5.

Peaches Written by /u/talkingbook

Copyright (c) 2014

An Apple A Day Draft 04/30/2014

EXT. BEAUTIFUL SPRINGTIME MOUNTAIN TOP - DAY Somewhere in the French Alps. Green grass and mountain flowers grow. This is the kind of mounatin where Julie Andrews twirls and sings about the sound of music. In the distance a pair of weary travelers whom we will come to know as HENRY and PERCY, walk a, long, primitive dirt road towards the summit. The men, MEN OF THE ROAD, are ragged and lean. Before the invention of the car if you wanted to get up a mountain road, and you had no horse to take you, you walked. These men WALK. Burdened with oversized backpacks they wear simple wool shirts and pants. Due to the warm spring weather all their heavy clothes are tucked away in the packs, making them extra burdensome. Tall, heavy walking sticks, keep them steady on the uneven, unpaved, path. EXT. BEAUTIFUL SPRINGTIME MOUNTAIN TOP, SUMMIT - DAY Henry and Percy rise over the summit and pause at the breathtaking beauty. Beneath them a small quaint French village lies hidden in the valley. Smoke plumes pipe out of the hamlet's chimmneys. Henry puts a hand on Percy's shoulder. HENRY You smell that? Percy takes in the scents of the spring air. PERCY I don't smell anything. HENRY I do. Cassoulet of white beans with braised pork, sausage, and duck confit. PERCY You can smell all that? (CONTINUED)

CONTINUED: HENRY I have a preternaturally good sense of smell. PERCY Or you're just so hungry you're hallucinating smells. HENRY You can't hallucinate smells, Percy. PERCY I had a cousin, got kicked in the head by a horse when she was fourteen. From that day on, the lord as my witness, she said she could smell popcorn every time it rained. HENRY That may well be true but I've never been kicked in the head by a horse, and I smell duck confit. In the distance dark storm clouds roll into the valley. PERCY Well, as much as I'd love to stand here and debate this fascinating subject, that storm's coming in fast. I suggest we keep moving. EXT. BEAUTIFUL SPRINGTIME MOUNTAIN TOP, ROAD - DAY

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Henry and Percy press on along the trail. This time winding down towards the village. HENRY Did I ever tell you about the best duck confit I've ever tasted? PERCY Was it in Paris, when you were living with what's-her-name? HENRY No. Boston of all places. New England has a suprisingly large number of French expats. Little place in Beacon Hill. You'd never find it unless you were looking. Owner's this guy named Maurice but everyone called him Frenchy. (MORE) (CONTINUED)

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3. HENRY (cont'd) Total psycho but the man could cook. The trick he said was using extra duck fat because the meat's so lean. You have to really saturate it-PERCY Wait. Are you talking about Frenchy Dupont from Beacon Hill? HENRY Yeah, Frenchy from Beacon Hill. PERCY The guy who went nuts and massacred all those school kids. HENRY I didn't hear about that. PERCY You know they said he kept some of the victims bodies and ate them. Dude was a canibal. That duck fat was probably human fat. HENRY A. That's a pretty extreme leap in logic. B. The guy made a great duck. PERCY So you're not bothered at least a little by the prospect that you might of eaten something that had a drivers license? HENRY Fuck no! First of all I doubt it. And second of all what the hell are we doing out here way out in the middle of the French wilderness. The food back home is garbage. Just the laundry list of poison that's in FRUIT is enough to make you throw in the towel. Fruit. Natures perfect food. So fucking poisonous a dog wouldn't eat it. And that's what were feeding to our families. Jesus, it makes me crazy just thinking about it. So, am I saying I want people? No. That's disgusting and wrong. But we keep poisoining the food we have it ain't going to be long before that's all we CAN eat. (CONTINUED)

CONTINUED: PERCY I really have to consider what you just said, considering I'm going to be sleeping next to you on a lonely isolated mountain. HENRY Relax. Once we get to this town there will be more than enough food to last the night. PERCY What about tomorrow night? HENRY That, we;ll have to see. EXT. QUAINT FRENCH HAMLET - DAY Henry and Percy enter the town. The townsfolk pay them no more than a passing glance. A town like this has seen it's fair share of travelers. A sign above a small hut reads: 'Astragal's de Restaurant' The travelers enter. INT. ASTRAGAL'S - DAY Henry and Percy enter the cozy resturant.

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A high energy older woman ASTRAGAL greets them. Jabbering in French so fast they can barely understand. HENRY (in broken french) What is on the menu today? ASTRAGAL (in french) We have cassoulet of white beans with braised pork, sausage, and pyrenean? HENRY (broken french) What is pyrenean? ASTRAGAL (french) Like a small marmet. (CONTINUED)

CONTINUED: PERCY What's she saying? HENRY Sounds like marmet? PERCY Marmet? Like a rat? I think so? HENRY

5.

PERCY You know what? What? HENRY

PERCY Poison fruits not sounding so bad right about now. --