Aman 1

0 to 20 (mph)
God dammit, Rebecca! Eyes on the road!
My dad has a dirty mouth, especially when it comes to driving, and even more so when
my sister is behind the wheel.
Rebecca hates driving, which is probably why shes a terrible driver. You know how in
Steamboat Willie, Mickey Mouse turns the wheel back and forth, humming as he drives the
ship? Well, Rebecca does this in real life. While we were driving to Yogurt Mountain to get
dessert, or attempting to, we drifted in and out of our lane, jerking as she randomly slammed her
foot on the gas pedal only to take it off again. The annoying part of Rebeccas driving is that you
cant really blame her for it. Shes been diagnosed with a spatial and reasoning deficit and
ADD, which means that not only does she struggle in geometry, but she also cant drive to save
her, or anyone elses, life.
Fortunately, or maybe not, she understands that her driving is not up to par with her
writing, swimming, or even geometry skills. This means that she will only make a left turn
without the green arrow if no cars can be seen coming the other way for a mile; she stops
completely at every stop sign for at least two Mississippi; and she only parks if there is space for
at least two cars.
Despite these precautions, her driving still terrifies me, and probably her too, because she
drives only when absolutely necessary. I have to forcibly distract myself when she is driving by
looking at my phone, reading a book, or really anything to take my eyes off the road. This often
makes me car sick, but it is better than watching my imminent death. If I pay attention to the
road, I end up yelling at Rebecca, which just makes her more distracted.

Aman 2
All that said, its understandable that I was nervous about my driving test. I had to get my
license because then I wouldnt have to endure Rebeccas driving any more, and I wouldnt ever
get stuck anywhere again.
Getting stuck somewhere is the worst feeling in the world. When I was in sixth grade, I
left in the middle of the school day to go practice gymnastics for a few hours. One Tuesday
morning at 10 am, my nanny, Debbie, was supposed to pick me up where ML carpool is in the
morning and bring me to the gym. It was freezing outside, but she was often late, so I waited a
few minutes before getting worried.
After what seemed like a while, I went to get my phone to try to call or text her.
Unfortunately, I had an old, crappy, dumb phone because I was too young to have an iPhone,
so naturally, it was dead. I put it away and waited a while longer, freezing my butt off.
Finally, I went inside to check what time it was. It was 10:45! Even if she arrived at that
moment, I would miss most of practice. I didnt know what to do, so I went back out into the
cold to wait some more.
A few minutes later, my mom walked by, probably heading to a meeting.
What are you doing here? she said.
I replied, Debbie never-r-r came, because at that point, I was on the verge of tears.
Ugh, I cant believe her! Go back inside and get some work done, and Ill call her and
tell you what she says.
Okay-y-y.
My mom later told me that Debbie had completely forgotten to pick me up. I could only
imagine sitting outside for two hours if my mom hadnt happened to walk by.
So I really had to get my license.

Aman 3
I wanted my license so badly that I was overwrought before my test, and I was especially
anxious for the parallel parking. I kept going over what my driving instructor had drilled in my
head turn on the signal! and LOOK FIRST! but I wound up thinking about what could
happen if I messed up.
It was finally the big day (March 4, 2015, to be exact). It was a relatively normal
Wednesday, and after school I drove my mom to the Milner Driving School to take my test.
After I adjusted my seat to the highest possible position, Milner Junior (the harsher of the
father/son combo, just my luck) told me to do a quick stop. I did it flawlessly, moving on to
perform the backing test. All I had to do was back up straight for twenty feet, so I wasnt really
worried about this part of the test.
But all of a sudden I hit something. I realized that it was the curb; I had somehow
managed to back up completely crooked. I pulled forward to correct myself, but the next part
was the parallel parking.
I knew that since I messed up backing up, I had to perform it perfectly. My heart was
slamming in my chest, my hands shaking; I felt like I was about to compete on beam. But I
focused on one step at a time, and I parallel parked seamlessly! After that, the rest of the test
went relatively smoothly.
Once I pulled into the parking spot in front of the driving school and put the car into park,
Milner Junior said the best two words of my life: You passed. I didnt hear anything he said
after that because it didnt matter if I messed up; I could drive! (Well, I did remember that he
mentioned I hit the curb because I was vertically challenged and therefore had trouble seeing
behind me.)

Aman 4
The next day at school I proudly showed off my license by going off campus to Panera
during lunch with my friends. I thought I was so cool, like when you get your first pair of
sunglasses when youre in elementary school, and you wear them everywhere, inside or out. I
had a good time with my friends, but I found that going off campus was not as glorious as I
thought it would be. I was stressed about getting back to English on time, and I didnt have time
to eat at the restaurant, so I had to eat during class.
Driving also allowed me to form fun traditions with friends and family. Every Friday,
Rebecca, Andrew, and I go to Starbucks before school. Rebecca gets a mocha, Andrew gets a
cookie (at 9 am!), and I usually decide on English Breakfast tea, mainly for the caffeine, and
sometimes a mini vanilla scone. I enjoy the drinks and/or food, but it is a costly tradition, and it
creates anxiety because we have to leave the house a few minutes earlier.
My favorite memory of driving isnt going off campus with friends or to Starbucks with
Rebecca and Andrew, but rather being alone. Often Im driving home from the gym, and with no
specific time I have to be there, I just drive. Not to get somewhere, not to meet someone, just to
be. When a song I love comes on, Ill roll the windows down, crank up the volume, and just
drive. My hair is flying is my face, but I dont care. My ears and head throb a little from the
speakers, but I dont care. When I start to get close to home, I take detours around my
neighborhood because I dont want the moment to end. I drive until an ad comes on, usually that
annoying Shane Company one, and my trance breaks.
Driving is a measure of independence for all teenagers. I, along with most teenagers,
(except for maybe Rebecca) want separation from my family. Being able to drive means that I
can go get a cup of tea on an early morning, drive myself to or from the gym whenever I want, or
just cruise with the music on max and the windows rolled down.

Aman 5
But more than just offering independence, driving puts me in control. A lot of things in
my life are out of my hands. When I go to a meet, I can control how I perform, but not how the
judges score me. I can write my best APUSH essay possible, but I dont know how Dr. Barksdale
will grade me. But I love to be in control. Its why I keep an assignment notebook to keep track
of my work. Its why I check to make sure my mom has my gym bag every day (even though I
hand it to her in the morning). Its why I triple check that my assignment was submitted on
canvas, even though I saw it go through. Its why some people call me a leader, but others just
call me bossy.
When I drive, I am in control. I can turn the music up and roll the windows down. I
decide if I will be late or early, if I will break the law and speed, if I will parallel park, if I will
take the highway or Roswell Road, or almost anything else. When Dr. Aquino takes off 10% of
my math test for missing a negative, I can roll the windows down and scream the words to
Could Have Been Me.
When my life turns to chaos, driving gives me enough control over my life to put my
mind at ease, at least for the moment.
Plus I dont have to deal with Rebeccas driving anymore.