Advice on Writing:

In last weeks blogpost, we were all, You need to tell the unique story of you on your med school apps. Then we promised wed have a new post on just how to do this on Monday. We would have done it, too, if there hadnt been a massive ketchup spill on the freeway*** (DONT ASK), meaning it was Richard Scarrys Cars and Trucks for as far as the eye could see, which really threw off our commutes.

ANYWAY. Its Wednesday now, and weve got to get down to the business of developing the right frame and thesis for those stories youve unearthed about why you want to go into medicine. After all, those juicy details wont make much sense if theyre just a bunch of connect-the-dots without any sort of lines. Start first by zooming out a bit for a better look at what youve constructed . List the main details and themes youve weaved into your essay (or are planning to) so that it looks something like this:

1. Volunteered at a clinic in Nicaragua. Consulted with on-call doctors, helped with patient intake, made sure supplies were stocked. 2. Cooking spaghetti dinner every Sunday for my parents. Mom and dad both work at our restaurant all Saturday night and are too exhausted to cook the next day. 3. Seeing a cell under a microscope for the first time. 4. That stranger giving my little brother a bottle of water on that crowded bus during a family visit to New York during a heat wave. At first glance, these things might not seem like they have a lot in common. But to that we say: make like a Rocky montage and dig deep. Think back to a lesson from your 6th grade English teacher (hopefully). 1. Who 2. How 3. Where 4. What 5. When 6. WHY When reading, writing, or, really, doing any kind of thinking these are the questions that will peel back those layers and get you where you need to go. Especially the why. Question: Why did you volunteer at the Nicaraguan clinic? Answer: I wanted to help a population with poor access to health care. Question: Why do you make Sunday spaghetti dinners for your parents? Answer: Theyve spent most of their adult lives taking care of me. This is one way that I can take care of them. Question: Why was seeing a cell under a microscope amazing? Answer: I saw life for the first time on a different scale - how even our bodies are an ecosystem.I was fascinated by what happens out of sight, and the idea that one little thing could make or break our health. Question: Why is it important to recall that moment when that stranger gave your brother that water? Why did it make an imprint on you? Answer: Heres someone who didnt have any responsibility to us reaching out and helping a little boy, no strings attached. It moved me. I also found it inspiring.

Still think theres no theme to this essay? Well then you must not have your theme hat on. We suggest a Dr. Seuss style, if youre looking.

The theme here (known in academic writing as your thesis) is wanting to help people, whether thats the people you love most or complete strangers. And the anecdote about the cell shows youve got the scientific chops to back this impulse up. By weaving these stories together under this bigger umbrella but not actually saying, You guys, I soooo love to help people, you not only communicate this larger, important idea, but you also give a much more compelling, vibrant, detailed and unique picture of who you are. And thats a good thing, because who you are is pretty cool. That said, to make this work, youre still going to need to make an outline, pay close attention to the way you transition between thoughts, and have a killer intro and conclusion to drive it all home. Well blog on one of these topics next week. On Monday. ***Disclaimer: There wasnt really a ketchup spill on the freeway. We just got behind on blogposts, alright? Last week, we talked all about how you could find your medical school application a killer theme . There was really only one super top secret ingredient: getting down to the details - the HOW and WHY rather than just that boring old what.

Writing an irresistible introduction for your med school app requires pretty much the same logic. Except to really do it well, we encourage you with two fist pumps and some ra-ra cheerleading to show us those details rather than telling them to us. Thats right, were talking about the joys of SDT (show dont tell). And yeah, dont get the order of that D and T mixed up. Think of it this way. The committees reading your essays are made up of real, live humans, not robots. Between their family lives and running hospitals and generally saving the world, theyre reading hundreds of these applications. So do em a favor. Draw them in with an opening thats intriguing - one that, at the very least, puts them in a good mood. Hook em in...preferably using one of these top five methods. 1. Anecdote Start us out with a great glimpse of life that pulls us right in. Heres one I whipped up, just because I love you guys and think you need an example. My first time volunteering in the ER, I performed major surgery. It started out simply enough. I was sitting at the nursing station, waited to receive my first assignment, when a frantic parent rushed up to me, their badly wounded child in their arms. I looked around, but no one was there to lend a hand. So, with my heart nearly pounding out of my chest, I grabbed a needle, sewed up the wound and saved a life. Theres just one thing: the patient was a teddy bear, and the parent was a chronically ill child who had spent the last three years of her life in and out of the hospital. Alright, so maybe thats not your style, but can you see what were going for here? This anecdote captures our attention, and it also sets you up to talk about patientcentered care. 2. HUMOROUS OBSERVATION What do you think Jerry Seinfelds med school personal statement would have liked if comedy hadnt worked out for him? Whats the deal with intubation? AM I RIGHT OR AM I RIGHT? Make a humorous observation that plays on a specific detail or problem everyone in the industry knows is true, and youre sure to win a sympathetic ear. 3. VIVID DESCRIPTION Make us SEE the world around you, and there will be no escaping. Describe the pristine white walls. Make us hear the steady beat of the heart monitor. Set a scene we want to be a part of, or at least observe. 4. DIALOGUE Snappy exchanges and odd statements intrigue and draw the reader right in. Did the on-call doctor call you a nasty but hilarious name? How about that patient who revealed the meaning of life? If it was interesting to you, it will be interesting to us.

5. STRAIGHTFORWARD STATEMENT Be prepared to experiment with lots of different starts until you find one that works for you. However, if you dont find anything coming together, dont sweat it. A nice straightforward statement is preferable to, say, a humorous observation that doesnt quite work. If you want to start with, Helping people in pain is important to me, then do it. One. Two. Three. Four. Five. Yep, there you have it. With intros like these, they wont be able to resist you or your well-honed wit. So, tell me about yourself. Ask a student (or anyone) this question, and youre likely to receive one of these two responses: (1) Uh... OR (2) Well, it all started on the day of my birth... That is, youll get a single word response and a blank stare or an entire life history with nary a personal detail spared. The fact of the matter is, most of us struggle to answer this question, which is tough luck because its essentially what any college essay or short answer question is asking.

So, how can you get that balance right and trump up your biggest accomplishments without turning the reader off? Follow this handy little list of DOs and DONTs. DONT just list off your accomplishments. Picture this: youre at a party. Some cute new kid from the next town over sidles up to you, flashes a heart melting smile, and then says, Hi. Im the captain of the swim team, the president of Key Club and a National Merit Scholar. People really like me. Lets go out sometime. Im guessing you wouldnt exactly be jumping at the chance for a date, would you? Well, if it turns you off in person, its a college essay turn off, too. Save the listing for your resume, where its both expected and acceptable. DO focus on your most meaningful experiences / moments / activities / accomplishments. With so much on the line (your entire college career!) its tempting to want to cram in every bullet point, big or small. But well know more about you as a person when you focus on what means the most to you. Well see your passion, values you didnt even know you were integrating into the essay, and a whole lot of personality. DONT speak in marketing / braggart terms. Something weird happens when we try to talk about ourselves. Were so trained not to, that we reach for language thats either too sanitized or is outright egotistical. Which one of your friends, for instance, would conclude a contemplative heart to heart by saying, Overall, Im proud and humbled by what I achieved that day. Allow me to be your friend for years to come, and I promise to accomplish similar results in the future. Im not saying you shouldnt reflect (please, do!) or that you shouldnt be proud or humbled. Im just saying, well, say it like you would, not like a 45 year old marketing expert. After all, we learn more about you through your unique voice than anything else, so sounding like yourself is important. DONT talk like youre a finished product. We all have flaws. Admit to them, and youre more likely to get a reader going, Yep, Ive been there. I like this kid! Dont go overboard, of course, and make sure to talk about how you know this is all a journey and youll always work hard to improve x, y and z. Just remember that everyone prefers the kid who speaks honestly about whats going on in his or head than the one that says, Ive got everything covered. I just need YOU to admit me and my master plan will be one step closer to completion. DO SHOW your individual efforts. Look, if youve contributed a lot to an organization, by all means, talk about it! As long as you do more showing than tellinghttp://www.juststartapplications.com/blog/entry/your_college_essay_show_don t_tell so we can make up our own minds about you, readers will love seeing what youve done. But, while youre at it... DO NOT degrade the efforts of others and DO talk about your involvement with a team. Even if you were the only one on your team to contribute to the project, dont degrade the efforts of your teammates. Think about any reality show youve ever watched (come on, I know you watch them) where one contestant trashes another

backstage. Most often, their teammate comes off looking like the fun, cool one we all want to hang out with while the hardworking ranters comes off like uptight braggarts. Best to keep it classy by acknowledging the contributions of others (no matter how little they may be) and showing us your leadership skills. Its a tough line to walk, but follow these tips, and youre sure to get the me me ME balance in your college essay and short answer questions juuuuust right. Happy writing!

Way back yonder when I was applying to college, there was this girl. You know, The Perfect One. The one who played every sport ever invented (thats right, she even did distance plunging), got the best grades, and volunteered at the soup kitchen just for funsies. Actually, if were honest, there wasnt just one girl. I went to a high school stuffed with smart, adventurous, cool kids, some of whom Id later bump into casually in exotic places around the world. Navigating between classes was like skipping through my own shrine of self-doubt.

So when it came time to write my college essays, I couldnt help but compare myself to the superhumans who surrounded me. If I chose to write a wacky essay about my wacky family, how would I look next to The Perfect One(s) who had built shelters in Costa Rica with her bare hands over spring break? If I wrote about my somewhat reluctant efforts as the secretary of Key Club, how could I beat that guy who had plans for starting teen political campaigns? Does this sound familiar to you? If so, youre not alone. This is one of the most common issues we face in our work with students, right from the get go. But so and so wrote this in their essay, and its really funny and makes them look so good. Im going to die if my essay isnt as good as that.

Even if youre not the one doing the comparisons, its mom and dad and all of their friends. How many times a day do you have to hear: Sarahs mom said her applications are all finished and she wrote the most brilliant essay on the spirit of volunteerism. How are your applications coming? Heres the thing: when you start work with JustStartApplications.com, this is the very first thing we work to undo. Because let me tell ya, weve seen our fair share of essays from perfect candidates and, frankly, theyre often quite a snooze. What really gets the admissions committee out of their seats and slow clapping is a good story -specifically one that stars a likable protagonist whos embarked on an introspective journey of self-discovery (in an epic way rather than a cheesy one). Whether that story is about an amazing achievement or simply a walk in the park, nothing matters unless its authentic and unique to you, and it shows us what a compelling human being you are. Take the time to write this story well, and the admissions committee wont know what hit them. Write it well, have fun, and dont be a wannabe (sorry, I couldnt resist).

Getting Letters:

As this Atlantic article points out, sometimes brutally, instructors dont love writing letters of recommendation in most cases. If you are planning to go to graduate school soon, this fact is pertinent and relevant to you for a couple of reasons:

A. You need letters of recommendation from these instructors who dont like writing letters of recommendation. B. Ideally, you need letters of recommendation that describe you in glowing terms from these instructors...who dont like writing letters of recommendation. Whats a student to do? Weve come up with a few tips to ensure that your ask is received in the best possible way: *Be Timely: Having written my fair share of letters of recommendation, I can tell you that when a student asks me to write for them and then tells me the due date is in three days, the letter just wont be my best work. I mean, how well would you be able to carve out the time in your busy life to write a glowing masterpiece in three day? Give your writers, at the minimum, a month to complete the letters. *Be Courteous: Sure, it is part of a teachers job to write letters of recommendation, but behaving as if you are entitled to a letter or coming off as demanding will be offputting to the person who you hope will say nice things about you. If you are asking via email, here is a very quick sketch of a polite way to ask: Dear Professor LoveYerWerk, As you know, I am applying to graduate school next year. I know this is a very busy time of the semester/year/quarter, but I wonder if you would be willing to write of a letter of recommendation for me. I enjoyed your seminar on _________ and the work that I did in your class really helped me to clarify my future goals. If you are able to write a letter for me, I can send you my personal statement, my resume, and any other information that you think would be helpful. Thanks so much and I look forward to talking with you soon. Best, Polite Q. Courteous *Be Informative: In the best of cases, you will be asking a professor to write for you who knows you and your work well. But, in reality, this is not always possible. Perhaps you went to a large school where it was difficult to get to know faculty, or perhaps college has been in the rearview mirror for a while now and you fear your

instructor will not remember you. The best thing you can do in this situation is to be upfront about this fact when you ask. Here is an example: Dear Professor Itsbeenawhile, I had the opportunity to take your course Totally Insane Italian Poets in the fall of 2009. Im not sure if you remember me, since it has been a while, but I very much enjoyed your class and enjoyed working on the final paper I wrote for it which was on __________. In fact, many of the ideas from that class have contributed to my desire to apply to graduate school, which I am doing now. I wonder if you would be willing to write a letter of recommendation for me to MA/PhD/law school? I would be happy to send you any material that you think would be helpful and look forward to filling you in on what I have been up to for the past few years. Sincerely, The Girl From the Fifth Row Need more advice? Stumped on who would make the best recommender? Terrified to hit send because you fear rejection? We can help! Lets talk.

Last week we focused on how to ask for grad school letters of recommendation from faculty members, whether you are a recent student or a student from years gone-by. Today, wed like to focus on a scenario that no one ever really wants to face when they are asking for letters of recommendation: Being turned down.

Lets face it, whether in the dating, the professional, or the academic world, being turned down pleases almost no one. However, you didnt crawl under a rock and stop dating after being dumped by your first love (Ouch. Too soon?), and similarly, just because a recommender says no doesnt mean you should give up on the whole endeavor. Here are some reasons why someone may turn you down, followed by some reasons why that might just be a very good thing and some classy responses to these potentially awkward situations. I just dont have enough time. Time, she is a harsh mistress, it is true. Perhaps you waited till the last minute, or perhaps your professor has a new set of infant twins to take care of, or perhaps she is

under a vicious publication deadline. Whatever the reason is, if your professor has said that he or she does not have time to work on a letter for you, it is probably a good thing that they are not writing for you! Why? Your letters need to be thoughtful and engaging not hurried and sloppy. Thank your faculty member for the consideration anyway. Who knows? Maybe they can come through next time but only if you respond in a non-jerky way. Here is an example of a polite, classy response to a not enough time turndown via email: Dear Professor Sobusy, Thanks so much for replying to my email. Im sorry to hear that you wont be able to write me a letter this time around, but I appreciate your response. I wish you all the best with your new baby/book project/etc. Sincerely, Snubbed I dont feel that I can write you a letter you will be happy with. Now this one really stings. What does it mean? Well, it could mean that your professor doesnt remember you well enough to feel that he or she can be a good judge of your character/work/future potential in the field. Or, it could be a nice way of saying If I write you a letter it will be bad because of X,Y,or Z reason having to do with your performance in my class. You may be tempted to keep asking this same person, but uh, please dont. As we said before, your letters really need to be strong endorsements. A weak, unspecific, or just plain BAD letter about you will not help your case and will likely harm your case -no matter how famous/special/cutting edge this faculty member is. Heres how to respond: Hi Dr. Notafan, Im disappointed that I wont be able to have a letter from you in support of my application to graduate school, but I appreciate your candid response to my request. [Optional: I dont mean to put you in an awkward position, but I wonder if you might take a moment and explain to me what it is about my time in your class that gives you pause about recommending me. I ask not to try to convince you to write for me, only so that I can learn from any mistakes I have made in the past going forward.] I wish you all the best for a great semester. Sincerely, Snubbed II

Do you have any letter of rec conundrums? Horror stories? Tales of triumph? Advice to share? As usual, we are all ears!