Connally Interp Execute Order 66

The Things They Carried By Tim OBrien

Teaser

First Lieutenant Jimmy Cross carried letters from a girl named Martha, a junior at Mount e!astian College in "e# Jersey$ They #ere not lo%e letters, !ut Lieutenant Cross #as ho&ing, so he 'e&t them folded in &lastic at the !ottom of his ruc'sac'$ (n the late afternoon, after a day)s march, he #ould un#ra& the letters, hold them #ith the ti&s of his fingers, and *e #ould imagine romantic cam&ing tri&s into the +hite Mountains in "e# *am&shire$ More than anything, he #anted Martha to lo%e him as he lo%ed her, !ut the letters #ere mostly chatty, elusi%e on the matter of lo%e$ To carry something #as to hum& it, as #hen Lieutenant Jimmy Cross hum&ed his lo%e for Martha u& the hills and through the s#am&s$

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Connally Interp Execute Order 66 (n his #allet, Lieutenant Cross Carried t#o &hotogra&hs of Martha$ The first #as signed Lo%e, though he 'ne# !etter$ The second &hotogra&h had !een cli&&ed from the ./01 Mount e!astian year!oo'$ (t #as an action shot2#omen)s %olley!all2 and Martha #as !ent hori3ontal to the floor, the left 'nee coc'ed and carrying her entire #eight$ Lieutenant Cross remem!ered touching that left 'nee$ 4 dar' theater, he remem!ered, and the mo%ie #as Bonnie and Clydeand during the final scene, #hen he touched her 'nee, she turned and loo'ed at him in a sad hand !ac', !ut the feel of the 'nee and the sound of the gunfire that 'illed Bonnie and Clyde, ho# em!arrassing it #as$ *e remem!ered 'issing her good night at the dorm door$ 5ight then, he thought, he should)%e done something !ra%e$ *e should)%e carried her u& the stairs to her room and tied her to the !ed and touched that left 'nee all night long$ *e should)%e ris'ed it$

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Connally Interp Execute Order 66 +hat they carried #as &artly a function of ran', &artly of field s&ecialty$ Ted La%ender, #ho #as scared, carried 67 rounds #hen he #as shot and 'illed outside Than 8he, and he #ent do#n under an e9ce&tional !urden, more than :; &ounds of ammunition, &lus the fla' jac'et and helmet and rations and #ater and toilet &a&er and tran<uili3ers and all the rest, &lus the un#eighed fear$ *e #as dead #eight$ There #as no t#itching or flo&&ing$ 8io#a, #ho sa# it ha&&en, said it #as li'e #atching a roc' fall, or a !ig sand!ag or something2just !oom, then do#n2not li'e the mo%ies #here the dead guy rolls around and does fancy s&ins and goes ass o%er tea'ettle2not li'e that, 8io#a said, the &oor !astard just flat fell$ Boom$ =o#n$ "othing else$

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Connally Interp Execute Order 66 Lieutenant Cross felt the &ain$ *e !lamed himself$ 5at 8iley said the o!%ious, the guy)s dead, and used his radio to re&ort one >$ $ 8(4 and to re<uest a cho&&er$ They carried him out to a dry &addy, esta!lished security, and sat smo'ing the dead man)s do&e until the cho&&er came$ Lieutenant Cross &ictured Martha)s smooth young face, thin'ing he lo%ed her more than anything, more than his men, and no# Ted La%ender #as dead !ecause he lo%ed her so much and could not sto& thin'ing a!out her$ They marched until dus', then dug their holes, and that night 8io#a 'e&t e9&laining ho# you had to !e there, ho# fast it #as, ho# the &oor guy just dro&&ed li'e so much concrete$ Boom?do#n, he said$ Li'e cement$

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Connally Interp Execute Order 66 (n the first #ee' of 4&ril, !efore La%ender died, Lieutenant Jimmy Cross recei%ed a good?luc' charm from Martha$ (t #as a sim&le &e!!le$ mooth to the touch, it #as a mil'y #hite color #ith flec's of orange and %iolet, o%al?sha&ed, li'e a miniature egg$ On the march he carried the &e!!le in his mouth, turning it #ith his tongue, tasting sea salt and moisture$ *is mind #andered$ *e had difficulty 'ee&ing his attention on the #ar$ On occasion he #ould yell at his men to s&read out the column, to 'ee& their eyes o&en, !ut then he #ould sli& a#ay into daydreams, just &retending, #al'ing #ith Martha, carrying nothing$

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Connally Interp Execute Order 66

(n mid?4&ril, it #as their mission to search out and destroy the ela!orate tunnel com&le9es in the Than 8he area$ Before La%ender died there #ere .@ men in the &latoon, and #hoe%er dre# the num!er .@ #ould stri& off his gear and cra#l in headfirst #ith a flashlight and Lieutenant Cross)s $7A?cali!er &istol$ The rest of them #ould fan out as security$ (n some res&ects, though not many, the #aiting #as #orse than the tunnel itself$ (magination #as a 'iller$ Lieutenant Jimmy Cross mo%ed to the tunnel, leaned do#n, and e9amined the dar'ness$ 8neeling, #atching the hole, he tried to concentrate on Lee trun' and the #ar, all the dangers, !ut his lo%e #as too much for him, he felt &araly3ed, he #anted to 'no# her$ (ntimate secretsB +hy &oetryC +hy so sadC +hy that grayness in her eyesC +hy so aloneC "ot lonely, just alone2riding her !i'e across cam&us or sitting off !y herself in the cafeteria2e%en

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Connally Interp Execute Order 66

dancing, she danced alone2and it #as the aloneness that filled him #ith lo%e$

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Connally Interp Execute Order 66 Lieutenant Cross ga3ed at the tunnel$ But he #as not there$ *e #as !uried #ith Martha under the #hite sand at the Jersey shore$ They #ere &ressed together, and the &e!!le in his mouth #as her tongue$ *e #as smiling$ Daguely, he #as a#are of ho# <uiet the day #as, the sullen &addies, yet he could not !ring himself to #orry a!out matters of security$ *e #as !eyond that$ *e #as just a 'id at #ar, in lo%e$ *e #as t#enty?four years old$ *e couldn)t hel& it$ Lee trun' made a funny ghost sound, a 'ind of moaning, yet %ery ha&&y, and right then, #hen trun' made that high ha&&y moaning sound, #hen he #ent 4hhooooo, right then Ted La%ender #as shot in the head on his #ay !ac' from &eeing$ *e lay #ith his mouth o&en$ The teeth #ere !ro'en$ There #as a s#ollen !lac' !ruise under his left eye$ The chee'!one #as gone$ Oh shit, 5at 8iley said, the guy)s dead$ The

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Connally Interp Execute Order 66 guy)s dead, he 'e&t saying, #hich seemed &rofound2the guy)s dead$ ( mean really$

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Connally Interp Execute Order 66 4fter the cho&&er too' La%ender a#ay, Lieutenant Jimmy Cross led his men into the %illage of Than 8he$ They !urned e%erything$ They shot chic'ens and dogs, they trashed the %illage #ell, they called in artillery and #atched the #rec'age, Lieutenant Cross found himself trem!ling$ *e tried not to cry$ +ith his entrenching tool he !egan digging a hole in the earth$ *e felt shame$ *e hated himself$ *e had lo%ed Martha more than his men, and as a conse<uence La%ender #as no# dead, and this #as something he #ould ha%e to carry li'e a stone in his stomach for the rest of the #ar$ 4ll he could do #as dig$ *e used his entrenching tool li'e an a9, slashing, feeling !oth lo%e and hate, and then later, #hen it #as full dar', he sat at the !ottom of his fo9hole and #e&t$ (t #ent on for a long #hile$ (n &art, he #as grie%ing for Ted La%ender, !ut mostly it #as for Martha,

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Connally Interp Execute Order 66 and for himself, !ecause she !elonged to another #orld,

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Connally Interp Execute Order 66

Li'e cement, 8io#a #his&ered in the dar'$ ( s#ear to Eod2!oom, do#n$ "ot a #ord$ ()%e heard this, said "orman Bo#'er$ 4 &isser, you 'no#C till 3i&&ing himself u&$ Fa&&ed #hile 3i&&ing$4ll right, fine$ That)s enough$Geah, !ut you had to see it, the guy just2( heard, man$ Cement$ o #hy not shut the fuc' u&C 8io#a shoo' his head sadly and glanced o%er at the hole #here Lieutenant Jimmy Cross sat #atching the night$ The air #as thic' and #et$ 4 #arm dense fog had settled o%er the &addies and there #as the stillness that &recedes rain$ 4fter a time 8io#a sighed$ One thing for sure, he said$ The lieutenant)s in some dee& hurt$ ( mean that crying jag2the #ay he #as carrying on2it #asn)t fa'e or anything, it #as real hea%y?duty hurt$ The man cares$ ure, "orman Bo#'er said$ ay #hat you #ant, the man does care$ +e all got &ro!lems$ "ot La%ender$ "o, ( guess not, Bo#'er said$ =o me a fa%or, though$

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Connally Interp Execute Order 66

hut u&C

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Connally Interp Execute Order 66

They #ere tough$ They carried all the emotional !aggage of men #ho might die$ Erief, terror, lo%e, longing2these #ere intangi!les, !ut the intangi!les had their o#n mass and s&ecific gra%ity, they had tangi!le #eight$ They carried shameful memories$ They carried the common secret of co#ardice !arely restrained, the instinct to run or free3e or hide, and in many res&ects this #as the hea%iest !urden of all, for it could ne%er !e &ut do#n, it re<uired &erfect !alance and &erfect &osture$

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Connally Interp Execute Order 66

On the morning after Ted La%ender died, First Lieutenant Jimmy Cross crouched at the !ottom of his fo9hole and !urned Martha)s letters$ Then he !urned the t#o &hotogra&hs$ *e reali3ed it #as only a gesture$ tu&id, he thought$ entimental, too, !ut mostly just stu&id$ La%ender #as dead$ Gou couldn)t !urn the !lame$ (n those !urned letters Martha had ne%er mentioned the #ar, e9ce&t to say, Jimmy, ta'e care of yourself$ he #asn)t in%ol%ed$ he signed the letters Lo%e, !ut it #asn)t lo%e, and all the fine lines and technicalities did not matter$ *e hated her$ Ges, he did$ *e hated her$ Lo%e, too, !ut it #as a hard, hating 'ind of lo%e$ "o more fantasies, he told himself$ *enceforth, #hen he thought a!out Martha, it #ould !e only to thin' that she !elonged else#here$ *e #ould shut do#n the daydreams$ This #as not Mount e!astian, it #as another #orld, #here there #ere no &retty &oems or midterm e9ams, a &lace #here men died !ecause of

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Connally Interp Execute Order 66

carelessness and gross stu&idity$ 8io#a #as right$ Boom?do#n, and you #ere dead, ne%er &artly dead$

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Connally Interp Execute Order 66 *e #as no# determined to &erform his duties firmly and #ithout negligence$ *e #ould dis&ose of his good?luc' &e!!le$ *e #ould acce&t the !lame for #hat had ha&&ened to Ted La%ender$ *e #ould sho# strength, distancing himself$ 4mong the men there #ould !e grum!ling, of course, and may!e #orse, !ecause their days #ould seem longer and their loads hea%ier, !ut Lieutenant Jimmy Cross reminded himself that his o!ligation #as not to !e lo%ed !ut to lead$ *e #ould dis&ense #ith lo%eH it #as not no# a factor$ form into a column and mo%e out to#ard the %illages #est of Than 8he$

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