yeah, its yours, baby. But dont tell anyone who gave it to you. He nudged me
playfully(Oh,but how serious he was).
I let go of his waist and looked up at him wistfully. Thanks, Uncle Joey. I really
appreciate it.
Dont mention it, princess. Now,I have to go. People to see, money to make and
whatnot. I just came by to drop off your new wheels.
I sighed. Okkkkkkaaaaayyyy. Hey, youre still staying at Cousin Freddies, right?
Yeah.
I stood up straighter. Okay. Do you want to go to the store with me?
Nah. I gotta jet. See ya around, princess. And with that, Uncle Joey turned around and
walked down the street. Where he went, I dont know, but I was too busy texting to notice the
squad car sitting under the willow tree fifty feet away.
Oh, and before you get on my case for being a bit dumb, and not questioning where Uncle Joey
got the car, I had thought about it, really, I did. You see, a lot the stuff Uncle Joey did may not
have been legal, but it Gomez gets her head shaved. While we were walking out I clicked the
Unlock button on the car beeper. I didnt notice the squad car sitting quietly under a tree. As soon
as Id started climbing into the drivers seat, the cop, pulled up beside me.
Excuse me miss, but uh....where did you get that car?
Um, a friend gave it to me for my birthday, why?
Miss, are you aware that the car you are driving was reported stolen a week ago?
I was speechless. Um, no.
Im afraid Im going to have to take you in for questioning.
Finally, Autumn decided to speak up. But Officer, she squinted at his name tag. Officer
Makowski, I know Anabel. She couldnt have stolen it! Shes too much of a good girl!
Nonetheless, I still have to take her downtown and you with her, if you have anything
else to say. Autumn sat back, shocked. Then she started climbing out of the car. You know,
Annie, I think Ill find another ride home. I hope everything works out. Then she was gone. I
was handcuffed as Officer Makowski starting reciting my Miranda Rights.
So thats it. When I got to the station, I tried making my one phone call to Uncle Joey.
Unfortunately, his phone was disconnected. On trial, I plead innocent. The judge found me
guilty. Its not really my fault, but I guess it is, because this is what I asked for in a sense. And
its weird because The Man Above may have a sense of humor, but you know what?

I dont find it funny.

(Oh, and by the way, Uncle Joey came to visit me. He denied stealing the car, saying he bought it
from his friend Vito. I was this close to strangling him for his stupidity, seeing as Vito is always
in and out of prison, for theft and drug possession.)