Married Couples and Affairs

http://affairdetectornow.blogspot.com

Today, as the world is moving very fast towards modernization (specifically the IT boom
and the invention of internet), many societal failings have also taken place. And with this
dilemma the fact of upgrading the taste of new life partner has also been attaining its
altitude. We have seen that women to some extent tolerate men for having an affair but
today the fact is not hidden that likewise men women are also having affairs.

What is an Affair? There we find many examples around us. A person may be seen fed up
with spouse, so starts getting attracted to an appealing person of the opposite sex in the
next cubicle. This person is known for years, and it’s so easy to talk. S/he just listens.
Pretty soon the sharing of intimate problems starts, and now the co-worker tells how hard
it has been undergoing this. And then s/he advises the best way out seemingly which is to
just leave the spouse and then maybe the two of them go out to lunch to talk more about it
all. Here it is revealed with this person all one needed so badly during this condition and
that’s a sympathetic ear, someone who understands the problems and all one is going
through, maybe even the first meaningful physical touch s/he’s had for months.

Apparently, not all office relationships lead to affairs, and not all affairs start at work
but, this exhibition is an overly simplified and time-compressed way how some people start
down the path of cheating on their spouse.

There is no age limit to start having a marital affair. Whether a person has been married
for thirty days or thirty years, it is hard to resist from an extramarital affair. We can’t
provide a definite number that how many married people are cheating on their spouses?
But many studies and estimates normally have shown that more than one-third of men and
about one-quarter of women admits to having had at least one extramarital sexual act.
Whereas if we enumerate the cases of “emotional infidelity” — where a spouse engages in
an intimate (yet not sexual) friendship with a member of the opposite sex — the numbers
are much higher, probably greater than 50 percent.

In an affair a person regardless of his/her wish adopts dual personality. S/he will always
have to hide something from spouse or the person with whom there is having affair.
Divorce is more likely to occur when the woman has the affair. And, unfaithful women are
viewed more negatively than unfaithful men in many cultures.

Why an affair? Though reasons for affairs are many, often they can be identified;
generally, there is one primary reason which may not be easily noticeable, especially if that
reason feels inappropriate to the person.

Some primary reasons why a married person has an affair is

S/he is martially unhappy

There are family problems
S/he needs some excitement
Some very good understanding takes place with another person
Falling in love with another person
S/he wants to overcome the desire of Lust or Sex
Revenge the partner
S/he wants Freedom or independence
S/he wants to end the marriage

In order to understand the reasons a married person has an affair, it helps to understand
a man or woman, however, as with any cause and effect dynamic, generalizations may still
be made. Factors which make it difficult to know the real reasons are that all of us like to
think that we’re doing things for a reason which makes sense.

An affair has two possible directions: one, the affair continues, or two, the affair ends.
The possibilities encountered on either path are whether or not the spouse knows of the
adultery and whether or not the marital relationship ends.

Studying about why married couples have affairs, I came across some aspects amongst
which the most important one related to marital life is having bad and poor process of
communication and consultation.
In the course of my research I found out that communication is central to a healthy
marital life. It is the main source of harmony, love, and the continuity of marital life. The
absence of proper communication builds up to conflict that, which then could possibly end
the marital life. As well from the religious point of view, in the matter of nursing a child,
communication and consultation with each other is very important.

Some Empirical studies have also shown that absence of proper communication, dialogue,
and conversation between spouses and married couples give rise to violence and it perishes
the wisdom.

If a husband doesn’t consult his wife or vice versa believing that the spouse is incapable of
providing a sound and wise decision in any issues related to their martial life, the
household, or public affairs then he has also been mistaken and ignorant in choosing
him/her as an eternal life partner.

In this essence, married couples must maintain a strong marital bond by having a firm
communication and consultation with each other. The moment this process weakens, the
marital life vulnerabilities heaps up until the relationship becomes “cold” and this coldness
leads to the attempt of one or both couples to find warmth outside the marital
relationship giving a gap to marital affairs to be played.