Professional Documents
Culture Documents
I.rC.
9-
'
3%.
a.
. ,--'.7 t-
I..
'
. 7
'I
FA'
D O N ' T
STOKED
.I.
TRY
"
;': ;+
242
H U M P T Y
.
.
.-
HOW
TO ,PLAY
028
1 s-
.. .'. .
'.
34 -
L.
.,
.'
. -..r
!.
5.
,
.
;'
048
?"
.\;-,:,.
'LEAST LIKELY
1'0
...
. .... '
.,
.*, 6
... . .,f.-.
,
'
-,;
..
'
. .*. .
'. -
.! ' .
, .,.
',\ ,
. .
.--
.- 4 9 ; - .
b!.
SUCCEED
'
a
.:.
. .:. .
-.
HIT?-H'
C
' '
. 2* ;.'..
--<.
I.',
.T1
.
r
..a
. ... .
... , . .
i..
' . E D U C A T I O N
Gu!T&,'.:
'
a
=
.;4
. :&'
ROCK-AND-ROLL
..
IF' MEM0e.Y
SERV
.-
, - . at
*,.
.* -*,:,-:*;&
-
..
.. *a*,
-*
...... $:-
D U M P T Y
. . ._ . .-. .. . . * 294
1:..
wH O O L I G A N S
?A;
H - H I G H
....
THIS'.AT. H O M E
:. !
...
.\$-3
, -
.-'
.
'
-?
:.
,i.*-,*
p' ;- 9
.- . , -;..* +-.
{;
-,:
-.,
*;
*&
9,
.. ,
.-a,?
*."-!,
like a baseboll bat to my chest, but one swung from the inside,
Ckar blue spots lit up the aoiaerr of my vision. It was abnrpt, bbodless,
silent violence, Nothing was visibly b m h nothing had chaqed to the
naked eye, but the pain made my mrld stand still I kept playing; I finished
t fek
the mng. 'The audience didn't know that my heart had done a somersault
just besort the sob. My body bad d e l i d its karmic tetribution; reminding me, onstas of how many times I'd incentionallyserved it up a similar
boP-de-bo~
lhejolt quickly became a dull ache that almost f&good. In any case, I
f&more aliw than I had a morn- besort, because I war more alive. 'The
machine in my heart lnd reminded me ofjust how precious this Mi is, Its
timing was impeccablet with a h l l house in front of me, while I played my
guitarII pt the message loud and clear. I pt it a fkw times that mght. And
I got it every time I m s onstage hr the mt of that touq though I never
knew wben it was comirrg.
A doctor installed an implantablecardiovert~de6brilhtmin my heart
when I was thirty-h. It's a t h m ~ i n c b - b qbattery-powered pnerator
that was k a e d thiough an incision in my armpit. It constardy &om
my heart rate, delivering electirwhoclce whenever my heart beats too
durgeiously fist or slow. Fifteen years of overdrinking and diug abuse
bad swollen that organ to one beat short of exploding. When I was hally
hospitalized, I war told I had six weeks to live. Itk been six years since
thenand this piece of machkry has s a d my Mi more than a few times.
I've enjoyed a convenient side &ct that the doctor did not intend: when
my indulgwces have caused my heart to beat too dangerously sbw, my
defibrillator has popped
keeping death &om my door hr one more
day. It also shocks my heart into submission when it beatr fast enough to
court c d k c amst.
Itk a p d thing Igot it djusted besort the &st V e k Rm,hrer tour. I
did that one sober hr the most part; sober emugh that the excitem- of
playing with a b a d I b e l i e d in to fins who b e l i e d in us m o d me to
oa
myam.Ilndn'tbeenthatinspiredinyeaiaIrandoverthes~e;I~
s.
: ~ ~ h r e l e Q S B d R L l ~ ~ S W l ~ y ~ ~ r ~ t h e S t o n e s ~ M l l l l g
**
. -.
*- m
e
9NO. 2: the best of the~r
coljectlons d ~ u e cowrs:'ihem
s
was a
c k k revohJtlondootihdhasnever beene&hedand lsmproud lo
' be a by-productof
My mom Is an Afrloan Amerloan and my dad Is 'Engllsh b -w It6)
They met In P u l s Inthe s k t h fel In bve. and had me. Thelr b
.
I & r ~ ~ khtercorrtlnentd
l
comrnunlon wanV the norm; and:
"4F
$?
-..
SOON
AFTER
WAS
BORN.
MY
MOTHER
+.
MY DAD TOOK
M E T O L O N D O N AS S O O N
u, I could handle the train ride. I was maybe two or three, but ins&
t i d y I knew how far away it was from Stoke's unending miks of brown
brick row bouses and quaint families because my dad was inco a bit of a
bohemian scene. We*dc n h o n couches and notcome back& days. 'There
were Lava lamps and blacklights, and the electric excitement ofthe open
booths and artists along P d e l b Road. My dad never considered himselfa Beat, but he had a b b e d that kindofI&qk through oemosis. It
was as if he had handpicked the highlights of that type of & a bve of
adveaute, hitting the road with nothing but the clothes on yaw back,
finding heker in apartmas fullofintem&ngpeople. My p a w s taught
me a lot, but I k a r d their greatest lesson early-nothing elec is quite
likI&ontheioad.
I remember the p o d things about +land I was the center of my
g r a n d p a s *attention. I went to school. I was in plays: The TrudueDay
dChristmar; I was the E d in The Litde Drummer Boy I drew all the time.
And once a d I watched Zk Avmgerr and %e %wrdcrbirds. T h i s i o n
in latesixties +land war extremely limited and teflected the poet-World
War 11, Chichillview of the world of my g r a n d p a s ' generuion. 'There
were only t k c h d back tkn, and yide from the tmm haws a week
that any of them played thoae tmm program all three played only the news.
Itb no wonder that my p a w s ' gweration threw themaelvesheadfirst into
the cukuralahili that was afbot.
Once Tony and Ipined O h in Loe Angeltr, k never spoke to his p m
ene again, 'Ihey disappeared from my lifequicklyand I o h k e d tbem
growingu p My mother encoufigtd my fither to say in w c h but it made
n, di&ence; he had n, interest. I didn't see my Englieh datives again
until Guns N' Roaer became d
lknowa Wben we p h e d Wembky Stadium in 199% the Hudson clan came out in fmet backstage befbre the
STOKED
M Y FIRST M E M O R Y O F L O S A N G E L E S I S
the Doors'"Lighc My F S blasting from my parents' turntable, every day
dl day bng. In the late aixties and early smemk LA. wrs the place to be,
especially fbr young Brits involved in the atts or music: there was ampk
c&~kaom~tothertill.etodp;ysyrcpmin~hndandtheder
was mthing but paradise compared to Londonb rain and kg. Besides,
dereaing %had fbr Yankee &s wrs the best way to flip off the syraem
and your upbriqing-nd
my dad was more than happy to do so.
MY
PARENTS' R E C O R D C O L L E C T I O N WAS
flawless. 'Ihey Listened to everythingfrom Beethoven to Led Zeppelin and
MY
BROTHER.
ALBION.
WAS
BORN
IN
next-& neighbor in that building was the original, selfprochimed Black Elvis, who can be booked & parties in Lu,Vegakif
anyoneb interested.
Now that I'm older I can see some of the obvious hues that aae away
at my parents' relatiomhip My fither mver liked bow ckwe my mother
to her mother. It bruised his pride when his mother-in-hw helped ur,h a m
and hewas never h d of her involvementin the funily. His drinking
didn't help t h i n p my dad used to like to drink-a bt. He was a s t e m
typically bad dr&
he was never vioEn2 because my dad is much too
smart and aomplicd to ever express himeelfthmugb brute violence, but
he had a bad temper under theinhence. When he was drunk, he'd act out
by makiq impproprmteaomments at the expense of t h e in h k presence,
Needltu to say, he burned many bridges that way.
other and rocialized in the same circle of friends. When they split up, my
k l e brother wasjusctwo years old, so& obvious reasons they agreed that
he s h o d be in his motherb care, but left me the option of livingwkh &her
one of them ro I chow to live wkh my mothet 0la s u p p e d us u,best as
shecould, travelingconsmntIytow h m her work took her. Cht of necessity, my brother and I wm-e shuffled between my m o d house and my
grandmotherb home. My p n t s ' h w e had always been busy, interesting
and unconventionaLbut it had always been stable. Once their bond was
b r o h though c~~
tramition became the nonn & me.
'Iheseparvionwasveryhadonmy&therad Ididn'tseehim&qute
awhile.Itwashardonallofuy t ~ y b e c a m e r e a l i t y t o m e o n c e I s a w
my mother in the company of another man, That man war David Bowie.
1-~+,kIIldha~lonawnthatdingwas+~
Myp-smvertde?ehotherwithvychingk~peet,kinthe
rnonchs be&e they split up, they annpletely awided each 0th- My mom
was out most +s ad my dad s p t tbwe +ar
in the lcicchtq somber
and ;Lbne,dnnkiq red wine and listeningto the piamcompositions of Erik
Sptie, When mymom was borne, mydadandIwcntoutonImgwrllra
He walked everywhere, in England a d Ins Angeles. In pre-Charles
Mamon L.A.-Wre the Manson clan murdered Sharon Tate and her
friends-we also used to hiochhike erywhere. LA.was innocent b&
that; those murders +&xi
the end of the utopian ideals of the sirties
Flower Power era.
My childhood memories of Tony are cinemuic; allof them &moons
spent looking up at him, waEq by his side. It war on one of t h e walks
that we ended up at Fatbuqer, w h he d me that he and Mom were
separating. I was devaatd; the only stability r d known was done. I didn't
urkquedom, I j u a stared at my hamb-.
When my mom cut me down
to explain the h a t i o n later that night, she pointed out the practical beaelits: I'd haw two houses to liw in.I thought about that &a while, and t
m&senseinawaybutit~ndedlikealie;InoddedwhileshespIrebut
I stopped listening.
My pas'separation was aunicabk yet a d d because they didn't
divorcle until yeair, later. 'Ihey ohen lived wkhin waEq d h n c e of each
I N
WORKING
cbe+with David Bowiewhik hewas reamlingSsahn to Stah;she had
been designing clothes for him since Young Amaiaru. So when he signed
1975.
MY M O T H E R S T A R T E D
I aaepted David on- I got to know him because heb mait, iimny, and
enriched my ex+e
of
intensely creative My experience of bim offhim -age, I xmx to aee him d my mom at the L.A Forum in 1975,
STOKED
and, as I have been so many times sine% the mom- he came out omtage,
incharacter, I
capmued His entire matt m s the essence of p&mance. I saw the funiliar elemems of aman I'd p e n to know exaggerated
to the extreme. He had deed rock d o m to its room: being a r o c k s r
is the i n e m d o n ofwho you ate and who you mnt ao be.
,
,
..
.-
-*
;.:.*
.*
.. .
,*
-c'&onegl~therugto~ym~out~omunderihem;
--.
&nts
;
C
....
;.' - .Bw
t
d
..
a.
.. .
wh
,(
llndmywuybacktomypdhagdn
'\
h e n m y ~ a p t s e p a m t e dIwaaecm-bythewdden
,
c h a w Inride I waa stdl agood kid, buton the outsideI became
a problem child, Exprwuring my d o n a is s t i l l one of my
weakmaa d what I fik then defied womb, so I bllowed my natural
inclinuione-I acted out drastically and became a bit of a disciplinary
problem at acbool.
At home, my parema*prombe of a m-abode existence that muldn't
changr a thing hadnt come to paaa I hardb raw my dad for the first year
. I
or w that they w e apart, a d when I did, it waa incense and ~ i r dAs
memtioned, the divorcehit him hard and watching him adjust- difficuk
fix me; fix a while be couldn't workat all. He lived m e a ~ l ay d h u q out
am- h i artiat friends. When I viaited with him, I m a akmg b r the ride
aa he a d bb friends hung out, drank a lot of red wine, and dkcuaaed a n
and literature, the c-tion
typically turning to Picmy dad'a fiww
ice a r k . Dad a d I would p on adventures, too, either to the library or
the art muaeumI w h e we'd sit togaher and draw.
My mother waa home leu, than e r ; ahe worked aonatacl~trawling
o h to wpponmy brotherad me. We apentabt oftimewith mygradmother O h Sr, who waaalwal)aoursaviqgrace when Mom coulddt make
endsmeet. We also spent timewith my aunt UYI cousins who lived inSouth Ce-1
L.A. 'Iheir h m e waa boisterous, W with the energy of
a bt of H a Our viaita there bough aome regularity to our idea of fimily.
But all things consideredI I had a bt of time on my h d s and I took
advantage of it,
OnceIwaatwelm Ipwupfist.Ihadser, Idrank, Iamoked+ettea,
I did d m p n I stole, I got kicked out of =hook a d on a f
koccaaiona I
would have gone tojail if I hadnetbeen under-.
I waa acting out, malcing
m y l i f e a a i n c e m s e d u ~ E a a I f i C l t ~ dAmitthat
e.
Inaalmyadefined
me redly came into its own in t h i period: the intmaity witb which I pussuemy interests. My primarypaby the time1waa &had ahifbad
from drawing to bicycle motocmwa.
In 1977, BMX racing was the newerrt e x m e s p a to folbw the aurE
TWENTY-INCH-HIGH
HOOLIGANS
ing and skateboarding craze of the hte sixtier. It a M y had a few born
Me stam, such as Stu lhompon and Scott Brdthaupt; a lk magazines,
such as &'cycle M w s s Action and Amakan Ftcutylir, and m- semi
pro and pro competitions were popping up constandy. My gtvldmother
bought me a Webco and I m s hooked. I started winning races and was
h e d in a wuple of the magazines as an up-~ndtomingrider in the t h i ~
teen to burteen age category. I loved ic; I was ready to p pro once I'd
h d e d a sponsorc but wmething was miesing. My f+s
weren't clear
enough to me to vocalize just what BMX didnt
inside me. I'd
know it when I found it a lk yeam hat
After xbool I hung out at bike shop and became part of a team ridingfioiallt~~t~~SpoktsandStufEwhereIbeptoco~aabuachof
the shoulder, then one by on we'd grab a car and ride it up the hill.
Balancinga bike, ewn one with a low center ofgravity, while holding on to
a car driving thirty or fioity milw an hour is thbut tricky on flat
ground; attempting it on a wier of tigk uphill S curves like Laurel
Canyon is wmething else. I'm still not sure how nwe of us were ever run
over, It surprises me more to manember that I did that ride, both up and
down hi4 wihout brakes more o h than not. In my mind, being the
youngest meant that1 had wmethingto prove to my friendsevery timewe
rode: judging by the bob on tbeir &es after wme of my stunts, I succeeded. 'Ihey migk haw been only temugetx but my friends -net ea*
impressed
To tell you the truth, we were a gnarly littk &a* One of them was
Danny McCracken. He was sixteen; a strong, heavy, d a c type, he was
akeady a guy e r y o n instinctively knew not to h c k with. One .;Bk
Danny and I stole a bike wkh bent hkr,ad while he d&erately bunnyhopped it to break the &hand make us all laugh, he &dlover the handlebanr and dashed his wrist wide open. I saw it aoming and watched it as if
in dow-motion as blood started quiiringeverywke,
"Ahhh!" Danny shouted. Ewn in p a 4 Dan* voice was oddly sofiespoken consideringhis size-kind of like Mike Tysoda
"Holy shit!"
"Fuck!"
"Dannyk k k e d up!"
Danny lived just around the corneq so two of us held our hands over
his wrist as bbod lcept squirting out between our lingers as we waked
him home.
We got to h i potlch and rang the bell. H i mom came to the door and
we s h o d her Dannyb wrist. She boked at us un&zed, in diddie
'What thefick do you mnt me to do about it?"she said, ad dammed
the doot
We didn't h o w what to do; by this time Dannyk face was paE, We
didnt even know wbere the nevest hospital was. We w a k d him back
down the meet, bbod still spurtingall over us, and fl+
down the fiicrc
car we saw.
I rtuck my head in the window, "Hey my fried k bleeding to death,
TWENTY-INCH-HIGH HOOLIGANS
can you take him to the hoophk" I said hyrterically. "He's p n a die!''
Luckily the M y driving was a nuaa
She put Danny in the fmnt reu d we folbwed her car on our bikes.
When he got to the e m e p c y mom, Danny didn't have to mit; b k d
was pumping out of his w h t like a victim in a horror movie w they
admitted him immediately, as the mob of people in the waiting room
looked on, piued. ?he doctors rtiched up his wrist but that man't the
end of it: when he war released into the waitiq mom where we were miting h him, he wmehow popped one of his newly sewn sticks, rending a
e a m of bbod akyward that Eft a trail acms the c&g
which k k e d
out and disgusted everyone in raw N e e d h to i s a ~he m s d m i t t e d ;
his wamd round of sutures did the trick
THE O N L Y S T A B L E O N E S I N O U R G A N G
wereJohn and Mike, who we c a M the Combuqa Brothers. They were
d k h these reawnst they were from the Valley where the typical
American wburban & thrnad, t& parents were intact, they had sist a , and a l ofthem lived rogether in a nice quaint house. But they weren't
theonly pair of brothera there werealsoJeffand Chris Gr&; Jeffworkd
at Schwinn and Chris m s his ywnger brother. J&was the most adult of
our crew; be was eigkeen and he bad a p b that he took seriousb. These
two -*t
as functioml as the Cowabungas, becauw Chris tried d e s p a
at+ to be like h l older brother and f;riled misetlbly. Thome two had a hot
sister named Tracey, who had dyed her hair black in response t o the fict
that her e h &mily was naturally bbnd Tracey had this whok little
Goth stylegoing&eGothwas
evenascena
And there was Jonathan Watts, wbo was the b*eat head caw among
us. He was jut h n e ; he would do alrything, regardkss of the bodily
harm or p o a d i n ~ a m ~ that
o n migk befall him. I was only d v e ,
but even w, I knew enough about music and people to find it a bit odd that
Jomthan and his dad were dedicated Jethro Tull farm I mean, they ruorshippad Jethro TuU I*mwrryto ray that Jonathan is no longer with uy he
dkd mgicah of an owrdore afier he'd spent years as both a r q h g akoholic and then a hg-waver b r Akoholics Anonymous. I brt touch with
himwaybPck,butIsawhim?g;rinatanAAmettingthatIwas&edto
attend (we'llget to all of that in jut a little bit) &er I war a r m e d one
night in the late eighties. I muldnt believe it; I mlked into this meeting
and was btening to all of these people speak and, afier a while, realized
that the guy h d i n g the meeting, the one who m r as gung ho about wbriety as Lieutenant Bill W p m , Robtit Duval's character in Apocdype
Now,bad been about rurhg, was none other thanJonathan Watm. Time
c a t a l fibi
~ chaqe; you never know how kindred rwlr
is such a po&l
willed u p o r where they mqZht see each other again,
Back the^ thome guys and I speat many an ewning at Laurel Elemencuy School, making very creative uw of t& playpund. It was a hangout for every Hollywood kid wkh a bike, a r h e b o a d , wme booze to
d&k, or some weed to smoke. The playground had tmm lev& connected
by long concrete ramps; it begged to be a b u d by r h a and b h We
took full a d v a m p o f t by decons~lctingthe playgrwndb picnic tables
to make them intojumps that linked the two levels. I*mnot proud of our
chionie &auction of public propexty, but riding down thome two ramps
and launching owr the h c e on my bike was a thrill that was well worth
it. As delinqueat as it was, it also drew c d v e types, many kids in H o t
who went on to do great thinp hung out there I remember Mike
Bakary, bemr known as &a, hanging out, playing his trumpet andgrafki artism putting up murals all the time. It manetthe right hum,but
everyone there took piide in the scene we c d . Unfioitunately, the studems d teach= of that scbool were Eft paying the bin and cleaning up
the &ennath every moaning.
The H p a l unwisely decided to take m v a i s into h l own ha& by
lying in wait to d r o n t US one night. It didn'tgo over well; me kept taunting& hepttooworkedup dmyfriendsand1gotintoitwithhim.h
got out of h d mquickly that a p d y aM the cope. Nothing scattea
a pack of kids like the sound of a siren, w moet of thosc present escaped.
U&nati?l~
I manotone ofthem. Amther kid d I were the only two
who were cwghr; we were handcuikl to the handrail in the ftont of the
school rigk on the meet, on display for all to aee. We mew like two hogtied animals, going nowhere and none too happy about it. We iefULed to
cooperam we cracked wise, me gave them &he mmes, we did everything
TWENTY-INCH-HIGH
HOOLIGANS
shm of oi&q at them and calling them pigs. ' I k y kept asking and did
their best to scare us, but we &ed to meal our names and add-es,
and sine t d v e - y a o l d s don't carry ID, they we= k e d to let us go.
PUBERTY
KICKED
IN
FOR
ME
AROUND
thirteen, while Iattended Bancmh Junior High in Hollywood. Whatever I was feeling about my family breaking up took a bockreat to the
intense surging of hormones. Sitting through a whole day of school
seemed pointless, so I started to cut. I began smoking pot regululy and
riding my bike intensely I found it hard to control my&; I just wanted
to do whatever I wanted to do at a moment's notice. One night while my
friendsand I were schemingabout how to breakinto Spokesand Stuffthe same b i k store where we hung out-for what reason I can't remember, I noticed a kid spying on us through the window of an apartment
acroes the alky
W h a t are you bokin' at?" I yelled. "Do& bok at me!" Then I threw
a brickthrough the kid's window.
H b parents called the cops, of course, and the duo that aesponded to
the call chased my friends and me all over town for the rest of the night.
We biked for our lives all over Hollywood and West Hollywood; we
turned down one-way streets into on-corn* traffic, we cut through
alleys and through parka. They were as tenacious as Jimmy "Popeye"
h y k , Gene Hackma& character in The Frmdr Come&; every time we
turned a corneq they were them Hvemtually we fled inro the Hollywood
Hills and hid in an out-of-the-way canyon like a pack of Wild West outlaws. And just the way it goes down in a cowboy movie, when we tbought
it was safe to leave the hideout and head back to the ranch, we were
headed off at the pass by the same tm deputies.
I assume it was because I was the smallest that they decided to chase
m e when my &ends and I split up. I rode hard, all over the neighbop
hood, unabk to shake them, u m l I finally sought refup in an undep
ground parking garage, I fiew down a few levels, weaving between parked
cars, hid in a dark comer, and lay on the ground, hoping they wouldn't
catchme.'Ikyhadmndownth~onfiwtandbytherimetheygottomy
TWENTY-INCH-HIGH
HOOLIGANS
leocl I think they wexe over it. 'Ihey vigilurtly searched between the cars
with their flashlights; about hundred feet away &om me they turned back
Ip
t lucky. This battle between my f h L a d the LAPD continued for
the rest of tbe summer a d it ceininly wasn't a constructive use of my
rime, but in my mind, at that point, thatk what I considerad fLn,
I m s p ~ e t t y g 0 0 d ~ ~ m y & t o m y L e l f t v e n b P c k t hbut
~
wben I dipped up my mother a d grandmother were very lingking, I was
home u littk as posaibk by the middk ofjunior high. In the rummer of
1978#I had no idea that my gradmother was moving into a unit in a mom
atmus new annpkx that occupied an entire blockbetween Kings Rwd ad
S a m Monica Boukud, akhough I knew the building d because I'd
been riding my b i b through it $ace it was a constmaion sim My fiieadr
and I would high and race one amther t h q h che halhvap a d down
the h e l l s Drhmming doom in one anotWs &es, jumping onm banb
tm a d lea* creatidy shaped &Imarh on the freshly painced w;rlla
We =e in the mi& of doing so when I came =reaming around a corner
and nearly bowled over my mother a d grurdmother, wbo were car*
armloads of O h Sck bebnginp inm her new apartmeat. I'll never kpt
the look on my p d m o t h e r k h e ; it was somewhe b e e n shock ad
horror. I m k e d myselfad shot a l o o k o ~my
r shoulder, where I sawthe
lzst of my friendst& a hard turn out of sight. I had one leg on thegroud,
one on a pedal, d thinking that I might pt any.
"Saul?"O h Sr. said, in her too-awe- higbpitchedgrandmother voice,
"Is thatprtf
"Yes Gmdma," I said. "Its me.How are you doing? My friends and I
werejust coming by to &it."
%at Bit didn't fly at all with my mom, but O h Sc was soglad to ace
me that O h Jr. kt me get amy with it. In fm, it all w o r l d out so well in
t h e e d that a fiew weeks h e r I moved inm that very apartmem, a d that's
wben my junior vanity exploits in Holywood really began totake off. But
we'llget to all of that in jut a little bit.
I'M
N O T G O I N G TO O V E R A N A L Y Z E WHAT
Tearing up tbc h i b d wt
It's no big deal; I'11reveal my "method; such as they we= the rak
wu, hung on awall near the back door ofthe stcm, near the h a h y that
ran right into the back alleyway. Once I managed to get that back door
open without arouaing suspicion, pulling the raft off the wall wu, easy,
And once the raft was offthe wall and on the floor, hidden from general
view by some dbplay of campinggear or whatever, I just waked for the
right moment to carry it outside and walk it a r o u d the comer to where
my &ends mere waiting for me. I didn't even kap that rak. Once I'd
proved that I'd pulled that dare off I dumped it one block ammy on
wmeone's front lawn.
I'm not proud of it, but all things c o n s i d 4 when I was ten miks from
homewithnomoney a
d mybikptaflat, I'mgladthatitwas easyfor me
to steal an inner tube Ennn Top "R" Us,Otherwise, I might haw been out
there h i t c b g brine hGod only kncnvg what k i d of aituatiom. Still,
like q m who repeatedly tempts he,I must admit that however often
you convince ywnelfthat your actiom are necewtry when you know that
they're not quite righ~they win catch up to you in the end.
In my case, in as much as we're talking about shopldhg, in the e d ,
Ip
t nabbed at Tower Records on Sunset Boulevard, which was my par' was one
ents' fivorite record shop. I remember that day all too clearly- ~t
TWENTY-INCH-HIGH
HOOLIGANS
usually
we had weedy
A L L
O F
T H O S E
P E R M U T A T I O N S
WERE
going to m r k themselves out over the next eigk years of my I&, but
only once I'd found a stable family of my own design.
In the vacuum that my family's dissolution left in its wake, I made
my own world. I'm luckyenough that, despite my a@, during a period of
testing my boundaries, I made one friend who has never been fir from
me, even when wovebeen worlds apart. He is still one of my cbsest confidants, which, after thirty years, says a fuck of a bt.
His name is Marc Canter; his fimily owns the famous L.A. institution Canter's Deli on North Fairfix. 'The Canter family moved from
New Jersey and opened the restaurant in the 19408 and it's been a hub
for show-business types ever since, because of the f$od and the fact that
it's open twenty-hr hours. It's only a half mile &om the Sunset Strip,
and in the sixties it became a haven k r musicians and has remained so
ever since. In the eighties, bands like Guns had many a late-night meal
there. 'The Kibbin Room, which is their bar and live music venue next
door has hosted too many great nights of music to name. The Canters
have been wonderful to me; they've employed me, they've sheltered me,
and I can't thank them enough.
I met Marc at 'Third Street Elementary School but we didn't really
become friends until I almost stole his mini bike in fifth grade.
Our friendship was solidikd &om the start. He and I hung out in
Hancock Park, which was next to the affluent neighborhood where he
lived. We used to go down to the ruins of the Pan Pacific 'Theater, which
is where the Grove shopping center is today. ?he Pan Pacific ws an
TWENTY-INCH-HIGH HOOLIGANS
I.:,
e.
+ipqnM.
di..
i'v&,
.*ew y w r perspeclive-~'l i&hearhg wur w b dm
.
.
. -.
. m&hqF:':
zy..
' hg ~ N n & , Y s a ~ l lrneisnng
ke
a m;
or d w l n g . u t d- e. r. l t
i&rlec~:hg
w-r
..
had. The+l*ne
11jl&tce&a'mpkxiy6utonogl~
r.;
YYI\
!*.
.;.cl;,,
*. -.c
owe r allto Steven Adler-he did it, He b the reasonthat I play guitar,
We met one nigh at the LaurelFdemermry playground when we were
thirteen, As I remember r, he wu, skateboarding miserably After a
particularly hard fill, I rode over on my bike and helped him up and we
were instantly inaepafabE.
Steven had p w n up in the Vahy with his mom, h b stepdad, and h b
two brothers until his mom couldnPttake h b bad behavior anymore and
shipped him offa, livewith hisgnadparemm in Holywood. Helwad there
h the reminder ofjunior high, rrummers included, b&e he wur b u d
back to h b mom to attend high school. Steven b special. be's the kind of
mistit that only agrdmother can bve, but can't live with.
Steven and I met tbe summer b&
eighth grade and hung out until
high school since I had jut m o d k o my grandmotheri new am& in
Hollywood, fmm my momiapartment in Hamock Park. Both of us were
new to our school, BancroftJunior High as well as to the nebborhood.
As bng as I kncw him, Steven mmr spent a full weeks worth of time in
schoolout of anygivenmonth I got by because I did d enough in my art,
mu& and Ehglish c b e s that my grade-poincanwap m s high enough to
paaIgotAsinart,Bnglisb andmusicbecwretboee~theonlysubje!cts
that heres& me. Apart komthoee I didn't cate for much ele, d I cut
c b all the time. Since I had & o h a pad of abtnca mxices b m the
adminismtion officesand f d my mom5 signature when I needed t q in
the eyes of the adminiatiation, I wy there much more o h than I ever
wur. But the only reason I actually graduatedjunior high at all was due to
a teachers*strikeduring my h
lyear. Our regular mchers were rephced
by substituteswho w e a troo e a q h me to bulbhitand charm I don't m n t
to get into it, but on more than one occasion I recall playing my teacher*^
fiorite song ongukar for the e h e class. Emugh said
To be honest, school wynk roo bad: I had a whok circk of friends,
includiq a girlfriend (who we'll get to in jut a little bit) and I partrook
liberallyinevery exercisethat m a b schoolenjoyableto stoners.Our crew
met in theearly morning before homemom to mort l o c k mom-a headH O W TO
PLAY
ROCK-AND-ROLL
GUITAR
shop brand of amyl nitrite, a chemical whose fumes expand your blood
vessels and lower your blood pressun and in the process giw you a brief
euphoric rush. Aker a bkw hits of bcker mom, we'd smoke a bkw cigutttes
and at lunchtime recowlene in the courtyud m amoh apint.. ,We did
what we could to make the school day pleasant.
When I didn't go to school Steven and I s p m the day wandering the
gffver Hollywuod u# wkh our heads in the cbuds talking about music
and hustling money, Wedid some offband panhandlingandoddpbe, libe
moving h r n i u n h r someof the random charactem we'd meet. Hollywood
has always bana weird place that amacts odd hh, but in the late seventies, with the stranp rums cukun had & from the kaiown of the
&ties revohtion m the widespread useof d i u p and h e d twmalmomi,
there were m n e really strange ones hanging around.
Idodtrwnembetbowwemet him, buttheremsoneolderguywhoused
toghe us money for nothing. We'djust hang out and tallcto him; I think
he aked us togo to the sawe a ampk of times. I debit+ t h g h t it m e
wtitd, but he wasn't threatening emugh todoanytbing a couple of chitteenyear-olds couldnit handk. Besides, the extra podoet cash was mwth it.
Steve had noinhibitions whatmewi; so he m a m d toacquire money
on a regular basis in many mp, oneofwhich was from Clark* anebbor
of minein her mid-mnries who l i d down the stmet. One day we sawher
sitting on her p m h when we passed by and Steven fek the inclination to
say hi to her. They staited tallkg and she invited us in; we bung out there
for a whik and then I decided to take but Steven said that he m r p i n g
to stay there a littk whik h e r . It turm out that he had sex with her that
night and got money off her to boot. I haw no idea how he did it, but I do
knowthat hewas wkh herfourorfivetimesmore,andptmoneyeuey
s i q l e &me. It war unbelievable to me; I was really enviour.
But thenaga4 Steven muld alwapget involved in hatiom libe that
and they o h didn't have a happy ending. In this cae, he was in the
Clarissa when her gay mommate walked in on them.
middk of sc+
She threw S t t ~ n o fbfr a n d he laded hard-on first on her bedroom &or,
and that war the end of that.
Seven and I gac by; I rmle an the music and rock magazines that we
needed. 'There weren't momany ocher things that we cared to spend money
oa
r ---ma1
- - to me
as art andw
i but 13
a much G~~~
level
r
H O W
TO
PLAY
ROCK-AND-ROLL
GUITAR