Sunday Times Combined Metros 3 - 2014/04/29 10:38:06 AM - Plate:

3 April 27 2014
EDITOR: Andrew Unsworth DEPUTY EDITOR: Paul Ash CONTACT: Tel: 011 280 5121. e-mail: travelmag@sundaytimes.co.za
DESIGNER: Vernice Shaw SUBEDITOR: Elizabeth Sleith PICTURE SOURCING: Aubrey Paton PROOFREADER: Helen Smith
COVER: A date picker in Nizwa, Oman SOURCE: Greatstock/Masterfile COVER DESIGN: Matthys Moss
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RO B
SC H E R
Accidental To u r i st
Where did you spend
your last holiday?
Angkor Wat in Cambodia,
during Christmas.
What was the best thing
you did while there?
Eat! Besides the historical
significance and beauty of
the place, we really enjoyed
the local Khmer food and
were thrilled to find a wide
variety of vegetarian options.
Your favourite city abroad and why?
Tokyo. Somehow, from my first visit, I have felt
amazingly at home there. I guess I lived there in
a previous life.
What must a first-time visitor see there?
Soak in an onsen (hot spring) and eat lots of
Japanese food.
What should they not bother with?
Pachinko parlours! (Pachinko parlours are these
huge arcades with slot machines quite an
addiction in Japan).
What was your best holiday, ever?
A week travelling down the Amalfi coast in Italy,
followed by a week in the lesser known
destinations of Switzerland pa ra d i se !
And your worst to date? What happened?
I have never had a bad holiday, touch wood.
Which is the worst hotel you have stayed in?
I tend to do my research really well before
setting off anywhere, and so far I have stayed in
the most wonderful places, from tiny
bed-and-breakfasts to game lodges to
sprawling beach resorts. I have never stormed
out of a hotel unsatisfied. I also believe that one
gets what one pays for.
What is the best thing you have been given
on holiday or pinched from a hotel?
I dont steal, though theres more than one
restaurant whose chef I would gladly pinch.
Who would be your fantasy holiday
companion and why?
I happen to have found and married her, and
co u l d n t dream of a holiday without Tina. I find
the restaurant, she orders the food; I find the
stores, she bargains with the shopkeepers; I
book the tickets, she gets the upgrades its a
perfect team.
One place you want to see before you die?
A l a s ka .
Have you had any embarrassing moments
as a traveller?
I was at an airport when this bunch of women
screamed and started rushing towards me. I
graciously smiled and braced myself to pose for
pictures and sign autographs then I realised
they were headed towards a famous cricketer,
who happened to be standing just behind me.
What do you avoid on holiday?
Indian food, backpacking and any form of
dieting.
Vikram Hazra is a musician.
My Kind of H o l i d ay
V I K RA M
H A Z RA
TRAVEL W E E K LY
I
N what was becoming a theme of the
trip, we found ourselves deposited,
once again, in the midst of a deserted
Colombian beach town. A familiar
quiet tension view of receding bus and
last ride out of town began to creep.
Under the enveloping, rain-soaked
darkness, in the narrow yellow light of a
lonely street lamp with no actual beach in
sight, the three of us huddled, all too
stubborn to admit the thought we shared
at that moment.
It was a thought that had first crossed
our minds several weeks earlier, in the
bemused travel agents office.
Are you boys sure? El Choc? Th e
concern of this plump stand-in-for-our-
mother affirmed our off the beaten path
aspirations. More noticeably, it also
introduced the seed of neurosis that
comes with travelling through a country
recently engaged in civil strife. It was a
seed that would grow with every
consecutive mode of public transport
taken in pursuit of our remote
d e st i n at i o n .
The chickling-laden, single-engine
Cessna flight passed relatively smoothly.
It was the prospect of a vague patch of
mown lawn sandwiched between jungle
and sea, which passed for a landing strip
at Bahia Solanos airport, that was a
cause for concern. Things seemed on the
up as we found ourselves travelling on
the luxury of
tarred road
towards the beach
of El Valle, Choco.
This was until our
driver explained, in
broken English,
that notorious
druglord Pablo
Escobar, he bring
family here on holiday. He tarred road.
The final stretch along Playa El
Almejal was a mix of dense tropical
foliage colliding with the rugged beauty
of the Pacific coast. Picture your typical
deserted beach, only in Playa El Almejal,
it is emphasised by a series of dilapidated
former luxury resorts. We later discover
that a number of guerrilla-related
kidnappings several years before had led
to a marked decline in reservations. At
the end of all this stood a wild-haired,
wild-eyed man from Oklahoma named
Tyler Stacy.
Sheeeet. Dont believe the hype.
Youre as safe here as anywhere, he
drawled. As proprietor of the Humpback
Turtle a hostel hed hand built in 2009
with permission from the t ow n s mayor,
and conveniently, his father-in-law
Stacy should know. A week passed in an
i n st a n t .
The warmth of afro-Colombian
hospitality fuelled by a local brew
called Viche, known to cure intestinal
parasites probably helped.
Adventurous spirit restored, we departed
in search of our next possibly guerrilla-
infested destination, a renewed resolve
that would take all of five minutes to
crumble as we now stood shivering at a
bus stop in Palomino.
With Colombia returning to relative
stability in recent years, its Caribbean
coast has become a minefield of
oversaturated tourist traps. But Palomino,
which a friend assured us was a beach
paradise, somehow remains an
unaffected respite from the revelling
hordes that have marred the beaches of
Cartagena and Santa Marta.
Soon enough, we discover why as our
sense of abandonment gives way to the
distinct stench of fuel and deafening
rumble of a hulking 18-wheeler. Paradise?
At this moment, all we can be certain of
is a truck stop.
Two, maybe three days later, an
afternoon spent floating down the
Palomino River on a tube comes pretty
damn close to perfection. Surely, this was
our moment of profound epiphany of how,
in casting aside our Lonely Planet, we d
unlocked the true nature of travel?
Although, that brand of enlightened
traveller is often as insufferable as
backpacker sheep. The truth is there is
no truth each to his own and all that;
one mans truck stop is anothers
paradise.
In the words of ol Tyler Stacy: Dont
believe the hype. Rob Scher is a
New-York based freelance writer
LOVE IN A TIME
OF COLOMBIA
Beyond the travel clichs youll see that one
mans truck stop is anothers paradise
Esco ba r
bring family
here on
holiday. He
tarred road
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