Politically Inexperienced POTUS Chooses

Inexperienced Cabinet Members

WASHINGTON, D.C. - Our new political leader, the one without any political
experience, has recently confirmed several more cabinet members. Among the
cabinet so far is the Education Secretary, Betsy DeVos, who has never worked in
education. Ive never been to a school, she told us in an interview. Im not even
entirely sure what a school is. The Secretary of Housing and Urban Development is
Ben Carson, who has never been poor but presumably has lived in some type of
housing at one point or another. Possibly most important are the picks for the E.P.A.
and Energy sectors, who are well known members of the Preserve the concrete
rainforest foundation.

First we met up with the pick for the Environmental Protection Agency, Scott
Pruitt, in his underground lair. He will surely be protecting the environment well, as a
close ally of the fossil fuel industry and lover of fur coats and kitten slippers.

We asked him about why hes a good pick for the E.P.A secretary as he
perched on his pile of bones. I should tell you about my charitable acts. Sometimes I
just dump oil straight into the ocean, Pruitt said, tending to his dollar bill fire with his
bare, withered talon. Gallons of it. It's fun to watch those seals slip and slide and
scream!

The pick for the Energy secretary is Rick Perry, who literally forgot about the
Energy department as he proposed abolishing it, and who believes climate change is
occurring naturally, which is at least better than believing it is a hoax created by and
for the Chinese, as the president does.

When asked about these comments, Perry became nervous. Oh, haha, I was
just joking, he claimed, stuffing a pile of money from an undetermined origin behind
his back. I love my job. Only a liberal would suggest I was actually serious. Its time
to stop these attacks on religion. He then chuckled awkwardly and climbed back into
his truck, driving away and avoiding further questions.

Of course, putting people in charge of departments they know nothing about

is the wisest path the president could have chosen. Its exactly why churches are run
by atheists, and butchers shops are run by vegans. Its the only proper way to make

America great again.