The Thin Line Eric A. Schmidt Published by Eric A. Schmidt at Smashwords Copyright @ 2012 Eric A.

Schmidt Than you !or downloading this !ree eboo . Although this is a !ree boo " it remains the copyrighted property o! the author" and may not be reproduced" copied and distributed !or commercial or non#commercial purposes. $! you en%oyed this boo " please encourage your !riends to download their own copy at Smashwords.com" where they can also disco&er other wor s by this author. Than you !or your support.

A phone call wo e him be!ore the alarm on his cell phone" programmed !or '()0 am" went o!!. *e was rather annoyed with the noise that was clearly cheating him o! sleep and he groaned when he rolled o&er to silence the harsh" mechanical bu++ing. E&ery minute o! rest was precious to him. ,-mh.hello/0 ,1h my 2od3 $4m so sorry. $ thought you4d be awa e. 5ou usually get up at '(00.0 The &oice on the other end o! the line was high#pitched and s6uea y. ,-mm.it4s o ay. $4m up. 7hat4s up" sweetie/0 ,8othing" but $ %ust now you and $ will be in class all day today so $ was worried about calling at a di!!erent time. $ %ust wanted to con!irm our plans !or tonight.0 ,Tonight/0 ,5es" remember/ 5ou said that you were going to ta e me out to that new $talian place that %ust opened up o!! campus. 9on4t you remember/ 7e tal ed about it yesterday a!ternoon. 5ou promised30 The slight whine in her &oice made him cringe. *e instincti&ely !elt guilty !or not being around enough !or her. *e did remember that was supposed to ta e her out to dinner. :ut tonight was also the night he was supposed to !inish his lab !or 6uantum mechanics. *e sighed to himsel! %ust 6uietly enough to not be heard o&er the phone. A promise is a promise. ,$ do.0 *e !inally said" ,$4m happy to go with you. 7hat time/0 ,$s ; o4cloc o ay/0 ,Per!ect. $4ll swing by your dorm and we4ll wal o&er together. $4ll see you then.0 ,2reat30

*e hung up the phone and tried to gather enough energy to wrest himsel! !rom the warmth o! his blan et. *is legs !lung themsel&es hea&ily o&er the side o! the bed and he willed himsel! to sit up. *is eyes were still closed and he breathed deeply. The room he was sleeping in was absolutely spotless. E&erything was dusted and organi+ed. *is clothes were all put away and his te<tboo s were categori+ed by sub%ect and then placed in alphabetical order within the respecti&e sub%ects. *e stood up and stretched his arms into the air and then he bent down to touch his toes. There wasn4t an ounce o! !at on his body and his muscles and limbs resembled a limber %ungle cat. The well#de!ined 6uads and biceps rippled with the e!!ort o! the early morning stretch. *e was wearing only a digital watch" which had a se&ere tan line underneath it. A!ter pulling on a pair o! bo<ers" retrie&ed !rom a drawer with se&en other per!ectly !olded bo<er shorts o! the same blue hue" he reached !or the ground again and did 100 pushups and 200 sit#ups. *e grunted only minimally during the e!!ort. 1nce this ritual was completed he wal ed out o! the room with a slight glisten o! sweat on his bac and proceeded to bound down the stairwell. *is legs were tight and seemed to ha&e a nagging" lingering tiredness in them. The house he li&ed in was an old home that always had been occupied by young college men who ne&er too good care o! it. $t was probably built in the 1=>0s and it always appeared as i! a party had %ust been held there. :eer cans perpetually littered the bac yard and dri&eway and the li&ing room smelled o! moldy cheese and burnt toast. There were !our other bedrooms in the house aside !rom his. They were all in shambles? clothes co&ered the !loors" beds were unmade" and hal!#eaten !ood was always present on their des s. E<cept !or his. A!ter reaching the itchen" he promptly tidied up the mess. A!ter 20 minutes o! !astidious cleaning the space was re&i&ed into a useable state once again. 8e<t came brea !ast" which consisted o! a bowl o! cereal. *e measured out e<actly one cup o! shredded wheat" poured it into a bowl and !ollowed that with one cup o! s im mil . A glass o! orange %uice" also e<actly one cup" was included along with a banana. 7hile eating he went through the mail and proceeded to pay the bills !or the house" as it was nearing the end o! the month. *e methodically went through each payment and wrote out chec s !or the respecti&e amounts that were due. *is hand writing was !lawless and could4&e stood in !or a type !ont. The bills were mailed out" the payments were recorded" and then he 6uic ly pulled on athletic shorts and snea ers and bolted out the door" sans shirt. $t was @0 degrees and sunny. *is brown hair" which was getting a little long" bounced carelessly as he plodded along. *e started his stopwatch the second he began running. 7hat started as a slow trot soon turned into a !ull#blown" 10mph run. Suddenly" someone %umped along ne<t to him and began matching him stride !or stride. This newcomer4s une<pected presence caused him to %ump but he soon recogni+ed the company and regained his composure. ,*ey" whatsup" man/0 The newcomer cheer!ully as ed. ,*ey 9an0" he said. ,5ou startled me. $ didn4t thin you4d be coming today.0 9an" the newcomer" was taller and had a head o! handsome" wa&y" %et blac hair along with a slee %aw line. 9an was leaner but somehow also more muscular. ,*ey" you now me0" said 9an" ,$4m always around" especially to %oin you !or a run. $ saw you !rom the 6uad and $ !igured $ would tag along. $ %ust got started too.0 *e seemed &ery com!ortable with the pace.

,Cool" glad to ha&e you along.0 *e gritted his teeth and accelerated. The ne<t se&eral miles passed mostly in silence with only the occasional inter%ection o! pleasant chit chat. The two had amped up their pace considerably. 9an tried to eep the con&ersation going in a &ain attempt to mas the !act that the two were beginning to race each other. ,So what ind o! mileage are you wor ing on now/0 *is chest was beginning to labor to bring in enough o<ygen. *e tried to gauge 9an4s breathing to see i! their inhalations were comparable" ,$.am.wor ing.on a 100 miles a wee now.0 ,7ow" $ don4t thin anyone else on the team is doing that sort o! a load. $4m getting close though. This wee will be =A.0 ,7hew.yea.well.we4ll.see.how it goes.0 ,So" how many you planning to do today/0 *is panting was growing hea&y and noticeable" although when he spo e he tried to &eil it" ,1> !or this morning. 7e4&e already done '. So" ' more and $4ll call it a day.whew.0 9an was still breathing through his nostrils and sounded &ery in control. The pair grew silent as they cruised down the 6uiet roads. $t was autumn and the lea&es were beginning to change color and dri!t to the earth. The dried lea&es on the road ga&e an audible crunch when they ran o&er them. The two athletes !lew down the streets through tran6uil suburban neighborhoods. Biewing the pair !rom the side ga&e the impression o! a %umble o! swi!tly rotating lower limbs that appeared in danger o! tangling and !orming a not. Their arms were churning as rapidly as the carbines o! a steam locomoti&e and their breathing was as loud as the roar o! a combustion engine. The tangents o! the turns were ta en more and more tightly with each passing meter and be!ore long the two were all#out racing. Their e<plosi&e yet elegant energy blasted away the serenity o! the 6uiet morning. *e struc out and accelerated with the hope o! dropping 9an. 9an came bac though and held the lead !or 1A seconds be!ore dropping bac again. $t was as i! they were loc ed in a bo<ing match o! surges and accelerations. Each punch was gradually grinding them down. 8either runner was showing a sign o! gi&ing in though. Their eyes burned with !erocity. 9an ept staring straight ahead. They blew by an elderly cyclist and were now ta ing the turns so tightly that they almost noc ed o&er two di!!erent mailbo<es. Cinally" the !inish was in sight. There was nothing le!t to hold bac . :oth were in an all#out sprint. They saw nothing but a tunneled &ision to the !inish. Each step was 6uic er than the last and each runner !ound it within himsel! to accelerate %ust a little more. 9an put his head down and somehow" !rom somewhere" he dug out one last !inal ic and brought the race to a !inish %ust a second ahead o! his teammate. 9an ept %ogging but his teammate immediately stopped to grab his nees. *e swayed li e a tower in the wind. Cor a moment" he thought he would pass out. *is head !elt hea&y and his legs seemed to be !illed with wet" burning sand. *e couldn4t !eel his arms and his tongue had the sharp taste o! copper on it. The two shared a hand slap as he stood bent o&er in !ront o! his old" run#down house. *e staggered as he straightened his bac . ,$.don4t. now.how.you.do.it.9an. That was some !ine running.0 *is breath was hea&y.

,5ea...tell me about it.you4re getting me into really good shape. 5ou4ll be ready !or the Con!erence -eet this wee end0" said 9an. ,5ea" wow. $ don4t now how you always do it. Always a step ahead o! me.0 ,Eh" you4ll catch me one day.0 9an smiled" play!ully punched him in the shoulder be!ore %ogging o!! !or a cool down. *e stared as 9an trotted away" wist!ully sha ing his head in admiration. A!ter catching his breath" he dragged himsel! bac into the house. *e showered" changed and grabbed a mountain o! te<tboo s !or class. *e brushed his teeth !or e<actly two minutes D the time recommended by the American 9ental Association. *e also brushed his hair" the length o! which was beginning to worry him. Twenty#!i&e stro es e<actly. Anymore and he new it wouldn4t loo as good. *ygiene is important to him. $t4s the sign o! well#maintained li!e. *e was e<periencing a post#e<ercise euphoria and was !eeling incredibly than !ul. *e was so luc y that he new 9an. 9an li ed e&erything that he li ed. They shared interests and they made each other better at them. $t4s the per!ect symbiosis" he thought. Eust as long as he was able to eep up with 9an. *e wal ed to the bac o! the house and a &oice !rom the itchen startled him as he headed out the door at =(00 am !or his =(20 am class. 1ne o! his housemates was eating brea !ast. ,*ey man" how was your run this morning/0 *e couldn4t help but cringe as he noticed his housemate spilling mil o&er the counter while spooning a horridly saccharine cereal concoction into his mouth. ,2ood" good. $ had 9an pushing me again. id4s a great training partner.0 ,5ea" he sounds li e a hellu&a athlete. 5ou going to class already/0 *is housemate was still hal! asleep and was slightly slurring his words. The id was !alling behind in classes and would probably ha&e to stay on !or another semester. *e didn4t understand how someone could be so unmoti&ated. A tingle o! resentment was drowned out by pity. ,5ea" $ li e to get there a little early because $ always try to grab a seat in the !ront row. Pre!erably the same one.0 *is housemate laughed" ,All right man" well don4t wor yoursel! too hard. $4ll see you later.0 ,Peace.0 *e wal ed to class and calculated his splits and mile pace !or his run that morning. $t was !ast. That was good. *e would do well at Con!erences. 8e<t" he mapped out his itinerary !or the day. *e suddenly remembered that he had a meeting !or the newspaper at >(10 pm. *e !rantically grabbed his planner !rom his boo bag and %otted this down. An uneasy sense o! !orget!ulness %olted through his spine. $t made him !eel dread!ul and an<ious. 7hat else had he !orgotten/ *e was already !eeling worried about the lab that he needed to complete !or tonight before his date at ;pm. There %ust aren4t enough hours. *e arri&ed at his lecture and 6uic ly re&iewed his to#do list. 8othing else seemed to be out o! order. *e breathed a sigh o! relie! and prepared his notes !or class. *e too his seat" beating the ne<t student to the lecture hall by a !ull !i&e minutes.

All throughout class he !rantically wrote down notes. *e %otted down diagrams and re!erenced bac to the te<t multiple times. -ost other students didn4t e&en bother bringing the te<t. The pro!essor was droning on about a !ormula that they were all supposed to now. *e as ed a 6uestion to the hal!#comatose hall. Cric ets. The 6uery caused him to !lip through his notes to try to !ind some hint o! what the answer might be. Cinally" the pro!essor ga&e up and told them. FShit34 *e thought to himsel!. *e new that answer" but he hadn4t been sure enough to raise his hand. Another 6uestion was posed to the class. This time he new what it was. *e had done e<tra wor last night and had already wor ed on the speci!ic problem that was now being re!erenced. And he had chec ed his answer with the boo last night. Cautiously" he raised his hand. The pro!essor4s eyes lit up with the sight o! an engaged student" ,5es3/0 ,G e6uals negati&e twenty three point !our se&en/0 ,5es3 Bery good3 8ow" let4s see how we got that.0 *e sighed a huge breath o! relie!. Class let out two minutes late. *e new this because he always allotted himsel! 10 minutes to get to the campus ca!H !or co!!ee. $! he arri&ed late then a line o! at least !our people would be in !ront o! him. This delay would lead to an additional 2 minutes being tac ed on to the 1I; o! a mile wal to his ne<t class. And that time would compound itsel! !urther as the day progressed. This was simply unacceptable to him and his &ery tight schedule. The day passed and he made up !or his lost time by %ogging to the rest o! his classes. *e was angry with himsel! !or being distracted during his newspaper meeting at > pm. *e couldn4t stop thin ing about 9an. *ow was he so !ast/ *is mind raced bac to that morning and all he saw were 9an4s strong" thin legs !lashing in !ront o! him. F7hat an athlete.4 he thought to himsel!. :ac at the house that e&ening he wor ed diligently on his lab. $t needed to be done that night. Tomorrow was reser&ed !or a test re&iew. 8o minute could by go unaccounted !or. *is phone intermittently bu++ed to alert him o! a call. 8ow he was slightly annoyed. 7ho would be bothering him/ *e had a lab to !inish !or christsa es. ,*ey" where are you/0 ,Jh.0 $t was his girl!riend. *e had !orgotten about dinner and was now late. ,$4m waiting outside my dorm.waiting !or you and !eeling li e an idiot. 7e4re going to lose our reser&ation i! you don4t get o&er here soon.0 ,Jh.0 ,Eust get o&er here" o ay/0 ,1 ay.0 9an had once told him that there are three ma%or aspects to college li!e? academics" athletics and social stu!!" and most people can only really e<cel at two o! those !or a sustainable period o! time. *e groaned to himsel!. *e !elt guilty" tired" and o&erloaded. *ow is it that 9an always seemed to be batting three !or three when he !elt li e he could barely manage one/ They got to the restaurant %ust in time. *is girl!riend wasn4t pleased.

,5ou now" you4re unbelie&able sometimes. $ was waiting !or li e 20 minutes. $ mean" $ e&en called you this morning to remind you. $ went out o! my way to call you this morning so that $ wouldn4t interrupt your class schedule Fcause $ now how serious you are about it. 5ou now" $ didn4t ha&e class until =(20 but $ still got up early to call you to con!irm. *onestly" $ !eel li e $4m the only one wor ing at this and that $4m li e not a priority at all !or you.0 ,$4m sorry" you4re right. $ need to be better !or you.0 *e loo ed down sheepishly. ,$ %ust don4t understand it. 5ou4re so absentminded o! my needs" yet you4re so on top o! e&erything else. $ won4t buy it. $ won4t buy that you %ust can4t remember. $ see how well you manage your time otherwise. 5ou4re %ust telling me right now that $4m not a priority !or you.0 ,$4m sorry0. $t4s all he could say. *e did !eel genuinely sorry but he also !elt pressured and a little pee&ed. *e wasn4t sorry that he concentrated more on his studies but he was sorry that things were the way that they were. *e was sorry that he wasn4t more li e 9an. *e new he had to !ocus on running and his schoolwor . *e couldn4t a!!ord to sacri!ice either o! those !or the third Fli!e dimension4" e&en i! it wasn4t !air to her. $nade6uacy haunted him. She was a sweet girl and he new that he didn4t deser&e her because he didn4t treat her well enough but at the same time he !elt a little angry at her !or not understanding %ust how seriously he too the !irst two li!e dimensions. She sighed hea&ily" ,$t4s o ay. Ket4s %ust try to ha&e a nice dinner" o ay/0 ,1 ay.0 They ordered their !ood and made small tal . The !oul mood gradually dissipated. They discussed her courses and his courses and his running. :oth o! them cheered up once their !ood arri&ed and they started eating. *e was especially hungry. *e hadn4t eaten lunch because he had been wor ing in the library and proceeded to lose trac o! time. 7hen he did remember to eat his !ood choices were 6uite spartan. *e loo ed wist!ully at her spaghetti and meatballs as he washed down his !irst bite o! eggplant parmesan D ser&ed without breadcrumbs or a side pasta D with a sip o! ice water. She had a bubbly soda that he ept eyeing hungrily. *e couldn4t a!!ord to put on e<tra weight. ,5ou now" you4re wor ing yoursel! too hard0" she told him and she slurped up a loose strain o! spaghetti. ,$ now.0 ,7hy are you doing this to yoursel!/ 5ou4re going to go cra+y i! you try to eep going at the pace you4re at now.0 ,$ ha&e to do the best $ can at whate&er $4m doing.0 ,5ou sound li e a 8i e slogan. C4mon" seriously" why are you so anal all the time/ $t4s good to wor hard but the way you do it is sometimes scary. $t4s li e you4re a robot.0 *e paused and glanced around the restaurant and counted the number o! chairs and tables" ,$ don4t now. $4&e always been a hard wor er. $ need to do well in school because $ want to ha&e a good %ob when $ graduate.0 She too his hand" ,*ey" listen to me. 5ou4re not your 9ad" o ay/ 5ou4re going to be &ery success!ul. $ mean" you4re a chemical engineering ma%or. That4s phenomenal. 5ou4re going to do &ery well !or yoursel!. $ now your childhood was tough with your 9ad always being away

at sales e&ents trying to pawn o!! his latest in&ention and stu!! but you turned out %ust !ine" and you4re not going to ha&e to go through that again. :elie&e me" you could do hal! o! what you4re doing now and still do much better than that.0 *e loo ed at his hal!#eaten meal" ,$ guess $ %ust don4t want anything holding me bac 0" his &oice was strained and monotone. ,Especially me0" he added 6uietly. *e !elt uncom!ortable tal ing about his li!e choices. They were instincts to him. *e trusted them because wor ing hard %ust !elt right. $t !elt weird e<plaining it. ,$ now0" she said so!tly. She stro ed his hand. ,So" lemme as you something else.0 ,1 ay.0 ,7ould you run e&en i! it wasn4t paying !or school/0 *e pondered the 6uestion !or a moment. ,5ea" $ would.0 ,*ow come/0 ,$ don4t now. $ %ust lo&e it. $ lo&e the science o! it. $t4s e<act but at the same time it4s a release.it4s thrilling. $t allows you to test what you are capable o!. $t doesn4t lie. $t only shows. $t4s.per!ect.0 *e paused and thought be!ore choosing this last word. *is &oice %umped !rom monotone to animated as he spo e o! the sport he lo&ed. She li ed seeing him get e<cited. There was a lull in the con&ersation !or a moment. ,5ou now0" he continued" ,$ was reading about shar s the other day.0 ,1h/ 7hat about/0 She smiled" put her chin in her hand and loo ed at him. ,$ read how certain shar s can4t breathe D can4t get water to pass o&er their gills correctly D unless they eep mo&ing. They always ha&e to mo&e %ust to stay ali&e. $ %ust thought that4s so interesting. Could you imagine such a thing/0 ,$t sounds ind o! stress!ul.0 ,$ don4t now. $ thin it sort o! ma es sense. $t4s li e the shar is ne&er still. $t4s li e it4s always mo&ing toward something better.0 ,-aybe. :ut $ don4t thin the shar thin s that way.0 She laughed play!ully and he couldn4t help but notice the &ery attracti&e contours o! her !ace that were accentuated by the !lic ering candlelight. ,-aybe.0 And his eyes dri!ted o!! toward the cloc on the opposite wall. LLLL Sti!!. That was how he !elt e&ery morning. Especially his legs and especially today. They !elt li e the ancient trun s o! some gnarled oa trees. $t was ' am and he was already awa e. *e was desperately trying to !inish the assignment that had been put o!! last night because o! his dinner date. *e managed to cram in )0 minutes o! wor be!ore heading out the door !or his daily run. 9an ran into him again a!ter he was a mile into it. 9an loo ed li e he had had 10 hours o! sleep last night" which certainly contrasted with the hea&y bags under his own weary eyes. Somehow 9an always acted and loo ed as i! he was operating on 10 hours o! sleep. 7here did he !ind the time/

,So" how was dinner with the lady !riend/0 ,2ood. 8ice. Mela<ing.0 ,9id you get a chance to !inish up that lab report/0 ,Jh.no.still wor ing on it. Almost done though.0 ,1h" bummer" dude. $ !inished it last night. $! you want" $ was going to wor on the homewor !or tonight in the library a!ter we !inish up our run. 7anna %oin me/0 ,1 ay.0 As they were running they passed a be&y o! deer. The animals warily watched the athletes cruise by them !rom the side o! the road. There was a young !ather with short antlers standing protecti&ely astride his doe with their two little bambies. ,They are pretty ama+ing creatures" aren4t they/ Ki e" elegant when they run. And so !ast too.0 9an replied" ,-mm" yep.0 ,$ had a dream the other night about being a deer0" he said thought!ully. ,1h yea/0 replied a curious 9an. ,5ea" it was ama+ing. $ was in a race. $t was the last lap o! a mile race and suddenly $ loo ed down and saw that $ had sprung two more legs and that they were deer legs. $ was trans!ormed into a deer" li e a mammalian &ersion o! Caust4s F-etamorphosis4. ,That was Na! a0" 9an corrected him. ,1h" right" well whate&er. Anyway" $ turned into a deer and ran home li e the wind.all the way to the line uncontested. $ beat e&eryone by 100 meters. $t was ama+ing. $ !elt li e a natural born runner. $t.$.!elt per!ect.0 ,Sound cool" man0" 9an replied. Then he accelerated. *is companion struggled to match his stride. *e and 9an went to the library a!ter running %ust as they said they would to wor on the homewor !or the !ollowing night. *e would %ust ha&e to wor on the lab assignment a!terwards" although he was rather worried. *e desperately needed his sleep !or Criday. That was the day o! Con!erences and he new it would be tough to be properly rested because he was going to ha&e to stay up late on Thursday night to !inish the lab" which had to be emailed in on Criday morning at the latest. *e was getting an<ious. *e !elt li e he was losing control o! the house o! cards that he saw as his li!e. The to#do list simply grew longer and time simply grew shorter and shorter. They wor ed in the library !or 1 hour and )' minutes. *is watch ne&er lied and he chec ed his watch &ery o!ten. *e also eyed 9an with en&y during that time. *ow was it that 9an was so good at calculus/ *ow was he so good at e&erything !or that matter/ *is 2PA was ).='. 9an4s was a >.0. 7hile he was wor ing through a rather di!!icult problem" which 9an had bree+ed through and was currently trying in &ain to e<plain" his phone bu++ed intermittently again. $t was his girl!riend. ,*ey.0

,*ey.0 ,*ow are you/0 ,1 ay.0 ,7hatchu up to/0 ,$4m at the library.0 ,1h" $4m sorry. $ don4t mean to bother you.0 ,8o" it4s o ay. $4m here with 9an. 7e4re wor ing on our homewor .0 ,1h" that4s good.0 ,5ea.0 ,$ don4t thin $4&e met 9an yet.0 ,Meally/ 1h" $ should de!initely introduce you guys. 9an runs too. *e %oined the team last semester when $ was sic . 7e run together a lot. *e is really talented.0 ,8o" $ now. 5ou tal about him a lot.0 ,1h0" he paused and loo ed at 9an who was still buried in his boo . ,5ea" sometime it4d be nice to meet him.0 ,1 ay.0 ,1 ay" well $ better let you go.0 ,1 ay.0 ,Ko&e you.0 ,5ea" lo&e you too.0 ,:ye.0 ,:ye.0 9an loo ed up !rom his te<tboo . ,5ou should introduce us" man. She seems li e a really nice girl.0 ,5ea" $ can4t belie&e you ha&en4t met. $ mean you4re my best !riend and it4s important !or girl!riends and best !riends to meet.0 ,Absolutely. 9o you thin she4ll li e me/0 ,$ hope so. $ wouldn4t want something coming in between us. $ &alue our !riendship.0 9an smiled" ,Than s man. $ appreciate it.0 They went bac to wor . ,7ait" 9an. Are you sure this number is right/0 ,5ep.0 ,1h. 1 ay.0

The ne<t day was rough !or him. The lab assignment that was hanging o&er him !inally came to a head and he had to stay up 6uite late to !inish it. Ouite late !or him was 1(00 am. $deally his usual bedtime was 10 pm. Sleep was a precious commodity. Sleep was time and time was the most important commodity. Sleep cost a lot o! time. The constant struggle o! his li!e was balance. *e needed his rest" mostly because o! his running" and he tried to always get = hours. 8ine hours is nine hours no matter how you cut it. That only lea&es 1A hours !or the rest o! day. Some people work 1A hours a day. *e thought o! these people and then he thought about how small he !elt compared to them. There was always wor he was trying to !inish. Sometimes he !elt li e he was hanging onto a cli!! with his !ingers gradually slipping out. The control o! his li!e appeared absolute to e&eryone but himsel!. *e was always tired and always had the !eeling o! sprinting %ust to eep up with the ground beneath him" li e some nightmarish treadmill. *e hated treadmills. They !rustrated him. 8ot going anywhere when he ran made him !eel li e his run accomplished nothing. That made him an<ious. At 1(00 am he hit Fsa&e4 on his computer and emailed the accursed lab to his pro!essor. The late night came at the worst possible time !or him. The Con!erence meet was tomorrow D technically later that day. This was a race that he had been preparing !or o&er the last year. *is coach new he was in shape" his teammates new he was in shape. 9an new he was in shape" but he also new that 9an was in better shape. This made him !eel li e he wasn4t as ready !or tomorrow as he should be. A!ter !i&e hours o! sleep he awo e on the day o! the most important race o! his college career so !ar !eeling &ery tired. $t was a rainy" miserable day. Cold" gray and windy. The course would be grassy and muddy. Tra&eling to the race" he sat in the bac o! the bus in the same seat he always sat in" away !rom his teammates. The stench o! diesel pumping out o! the idling engine made him nauseous. 7hen it came time !or his race he sat up" stretched" and pulled on his spi es and !lats. *is weapons. *e toed the line and high#!i&ed his teammates. *is s in was co&ered with goose bumps and cold rain. The !ield was hushed. Koo ing down the line he saw 100 other tense bodies" eager to be set loose. *is breathing grew shallow and intense. *e gripped his hands into !ists and loo ed at the dar s y abo&e him. Cinally" the starting gun snapped the athletes out o! the pre#race tension li e a bro en guitar string. *undreds o! legs !lashed up and down and rapidly churned the course into a muddy ri&er. The !lashy and brightly colored %erseys o! the runners !lew by and pro&ided the only source o! color that was not green" brown or grey. A!ter !i!teen minutes o! racing he was in Ath place and 6uic ly mo&ing up. Suddenly" his !atigued ga+e !ell upon a spectator wearing %eans on the side o! the course. The bystander was leaning against a tree with one leg bent at the nee and with his hands in his poc ets. $t was 9an. There was no cheer or loud encouragement coming !rom his mouth. Mather" he merely glared at him as he ran by and when he got close enough" 9an 6uietly said to him" ,C4mon" $ now you4re better than this.0 *e gritted his teeth and dug down to le&els o! pain that caused his 6uads to scream with e&ery step and his lungs to burn with each breath. *is arms !elt li e they were !illed with battery acid. *is heart and chest were on the &erge o! bursting. :e!ore the !inish line" he mo&ed up two more

spots !or a podium !inish. At the end" he threw himsel! o&er the line and landed in a shallow pool o! cool mud. $t !elt di&ine against his radiating s in. *e was utterly spent and laid in the mud desperately trying to stabili+e the o<ygen and C12 ratio in his body. Mace o!!icials pic ed him up by the armpits and brought him to the medical tent. *is cal! had been badly spi ed by another runner4s shoe and was now bleeding pro!usely. *is blood sugar was also dangerously low. There hadn4t been enough time to eat a proper brea !ast in the morning because he didn4t want to be late to the bus. $t was a new personal best time !or him and it was the best he had e&er placed at this meet. *owe&er" there was nothing but a sense o! relie!. 8ot happiness. Eust relie!. A!ter he was released by the medical sta!!" gi&en his medal and congratulated by his teammates" he slowly shu!!led into a mee %og to cool down. Cor a !ew serene moments the calm and 6uiet o! the cooldown routine" away !rom e&eryone else" pro&ided a sense o! !reedom !rom the stress he had been !eeling on campus D a moment %ust to himsel! and his thoughts. A!ter !i&e minutes o! %ogging alone though" 9an !ound and %oined him. *e had changed !rom his %eans into a pair o! athletic shorts. ,8ice run" man. 5ou did pretty good things today.0 ,Than s" 9an. $ saw you on the course.0 ,5ea" you weren4t mo&ing too good at that point. Although $ new that you would be !altering at that point on the course. -ost people do. 5ou did last year. $ don4t now i! it was so much because you sped up or the two guys in !ront o! you slowed down. Either way though" it was well#e<ecuted. Third place is solid. 2ood racing" e&en i! you weren4t the most strong $4&e seen you.0 ,Than s !or cheering me on. $ appreciate it.0 ,Anytime" man. 8e<t year $ bet you4ll win this meet.0 The two e<changed smiles. ,9an" $ thought you would be racing today. $ thought $4d get a chance to compete with you.0 9an grinned sheepishly" ,8ah" man. $ got bumped to Sectionals. Coach thought $ would be better used there than here.0 Sectionals was a more elite e&ent. *e hadn4t been in&ited to go. -aybe ne<t year he would go" depending on how much his coach &alued his per!ormance !rom today. Third at Con!erences was pretty good" but there was a lot o! other talent on the team. ,7ell" good luc there. $4ll be sure to come watch and cheer you on.0 ,Than s" man.0 They %ogged on !or another two miles. 9an slowly escalated the speed o! the cool down until they were really mo&ing by the last 6uarter mile. *e had tried to get schoolwor done on the bus. *e opened his calculus boo and promptly !ell asleep in it. *e wo e up an hour later in a panic. They were bac at school and he had wasted an hour o! time. *e had dreamt that he was dri&ing and that he had spun o!! the road and into a ra&ine. The !alling sensation %olted him awa e. *is s in was co&ered in a cold sweat. *e !elt balmy" cold and ill. The bus par ed and he sprinted to the library to catch up on his wor . *e turned o!! his cell phone. 8o time !or distractions.

*e settled into his !a&orite spot in the library and %ust as he was beginning to sense a good rhythm o! producti&ity emerge" 9an !lopped himsel! down in !ront o! him. ,5ou still wor ing on this/ $ thought you !inished it up last night. That4s when $ did it.0 ,5ea" $ didn4t ha&e time. 9inner too too long.0 ,5ou wanna loo at mine/0 ,8o" $4m o ay. $ can get it done on my own. $ need to learn this.0 ,7ell" suit yoursel!. $4m going to grab dinner. 5ou want something/ 5ou loo li e you could use it.0 ,8o" no. $ don4t ha&e time. $4ll catch up with you later. And i! not" $4ll see you tomorrow morning !or our run.0 *e ept staring into his boo . ,Sounds good. $4ll see you then.0 A!ternoon became e&ening and e&ening grew into a dar night. *is stomach growled with angry and demanding pangs. *e grew upset with himsel!. *e thought" Fwhy are you so wea / Stop complaining and $4ll !eed you soon. $ need to !inish this problem. $ %ust ha&e to get his damned lab done with.4 1ne by one" e&ery other student le!t the library. The building closed at 2 am and the librarian went o&er to him to gently remind him that the library hours were o&er. 7hen she touched his shoulder he %umped. *e had been listening to music and hadn4t heard her approach. *is !ace was !right!ully pale and the librarian was startled by his dishe&eled appearance. *e was snee+ing" coughing and whee+ing. ,Are you all right" dear/0 ,$4m !ine. Sorry" $ didn4t mean to eep you here until this late.0 ,$t4s all right" dear. $4m supposed to be here until now anyways. Are you sure you4re all right/ 5ou loo pretty clammy.0 ,5es" $4m !ine.0 She helped him stand up and gather his scattered boo s. *e was staggering and bent o&er. She held his arm and escorted him to the !ront door. ,Try and get some rest" dear. 5ou loo li e you4re really coming down with something aw!ul.0 *e opened his mouth to respond but no words came out. The cold bree+e !rom outside blew o&er his !ace and cause him to shi&er. *is eyes rolled bac into his head and his &ision went blac . :e!ore he new it" he was on the ground and he had pulled the librarian down with him. She started screaming. ,1h my3 Are you all right" dear/3 8ancy30 She called bac into the library" ,8ancy3 Call someone3 This boy is &ery sic .0 *e lay on the pa&ement" shi&ering and murmuring to himsel!" ,Third place.trying to run li e a deer. LLLL

*e wo e up in a bright" white room 11 hours later. The smell o! hospitals always made him s6ueamish. $t reminded him o! sic " mee people. Sic people always !rea ed him out. *e was only &aguely aware o! the !act that he had recently %oined their ran s. A nurse and resident doctor were tal ing 6uietly near the doorway. ,*e4s a model student0" the nurse said" ,A bunch o! his !riends came by earlier and they were singing his praises. They were mostly nice young men !rom the school4s trac team. They told me that he came in third place in a big race yesterday. *e4s apparently been wor ing himsel! &ery hard. 1ne o! the boys told me that he had been spending all o! his !ree time in the library and hasn4t e&en ta en the time to brea !or meals.0 ,7ell" that would e<plain his &ery low blood sugar0" the resident said. *e was hoo ed up to an intra&enous drip. ,5up" and all that wor had him thrown into a !e&er. *is temperature was ho&ering around a hundred and two !or a !ew hours last night. $t4s since come bac down.0 ,$ see. 7ell" he loo s li e he4s wa ing up now. $4ll !ill him in.0 ,5es" 9r. Eohnson.0 The nurse4s shoes tapped all the way down the linoleum hallway. *e blin ed his eyes hea&ily and stared at the wall in !ront o! him. *is &ision was blurry and his head hurt !rom where it hit the pa&ement. 9r. Eohnson came o&er to his bedside and !lipped through his chart. ,And how are we !eeling today/0 ,-mm.all right. 7hat happened/0 ,5ou wor ed yoursel! into a !it. 5our blood sugar plummeted because you didn4t eat anything a!ter that big run you had yesterday. That caused you to !aint last night and a !e&er set in soon a!ter that" probably because o! the stress that you4&e put yoursel! under by wor ing so hard.0 ,1h.0 *is &oice was disinterested and his eyes dri!ted toward the window where there was a cornucopia o! !lowers" gi!ts and get#well#soon cards all bas ing in the warming rays o! the sun. They were mostly !rom other members o! the team and his classmates. ,7hat4s all that/0 ,5ou4re !riends ha&e been stopping by all morning when they heard you were sic .0 *e ept staring at the gi!ts. *e simply couldn4t belie&e that all o! that was !or him. 7hat had he done to deser&e all o! that/ All he did was get sic . *e blin ed hea&ily again and tried to thin o! who would drop o!! cards !or him. They were obscure !aces o! !riends and teammates whom he saw e&eryday but ne&er really seemed to be in touch with. ,9id a id named 9an come by/0 ,Jh" $ don4t remember seeing that particular name on the sign#in" although you can chec with the nurse.0 9r. Eohnson cleared his throat" ,8ow" $ thin that you4ll be o ay to go home soon. 5our blood sugar stabili+ed and your !e&er dropped o!! a lot.0 *e loo ed at his watch and nearly %umped" ,1h %ee+" $ missed my meeting !or this morning30 ,And that reminds me" don4t o&erdo it. 7e4re going to release you but only under strict instructions to not undergo any seriously stress!ul acti&ities. That means ta ing it easy with the studying and ma e sure you ta e at least one !ull day o!! !rom the running and then ease bac

into it. Also" be sure to get a lot o! rest. And don4t !orget to eat again" o ay/ 5ou guys are wor ing yoursel&es too hard. $t4s a rat race e&en be!ore you graduate nowadays.0 ,1 .0 *e slowly nodded his head but he wasn4t really listening to these instructions he had no intention o! !ollowing. The doctor le!t and had the nurse remo&e his $B drip. *e lay in bed !or a !ew more minutes be!ore his ne<t &isitor came. ,7hat happened/30 *er shrill and worried &oice reached his ears be!ore she came into his periphery. She loo ed !lushed" as i! she had been running. *er hair was dishe&eled and her bag was open. $t was his girl!riend. ,5our bag is open0" he remar ed. ,Are you all right" sweetie/0 She nelt beside his bed and stro ed his !ace. ,5es" $4m !ine.0 ,5ou can4t do this to yoursel!3 7hat ha&e $ been telling you/ $ new something li e this was going to happen. 5ou %ust don4t ta e care o! yoursel!. This is li e what happened last semester. 1h" are you all right/0 ,$4m !ine.0 ,7hen you get out o! here $4m going to be sure to coo you dinner at night !rom now on. 8o more o! this not eating. $! you get any thinner you4re going to &anish.0 ,1 ay.0 ,$ heard about your race0" her !ace changed !rom an e<asperated loo to a small smile. ,2ood !or you" sweetie.0 ,Than s" $ can do better ne<t year though.0 ,1h" c4mon. 9on4t do that to yoursel!. 5ou did great. 5ou really did. E&eryone $ spo e to on the team was singing your praises. $t was a great race. 2i&e yoursel! that much at least. And $4m sure your lab turned out great too. :ut" hey0" she pulled his chin up toward her eyes" ,you gotta be more aware o! ta ing care o! yoursel!. 5ou4re going to get really sic ne<t time i! you don4t ta e it easy e&ery now and then. 5ou hear me/0 ,5es" you4re right.0 She sighed with the &ain hope that some o! her words had gotten through to him. ,$4m worried about you. Eust promise me that you4ll be care!ul and not wor too hard" o ay/0 ,$ promise.0 ,2ood.0 She loo ed at the now#remo&ed $B and cringed" ,7hy do you do this to yoursel!/0 she as ed 6uietly. *e thought !or a moment and loo ed up at her and suddenly !elt li e tal ing a little" ,$ always thin o! success as li e the !inish line o! any race. $t4s so small. $t4s %ust a little line o! white paint and sometimes the margin o! di!!erence between who gets o&er that line !irst can be %ust as small. :ut that line is still there. $ %ust always want to be on the right side o! that line. $ don4t want there to be any 6uestion o! where $ am in relation to that thin line. $ wanna be per!ect.

,7ell" no one can be per!ect.0 ,9oesn4t mean you shouldn4t try to get as close as you can to it.0 ,$ suppose.0 She bit her lower lip and held his hand. *er an<iety was palpable. ,5ou now" there4s also a thin line between per!ection.and other things too0" she said warningly. ,$ suppose0" he said. LLLL Although 9r. Eohnson had warned him against strenuous acti&ity" when he got out o! the hospital he !elt great" !antastic e&en. *e mostly attributed this to his innate strength as an athlete and only partially to the copious amounts o! sleep and glucose he recei&ed in the hospital. As he was sitting on his !ront porch he saw 9an wal ing in !ront o! his house. ,*ey 9an0" he sat up in his dec chair. *e had his chemistry boo on his lap. ,*ey" man. $ %ust wanted to stop by to see how you were doing. $ heard that you had a bit o! a slip up last night.0 ,5ea" the doctor said $ had a !e&er !rom o&erdoing it.0 ,:ummer" dude. 7e4ll $4m glad you4re !eeling better now. 5ou loo better.0 ,Than s" yea" it4s great to see you again. 7hat are you up to now/0 ,$ don4t now. $ was thin ing o! doing a !ew repeats on the trac .0 ,9o you mind i! $ %oin/0 ,5ou sure you4re up !or that/0 ,Absolutely. $ !eel great.0 ,1 ay" cool. $t4ll be good to ha&e the company.0 ,2reat30 The two %ogged up to the trac and warmed up. They %umped into the inter&als. They were running two laps hard and %ogging e&ery third. ,*ey.9an0" he panted a!ter their third inter&al. *e had been tailing 9an the whole time. 7hen he pointed this out 9an politely attributed it only to his recent hospitali+ation. ,5ea/0 ,Slow down" man. 7e were 10 seconds !ast there.0 9an loo ed bac and smir ed. ,C4mon" let4s see what we4re made o!.0 Suddenly" 9an too o!! on the !ourth repeat" cutting the rest short. Surprised" he yelled at him" ,5ou" bastard3 $4ll gi&e you a race30 *e smiled as he sprinted to catch him. As the duo peeled around the cur&e o! the trac !or their !ourth hal!#mile repeat" they passed two wal ers. They were middle#aged women wearing bright sweats loo ing to burn a !ew calories be!ore their ids hopped o!! the school bus. The one turned to the other and as ed" ,7ho is he tal ing to/0 ,$ ha&e no idea0" she replied as she stared at the single runner" doing lap" a!ter lap" a!ter lap.