How to Build a Passion Business While Supporting a Family of 8 (the post to kill

excuses)
BY SCOTT | JUNE 20, 2012 | FOLLOW ME ON TWITTER
Tweet
There is no cure for laziness but a large family helps.
- Herbert Prochnov
Answering the difficult questions
I am constantly getting questions from readers about how they can live their leg
end and pursue their passion given whatever life situation theyve found themselves
in. But one situation tends to come up more often than most:
I have a wife (or husband) and kids to support so how can I possibly make the tran
sition to doing work I love?
They then list all kinds of reasons (that at times can be very valid) such as no
t enough time, they wont make enough money, or for whatever reason they just cant ta
ke the risk.
This question is near impossible for me to answer. Simply because I have not bee
n there. I have a wonderful family of two C my wife Chelsea and me. We have plent
y of obligations, but we do not have any kids (yet) and there are no doubt peopl
e who have a lot more at stake than we do.
So the way I always answer this is to point them to the people Ive met over the ye
ars who are in very similar situations, who have families to support and big fin
ancial obligations, who have defied the odds and built an incredible life for th
emselves.
The first person I always point to is Leo Babauta, the creator of Zen Habits.
In a matter of a few years Leo went from working his ass off as a newspaper repo
rter, to creating one of the biggest blogs in the world, and having a 100% passi
on based business C all from a standing start, from scratch, while literally livi
ng in the middle of nowhere out on Guam. Time Magazine consistently rates Zen Ha
bits one of the top 25 blogs.
And the kicker he did all this while supporting a family of 8.
Over a long double date at one of our favorite SF spots, and after a few glasses
of wine, he graciously agreed to write us all an article on how he actually did
it.
Leo and his amazing wife, Eva, are good friends and hes been a huge inspiration in
a lot of ways. Live Your Legend would not exist if it wasnt for the support, guid
ance and ideas Ive received from him over the years.
So without further ado, heres a guest post from Leo Babuata of Zen Habits
A man who can answer this question far better than I can.
*****
Enter Leo:
Im often asked, as a father of six kids, how Ive been able to live a life where I pu

rsue the things Im most passionate about, to focus on creating something meaningfu
l despite having large family obligations. I have to support my family, maintain
my relationship with my wife, spend time with my kids, help around the house, he
lp my wife homeschool the kids and yet, Ive created a life where I do the things I
love.
I write every single day, read novels I love, run and exercise, pursue new learn
ing, help others in ways that are deeply satisfying, meet with friends who are d
oing things theyre passionate about.
How is this possible?
The answer is simply simplicity. I learned very early on that my family was my m
ost important thing, but that I didnt have enough time for them. And so I made tim
e, by simplifying my commitments, one by one. I had time for my family, but I al
so needed time for doing the work I loved, so I made more time by simplifying mo
re commitments, simplifying my work, and simplifying my family life. If you can
simply your family life, your other commitments, and the steps it takes to pursu
e your passion, youll have enough time. If you dont simplify, youll just be trying to
cram more things into an already crowded container.
How I Simplify Commitments
When I realized I had too much on my plate for my family and doing the work I wa
s excited about, I realized something had to give. So I started to simplify comm
itments:
I started saying no to work committees. Yes, this meant I wasnt as popular at work, bu
t I decided my standing at work was less important than finding time for my fami
ly and passions.
I resigned from soccer coaching and the PTA board I was on. I wanted to be invol
ved in my kids activities and school, but the commitments meant I was spending mor
e time with other people working on various projects and teams, rather than actu
ally spending time with my family.
I stopped accepting so many invitations. I had to say no.
I reserved one day a week (Sundays) for nothing but hanging out with my family a
nd playing. That meant no parties, no other social obligations, no work, nothing
.
I started getting out of other projects and commitments, one at a time. Getting
out of these things is often just an email or a phone call.
Heres what I learned:

You think it will be horrible resigning or saying no to a project, but while peo
ple might say please!, they will usually accept it after a couple firm no thank yous
ind another way to make it work. Life goes on.
Telling people your policy helps to keep your boundaries firm: Sorry, I dont make co
mmitments for Sundays because its family day, or Sorry, Im not taking on any other co
tments for the next few months because my plate is full.
Its very easy to say yes to something, because it never sounds very difficult. But
it will usually take about 5-10 times as much of your time as you think. Seriou
sly. If your plate is full now, dont say yes to something without clearing away so
mething else.
Youre not missing out on all the fun. It might sound like other people are having
fun by going to all these cool parties, but you can have as much fun staying hom
e and playing board games or kick ball with your family.
How I Simplify My Family Life
Family obligations dont have to take up your entire life, but they should be made
a top priority. I work at home, and my kids get my attention if they want it. Th
at said, I also make it clear when I need to get work or some other commitment d

one. Here are some of the things I do to simplify my family life:

I work early while the family is sleeping. My most important work is done in the
early morning, so that by the time everyone else is moving for the day, I have
time
I reserve later in the day for the family. Theres always a point in the afternoon
when I decide to call it quits, and focus on spending time with the kids. If I d
ont, I can easily work into the night and never have time for the family.
I take walks with my wife. We walk to do errands, grocery shopping, and to go to
the gym together. We also do runs together sometimes.
I let my kids know when I need to work. While working from home means I can alwa
ys make time for my family, I also need to have work time. So I teach them to ta
ke care of themselves, learn on their own, help each other out, and entertain th
emselves, when I have to focus on work.
We homeschool our kids. My wife does most of the homeschooling from home, so the
res no rushing the kids off in the morning, no commute to school and work, no big
van needed to shuttle the family around to various events.
We dont overschedule our kids. Many kids have every minute of their day scheduled,
from school to school organizations to sports to music or dance lessons to play
dates and more. We do some of those things, but very few of them, and never more
than one at a time. So sure, our kids do less than most kids, but they then hav
e to learn how to keep themselves entertained, and have more free time for most
kids. Thats good for them, and it means were less busy.
We teach the kids to be self-sufficient. All our kids know how to get their own
breakfasts, shower, dress themselves and brush their teeth, and the older ones k
now how to do dishes, laundry, sweep and mop, clean their rooms, cook simple lun
ches and dinners, and watch the younger ones. That means we have lots less work
to do, and theyre learning responsibility.
We arent worried about keeping up with the Joneses. The kids dont have to have the l
atest gadgets or clothes, and were not worried that theyre behind other kids in learn
. All kids learn at their own pace, and theres no one pace that all kids should ke
ep up with. Our kids learn based on what theyre interested in, not what other kids
their age should know. That means we are more relaxed about education, and everythi
ng else, and helps keep things simple.
How I Keep My Passions Simple
While I think having work that Im passionate about is very important (second only
to my family), if I want to fit it into my life and still have family time, I ne
ed to be good about keeping work simple. Heres what I do:
I work from home. This saves a lot of commute and other time, so that I can get
my work done in a much shorter time than most people, and have time for family.
I limit my time. I didnt always work from home when I first started pursuing this p
assion, I had to do it in between regular work, family time and other commitment
s, and so I found ways to make my time matter. The trick is to set limits I have
an hour to write before I go to work, so I dont have time to mess around. This lim
it forces you to focus on whats important, to make important choices. I do the sam
e thing now that Im working from home: I set limits to how long I have to write, s
o I can get that done without filling that time with other things. I limit how m
uch time I have for email and other social online stuff, forcing me to make the
most of that limited time.
I do 1-3 important things first. My early morning times, before the family awake
s, is critical if I dont get the most important things done then, I might never get
them done. So I pick one important thing to do today, and do that first, before
my day gets chaotic. If I can, Ill do a second important thing, and then a third.
I cut out the things that dont matter (almost everything). Ive learned in the online
world that there are lots of things you can fill your day doing: social network
ing, email, leaving comments on other blogs, improving your design, adding new p
lugins and widgets, checking your stats, and on and on. None of those matter. Th
e only thing that matters is helping your readers with great content. Thats all th

at makes any difference, and if you cut out the rest, you have time for the impo
rtant stuff.
There are a few things to add so that you get an honest picture here.
First, and most important, I didnt do what I do alone. My wife Eva has made it pos
sible, by supporting what I do from the beginning, by (later) quitting her job a
nd homeschooling the kids (she wanted to do it, but it really helped me), by mak
ing sure I have time to work when I need it.
Second, it didnt all happen overnight. I didnt just quit my job and work from home.
I started by finding spaces of time I could use to pursue my passion waking up ea
rlier and writing for an hour in the morning, writing during my lunch break at w
ork, writing after work for a bit, writing when other co-workers were playing Fr
eecell (this was pre-Facebook time), writing a bit on Saturdays. It was importan
t to me, so I made the time.
Third, sometimes it gets harder before it gets easier. Simplifying any of the ar
eas of your life takes time, so you have to find the time to do it, and make the
effort. Thats difficult for many people, so they dont bother. That means they never
find the time to work on their dreams, and they blame their job and family obli
gations. I was one of those people for a long time.
When I finally found the passion ignited inside me, I stopped making excuses and
started making priorities. And other than marrying Eva, Ive never made a better d
ecision.
*****
Enter Scott:
Leo is one of those people who, through the way hes lived and what hes built, shows
us that so much more is possible than most believe. I hope this helps you realiz
e that most reasons for not doing something meaningful are simply excuses. Find
the people who have done what you want to do and follow suit.
Thanks for being the model you are Leo C both to me and so many others.
For those of you unfamiliar with Leos work, please go check it out for a few minut
es at Zen Habits. Some of his favorite topics to help people on are simplicity,
fitness and habit change, but he covers a lot more. Enjoy!
Now its your turn
What challenges or questions do you have in pursuing your passion and balancing
obligations? Leave them in the comments and lets see if Leo or I can chime in with
some responses!
FYI- Im currently out exploring Turkey and I think Leo and his family are out in I
taly so I hope you understand if theres a little response delay on our end .