1

00:00:22,030 --> 00:00:25,230

One double room without bath
for the 16th, 17th and 18th.
2
00:00:25,230 --> 00:00:27,430
Yes, and if you'd be so good
as to confirm by letter?
3
00:00:27,430 --> 00:00:29,310
Thank you so much,
goodbye.
4
00:00:29,310 --> 00:00:31,190
Have you made up the bill
for room 12, Basil?
5
00:00:31,190 --> 00:00:32,230
No, I haven't
yet, no.
6
00:00:32,230 --> 00:00:33,470
Well, they're
in a hurry,
7
00:00:33,470 --> 00:00:36,150
Polly says they didn't
get their alarm call.
8
00:00:36,150 --> 00:00:37,550
And Basil, please get
that picture up,
9
00:00:37,550 --> 00:00:38,590
it's been there
for a week.
10
00:00:38,590 --> 00:00:40,230
It's been there
since Monday, Sybil.
11
00:00:40,230 --> 00:00:42,510
Tuesday, Wednesday,
Thursday,
12
00:00:42,510 --> 00:00:44,705
Good morning.
Friday, Sat...
13
00:00:49,790 --> 00:00:51,150
Manuel!
14
00:00:51,150 --> 00:00:54,790
There is too much butter
on those trays.
15
00:00:54,790 --> 00:00:55,790
Que?
16
00:00:55,790 --> 00:00:59,110
There is too much butter
on those trays.
17
00:00:59,110 --> 00:01:00,910
- No, no, no, Senor!
- What?
18
00:01:00,910 --> 00:01:03,470
Not "on those trays."
19
00:01:03,470 --> 00:01:07,510
No Sir, "Uno dos tres."
Uno, dos, tres.
20
00:01:07,510 --> 00:01:10,670
No, no.
Hay mucho burro alli!
21
00:01:10,670 --> 00:01:11,870
Que?
22
00:01:11,870 --> 00:01:13,830
Hay mucho
burro alli!
23
00:01:13,830 --> 00:01:15,550
Ah, mantequilla!
24
00:01:15,550 --> 00:01:16,590
What? Que?
25
00:01:16,590 --> 00:01:20,550
Mantequilla.
Burro is... is hee-haw.
26
00:01:20,550 --> 00:01:22,310
What?
27
00:01:22,310 --> 00:01:24,670
Burro... burro is
hee-haw, hee-haw.
28
00:01:24,670 --> 00:01:26,390
Manuel, por favor.
Uno momento.
29
00:01:26,390 --> 00:01:27,550
Si, si, si.
30
00:01:27,550 --> 00:01:28,550
What's the
matter, Basil?
31
00:01:28,550 --> 00:01:29,550
Nothing, dear,
I'm just dealing with it.
32
00:01:29,550 --> 00:01:31,670
He speak good...
how do you say...?
33
00:01:31,670 --> 00:01:32,670
English!
34
00:01:32,670 --> 00:01:36,110
Mantequilla,
solamente, dos.
35
00:01:36,110 --> 00:01:38,550
Dos?
36
00:01:38,550 --> 00:01:41,030
Well, don't look at me,
you're supposed to be able to speak it.
37
00:01:41,030 --> 00:01:42,430
Two pieces!
38
00:01:42,430 --> 00:01:47,230
Two each!
Arriba, arriba!
39
00:01:47,230 --> 00:01:49,550
I don't know why you
wanted to hire him, Basil.
40
00:01:49,550 --> 00:01:51,470
Because he's cheap
and keen to learn, dear.
41
00:01:51,470 --> 00:01:53,350
And in this day
and age such...
42
00:01:53,350 --> 00:01:55,110
But why did you say you
could speak the language?
43
00:01:55,110 --> 00:01:56,550
I learned
classical Spanish,
44
00:01:56,550 --> 00:01:59,550
not the strange dialect he
seems to have picked up.
45
00:01:59,550 --> 00:02:00,990
It'd be quicker to
train a monkey.
46
00:02:00,990 --> 00:02:03,230
Good morning, Miss Gatsby.
Morning, Miss Tibbs.
47
00:02:03,230 --> 00:02:05,107
Good morning,
good morning.
48
00:02:08,470 --> 00:02:10,470
- Basil!
- Yes, dear?
49
00:02:10,470 --> 00:02:11,550
Are you going to
hang the picture?
50
00:02:11,550 --> 00:02:13,390
- Yes I am, dear.
- When?
51
00:02:13,390 --> 00:02:14,710
When I've-
when I've...
52
00:02:14,710 --> 00:02:16,150
Well, why don't
you do it now?
53
00:02:16,150 --> 00:02:17,550
Well, I'm doing this, dear,
I'm doing the menu.
54
00:02:17,550 --> 00:02:18,790
You've got all morning
to do the menu.
55
00:02:18,790 --> 00:02:21,550
Why don't you hang
the picture now?
56
00:02:21,550 --> 00:02:23,550
- Well?
- Yes, all right,
57
00:02:23,550 --> 00:02:25,550
I don't think you realize
how long it takes to do the menu,
58
00:02:25,550 --> 00:02:26,790
it doesn't matter,
I'll hang the picture now.
59
00:02:26,790 --> 00:02:28,550
If the menus are late for lunch,
it doesn't matter,
60
00:02:28,550 --> 00:02:31,830
the guests can look at the picture
till they are ready, right?
61
00:02:31,830 --> 00:02:33,422
Lower.
62
00:02:34,430 --> 00:02:36,030
Lower.
63
00:02:36,030 --> 00:02:37,550
Up a bit.
64
00:02:37,550 --> 00:02:39,870
- There!
- Thank you, dear.
65
00:02:39,870 --> 00:02:41,790
I don't know where
I'd be without you.
66
00:02:41,790 --> 00:02:44,543
In the land of
the living, probably.
67
00:02:48,030 --> 00:02:49,190
Yes?
68
00:02:49,190 --> 00:02:51,550
Uh, could we have
our bill please?
69
00:02:51,550 --> 00:02:52,710
Well, can you
wait a minute?
70
00:02:52,710 --> 00:02:55,030
Right, I'm afraid we're
a bit late for our train,
71
00:02:55,030 --> 00:02:56,830
we didn't get
our alarm call.
72
00:02:56,830 --> 00:02:59,230
Right.
73
00:02:59,230 --> 00:03:00,550
I was up at 5:00,
you know,
74
00:03:00,550 --> 00:03:02,550
we do have
staff problems,
75
00:03:02,550 --> 00:03:04,150
I'm so sorry,
it's not all done by magic.
76
00:03:04,150 --> 00:03:05,550
Basil, are you
doing the menu?
77
00:03:05,550 --> 00:03:06,630
No, I'm not doing
the menu, dear.
78
00:03:06,630 --> 00:03:09,550
I am doing the bill for these
charming people who are in a hurry.
79
00:03:09,550 --> 00:03:11,510
I'm sorry to cause
all this trouble,
80
00:03:11,510 --> 00:03:13,790
but the reason we're late
is we didn't get our alarm call.
81
00:03:13,790 --> 00:03:15,390
Oh, dear, I am sorry.
82
00:03:15,390 --> 00:03:17,030
Basil, why didn't they
get their alarm call?
83
00:03:17,030 --> 00:03:18,190
Because I forgot.
84
00:03:18,190 --> 00:03:21,750
I am so sorry
I am not perfect!
85
00:03:21,750 --> 00:03:23,070
There you are,
there's the bill.
86
00:03:23,070 --> 00:03:24,070
Perhaps you'd
pay my wife,
87
00:03:24,070 --> 00:03:25,310
I have to put
the picture up...
88
00:03:25,310 --> 00:03:27,510
If there aren't any dustbins
to be cleaned out...
89
00:03:27,510 --> 00:03:29,546
Newspapers!
90
00:03:36,070 --> 00:03:38,186
Goodbye.
See you again!
91
00:03:41,230 --> 00:03:42,550
Don't forget
the picture, Basil.
92
00:03:42,550 --> 00:03:43,710
I won't, dear,
leave it to me.
93
00:03:43,710 --> 00:03:44,830
I'm going out now.
94
00:03:44,830 --> 00:03:47,550
I expect it to up
when I come back.
95
00:03:47,550 --> 00:03:49,830
Drive carefully, dear.
96
00:03:49,830 --> 00:03:51,990
Good morning, Major.
97
00:03:51,990 --> 00:03:53,110
Morning, Fawlty.
98
00:03:53,110 --> 00:03:54,710
I do apologize for the
tardiness of the arrival
99
00:03:54,710 --> 00:03:56,230
of your newspaper
this morning, Major.
100
00:03:56,230 --> 00:03:57,350
I will speak to them again,
101
00:03:57,350 --> 00:03:58,350
see if something
can be done.
102
00:03:58,350 --> 00:03:59,990
Ah, more strikes.
103
00:03:59,990 --> 00:04:01,670
Dustmen, post office...
104
00:04:01,670 --> 00:04:03,070
It makes you want to cry,
doesn't it?
105
00:04:03,070 --> 00:04:04,310
What's happened to
the old idea
106
00:04:04,310 --> 00:04:06,550
of doing something for your
fellow man, of service?
107
00:04:06,550 --> 00:04:08,550
- I mean, today...
- Mr. Fawlty?
108
00:04:08,550 --> 00:04:11,150
Yes, I'm coming!
Wait a moment!
109
00:04:11,150 --> 00:04:12,910
They treat you like dirt,
you know?
110
00:04:12,910 --> 00:04:14,310
Of course it's
pure ignorance,
111
00:04:14,310 --> 00:04:16,550
but with the class of
guests one gets nowadays...
112
00:04:16,550 --> 00:04:17,550
Ah! D'olivera
made a hundred!
113
00:04:17,550 --> 00:04:19,110
Did he?
Did he really?
114
00:04:19,110 --> 00:04:20,870
Good for him,
good old dolly.
115
00:04:20,870 --> 00:04:22,390
Well, well, well...
116
00:04:22,390 --> 00:04:23,550
Thank you, Polly.
117
00:04:23,550 --> 00:04:26,630
We're only staying
till Sunday!
118
00:04:26,630 --> 00:04:28,939
Right, thank you.
119
00:04:53,590 --> 00:04:54,830
Ah, I thought you were
going out, dear.
120
00:04:54,830 --> 00:04:57,230
What's this?
121
00:04:57,230 --> 00:04:59,510
I decided, Sybil,
to advertise.
122
00:04:59,510 --> 00:05:00,710
How much
did it cost?
123
00:05:00,710 --> 00:05:02,590
Oh, I haven't... 15?
124
00:05:02,590 --> 00:05:05,790
- Forty.
- Forty.
125
00:05:05,790 --> 00:05:07,910
I have told you
where we advertise.
126
00:05:07,910 --> 00:05:09,550
Sybil, I know
the hotel business.
127
00:05:09,550 --> 00:05:10,630
No you don't, Basil.
128
00:05:10,630 --> 00:05:12,430
Sybil, we've got to
try and attract
129
00:05:12,430 --> 00:05:13,750
a better class of person.
130
00:05:13,750 --> 00:05:14,750
Why?
131
00:05:14,750 --> 00:05:16,510
We're losing tone.
132
00:05:16,510 --> 00:05:17,510
We're making money.
133
00:05:17,510 --> 00:05:19,630
- Yes, yes.
- Just.
134
00:05:19,630 --> 00:05:21,470
Yes, but now we can
try and build up
135
00:05:21,470 --> 00:05:23,430
a higher class of clientele!
136
00:05:23,430 --> 00:05:25,310
Turn away some
of the riffraff.
137
00:05:25,310 --> 00:05:27,150
So long as they pay
their bills, Basil.
138
00:05:27,150 --> 00:05:29,550
Is that all that matters to you?
Money?
139
00:05:29,550 --> 00:05:31,710
This advertisement
is a waste of \A3-40.
140
00:05:31,710 --> 00:05:34,543
One moment!
One moment, please!
141
00:05:36,150 --> 00:05:37,830
- Well?
- Well?
142
00:05:37,830 --> 00:05:40,030
My dear woman, Sir Richard
and Lady Morris,
143
00:05:40,030 --> 00:05:41,430
arriving this evening.
For two nights.
144
00:05:41,430 --> 00:05:43,550
You see, they saw our
advertisement in country life.
145
00:05:43,550 --> 00:05:44,790
I wish they were
staying a week.
146
00:05:44,790 --> 00:05:46,590
- Well, so do I.
- Might pay for the ad then.
147
00:05:46,590 --> 00:05:48,110
Sybil, look!
148
00:05:48,110 --> 00:05:50,550
If we can attract
this class of customer,
149
00:05:50,550 --> 00:05:52,070
I mean, the sky's
the limit!
150
00:05:52,070 --> 00:05:54,510
Basil, 22 rooms
is the limit!
151
00:05:54,510 --> 00:05:56,910
I mean, have you seen
the people in room six?
152
00:05:56,910 --> 00:05:59,510
They've never even
sat on chairs before.
153
00:05:59,510 --> 00:06:02,707
They are the commonest,
vulgarest, most...
154
00:06:14,510 --> 00:06:16,550
Allo!
155
00:06:16,550 --> 00:06:18,063
Got a room?
156
00:06:19,870 --> 00:06:21,750
I beg your pardon?
157
00:06:21,750 --> 00:06:22,899
Got a room
for tonight, mate?
158
00:06:24,630 --> 00:06:25,750
I shall have
to see, sir...
159
00:06:25,750 --> 00:06:27,710
- A single?
- Yeah.
160
00:06:27,710 --> 00:06:29,746
No, make it a double,
I feel lucky today!
161
00:06:32,550 --> 00:06:34,461
- Hello.
- Good morning.
162
00:06:38,110 --> 00:06:39,270
Only joking.
163
00:06:39,270 --> 00:06:40,390
- No, we haven't.
- What?
164
00:06:40,390 --> 00:06:41,750
Haven't any rooms.
Good day.
165
00:06:41,750 --> 00:06:43,550
Number seven is
free, Basil.
166
00:06:43,550 --> 00:06:45,790
Mr. Tone is in
number seven, dear.
167
00:06:45,790 --> 00:06:48,390
No, he left while you were
putting the picture up, Basil.
168
00:06:48,390 --> 00:06:50,030
You have
luggage, Sir?
169
00:06:50,030 --> 00:06:51,030
Just one case.
170
00:06:51,030 --> 00:06:54,430
In the car...
The white sports.
171
00:06:55,550 --> 00:06:56,990
Fill this in,
would you, Sir?
172
00:06:56,990 --> 00:06:58,503
If you can.
173
00:07:01,550 --> 00:07:04,350
Hope you enjoy
your stay, Mr. Brown.
174
00:07:04,350 --> 00:07:06,390
Uh, Manuel,
would you fetch
175
00:07:06,390 --> 00:07:09,270
this gentleman's case
from the car outside?
176
00:07:09,270 --> 00:07:10,498
Take it to room seven?
177
00:07:12,110 --> 00:07:14,070
- Is not easy for me.
- What?
178
00:07:14,070 --> 00:07:15,830
Is not easy for me...
entender
179
00:07:15,830 --> 00:07:17,550
It's not easy for
you to understand.
180
00:07:17,550 --> 00:07:19,950
Manuel... we're
training him.
181
00:07:19,950 --> 00:07:21,099
He's from Barcelona.
182
00:07:22,750 --> 00:07:23,790
In Spain.
183
00:07:23,790 --> 00:07:25,990
Obtener la valisa...
184
00:07:25,990 --> 00:07:28,550
- Que?
- La valisa en el,
185
00:07:28,550 --> 00:07:32,310
er, auto
bianco sportiv.
186
00:07:32,310 --> 00:07:33,870
Y... a la sala...
187
00:07:33,870 --> 00:07:35,747
Siete... por favor.
188
00:07:38,390 --> 00:07:39,550
Pronto.
189
00:07:39,550 --> 00:07:40,550
Is impossible.
190
00:07:40,550 --> 00:07:41,910
- What?
- Is impossible.
191
00:07:41,910 --> 00:07:43,310
Look, it's
perfectly simple!
192
00:07:43,310 --> 00:07:46,870
Manuel - sirvase buscar mi
equipaje que esta en el
193
00:07:46,870 --> 00:07:50,550
automovil blanco y lo traer
a la sala numero siete.
194
00:07:50,550 --> 00:07:52,550
Senor
habla espanol!
195
00:07:52,550 --> 00:07:54,510
Solo un poco,
lo siento.
196
00:07:54,510 --> 00:07:56,550
Pero he
olvidado mucho.
197
00:07:56,550 --> 00:07:57,630
No, no,
habla muy bien.
198
00:07:57,630 --> 00:07:59,630
Muy muy bien.
Formidable!
199
00:07:59,630 --> 00:08:00,670
Gracias, gracias.
200
00:08:00,670 --> 00:08:01,785
Lo voy a
coger ahora.
201
00:08:06,710 --> 00:08:07,950
Well, if there's
anything else,
202
00:08:07,950 --> 00:08:09,590
I'm sure Manuel will
be able to tell you,
203
00:08:09,590 --> 00:08:11,546
as you seem to get on
so well together.
204
00:08:12,550 --> 00:08:13,539
Key?
205
00:08:36,590 --> 00:08:38,546
Hello, dear, just
doing the picture.
206
00:08:41,190 --> 00:08:42,259
Don't forget
the menu.
207
00:08:44,390 --> 00:08:45,590
I beg your pardon?
208
00:08:45,590 --> 00:08:47,270
Don't forget the menu.
209
00:08:47,270 --> 00:08:48,310
I thought you
said you wanted...
210
00:08:48,310 --> 00:08:49,299
Right!
I'll do the menu.
211
00:08:51,750 --> 00:08:53,550
You could have had
them both done by now
212
00:08:53,550 --> 00:08:54,590
if you hadn't spent
the whole morning
213
00:08:54,590 --> 00:08:56,630
skulking in there
listening to that racket.
214
00:08:56,630 --> 00:08:58,190
Racket?
215
00:08:58,190 --> 00:09:03,548
That's Brahms!
Brahms's Third racket!
216
00:09:07,470 --> 00:09:09,070
The whole morning?
217
00:09:09,070 --> 00:09:10,469
I had two bars.
218
00:09:11,990 --> 00:09:13,270
Ready to order?
219
00:09:13,270 --> 00:09:15,990
Uh, yeah.
What's a gralefrit?
220
00:09:15,990 --> 00:09:17,070
Grapefruit.
221
00:09:17,070 --> 00:09:20,950
And creme pot...
Pot rouge?
222
00:09:20,950 --> 00:09:22,350
Portugaise.
Tomato soup.
223
00:09:22,350 --> 00:09:23,550
I'll have the gralefrit.
224
00:09:23,550 --> 00:09:28,550
Now balm carousel... Lamb?
225
00:09:28,550 --> 00:09:29,550
Casserole.
226
00:09:29,550 --> 00:09:30,710
Sounds good.
Does it come with a smile?
227
00:09:30,710 --> 00:09:32,390
It comes with
sprouts or carrots.
228
00:09:32,390 --> 00:09:33,550
Oh, smile's extra, is it?
229
00:09:33,550 --> 00:09:35,222
You'll get one if you
eat up all your sprouts.
230
00:09:37,550 --> 00:09:38,539
Waiter!
231
00:09:46,310 --> 00:09:47,299
I beg your pardon?
232
00:09:48,470 --> 00:09:49,550
Oh, hello.
233
00:09:49,550 --> 00:09:50,790
Can I have
some wine, please?
234
00:09:50,790 --> 00:09:52,550
The waiter
is busy, Sir,
235
00:09:52,550 --> 00:09:54,750
but I will bring you
the carte des vins
236
00:09:54,750 --> 00:09:56,550
when I have finished
attending to this Gentleman.
237
00:09:56,550 --> 00:09:58,550
Oh, fine.
No hurry.
238
00:09:58,550 --> 00:10:00,550
Oh, good, how nice,
how very thoughtful.
239
00:10:00,550 --> 00:10:02,910
I trust the beer is to
your satisfaction, Sir?
240
00:10:02,910 --> 00:10:05,550
Yes, fine.
241
00:10:05,550 --> 00:10:07,950
Ah, good.
May I wish you bon apetit.
242
00:10:07,950 --> 00:10:08,939
Thank you.
243
00:10:09,830 --> 00:10:11,229
Manuel!
244
00:10:12,510 --> 00:10:13,510
Senor.
245
00:10:13,510 --> 00:10:14,550
Would you fetch
the wine list please?
246
00:10:14,550 --> 00:10:15,539
Si, Senor.
247
00:10:17,430 --> 00:10:19,270
- The wine list.
- Si?
248
00:10:19,270 --> 00:10:21,750
- The wine... vino.
- Senor.
249
00:10:21,750 --> 00:10:24,910
No, no. The list!
250
00:10:24,910 --> 00:10:27,750
There, there, the list!
251
00:10:27,750 --> 00:10:31,504
The list, there!
The red... there!
252
00:10:33,150 --> 00:10:34,185
There!
253
00:10:43,430 --> 00:10:44,990
Have you got a half
bottle of the beaujolais?
254
00:10:44,990 --> 00:10:46,270
Yes.
255
00:10:46,270 --> 00:10:47,910
Oh, fine.
256
00:10:47,910 --> 00:10:49,550
Right! Never mind!
Never mind!
257
00:10:49,550 --> 00:10:51,470
Manuel, another grapefruit
for table 12.
258
00:10:51,470 --> 00:10:52,550
Please... Manuel!
259
00:10:52,550 --> 00:10:55,144
I do beg your pardon.
I'm so sorry.
260
00:11:03,830 --> 00:11:05,350
- Throw it away.
- Que?
261
00:11:05,350 --> 00:11:06,710
Throw... it... away!
262
00:11:06,710 --> 00:11:07,910
Throw... it...
away?
263
00:11:07,910 --> 00:11:09,468
Throw it away!
264
00:11:10,550 --> 00:11:11,699
Now!
265
00:11:15,070 --> 00:11:16,549
Sorry!
266
00:11:18,310 --> 00:11:19,823
Sorry, sorry!
Sorry about that.
267
00:11:24,950 --> 00:11:26,070
Sorry about that.
268
00:11:26,070 --> 00:11:27,830
No, I like a bit
of cabaret.
269
00:11:27,830 --> 00:11:30,590
You left
your sketch.
270
00:11:30,590 --> 00:11:31,910
Oh! Sorry.
271
00:11:31,910 --> 00:11:33,110
It's very good.
Do you sell any?
272
00:11:33,110 --> 00:11:34,543
Enough to keep me
in waitressing.
273
00:11:36,190 --> 00:11:39,510
One half bottle
of beaujolais.
274
00:11:40,510 --> 00:11:41,550
Sybil!
275
00:11:41,550 --> 00:11:42,983
Someone at
reception, dear.
276
00:11:47,990 --> 00:11:48,979
Yes, yes,
well, yes?
277
00:11:49,710 --> 00:11:51,910
Well, I was wondering if
you could offer me
278
00:11:51,910 --> 00:11:53,070
accommodation for
a few nights?
279
00:11:53,070 --> 00:11:54,070
Well, have
you booked?
280
00:11:54,070 --> 00:11:55,110
- I'm sorry?
- Have you booked?
281
00:11:55,110 --> 00:11:57,670
- No.
- Oh, dear!
282
00:11:57,670 --> 00:11:58,710
Why, are you full?
283
00:11:58,710 --> 00:12:01,430
Oh, we're not full,
284
00:12:01,430 --> 00:12:04,790
we're not full.
Of course we're not full!
285
00:12:04,790 --> 00:12:07,224
- I'd like, ah...
- One moment, please.
286
00:12:09,070 --> 00:12:10,190
- Yes?
- A single room with a...
287
00:12:10,190 --> 00:12:12,190
Could I have your name?
288
00:12:12,190 --> 00:12:13,430
- Melbury.
- One second, please.
289
00:12:13,430 --> 00:12:15,070
Hello?
290
00:12:15,070 --> 00:12:17,070
Ah, yes, Mr. O'reilly,
well, it's perfectly simple.
291
00:12:17,070 --> 00:12:19,230
When I asked you
to build me a wall,
292
00:12:19,230 --> 00:12:22,190
I was hoping that instead of just dumping
the bricks in a pile,
293
00:12:22,190 --> 00:12:24,710
you might have found time
to cement them together,
294
00:12:24,710 --> 00:12:26,070
you know, one on top
of the other,
295
00:12:26,070 --> 00:12:27,830
in the traditional fashion.
296
00:12:27,830 --> 00:12:29,070
Could you fill it in, please?
297
00:12:29,070 --> 00:12:31,950
Oh, splendid!
298
00:12:31,950 --> 00:12:35,030
Ah, yes, but when,
Mr. O'reilly?
299
00:12:35,030 --> 00:12:37,710
There, there!
300
00:12:37,710 --> 00:12:40,070
Yes, yes, yes,
but when?
301
00:12:40,070 --> 00:12:43,267
Yes, yes, ah,
the flu, yes.
302
00:12:44,270 --> 00:12:45,790
Both names, please.
303
00:12:45,790 --> 00:12:47,950
Yes, I should have
guessed, Mr. O'reilly,
304
00:12:47,950 --> 00:12:49,590
that and the potato
famine I suppose.
305
00:12:49,590 --> 00:12:51,150
I beg your pardon?
306
00:12:51,150 --> 00:12:53,550
Would you put both
your names, please?
307
00:12:53,550 --> 00:12:54,870
Well, will you
give me a date?
308
00:12:54,870 --> 00:12:56,070
Yeah, I only use one.
309
00:12:56,070 --> 00:12:57,710
You don't have
a first name?
310
00:12:57,710 --> 00:13:00,304
No, I am Lord Melbury,
so I simply sign "Melbury."
311
00:13:04,910 --> 00:13:06,070
Go away.
312
00:13:06,070 --> 00:13:08,870
I'm so sorry to have kept
you waiting, your Lordship.
313
00:13:08,870 --> 00:13:11,310
I do apologize,
please forgive me.
314
00:13:11,310 --> 00:13:14,750
Is there something,
anything, I can do for you?
315
00:13:14,750 --> 00:13:15,750
Anything at all?
316
00:13:15,750 --> 00:13:17,230
Well, I have
filled this in...
317
00:13:17,230 --> 00:13:18,230
Oh, please don't
bother with that.
318
00:13:18,230 --> 00:13:21,070
- Now, a room?
- A special room, a single?
319
00:13:21,070 --> 00:13:22,070
A double?
A suite?
320
00:13:22,070 --> 00:13:23,110
Well, we don't
have any suites,
321
00:13:23,110 --> 00:13:24,110
but we do have some
beautiful doubles...
322
00:13:24,110 --> 00:13:25,270
No, no, just a single.
323
00:13:25,270 --> 00:13:26,950
Just a single.
Absolutely!
324
00:13:26,950 --> 00:13:28,750
How very wise if I may
say so, your honor.
325
00:13:28,750 --> 00:13:29,870
With a bath?
326
00:13:29,870 --> 00:13:33,499
Naturally, naturally!
Naturellement!
327
00:13:35,590 --> 00:13:38,470
I shall be staying for
one or two nights...
328
00:13:38,470 --> 00:13:40,062
Manuel!
329
00:13:45,070 --> 00:13:47,030
It's rather grey
today, isn't it?
330
00:13:47,030 --> 00:13:48,070
Oh, yes,
it is, rather.
331
00:13:48,070 --> 00:13:49,790
Of course usually down here
it's quite beautiful,
332
00:13:49,790 --> 00:13:52,702
but today is a real
old, uh, rotter.
333
00:13:54,710 --> 00:13:56,143
Manuel!
334
00:13:57,390 --> 00:13:58,790
Still, it's good
for the wheat.
335
00:13:58,790 --> 00:14:00,070
Yes, I suppose so.
336
00:14:00,070 --> 00:14:02,870
I hear it's coming along
wonderfully at the moment!
337
00:14:02,870 --> 00:14:04,510
Thank God!
I love the wheat.
338
00:14:04,510 --> 00:14:06,070
There's no sight like
339
00:14:06,070 --> 00:14:08,550
a field of wheat waving
in the... waving
340
00:14:08,550 --> 00:14:10,063
in... Manuel!
341
00:14:13,190 --> 00:14:14,910
Well, how are you?
342
00:14:14,910 --> 00:14:16,070
I mean if it's not
a personal question.
343
00:14:16,070 --> 00:14:17,070
Well, it is
a personal...
344
00:14:17,070 --> 00:14:18,390
Let me take your
cases for you.
345
00:14:18,390 --> 00:14:19,470
Oh, thank you
very much.
346
00:14:19,470 --> 00:14:20,630
- They're just outside.
- Splendid.
347
00:14:20,630 --> 00:14:21,665
Thank you so much.
I won't be one moment.
348
00:14:30,070 --> 00:14:33,510
Ah, Lord Melbury.
May I introduce my wife?
349
00:14:33,510 --> 00:14:34,950
Yes, we have met.
350
00:14:34,950 --> 00:14:36,430
My wife, may I
introduce his Lordship.
351
00:14:36,430 --> 00:14:38,070
Thank you, Basil,
we've sorted it out.
352
00:14:38,070 --> 00:14:40,070
Splendid, splendid.
353
00:14:40,070 --> 00:14:42,590
I wonder, could I deposit this
case with you?
354
00:14:42,590 --> 00:14:44,110
It's just a few valuables?
355
00:14:44,110 --> 00:14:45,190
Valuables, of course.
356
00:14:45,190 --> 00:14:46,590
Please let me take it now.
357
00:14:46,590 --> 00:14:47,830
I'll put it in the safe
straightaway.
358
00:14:47,830 --> 00:14:49,990
Sybil, would you put this
in the safe, please?
359
00:14:49,990 --> 00:14:51,350
I'm just off to
the kitchen, Basil.
360
00:14:51,350 --> 00:14:52,350
Yes, well, if
you're too busy...
361
00:14:52,350 --> 00:14:53,750
Nice to have met you,
Lord Melbury.
362
00:14:53,750 --> 00:14:55,470
- Hope you enjoy your stay.
- Thank you so much.
363
00:14:55,470 --> 00:14:57,270
I'll do it then,
then I'll do the picture...
364
00:14:57,270 --> 00:14:58,390
I'll put this away in
one moment, your Lord.
365
00:14:58,390 --> 00:15:02,510
Manuel, will you take
these cases to room 21.
366
00:15:02,510 --> 00:15:03,990
Que?
367
00:15:03,990 --> 00:15:07,870
Take...
to room... 21.
368
00:15:07,870 --> 00:15:09,430
No entender.
369
00:15:09,430 --> 00:15:13,070
Prenda las casos en...
Oh, doesn't matter.
370
00:15:13,070 --> 00:15:15,510
I'll do it.
Thank you manuel.
371
00:15:15,510 --> 00:15:18,510
- I take them.
- No, no, go away!
372
00:15:18,510 --> 00:15:20,070
Go and wait!
373
00:15:20,070 --> 00:15:21,230
- Wait?
- Wait.
374
00:15:21,230 --> 00:15:23,830
In there!
Go and wait In there!
375
00:15:23,830 --> 00:15:25,263
Go and be a
waiter in there!
376
00:15:29,790 --> 00:15:31,390
I do apologize,
your Lordship.
377
00:15:31,390 --> 00:15:32,743
I'm afraid he's only
just joined us.
378
00:15:33,990 --> 00:15:37,062
It'd be quicker to train
a monkey, ha ha ha!
379
00:15:47,270 --> 00:15:49,070
Do please follow me...
380
00:15:49,070 --> 00:15:51,470
I mean, if you're ready.
There's no hurry.
381
00:15:51,470 --> 00:15:52,949
Oh, yes, yes, fine.
382
00:15:58,990 --> 00:16:00,790
Excuse me, I'm sorry
to bother you.
383
00:16:00,790 --> 00:16:02,270
Would you mind
moving to that table?
384
00:16:02,270 --> 00:16:03,270
What?
385
00:16:03,270 --> 00:16:05,110
Could I askyou please,
to move to that table over there?
386
00:16:05,110 --> 00:16:06,110
But...
387
00:16:06,110 --> 00:16:07,110
I'm so sorry
to trouble you.
388
00:16:07,110 --> 00:16:08,790
- We're halfway through!
- Thank you so much.
389
00:16:08,790 --> 00:16:10,190
This is Lord Melbury's
table, you see?
390
00:16:10,190 --> 00:16:11,670
- What?
- Lord Melbury.
391
00:16:11,670 --> 00:16:13,910
When he stays with us,
he always sits at this table.
392
00:16:13,910 --> 00:16:14,910
Well, why did
they put us here?
393
00:16:14,910 --> 00:16:16,710
Uh, an oversight
on my wife's part.
394
00:16:16,710 --> 00:16:18,350
I'm so sorry.
He's only just arrived, you see.
395
00:16:18,350 --> 00:16:19,550
Would you mind?
Polly!
396
00:16:19,550 --> 00:16:21,270
Would you help these
people to that table?
397
00:16:21,270 --> 00:16:23,150
Thank you,
thank you so much.
398
00:16:23,150 --> 00:16:24,788
Come on!
Come on!
399
00:16:26,190 --> 00:16:27,179
Thank you.
400
00:16:35,070 --> 00:16:36,230
Ah, Lord Melbury!
401
00:16:36,230 --> 00:16:38,070
Do please come this way,
your Lordship,
402
00:16:38,070 --> 00:16:40,190
I have your table over
here by the window.
403
00:16:40,190 --> 00:16:43,550
As usual...
just here.
404
00:16:43,550 --> 00:16:45,984
- Thank you so much.
- Thank you very much.
405
00:16:49,270 --> 00:16:51,070
Oh, my God!
406
00:16:51,070 --> 00:16:52,190
I think he's
killed him!
407
00:16:52,190 --> 00:16:54,863
Get on with your meals!
Thank you so much.
408
00:17:04,990 --> 00:17:07,830
Lord Melbury, I really
must apologize again...
409
00:17:07,830 --> 00:17:09,710
Please, please,
think nothing of it.
410
00:17:09,710 --> 00:17:11,070
- But it was so...
- No, no, no.
411
00:17:11,070 --> 00:17:12,590
It was the
smallest of accidents.
412
00:17:12,590 --> 00:17:13,830
It could have
occurred anywhere.
413
00:17:13,830 --> 00:17:15,830
- Yes, but...
- I've forgotten all about it.
414
00:17:15,830 --> 00:17:18,550
That's most... You're really...
Ah, your Lordship,
415
00:17:18,550 --> 00:17:21,310
would you allow me
to offer you
416
00:17:21,310 --> 00:17:23,070
dinner here tonight,
as our guest?
417
00:17:23,070 --> 00:17:24,590
That's extremely
kind of you.
418
00:17:24,590 --> 00:17:26,390
Unfortunately, I have
an engagement tonight.
419
00:17:26,390 --> 00:17:27,870
- Oh.
- Oh, actually...
420
00:17:27,870 --> 00:17:29,950
- Yes?
- There is one thing.
421
00:17:29,950 --> 00:17:31,070
Good! Good!
422
00:17:31,070 --> 00:17:34,070
I was wondering...
can you cash me a small check?
423
00:17:34,070 --> 00:17:36,270
I'm playing golf
this afternoon...
424
00:17:36,270 --> 00:17:37,350
Oh, delighted!
425
00:17:37,350 --> 00:17:38,830
And I'd rather not
go into the town.
426
00:17:38,830 --> 00:17:41,070
Absolutely... I mean,
uh, how much?
427
00:17:41,070 --> 00:17:42,150
Uh, if it's not
a rude question?
428
00:17:42,150 --> 00:17:46,350
Could you manage
50... oh! 100?
429
00:17:46,350 --> 00:17:51,630
A hundred?
Oh, absolutely.
430
00:17:51,630 --> 00:17:54,230
Oh, yes, I mean,
will 100 be enough?
431
00:17:54,230 --> 00:17:55,910
I mean 150,
432
00:17:55,910 --> 00:17:57,110
two, 160?
433
00:17:57,110 --> 00:18:00,390
Let's see, that's uh,
dinner tonight, few tips...
434
00:18:00,390 --> 00:18:01,990
Oh, and it's the
weekend, isn't it?
435
00:18:01,990 --> 00:18:03,184
Would 200
be all right?
436
00:18:04,710 --> 00:18:09,070
Please! Yes! Oh, ha, ha!
Oh, tremendous!
437
00:18:09,070 --> 00:18:11,470
Oh, I'm so happy!
438
00:18:11,470 --> 00:18:13,350
I'll send someone to
the town straightaway
439
00:18:13,350 --> 00:18:15,550
and have it for you here
when you get back.
440
00:18:15,550 --> 00:18:16,910
Yes, well,
that would be splendid.
441
00:18:16,910 --> 00:18:18,230
Thank you, thank you,
your Lordship.
442
00:18:18,230 --> 00:18:19,230
Thank you so much.
443
00:18:19,230 --> 00:18:21,950
Oh, not at all,
my privilege.
444
00:18:21,950 --> 00:18:25,499
Breeding...
I mean... oh!
445
00:18:26,750 --> 00:18:28,710
Hello, dear.
446
00:18:28,710 --> 00:18:30,670
- What are you doing?
- I'm kissing you, dear.
447
00:18:30,670 --> 00:18:32,110
Well, don't.
448
00:18:32,110 --> 00:18:35,070
Just thought it might
be nice to...
449
00:18:35,070 --> 00:18:36,350
I heard
about lunch.
450
00:18:36,350 --> 00:18:38,790
What? Oh, that!
Think nothing of it.
451
00:18:38,790 --> 00:18:39,830
What?
452
00:18:39,830 --> 00:18:41,070
It was the smallest
of accidents.
453
00:18:41,070 --> 00:18:42,630
- Could have happened anywhere.
- Anywhere?
454
00:18:42,630 --> 00:18:44,670
First you move that nice family
in the middle of their meal,
455
00:18:44,670 --> 00:18:46,626
and then you attack
Lord Melbury with a chair!
456
00:18:48,070 --> 00:18:49,150
Look, Sybil,
457
00:18:49,150 --> 00:18:50,990
I've had a word with
Lord Melbury about it.
458
00:18:50,990 --> 00:18:52,310
He was quite
charming...
459
00:18:52,310 --> 00:18:54,150
Oh, it's delightful to have
people like that staying here.
460
00:18:54,150 --> 00:18:58,470
Sheer class, golf,
baths, engagements,
461
00:18:58,470 --> 00:19:00,586
a couple of
hundr... h... h... horses.
462
00:19:02,070 --> 00:19:04,030
Well, I've never seen
such tatty cases.
463
00:19:04,030 --> 00:19:05,070
Of course
you haven't.
464
00:19:05,070 --> 00:19:06,390
It's only the
true upper class
465
00:19:06,390 --> 00:19:07,910
that would have
tat like that.
466
00:19:07,910 --> 00:19:09,070
It's the whole point!
467
00:19:09,070 --> 00:19:11,070
Oh, you don't know what
I'm talking about.
468
00:19:11,070 --> 00:19:12,830
No, I don't.
But don't ever move guests
469
00:19:12,830 --> 00:19:13,910
in the middle
of a meal again.
470
00:19:13,910 --> 00:19:15,423
And get that
picture up.
471
00:19:17,270 --> 00:19:18,385
Sour old rat.
472
00:19:21,270 --> 00:19:22,350
Ah! Polly.
473
00:19:22,350 --> 00:19:24,030
Would you do
me a favor?
474
00:19:24,030 --> 00:19:26,350
When you're down in
the town this afternoon,
475
00:19:26,350 --> 00:19:27,942
would you
just pop...
476
00:19:29,070 --> 00:19:30,070
just between
ourselves,
477
00:19:30,070 --> 00:19:31,070
don't mention this
to my wife,
478
00:19:31,070 --> 00:19:32,867
pop into the bank
and just...
479
00:20:40,750 --> 00:20:42,308
Could somebody
answer that, please?
480
00:20:45,790 --> 00:20:47,870
Hello!
481
00:20:47,870 --> 00:20:50,150
Is there nobody
who can answer that?
482
00:20:50,150 --> 00:20:51,139
There must
be someone.
483
00:20:53,070 --> 00:20:54,139
Not you.
484
00:20:56,070 --> 00:20:57,310
I'll never get it up.
485
00:20:57,310 --> 00:20:58,750
I'll cancel my holiday,
do it then.
486
00:20:58,750 --> 00:21:01,662
Hello, Fawlty Towers?
487
00:21:02,670 --> 00:21:03,910
Hello, Fawlty Towers.
488
00:21:03,910 --> 00:21:05,630
Oh, hello, Brenda.
489
00:21:05,630 --> 00:21:08,070
Basil, it's 6:00.
490
00:21:08,070 --> 00:21:10,270
Ah, Polly...
did you cash it?
491
00:21:10,270 --> 00:21:12,150
- Yes, Mr. Fawlty?
- Good, good.
492
00:21:12,150 --> 00:21:13,310
- Could I have a word with you?
- What?
493
00:21:13,310 --> 00:21:15,510
- Could I speak to you for just a minute?
- Not now, polly!
494
00:21:15,510 --> 00:21:16,910
- It's very important.
- Later! Later!
495
00:21:16,910 --> 00:21:18,270
- Basil!
- I'm just going, dear.
496
00:21:18,270 --> 00:21:19,942
Thank you, thank you
so much, Polly.
497
00:21:26,470 --> 00:21:27,630
Ah, good evening, Major.
498
00:21:27,630 --> 00:21:28,630
Evening, Fawlty.
499
00:21:28,630 --> 00:21:30,150
The usual?
500
00:21:30,150 --> 00:21:33,990
Oh, why not?
Indeed, yes.
501
00:21:33,990 --> 00:21:36,110
Why not?
I've just been watching
502
00:21:36,110 --> 00:21:38,590
one of those nature
films on television.
503
00:21:38,590 --> 00:21:39,590
Oh, yes?
504
00:21:39,590 --> 00:21:41,510
Did you know
the female gibbon
505
00:21:41,510 --> 00:21:43,870
gestates for
seven months?
506
00:21:43,870 --> 00:21:45,430
Seven months?
507
00:21:45,430 --> 00:21:47,630
Well I never...
Here you are, Major.
508
00:21:47,630 --> 00:21:50,070
Seven... my word.
509
00:21:50,070 --> 00:21:51,950
Ah, Good Evening,
Mr. Wareing.
510
00:21:51,950 --> 00:21:55,310
A gin and orange, a lemon squash
and a scotch and water, please.
511
00:21:55,310 --> 00:21:57,110
Certainly.
512
00:21:57,110 --> 00:21:59,590
Is there any part
of the room
513
00:21:59,590 --> 00:22:01,070
you'd like us to
keep away from?
514
00:22:01,070 --> 00:22:02,059
What?
515
00:22:03,710 --> 00:22:04,779
We'll be over there, then.
516
00:22:07,070 --> 00:22:08,310
Seven!
Well, well...
517
00:22:08,310 --> 00:22:09,310
Evening, Fawlty.
518
00:22:09,310 --> 00:22:10,670
Ah, Good Evening,
Lord Melbury.
519
00:22:10,670 --> 00:22:12,830
- Anywhere?
- Yes, anywhere, anywhere.
520
00:22:12,830 --> 00:22:16,470
Lord Melbury, may I offer you
a little apertif as our guest?
521
00:22:16,470 --> 00:22:19,070
That's very kind of you.
Dry sherry, if you please.
522
00:22:19,070 --> 00:22:20,549
What else?
523
00:22:22,190 --> 00:22:24,910
Such...
Oh, I don't know what.
524
00:22:24,910 --> 00:22:26,070
Je ne sais quoi?
525
00:22:26,070 --> 00:22:28,470
Exactly! Exactly!
526
00:22:28,470 --> 00:22:29,710
Ah, there you are, Sybil.
527
00:22:29,710 --> 00:22:31,030
Good evening, Major.
528
00:22:31,030 --> 00:22:33,030
Evening,
Mrs. Fawlty.
529
00:22:33,030 --> 00:22:35,190
- There you are, your Lordship.
- Ah, thank you very much.
530
00:22:35,190 --> 00:22:36,470
I see my little
collection of
531
00:22:36,470 --> 00:22:37,910
coins tickles
your interest.
532
00:22:37,910 --> 00:22:40,190
What?
Oh, yes, yes.
533
00:22:40,190 --> 00:22:42,190
All British Empire
of course.
534
00:22:42,190 --> 00:22:44,070
Used to be quite
a hobby of mine.
535
00:22:44,070 --> 00:22:45,230
Little investment too.
536
00:22:45,230 --> 00:22:47,030
Quite.
Talking about, um,
537
00:22:47,030 --> 00:22:49,066
- did you manage to...
- Oh yes.
538
00:22:51,070 --> 00:22:52,947
- There you are, your Lordship.
- Oh, Thank you, yes.
539
00:23:02,590 --> 00:23:04,070
Yes, you know,
these sorts of things,
540
00:23:04,070 --> 00:23:07,190
their value's soared this
last couple of years.
541
00:23:07,190 --> 00:23:08,230
Have they really?
542
00:23:08,230 --> 00:23:09,350
Oh, yes.
You take my advice.
543
00:23:09,350 --> 00:23:10,630
Get them revalued,
544
00:23:10,630 --> 00:23:12,070
and insure them for
the full amount.
545
00:23:12,070 --> 00:23:13,662
Yes, yes, I will.
546
00:23:14,670 --> 00:23:16,710
You can't take any risks
nowadays, I'm afraid.
547
00:23:16,710 --> 00:23:18,070
- No, no, quite.
- Well, I must be off.
548
00:23:18,070 --> 00:23:19,430
Thank you very much,
your Lordship.
549
00:23:19,430 --> 00:23:20,830
Basil!
550
00:23:20,830 --> 00:23:22,390
Yes, yes, I was just talking
to Lord Melbury, dear.
551
00:23:22,390 --> 00:23:26,070
A gin and orange, a lemon squash
and a scotch and water, please!
552
00:23:26,070 --> 00:23:27,590
I do apologize, I was just
talking to Lord...
553
00:23:27,590 --> 00:23:29,270
Lord Melbury:
Fawlty!
554
00:23:29,270 --> 00:23:31,190
I was thinking...
555
00:23:31,190 --> 00:23:34,070
You see, I am having
dinner tonight
556
00:23:34,070 --> 00:23:36,950
with the duke of Buckleigh,
do you know him?
557
00:23:36,950 --> 00:23:39,070
Not personally, no.
558
00:23:39,070 --> 00:23:41,550
He's a great expert,
559
00:23:41,550 --> 00:23:42,710
you know, Sotheby's
and all that.
560
00:23:42,710 --> 00:23:43,710
Is he?
561
00:23:43,710 --> 00:23:46,070
Now if you like,
I could take them with me,
562
00:23:46,070 --> 00:23:47,670
ask him to have
a quick look at them,
563
00:23:47,670 --> 00:23:49,270
and find their
current value.
564
00:23:49,270 --> 00:23:51,590
- Would you really?
- Yes, yes, certainly.
565
00:23:51,590 --> 00:23:53,350
Well, I'll be off
in a few moments.
566
00:23:53,350 --> 00:23:54,510
- Well, that's really so...
- Basil!
567
00:23:54,510 --> 00:23:57,070
I'm talking to Lord Melbury!
568
00:23:57,070 --> 00:24:01,550
A gin and orange, a lemon squash
and a scotch and water, please!
569
00:24:01,550 --> 00:24:03,063
All right!
All right!
570
00:24:07,710 --> 00:24:08,750
Oh, Mr. Fawlty...
571
00:24:08,750 --> 00:24:09,950
Was that Lord Melbury?
Has he gone?
572
00:24:09,950 --> 00:24:11,350
I rang, Mr. Fawlty,
I must speak with you.
573
00:24:11,350 --> 00:24:14,070
- Can't you see I'm busy?
- It's very important.
574
00:24:14,070 --> 00:24:15,070
- Can we talk in there?
- I can't.
575
00:24:15,070 --> 00:24:16,830
- Basil!
- It's very important!
576
00:24:16,830 --> 00:24:20,470
I'm dealing with something
important out here, Sybil.
577
00:24:20,470 --> 00:24:24,830
Yes? Yes, right, well,
yes, yes, what is it?
578
00:24:24,830 --> 00:24:25,830
- It's about Lord Melbury.
- Yes?
579
00:24:25,830 --> 00:24:27,350
He's not
Lord Melbury,
580
00:24:27,350 --> 00:24:28,910
he's a confidence
trickster.
581
00:24:28,910 --> 00:24:30,390
I beg your pardon?
582
00:24:30,390 --> 00:24:31,470
Mr. Brown told me.
583
00:24:31,470 --> 00:24:32,670
Oh!
584
00:24:32,670 --> 00:24:34,070
Mr. Brown's
from the C.I.D.
585
00:24:34,070 --> 00:24:35,630
They've been
watching Melbury
586
00:24:35,630 --> 00:24:37,390
because he's pulling some
big con trick in the town.
587
00:24:37,390 --> 00:24:39,150
They're going to arrest
him when he leaves here,
588
00:24:39,150 --> 00:24:40,550
so as not to cause
you embarrassment.
589
00:24:40,550 --> 00:24:41,750
But he asked me
to tell you...
590
00:24:41,750 --> 00:24:43,070
Oh, how nice of him!
591
00:24:43,070 --> 00:24:44,270
Please, Mr. Fawlty...
592
00:24:44,270 --> 00:24:45,590
Oh, I don't know
what other tales
593
00:24:45,590 --> 00:24:47,470
Mr. Brown of M.I.5 has been
impressing you with.
594
00:24:47,470 --> 00:24:49,590
- He's a con man!
- Oh, yes, of course,
595
00:24:49,590 --> 00:24:50,590
it stands out
a mile, doesn't it?
596
00:24:50,590 --> 00:24:52,070
He's so common.
597
00:24:52,070 --> 00:24:55,187
Unlike that cockney git
whose ulterior motive
598
00:24:57,070 --> 00:24:59,950
poor, innocent,
misguided child that you are.
599
00:24:59,950 --> 00:25:00,990
Basil, what's
going on?
600
00:25:00,990 --> 00:25:02,430
Nothing, my dear,
nothing at all.
601
00:25:02,430 --> 00:25:04,190
- Mrs. Fawlty...
- Yes, Polly?
602
00:25:04,190 --> 00:25:06,070
- I don't know what she's...
- Basil!
603
00:25:06,070 --> 00:25:07,790
Mr. Brown is
from the C.I.D.
604
00:25:07,790 --> 00:25:09,950
He showed me
identification.
605
00:25:09,950 --> 00:25:12,230
They're watching Melbury.
He's a confidence trickster.
606
00:25:12,230 --> 00:25:13,510
I see.
607
00:25:13,510 --> 00:25:15,070
What do you mean,
you see?
608
00:25:15,070 --> 00:25:16,630
Let's have a look
at these valuables.
609
00:25:16,630 --> 00:25:17,630
What are you
doing, Sybil?
610
00:25:17,630 --> 00:25:18,910
Sybil, I forbid you
to open that safe!
611
00:25:18,910 --> 00:25:21,190
Sybil, I forbid you
to take that case out!
612
00:25:21,190 --> 00:25:25,390
Sybil, do not open
that case, I forbid it!
613
00:25:25,390 --> 00:25:26,950
I never thought I would
live to see the day
614
00:25:26,950 --> 00:25:29,630
when a peer
of the realm,
615
00:25:29,630 --> 00:25:31,910
entrusts to us,
a case of valuables...
616
00:25:31,910 --> 00:25:33,059
In trust...
617
00:25:58,070 --> 00:25:59,110
I'll call the police.
618
00:25:59,110 --> 00:26:00,987
They're already here,
Mr. Brown's outside.
619
00:26:03,030 --> 00:26:04,463
Someone at
reception, Basil?
620
00:26:15,070 --> 00:26:18,070
Ah! All right.
621
00:26:18,070 --> 00:26:21,830
Ah... Good evening.
622
00:26:21,830 --> 00:26:23,070
I believe you
were expecting us.
623
00:26:23,070 --> 00:26:24,230
No, I was expecting
somebody else.
624
00:26:24,230 --> 00:26:26,070
Sir Richard
and Lady Morris.
625
00:26:26,070 --> 00:26:27,190
Yes, yes, them as well.
626
00:26:27,190 --> 00:26:28,190
I'm sorry?
627
00:26:28,190 --> 00:26:29,550
- How did you know?
- What?
628
00:26:29,550 --> 00:26:31,190
Oh... You're Sir Richard
and Lady Morris,
629
00:26:31,190 --> 00:26:32,470
I do beg
your pardon.
630
00:26:32,470 --> 00:26:34,028
I was just think...
631
00:26:37,990 --> 00:26:40,430
Would you mind filling
this out, please?
632
00:26:40,430 --> 00:26:42,910
We've given you room...
aha!
633
00:26:42,910 --> 00:26:44,070
Ah, Fawlty!
634
00:26:44,070 --> 00:26:47,070
Mr. Fawlty to you,
Lord Melbury.
635
00:26:47,070 --> 00:26:48,110
I beg your pardon?
636
00:26:48,110 --> 00:26:49,910
Oh, nothing,
please forget all about it.
637
00:26:49,910 --> 00:26:52,910
Here's the check
for \A3-200.
638
00:26:52,910 --> 00:26:53,979
Ah, thank you
so much.
639
00:26:56,190 --> 00:26:58,910
Now, about my priceless
collection of coins?
640
00:26:58,910 --> 00:26:59,910
Oh, yes, ah,
do you still...
641
00:26:59,910 --> 00:27:01,030
Do I still want
you to take them
642
00:27:01,030 --> 00:27:02,750
to be valued by the Duke
of Buckleigh, my Lord?
643
00:27:02,750 --> 00:27:03,750
- Ah, yes.
- No, I don't.
644
00:27:03,750 --> 00:27:04,830
Because we've
just heard
645
00:27:04,830 --> 00:27:06,710
that the duke
of Buckleigh is dead!
646
00:27:06,710 --> 00:27:09,350
Yes, got his head knocked off
by a golf ball.
647
00:27:09,350 --> 00:27:11,070
Tragic! Tragic!
648
00:27:11,070 --> 00:27:13,230
Well, how are you,
Lord Melbury?
649
00:27:13,230 --> 00:27:16,070
'Ow are yer then?
All right, mate?
650
00:27:16,070 --> 00:27:18,061
'Ow's me
old mucker?
651
00:27:19,750 --> 00:27:21,150
Any valuables to deposit,
Sir Richard?
652
00:27:21,150 --> 00:27:22,139
Any bricks?
653
00:27:24,070 --> 00:27:26,630
I do apologize...
You bastard!
654
00:27:28,070 --> 00:27:29,550
We've given
you room 12
655
00:27:29,550 --> 00:27:30,790
with the view
overlooking the park...
656
00:27:30,790 --> 00:27:31,790
I'm sure you'll
like it...
657
00:27:31,790 --> 00:27:32,830
We'll have your
bags brought up...
658
00:27:32,830 --> 00:27:34,430
And may I
introduce your wife?
659
00:27:34,430 --> 00:27:36,068
Hello, Lord Melbury!
660
00:27:37,830 --> 00:27:41,390
- Bastard!
- Basil!
661
00:27:41,390 --> 00:27:42,823
Please think
nothing of it.
662
00:27:49,070 --> 00:27:50,981
Do please excuse me
one moment.
663
00:27:59,910 --> 00:28:01,059
Basil, the morrises
are leaving.
664
00:28:06,550 --> 00:28:10,230
Basil: Where are you going?
Where are you going?
665
00:28:10,230 --> 00:28:11,470
We're leaving!
666
00:28:11,470 --> 00:28:13,350
Oh, don't, please stay,
you'll like it here.
667
00:28:13,350 --> 00:28:15,068
I've never been in such
a place in my life.
668
00:28:22,390 --> 00:28:24,028
You snobs!
669
00:28:25,070 --> 00:28:29,310
You stupid, stuck-up,
toffee-nosed, half-witted...
670
00:28:29,310 --> 00:28:34,509
upper-class
piles of... pus!
671
00:28:41,710 --> 00:28:43,905
- Sorry, Mr. Fawlty.
- Just one, please.
672
00:28:53,150 --> 00:28:54,868
Sorry, Mr. Fawlty.
673
00:29:03,070 --> 00:29:05,140
Well, I'd better put
the picture up.
674
00:29:08,070 --> 00:29:09,901
Oh, thank You, Polly,
for the...
675
00:29:13,790 --> 00:29:15,950
- Well done, Manuel.
- Que?
676
00:29:15,950 --> 00:29:17,303
Oh... Ole.
677
00:29:18,950 --> 00:29:20,070
Sorry about that,
Mr. Fawlty.
678
00:29:20,070 --> 00:29:21,350
Can I buy you
a drink?
679
00:29:21,350 --> 00:29:23,350
No, no, I'd better put
this up, I suppose.
680
00:29:23,350 --> 00:29:24,339
Basil!
681
00:29:25,910 --> 00:29:27,821
A gin and orange,
682
00:29:28,990 --> 00:29:33,150
a lemon squash and a
scotch and water, please!
683
00:29:33,150 --> 00:29:34,139
Right!
684
00:29:35,390 --> 00:29:36,823
Come on.

0
00:00:0,500 --> 00:00:2,00
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