Evaluation Question 3; FEEDBACK; I have here very detailed feedback from a student in my class, Phoebe, whos genre of music

is slightly different to mine.

Magazine Advertisement: In terms of the poster, I think that the photograph used is incredibly effective as it is of a high quality, well lit and presents the girl well. Within the Pop genre, artists own appearances are highly important and work as one of their main selling points- the use of a large midshot shows that you have acknowledged this and that you are well informed about conventions of the genre. The fact that the girl is making direct eye contact with the consumer is also an effective feature as it encourages viewers to feel that they have a more personal connection to the artist (also drawing the fans own eye in). Additionally, you have styled the artist well in accordance with your target market (adolescent girls) as she is dressed modestly and appears quite wholesome which won't intimidate fans. The use of minimal text on your poster also works well as it retains the focus on the image and keeps the design simple and clean cut. The composition of the overall poster is aided by the fact that you have positioned the text to the right hand side. This shows that you have considered the fact that people generally look from left to right and therefor consumers attention will initially be on the photography and then proceed to the lettering. I like the way you have separated the text with different colours- black and pink- as this creates a distinction between the artists own name and the title of her album. I also think that the use of different sized text is good as the more important information is prominent. In terms of what could have been improved, I think that you could of rearranged the imagery and text on your poster in order to include some ratings/ reviews as this is often a convention of Pop magazine adverts. However, I realise that you wanted to make the image of the artist a focal point and therefore enlarged it so that there was no space for ratings or reviews. Digipak Booklet: I think the fact that you have included a small lyric booklet to go inside your digipak is a really nice detail and shows that you have thoroughly considered all the ways to make the product more interesting for consumers.Your use of additional pictures of the artist in the booklet was a good choice as it means that people will be more inclined to buy the digipak in order to get the unseen images. It has been put together really well and I think the fact that you have reduced the opacity of the pictures beneath the lyrics is helpful as it means the text is easily legible. The 'with love' lettering also works well as it tricks buyers into thinking each album is more individualistic (despite the fact that it has been printed on them all). Overall, I really like both of the products you have created- taking into consideration your genre of music. I think that you have considered conventions well and effectively composed all aspects of your work. Digipak: The comments that I previously made about the image on your poster apply to the one used on the cover of your digipak (as they are the same). The fact that you have used the same image is effective in some ways as it links both products together well. The style of both your poster and digipak correspond successfully too. However dissimilar to your poster, where the image was placed on the left hand side, I like the fact that you have centralized it. This creates a pleasing composition and allows the photograph to take command of the cover. Yet again, you have kept text to a minimum which I think works well on the cover as it means that there are no distractions from the imagery of the artist. The title 'Keys' has been aligned well and the bold, pink font manages to distinguish itself from the photograph behind- ensuring that it isn't lost on the page. I also like the way you have designed the back cover and the way which you have centralized the track list and corresponding legal information/ record label. Your digipak would be even better, in my opinion, if you had made the two inside panels white to connect with the back and front cover. However I don't think the fact that they are black is an issue- it's subjective.

I agree with the feedback given from Phoebe. Its very detailed and well explained. Ive been given ways that she feels I could of improved, and told things that work well. I think this feedback is important, and good to look at, because then if I was to produce something like this again with the same genre, I can use the same conventions that worked well, and then reflect on her feedback and she if this would improve my work.

I originally didnt want to use the same photo of both ancillary texts, but after asking different people, they all said that the photo worked the best on both products. Phoebe has commented on the fact that I have used the same picture for both, and that it works well because its effective and links both products together.
Comments from MR SMITH for music video; https://www.dropbox.com/s/xo53fe686hy9r5s/Sophie%20and%20Faye%20Video%20feedback.docx

This feedback was very important for us to reflect on and also look over, so that we could work on areas that needed improving. The sweet shop shots needed more movements, and we had to show the colours of the sweet shop more. I think this was to make it look more girley, colourful and also show the location to the audience. The bedroom shots need more energy, and cheesy movements. I agree with all the feedback given from our first music video.

(location 1 post feedback) You'll need more lighting. At the minute you've back lit the shot, that causes the artist to appear in shadow or darker than the scenery. Two spot lights pointing towards the window...I'll draw you a graph next lesson.

After taking shots of the first location and being given feedback, this helped both me and Sophie when filming for our first media video. We reflected back on the feedback, and made sure that the lighting was improved, and before filming each shot we insured that the lighting looked good on the camera, and that our artist didnt look washed out, red or shadowed. I think its important to get small feedback like this, because then were able to improve.
(Animatic comments) Show this animatic to people and see if they are able to identify the narrative. Do you need to add or remove shots to get the 'story' across?

After showing our animatic to several people within the same age range, they all said that they could tell it would be an energetic music video with the amount of shots and quick cuts it in. They said that some of the shots where hard to visualize what theyd be like, due to our drawings not being detailed. However wed written in detail below the shot exactly what our artist would be doing and the timings of each shot.
(Pitch comments) Kelly Maxwell You have established the storyline well. Also, you have made it clear what the artist will look like, which is very good. However, you could mention what lighting you would be using :)

Gregor christie you have setup the video well so that it is easy to understand what type of video you are aiming to produce. you cover most of the topics needed in the 25 word pitch. doesn't say the name of the band. Alex Parr *well established character *very detailed storyline *well established target audience *who will be your artist in the video?

Jess, Phoebe & Meg The concept for the video corresponds well with the genre of music chosen and will possibly appeal to some of the target audience who are younger and also 'wanting to live their dream'. The 'girl next door' style and 'homely' appearance of the artist is also something which I think will work successfully, as it will provide a good role model for the audience and someone who is relatable. However the target audience of 16- 22 is perhaps not appropriate, I feel that because of the song and style of the artist it may appeal to a younger audience, maybe 13- 18. Hannah Hall You have clearly shown the storyline for the video and the concepts within it so we get a clear idea of what it will be about. You might need to establish the exact location for filming early so that you can get permission from the owner or manager of the cafe/shop. Isabelle Zanker I think that the location is well thought out and that the basic storyline is good too. There could be the artists name mentioned and you have styled your artist well. Sam Jones You have a well thought out pitch, you have considered location well and the style well.

This feedback is important for both me and Sophie to look at and reflect from it as our classmates have commented ways which they feel work well and have been well shown through the pitch and things which we need to think about and establish. After being given this feedback, me and Sophie both thought about the artist which we were going to use, our appropriate target audience, exactly where we will be filming our music video, and our artists name. I think that this feedback was effective, as we realised that our target audience was younger than we originally anticipated. We firstly thought that we would film in a caf, but after thinking about the target audience we thought that the sweet shop would be better suited and fit our target audience well.
(First pitch comments) This needs WAAAAAAAAAAAY more detail. I have no idea from this what sort of video you are making. Is it performance, is it narrative, is it both?Improve this as a matter of urgency as currently it looks like in spite of all your R&P you have no ideas

what so ever, that means no matter how good all the R&P is you can't be awarded high band marks because there is no evidence you've learnt from it.

This is our feedback from our very first pitch that me and Sophie produced. After reading the feedback from it, we realised that we needed to add a lot more detail and make it understandable to any audience of what our music video will be like. We noted that we had to decide if we were doing a performance or narrative video, which we both decided to do a narrative as it best suits our genre.
(song ideas) As with the previous post add a few words and thoughts on these videos, why have you posted them, what do they show about your genre and the types of artists who perform? Are there things you could recreate, are there things which will be difficult for you to recreate?

Before deciding of our song, we both thought about different artists and different songs which we both like. This feedback was important for us both, so that we could finally narrow down an artist and a song. It made us think if they were songs we would be bale to recreate ad songs that a potential artist would be able to perform to.