Posted originally on the Archive of Our Own at

http://download.archiveofourown.org/works/554823.
Rating:
Archive Warning:
Category:
Fandom:
Relationship:
Character:

Teen And Up Audiences

Graphic Depictions Of Violence
F/M, Gen

Additional Tags:

Angst, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe Dark, Alternate Ending, Action/Adventure
Part 1 of Violet Hill
Published: 2012-11-05 Chapters: 10/10 Words: 22479

Series:
Stats:

Megamind (2010)
Megamind/Roxanne Ritchi
Megamind, Metro Man, Hal Stewart | Titan, OC - Character, Minion
(Megamind), Roxanne Ritchi

Fix You
by Hypsidium
Summary

When you try so hard and you don't succeed, when you get what you want but not what
you need, I will try to fix you. What if Megamind had actually been injured by Titan? A
darker retelling of the end of the movie. Follows movie canon, with some additional twists.
Note: Posted all in one go as story was finished before publishing here.

Notes
See the end of the work for notes

I'm Dying
Not a day goes by that I don't know that I'm dying.
The fall down the stairs to land hard on his side on filthy concrete was not the worst part of his
day thus far. Really he had trouble putting his finger on what really counted as the worst part of it,
but he was certain it involved the bitter twist in his chest and reaffirmation that he was indeed the
most unlovable person on Earth. Maybe the Milky Way, of that he couldn't be sure. What
Megamind was sure of was that he was hurt, and badly.
He grunted and sat up, immediately regretting it from the wave of nausea that hit him. Immediately
he assessed the damages to his person; nausea meant he may have taken a more severe blow to the
head than he had thought previously and the mild drowsiness that was setting in as adrenaline was
coursing out of his system supported the theory.
Best to get a move on though, no telling if Titan would be following him or not. Maybe if he was
lucky the monster he had created would not have the intellectual fortitude to realize he was hurt
worse than he had first appeared. Megamind shoved the flitting thoughts to the back burner and
focused his attention on his hands, counting his fingers to be sure his vision wasn't impaired. It
was slightly fuzzy, but acceptable for his needs. Thus it became time to make sure he could still
walk properly, he was quite sure his back had impacted with the hard edge of the long line of
stairs more than once.
Getting his knees underneath himself took more effort than he thought required, giving him need
to worry. After what felt like an eternity he had the balls of his feet planted on the ground ready
for him to push up onto them. His back felt like it was simultaneously on fire and wet, which
meant he must be bleeding profusely. He amended the earlier theory of a concussion with blood
loss as a possibility.
"Are you alright, dear?" came a quavering voice to his right.
He squinted up to see an elderly woman focusing somewhere over his left shoulder. Honestly he
had forgotten there were people still in the subway station, and that little shot of awareness made
him glance out of the corner of his eye at the crowds backing away from him. Plastering
themselves against walls. Shielding children. Something that remained in his heart broke into
pieces.
He looked back up at the old woman in wonder. Why was she helping him?
"I..." he felt a sense of shock at the bubbly and nasally quality of his speech and looked down to
see a steady drip of blood on the floor. Possible broken nose, bitten tongue, broken lip. He added
to his checklist. "I..." he started again.
The woman furrowed her brow in concern and offered her hand to his knee. "I heard you fall
down, what happened up there?"
Oh. It was obvious now. The only person who would help him had to be blind, of course. He
took the hand and her help gladly though, no time to quibble about his pride. On his feet again he
laid a shaking hand on her shoulder.
"Awful things," he managed, his speech much less articulate than it would have been otherwise.
"You should go somewhere safe, s'not safe up there now. Go home."

The woman nodded and stroked his hand thoughtfully, her expression changing fractionally as she
felt the leather. "You're bleeding son, I can smell the copper. Will you be alright to get home or do
I need to call an ambulance for you?"
Megamind bit his lip and cast another glance around at the gathered crowd. They were all frozen
in terror, not about to move against him. He opened his mouth to say he could make it back...But
to where? Where was home now? The lair stood empty but for his brainbots and he could not
make that distance on foot in his condition anyway. Nor did the subway go that far. He cast a
blurry eyed look at the broken watch on his wrist, missing Minion more than ever in that moment.
By his estimations he had about two hours and thirty-five minutes before his physical prowess
failed him and he passed out.
"I just need to get to 1382 West Kestrel."
"Oh, what luck, my grandson lives not four blocks from there," the woman smiled. An honest
smile that reached her half lidded eyes. She squeezed his hand very gently. "I'll ride with you, dear
heart. We'll take the Brown Line, it's the quickest."
Megamind managed a querulous half smile in return and followed the woman obediently onto the
train. Once aboard they found seats very easily, considering all the other passengers had sudden
appointments on other train cars except for one kid listening to an iPod and engrossed in a comic
book sitting in the corner.
Along the way the woman kept him awake by regaling him with tales of her children,
grandchildren, her two cats (James and Andy), and her life before she became old. Truth be told
he wasn't sure how interested he was but he listened patiently and made the appropriate noises
back at her. Her name was Iris Thomas, had gone blind in her late thirties, had three children, and
had been a nurse in World War Two. She talked endlessly of her grandson, Mike, who she was
sure would be home, and assured him that she could make it to his apartment on her own once he
was dropped off at the appropriate building.
For his part Megamind tried not to volunteer much information, which suited Iris fine as she could
continue lauding her family. Megamind grimaced, wishing he had this sort of woman as a
grandmother in his own life. A pang of jealously stabbed his heart again, as it had so many times
before. It wasn't fair.
The rest of the trip was less eventful, aside from quickly dehydrating Roxanne's doorman before
he could shout a warning at Iris. He then turned and very gently placed a blood smear kiss on the
woman's cheek. "Thank you, Iris. I will repay you one day."
She reached up and patted his cheek with a soft smile. "Just fix things, Megamind. That's all I
want."
He drew back, stiffening. "What...How?"
"Old women are cleverer than they look," she winked. "And I'm only legally blind, I can still see
that you're blue and red all over. Just fix things. Make the city live again. Please," the last was
spoken softly, a plaintive request. "I've been around longer than you have, I know what this city
was like before you, though I won't know it after you. You can set things right again, if you
choose to do the right thing."
With that she turned and walked out the door, leaving him stunned and dripping in the lobby for a
few moments to contemplate her request before he turned and made the arduous journey up the
stairs to Roxanne's apartment.

---Ding dong, ding dong, ding dong!

Roxanne growled, putting down her little tub of Ben and Jerry's before stalking to the door. She
was greeted with a green eye staring into the peephole and rolled her eyes, cracking the door but
not taking the chain off. "What are you doing here?"
His face was mushed up against her door. "Titan's gone evil," he slurred, his voice strangely
nasally.
"Congratulations! Another of your brilliant plans gone wrong!" Roxanne exclaimed, infuriated
that he just had to come all the way over and tell her this oh-so-astonishing news. "And why did
my doorman let you up?"
A cube was offered to her in a bloodstained hand. She couldn't help it, she snatched the cube
fearfully. "Carlos!" she gasped, her hands shaking. Carlos had a wife and kids. She tried to shut
the door and was surprised at the strength the alien exhibited against her force.
"No, no! I need your help," he sounded pathetic for a man who may have just killed someone
with his bare hands. She shivered.
"And why is that?" she ventured, looking about for a convenient weapon. There was nothing in
reach, and she was afraid he might break the chain if she moved from the door.
"Because you're the smartest person I know..." The hand curled around the door was shaking. She
cautiously peered around the door, her eyes widening at the sight of him.
He looked awful. Blood trailed after him through the hall, spatters and drops, no puddles
thankfully. One of his eyes was nearly swollen shut, there was a worrisome bruise on the bridge
of his nose that might have been indicative of a break, and more slices in his suit than she could
count in one glance. Wordlessly she gestured him back from the door and unlatched the chain to
usher him inside.
"You need an ambulance," she stated, aghast.
"No ambulances, hospital wouldn't know what to do with me," he replied firmly, walking across
her carpet towards her couch, then looking after himself with a frown and thinking better of it.
"Sorry 'bout the carpet," he muttered, sitting down promptly on her hardwood floor.
"Don't worry about it...Just...Stay there," she hurried to her bathroom and tore it apart, grabbing
what gauze, bandages, and various medical supplies she had on hand.
"Shit..." she wished she had renewed her first aid training after all those years ago when she had
taken it at the end of high school. Finding her supplies woefully inefficient for something of this
scale insufficient she gathered up some clean towels too and dragged the lot back to her living
room where Megamind sat exactly where she had left him, eyes closed and chin on his knees.
Fearfully she touched his shoulder, concern and latent affection mixing with the rage she still felt
against him. Despite his having tricked her, the feelings she had for him as Bernard were still
lingering and she hated herself a little for it.
His good eye opened and he just looked at her sideways, saying nothing. They stayed like that for
a moment before she withdrew and made a gesture at his body.
"I...Need your help. I can't make it to the lair like this. Can you drive me?" He paused, lips

working over the word a few times before adding, "please?"

Roxanne considered it for only a short time. "Sure. But first we ought to stop the bleeding."
He submitted with so little protest it worried her. He should be talking about how she should have
seen the other guy, or how this was just a ruse to lure her into a false sense of comfort, something
besides the resigned way he dropped his head to her will.
She raised a hand to start wiping away the blood then though better of it. "You know, let's do this
in the kitchen. Her bathroom was too small and she had already gotten all her supplies out there
anyway. A few feet wouldn't kill him any more than the trip from wherever he had been to here
would - she hoped.
Again, without protest, he nodded and struggled to his feet to shuffle into her kitchen and sit in
one of her chairs with an air of being all too familiar with her apartment. The same chair he had sat
in and drank tea as Bernard when they had been trying to figure out the notes still hanging from
her ceiling. There would be time to contemplate the implications of all that later however, right
now him not dying was a priority. She picked up her supplies and moved them to her table,
turning on the sink to the hottest setting and dampening the corner of a towel. She turned back to
him and sighed, giving him a once over with her eyes.
"I need that shirt off to get anything done."
He still had the presence of mind to flush, his cheeks and ears coloring lilac. He sputtered at her,
blood flecking onto her floor. She held up a hand. "Purely professional."
He winced and cast his eyes down, removing the mantle of his cape and letting it fall to the floor.
How a thirty-something year old man could be so embarrassed about being shirtless she would
never know. What she did know was that she would have to cut his shirt off. There was a piece of
shrapnel sticking out of his back, just below his shoulder. It was small enough that she had not
noticed it at first, but now with the remains of the cape gone she could see it glittering in the light
from her windows.
She retrieved her scissors from the drawer beside her sink. He shrank back a little as she
approached him, eyes unsure.
"Easy, I'm going to have to ruin your shirt to get it off you," she held her hands up, scissors loose
in her right palm.
"Did you not realize there was a zipper in the back?" he stared at her blankly.
"Did you not realize you have some kind of metal stabbed into your shoulder?" she countered.
"Oh...I suppose not," he knitted his brow. "It's ruined anyway, I guess, so it won't hurt to have it
in pieces..." he sighed sadly.
She took that as permission and moved to his back, finding the zipper and zipping it down as far
as she dared to loosen it from his skin. It came away with a sticky, wet sound that sickened her.
From there she slipped the scissors into the gap and cut sideways to avoid the piece of copper
driven into his skin as best as she could. Thankfully she found the fabric relatively easy to cut with
her well sharpened scissors and was able to slice clear down to his hips without much incident.
She peeled more fabric from his body, noting that it was some kind of spandex and below that
was another layer of spandex she had to cut similarly. The process seemed to take forever and his
head was tilting forward dangerously.
"Stay with me here," she finally said, breaking the silence and catching his attention from

perilously leaning forward.

"Always," he whispered under his breath. She chose to pretend she hadn't heard. "Er. Yes."
"Why do you wear so many layers?" she gritted her teeth in frustration, cutting her way very
carefully towards the wound on his back and trying not to disturb it too much before she could get
a proper look at it.
"S'cold out there. Aren't you cold?" he sounded honestly confused.
"No, it's June. It's hot out," she held her breath as she snipped through the final layer and began to
peel around the shrapnel.
"You humans, you walk around in your...your spag-hatti strap tank tops. Why are they called tank
tops anyway? They look nothing like tank tops, tank tops are made of metal..." he continued to
ramble and she let him, it kept him awake and let her know he was still aware.
She bit her tongue to keep from saying anything, but he heard the worried noise she made in her
throat at the sight of his back. It was half raw down one side, and right beneath his shoulder blade
the jagged piece of copper jutted upwards. He was very lucky it hadn't punctured his lung.
"Is it bad?" he asked quietly.
She nodded wordlessly at his back, which made him look over his shoulder at her with something
akin to sympathy. It was a little ironic. He shrugged the sleeves of the shirt off and began to wind
it into a thick cord. She could see the tips of his ears purpling again. "Can you do this if I give you
directions?"
She took a breath and nodded again. "Yes, just...give me a minute."
"I have time," he tried to smile, but it looked grisly with his bloodied mouth. She went to the sink
and got the towel so she could mop some of the blood away and see better. She also scrubbed her
hands at the sink, cursing herself for not doing so earlier.
When she turned back to him he still seemed embarrassed, but a little more composed. She found
it surprising how thin and frail he looked, though she ought to have known seeing as his suits
were skin tight.
"I need you to pull it out the same way it went in. It is going to hurt me no matter what, so don't
worry about being too gentle. Then I need you to immediately put as much pressure on it as you
can. Can you do that for me, Ms Ritchie?" He watched her intently.
She swallowed at his reversion to her formal title. "Yes."
He studied her with one eye for a moment, allowing the other to close. Then he got to his feet
shakily and turned the chair so he could lean against it, resting his chin on the back and clamping
his jaws around the cord. His hands gripped the sides loosely, trying to relax the muscles in his
back to make the pulling out easier.
Roxanne bit her lip and used the towel to get a good grip on the slick metal surface. "Alright, on
three...Three," she pulled it back and downwards, trying to ignore his muffled scream of agony.
As soon as it was free she dropped it and pressed the towel tight to his heaving back. She swore
she could see a tear roll down the side of his face, cutting a clean path through the mess. She again
chose not to mention it.
She let him recover, waiting until his breathing had slowed to normal before daring to look under

her hand and see if the wound had scabbed at all. It was still bleeding, but sluggishly, so she
chanced to reach for the gauze and just tie the towel in place. It wouldn't do to pull it away now
that it was doing some good.
For a long moment he said nothing, just breathed into her oak furniture with his eyes closed. Then
he broke the silence. "Well that was...exciting."
She let out a nervous giggle that sounded a little wet to her ears. "Are you sure I can't call an
ambulance?"
"Yes, I am. I need to get back to my lair. All my medical tools are there," he looked over his
shoulder at her and snorted. "No one knows my physiology better than me, after all. What kind of
genius would I be if I didn't have nanomachines for this, I ask you?"
"Not any kind of Boy Scout genius at least," she replied, slipping back into the comfortable
routine of back and forth even if that was an awkward start.
"I'm no Boy Scout, period," he sounded offended. "What does that have to do with anything
anyway? Never mind," he interrupted himself. "Time to go. I have about thirty-eight minutes
before I pass out, give or take a few."
She didn't bother to question him, but made a quick stop into her room to grab her baggiest
sleeping shirt from her drawer and helping him put it on. He cast an approving expression at the
koi fish swimming down the right side and trailed her to the news van parked on the street.
The ride to the lair was unbearably quiet. Megamind tucked his arms into the shirt and shivered so
pitifully that she actually turned on the heat, then the radio just to fill the silence. They drove to the
sounds of news reports coming from across the city, which was not as comforting as music but
better than nothing.
Once there he made a motion for her to just drive right inside, which unnerved her seeing as they
were driving right into a brick wall. She held her breath and let it out in a rush when they didn't
crash and burn.
He gracelessly slid out of the van and greeted his brainbots, sending them off to do various tasks
while he himself went to his chair. Several of them hovered around him, attaching wires and
sensors to his skin. Roxanne wasn't sure what to do and hovered near the van.
She was startled by a nudge at her elbow and looked down to see a brainbot - vaguely familiar out
of the sea of them - pressing a wrench into her hand. It hovered backwards, bobbing up and down
expectantly while she looked at the object in her hand in confusion.
"He wants to play fetch with you," Megamind volunteered, drawing her eyes to him again. "Little
traitor." Even battered and bloody his eyes still glittered with humor at the idea. He took an
offered cylinder from one of his brainbots and gave it an affectionate pat on the dome.
"This can take up to an hour. I don't really recommend you go home either, Titan may be looking
for you next," he warned, before plunging the cylinder to his thigh and sucking in his breath as it
depressed with a click. Roxanne winced and looked away. An epipen. When she looked back
Megamind was passed out.
With a sigh she looked back at the wrench and gave it a half-hearted toss, knowing he was right
about Titan.

Temptation
I went to the desert, I was searching for the truth.
Roxanne sighed when the brainbot brought back the wrench for the fifth time. It seemed to be
tireless about the game, which was fine for a construct, but not so much for keeping her
entertained. She glanced back at Megamind and frowned, noticing how he was curling up on
himself in the chair as if cold.
She cast around for a blanket and was reminded that she really knew nothing about the lair. The
brainbot nudged her hand again, making an inquiring electronic noise. "Oh hey, I didn't forget
about you," she reached out and patted it on the dome awkwardly. It was warm and the static
raised the hairs on her arm.
The bot made a kind of growling noise she took to be the equivalent of a purr. Roxanne kept her
hand resting on its dome absently, looking towards the blue alien again to notice several brainbots
gathering around him, including a larger one she had not seen before. "What are they doing?"
The bot just wiggled under her hand and curled a tendril around her wrist lightly, pulling her
forward towards the gathering of floating robots. The variety struck her then; each was different in
some way, whether by additional spikes or different paint. Each was also showing a different set
of behaviors towards her. Some flitted behind the massive chair and peered around as if shy, some
came directly to her and inspected her uncomfortably close, most just seemed to ignore her in
favor of their unconscious master.
Had he really programmed and built all of these? At most she could recall having seen about fifty
of them altogether, quite a lot to have such differences. She cleared her throat, drawing the
attention of those inspecting her. "Are there any blankets in here? I think he's cold."
Several floated away in a hurry and came back bearing a couple ratty blankets which were draped
over their master without pause. Roxanne felt a little taken aback that they had done it so quickly,
not to mention without trying to tie her up or anything. She decided she might as well try
something else, if only to see what they would allow her to do.
"Can you get me a drink?" Best to start simple. The large brainbot made a faint noise she could
just barely hear, very high pitched. The smaller ones made noises in return and one left for a few
seconds, returning with a warm can of Dr Pepper. Interesting.
"Thanks." She felt a little silly thanking constructs, but if they were intelligent enough to
understand commands then it didn't hurt to be polite. When she looked back at the prone figure in
the chair she could see sweat dripping down his brow.
She put the can on the console and reached over to touch Megamind's head, but was immediately
blocked by one of the smaller brainbots. She held her hands up defensively. "I won't hurt him, I
promise. I just want to see if his head is warm."
The bot made a sound she was sure passed for an unsure noise before moving out of her way.
When her hand contacted his skin she inhaled sharply at the heat radiating off his scalp. It was
uncomfortably warm. "Is this normal?" she questioned.
The brainbots around her bobbed up and down in assent.
Roxanne sighed. "Alright..." she glanced around. The interference of the machinery had caused

the van's radio to be reduced to nothing but static as soon as they had entered the lair, so there
wasn't news to listen to. The only controls she could recall how to work were the cameras, and
she definitely didn't want their faces broadcast anywhere. That left her options of preoccupying
herself to exploring the lair a little more, and God help her if she wasn't curious at least.
With a surreptitious look at the bots, she wandered away. The one that had been playing fetch
with her followed her, coiling its tendrils around her wrist again. It was like having a child holding
her hand. At least it let her lead the way, just acting as an escort. She pointedly avoided the 'exiting' room, though it did cross her mind how odd it was for alligators to enjoy plastic squeaky toys
and disco music. Maybe Megamind just thought they did, or maybe they weren't alligators at all.
Things to contemplate later. For now it was easier to keep her mind off of the current events by
using her so-called nosy reporter skills to try and figure out the man she may have just saved from
death. The nearest section was the curtained off half of the building, which she recalled held the
massive idea wall. She decided she would stop there last since she had already seen it and
continued on past, where she reached what must have been the kitchen area. Cases of Dr Pepper
were stacked in a corner and scattered on the counter were empty bags from Trader Joe's.
Roxanne didn't open any of the drawers, feeling that would be a little too much of an invasion of
privacy. At least if things were out in the open while she was snooping, then she wasn't actively
looking for secrets. At least that was how she justified it to herself, a little unsuccessfully, as she
moved to the next section. As expected, most of the partitioned 'rooms' contained technology she
was afraid to touch out of ignorance of their purpose. There was a robot that looked like it had a
toaster for a head, a tiny headless tin can with a laser protruding from a crude 'chest', a spiked
monstrosity that was somewhere between a spider and a cannon that looked vaguely familiar, and
above all of that the dirigible was floating. When she looked up and saw the last one, she was
taken aback. Overhead brainbots swarmed like thousands of fireflies, lighting the gloom with a
dull blue light. They were so quiet, lurking among the rafters, that she had not registered the hum
above the rest of the machinery around her. Now that she could distinguish their unique noise
from the undercurrent of steady electricity, it was obvious to her.
When did he get time to build all of these? There were definitely way more than a thousand lights
up there, it was completely overwhelming.
The answer came behind the next curtain. Brainbots paused in putting the dome on a shiny new
model to study her with their singular oculars before continuing to weld. Roxanne couldn't help
but wonder if this was some kind of birth and suddenly felt embarrassed to be watching, so she
moved on from there.
The only other place she could spy to look around at was the door at the top of some stairs, which
must have been the business office when the plant was still in operation. After a long climb, she
reached the door and pushed it open cautiously. The door swung open with a slight creak,
allowing her to see...absolutely nothing. The windows had been covered over with paper, and the
lights were off. The only illumination came from the dim lights behind her, and it wasn't exactly
enough to make anything out. She glanced down at the brainbot still 'holding' her hand and gently
pulled her arm forward, using it as a crude flashlight so she could find the light switch. It seemed
reluctant to enter with her, but allowed her to pull it along.
After some fumbling, she found a switch and immediately regretted her decision to come up there.
In a corner of the room sat a mattress with what looked like five or six more ratty blankets piled on
top - the topmost seemed to have a stars-and-moons pattern - opposite it was a large fish tank
containing the largest fish-castle she had ever seen. There were even spikes on it, she noted with
some amusement. There was a long table with a liberal amount of drafting paper left blank
scattered on the surface, a cup full of pencils and what looked like half a doughnut gracing one of

two stools in front of it. Decorating the walls were hundreds of drawings and newspaper
clippings, almost like wallpaper. There wasn't much else to the room, but it still felt very intrusive.
She turned to leave when something caught her eye. Just above the drafting table was a variety of
both color and newspaper clipped photos of her. There were only five, but it was just enough to
give her some slight chills up her spine.
One was from her first appearance in the paper, her with Metro Man giving her his famous first
interview. The subsequent newspaper clippings were from when she had briefly grown her hair
out, and the one next to it from when she had cut it short again. What struck her the most were the
two photographs; one from high school, where she had first met him. It was taken out of the
yearbook. The other was a candid photo of her smirking at something from the all-too-familiar
hostage chair, a little grainy and marked across the bottom with a series of digits - BRAINBOT SX-3 - 12032002. Each of the photos had notes scrawled carefully below them, but she never got
a chance to read them.
"What are you doing up here?"
For once, Megamind had honestly gotten the jump on her.

The Island
I'll take you there.
She couldn't help it, she spun around - shrieking as she did so - seized the cup of pens, and quite
nearly threw the whole thing at his conveniently large target of a head. As it was all of them and
the now confirmed half of a doughnut spilled onto the floor like tiny number two missiles covered
in jam.
Megamind just stared at her with drooping eyes, clutching a tall glass of orange juice in one hand
while the other gripped the door frame and blocked her exit. The hand on the frame she noticed
was shaking, possibly in anger, and she felt a stab of fear course through her veins again. Up until
very recently she was convinced he was evil, it not maliciously so. It was up in the air whether he
would take this offense as reason to become less than gentle with her.
"Ms Ritchi. I have to ask again, whyareyouuphere?" he didn't sound angry, so much as tired.
Roxanne put the cup down where she had gotten it, wincing when it tipped and bounced off the
floor, rolling to stop at his feet. He looked down at it as if disappointed in its inability to stay put.
The brainbot chose this moment to hide behind her. Coward.
Roxanne sucked in her breath, drawing his attention back to her. "I was..." A lie about looking for
the bathroom died on her tongue under his scrutiny. "Alright, I was snooping."
He smiled faintly at that. "I appreciate the honesty. Looks like your nosy reporter skills have paid
off," he puffed out his chest, but only really succeeded in looking very awkward in her now
bloodstained koi fish shirt. "Behold, you have discovered my place of rest and solitude. Except for
Minion."
He took a long drink of his orange juice, draining the glass, and crossed on shaking legs to point at
the pictures she had been inspecting. She noted that the arm that had been clutching the doorway
was clenched into a trembling fist, clutching the shirt fabric. She scratched the idea of him being
angry.
Though it was still a little nerve wracking to have him standing so close to her, his eyes carefully
directed at the wall. She noticed he was a little paler than she would have liked. He was also still
radiating heat and sweat slicked the t-shirt close to his skin at his back, though he was shivering a
little bit.
"Had to keep tabs on you, favorite hostage and all, you understand. It's...It WAS business. And
inspiration," his free hand touched the worn side of the drafting table fondly.
Roxanne kept her tongue, tense and ready to move out of reach if need be.
He seemed to notice. "No need to be afraid. I'm not angry, just confused. But if you would do me
a favor I would appreciate your assistance," he shifted around her to sit on the stool.
"I...Yeah. Sure."
"Excellent," he let his shaking hand rest on his thigh. "I find myself completely unable to get back
down the stairs, so if you would be so kind as to get me a glass of orange juice and dump about
half a cup of sugar into it I would be most grateful." He was trying to be smooth but she could see
how he swayed on the stool. "The brainbots have an unfortunate tendency to spill cups."

Roxanne just nodded and went back down the stairs, it wouldn't hurt to fill the one request. She
hardly noticed her little brainbot friend making a quick get away behind her. After all, she had just
tended to his wounds, driven him back home, then wasted an hour waiting for him to wake back
up. It really couldn't get any more screwed up now unless they started to inexplicably make out.
Even that she wasn't sure where she stood on at this point, she was torn between feeling sorry for
him and hating him for all the pain he had put her through. She would have time to sort out those
feelings later though, for now she got his orange juice and sugar. As an extra measure she grabbed
a box of granola bars she spied peeking out of one of the Trader Joe's sacks before returning to his
bedroom, if it could have been called that.
He sat where she had left him, but it looked as though the tremors had gotten worse. As soon as
he saw her his fist gripped his thigh hard in an effort to stop the shaking. She wordlessly gave him
the glass and watched in fascination as he gulped it like a man dying of thirst in the desert. For all
she knew he was.
"Ohh," he exhaled, putting this glass next to the last one, sugar still slipping down the glass to
settle in the bottom in a sickly smelling slush. "And you brought granola bars too!" he sounded so
excited, like a little kid. She couldn't help the bemused smile that drifted across her face as she
gave him the box, which he promptly tore open and began devouring the contents in the least
polite and dignified manner she had ever born witness to. Did he always eat like this? She had to
wonder.
She stood there, awkwardly looming near the threshold while he finished the entire box off in
what must have been ten minutes. Then he very tidily plucked up the wrappers, folded them in
half, and placed them inside the torn box. "Much better," he flexed his arm experimentally,
frowning at its quivering.
"It's the rebuilt muscle, it causes muscle spasms for a couple hours afterward," he explained,
opening and closing shaking fingers. "It also causes weakness, a drop in blood sugar, and is
poisonous if used more than once every twenty-four hours."
"Ah," she couldn't think of anything else to say in response. She hovered there, unsure if she
should or could leave now or not.
"Titan is a problem."
Way to completely understate the obvious, she thought sarcastically.
"You knew Metroman best, did he have a secret hide out? A lair? A solitary fortress?" he licked
his lips and looked back up at her. "Anyplace he might have hidden away his secrets, his
weaknesses?"
"Well, there might be one place...He took me there once to get away from all the cameras," she
tapped her chin thoughtfully.
"Take me there, I need to see it."
"If it'll help us figure out how to stop Titan..."
"Oh it will," he paused and a flush came up to his cheeks. "But first let me get dressed."
Dressed had involved a fresh skin tight spandex suit and discovering to his shock and horror that
his only remaining cape had holes in it. So now here he was, substituting with a black blanket tied
about his shoulders. Roxanne found it more than a tad ridiculous.
She couldn't say it wasn't cute in its own way though. Just a little.

The schoolhouse wasn't that far outside of town, but it was just far enough for the silence between
them to become uncomfortable.
"So, if you gave Titan his powers why can't you take them away?" Best to stick with a neutral
subject, keep him thinking on solutions.
He sighed, almost as though relieved to have the silence broken. "I can't...I lost my defusing gun
when I forgot where I parked the invisible car."
Him? Forget something? He didn't so much as forget the anniversary of her first kidnapping (he
always gave her a little pin, of himself of course, to commemorate) or her birthday (a cupcake,
every time) or even that one time she had been in the running to win a prize for one of her articles
(a live clover in a hand painted pot). It was strange how considerate he could be in between all the
kidnappings, grand standing, and generally being a massive pain in the rear.
"The night you dumped me," he continued after a pause.
She didn't like where this was going. Her fingers tightened on the steering wheel as she slowed
down, seeing the schoolhouse just ahead.
"Alone. In the rain."
She gritted her teeth.
"...Did you even look back?"
She slammed on the brakes and was gratified by the thump of him hitting the dash. "AAHH! My
GIANT BLUE HEAD!"
"Oops, I guess we're here!" she snapped, turning to look at him as he scrambled up off the
floorboard. She grimaced, feeling a little sorry for bruising him up after having helped him in the
process of recovery, but she would be damned if he didn't deserve it. Seeing that he was okay she
wordlessly exited the van.
He joined her shortly, rubbing his forehead with a hurt expression. "What was...Oh," he looked
up at the school with green eyes wide. "After all these years, this is where he hid it...My old shool
house..."
"You went to school together? Were you playmates or something?" Roxanne forgot to be angry at
him with that additional tidbit of information.
"Oh yes," Megamind sneered at the red building, hands on his hips. "It was...loads of fun being
the last one picked for everything."
"Alright," she held her hands up defensively. "Don't have to bite my head off," she scowled,
brushing past him and inside, heading directly to the teacher's desk. Megamind followed her
slowly. When she pulled the dusty teacher's bell forward to open the trap door under the rug she
looked back and noticed him staring into a corner, brow furrowed. She snorted and brushed it off
as his being curious about the structure, leading the way down the stairs.
Abruptly he swept past her, bounding down the hall like he hadn't been as weak as a kitten just an
hour ago. "You had better hang back, there might be booby traps!" he called. His body language
told her he was fascinated with his surroundings now, and when they reached the door at the end
of the hall he fell back into puzzle mode, attempting to figure it out without touching it.

"You know, I think an apology is in order..." The subject needed to be broached, and now felt
like as good a time as any.
"Alright, but make it quick! We have work to do!" He reached out to stroke the door lightly along
the seam, his still shaking hand out to caution her back.
"...for the other night," she ground out through her teeth.
He didn't seem to hear her. He had seized on the the padlocks, given it several quick twists,
moved a bar, and had the door open. "HA! Ha ha ha ha ha!" he cackled gleefully. "His birthday!
What a sap, that's the kind of combination some idiot puts on their luggage...Pfft, who makes any
significant date their combination anymore? Really, I ask you..."
Roxanne made a note to change her bike lock combination from her mother's birthday in between
seething thoughts of possibly strangling the blue creep. She trailed him into the opulent pad
Metroman had once cultivated for himself, glaring at his back as he meandered around the place
completely enthralled.
How could she have ever cared about this strange man? Apparently the fact they were walking
around a dead man's house was not affecting him the same way it was her. It was a little creepy,
and it was giving her chills up her spine that had nothing to do with the air conditioning.
"I remember when he wore this..." he sounded far away.
"Hey! Can we just focus here?" Roxanne sighed, if he was going to have a trip down memory
lane now was not the time. They'd wasted enough of that already.
"Right, right! Of course!" he nodded and continued to peruse the shelves for clues.
Roxanne rolled her eyes and noticed something on the table that caught her eye. Leaning down
for a closer look she noticed it was just a glass of water, beads of condensation dripping down its
sides and ice cubes floating in the liquid.
Wait. This was bad. They might not be alone here.
"Hey, come over here and look at this," she hissed.
Of course he had no subtlety and raced over as loudly as possible, tripping over himself in the
process. "What is it! What did you find?" he looked thrilled.
She stared at him, a little appalled to find him wearing the cape he had been eyeballing earlier.
How tasteless. "Right...Look at this glass, there are ice cubes in it."
"Yes, that's what happens when water gets cold," he blinked at it owlishly.
Roxanne swatted him in the shoulder and put a finger up to his lips to silence his protest. He
looked so taken aback she half regretted initiating contact like that.
"Wouldn't the ice have melted if it had been left here since the beginning of May?" she whispered.
"Ohhhh, I get it..." he whispered back. "They might be around here in the near vici-" Then she
heard it and held up a hand to shush him.
Somewhere down the other hall came the most awful racket. It sounded like an electric sander
being taken to a bad Elvis impersonator's face.

Megamind stood up stiffly and drew his de-hydration gun from its holster, hastily switching hands
when his left quivered too much to be of any use to him. He gestured for Roxanne to get behind
him, his expression serious and focused. She was a little touched he would think to protect her,
despite his selfish and arrogant tendencies. Maybe he had some glimmer of good in him under all
the annoyances. For her part she picked up one of the numerous guitars Metroman had collected,
holding it by the neck like an axe. She edged behind him as he slipped down the hall, pressing the
wall.
He looked back at her and grimaced, gesturing for her to go back to the main room. She shook her
head. "What are you- Go back!" he hissed. "This could be dangerous!"
"Fat chance, you need back up," she whispered back, her fingers gripping the guitar tighter.
"But-! But you could get hurt," he looked so honestly pained at that prospect it melted some of the
ice around her heart. He put his hand over hers, lowering the instrument-turned-weapon to the
floor. "Please."
Okay, so he could be charming, she had to give him that. She steeled herself though and shook
her head. "No way."
That was when the singing and sanding noises stopped and they both froze, afraid to even breathe.
It seemed like an eternity before the sounds started again and they could both gasp quietly.
"Alright, fine, just...be careful," he frowned at her, letting her hands go and turning around to stalk
down the hallway.
"Can't let you have all the fun," she tried at a little humor to his retreating back.
He stopped and held up a hand just outside a doorway. She tensed, guitar at the ready. He cast her
a glance over his shoulder, nodded once, and they sprung out to either side of the doorway.
"HA!" Megamind defaulted to his usual laugh, brandishing his gun.
Roxanne gave a wordless cry, raising the guitar just in time to smash it directly into Metroman's
unsuspecting head. He dropped the electric sander he had been shaving with, looked at them both
in absolute shock, then at the splintered remains in Roxanne's hands - still vibrating from the
impact.
"NO! Not my Les Paul!" Metroman cried.
Roxanne and Megamind screamed. Then Megamind shot Metroman with the de-hydrate function,
which bounced off his skin and dehydrated the still running sander which had been creeping way
too close to Roxanne's toes for comfort. Then they screamed some more. Then they ran down the
hallway, through the main chamber, and clear up the stairs where they hurriedly shut the secret
trap door.
It took several minutes before they had sufficiently recovered enough to look at each other.
"Was that...?" Roxanne started.
"...A perfect clone? I was thinking the same thing!" Megamind's eyes widened. "This is
fascinating! And quite possibly bad."
"No, I mean was that-"

"-me?" Metroman asked sheepishly, opening the trap door with barely any effort behind it.
More screaming ensued.

Watercolour
When I'm too far gone, dead in the eyes of my friends.
Once the screaming, trying to escape, and throwing of various objects - Megamind had to admit
himself very impressed at Roxanne's strength, she had hurled that teacher's chair like a champion had ceased, it was time to pray to whatever deity might reign over Earth for a swift and painless
death. Megamind, for his part, stepped in front of Roxanne and hoped she had the sense to leap
through a window and run for the hills.
The mysterious clone approached and the blue alien swallowed, trying not to close his eyes as his
demise approached. It was so uncool to look as terrified as you felt in front of the girl of your
dreams.
He couldn't help it though and his eyes shut tight when the shadow fell over his face, blocking out
the sun. Then a long moment passed in which he did not, in fact, die. He cracked an eye open
experimentally to see the much scruffier looking carbon-copy staring at him with a marked
sadness.
"Uh...hey," said the creation of science.
"Hhheyy?" Megamind hazarded. Maybe this mad experiment gone horribly wrong was not a
threat, maybe it had no intelligence to speak of. That would be a blessing.
"You're alive?" Roxanne blurted behind him. He winced. So much for her leaping out the
window.
"I'm alive," responded the creature, unenthusiastically.
Alright, so it could be led to responses. That was a positive sign, maybe they could get it to fight
for them...
"But you're supposed to be dead! We saw your skeleton!" Roxanne sounded almost hysterical. He
glanced at her, concerned, and noted her face held more shock and fury than shock and...well,
shock. Medical shock.
"Yeah, about that..." the eldritch horror rubbed the back of its neck sheepishly. Megamind opted
to switch his theory; it either had more intelligence than he had hoped or it was something much
worse.
"You're alive?" he breathed. Impossible. "Are you a ghost?" He reached his shaking hand out and
touched the being's face, forcing the lips to contract. "Speak, apparition, tell us what you want..."
Metroman sighed and pulled his hand away with a familiar restrained strength. He could sense that
had the man contracted his fist a fraction more he may have had fractures to deal with. This was
the real deal.
Metroman looked between Megamind and Roxanne, weighing his options before sighing.
"Okay...Okay, okay, okay...You deserve an explanation. Come back inside, you might want a
drink for this."
Drinks turned out to be something called 'Jack and Coke', and it burned when it went down. But it
warmed his belly so strangely that he found himself halfway unable to really comprehend what

was being spelled out to them by Metroman, and mostly unable to really care about the 'why's and
'how's behind Metroman's mysterious non-death. Megamind glared at his arch rival's playfully
mussed hair, the way his face quirked in amusement when speaking of how he outsmarted
Megamind - as if! -, and the way his hands curled around the guitar he had pulled into his lap like
a security blanket. Even the rhinestone studded plush robe was not safe from his glower.
"-And Music Man was born! That way I could keep my logo."
"Causeofwha-?" Megamind had only heard parts of that whole thing.
"What?" Roxanne was enraged.
"Listen to this! I have eyes, that can see, right through le-e-e-ead!" Metroman sang tunelessly,
obviously overjoyed to have an audience.
Roxanne for her part hadn't take one sip of her drink and was yelling at him, making all those
angry noises he had rarely heard up until recently. Megamind stared at her backside, since she had
oh so conveniently placed herself in front of him to jab a finger into Metroman's chest. A smile he
wasn't aware of quirked across his face until they both turned to look at him and Roxanne slapped
a hand to her face.
"Ha," he managed, artfully. "What is this...beverage?" It came out considerably more slurred than
he had imagined it in his head. What was wrong with him?
"Oh for the love of God!" she exclaimed.
"Oh," Metroman blinked. "You okay, little buddy?"
"Ohhhh, fantastic! But I must ask, when did you get a room that spins?"
"You have to be kidding me," Roxanne hissed under her breath, rubbing her temples. "You have
got to be kidding me."
"I am not!" Megamind felt indignant. "Are you not seeing this? It's somewhat amazing really."
"Uh..." Metroman looked embarrassed. "Maybe I made them a little strong..."
"A little? I don't think there was even any coke in that! I could smell it from across the room,"
Roxanne was flapping her hands at Metroman. It was hilarious, he couldn't help the giggle that left
his throat. A manly giggle, of course.
"I'm sorry!" Metroman whined. Very unmanly.
"Sorry? Sorry doesn't cut it! You left us. You left all of us with...with him!" she gestured wildly at
Megamind. "No offense."
"Oh no, I'm totally with you," he swayed on the sofa.
"And now Titan is out there..." Roxanne trailed off, her face pinched with what looked like tears.
Megamind bolted to his feet, halfway fell back onto the sofa, and regained his balance to stride
over between Metroman and Roxanne. "He's destroying our - er - your city!"
"You have to do something..." Roxanne's voice sounded wet. Megamind felt his heart do some
kind of flip, but the bad kind of flip, the kind that made him feel sick to his stomach.
"Listen, I wish I could help you out but...I'm done," Metroman was rubbing the back of his neck

"Listen, I wish I could help you out but...I'm done," Metroman was rubbing the back of his neck
again. He reached out and caught Megamind's shoulders just as he was about to tilt sideways and
fall over.
"Listen, little buddy, if there's one thing I've learned...It's that if there's evil, good will rise up," he
fondly twisted said shoulders. The room tilted ninety-degrees to the left for the alien, and stayed
that way. "It took me a long time to find my calling, maybe it's about time you found yours,"
Metroman smiled.
Megamind grimaced and threw up all over Metroman's rhinestone studded house shoes.
Feeling significantly clearer in the head, Megamind followed Roxanne out into the sunlight. He
found himself immensely grateful for what nanomachines must have been left in his body taking
care of the toxins so quickly.
Roxanne had at least laughed a little at the horrified look on Metroman's face when he made his
hasty retreat to the bathroom. Then she had helped Megamind clean up a little bit, using one of
Metroman's other capes. They had left without saying goodbye to the previous hero.
"Well...Who needs him anyway!" Roxanne was a veritable well of confidence. Megamind envied
her. Once, he would have been able to simply bounce back like that. Now, having seen the man
he had always idealized as a paragon of good, a bastion which could never be broken, the wall of
justice he could constantly throw himself against reduced to writing awful music, hiding in a
basement, and generally being selfish...He was not quite as capable of her enthusiasm.
He was the bad guy. Bad guys lost, bad guys always lost. That had been one of two constants his
entire life; he did something bad and good, in the form of Metroman, always made sure he was
thwarted. Everything now felt completely meaningless, as though his entire life had been a joke.
And it was.
Oh, how it was. This entire time the city had not been quivering in terror, had not been impressed
by his ingenuity, had never felt even a speck of even grudging respect for him. He had been the
dunce, the butt of this whole cosmic joke all thirty-four years it took to get to the punch line. The
annoying nuisance that in the end had not even been worthy of a truce from his arch rival, who
had instead faked his death to get away from it all. It had taken just this one event for him to see
that clearly.
He didn't like it at all.
"I say we go back to the lair, grab some ray guns, hold them sideways, and just go all gangstah on
him!" Roxanne was saying. Did she realize how futile that was?
"We can't..." He sighed.
"That's what I'm talking abo- Wait, what? Why?" Roxanne looked surprised by his refusal. Was
he really that predictable?
"Look at me," he gestured at himself, remembering he still had Metroman's cape draped over his
shoulders. He struggled with it to take it off and ended up throwing it onto the ground.
"Yeah, I'm looking, so?" Roxanne frowned at the cape in the dirt.
"No just...Just look," he swung a hand at his bony frame. "I'm the bad guy. I don't save the day, I
don't fly off into the sunset, and I don't get the girl." The last part made his stomach twist
sickeningly again, in a way that had nothing to do with nanomachines or alcoholic beverages.

"But what happened to never giving up...?" Her voice trailed after him as he resolutely started to
make his way down the road to the bus stop he knew they passed earlier.
"Sometimes giving up is less...humiliating. I'm going home."
He left her clutching Metroman's cape, feeling just as lost as he was. For both of them, constants
had been broken.
The walk to the bus stop was long and tiring to his already weak legs, but he felt he had to punish
himself for a lot of things. For being so naive, for being such a horror to the city during his rule,
for creating a monster for his own selfish gain...for destroying nearly everything held near and
dear to the woman he still loved. For crushing her optimism.
For being such an asshole.
He sat down on the little bench by the lonely bus stop sign and waited for an hour, studying his
feet. The van had still not passed him by when the bus came, and the bus driver made no move to
contradict him when he commanded they go to Metro City Prison for the Criminally Gifted. He
just gave him a terrified glance and from that point on kept his eyes on the road. Other than the
driver the bus was mercifully bereft of passengers.
He sighed and rested his forehead against the cool window, watching as the streets went by.
Already there was a mass exodus out of the city, as though some strange occurrence had raised the
dead and the citizens were making their escape with naught but their lives and the clothes on their
backs.
He closed his eyes against the sight, knowing that, too, was his fault.
They stopped at the prison and he exited without a word, passed the guards at the gate without a
word, and offered his wrists up to the warden with a similar disregard for auditory definition. In
silence he was led to his cell, given his old prison uniform, changed his clothes, and was left to his
own devices with nothing but the television on the wall to keep him company. He couldn't say he
disliked the solitude. Not after today.
After today, he didn't deserve anyone in his life.

Hero
I am so high that I could hear heaven, but heaven don't hear me.
She watched as his back disappeared down the road, hugging the abandoned cape to her chest just
to have something there. She bit her lip in frustration and turned back to the school house,
weighing her options. She could go back to the lair and get some weapons herself, but she wasn't
sure if Megamind or the brainbots would let her in, nor was she sure what gun she would take if
she was forced to steal one. The de-hydration gun had bounced right off of Metroman's chest.
It struck her then that they had not even asked Metroman his weakness, the one thing that could
hurt him, and that seemed like as good a place as any to start. So she had headed back inside to
hold the most disappointing conversation she'd held to date.
He didn't know.
Metroman honestly did not know what his own weakness was. He had a super sense of smell, but
after being exposed to so many scents in the city for so long he had long since become
desensitized to it. He had super hearing, with similar results. At best chili dogs gave him gas,
techno music got on his nerves, and he hated the texture of bread pudding, but none of those
things helped her at all. So she left him with a sigh and slouched up the stairs to lean against the
news van, soaking up the sun while she thought about what to do.
What else could she do? It was up to her now. Both hero and villain had picked up their toys and
gone home, while Titan was out there still digging holes to China in the sandbox. Titan was not
going to stop either.
Maybe Hal would.
She swallowed the lump of fear in her throat - when had she ever been afraid before? - and
climbed into the van. She gripped the steering wheel and stared off at the city. She could do this.
She had been kidnapped so many times before that she felt so used to being in danger. This wasn't
a big deal, she told herself. It was silly to keep being so afraid of a former co-worker. She had
been tied up, knocked out, dangled over alligators, threatened with 'the horrors wrought by mad
science,' and dragged to God-knows-where so many times, she had lost count ages ago.
It was her turn to save the day. No one else would.
"We now have new reports. Titan, first thought to be this city's new hero, has turned evil. The city
has never seen this level of destruction. If only Metroman were still alive..."
Minion's gills flapped in distress at the television's announcement. Granted the reception wasn't so
good, nor the lighting, in the tiny little hotel room, but it got the job done. He had expected that
Hal Stewart was a bad choice for a hero, but he had never expected such wanton destruction. His
boss might not always be the genius with the most common sense in the world, but he had never
gone this far.
He ground his teeth, thinking back. When he had first left the lair, after the argument with Sir, he
had been in a hurry. Unfortunately he was also very conspicuous, what with the evil segway and
the giant robotic gorilla suit.
He had first gone to City Hall, intent on at least using the empty building as a good place to stop
and think, but in the end it had reminded him too much of the time spent together rampaging

through the streets.

So he had, instead, put some of their pilfered money into his Face Melter lunch box - a gift from
Sir several years back, before this had even started - and gone to find a hotel room. But no one
rents to robotic gorilla fish on evil segways. Most innkeepers had screamed and run away, called
the police, or both. So, after wasting almost two hours on all of that he had returned to the lair,
greeting the brainbots warmly when they came to see who it was.
They had never been quite as interested in him as they were in Sir, but they clustered around him
regardless and made no protest when he seized one and hugged it gently to his chest. He petted its
dome lightly and went back to the dressing room to stare at the unfinished parts of the Black
Mamba, his magnum opus. Sewing always did make him feel better...
A couple more hours later and it was done. All it had really needed were some minor cosmetic
changes; a little more shaping to the shoulder pads, the spikes added artfully, and the collar
finished. He held it up to admire it, then sighed. He still didn't feel forgiving towards Sir. The
sewing had only gotten his mind off of what the issue really was, not made him think on it all that
much. Never had he felt so betrayed by the one he served, but then again they had always only
had each other. With the addition of Ms Ritchie, their whole dynamic was changing drastically.
He gave it to the brainbots to place it in the case he'd had them make a month ago and frowned
down at his hands, so precisely manufactured with Sir's own hands. One of those hands reached
out and took his flakes from the lunch box, sprinkling some into the water for him to snack on.
He chewed thoughtfully, crossing to the weapons case and removing the spare disguise watch. He
didn't dislike Ms Ritchie; not at all in fact. He was really very attached to her and had always
enjoyed how she seemed to make Sir all the more focused in the here and now when she was was
present. Most of time Sir was all over the place, thinking too fast to keep up with his ideas.
Usually Minion just listened patiently until Sir had a solid plan, which Minion would then assist
in. It was an endless cycle, really.
But with Ms Ritchie present, he was engaging her directly. Never talking at her, but to her,
enjoying the back and forth with someone not obligated to serve him by divine purpose. Minion
had appreciated the change. Plus, she liked his cooking, and he found that immensely pleasing.
His cupcakes were his pride and joy; that, and his clothing design. Being complimented on either
one had always made him swell with pride.
No, Ms Ritchie was perfect for Sir. Intellectually stimulating and able to ground him in reality.
What had bothered him was the fact Sir was lying to her, which would inevitably lead to her
finding out - after all, she was very smart - and both her and Sir being hurt. Worse yet, Minion
could not be sure Sir would understand why.
He sighed again and held out the watch, flicking through the various disguises programmed into it.
Sir himself was the first - the only one they had managed to get to reproduce eye color, after hours
of tinkering with it. It had been decided eye color wasn't worth spending that much time on if the
disguise wasn't meant to be used very often. Then came a cat (the worst idea they'd had, since the
cat didn't have thumbs to change the dial, nor did they wear watches) and, following that, a
random woman that had been scanned on the fly to test its capabilities at scanning from a distance.
He sighed and opted for the last one, since it was the last disguise they'd put on this one.
The sound of the door opening startled him, and he quickly put the watch on and changed his
form to the much quieter human woman.
"Alright, Minion!" Sir's voice had echoed through the lair. He hadn't stayed to hear what Sir had
to say, he had just ducked out one of the multiple entrances and into the cold rain.

Now, though, he regretted not staying. Not having been there for Sir, who could possibly be...He
shook his head to clear such thoughts. Impossible. It wouldn't do to even entertain the idea a little
bit.
Right now, the city was in peril and Sir was the only one even vaguely capable of stopping it,
however unlikely. Minion could not sit here in the hotel room and wait until the whole of Metro
City was reduced to ash. As much as it had mistreated Sir and himself, it was still their home.
He had a pretty good idea of where Sir would be anyway.
"...Unless someone comes to our aide soon, all will be lost."
Metroman listened to the radio broadcast in silence, staring at his old costume, his old label.
Everything he had rejected to do what he had always wanted to do.
If Megamind didn't step up, didn't fulfill everything he had always known he could, everything
would be for naught. His entire charade would come crashing down, but he would have to go
back.
He would have to admit he ran in the first place.
"-bringing more rain with this line of stor-"
Click. Boring.
"-down in the valley-"
Click. He had already missed his favorite soap. Darnn. Joan was about to hear Aaron's proposal,
too.
"-extraordinary events taking place in Me-"
Click. Extraordinary indeed.
"-ext on the Price is Ri-!"
Click. He'd always liked Bob Barker better, he was a better showman.
"Megamind!"
Click. Let the 'hero' deal with it.
"-Just look at the little guy go!"
He'd always liked that squirrel. His finger paused over the remote, ready to change the station.
Maybe her better see what this so-called super villain had to say. Maybe Metroman would come to
his senses and he would get to enjoy seeing the traitorous Titan get his butt handed to him like it
should have been.
Click.
"We have some unfinished business!"
Yes, of course we do, he thought with a sneer. At least Titan's villainous dialog was improving
from incoherent screaming. It could still be better, but who was the cosmic joke to judge?

"Meet me at Metro Tower in one hour."

A time limit, very typical. Good move, Titan. He was showing some improvement in this area at
least.
"Oh, and just so you don't get cold feet..."
His heart froze in a block of ice, no he couldn't... But of course, there she was. Roxanne. Titan
had Roxanne tied to the tower, 3,172 feet in the air. Of course, how could he have been so stupid?
He had put her in danger from the very second he admitted to being 'Bernard.' He hardly heard
Titan taunting her to call out for him. He could only sit and listen to her in horrified silence,
cursing himself for being so abysmally stupid.
One hour. He had one hour to get to her before Titan made her into a quivering pile of goo on the
street. He had no doubts whatsoever that Titan would follow through, either.
"Roxanne..." her name fell from his lips unbidden, without title or formality to hide behind.
"One hour, Metro Tower. Don't keep me waiting," Titan's face filled the screen before it dissolved
into fuzz.
"Warden, warden!" he cried, tripping over the chair in his haste to get the door, plastering himself
against it. "You have to let me go! Titan must be stopped!"
The warden paused, having been looking at the control panel just outside. "Just wait," he said, his
brown eyes narrowing slightly at him before returning to the panel.
"I can't wait! She can't wait!" Megamind was shaking, his fingers scrabbling at the glass uselessly.
"Don't make the city pay for my mistakes! My God, if it's what you want...Iamsorry for what I've
done! Please, please, let me make it right!"
The breath in his chest came fast and short. "Don't make her pay for my problems..."
"Just sit down," the warden gestured for him to back away. "I can't think straight with your
yelling," he muttered.
"Please," he whispered as he backed away from the door and sat down. He buried his face in his
hands, knowing he was hyperventilating and not really caring at this point. A dampness he hadn't
known since he was a child -before the angry teenager, before the villain, before he had been able
to rationalize everything- filled his palms.
He didn't even hear the door open, nor did he hear Minion enter without his disguise in place.
When a heavy, metal hand rested on his shoulder he looked up bleary eyed.
"Minion?" he croaked, rubbing his cheeks on the back of his sleeve.
"I'm still not happy with you, and not just for my own sake." Minion frowned. "But we can talk
about it later. Right now, Ms. Ritchie needs our help, and I'm sort of fond of her myself, so let's
go."
"Oh, you fantastic fish, you..." Megamind cracked a smile.
Minion returned it toothily. "What are we waiting for? We've get a distressed damsel to rescue."
Together they walked arm in arm out the prison doors, laughing at the absurdity of it all.

"Good luck, boys!" the real warden called behind them.

"We're gonna die!" Megamind called back cheerfully.
"Ha ha h-!" Minion paused. "Wait, what?"

Savin' Me
With these broken wings I'm falling, and all I see is you. These city walls ain't got no love for me.
Megamind was not exactly sure why, when they stepped outside the prison gates, he had expected
the invisible car to be waiting. Thankfully, Minion had procured a cab for them. Unfortunately, he
had done it with his disguise on, so as soon as they stepped out of the prison and climbed inside
the car the cabbie jumped out of the car and began to run for it.
"Oh, honestly!" Megamind huffed, scooting over and adjusting the seat. "It's so hard to find good
help these days!"
"Uh, sir, maybe I should drive?" Minion offered, hopefully.
"Nonsense!" Megamind growled, whipping the car around sharply enough that everything on the
right side of the car - including Minion - found itself abruptly on the left side. Megamind did not
appear to notice this as he gunned the engine and made the tires screech in protest. Minion
winced.
"Alright, this is the plan..." Megamind began to explain, oblivious to Minion's terror as he swung
in and out of traffic all the way to the lair.
"You have the plan?" Megamind draped an elbow over the front seat to peer over his shoulder at
Minion.
"Y-Yeah," Minion shivered, popping open the door and stepping out onto blessed, blessed ground
inside the lair. He resisted the urge to bend and kiss it through his dome.
"Excellent!" Megamind leaped from the front seat, not bothering to shut the door behind him as he
bolted up the stairs to one of the catwalks, retrieving the jetcycle from its floating parking place
near the entrance. "Now, you will have to do a convincing impression of me! I am sure it will be
devastatingly difficult, but I am sure that you can pull it off for just a bit," he called as he brought
the cycle around.
Minion tried very hard not to roll his eyes. "Yeah, of course. Very hard."
"But, we shouldn't get hung up on those details. Get the pieces of the power suit, I know it's not
complete but the parts will be usable at least..." He bit his lip and looked up at the brainbots
hovering around him.
"You three," he pointed out the foremost. "JNY-5, ROB-3, and KLA-2. I want you to modify one
of your number into a suitable jet pack. Gather the appropriate parts and begin production in the
back seat there," he pointed back at the cab.
The first, JNY-5, tipped a tendril up in a salute and scurried off to gather the supplies. ROB-3
opened the door and slipped inside, where KLA-2 proceeded to begin removing what parts were
unneeded for the modification.
That under way Megamind hurried to change his clothes; it wouldn't do at all to wear even the
parts of a power suit over cotton fiber that could potentially catch fire. The spandex and leather
would protect his skin better. As an afterthought he added his gun holster with the dehydration
gun, it could come in handy. By the time that was done Minion had the parts in the car, the
brainbots were busy modifying ROB-3, and the rest of the brainbots were flitting around in a
hurry to get the needed accouterments.

hurry to get the needed accouterments.

He stopped for just a second to take in the activity going on around him and bit his lip. This would
be the best performance they had ever given in all his career as a villain, and here they were doing
it for something distinctly un-villain-like. Something to think about later.
"Minion! Do you need me any longer?" He yelled into the lair, unsure where the fish had gone to.
"No, I'm good! Meet at Metro Tower as soon as possible, right?" His own voice greeted him from
around the corner.
"Correct." Megamind nodded, peering around a bank of monitors to give Minion a final once
over. He narrowed his eyes and put a thumb to his chin. His left arm was still shaking a little and
he found it irritating.
"Alright, don't stand like you're heavy. You're light on your feet, move like a..." He waved a hand
on the air, looking for the word.
"...Snake?" His double offered, flicking a hand out expressively with a sly smile.
"Ugh." He couldn't suppress the shudder of revulsion. "I was going to say, um...That line about
floating like a wasp and stinging like a member of Lepidoptera, but if snake helps you more..."
"I don't think that's the...You know, yeah, snake helps me better." His double turned with a
flourish and whipped the cape up to hide his face behind.
Megamind nodded approvingly. "If it works, just keep doing...all of this," he gestured at himself
before checking his watch. "Enough wasting time! I shall meet you at the Tower."
He turned to go and thought better of it, twisting back around and clasping his hands on Minion's
shoulders, staring directly into his own acid green eyes. "Don't die, Minion. Consider it an order.
And...I'm sorry. For everything."
Minion grinned with his face and clasped his shoulder in return. "Apology accepted, but we still
need to talk about all this later. I don't intend to die, either. Be careful out there, Boss."
Megamind sniffed and rubbed at his eye. "Oh, look at this, I have something in my eye now.
Remind me we need to dust more when we get back!" He yelled over his shoulder as he was
ducking away and heading for the car.
"Sure thing, Sir!" Minion called at his back.
The drive to Metroman's hideout was halted very abruptly by the fact traffic was backed up from
the bridge all the way back into the city.
"Oh, what is all this?" Megamind slammed his palms to the steering wheel after five minutes of
straining his neck to see how far the traffic went on. It appeared endless.
"Are you almost done back there?" He asked over his shoulder, not turning his head in case they
were welding.
A small electronic noise of dubious nature answered his question. It would be a little bit, but they
were almost there.
"Alright, well, I gotta move it. You have the coordinates of my intended location, right?"
A buzz to the affirmative.

"Great," he sighed and gripped the steering wheel until his knuckles turned white under the gloves
before getting out of the car. "Wish Daddy luck," he patted the hood of the car before walking
away from it and towards a bored looking guy on a moped.
"You there, distinctly disinterested looking citizen! I need that," he pointed at the moped;
obnoxiously yellow and completely unimpressive, but it would do for now. The guy, predictably,
jumped off the moped and backed away with his hands in the air. Megamind plopped himself
down on it without further comment, tucked his cape underneath him so it wouldn't get caught,
and began the agonizing process of weaving between cars on his way to Metroman's hideout.
It took twenty minutes to get through the cars far enough to get over onto the shoulder. From there
he increased his speed drastically and pushed the vehicle as fast as he could safely go, passing by
astonished motorists in a hurry. As soon as he reached empty streets, he increased to a decidedly
unsafe speed far over the speed limit. Still, by the time he reached Metroman's place, he knew he
had about fifteen minutes to get what he needed and get back to the city. Thankfully, the brainbotcum-jetpack ROB-3 should be complete by that time and make his journey all the more swift on
the return.
He slowed just enough to let him escape without harm, flung the moped down, and hit the ground
running. He flung the bell on the teacher's desk back and slid through the trap doors' gap before it
had even fully opened. The door he unlocked without flourish and strode into Metroman's swanky
living room without preamble.
"I need your image, your old image," he demanded of the shocked former hero, who had been in
the middle of staring at one of his old pictures. The news was playing on the radio nearby, barely
registering to Megamind. He held up his disguise watch meaningfully.
"I...Little buddy, I..." Metroman rubbed the back of his neck, setting down the picture.
"I need it, and if you aren't going to cooperate, I may just find a way to reallykillyou." He was
serious. Too much hinged on this; Roxanne's life was in danger, not to mention the city.
Metroman straightened, surprised at the villain's tone of voice. He had never heard Megamind
speak with such honest conviction and anger before.
"Go shave, comb your hair, put on your old costume, and just stand there. That's all you need to
do," his voice rose in octave slightly, desperately. "I have about 10 minutes to save Roxanne
Ritchie from certain death and I will be damned if you stop me."
Metroman opened his mouth to protest, but stopped at the venomous glare Megamind leveled
directly into his eyes. His jaw shut with a sharp clack and he appeared to not move at all, just
abruptly appearing in uniform with combed hair and sander in hand. Without pause he turned to
plug the sander in, shaving off the remainder of his beard.
Megamind let out a sigh of relief. "Oh, spectacular. Thank you," he said breathlessly.
Metroman smiled faintly over his shoulder, putting the sander down. "Yeah, you're welcome..."
he trailed off. It was a little awkward to be really friendly with the guy who just threatened to kill
you, in a much more serious fashion than ever previously.
Megamind scanned him quickly as he was speaking, catching his vocal recording as well. Too
bad he didn't have time to fix the eyes, but hopefully Titan wouldn't look close enough or
remember what color Metroman's eyes were. He twisted on his heel and ran back up the stairs to
the waiting brainbots.

"Alright, ROB-3, you're going to have to be intuitive about this," he gave his instructions as the
other two were helping him strap ROB-3 to his back. "No noises, it'll destroy the illusion. So, do
your best."
He reached over his shoulder to pat the modified brainbot on the dome. It vibrated against his
back, using subsonic noise to acknowledge him.
"Not even subsonic, he has super hearing." The noise stopped just as the other two brainbots were
sliding the power gloves over his arms and strapping them in place. Still a little loose, but it was
the best he had for now.
With that he turned the watch dial, changing his image over, and jumped into the air. ROB-3 took
the hint, initiated his boosters, and away they went at a significantly faster pace than he had first
arrived. They were two minutes late and across the bay they could see the dark smog that would
serve to mask the thousands of brainbots hiding inside and behind the dirigible. Even from this
distance, the beginning chords of WelcometotheJungle were faintly audible. Megamind silently
congratulated Minion on his excellent choice of fighting music; the fish always did have a knack
for presentation.
Behind them, Metroman watched his copy and two brainbots zip towards the city and whispered a
soft 'good luck' at their backs.

Never Again
Been there before, but not like this. Seen it before, but not like this.
Truth be told, the prospect of masquerading as his boss had made him both giddy and nervous.
Giddy because it gave him the freedom to be as over the top as possible, and nervous because his
acting skills were being tested in a life or death scenario.
Minion sighed at the mirror as Sir left - being far too hard on an engine not designed by him of
course - and hoped that Titan was as much of a fool as he had pegged him as. After all, he had
fallen for the Space-Stepmom disguise, and that was saying something. Minion had tested him,
and he had not passed.
He flexed his arms, turning his wrists up and down with finesse, enjoying how much more lithe
Sir's form was. Sir was right: he was light on his feet, and it was hard to get used to after spending
the majority of his time weighing as much as four times as much as he did now. In the human
female form it was just assumed he was angry, the way he put his feet down. In Sir's form it
looked very wrong.
Minion closed his eyes, rubbed his impressive forehead, and groaned. Hopefully, Titan would be
just as easy to fool in this as last time. Regardless of how well he was adapted to this body, he had
no more time to waste.
"Brainbots!" He called, and got down to brass tacks explaining the plan to the mass of blinking
lights.
Thirty minutes later the rigid framed dirigible was fully inflated and being launched, filled to the
brim with brainbots. Too many for Minion to operate the dirigible himself, in fact. As a result the
brainbots took over flying duties, while Minion mingled in the crowd in the back and closed his
eyes against the glaring blue lights all around him. He cursed Sir's eyes for this and was reminded
why Sir preferred it dim most of the time. Behind the massive zeppelin more brainbots kept close,
carrying the jetcycle with them.
The going was slow, agonizingly so. Minion had to command them to keep down low, between
the skyscrapers, so as not to attract attention by their engine noise. Visibility wasn't a problem
since Sir had the foresight to install an invisibility mechanism every twenty feet along the entire
frame of the zeppelin. Their progress was slowed by the fact most of the roads were simply not
wide enough to accommodate the airship, even flying it sideways. In the past there had been much
more time to prepare for a scheme, more time to inflate the balloon, and more time to navigate the
city. Now, though, it had Minion on edge. If they didn't make it in time it could cost Ms. Ritchie
her life, and he couldn't let her down like that.
"Speed us up to one hundred thirty meters per if you can, but try not to knock into any buildings,"
he commanded, feeling the engines respond beneath the cabin floor. Hopefully, they had enough
saltpeter left over to pull this off, their supply had not been renewed since the last time they'd used
the smoke effect. At the very least, he knew they had enough smoke bombs and brainbots to carry
them for the second half of the effect.
Roxanne struggled against the street sign wrapped around her at the top of the tower, barely
hearing Hal as he flew around her with camera in hand. Even in June the cool breeze off the Great
Lakes bit at her, turning the metal cool against her arms. She couldn't help being scared; she was
shaking and could feel her stomach churning. Hal might very well kill her soon.

Hal who had been her partner for years. Hal whose awkward come-ons were occasionally funny
enough they had both shared a laugh from opposite sides of the equation. Hal who had invited her
to coffee every other day. Hal who had, three weeks ago, been stung by a bee and the next day
claimed he had a family emergency to take care of out of state.
It registered then that Hal had thrown the camera over his shoulder and was flying away. She
breathed a sigh of relief, trying to wriggle her arms free. Maybe if she could get her arms out she
could try pulling the rest of her out from her bindings.
The sigh died in her throat when the rumble of concrete and glass being torn through far beyond
her line of sight reached her ears. The tower gave a sickening lurch and the world shifted fifteen
degrees forward. Roxanne felt her stomach leap into her throat when she saw the streets below.
It was all she could do to even yell out in terror and remember to breathe. "Hal!"
When Hal reappeared she stared at him, glassy eyed and quaking.
"Oh God, oh God. Hal, please don't do this. Please. Oh God. Please, Hal, I know there is still
good in you..." She could feel the tears coming, choking her, making her babble. Roxanne was a
proud woman, but anyone would be frightened if the 3,172 foot tower underneath them suddenly
felt so precarious.
"You're so naive, Roxy," Hal shook his head, knitting his brow as if in pity for her. "You see the
good in everyone, even when it's not there!" He pressed forward, hands clenched. "You are living
a fantasy!"
Roxanne dropped her eyes, unable to look up any more. A fantasy. She knew he was right; she
should have realized something was up with Hal when he was gone for three weeks, she should
have realized Bernard had Megamind's voice, had worn the same clothes every time they
met...And yet she had not. She had seen exactly what she had wanted to see; an annoying
coworker gone, and a charming museum curator with an oddly familiar voice and a singular taste
in fashion.
"-And there is no Queen of England!" Hal glowered down at her, where he had once looked up at
her.
She raised her eyes briefly to scan his face, incredulous at how undereducated he was.
"You need to wake up!" He snarled, leaning forward and opening his mouth to say more.
Behind him a guitar echoed through the street as smoke and the top of a balloon rose up to blot out
the sky. Roxanne raised her gaze to stare at it, wide-eyed and praying for it to be who she thought
it was.
Minion exhaled loudly, having not realized he had been holding his breath since they had watched
Titan rip into the side of the tower. If they had been found out before they were ready it could
have been devastating to the whole plan. He quickly began issuing his last minute orders to the
milling robotic AIs.
"Raise us up by one hundred twenty-two meters, set hover level with lower tower platform.
Initiate smoke screen procedure with de-cloak, circle around the tower when we are hovering.
Give us some cover. Use the lasers, make it as distracting as possible. Jetcycle should be stationed
about eight meters below the head, cushion me when I fall so this body doesn't get hurt. And that
tower looks unstable, so try to slow it down if you can."
He took a deep breath, put in his earplugs - doubling as communications devices in this case - and

hit 'play'. "Alright, places everyone. It's showtime. In five..four...three...two..."

He turned on the microphone.
"You dare challenge Megamind?" came a voice through the clouds, the outline of his head visible
in the growing cloud of smoke. Roxanne's heart soared even as the tower lurched forward again,
the speakers dampening the scream of protesting steel. A small swarm of brainbots flitted into the
cloud from underneath, several stopping closer to them.
"There's only room for one super villain in this town!" Titan was barely audible above her, so she
assumed the brainbot nearest them was funneling the sound.
"Oh, you're a villain alright...Just not a super one!" From the cloud a very familiar giant blue head
emerged, grinning at Hal and looking down its nose. Roxanne let herself grin; there was no way
he would come unprepared. There was no way she couldn't be saved.
"Yeah, what's the difference?" Hal sneered.
As the music reached a crescendo the mouth on the giant head opened and Megamind himself
strode forward, stepping lightly on the brainbots like he was just crossing a river on some rocks.
No big deal.
"Presentation!" His hands flicked up to gesture at the show around him, and he grinned like the
cat that caught the canary. Roxanne knew this had to be a trap, to goad him into action. But she
had to admit, it was his best yet.
Hal fell for it, hook, line, and sinker. He dove forward just as Megamind disappeared into the
mass of brainbots, and was shortly encased in the head's mouth. Roxanne couldn't see where the
blue alien had gone, but knew it wouldn't be long before Hal was free. She wriggled harder
against the sign, but he had molded it close to her body. The tower shifted forward again, and
around her brainbots came from around the sides of the nearly-hidden zeppelin to grab onto it and
slow its descent.
Just as she slipped an elbow upwards Megamind reappeared, riding some kind of flying
motorcycle that looked to have a jet's engine grafted to the front.
"I knew you'd come back!" She yelled over the engine noise and booming music. She was
relieved to see his left arm wasn't shaking with tremors anymore.
"Well, that makes one of us," he called back. Minion had honestly been terrified he wouldn't make
it to the bike. He reached out and grabbed the sign, pulling on it just in time to remember this body
didn't have the strength of his natural form. It didn't even shudder in place. He pulled the
dehydration gun from its holster, dehydrated the metal, and seized Roxanne by the arm as the
tower gave another jerk forward. More brainbots joined their brethren.
Behind them there was an explosion and a shockwave that rocked the jetcycle to the side. She saw
Megamind's eyes widen and his grip tightened on her arm, pulling her forward. She stumbled and
saw her foot dangling over thin air.
Strangling a scream, she scrambled into his lap and grabbed the sides of his cape to keep close as
he gunned the engine and took off, diving towards the street so fast she almost felt faint. She had a
clear view over his shoulder; parts and smoking detritus were raining from the sky, the brainbots
that were not disintegrated were recovering their flight, and Titan was flying towards the tower,
taking it from the brainbots there...Turning it and taking out the top thirteen floors of the Powers
Building next door...

A spear.
A gigantic, inescapable spear.
"Wh-What's the plan?" she faltered, her fingers gripping the black silk so tight she was afraid she
would rip clean through it. Her voice sounded muffled and thick, her head was ringing, and the
pain in her ears was excruciating.
He looked over his shoulder and gunned the engine again. "-Mostly involves not dying!" His
voice was nearly stolen by the wind and the ringing in her ears as they popped, abruptly making
everything less muffled.
"That's a good plan, I like that plan," she shouted, lamely. He didn't answer, just leaned forward
and pressed them faster. She closed her eyes against his chest, just trying not to throw up.
She felt the huge gust of air before she felt the blow of the tower's antennae brushing against the
back of the bike. She choked on dust before she could scream. The brush was just enough to
throw them off balance, slam them into the ground, and break something inside the bike. She
didn't even hear the sound of the concrete being torn from one end of Central Street to the other,
all she could sense was the sting of tiny missiles hitting her bare arms and the rabbit-fast heartbeat
pounding in her throat. Her limbs stiffened painfully. They were going to die.
"-Can't control it!" Megamind was yelling somewhere far away. All she could see was black and
blue. He moved under her and pried an arm away from his torso, gripping her arm so tight it hurt.
"Relax your body! Relax everything, go limp!" he screamed, shaking her back into reality.
How the hell do I do that? She wondered, looking back up and seeing, but not really seeing him.
He shook her again and she, with a lot of willpower, let go and went as limp as she could.
Then, to her amazement, he flung her. Granted, he took both hands off the bike to do so, but he
still threw her like a rag doll. She hit an awning and bounced, trying to stay as limp as she possibly
could. The instinct to catch herself took over, though. The brick of the building scraped her ankle
as she went by, rasping away the skin like teeth. The last awning gave away underneath her and
she rolled down it to land on blessed ground with a not so blessed jarring to her shoulder. Pins and
needles traveled from her palm into her shoulder and back again. She looked at the sidewalk
where, had she not caught herself, her head might have blossomed like a gruesome flower.
She let out a single weak laugh born of hysteria, before she realized she heard nothing but the
ringing in her ears and she was still in danger. They were still in danger. Dust clogged her lungs
and filled her mouth with the taste of dirt and grime. Choking, she looked up to see the outline of
the tower stopped not forty feet from where she lay and got up on shaky legs, covering her mouth
and stumbling through the dust and debris.
Then she saw him, collapsed against the fountain behind a chunk of the street, the pole a dagger in
his side for certain.
"No..." She managed to whisper brokenly.
Behind her a whoosh of air signaled Hal's arrival, clearing away the dust and blowing it down the
side streets. She turned and looked at him, frozen, unable to move. He was saying something to
her, and she couldn't hear it past the bells in her ears and the rush in her head.
When he kicked the destroyed bus at her all she could do was fall to her knees and cover her head,
gripping her hair with a sob of devastation.

Showdown
I thought you'd understand. That's over, ahead of the line you'll be joining in the sand.
Roxanne had to admit herself surprised when agonizing death did not make itself known. She
looked up, shaking, and saw a familiar white clad back where there should have been a bus.
"You came back," she gasped. He came back alright, he came back too late. Behind her
Megamind lay dying, while he got to stroll in and be the hero. What gave him the right? she
wondered.
"I never should have left." Metroman smiled over his shoulder, oblivious to her conflicting
opinion.
"I thought you were dead, man!" Hal said somewhere she couldn't see. All she could do was stare
at the back of this man who had left them all for dead.
"Rumors of my death were greatly exaggerated," she could hear Metroman's smile. "So! You're
the punk I've heard about."
He cracked his knuckles so loud Roxanne could hear it from where she was, flexing his legs and
releasing a burst of power that blew dust back like a shock wave.
Hal, for his part, let out a cry of fear and bolted, Metroman following him like a shot after
crouching low to the ground and leaping. He must have been out of shape to need to do that.
Roxanne watched them go for a brief second before taking her chance and jumping over some
rubble to get to Megamind, her heart in her throat once more. She vaguely registered her
protesting ankle and the rubble under her bare foot - she couldn't remember when she had lost her
other slipper - as being painful in the periphery of her mind.
Then, all of a sudden, there he was. The pole hadn't gone in deep, but she could tell it was far
enough. For some reason his blood was black, and oozed like oil. She leaned closer and touched
his face, feeling his cool skin against hers like ice on fire.
"I'm sorry, I did my best," he groaned, eyes slitted in pain.
"I'm so proud of you..." she whispered, trying not to choke on the words. The world blurred
behind her tears. She heard crackling and the texture of his face turned to cutting glass and slime
coated scales.
"Minion?" she drew back slightly, wincing as the glass sliced into her palm. The fish was no
better off; a gash in his side was leaking blood slowly, and his fins were much more torn than
usual.
"Surprise," he managed weakly. "He's the real hero." As he spoke his voice grew weaker and he
flapped his fins in distress, looking pointedly at the fountain until Roxanne took the hint and
dropped him into it. As Minion sank to the bottom, gulping water, she looked back to the skies
where Metroman was chasing Hal through the streets.
"Megamind?" she ventured.
Megamind had nearly panicked at the sight of Metro Tower dislodging itself before his eyes, and
flying through the air like the largest projectile he had ever seen. His left arm trembled ferociously

and he clenched his fist to try and keep control of it, straightening his back to cue ROB-3 to speed
up. So it was, with his heart in his throat, that he had arrived just in time to land in front of a
screaming Roxanne.
He had never once made her scream like that, because he had never wanted to. The fact that Titan
had reduced this strong, intelligent woman to incoherency filled him with a rage he had never
known before that moment.
He flexed his wrist and felt the shifting of the now-rotating blade where it had merged with the
physical portions of the disguise - he had to replicate Metroman's strength, and the watch alone
could not do that despite its extensive abilities. The bus split, like running a hot knife through
butter. He silently congratulated himself for thinking to install a sonic blade on his prototype
instead of a regular saw blade; it would not have worked nearly as well. He slipped easily into a
suitably heroic pose as the two sides slid past him in twin tails of sparks.
He straightened and smirked at Titan. "Please, let's have a little respect for public transportation."
Not his best material, but he was impersonating Metroman, after all. The man had a long-standing
reputation for the occasional laying on of thick cheese.
Behind him Roxanne stirred, questioning him softly. He tried his best to reassure her before
turning back to Titan. He had already decided that it would be best if she thought he really was
Metroman, and if he just disappeared after all of this. Better for her, better for him. Better for the
city too, probably. It registered that Minion was not with Roxanne, and while this was cause for
concern he couldn't let it consume him too much as Titan was making a break for it and he wanted
to be sure he left the city.
So began the game of cat and mouse, wherein for once he had the upper hand entirely. He chased
Titan through the streets, keeping up with ease thanks to ROB-3's excellent responses to his subtle
cues. It was easy, almost too much so.
Titan landed just in front of the fountain, having looped back to the plaza where they had started.
"If you know what's good for you, Titan..." Megamind started, advancing for every step back
Titan took.
Titan seized a hot dog cart from a street corner and flung it. Megamind sidestepped it and
continued to advance, catching a hold of Titan's cape when he turned to try and fly away. He
grunted, thankful that the power glove was adding to his overall strength. Titan slid on the rubble
and Megamind was able to just barely grab a hold of his collar, pulling back a fist threateningly.
"As I was saying! If you know what's good for you, you'll stay out of Metrosity!" he snarled.
"Not the face!" Titan held up his hands, leaning away from him. "Yeah, sure! You got it!"
Megamind narrowed his eyes and let go of his collar, watching as he zipped away into the
distance. It didn't solve the problem, but it got him out of the city until he could come up with a
permanent solution that hopefully did not involve dying. He breathed out a sigh of relief and
floated towards the fountain, and Roxanne. He winced, seeing Minion's body, but spied him in the
actual water feature itself. Which meant his cover was blown to Roxanne, which meant he could
not disappear.
"Is it you?" Roxanne was staring at him, kneeling beside Minion's ruined suit. She was shaking
and looked like she had seen better days.
He swallowed and looked to her, opening his mouth to explain, but even as the words were

forming he felt the air rush around him. He ducked just in time for a car to sail overhead and land
in the building across the street.
Turning confirmed the worst: Titan had come back. He narrowed his eyes at the super-powered
cameraman. "I thought I told you to get out of the city."
"Metrocity. I only know one person who calls this city Metrosity. Pretty sneaky sis," Titan
sneered, picking up another car to throw, which Megamind dodged again.
"Metro City, I said Metro City, you deaf buffoon!" Megamind snapped, desperate. He began to
back up into the street, drawing him away from Roxanne.
"Then why are you dodging everything? You chicken?" Titan advanced, eyes aglow.
"Just getting some fighting room." Megamind gestured expansively at the more open center of the
plaza. Just in time for Titan to burn holes through his cape. He batted at them, praying the disguise
generator didn't glitch as a result.
While he was preoccupied, Titan's laser vision turned to a car, burning right through the chassis
and into the gas tank. It exploded with a whoomph, knocking Megamind flat onto the concrete
and taking the breath out of his lungs. He heard Roxanne yell a warning, but was unable to move
before Titan was upon him. He felt the back of his cape being grabbed and he was lifted bodily.
For a brief moment he was airborne before he hit concrete once more, not able to hold back a soft
cry of pain. At least one of his ribs was broken, and he had no idea how far he had been thrown.
He rolled onto his back, blinked open his eyes, and saw sky. And Titan leering down at him.
"Looks like you aren't so tough after all, huh?" He smirked, putting one booted foot over his left
hand, slowly pressing down.
Megamind shrieked, feeling the bones in his wrist pop. The watch fractured, the glass and metal
pressing into his wrist as the disguise faltered and faded away. All of a sudden the foot was gone
and Megamind was free to cradle his injured limb to his chest, gasping in agony as the motion
disturbed his ribs. Titan's hands came back, grabbing hold of him and shaking him so hard he felt
his neck tense from the strain.
"Not so tough!" Titan laughed, the pitch in a disturbing range between hysteria and anger.
"You're just a skinny little nerd!"
"Hal! Hal stop, you're killing him!" Roxanne yelled from somewhere.
Without warning he was thrown, the world circling crazily. His hands flailed, grabbing for
something, anything, to stop the fall. He caught just the bare edge of an awning in his right hand,
slowing him enough that the brick wall behind it did not simply smash his face in. It wasn't
enough to keep him from slipping down onto the sidewalk, where he lay panting for breath and
shaking.
He clenched his right hand against the cool sidewalk and pushed himself upright, trying not to put
pressure onto his mangled left hand. He found himself suddenly grateful that the generator had
stayed intact long enough to keep the power armor from being crushed as well; it was keeping his
hand relatively stable.
Titan was advancing across the street, taking his time to stroll towards him.
Roxanne, behind him, was waving her arms and pointing frantically at something to his right. He
got to his feet shakily, trying to indicate with his eyes that she should seize the opportunity to find
safe cover.

"Hey! Hey, remember when I dumped you?" she yelled as Titan plucked a street sign out of the
ground and made a show of knocking the end off of it to make a distinctly unfriendly point.
"You're...bringing this up now?" Megamind wheezed, turning to face Titan as he advanced down
the sidewalk.
"I did look back! And you should look back! Right now!" Roxanne yelled.
Megamind stumbled backwards, chancing a glance over his shoulder at the settling pebbles and
rubble. Of course. The invisible car. "Ohh, I get it..." he mumbled, looking back at Titan and
dodging as the street sign was tossed like an over-sized lawn dart. It missed him by bare inches,
embedding ominously into one of his "No You Can't" posters across the street. He turned his duck
into a - very painful - roll and got closer to the car, scrambling around to the opposite side as Titan
reached him.
"You are such a loser! Just give up already," Titan snorted.
"Oh, there's a benefit to losing. You get to learn from your mistakes," Megamind permitted
himself a bit of dialog, groping for the door handle and diving into the car. He swiftly located the
gun and turned it back on from sleep mode, sidling up against the passenger door. He glanced
back at the gun and growled in frustration at the 'warming up' signal.
"Minion, if we live, I will kill you," he grated through his teeth, which turned into a hissing inhale
when a hand burst through the door. He grabbed the handle as the door was lifted aloft and almost
cried from the weight of the gun in his broken left hand. The fingers shivered and the gun slipped
from his fingers even as the invisible field dissipated from the door. He stared down at Titan's
angry face in terror and did the only thing he could think to possibly do.
He clicked down the door lock.
And was promptly flung into the air at a speed that made the wind scream past his ears and ripped
the air out of his lungs.

All Along the Watchtower

There are many here among us who feel that life is but a joke.
"Megamind!" Roxanne shrieked, dropping the pole she had picked up with the intention of hitting
Hal. Hal turned to her at the noise and for the briefest of seconds looked almost...hurt. It was gone
in the time it took to notice it, replaced with a ferocious anger. His eyes lit from within, burning
like coals as he advanced down the sidewalk towards her.
Roxanne sucked in her breath and turned to run, limping on her cut foot and rapidly swelling
ankle. She stumbled towards the fountain, hoping to get to cover. A shadow fell over her and she
fumbled sideways in the nick of time, the car door landing where she had been moments ago,
throwing shattered glass into her right side and cracking the side of the pool with the force of
impact. She screamed, lowering her shaking arms. Had she not held them up at that moment her
face would have suffered a lot worse than the nick on her cheek.
When she looked up she found it was already too late to run.
With Hal mere feet from her, she tripped backwards over the fountain's rim and landed with a
thump to her backside. Minion swam nervously around her as she scrambled backwards,
plastering herself against the no longer operational fountain feature. It struck her that it was ironic
that here she was, cringing against the flight-gifted Metroman's image, when the real hero was
falling to his death.
Hal was radiating energy, not as a visual glow, but as a sense of rapidly growing power that made
the hairs on Roxanne's arms stand on end. Minion swirled around her ankles, brushing the
dangling feelers against her in what she supposed was an attempt to comfort her. As soon as Hal
stepped foot into the fountain the fish dove forward and bit at his clothes, but his teeth scraping
uselessly against flesh too thick to penetrate. Hal brushed him aside with a sneer.
"Say bye bye, Roxy," he hissed, his eyes brightening until they hurt to look at. Roxanne closed
her eyes and gripped the stone, gritting her teeth. There was the distinctive splash and muffled
clunk of something landing in the fountain in front of her, possibly rubble. Possibly Megamind's
dead body. She felt bile rise into her throat as, again, death did not come immediately. Cautiously,
she opened her eyes to look.
Hal touched his head, looking over his shoulder just as there was a flash of light. At her feet was
the de-hydration gun. With the flash of light, she saw Megamind's distinctive feet appear, propped
on the rim of the fountain. She quickly picked up the de-hydration gun and pulled the trigger,
pointing it at Hal's head. As with Metroman, it bounced uselessly and shot across the street,
reducing a patio set to a blue cube.
Hal turned and gave her an incredulous look before turning back to Megamind. Roxanne retreated
behind the fixture, her chest heaving as she spun the dial on the de-hydration gun to something
more suitable; de-ath ray. Minion swam to her, dazed and bumping against her leg as she sank
down to sit, shaking, in the water. By now Hal was leaning over Megamind and, while Roxanne
could not see exactly what he was doing, the muffled cracking noise and Megamind's shrill cry
made her feel ill. She pointed the gun at Hal's back and fired, with similar results. A plant withered
and fell to ash in the planter over her head.
Hal just ignored her, picking Megamind up. Roxanne's eyes blurred, seeing him hang there limply
like a rag doll. She spun the barrel of the gun and used whatever setting it fell on, which was also
useless. Somewhere to her right something exploded.

Hal turned to look at her then, and the gun fell out of her hands. He stared at her with a coldness
that made her shiver clear to her core. With a glance at Megamind he shifted his other hand to the
blue alien's throat and slowly squeezed; just enough to make him panic and claw uselessly at the
arm holding him up, but not enough to simply kill him.
"I want you to see something, Megamind," Hal whispered, looking back to Roxanne with those
terrible eyes. "You took her from me, now I'm going to take her from you."
"Gkt...Gkt..." Megamind scrabbled at the arm, grabbing fistfuls of the costume and pulling on it
until it tore. "R-Run.." He wheezed, kicking at Hal. Blood seeped slowly from the corner of his
mouth.
Then, with a blurry flash of white, Hal's head snapped to the side and he stumbled out of the
fountain. He brought Megamind up just as the white flash moved again, halting its motion. Dust
settled around them as Metroman and Hal squared off, sizing each other up. Hal took several steps
back, circling in a predatory manner.
"What, another copy? Come on, I'm not falling for the same trick twice. I wasn't born last week
you know!" Hal snorted, retaining Megamind, but switching him to his other hand where he could
hold onto his shirt collar. With his right hand he hefted a chunk of re-bar and concrete, flinging it
at Metroman.
Metroman backhanded it out of his way, narrowing his eyes. "Son, you've got a lot to learn about
being a villain. Why don't you just put him down and we'll settle this peacefully."
"It's Tighten, not son," Hal snapped, holding Megamind closer, like a shield. "And I think I'll just
keep him, has-been."
"Have it your way, then." Metroman darted forward, so fast Roxanne only had time to blink. Hal
just barely dodged him, stumbling to the side and swinging Megamind at him as he went. There
was a sickening crunch and Megamind keened in agony when his right leg impacted Metroman's
shoulder.
Metroman backed off quickly, eyes wide. Megamind was hyperventilating, and Hal was laughing
with that eerie half-mad tone. Metroman moved in again, cautious to keep out of Hal's reach with
Megamind and choosing his blows more carefully. He backed off again, shaken by how hard it
was to fight when someone's life really did hang in the balance.
"What's the matter, old man? Can't do it?" Hal taunted, using his laser vision to cut a wide swath
of destruction ending in Metroman's shoulder. Metroman for his part had stood his ground until
then, and jolted to the side in shock when the laser vision actually seared his flesh. He hovered,
ducking behind a car and pressing a hand to the wound, staring at his own blood in amazement.
He had never bled before, not once.
It burned. He moved out of the way just in time for Titan to lift the car one handed and throw it
over his shoulder with a gleeful giggle.
"Help him!" Roxanne yelled from the fountain, stumbling out of the pool. Several brainbots
drifted down behind her, buzzing in concern. "You can do it with your..." She thought better of
saying it aloud, in case Hal caught on. "With your...you know!"
"I can't without hurting him!" Metroman called back, dodging a truck Hal sent skidding towards
him like a motorized bowling ball. He pressed a finger to his temple out of habit, activating his
laser vision and cutting the vehicle in half.

Hal just ignored her, rushing at Metroman with a bellow of unadulterated rage, keeping
Megamind in between them as he lashed out with his opposite arm to punch Metroman in the jaw.
Dazed, Metroman stumbled back before grabbing Hal's left wrist and preventing him from
shaking Megamind around any more. The two wrestled, spinning in a circle as they each tried to
gain the upper hand.
Roxanne, seeing her opportunity, started across the street towards where she knew the gun was. If
Metroman could be hurt by Hal it was only a matter of time before he was too injured by holding
back to help them any more, or, more likely, Megamind died in the clash between them. She
swallowed the roiling fear in her stomach and got as far as an overturned SUV, huddling behind it
to catch her breath. In the middle of the street, exactly where she needed to go, Hal and Metroman
were circling each other like it was a boxing ring. Even without them in the middle of it, the
rubble in the street would have made it nearly impossible for her to cross; the cut on her foot had
worsened with the addition of glass to the sharp chunks of concrete and she could really only
manage a snail's pace.
It was impossible for her to get across the street to the gun. She glanced over her shoulder at the
brainbots, now hovering over the fountain. Minion must have been saying something to them - she
could see his face out of the water - but she couldn't hear anything he was saying. She did
recognize a familiar paint job though.
"Hey! Uh...Here boy!" She patted her thigh. The brainbot turned towards her, and after a slight
hesitation, drifted to her. Roxanne sucked in her breath in relief, it was definitely her friend from
the lair. Emblazoned on its side, slightly obscured by scorch marks, was its name: BB-33.
"Alright, BB...Want to play fetch with me again?" she rubbed it's dome.
The brainbot chirped in response, bumping against her gently. She leaned around the SUV and
watched the super-powered men struggle for a bare second before pointing at the gun. "I need you
to get me that gun over there, can you do that?"
BB-33 bobbed in place and coiled a wire around her wrist lightly before floating across the street,
raising into the air to avoid the titanic struggle. Metroman grunted, taking a fist to the gut and
rolling just out of reach as Hal stomped down with a foot that left a crater in the asphalt. The bot
grabbed the gun in its slender manipulators. Unfortunately, the gun was too heavy for the 'bot to
climb as high as it had to get over the street - apparently it was not as well equipped in the
hovering department - so Roxanne watched as it hovered across slowly, not more than two feet off
the ground, narrowly avoiding being crushed by the two fighters more than once.
Metroman was looking worse for wear and he backed away from Hal, for once legitimately out of
breath, on his hands and knees panting on the ground with sweat and blood dripping down his
face. Roxanne stood, shooing the brainbot away, and holding the charged gun in both hands, and
got as close as she could. Taking aim, she fired and a golden bolt sliced into Hal's shoulder. It
barely left so much as a bump, but it had gone through the costume and a little red spot oozed
underneath.
Hal winced, turning to look at her. With a quick glance at Metroman he left him alone, stalking
Roxanne with Megamind still in hand. Roxanne gulped and tried to pull the trigger on the gun
again, resulting in the gun making a soft error noise. A frantic glance down showed the gun was
charging again. She stumbled away, glancing back to see Hal drop Megamind to pick up a car.
Megamind grabbed at Hal's cape, hauling himself upright without putting weight on his right leg,
and scrabbling at Hal's arm desperately.
"Run! For God's sake, Roxanne, getthehelloutofhere!" Megamind rasped, his voice having a
slight gurgle to it.

Hal ignored him, chucking the car, but the momentary pause was long enough for Roxanne to
drop to the ground the let the car fly overhead without hurting her. Hal shook Megamind off and
reached down to pick up an ice cream cart. Megamind screamed incoherently and swung his fist at
Hal's face, shattering the power armor into a hundred pieces. He laughed weakly, looking at his
shaking hand in horror as Hal shifted the ice cream cart to one hand and grabbed him by the collar
with the other.
Turning, unable to watch, she dragged herself behind a still intact, stopped car. She saw the
passengers inside duck and turned just in time to see an ice cream cart sail through the air, bell
jingling in a merry contrast to its lethality. She jerked sideways, but it caught her shoulder and she
felt something inside shift painfully, jarring her and throwing her to the ground. She lay there
panting in anguish, thankful her other arm had cradled her head instinctively, stars bursting in front
of her eyes.
She heard something crash on the other side of the car, but all she could see were the tires and
Hal's feet turning and walking the other way. A door opened nearby and shaking hands touched
her face.
"You! Look at me!" An old woman commanded, snapping her fingers. Roxanne focused on her.
"Holt, come here, I need you!" The woman tilted her head at the car, a young man in a business
suit coming around the corner in a crab walk. "Can you see where this person is hurt?" the woman
asked.
"Looks like her shoulder's banged up pretty bad, Iris. She isn't bleeding too bad, though," the man
murmured to her under the din of battle and the ringing in Roxanne's ears.
"Alright, sit her up then. What on Earth are you doing out here, girl?" the woman scolded, feeling
for Roxanne's shoulder. Roxanne gasped out loud as fingers prodded lightly at the wound. "Not a
break, but probably a dislocation. Not a terrible one at least."
"I have to...I have to get back out there!" Roxanne brushed them aside, ignoring the rippling
agony rolling down her entire body. She grabbed the gun in her right hand and tripped around the
corner, her breath coming in short gasps and making her a little dizzy. Metroman had at least
stopped Hal from making Megamind a blue splatter on the street, but Megamind still didn't look
good. Right now he was shaking between them, twisting feebly in an attempt to escape.
Hal and Metroman were locked together, pushing against each other. Hal was now trying to pull
Metroman in closer, to force him to crush Megamind in between them. Metroman was trying to
keep Hal away, resulting in a life-threatening stalemate.
Roxanne's knees felt weak and she felt a strong hand on her good shoulder. The businessman was
holding onto her, watching the vicious grappling with wide eyes. Roxanne ignored him, seeing
Megamind look directly at her, then the gun. He grimaced and raised a shaking hand, pointing a
crooked finger at his nose. Roxanne nodded, understanding.
She jerked away from the supporting hand and limped across to the fight, no longer caring how
this affected her health, her life. There were more important things at stake here, and she would be
damned if she let the world die at the hands of this mad man.
She got close enough to get next to Metroman, who grunted and strained against Hal to force him
to stop in his tracks. Without hesitating, she maneuvered the gun up against Megamind's body,
ignoring the pained squeak from him. His ruined hands came down around the barrel, thrusting it
up Hal's nose.

And then she pulled the trigger.

Fix You
Lights will guide you home, and ignite your bones, and I will try, to fix you.
Hal shrieked as a glow was extruded from his nose into the gun, filling it with golden light.
Roxanne let out the breath she hadn't realized she had been holding as Hal shrank back to his
normal size, taking Megamind and her with him. As soon as his body stopped glowing he seemed
to pass out, for which she was thankful.
Megamind, for his part, landed on his stomach with a strangled, gurgling cry and went rigid.
Roxanne rolled him over quickly, pulling her hands back just as suddenly when she felt his ribs
move under her hands and he whimpered in pain, biting his lip and squeezing his eyes shut.
"Oh God..." she whispered, bringing a hand to her lips. Blood oozed out of the corner of
Megamind's mouth, and not from a split lip. The gurgling noise was blood in one of his lungs.
"Oh God," she breathed again. "Someone help!"
Metroman, behind her, stood very still. Voices were around them, and God no one was helping
him, why was no one helping him? Roxanne wondered frantically.
"Move it!" yelled a vaguely familiar voice, and suddenly there were large, strong hands picking
her up and moving her. For a split second her mind jumped back to Hal, and how he had handled
her like a toy. She shrieked and kicked, turning and just barely avoiding breaking a fist on
Metroman's abs. He looked hurt at her reaction, but said nothing, holding his hands up. She
looked back at Megamind's broken body, not even noticing the police that had come out of hiding
to drag Hal's unconscious body away.
The old woman, lead by the businessman, had brushed aside the crowd that was gathering, and
they were crouched over Megamind's form, talking to each other. Another policeman was trying
to keep the crowd back. Megamind had turned very pale and stopped even the twitching of his
jaw.
Roxanne felt a hand touch her good shoulder very softly, tugging her against a spandex-covered
chest. She quivered and burst into tears, burying her face in Metroman's chest and soaking his
already damp suit. It felt like the world had just ended, like she had fallen off the edge and was
lost in a void bereft of the strange, strange man she had fallen in love with.
Another hand gently touched her back, pulling her from Metroman's protective arms. She
squirmed, trying to stay with him, but the hands turned her around and she found the vague
features of the businessman - Holt, his name was Holt - swimming behind her tear filled eyes.
"Miss, miss, listen. He'll be okay, but we need Metroman to make sure that he will be, okay? Do
you understand?" He spoke very firmly.
"He's alive?" she choked, registering his nod. With a sob she wrapped her good arm around this
perfect stranger and clung to him, shaking violently from head to toe. Behind them the old woman
was talking to Metroman, patting his hand as she gave him instructions. They got a smooth board
from somewhere, since the destruction was too much for an ambulance to get through, and
positioned it under Megamind, strapping him into place with a street sign pole, a snapped
telephone wire, whatever they could find. Under Iris' strict instruction Metroman picked up the
bundled Megamind with extreme care and prepared to take flight. With Metroman doing the work
it only took a minute to get done.

"Wait! Take Minion with you!" Roxanne shouted, recalling. She pointed frantically at the
fountain, where the top tier was still intact and able to hold water for at least a quick trip across the
city. "Tell him he had nanobots already!"
Metroman nodded at her, retrieved the alien fish and the makeshift bowl, and set off across the
city.
Holt and Iris bundled her away from the curious bystanders after that, with the help of what police
were left, and a few good Samaritans that were present. They walked a little ways, before Holt
saw her foot and insisted on picking her up. He was short, but surprisingly strong for a
businessman. They continued like that for a little while before Holt handed her back to an officer.
Roxanne had no idea how far they went, but she was traded between arms twice and when they
stopped Iris was adamant they keep her warm and send one of their party for help. Roxanne
curled up against the old woman and shivered, cold sweat dripping down her back.
The rest was a blur to Roxanne, and later she was told that 'acute stress reaction' had settled in. At
some point she may have fallen asleep or blacked out, she wasn't sure which, but everything just
faded for her.
When she woke up she was in a hospital room. Nearby Iris was dozing on the other bed in the
room, and Holt was watching the door with a distinctly suspicious expression.
"H-hey..." she ventured, sitting up painfully and noting that her shoulder was in a sling.
Holt looked up and his severe expression was replaced with a smile. "Oh good, you're awake. My
wife was just about to come in and switch me shifts. You're a popular lady right now, and
probably not in the good way."
Roxanne touched her free hand to her brow and rubbed at her eyes.
"What'd I miss?" Somehow having strangers, at least these particular strangers, in her room didn't
bother her. Not right now anyway.
"You'll probably be glad to know Megamind is alive. Probably still out, they have him hopped up
on a bunch of pain meds right now, but he's alive," Holt drawled, casting a glance at the door and
leaving his post.
Roxanne felt tears in her eyes again but wiped them away with the back of a hand. "Can I go see
him?"
Holt shifted, frowning over his shoulder at the doorway. "I don't know if that's such a good
idea..."
"Hey, looks like you're awake!" exclaimed a voice from the doorway.
Roxanne managed a weak smile. Metroman, sans costume, was standing in the hallway bearing
two vases of flowers.
"Metroman, you've come to rescue me, finally."
"Wayne Scott," he said, placing one of the vases on the cabinet by the window. Holt stepped
aside with a nod, taking up his post again.
"Wayne," Roxanne repeated softly. "Thank you for coming back."
"Thank you for getting my head out of my ass," he returned just as softly.

"Hey, we all get that sometimes," she tried, lamely, to pad the regret she sensed in him.
"Not everyone gets people killed," Metroman - Wayne - swallowed thickly. "Have you been to
see him yet?"
"No, but somehow I expect I'm not going to be allowed to for a while yet." Roxanne looked up at
the beeping machines around her mournfully.
"You know...Just this once...I think I can bend the rules, just for you," Wayne smiled slyly.
"I want no part in this," Holt called from the doorway. Roxanne and Wayne shared a giddy laugh
as they unhooked her from the machines and wheeled her out the door before the nurses could get
to the room.
It made her feel like a teenager taking the car out for a spin in secret, the way they snuck down the
halls. They hid behind corners, strolled casually in corridors, and bolted for elevators like there
was a fire behind them. Roxanne laughed until she had tears in her eyes, just because it felt so
good to be alive and sharing in that experience with a friend.
The laughter slowed, then stopped as he was wheeling her into the hushed ICU. They passed a
few doorways before entering one room in particular. Flowers and gifts were strewn around the
window, outside by the doorway. Roxanne felt a lump in her throat at the sight of it all; the
messages, the get well wishes. The city was praising him. If only this had been the case before he
had to get himself destroyed; if only he'd always been good.
But it was no use thinking of 'what if's, when there was only 'what is'. She stared at his quiet form,
the machinery around him keeping his body stable while it repaired itself.
Minion floated, a little tilted, in a tank set up nearby. He noticed them and perked up, but didn't
say anything, just nodded at them while Metroman - Wayne - wheeled her over to Megamind's
bedside. Wayne quietly excused himself when she reached out and laid her hand over Megamind's
blue, bandaged one.
She wasn't planning on letting go, not for a long time.

End Notes

I would like to thank everyone from the Megamind Community for their beta help,
support, and general awesomeness! Stay Classy fandom.
Song list:
I'm Dying - VAST
Temptation - VAST
The Island (part II) - Pendulum
Watercolour - Pendulum
Hero - Nickelback
Savin' Me - Nickelback
Never Again - Nickelback
All Around the Watchtower - Bear McCreary cover
Fix You - Coldplay

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