Proper Table Manners

Its important to make a good impression at mealtime

too.
There are all kinds of opportunities to impress, such as dates, meeting
the parents, lunch with the boss, not to mention the Holidays, plus
more and more job interviews are being done over a dinner table.
One faux pas and you can kiss that promotion goodbye or never get to
kiss the blind date across from you!
From the beginning of time, the act of eating together has had a
pleasant social significance. The word companion and company comes
from the Latin com-, meaning with or together and the Latin
panis meaning bread or food.
A companion is someone you should eat with!
So that the experience is as pleasant and inoffensive as possible, be
sure to develop acceptable techniques of eating.
You should wipe your spoon before passing it to a neighbor.
Do not blow your nose with the same hand that you use to
hold the meat.
--Erasmus, Dutch humanist and author of the first modern book of
manners in 1526.
Maybe weve gotten more civilized since then, or maybe not!
Nowhere is a lack of training more quickly betrayed than at the table.
Below are the ten most common faux pas in social dining and how you
can avoid them!
1.

Which is my water, bread plate, napkin???

If your remember: liquids on the right, solids on the left,
youll never eat someone elses bread again! Thats your
coffee cup to the right of the plate, and your bread plate on
the left!

Your napkin is always placed somewhere within your dining

territorial borders.
2.

As soon as you are seated, unfold your napkin and place it

on your lap. The napkin remains on your lap (except for use)
until the end of the meal. Thats when the diners are leaving
the table, not just when you finish!
If you need to leave the table temporarily, you may leave the
napkin in your chair as a signal to the waiter that you will be
returning. This is also a consideration for the other diners
who wont have to look at your soiled napkin on the table!
Use your napkin before drinking from a glass or cup.
At the conclusion of the meal, place your napkin partly folded,
never crumpled, at the left of your plate. Even a paper napkin
should never be crushed and tossed onto your plate.

3.

The Place Setting: The first and only utensil was the
dagger, that same threatening symbol of violence that you
carried with your for defense! The prevention of violence was
one of the principal aims of table manners. So there are some
serious restrictions regarding knives at the table. The knife is
never pointed at anyone.
A blade pointed outward is a sign that you wish the person
across from you harm! Richelieu was responsible for the
rounding off of the points on table knife blades in 1669 France
in order to prevent further dinnertime bloodshed.
The traditional place setting has the forks on the left side and
knives (always turned inward facing the plate) and spoons on
the right side. The silver is placed in order of use so that you
can follow the rule begin at the outside and work in
towards the plate!

4.

No Oars! Once silverware is picked up from the table it

NEVER touches the table again. Place it on the outer rim of
the plate between bites, but never rest silver gangplank
fashion, half on the table and half on the plate.

5.

When to Start: In gatherings of six or less people, begin

eating only after everyone is served. For larger groups, such
as banquets, it is customary to start eating after four or five
people have been served, or permission is granted from those
not yet served.

6.

Bread and rolls are broken off into bite-size pieces (why
do you think they call meals, breaking bread!) and butter is
spread on each bite as you eat it. Never use a knife to cut the
bread, nor butter a whole slice at once!
Butter should be taken when passed, and placed onto your
bread plate, never directly onto your bread.

7.

Dishes are passed from left to right. When a waiter serves

you, food will be presented on your left, and the dish will be
removed from your right side when youve finished.

8.

Salt and pepper are always passed together, even if

someone asks you only for the salt. They are considered
married in proper dining circles.

9.

Hold a stemmed glass by the stem! This is to prevent chilled

drinks, such as white wine from becoming warmed by your
hand, but it holds for non-chilled drinks as well.

10.

The finish: When you are finished with each course your
knife (blade turned inward) and fork should be placed beside
each other on the plate diagonally from upper left to lower
right (11 to 5 if you imagine your plate as a clock face). This
is a signal to the waiter that you are finished. And dont push
your plate away or otherwise rearrange your dishes from their
position when you are finished.

There are two styles of eating, Continental and American. In the

Continental style, which is more practical, the knife (for right handed
folks) is kept in the right hand and the fork in the left, with no
switching, unlike the zigzag practice of the American style where the
fork is changed from the left hand to the right after cutting food.
The left hand is usually kept off the table and in your lap during
American style dining, except when its being used to hold the fork
during the cutting of food.
In the Continental style the fork is held in the left hand with the tines
down; the back of the fork up. Food is pushed onto the back of the fork
with your knife. Both knife and fork are held while you chew although
you can rest them on the plate.
The Continental, which most people consider old world, is actually
newer! It was introduced by the British around 1880, but Americans
were trying to instill manners on their frontiersmen. The new dining

methods were rejected as disruptive in the middle of this teaching

process. American society felt it would diminish respect for the strict
rules that were being established to remove the barbarian image.
Now that we know you have favorably impressed everyone with your
exquisite table manners, we hope you get that job, promotion and/or
the girl.
We would like to thank Matt Durack, owner of Cregar's
Catering, for providing us with this information. Cregar's is
the contracted caterer with Meadow Brook Hall.