1

DISCLAIMER

The jokes collected in this e-book are contributed by people

all around the world. We are claiming no copyright on
most of the individual jokes found in this e -book. Most of
them are, to the best of our knowledge, in the public domain.
It is possible that some of the jokes within the collection
are actually copyrighted. If there is any unfair misuse
of copyright in this e -book, it was not willful. Contact
support@tintumon.com and we will remove it.

This collection is copyright © 2009 by Tintumon.com.

All rights reserved. We are not claiming this for the jokes
on this book. We are claiming an “editor ’s” or “collection”
copyright.
 1
Ambalam

Tintumon: I love u…

girl: kaalil cherippu undu..

Tintu: “Ente hridhayam AMBALAM alla… kayari

ponnolu……!!

Tintumon aaaaaaara mon !!

 2
Kalyanam

Mintumol: “I love u”

Tintumon: “I love u too”

Mintumol: “Namukku kalyanam kazhikkam”

Tintumon: “Pakshe aru nammale kalyanam kazhikkum???”

 3
Wrong answer

Teacher: “If you add 3452 and 3096, then divide the
answer by 4 and multiply by 6, what would you get?”

Tintumon: “Wrong answer”

 4
Why boys chase girls ?

Tintumol: Ningal boys enthina girls-ne chase

cheyyunnathu. Ningalkkavare Marry cheyyan plan
illenkilum.

Tintumon: Pattikal car-inu pirake odunnathu car

odikkanano ?
 5
Pathra vayna

Pathrathile vartha Tintu mon ingane vayichu: ”Ayyayo K V

sebastian Pottitherichu”

Achan: Manda !! nokki vayikku “110 KV substation

Pottitherichu enna”
 6
No freeze liquid

Teacher: ‘Freeze aakatha oru liquid-nte peru parayoo’

Tintumon: ‘Chooduvellam’
 7
Punishment

Tintumon:”Cheyyaatha kaaryathinu enne shikshikkumo

teacher?”

Teacher:”Orikkalumilla.”

Tintumon:”Nalla teacher, njan homework cheythittillaa!!”

 8
Track suit

Tintumon was chasing a donkey. But he couldnt catch

that. After sometime he saw one zebra on the way.
Tintumon caught the zebra and told: “panni track suit
ittal njan nine pidikilla ennu karuthiyo?”
 9
Best husband

Three Malayali Couples in a Restaurant….

Couple 1 : Husband: “aa sugar ingeduthe Panjare….”

Couple 2 : Husband: “aa liver ingeduthe Karale………”

Upon hearing the above conversation, the third couple

started…….

Couple 3: dundu mol : kandille manushya, avarudeyokke

sneham. Angane venam bharthakkanmar aayal!

Then,
Couple 3: Tintumon : aa beef ingeduthe Pothe..!!! :) ))
 10
Maths Proof

Exam Qn:
IF 2(l+b)=P;
Prove that 4b=P.

Tintumon :
2(l+b)=P
2(ell+b)=P
2(bone+b)=P
taking ‘b’ comon
2b(one+1)=P
2b(2)=P
4b=P!

Tintumonoda kali
 11
Interview

malayalam pareeksha ezhuthikondirikkunna tintumon

qn: prashastha kavayathri Sugathakumariyumaayulla oru

abhimukham ezhuthuka

tintumon inganne ezhuthi…..

Njan: namasth teacher. njan teacherumaayi oru

abhimukham nadathaan vanathaanu

Sugathakumari: samayamila mone..poyittu pinne varu.

Njan: shari teacher

kali tintumonnodo???
 12
Tharavattil Pirannavan

tintumon :amme njan enganeya undayathu?

amma:mone nee vellapokkathil ozhukivannatha

tintumon:appol ammayum achanum appooppanum

enganeya undayathu?

amma:njangalum vellapokkathil ozhukivannatha

tintumon:appol evide tharavattil piranna otta orennam

ellalle
 13
Cheetha koottukar

Oru divasam achan tintumonodu: “da nee innale kudichu

bodham illathe aanu vannathu..enthadaa ithu”..

tintu: ”ellaam cheetha koottukettukal kaaranama achaa..!!

aake 5 beer, 5 koottukaar.., athil 4 perum kudikkilla ennu
vechaal pinne njan enthu cheyyanaa..!!!. :) “
 14
Pootum Thakolum

Tintu mon in super market

tintu:Chetta kalikkudukka undo?

sales man:illa
tintu:ice cream undo?
sales man:illa
tintu:chocolate undo?
sales man:illa
tintu:pootum thakolum undo?
sales man:undu
tintu:enna shop pootti veettil poykkude
 15
Tajmahal

Teachr: “Bharya’yude ormakayi shajahan

‘TAJ MAHAL’ panithu”
.
.
.
Tintum0an: Alla, njan onnu chothichotte ,
iyaal ithra valiya maravikaaran aayirunno ?
 16
Complan

Kaattiloode nadannu pokunna Tintumon marathil

thoongi kidakkunna paampine kandappol paranjathu
enthu??
.
.
.
.
.
“Veruthe thoongi kidakkaathe mummy odu para
complan vaangitharaan!” ;)
 17
Convert

Teacher: convert the following sentence to malayalam.

” I SAW A FILM YESTERDAY”

Tintumon: Teacher innale ‘A’ padam kandu.

 18
Passive Voice

teacher: Write the passive voice of ” I made a mistake”

tintumon: ” I was made by a mistake”

 19
Poor models

FTV kanukayayirunna achante adukal vanna tintumon

FTV noki achanod
” acha avarentha cheriya dress darichirikunnath..?”
Achan: ” avar pavangalayath kondanu..

tintumon: ” ivarekalum pavangal vannal ennod

parayanam acha please “
 20
History class

Tintumon history classinu munpu prarthikunnathu kanda

teacher

teacher: ithu nalla oru sheelamanu. nee entha

prarthiche?

tintumon: ente amma paranjittundu urangunnathinu

munpu prarthinkanam ennu.
 21
Smart answer

Teacher asks !!!

children what do u wish to in future?

Vinod–I want to be doctor,

Deepa–I want to be a good mother.
Tintumon– want to help deepa.
 22
aaril anju

MATHS TEACHER: ”Aaril anju poyal enth kittum?”

TINTUMON: “Anjuvinte dead body kittum, karanam

avalku swimming ariyilla…!!
 23
Tintumonte guest

Veettil virunnu vanna penkutti kulikkunnath olinju

nokkukayayirunna Tintumonod Amma: Enthada ee
kanikkunnath

Tintumon: Chee.. mindalle. Aval nammude soap

edukkunnundonnu nokkuvaa..

Tintumonoda kali..
 24
Fee

Kaalu potti Hospitalil stich idan chenna tintu.Fees

Ethrayakum?
Doctr: 1500 rs
Tintu:veruthe 2 stich itta mathi,embroidary work onnum
venda.
 25
Interview

Actress: Tamililekkulla ente praveshanam

pettennayirunnu.

Tintumon: Athayirikkum vendathra thuni edukkan

pattathirunnath alle..!!!
 26
I love you

UKG’il padikkunna tintumonodu, LKG’il padikkunna

pappymol:”I LOVE YOU DA”

Tintu mon: “Pha dash mole, Mottennu viriyatha ninne

kittiyittu njan enthu cheyyana…”?
 27
Eduthal pongathathu

Cigarette valichukondu pokunna Tintumone kanda

palliyilachan: “Eduthaal pongaathathaanalloda ninte
chundathu?”

Tintumon: “Eduthaal pongaathathukonda acho..

valichukondu pokunne!!”
 28
Tintumon & Kallan

Tintumonte veettil kallan keri.

Ithu kanda Tintumon:

“Ente bagum bookum koodi kondu poda,
illenkil njan ellavareyum vilichunarthum”
 29
Rome

Teacher: ‘When was Rome built?’

Tintumon: ‘At night, sir.’

Teacher: ‘Who told you that?’

Tintumon: ‘You did, sir. You once said that Rome was
not built in a day.’
 30
Rocket

Breaking news

Chandranil vellam matramalla

thimingalam,kadalaama,sravu thudangiya jeevikalum
ullatay kanunnu-NASA

Tintumon: Pavam..NASAKu ariyillallo ROCKET Arabikadalil

veena karyam
 31
Bio practical exam

Tintumon attended bio practical exam.

.
Examiner: Tell the bird name by seeing leg.
.
Tintumon: I dont know.
.
Examiner: u fail.
.
Whats ur name ?
.
Tintumon: See my leg & tell.
 32
Exam barcode

Tintumon examil onnum kittathayappol peparil

||||||||||||||||||||||||||
||||||||||||||||||||||||||
||||||||||||||||||||||||||

Ithu pole barcode varachittu adiyil ezhuthi

“Scratch gently to read the answer “
 33
Girlfriend

Duttumon: “My girlfriend is an angel”

Tintumon: “You are lucky aliya. Ente girlfriend ippozhum

jeevanode undu”
 34
Achanum thengum

Thengil ninu veena achanumayi hospitalil ethiya

tintumonodu

Dr: oru 5 min. mumpu ethichirunengil

rekshapeduthamayirunu.

Tintumon: thengenu onnu veenu kittende doctor.

 35
fibre content

Tuttumol: Arinjo? oru nalla diet-lu dharalam fibre

undakanam.

Tintumon: Athinentha thega thinnal pore .

Tuttumol: Thegayil‍ high fibre content aano?

Tintumon: Pothikathe kazhichal mathi.

 36
thermodynamic law of romance

Tintumons thermodynamic law of romance:

“Luv can neither be created nor be destroyed. It can
only be changed from one girlfriend to another with
considerable loss of money”
 37
Geography

Teacher: “Tintumone.. ithavanayum ninakku geography-

kku motta poojyam aanu. Ne entha geography
padickathe ?”

Tintumon: “Achan parayarundu. Lokam anudhinam

marikondirikkukayanennu. Lokam onnu settle aayikkotte.
Ennittu padickam !”
 38
GIRL FRIEND

TINTU MON:eda enik avale marakkan pattunnilla

FRIEND:athrayku ishtamanenkil ninte veetil para

TINTU MON: Parayaam……..

U.K.G. result varatte
 39
Railway

Train nirthiyapol yathrakaran tintuvinod: ithetha

station…??

Tintumon windowilude purathek thalayitt nokiyitt:

Railway station aanenn thonunnu…!
 40
Mark

Mash: adutha pareekshakku nee 75% mark vanganam.

Tintumon: njan 100% mark vangum.
Mash: thamaasha parayallee…

Tintumon: Nayinte mone, aara aadhyam thamaasha

paranjathu?
 41
Appopan

Tintumon: Apoppan endha urangukayano?

Amma: Alla mone apoppan marichu. Nammal kozhiye

okke kollumbol athu chaville?.. athu pole..

Tintumon: Appam Eppazha kari vekkunne!!

 42
Dineshan

Teacher :What is the name of Gandhiji’s son?

Tintumon: Dineshan

Teacher :Why?????

Tintumon : Mahatma Gandhi is the father of di-neshan

 43
Progress report

Tintumonte Achan: Ninte progress report evideyada ?

Tintumon: Athu njan Ramuvinu koduthu.

Achan: Athenthinada ?

Tintumon: Avanu avante achane pedippickana…

 44
Correction in Sentence

Tintumon: Can I go to the toilet?

English Teacher: Tintumon, MAY I go to the toilet?

Tintumon: But I asked first!

 45
Proposal

Innocent Proposal from tintumon(UKG-B) to Minimol(2-A)

Tintumon: i luv u…
Minimol: chi..poda,i’m elder than u
Tintumon: i’m madly luving u…
Minimol: poda…
Tintumon: chechi chechi pls…
 46
Census

Panchayathil ninnum kanakku edukkan vanna

udhyogasthan Tintumonte veetil ethi.
Udhyogasthan: Mone ee veetil Kakoos undo?
Tintu: Undallo..
Udhyogasthan: Sheri, Kinar undo ?
Tintu : Manassilayi!!..uncle vegam chennirunnolu..avide
pipe-um bucketum undu.
 47
Tintumon and His father

Tintumon thante puthiya toy bus’umayi :

“drrrr…pee pee pom..
Stop!
Ella thendikalum irangiko.
Eni kayaraanulla kazhuverikal kayaru.
Puvam rite..drrr..
Kayari nilkada pulle.
drrr..”
Ithu shradicha tintumonte achan sahikettapol bus edthu
maati.
5 mintolam tintumon karanjapol achan bus thirichu
kodthu..
Tintumon:
“drrr pee pee pom pom..drrr.. Stop..!
Vegam irangada pattikale,
allengil thanne oru naayintemon karanam 5 minute late
aayi..!!
Puvam rite. tin tin……!!
 48
Chenda

Tintumon:”Acha, enikkoru chenda vaangi tharumo?”

Achan:”Venda, nee mattullavare upadravikkum.”

Tintumon:”Illa acha,njan ellaavarum urangikkazhinje

chenda edukku..”
 49
Muthassi

Tintu: muthashi marichu leave venam

Teachar: ninte muthashi yalle 1 masam munp marichath

Tintu: muthachan veendum ketti !!

 50
With policeman

Tintu monum ,3 friendsum koodi cyclil Schoolil

powukayaaayirunnu…

Oru Police’kaaran Kaikaatti….

Tintu : “phah….pullee.. Ippol Thanne 3 Per Aayi…

www.tintumon.com