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This course is copyright 2013 with all rights reserved.

It is illegal to copy,
distribute, or create derivative works from this course in whole or in part
or to contribute to the copying, distribution, or creating of derivative
works of this book. When you purchased this course, you agreed to the
following statement:

2013, All Rights Reserved. You understand that the informa-


tion contained in this course is an opinion, and it should be used
for personal entertainment purposes only. You are responsible
for your own behavior, and none of this book is to be considered
legal or personal advice.

2013, All Rights Reserved First edition by Bobby Rio (TSB Magazine)
and Rob Judge (Date Hotter Girls, LLC) 2013, All Right Reserved
Introduction: When Shes Laughing....................6
Before We Get to the Funny Business................9
Why Setting the Right Expectation
Makes Humor So Easy...........................11
The Theory of Expectations Is Your
Secret to HUMOR............................13
What Your Humor Will Get Her to See In You.....15
Why Putting Her in Her Head is So Impor-
tant to Attractive Humor..........................17
Finally, Remember: Clowns Dont Get Laid!.....20
Audio Note: Introduction................23

Phase 1: Breaking Her State..................................30


A Brief Word On...Unpredictability....34
Becoming Shameless Attracts Women
with Honesty.............................................35
Using Misinterpretation the Right Way....39
Simple Way to Use Accusations to
Get Her Laughing.............................43
A Foolproof Flirting Formula that Instantly
Breaks Her State..........................................45
Part 1 Templates and Examples.........................49
Audio Note: Part 1......................................52

Phase2: EstablishingYoureA Flirt.........................55


When She Says Something Dumb or
Starts Rambling......................................56
UsingMisinterpretationtoSetUpAFlirtyVibe.....58
How to Mess With Her To Get the Upper Hand....63
Statement Formula to Overcome Fric-
tion & Get Her Laughing........................67
Part 2 Templates and Examples....................72
Audio Note: Part 2............................................74

Phase 3: Rapport Through Humor......................79


Cool Vulnerability: The Secret Hack to Hu-
morous Rapport..............................82
The 3-Step Formula to Telling the Per-
fect Funny Story....................87
How to Amplify Her Laughter 10-Fold with
Effortless Details...............................100
Create the Us Vibe, Role Play It, and
Shes Yours................................................111
The Searing-Hot Partners
in Crime Technique.............115
Pop Culture Makes Humorous Rapport
so Easy a Caveman Could Do It..........121
Part 3 Templates and Examples.............124
Audio Note: Part 3........................................125

Phase 4: Take Her Back to the Playground......129
Using Playful Bullying to Turn Up
the Sexual Tension.........................131
Play Games to Mix Playground Hu-
mor with Rapport...............................136

4
Callback Humor Amplifies the Play-
ground Effect...........................141
Dumbing Your Humor Down to
the Playground Level.........143
Part 4 Templates and Examples....................146
Audio Note: Part 4.....................................147

Phase5:SexualizedHumor....................................150
The Perfect Combo: Sexual Statements
Mixed with Humor........................153
Sexual Priming: The Rejection-Proof Way
to Get In Her Pants...........................157
Part 5 Templates and Examples.............162
Audio Note: Part 5........................................163

5
introduction:
When shes
laughing...
Humor alone will get you a laugh or two; humor in a
specific sequence will get you LAID as well
as prevent you from spinning your wheels...

T
hey werent lying

Women love a guy who can make them laugh. Prob-


ably thats no secret to you either as most surveys of-
ten rank humor as THE most attractive quality women
look for in a man.

What you may not know, however, is that ANY guy can get wom-
en laughing. And I mean, ANY guy. This isnt to say that every guy
is a comedianor even funny. You dont need jokes or elaborate
punch lines to women laughing their pants off (quite literally).

Before we can even delve into this course, first you MUST un-
derstand that comedyas you probably know itis almost
something entirely different from cultivating the ability to make
women laugh. Heres why:

6
Introduction

Comedy requires set ups, punch lines, and very cre-


ative twists and character development
Making women laugh requires creating tension, push-
ing her emotional buttons, and unpredictability

Becoming even a mediocre comedian can take a lifetime,


whereas becoming good at making women laugh is much,
much easier. So easy that you will be a master of it by the end
of this course!

If you have any lingering doubts or insecuri- Making women laugh


ties about not being funny enough, heres requires creating
where you leave those insecurities behind. tension, pushing her
emotional buttons,
In fact, a lot of the time if you try to use tra- and unpredictability...
ditional jokes or comedy monologues to get
women laughing not only does it NOT work, it
also comes across as supplicating and try-hard!

Thats why even guys who can tell funny jokes often dont
come across attractive (probably you know a guy whos hi-
larious yet women just dont seem to like him). On the oth-
er hand, youve probably seen a guy who can get away with
saying absolute to stupidity to women

...yet women seem to crack up at every word he says. Some-


times women even erupt into laughing fits before that guy even
finishes his sentences. Whats up with that? Why do women
fall for guys like this?

7
Introduction

Simple: these sorts of guys understand how to use tension,


know which humor is appropriate in which situation, under-
stand womens emotional triggers, and add a dash of unpre-
dictability to whatever they say.

If it sounds easy...then good! Get ready to Make Her Horny


with Humor!

8
Introduction

Before We Get to
the Funny Business

T
here is a method to the madness of what some people
think of as being funny. Once you understand how
a humorous/flirty interaction is supposed to look, you
will begin to see them as I do, and the mystery will be-
gin to unravel itself.

There is a code language that women instantly recognize as


flirtation even though youre NOT complimenting her, hitting
on her, or asking her questions about herself.

There are loopholes that exist as well, and Ive identified them,
and I know precisely when to exploit those loopholes. The
techniques that Rob and I have discovered and the templates
we have assembled are going to crack this code that very few
men take advantage of and allow you to capitalize on what
we call the Theory of Expectations to make her horny with
humor.

9
Introduction

Having this understanding will put the odds back in your favor,
and give you the control so that you can consistently spark at-
traction in conversations.

This Horny with Humor course looks at five different stag-


es that will immediately help you stack your deck in your fa-
vor, and crack the code of the humor thats attractive to wom-
en!

10
Introduction

Why Setting the Right Expectation


Makes Humor So Easy

I
f youre anything like me, you can probably think back to a
time

...where youve been around a girl who thinks youre shy


or boring... Or even a dork.

...and then, weirdly, did you find yourself living up to her ex-
pectations?

Dont worry, youre not alone. It happened to me ALL the time!

When I first meet someone I can be sort of quiet. And if I sense


that person has pigeon-holed me as the shy guy, I find it much
harder to break out of my shell and display other aspects of my
personality.

Its like I let their image of me shape how I act. And soon
enough I become the shy guy.

11
Introduction

This is what expectations are all about.

To put this in simpler terms: The initial impression we make


on someone, dictates the rest of our interactions with them.

So if the other persons first impression of you is that youre


quiet or shy youre going to find yourself acting reserved
or inhibited to display your personality...

if their first impression of you is that youre friendly or


nice youre going to find yourself acting out the role of
nice guy.

BUT if their first impression of you is that youre a flirt


youre going to find yourself acting fun and flirtatious.

How this relates to humor will be clear in a moment

12
Introduction

The Theory of Expectations Is


Your Secret to HUMOR

I
f youve accepted that self-fulfilling prophecies are real, if
you can relate to feeling pigeonholed as the shy or nice
guy, then it leaves you with TWO choices:

Choice 1: Let the Theory of Expectations become an


obstacle that keeps you from chicks

Choice 2: Use the Theory of Expectations to your ad-


vantage

I dont know about you but I like to take every advantage I can
get when Im out there talking to girls!

Thats You Need to Immediately Establish Yourself as


a Flirty, Funny Guy Who Can Get Her Laughing Her
Pants OFF!

So heres the thing the longer you wait to begin flirting with/

13
Introduction

joking around with women, the more resistance you are go-
ing to face when/if you do and so the harder it is going to be
to make the transition from friendly conversation to flirta-
tious conversation. In fact, you may never even get a chance
to start flirting because she might have already dismissed
you as another boring chump.

You cant really blame women either they get hit on by so


many guys that they have to make a decision pretty quickly
whether or not they want to keep talking to you

...so if she views you as the boring sort of guy she is going to
respond to you in a boring sort of way and give you NOTHING
to work with, hoping that you get the point and walk away.
(Thus living up to her expectations.)

However

...if you quickly establish yourself as a fun, flirtatious kind of


guy she is going to respond in a fun, flirtatious sort of way
and give you TONS to work with (Again, because you lived
up to her expectations.)

Make it your JOB to quickly get her thinking Oh this is the


type of interaction this is going to be FUN THIS guy GETS
IT. Most guys dont get it. And so they REALLY dont get
it (Get it?). So when you show her that you do things get A
LOT easier.

14
Introduction

What Your Humor Will Get Her


to See In You

U
ltimately it all comes down to displaying to her that
you are the kind of guy who is comfortable and con-
fident joking around with hot girls.

And that you enjoy doing it.

What does a guy like this look like?


This guy is sure of himself
This guy is unaffected by what she says
This guy is self-amused
This guy is slightly childish in an endearing sort of way
This guy is animated
This guy is completely comfortable with who he is

The quicker she sees you as this sort of guy the easier the rest
of the conversation is going to go. And more importantly, the
easier it will be to take a conversation from friendly to laugh-
ing to sexual.

15
Introduction

The Good News


The good news is that it is not nearly as hard as you think to
establish yourself as funny. In fact, it is just a matter of a
few well-timed, well-delivered flirtatious banter lines that will
flip the switch in her mind and have her thinking

Oh Hes THAT kind of guy

Once you plant that thought her in mind the Theory of Ex-
pectation takes over and everything else becomes so much
easier. Its like you begin to swim with the tide instead of
against it.

The Bad News


The only bad news is that if you havent acted like this before,
you need to get yourself comfortable being playful and flirty
with women, even with girls youve just met. Most guys walk
on eggshells around attractive women, and espcially attrac-
tive women, theyve just met.

To make the material in this course work, you HAVE TO get in


the habit of LEADING the interaction and moving things in a
humorous and flirty direction... because when you do, youll
pull off a little attraction secret we like to call putting her in
her head...

16
Introduction

Why Putting Her in Her Head


is So Important to Attractive Humor

H
ave you ever been around someone who just seemed
to dictate the pace of a conversation? Or maybe
youve been in a situation where YOU dictated the
pace, a time when you immediately feel in control
of the conversation.

Acting this way is NOT bossy or rude. But it does get people to
feel as they need to live up YOUR standardsand not vice versa.
Even if you say something the other person doesnt necessarily
find funny, they will probably laugh anyway! Thats the feeling
you need to get women to feel around you. Because that feeling
almost always leads to attraction.

This is what we mean when we say putting her in her head.


If you think about it like sports, imagine a team losing to an ag-
gressive team who is constantly on the offensive. All the losing
team can do is try to scramble and play defense.

17
Introduction

Likewise, with women, you want them trying to keep up with


the conversation. She will feel turned on when youre on the
offensive and shes doing what she can to try and keep up.

To think of this another way, if youve ever felt nervous or anx-


ious around women, you obviously know what it feels like to
be in your head. Whenever a guy cant think of what to
say, tries extra hard to make a woman happy or comfortable,
or fears he might mess it up, that guy is stuck in his head!

Most womenand especially hotter womenhave actually


grown accustomed to this! They expect that most men will be
in their head, trying to keep up with THEIR converesation. If
youve ever put up with a womans bad behavior, its because
that woman was on the offensive.

Moreover, if youve ever felt like a woman was bossing you


around, asking you too many questions, sporadically ignoring
you, or even expecting you pay for her drinks or dinner, you
have felt what its like to be in your head. Just think back to
dates or interactions youve had with women. Probably you
can recall specific instances where you felt this way.

Most guys allow this to happen because its easy and it feels
like the nice thing to do. Indeed, when women have you
stuck in your head, youre less likely to encounter friction or
have arguments.

18
Introduction

A woman will feel very comfortable when shes on the offen-


siveso comfortable, shell probably make you her new guy
friend... but thats ALL youre ever going to be to her: just a
friend. If you want to become more than a friend then you
need to put her in her head.

Okay, so how does this relate to humor and,


more importantly, how do you do it?
Getting her in
her head isnt
So much of humor depends on tension. This always easy-but
is how you break her state, establish your- its worth it.
self as a flirt, get sexual, etc. Well say it again
though: you really need to have courage here.
Most guys lack the balls to create moments
of tension and friction. Not only do you need
the courage to create these moments, but actually must get
yourself to ENJOY them.

Rest assured that nothing in this course advocates that you


act like an asshole or behave in an antagonistic way. The only
tense behaviors that we advise you to adopt are those
necessary for attraction. Getting her in her head isnt always
easybut its worth it.

19
Introduction

Finally, Remember:
Clowns Dont Get Laid!

W
omen MAY love to laugh, but they DONT want
a clown or even an entertainer. Even the fun-
niest standup comedy routines can fail mis-
erably on a date... and sometimes EVEN IF a
woman is cracking-up laughing, shes uncon-
sciously losing respect and attraction for the same man whos
making her laugh!

(Sucks, doesnt it?)

Therefore, its crucial that you always remember the golden rule
of attractive humor:

The subtext is more important than


the joke.

20
Introduction

That means the subtext of the jokeor what the joke im-
plies is more important than how funny it is. Take, as an ex-
ample, two jokes:

Joke A: Whats the difference between a Cadillac and


a dead baby? I dont have a Cadillac in my garage.

Joke B: I was going to wear a v-neck shirt out, but I


decided not to because I dont want you staring at my
cleavage all night.

Regardless if you find these jokes funny or not, there are two
very different subtexts in each joke. The subtext of joke A is
that you find dead babies funny. The subtext of joke B is that
you understand how men and women interact. In one joke,
you show your apathy and insensitiveness, whereas in the
other joke you demonstrate that you understand gender rela-
tions and social subtleties.

Most guys find dead baby jokes funny because its cool to
be apathetic and insensitive around other guysthats the
essence of being tough. Women dont find such qualities
endearing, however.

Most women find insensitive men creepy and weird. (Hence


why if you tell a woman a dead baby joke, itll usually make her
think youre disgusting.)

21
Introduction

Keep subtext in mind whenever youre flirting with women.


Use this chapter (as well as some common sense) and youll
quickly get sense of attractive subtexts. Subtext is THE most
important aspect of humorits what women mean when
they say they love a man who can make them laugh. Theyre
really saying they love a man who can make them laugh using
the appropriate subtexts.

Its what separates the unattractive clown from the attractive


funny guy. When it comes to subtext, learn it. Practice it. Use
it. As the golden rule states, the subtext is actually MORE im-
portant than how funny you are. In fact, the other golden
rule of sexy humor states:

The bar for social humorthe type of humor you


use when interacting with womenis set very low. So
dont try too hard to be funnyits not complicated.

Making women laugh takes absolutely no talent. Its simply


a matter of understanding subtext, applying a formula, and
getting the delivery right...all of which well be covering over
the course of the next 5 phases, both in this book and on the
audios!

22
Module 2

introduction
Introduction: The Why of Humor
Why we created this program

Because most people get humor completely


wrong
Maybe youre not naturally funny
Maybe you are but cant think quick enough when youre
with a girl
Maybe your humor doesnt translate well
Certain types of humor work best in different phases of
an interaction

23
Introduction

Specific sequence of shifting your humor that


makes her horny
Humor alone will get you a laugh or two
Humor in a speficic sequence will get you laid
Knowing this sequence also prevents you from spinning
your wheels.

What does this guy look like? How should your


delivery be?
This guy is sure of himself
This guy is unaffected by what she says
This guy is self-amused
This guy is slightly childish in an endearing sort of way
This guy is animated
This guy is completely comfortable with who he is

The Greased Slide of getting her panties off


Humor greases the slide
Humor keeps her logical mind shut down
Laughing and fun are aphrodisiacs
It creates an environment where a seduction can take
place
Laughing provides chemical reactions that help a seduc-
tion along: It oxygenates the brain, it helps the flow of
oxygen to various parts of the body, and circulation (so
does Viagra)
It releases feel good chemicals like dopamine, and en-

24
Introduction

dorphins
Most importantly Humor serves very specific functions
in various phases of a seduction. This is where most guys
blow it. They stick with humor that is only conducive to
one phase and serves only one purpose

Humor should be constantly shifting to serve mul-


tiple purposes; some of the purposes will discuss
are...
Getting her to pay attention to you
Establish yourself as a flirt
Create comfort and rapport with her
Loosen her up for the kiss
Introduce sexuality into the interaction

Humor allows you to display attractive traits


and create an attractive atmosphere
It signals social intelligence, confidence, and pre-selec-
tion
It puts her in an emotional state (much more able to in-
fluence someone)
It builds trust and bonds, and gets her feeling like shes
known you
It allows for physical contact in an innocent way

25
Introduction

Introductions: Important Concepts Bobby and


Rob Will Be Covering
Fun vs. Funny: Why most guys worry about being fun-
ny when girls really prefer a fun guy over a comedian.

Taking her back to the playground: This is a phrase we


use to discuss that elusive space where she feels like
shes back on the playground with her crush

The Giant Spotlight: Your goal is get the conversation fo-


cused on the two of you. Most guys focus on something
or someone else. Humor works best when the humor
stems from the back and forth play between you and her

Shifting styles of humor: Youve got to understand that


what gets her laughing at one point will not bring you
closer to sex later on. Sarcasm is a great example of this.
While it can signal social intelligence later on it actu-
ally works against you

Social lubrication: The primary reason for humor is social lu-


brication. Its to grease up the slide so she continues to move
forward towards sex without self doubt, or objections

The theory of expectations


The first 5 minutes set up the rest of the interaction

26
Introduction

Whether its the first 5 minutes of meeting her, the


date, being back at your place you need to establish
flirtatious humor quickly.
The initial impression we make on someone dictates
the rest of our interactions with them.

Cool Vulnerability
A specific type of humor were going to talk about that
creates a bond with her.

Introduction: The 5 Phase


Panty Dropping Method
Phase 1: Pattern Interrupt
Phase 2: Establish Yourself as a Flirt
Phase 3: Rapport through Humor
Phase 4: Taking Her Back to the Playground
Phase 5: Sexualized Humor

Why use this method?


This will keep you on track and moving forward
Prevents you from turning into a dancing monkey or
court jester
It properly lubricates her
Making a sexual joke might be funny, but if done out of
sequence it can creep her out
Being sarcastic might make her laugh.. but if done be-
fore going for the kiss it might kill the mood.

27
Introduction

Designed to progress towards sex


Moving towards sex is about balancing sexual tension
and rapport
Keeps you on track and prevents floundering
Gives you an intention behind everything youre doing
Is designed to achieve very specific goals in each phase
Is designed to overcome barriers and obstacles and ob-
jections before they come up
For instance, when you ask her to hang out her first ob-
jection might be to think I dont really know this guy...
but if youve brought her through the bonding phase
youre much less likely to get that objection..

The Common Mistakes


For years my humor worked against me instead of for
me
Most teachers teach this wrong. They suggest using a
one size fits all approach to humor. But humor must
change through various phases of a seduction. As we
go through the program youll understand
The humor guys use doesnt translate well to girls... or
theyre just not as funny as they think they are
They come off as try hard
They go into dancing monkey mode and become her
entertainer
Their jokes feel forced
They get stuck in one gear the entire night

28
Introduction

They use one style of humor the entire night


Teasing her is great in the beginning. But if you do it all
night it begins to halt the seduction
They use sexual humor before shes ready for it
They are too self deprecating
Cool vulnerability is good. Displaying negative traits
about yourself for a laugh is NOT
They get addicted to her approval
A lot of times you might be enjoying the approval and
response youre getting so much you begin to fear ru-
ining it by making a move or expressing a sexual intent.
Guys create too much rapport; they then cant make
a move. If you create too much rapport it can become
awkward to try to make a sexual move
She may begin to feel too comfortable around you and
the sexual tension diminishes
Their timing is off and breaks her seduction trance with
ill timed joke
One of the reason sarcasm can hurt a seduction is that
one remark that goes over her head or stings a little
too much can backfire and kill your chances.
Having to explain a joke kills the mood; lowers status

29
phase 1:
Breaking Her
State
Used within the first few seconds of meeting a
girl; the first few minutes of a date; in a
first text message you send her....

I
think we can all agree that women put up sort of a Bitch
Shield when they first begin talking to guy they are uncer-
tain about.

These women dont want to give off too much interest and
encourage him to keep talking, so often they will appear bitchy,
bored, tired, or uptight. It is your job to use bantering to break
through this shield.

I mean, its probably no surprise to you that women love a guy


whos fun and laid back. If a guy seems like he brings positive
emotions or can add something to her night, a woman will want
such a guy to stay around.

Moreover, large groups of girls are less likely to cock-block be-


cause theyll enjoy the guys company as well. That means that

30
Phase 1

your attitude HAS GOT to be...

Im Going to Make Her Smile No


Matter How Hard Shes Frowning
Before you even DELIVER a line or try one of the tactics in this
phase, its important to be high energy and animated. Often
the best way to approach this phase is by getting YOURSELF
laughing and feeling good BEFORE YOU DO ANYTHING!

If youre getting ready to approach a girl in a bar or nightclub,


you should not think too much or hesitate...

Once you do approach or begin an interaction, dont wait to


drop some humorous lines into the interaction! Most guys wait
until they have created rapport to begin teasing a woman or
bantering with her. But the trick is to begin bantering with a
woman as quickly as possible.

Ideally you want to get at least three or four banter lines in


before you move on to more normal conversation. That way,
you can be pretty sure her state has been broken and shes in-
terested in having a fun, flirty interaction with you.

As a quick starter, Ive listed a few simple banter lines below.


When delivering these lines, try to get them in sometime dur-

31
Phase 1

ing the first two minutes of talking to her.

While timing and relevance are important to the delivery of


these lines, I chose these banter lines because they are the
easiest to naturally weave into a conversation. The best way
to deliver the lines is as if you suddenly realized something
about her after 30 seconds or so when talking to her or the
group shes with:
You and I arent gonna get along
You guys arent tourists are you?
Dont say anything, youre cute. Youll mess it all up
Youre cool. You can help me pick up chicks.
You usually hang out at the library dont you?
Oh, so youre one of THOSE
You dont have to be nervous, its cute.
I hate you.
Ok, note to self: dont date her

Remember, the only purpose of these lines is to set the tone


of the interaction. Timing and relevance will play a big role in
the above lines. Youre ptobably not going to get a lot from
her to work with, so use these little banter lines to loosen her
up and break her state.

Also, dont dwell on the banter line. If she tries to pry or wants
you to explain more just let it roll off, give her a sly smile,
and change the subject.

32
Phase 1

Finally, you can always pull a woman or group of women into


your party by using a seemingly situational line. For example:

(While laughing) Hey guys, get this. My friend just said


_____ (insert funny situation or comment, some Ive
used are My friend just said women find handle-bar
mustaches sexy or My friend just said itd be a good
idea to wear sweatpants to a job interview.)

33
Phase 1

A Brief Word On...


Unpredictability

A
ll humor comes from the unexpected. In fact, all the
humor formulas and templates in this course have
some element of the unexpected. If a girl can pre-
dict how a joke will end, she probably wont laugh.

Unfunny people are usually boring, predicable people. There-


fore, always remember much of humor simply comes from do-
ing or saying the unexpected.

Example: If someone asked what you wanted to drink


when ordering at McDonalds and you said, Ill go with an
aged Bordeaux. That usually would get a laugh because
the person asking would have expected you to answer
with a soft drink.

34
Phase 1

Becoming Shameless Attracts


Women with Honesty

I
once asked an attractive woman I was dating, whod heard
every pickup line in the book, if there was such a thing as a
good pickup line. She said yes, but only if a guy is funny and
ironic about it. That way, it seems as if hes acknowledging
the awkwardness of it and, by doing so, makes it funny and
not awkward.

Its kind of like when someone says, Im going to tell you some-
thing but you cant get mad or I dont mean to sound racist,
but and then they say something that normally would have
been really offensiveyet its somehow less offensive because
they acknowledged it!

We like to call sort of humor radical honesty or shameless-


ness. However you want to think of it, get yourself in the habit
of using it because it works WONDERS when attracting women!

An important aspect of shameless humor is getting a little nerve

35
Phase 1

because it takes some nerve to call things out.

Thats because being shameless is the exact opposite of act-


ing shameful, which is how most guys communicate their de-
sire for women. Most men sheepishly admit theyre attracted
to women, or they pretend they arent attracted at all.

And since most guys act this way, it sets up a GREAT opportu-
nity for humor. Not only is acting shameless unexpected/un-
predictable, but it also injects A LOT of healthy tension into the
interaction, which is what will get women laughing uncontrol-
lablyeven if what youre saying isnt objectively very funny.

The first step to using shameless humor is to stop pretend-


ing to be embarrassed that you like girls. Stop hiding itand
start flaunting it! For example, if a woman you find attractive
ever asks you, Are you hitting on me? Tell her the truth: Of
course I am! Even if she says something like, Youre just try-
ing to get in my pants... Try responding with radical honesty,
Of course I am!

Dont be one of these guys who has a hard time admitting


to other peopleand even admitting to himselfthat he de-
sires women.

This mindset applies to other aspects of attractive humor, as


well. For example, say a girl tells you its girls night out
which actually happened to me the other day. I was out with

36
Phase 1

my friend and the girl said something like, Its girls night, I
cant talk to you!

I responded, Does this mean you dont shave your legs?

The girl and her friend were like, What? What are you talking
about?

It was kind of a personal question to ask a set of girls that Id


just met, but sure enough, after saying that, I was able to es-
calate the conversation, saying, If you were about to have
sex with a guy and you havent shaved your legs, what do you
do? Do you have sex anyway? Do you care that youre hairy?

We had this big sexual conversation because I had the nerve


to ask a simple question like, Does girls night out mean you
dont shave your legs?

Growing up, our parents rejected shamelessness. When a little


kid says something that everybody is thinking, parents usual-
ly respond, Ooh. Dont say that here. Shamelessness is just
saying the unsaid. Its like a five-year-old kid is standing in front
of her, noticed something, and just said it.

You also want to do things like connect the dots. For instance,
if she leaves something out, fill it in for her. Maybe shes telling
a story about a guy that she met off Match.com, and it didnt
work out. You can say, Yeah. So the sex got boring? or, No

37
Phase 1

sexual attraction? No sexual chemistry? Youre connecting


the dots of what she left out of the conversation. Thats being
pretty shameless.

It may take some time, a little practice, and whole lot of hones-
ty, but if you can get yourself feeling comfortable about your
desire for women, you will keep them laughing while escalat-
ing the conversation toward sex.

One final point before we get into a few quick examples: feel-
ing comfortable about your desire for women DOES NOT mean
youre chasing them and kissing their ass. Absolutely not! Be-
ing honest with your desire doesnt mean constantly telling a
woman how beautiful she is, or how much you like her.

Please dont misinterpret the shameless mindset as an excuse


to act needy. Acting needy is NOT humorous and its certain
NOT attractive. If youre confused how to communicate your
desire in a humorous way without coming off needy, try lines
like this:
So insert random pickup here. I thought you were cute
and wanted to come over and flirt with you, shameless-
ly.

Hey, as much as Id like to revert to the 3rd grade play-


book of ignoring girls, I had to come over and meet you.

38
Phase 1

Using Misinterpretation
the Right Way

I
magine a woman showing up to a first date with a guy shes
met only once, very briefly, and whom she hardly remem-
bers. Imagine her walking into a colorful lounge and scaning
the room...

A man notices her, smiles, and waves. As shes making her way
over to him, she thinks, Oh God, I hope this guy isnt boring. I
really dont want to sit through an hour of bad conversation...

Outwardly though, she beams a friendly smile and sits down at


the table, across from her date.

Sorry Im late, she says, preparing to enter into the boring


small talk she so hates. Did the waitress already come?

The man smirks a little, waits a moment to respond, and says, Im


not sure, but that would explain why shes smiling so much...

39
Phase 1

At first the comment confuses the her. She was expecting


small talk and...

...did he just say...?

She looks up at him, not sure if she heard him correctly. He


flashes her a self-assured smirk. Then she blurts out laughing.

While the comment was a bit edgy, the man sitting across from
the woman is someone VERY comfortable
around women. Hes a man who understands
how to attractively misinterpret something ... misinterpret her or
accuse her of some-
a woman says so that he can playfully get a thing-even in a joking
woman in a flirty/sexual mood without being way-she will immedi-
creepy or too obvious. ately feel a need to
respond

This techniquesimilar to teasingis accom-


plished by misinterpreting something a wom-
an says or accusing her of something in a comical
way.

This puts a woman in her head because she has to scram-


ble to clarify or defend herself. If you misinterpret her or
accuse her of somethingeven in a joking wayshe will im-
mediately feel a need to respond.

This creates tension.

40
Phase 1

Now, again, this technique should be used sparingly and with


caution. If a woman doesnt realize youre joking, this can eas-
ily create too much tension and become combative (thus ruin-
ing the interaction).

Until you get comfortable thinking of your feet, you may find it
easier to use a formula to misinterpret things about a woman.
I like using templates because if Im in a jam or shes not giving
me much to work with, I can just use a template answer.

One of my favorite playful misinterpretations also involves an-


other comedy concept youll read about in this book: accusa-
tion. Heres the formula:

Girls who... + Thing Shes Doing/Wearing/Etc.


+ ...are total... + Playful Accusation

Here are some an examples of misinterpretations and accusa-


tions that are edgy and work to stoke a womans attraction:

She says: Do you have a minute?


You say: Do I look like a minute man?

41
Phase 1

She says: What do you think of this hat?


You say: Girls who wear hats like that are total trouble-
makers.

In both examples, the tension comes from misinterpreting that


shes sexual and wild. Most of the time, women think youre
the one who has a dirty mind. By reversing that stereotype,
you put her in a position where she has to defend herself and
clarify what she meant (putting her in her head!).

Speaking of which, lets take a closer look at why accusations


work so well in the next section...

42
Phase 1

Simple Way to Use Accusations


to Get Her Laughing

P
layfully accusing a girl of something is great for so-
cial humor.

While it may not be objectively funny, accusation cre-


ates SO MUCH tension in such a funny, flirtatious way
that we just had to give it its own section in this book.

Whenever accused of something, most girls first response will


be to deny it, which as we mentioned in the last section, will put
them in their head.

For example, you may say to a girl, Wow, youre EVIL! to which
shell usually retort, No Im not! Why do you think that?

Thats the perfect setup for SO MUCH social humor. For ex-
ample you could say
Yeah right! You are so evil. Ill bet your head twists around
like the Exorcist!

43
Phase 1

Keep a silent, deadpan face, causing her to keep asking,


What? Why do you think that? Tell me!

Regardless what you do or say after accusing her, itll amplify


her laughter because shell feel tense. And shell want to re-
lease that tension through laughter at your joke. This is the
essence of attractive humor!

The reason we introduced the concept of accusation in the last


section on misinterpretation because the two together make
a killer tag-team! Personally, my FAVORITE time to make an ac-
cusation is right after intentionally misinterpreting something
a woman said. This way, I can use my misinterpretation to
justify the accusation.

It doesnt even really matter if your misinterpretation or accu-


sation makes logical sense. Its more important to let your
imagination run wild and have fun. As long as you do it in a
playful, non-creepy way, shes going to enjoy it. Just be sure
she sees youre NOT seriously trying to accuse her of some-
thing.

You know youre doing it right if the girl plays along even if
she acts offended or indignant. She might say, What?! I didnt
say that! Why would you think that? but if shes saying it with
enthusiasm or a little smirk, shes enjoying herself.

(And thats the essence of flirting!)

44
Phase 1

A Foolproof Flirting Formula that


Instantly Breaks Her State

W
e hate canned pickup lines. Most are just not
funny. And the few that are typically DO NOT
contain the type of humor thats going to get
you laid because the subtext is all wrong. Pick-
up lines ooze with the subtext Im trying to
impress you (at best) or Im sleazy (at worst).

Yet there ARE times when having a few lines up your sleeve can
be extremely effective. One of those moments is when trying to
break a womans state. Breaking her state so she flirts with you
is CRUCIAL. Unfortunately, most guys strike out because theyre
either NOT using humor at all, or using the wrong type of humor,
to do that.

You want to make a womans decision to flirt with you as easy


on her as possible. It usually only takes between 30 seconds to
2 minutes to do this. But to do it, you HAVE TO be a guy shes in-
terested in learning more about.

45
Phase 1

Reaching that hook point moment can be a simple as saying


a single sentence or phrase. Often it will take a little more, but
rest assured: as long as you have a womans attention, you can
keep throwing out phrases and lines until something hooks.

A very consistent way to create this vibe is by


using baitconversation topics you know
will get an emotional response. These con- bait:conversation
versations are based on leading her into an topics you know will
get an emotional
invisible thread. A thread is anything she response
says that you can use as a talking point. For
example, if she says, I drive a red Honda Ac-
cord, there are plenty of threads in that sen-
tence:
The carwhy does she drive a Honda Accord? Does
she like it?
The colorwhy did she pick red? Does it describe her
personality?
She driveswhen did she learn to drive? Is she a good
driver?

You too can probably think up dozens of threads without


breaking a sweat. Thus, the issue isnt finding threadsits
about finding humorous threads that get her flirting with you.
Finding a flirty thread about a Honda can be challenging, es-
pcially when youre on the spot. Theres only so much you can
say about driving a red Honda Accord thats attractive or that
will spark a vibe.

46
Phase 1

And so thats where the idea of invisible threads comes into


play. You dont have to make breaking her state any more dif-
ficult than it already is. Trying to improvise attractive threads
on the spot is nerve-wrackingso why do it if you dont have
to?

You can set yourself up for a flirty exchange just by steering


the conversation toward an invisible thread. Heres one way
to do it... once you begin talking to a woman, get yourself in
the habit of teasing her by saying:
Oh wow, you have a bit of an accentdont you?

Then follow up your tease by saying something like, Hmm...


lemme guess where your accent is from...

Even if a woman tells you, I dont have an accent, just chuck-


le as if she were lying and say, Stop. You totally do. Lemme
guess where its from. This is a surefire way to lead to the
invisible thread, which is to set yourself up to make a humor-
ously wrong guess about her accent.

So, if I were talking to a Caucasian girl who obviously grew up


in New York, Id say, Sounds like youre from the jungles of
Vietnam. If I was talking to an Asian girl, Id say, Youre to-
tally German, arent you? I know this might sound weird, but
this sort of shtick is all you need to spark a vibe. Women are
almost always going to laugh and tease you back. If you dont
like the accent example, come up with an invisible thread you

47
Phase 1

like better. Point is: figure out a surefire to always spark a flirty
vibe, right from the start. Heres a flow chart that spells out
the formula to create a flirty vibe...

48
Part 1: Breaking Her State

Unpr t y
ed ictabili >You have an accent! wheres it
from? Lemme guess. Guam
>___________ is EVIL!
>Whats new in _____(Ironic Place)__?

Tips 1. Set her up to think youre going to


guess something (e.g., Accent); twist
expectations by guessing something
off-the-wall
2. Saying anything is evil usually gets
a laugh

Radic
al Truth >Im going to flirt shamelessly
with you for the next 32 seconds...
>Im taking you on a speed date!
>...you cant really blame me...

Tips 1. Hitting on women creates tension,


which often leads to laughter... use
that to your advantage!!!
2. Dont hide sexual intent; highlight it!
3. Girls often find the idea of going on
a speed date funny if said at a bar or
party, try it!

49
Part 1: Breaking Her State

sn
Misin i o
terpretat >If by ____ you mean ____, then yes!
>You are such a (badass/flirt/diva/nerd/
dork)!
>Ill bet you are (if she says, Im
wet...)

Tips 1. The easiest way to inject humor into a


weird situation is to reverse it with
the If by... template
2. You can misinterpret her behavior
however you want...and the less logi-
cal you are, the funnier it usually is...

Pop C
ulture >Wait, Im calling a Zack Morris
timeout.
>I kissed a girland liked it!
>Bling, bling!

Tips 1. Making a funny pop culture reference


can instantly get her laughing as
well as create rapport
2. be on the lookout for funny lines
and sayings from TV and movies!
3. Be on the lookout for female-
friendly references... popular ro-
mantic comedies (e.g. Wedding
Crashers) are great for this!

50
Part 1: Breaking Her State

Incon
gruence >Its guys night out!
Youre going to be my new body-
guard!
>Stop staring at my man-cleavage!

Tips 1. Playing on gender humor is great


because it shows that you get the
difference between men and women
so much you can make it into a joke
2. To do this on-the-fly is easy! Just
reverse a stereotype

S pec l s
i
ific deta >A girl drinking an Appletini WOULD
say something like that.
>Wear that dress you know I love!
>What are you doing at 8:03 tonite?

Tips 1. For whatever reason, specifics are


funny. get in the habit of noticing de-
tails and commenting on them!
2. Specifics are great to combine with
other humor aspects (e.g., Radical
truth: Lets go on a speed date, fall
hopelessly in love, have 2.5 children,
find our dream house with the white
picket fence...all in the next 37 sec-
onds! ready? Lets go!

51
Module 2

Part 1: Breaking Her State


Introduction: Why you need to interrupt her
pattern...
Goal of this phase is to capture her attention and snap
her out of her boredom trance
Laughter and smiling feels good scientifically
Your trying to get her to pay attention long enough to
create an inkling of attraction
Shes got ADD. We all do. It takes an emotion to get us
to focus in on something (anger, surprise, laughing-
think about if youre flipping channels)
Youre trying to distract her from the hundreds of other
thoughts flowing through her mind
You can also use this to quickly move her from one emo-
tion to the next Robs piss her off with a tap on her

52
Phase 1

back then make her laugh

Characteristics: What are the elements of this


first phase
Youre going for a smile not a belly laugh
Have you ever been in a fight with someone, and they
say something just funny enough to make you lose your
concentration and smirk...?
It has to be basic and cant require her to have to think
too much
It also must be self explanatory and cant need a long
set up to a punchline
It needs to be blatant. Subtly wont work here
Remember, youve only got half her attention at this
point so its got to be obvious

PRO TIP: Well talk more specifically about going into a char-
acter in a later phase.. but something that will help is to put
yourself into a comedic character Barney from How I Met
Your Mother is an example

How you know it worked


She laughs
Giggles
Smacks you playfully
Playfully calls you a name

53
Phase 1

Examples: What are some examples


of phase one humor
Unpredictability: Bordoux example
Radical Truth: Im trying to pick you up
Playful Misinterpretations: Im wet.. I bet you are
Pop Culture tie in: Mr. Belevedere

Mistakes to Avoid: What are some


mistakes to avoid in phase 1
Using jokes that depend too much on her knowing you
without setting up the expectation of humor
If youre hanging out with a girl whos known you for
awhile this isnt a problem.. but if youre just meeting
her she might not get it if it depends on your charac-
ter
Jokes that kill the mood
My lesbian slip
Being too sarcastic or coming off as an asshole
The Im above you attitude doesnt work in first few
minutes unless she knows you well.
Not going into humor quick enough
The longer you wait to introduce humor the harder it
gets. This is because of The Theory of Expectations

54
Phase 2:
Establishing
Youre A Flirt
Maintained the first few minutes of the interaction; no
matter if this is your first time meeting her, or youve
hung out before, you should also re-establish yourself
as a flirt early in the conversation...

H
aving a fun vibe is essential because its the ultimate
currency. Its why we go out to bars, clubs or pret-
ty much any place that we can go out to have fun.
Its how we choose our friends and even why people
drink or do drugsbecause they want to have fun and
are craving to be around people that allow us to have fun...

Fun is the Ultimate Currency!

So lets talk about how to make your conversations with women


fun and funny. You have to begin the roller coaster ride of a con-
versation that creates an emotional response and leads to physi-
cal attractionthe kind that gets her to come home and follow
you to your bedroom... so use the ideas, tactics, and techniques
in this phase to establish that YOU ARE A FLIRT!

55
Phase 2

When She Says Something


Dumb or Starts Rambling...

I
f you learn to what women are saying and you get a feel for
bantering then youll see that women give you all the mate-
rial you can possibly need to get them laughing.

Heres the thing though: once you establish yourself as a flirt


women treat you that way (as I discussed in the introduction).
When she does, shell unconsciously give you material to use.

Here are a few quick lines to quickly get her to see you as a flirt.
The best way to deliver the lines is to exaggerate how little sense
she is making. This is a good time to be animated, and a slightly
childish.
Are you just making shit up as you go along?
Its a good thing youre pretty, because once the looks
go youll be in trouble...
Lets play a game. Its called how long can you hold your
breath.
Youre aware youre still talking right?

56
Phase 2

I dont know what youre on but I am sure they offer


rehab for it...
Bartender, I think you need to cut this girl off!
Now youre starting to scare me...
You are a total blonde fluff ball.

Remember, you dont want to come across mean or insulting


with these lines. Youre just trying to be playful and fun. If
done correctly, she will probably tease you or bust your balls
a little. Thats a GOOD thing. It means she sees you as a flirt!

57
Phase 2

Using Misinterpretation
to Set Up A Flirty Vibe

I
n the last section, the idea of misinterpretation was intro-
duced as a great way to break a womans state. You can also
use misinterpretation to ensure she immediately sees you as
a flirt...

You need to get really good at listening to things she says that
you can use for misinterpretion material. The best kinds are sex-
ual misinterpretations, but you can also misinterpret her as be-
ing ditzy, a bad ass, sex crazed, trying to impress you, paranoid,
dorky, or even a cute little puppy dog.

Anything you can do or find to misinterpret works because it


sets a romantic comedy vibe, which is something youre going
to hear us mention often during this course.

In Phase 2 though, you can take your misinterpretations even fur-


ther by adding in exaggeration/absurdity and then repetition. All
these comedy elements together create really powerful humor

58
Phase 2

that you can use and reuse throughout your interaction or date.

To do it right, lets begin with exaggeration. You want to take


the misinterpretation and make it even more absurd. Maybe
youre talking to a girl and she says she came out together
with her girl friend. You can misinterpret it as if as she meant
a lesbian girlfriend by saying, Oh, you have a girlfriend. Thats
so cool that youre open-minded like that. Do you have more
than one? Do they get jealous? Im not going to get jumped by
like ten jealous crazed softball players am I?

You took what she said (being out with her girl friend) and
misinterpreted it as a lesbian relationship. You then exagger-
ated it by saying, Do you have more than one? Do they get
jealous? Finally, you made it absurd by saying, Im not going
to get jumped by ten jealous crazed softball players am I?
Later on, you can bring it back up, by saying, Im a little ner-
vous Im going to get beat up by your jealous softball-playing
girlfriend...

Misinterpret + Exaggerate
(or Absurd) X Repeat

59
Phase 2

You can do this with just about any topic youre talking about,
just listen for opportunities...

For example, say youre talking to a girl and she says, Man, I
really need a drink. Well if she needs a drink, you can mister-
pret that as her being a raging alcoholic whos going to beat
her red-headed step child while streaking naked through Times
Square wearing only a cowboy hat.

Then you can just keep going back to it later, like if somebody
comes over to talk to you guys, you can say, You dont have
any step children do you? You better keep them away from
her.

Or maybe she says shes sick of guys. You can say something
like, You should draw a big smiley face on a pillow and carry it
around and then just scream at people how they dont under-
stand the love you feel. Either that or you can get some cats.
And then later, bring it up again. (But ONLY repeat these sorts
of teases if she laughed the first time!)

Then later, if shes talking about wanting to travel, you can go


back to your original misinterpretation by saying something
like, So is that where you and the pillowcase are going to go
on your honeymoon and make little pillowcases. Just con-
tinue with this absurd, borerline-stupid humor. As dumb as it
may sound now, it usually injects a fun and playful energy into
the interaction. If done right, shell even begin to play along.

60
Phase 2

Another way to misinterpret and exaggerate, and repeat is


through speculation, which means you guess or presume
why she did or said something.

Say youre talking to her and she calls you out on a pickup line
by saying, Oh thats a good pickup line. Heres how you
could speculate: Oh, are you saying that because no one usu-
ally talks to you? Cute.

Or if she tells you, Im going to law school, you could say,


Are you just saying that to impress me? Are you just trying to
get me home? And then later, to exaggerate it, you can tease
her by saying, Stop thinking about getting me home.

That example brings us to one of the easiest ways to execute


this sort of humor, which is also a GREAT way to establish yourself
as a flirt. You just begin a sentence with the phrase, Youre just
saying that because... and then make up some absurd story that
you can exaggerate and repeat. This is SO effective, we put it into
a formula:

Youre just saying that because... + Absurd story

61
Phase 2

Other good misinterpretions in this phase is when you finish


statements for her. Say she says, Im going to go... you can
finish her sentence by saying, ...get me a drink?

Or, maybe she says, For your information... you can finish it
by saying, ...That pet rock really was your best friend?

Another good one is when she says, I hate that... and you
finish with ...you cant wear pajamas to the bar and carry your
stuffed animal friends around.

The more absurd, the better. As she starts to say something,


jump in and finish it with something absurd. If she has a good
response, go right into the old misinterpret + exaggerate/
aburd x repeat formula! The beauty of this is it gives you ma-
terial you can go back to throughout the conversation.

62
Phase 2

How to Mess With Her To


Get the Upper Hand

I
n order to put her in her head and get the upper hand, it re-
ally helps to bullshit her a bit. This is so great because it
shows her that youre in control of the conversation. Women
love guys who challenge them. Not in the, Im much smart-
er than you way, but in a way that keeps them on their feet.
You want her not sure if what youre saying is serious or if youre
messing around.

One way to do this is by testing her gullibility. At some point in


the conversation I like to say something like, I have to be hon-
est with you, Im married with five kids at home, and see if she
believes it.

The great thing about that particular line is that it serves two
purposes. One, it tests her gullibility and lets you mess with her
a little bit, but you also get to see her reaction because, if youve
established yourself as a flirt and then you tell her that youre
married, theres SHOULD be a weird reaction from her. The more

63
Phase 2

offended or shocked she seems, the more interested she is in


you... and the better youre doing at making sure she sees you
as a flirt.

Another way to mess with her is to play dumb when shes ex-
plaining something. You can just keep saying, Can you repeat
that? and, at first, shes going to be thinking youre serious
and shes going to repeat it. Eventually shes going to catch on
and be like, You asshole.

Another great way to mess with her is by escalating the ab-


surdity. Maybe she asks you to name something like the jobs
youve had. You can start off with your normal jobs, like, I used
to wait tables, then I worked in a bank for a little bit, then I was
the guy that who cleaned up the sperm at the sperm bank.
You start off normal and create an escalation of absurdity.

This is what Rob calls the 3-step and spin move, which you
can use when a woman asks you interview-style questions.
Examples of an interview-style question is something like
where youre from or what you do for work. As tempting as it
may be to answer these questions with real, logical answers,
its your job as a man to make sure the conversation doesnt
get boring.

Unfortunately, for most of us, weve gotten burned in the past


because we let a conversation with a woman get TOO logical.
She becomes bored and wants to leave...

64
Phase 2

....EVEN IF SHE WAS THE ONE TO BRING UP THE INTERVIEW-


STYLE QUESTIONS!

That bring said, you also dont want to give answers that are
completely off-the-wall and only get her emotional. You want a
nice balance, which is 3 logical statements (3-step) followed
by an emotional joke or tease (and SPIN). The spin de-
pends on the humor element of unpredicability (mentioned in
the introduction). Here are some examples 3-steps and spins:

65
Phase 2

Dont, however, mistake 3-step and SPIN formula for a


ruleits just a framework! Depending on the situation, you
could make it a 1-step and SPIN or a 5-step and SPIN.

All thats important is striking a balance between logic and


emotion. By ending a string of logical statements with an emo-
tional tease, you keep the conversation lively and playful.

Just be careful! If used too much it can come off as scripted and
try-hard. Keep her guessing (which keeps her in her head!) by
answering a few of her questions ONLY with emotional state-
ments or ONLY with logical statements. Remember: unpredi-
cability!

Not only is 3-step and SPIN an excellent way to volley her


questions and keep things from becoming boring, you can also
use it as a conversational jujutsu strategy, as well. If youre
telling a story or explaining something, and you catch yourself
droning on with logic, simply add a SPIN to spike the con-
versation with emotion!

Real Answer + Real Answer


+ Real Answer + Absurdity

66
Phase 2

Statement Formula to Overcome


Friction & Get Her Laughing

O
nce you get in the habit of putting yourself on the
offensive with women, youre ALWAYS going to hit
some friction. She might say something nasty, tem-
porarily lose interest, or something might just go
awry for a moment. This happens to every guy in
every interaction...

...and most guys let it ruin their chances with a girl

...the pro move, however, is to use these moments to get her


laughing.

This is huge. A big difference between guys who are good with
women and guys who are NOT is this: can he keep his cool in mo-
ments of emotional friction? When a womans behavior sudden-
ly becomes difficult does the guy make a big deal over it? Does
he get frantic? Or can he transform that moment into something
that will get her laughing?

67
Phase 2

The easiest way to get women laughing in these situations is


by using a specific statement. Its what we like to call a bum-
per statement. We call it that because you dont go along
with her bad behavior or cave in to the friction... but you also
dont fight her objectioni nstead you BUMP it!

The word bump is important because its not supplicating


like a wimp, yet its also not being a hard ass like a dickits
somewhere in between. This is the sweet spot for attractive
humor.Basically, shes trying to put YOU in YOUR head and
bump statements make sure you continue to pace the conver-
sation.

Heres how to do it: the first half of a bumper statement is to


AGREE with whatever she says. I know might sound strange,
but if you disagree with her when shes acting like this, its
only going to create MORE friction. Since the purpose of flirt-
ing is simply letting things FLOW, you DONT want anything to
disrupt that.

If she says your shirt looks terrible, you say it really does. If she
calls you immature or dumb, you say that you couldnt agree
more. No matter what she says, your response is that shes
absolutely right.

After you glide over the friction with an agreement, THEN you
state your REAL opinion in an absurd or light-hearted way. This
part might be a little tricky for guys who arent yet comfortable

68
Phase 2

improvising on the spot. If that sounds like you, then you may
find it helpful to have a few go-to bumper statements up
your sleeve. Often guys who seem rock-solid confident (even
when a girl is acting like a complete bitch) maintain their cool
by having a few bumper statements in their back pocket to
use in common situations.

As an example, imagine you ask a woman for her a phone num-


ber and she says, I dont give my number out. Some guys
would freak out and start saying all sorts of weird things like,
Why not? or, Okay, then can I give you my number?

Weak.

You, however, know to bump her objection with a cool, con-


fident response: Oh cool, I have the same rule. So well make
an exception for each other. Youre not forcing an outcome
by being a hard ass and trying to coerce her into giving up or
number. Yet you dont slink away with your tail between your
legs like a wimp. Heres the formula for bumper statements:

Agree with her objection + State your real


reply in an absurd or funny way

69
Phase 2

The purpose of bumper statements is to get her laughing, which


moves you closer to your objective. Whenever you encounter
a moment of resistance or friction, stay on your coursebut
also add some fun and playfulness to the vibe.

Here are a few more bumper statement examples for common


situations youll probably find yourself in. You might want to
try a few of these or come up with your own bumper state-
ments.

She says: I cant kiss you! We just met!


Bumper statement: You are so right, we should have a
proper courtship first. But when you look so cute, how
can you blame me?

She says: You seem nervous, are you okay?


Bumper statement: Thats because I totally am. My
heart is practically jumping out of my chest because I
finally found the only cute nerd in Vegas!

She says: Are you drunk?


Bumper statement: Fuck yeah! Drunk on being awe-
some!

Remember: this strategy is not built on hilarious lines. Its built


on staying calm and having a quick response on the tip of your
tongue. While you may need to consciously remind yourself to
apply the bumper statement strategy, dont blow it out of

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Phase 2

proportion. Be chill about it and deliver the statement as if its


a natural reflex.

Note: Perceptive readers probably see how similar this is to


the If by _______ you mean _____, then yes! template cov-
ered in misinterpretations in the last phase. Both templates
hinge on twisting what she said into something that works in
your favor.

The major difference, however, is that the If by ____ tem-


plate is meant as a super quick, on-the-fly reply (because youre
using that to break her state, which often gives you very little
response time).

A bumper statement, on the other hand, requires a little more


verbal riffing. You should be mixing and matching the vari-
ous humor elements to really supercharge your bumper state-
ments. (In three examples, notice how much radical truth is
built into the responses.)

71
Part 2: Establishing Youre a Flirt

Bantering >You and I arent gonna get along!


>You guys arent tourists are you?
>You usually hang out at the li-
brary dont you?
>Okay, Note to self: dont date her...

Tips 1. jokingly putting some sort of bar-


rier between you (e.g, a divorce) is
great for humor...but always wait un-
til shes interested in you first!
2. Make sure that she knows youre being

O U playful when you try lines like this!

Shes n Y
o
Hitting >Did you put roofies in my drink?
> Stop undressing me with your eyes...
>Youre looking at me like a fat kid
looks at a cheeseburger!

Tips 1. The old flip-the-script comedy rou-


tine works great because it plays on
reversed gender roles!
2. This humor works wonders when a
girl knows you like her, but if you
havent clearly expressed interest in
her. avoid these lines otherwise she
might think youre gay!

72
Part 2: Establishing Youre a Flirt

m e ss e r
ing with h >Now are you just making shit up
as you go along?
>Its a good thing youre pretty,
cause once the looks go youll be in
trouble...

Tips 1. These sorts of lines work great on


girls with high self-esteam who en-
joy to be teased a little!
2. Anticipate some good comebacks be-

n e s cause shell probably tease you a bit


too when you say these lines.

cran li
ky or mean >I bet you have a real cute side
somewhere. You just dont show it!
>love it when you talk mean to me!
>Weve got Grumpy Smurf hEre!

Tips 1. This type of humor works best when a


girl is acting up but sort of knows it.
Great for girlfriends!
2. So much of the success or failure of
these lines will rest on your deliv-
ery, so be sure to keep it playful!

73
Module 2

Part 2: establishing youre a flirt

Why you need to establish yourself as a flirt


Goal of this phase is to set up the expectation that youre
hitting on her

Theory of Expectations
How we imagine someone to be is how well view them
If we think someone is funny we start laughing before
they finish the joke
The sooner she knows youre flirting, the more she be-
gins to take your jokes as flirting
Youre also establishing that you are socially intelligent
One well-timed banter line displays a ton more social in-
telligence than any story you tell or thing you brag about

74
Phase 2

Youre displaying that YOU are


controlling the interaction
When you sort of take the lead and bring things to a fun
level youre taking on the more dominant frame
Shell follow your lead
Youre displaying confidence
To make a joke is taking a risk, asking her where shes
from doesnt. So anytime you take a risk youre show-
ing her youre confident enough in yourself.
The early create a humorous flirty vibe, the easier it is
going forward
This comes back to the Theory of Expectations. But also,
you can establish threads you can call back later and
use throughout the interaction
Youre placing the conversation spotlight on the two of
you
Ideally everything in this phase is about your reaction to
her and her reaction to you
The sweet spot is humor arriving from the situation.
Telling funny stories is not really good in this phase.

Characteristics: What are the elements of the


second phase
A majority of the humor in this phase involves you teas-
ing her
Tease her about characteristics not traits
Her bossy side

75
Phase 2

Her blonde site


Misinterpreting stuff shes saying
Twisting her words

The humor here can have a little more bite to it


Youre a member of the Tea Party arent you?
Nothing personal.. And if she says yes, I am a member
of the Tea Party dont insult her or joke more about.
Just nod your head slowly and say I knew it
Youre setting up a role that the both of you can act out
later on
So say you made a joke about Tea Party.. which is very
conservative.. youre essentially giving her the role of
conservative girl that youre trying to corrupt. The
humor can then flow from that role. If you give her the
role of being bossy you can come back to that later.

How you know its working


She playfully calls you a jerk or an asshole
Shes trying not to laugh.. but cant help it.

You must make a Statement of intent


To make her horny with humor you must acknowledge
at some point that is not simply a friendly conversation.
Something like Your perfume is turning me onget
away from me or Dont think that sexy smile is gonna
win me over

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Phase 2

Examples of Phase 2 humor


Overcome shit tests
Respond to the boyfriend objection
Respond to any objections she has about you
Avoid interview mode
Create the you and me vibe
Bring up sex in a fun way
As a fun way to open her

Teasing: What to tease her on...


Bossy side
Blonde site
Paranoid
Wild side
Naveness or gullibility

So say youre talking to a woman and she tells you a story


about how she reprimanded one of her co-workers for cutting
in front of her at the copy machine. You could say:
Nice.. a girl with a bossy side. Are you one of those girls
who throws a temper tantrum when she doesnt get her
way?
(Stomp your feet on the ground in mock temper tantrum)
Thats cool though. I like bossy girls. Just not in the bed-
room. You dont have any whips or chains hanging under
your bed?

77
Phase 2

More teasing Examples


Call her dude: Dude listen (then whatever you were
gona say) good because it makes her wonder if you
see her has one of the guys
Youre complicated: When shes complicated or confus-
ing. You can come back to this one later on
Accuse of her using girl logic- weird emotional deci-
sions
I thought you were rich and could support me: Oh youre
still in school know truss fund? Rich uncle?

Mistakes to Avoid
Teasing vs. Being an asshole
Knowing when to drop the banter: Although you can
keep throwing the occasional banter or tease through-
out the night.. after establishing that youre flirting
youre ready to move to next phase (which involves less
teasing and bantering)

78
Phase 3:
Rapport
through humor
Create rapport and bond with her, using a milder form of
humor; humanize yourself, share funny stories,
and get her investing...

I
f a woman doesnt feel comfortable around you, she proba-
bly also will not feel comfortable sleeping with you. You can
get women laughing and even get them horny using humor,
but if you cant also get her to see you as a real person
then shes eventually going to stop laughing and leave...and
youre going to go home with a raging set blue balls (true story!).

Thats why its SO IMPORTANT you get her comfortable with you.
And an easy way to do that while also keeping the vibe fresh and
fun is to generate rapport through humor, which is Phase 3 of
the Make Her Horny with Humor course!

One of the first mindsets you need to adopt in order to do this


consistently is to convey yourself (and your life) in a way thats
forthcoming, honest, a little vulnerable, while keeping it enter-
taining and funny. Girls usually call guys names like creepy, weird,

79
Phase 3

douche, fake, etc. because these guys put up walls around


their real personality and hide the true aspects of their lives.

Just think of guys you know who are usually called these names.
Often its because these guys act in a stereotypical way. If
youre acting like a stereotype, by definition, youre not be-
ing yourself because who you are is inherently unique and
non-stereotypical. Thats why youre going to see less turn-
key examples and lines in this section and more templates
and ways to convey YOUR stories and YOUR personality.

Still, on the audio and in this section youre going to get plenty
of examples. While you SHOULD pay attention to the concepts
and ideas the examples demonstrate, you SHOULD NOT recite
the examples as if they were scripts. If you do, you probably
will NOT get a good reaction from women because youre not
Bobby Rio or Rob Judge.

Youre you and so hopefully youre excited to learn how to


convey YOUR personality and identity in a fun, attractive way.
And your absolute best materials for this phase is to be found
in

SHARED EXPERIENCES!

You are probably going to be sick of hearing about shared ex-


periences by the end of the section, but its SO important we
cant emphasize it enough! By shared experiences, were re-

80
Phase 3

ferring to anecdotes and stories that get her to feel or under-


stand an emotion. Some topics that immediately should come
to mind are childhood memories, funny stories that just hap-
pened, moments and characters from pop culture, and the
story of YOU and HER (that will make more sense when you
learn about the Us Vibe! in this phase!)

Now that you understand what most of your humorous rap-


port will focus on, lets move into the specifics!

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Phase 3

Cool Vulnerability: The Secret


Hack to Humorous Rapport

B
efore we delve into to the techniques and templates
for generating humorous and attractive rapport with
women, you first need to accept a CRUCIAL attitude
that will make you unstoppable with women, some-
thing we call cool vulnerability.

When you display cool vulnerability to women you make yourself


stand out from every other guy whos displaying the OPPOSITE
of cool vulnerability, which is uncool fronting.

Uncool fronting is what happens when a guy is talking to a wom-


an and hes trying so hard to make a good impression on her that
he only tells stories, makes comments, or behaves in a way that
he thinks is portraying himself as super cool guy. Here are just a
few symptoms of uncool fronting:
Exaggerating the details of a story so the storyteller ap-
pears cooler
Making a mistaken or doing something awkward and

82
Phase 3

then hoping that a woman didnt notice


Making a job sound more important than it really is
Only telling stories that end with something good hap-
pening to the storyteller
Desperately hiding a flaw

At some point, weve all been guilty of uncool fronting. Since


we all want to seem confident and charming and attractive to
the women were interested in, we think anything that makes
us seem vulnerable or appear uncool is going to cause her to
think less of us.

Ironically, however, THAT is actually EXACTLY what causes


girls to lose attraction most of the time! Uncool fronting gives
her the EXACT OPPOSITE impression of us, making her think
were insecure and annoying. This is why girls flake, exit con-
versations (when she says the dreaded, Ill be right back!
and never does), or just avoids meeting up.

Uncool fronting is unattractive in any phase of a seduction,


but its especially detrimental when developing rapport. This
is when you should be telling her stories from your life and
bonding over shared experiences. So if youre only picking sto-
ries that are flattering and/or make you look like a cool guy
then youre going to turn her off FAST.

And, unfortunately, if you blow it in the rapport phase with un-


cool fronting its going to be near impossible to get a second

83
Phase 3

chance. Shes just going to write you off as an insecure loser

...ensure that never happens by displaying plenty of cool vul-


nerability. You do this by telling her a story that shows you in a
vulnerable situation... or by pointing out a humorous mistake
you made... or by simply shining a spotlight on one of your
flaws

and you always do it in a humorous way

Not only is she going to feel really comfortable around you be-
cause youre keeping it real, shes also going to see how rock-
solid confident you are. A huge secret most guys never figure
out is that confidence is NOT revealed during high points. ANY
guy can appear confident when everything is going his way.

TRUE confidence is on display when youre faced with an ob-


stacle or adversary and can maintain your composure. The
epitome of maintaining composure is being able to make
jokes. Think about the last time you were nervous or scared
as hellwas making people laugh on the top of your list of
things to do?

In fact, Hollywood plays on this concept ALL THE TIME, espe-


cially in action and adventure movies. The reason Hans Solo
cracks jokes even when his life is in danger is because thats a
very simple and direct way to show his characters confidence
and trust in himself.

84
Phase 3

When you use cool vulnerability to generate rapport, it works


like a hack because you describe an adverse/unfavorable
situation, but do it in a humorous way. That demonstrates
rock-solid confidence. (Its like Hans Solo making jokes as hes
about to be frozen in carbonite!)

While every other guy is busy uncool fronting, youre not afraid
to tell less unflattering stories because youre THAT sure of
yourself. Other guys might break into a cold sweat if a girl
heard about the time they got totally embarrassed, but you
not only TELL HERyou actually laugh over it!

Some ways I display cool vulnerability on EVERY date I go on is


by telling stories like:
The time I bumped into my ex-girlfriend with her new
boyfriend and it was super awkward
The time I got totally embarrassed in third grade when
my whole class caught me in an elaborate lie
How much of a huge nerd I am

Rather than avoid these topics, I actually BRING THEM UP!

Oh, and if I EVER make a mistake on a date, say something


stupid, act a little creepy or awkward, stutter, or even get ner-
vousguess what I do? CALL IT OUT! I make it into a joke.
Rather than get nervous and hope she didnt catch my mis-
take, I MAKE SURE she caught it!

85
Phase 3

Once you see for yourself the attractiveness of cool vulner-


ability, be careful that it doesnt get SO addicting that you
start going into complete self-deprecating mode. Remember:
youre not putting yourself down or making fun of yourself

....youre simply seeing the humor in moments you were vul-


nerable and/or less-than-perfect.

86
Phase 3

The 3-Step Formula to Telling


the Perfect Funny Story

T
o generate REAL rapport during this phase, both you
and her are going to be speaking a lot longer to each
other. In the early phases of humor, the dialogue is
pretty punchy and back-and-forth. When its time to
generating rapport, however, youll give each other
more speaking time to tell more personal information and
deeper thoughts.

The most obvious example is storytelling. While we cant cover


ALL the details of storytelling here, we can tell you where to lo-
cate your funny stories and then give you a simple 3-step
formula as well as a way to inject laughs and entertainment into
your stories.

Some of your best humor through rapport stories are your


childhood/adolescent memories. Think about these moments
from your life:
First kiss

87
Phase 3

Embarrassing moment from grammar school


Awesome high school teacher
First drunken experience
Scariest/craziest moment from childhood
First girlfriend
Things you thought were cool when you were a kid

Most likely you have stories for all these ideas and you can
safely bet the woman youre speaking with does, too. As such,
you will quickly and easily create a solid connection just by tell-
ing your story.

(And if you sprinkle some humor into the story, its going to
work like gangbusters!)

Some guys dont believe they can pull off telling a funny sto-
ry, but its easy if you know how to approach it. Its not like
youre delivering a best man speech or even a presentation at
workyoure simply reciting a personalthough humorous
and entertainingmemory.

Thankfully telling an entertaining and humorous story isnt


some impossible task. Once you have a memory or mo-
ment you want to share, you simple put it through our simple
3-step template then add humorous details (which well
explain in the next section)and youre ready to get women
thinking youre a charming and hilarious storyteller!

88
Phase 3

The three-step template just needs your answers to three and


a half questions about your moment:
Step 1: The Situation (What did you want?)
Step 2: The Complication (What was the obstacle?)
Step 3: The Resolution (What ended up happening?)
Step 3: Is there a punchline?

What did you want + Conflict to that goal


+ Success/Failure of goal + Possible Punchline

This formula is the classic joke formula: introduce a situa-


tion (A woman and a duck walk into a bar...), then a com-
plication, which usually involves a conflict (...The bartender
says, Whered you get the pig....) and its consequence (...
The woman says, Thats not a pig, thats a duck...), and end
with the resolution (...so the bartender says, I was talking
to the duck.). With jokes, the resolution is the punchline.

But dont get it confused! Funny stories are NOT jokes. They
just SHARE 3-act/step formula with jokes. The situation (act
1/beginning) > complication (act 2/middle) > resolution (act 3/
end) formula! More importantly, not EVERY funny story needs
a punchline (its only half a step afterall!). Most of your story
humor will come from quirky details, funny phrases, and unex-

89
Phase 3

pected twists, which will mostly be in the complication.

An old screenwriting maxim explains the three-step formula


as this: Put a character up in a tree (the situation), throw rocks
at him (the complication), then get him down (the resolution).
As you read more about the 3 steps below remain mindful that
youre NOT telling jokes. Youre telling stories. Now that you
understand the basic formula lets delve into more detail...

1. The Situation: What did you (the protagonist)


want?
Usually this is pretty obvious, if your story is about a first kiss
then usually the answer to your question is a first kiss. How-
ever, if you want to take your story a level deeper, and make it
EVEN FUNNIER, try to drill down a level deeper than the obvi-
ous to create an interesting (and funny) situation. Remember:
less predictable/expected = more humor/laughter!

For example, you may be telling a first kiss story, and obvious-
ly you wanted your first kiss, but WHY did you REALLY want
that first kiss?
Maybe it was to impress your friends or to see what it
was like, or...
Maybe it was because you finally wanted to kiss your
crush, or...
Maybe it was during a Truth or Dare game and you

90
Phase 3

didnt want to seem like a nerd by chickening out,


or...

Bland stories are about the obvious. GREAT stories (the type
that REALLY turn women on, captivate their attention, and
get them laughing uncontrollably) go a level DEEPER than the
obvious. You want the situations your stories set up to contain
LOTS of anticipation for whats going to happen next.

Remember, since YOU are the main character of most of the


stories you tell, you want a woman to CARE ABOUT the main
character of your story (I mean, its usually you afterall!). And
the BEST way to get a woman to care is by setting up a situ-
ation she wants to hear more about!

Thats why you want to give the situation of your story care-
ful attention and REALLY hone on and unexpected interesting
motivation!

2. The Confrontation: When you went after your


goal, what obstacle did you encounter (a.k.a. con-
flict and consequence)?
Before getting into the specifics, lets takes a moment to de-
fine conflict and consequence. A conflict is when a char-
acter is challenged, confronted, put on the spot, opposed, etc.
Usually conflicts are what a character has to overcome when

91
Phase 3

pursuing a goal. But in a humorous story, sometimes they can


just be moments that add some comedy.

Consequences are what happens NEXT, the result of a con-


flict. When you describe a character encountering a situation,
does the situation go well or poorly? Did the conflict change
your characters motivation? Outlook? Goal? (After a conflict
something SHOULD change!) And most importantly, what
does your character do NEXT?

Thus, a good story nothing more than a character wanting


something that leads to a chain of conflicts and consequences,
which ends in a final resolution (sometimes capped off with a
punchline). Moreover, FUNNY stories often have one or more
of these story elements:
An offbeat situation
A quirky character(s)
An unexpected twist(s)
A strange or awkward conflict
A funny opponent (someone who opposes your char-
acter)
Interesting/funny phrases
Humorous delivery (how you tell the story)

A story about a first kiss where you smooched your junior high
girlfriend at the end of a date isnt a story. Its simply a fact.
As you know, the ying and yang of a STORY is the CONFLICT
and CONSEQUENCE. The main character SHOULD encounter

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Phase 3

some sort of confrontation, which leads to a conflict, which


results in some sort of consequence. Otherwise, you dont re-
ally have a story.

That doesnt mean the confrontation needs to be some epic


struggle or showdown Some stories will have such moments.
But with a lot of your stories, youre going to find your con-
frontation in more subtle (and less obvious) conflicts.

For example, if your first kiss story seems as simple as smooch-


ing your junior high girlfriend at the end of a date, start racking
your brain for what else happened like: were you nervous
before you kissed her? Did she have bad breath? Did you sud-
denly pop a boner right before it happened? Afraid her par-
ents might catch you?

Even if the threat was minor, adding conflict makes what


youre saying INTERESTING because it puts the main charac-
ters goal in JEAPORDY. Will you or wont you get what you
want? And what will the consequences be?

Again, the more time you think this over, the funnier your sto-
ries will be. If you think of a REALLY interesting, threatening,
and/or humorous confrontation, your story is going to kick
ass. But if your confrontation is obvious then your story will
probably be uninteresting and, unless you add some REALLY
humorous details, very unfunny.

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Phase 3

Really try to go back and get into your head at the time. Pin-
point the thoughts and feelings and fears and emotions you
felt when the moment was happening. Anything interesting
there? Hopefully the answer is yes!

Pro tip: sometimes listening to music that you liked during that
time in your life can trigger some material for your stories
try it!

Once you have your confrontation, hold onto it for the next
the section! Since this is the most important element of your
story (and the part that youre going to spend about 90% of
the time on when reciting), its CRUCIAL you dont just gloss
over the conflict or simply state it like a fact, e.g., I was really
nervous before my first kiss because I didnt know what to ex-
pect

Instead, to pack the most humor and emotion into your sto-
ries, pinpoint specific episodes, events, and scenes that SHOW
the conflict. WORK THE DETAILS!

For example, if you were really nervous before your kiss, using
a detail or two to highlight that will make your story pop. For
example, you might try to identify something that happened
as you prepared yourself for the unexpectedlike an event
or scenethat REALLY demonstrates that.

Like maybe your equally inexperienced friend thought itd be

94
Phase 3

a good idea you take a condom with you just in caseand


so you had it in your pocket but right as you were about to kiss
your junior high girlfriend the condom fell out of your pocket,
she noticed, and freaked out.

This scene is a bit ridiculous, but its to demonstrate a point:


WHEN YOU THINK OF CONFLICT, THINK OF SPECIFIC SCENES
AND MOMENTS! THINK OF DETAILS!

Simply stating a confrontation is not very funny and certainly


wont evoke much emotion in a woman. A description, how-
ever, usually IS humorous and almost always gets women en-
gaged in your story.

So make a list of possible scenes, details, feelings, and mo-


ments that demonstrate your conflict. Dont worry if every-
thing you list isnt good or funny. You can always leave stuff
out, but it really helps the creative process to make a complete
list so you have the luxury of choosing the details that have
the best comedic potential (which were going to discuss in
the next section, so hold on!)

3. Resolution: Did you accomplish your goal? (If


so, what happened? What did you gain?) OR did
you NOT get what you wanted? (If so, what did
you get instead? What did you discover?)

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Phase 3

Every story needs an endingespecially humorous stories.


Sometimes your humorous stories can end with a punch line
(which is the half-of-a-step). For example, Rob has a story
about trying to discover his nationality when he was a kid that
ends with the line, Thats when I realized that my grandma
was crazy!

While a punch line is NOT necessary for a humorous story


(which is why its only half a step), you should have some way
to signal to a woman that your story is over so that she feels
its her turn to share a story or anecdote from her life.

Dont sweat over your ending too much though. Youre not
competing for some literary prize or trying to shock her with
a crazy twist or unexpected ending.

As you know, most of the heavy lifting of the story will take
place in the middle, the confrontation. Thats where youre
going to add your funny details. That being said, it does help if
your ending isnt COMPLETELY obvious. For example, Id prob-
ably rather hear the story about your first FAILED first kiss than
your actual first kiss because the failed first kiss is probably
funnier and more interesting.

I know for myself, when a woman asks me about losing my vir-


ginity, since the REAL story is kinda bland and straightforward
(lost it to my girlfriend when I was 17 at a house partyyawn!),
I usually tell a quick SUMMARY of that story (very much like I

96
Phase 3

just wrote it here) and then say...


But a better story is when I ALMOST lost my virgin-
ity in the back of a McDonalds parking lot and tell
THAT story instead.

Remember: youre NOT really swapping facts about your life


in this phase. While the facts are a nice bonus, the more im-
portant aspect of rapport through humorous storytelling is
SWAPPING EMOTIONS.

How I acted the time I almost lost my virginity is more telling


of who I am than taking my girlfriend upstairs to a bedroom at
a house party.

In fact, a good exercise would be to go back through the last 3


steps and pick one or two ALMOST stories, where appropri-
ate. (For example, your ALMOST first kiss, the girl you WISHED
was your first girlfriend, etc.)

3. Resolution: Is there a punchline in this story


(optional)?
Finally, see if theres a way you can end your story with a joke
or a witty phrase. Some places to look for punchlines are:
Something funny or ironic a character in your story
said or did (e.g., When we woke up the next morn-
ing, all my best friend Dan could say was, Im glad you

97
Phase 3

only go to the prom once because that was the worst


night of my life.)
A new attitude or stance (e.g., Thats why I never
went to another sleep-away camp...will never send
my kids to a sleep-away camp...in fact, Id lobby the
government to ban sleep-away camps completely!)
The irony of wanting one thing (step 1) but getting
something else (step 3) (e.g., Up until then, I thought
G.I. Joe action figures were the shit, but that day made
me realize girls are way cooler...even if I had to play
with some Barbies to discover that!

The next section on details will make finding a punchline easi-


er. But its important to remember:
1. Punchlines ARE NOT necesary...this isnt a stand-up
routine so much of the humor is going to come from
your details!
2. If you are going to use a punchline, make sure it doesnt
suck...you might want to test your punchline out on
friends before trying it on a woman. Sometimes what
we think is a funny punchline isnt and it could come
across as try-hard and lame.

Lets look quicky at the 3-step thought process to tell a story in


response to, What did you major in when you were in college?
And, for this example, lets say the guy had a unique major (fine
art), heres how his mind may work (diagram on the next page)...

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How to Amplify Her Laughter


10-Fold with Effortless Details

O
nce you have the backbone of your story mapped
out with our 3-step formula, its time to bring it
to life with funny and memorable details. This sec-
tion is chock-full of templates because we want to
make this as easy and turnkey as possible for you.
Still, you need to do your homework and brainstorm details that
really pop.

The more you tell your stories, the better your details will be-
come. Thats why once you have a few good stories, get your-
self in the habit of practicing them whenever you caneven if
your audience isnt a hot woman. The more you tell a story, the
sooner youll know which details work and which dont.

That being said, heres where add humorous details are to these
elements of your story:
Charactersthe BEST characters to detail are either part
of the conflict (e.g., a girls pissed off dad) or a catalyst

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to the resolution (e.g., your wingman). HOWEVER,


dont go overboard! Try and limit your character de-
scriptions to ONE sentence that details the quality or
characteristic most relevant to the story (unless the
story is specifically about a character).

Feelingsespecially YOUR feelings during and/or af-


ter the conflict but describing other peoples feelings
(or at least what you THINK other people were feel-
ing) can be funny, as well. The EASIEST way to convey
a feeling is through metaphor.

A bystander or crowds reaction to the conflictthis


can really provide good context to a story and inject
some unexpected humor. Usually the crowd or by-
standers reaction should contradict your feelings (e.g.
if the story was about heckling a pitcher at a baseball
game, the crowd should be on the side of the pitcher
because that amplifies the conflict and humor of the
situation) OR ELSE the crowd/bystanders reaction
should change due to action in the story (e.g., imagine
if you told a story about the worst prom date ever
where your prom date hooked up with one of your
friends so you tried to drink away your sorrows, caus-
ing you to puke in the rented limo, which enraged the
limo driver, and he tried to make you pay to have it
cleaned but when you told him why you were so drunk
he took you to McDonalds, bought you a Big Mac, and

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gave you life advice)

The when of the storysometimes the season,


month, day, or the year that your story happened is
important so its worth adding a detail to make it stand
out, but sometimes it works to simply throw in the
when because it adds some nostalgia (which gen-
erates rapport) as well as provides quick stand-by
jokes you can recycle for any story in that time period
(e.g., telling a story that takes place in the 80s and
saying, This was back in the 80s when no one had
stopped believing per the advice of Journey).

A placesometimes WHERE something happened


is important to the story. Keep the descriptions of a
place VERY brief (unless the story is about a place).
As with characters, the best way to detail a place is
by highlighting the ONE aspect or quality of the place
most relevant to the story (e.g., if you were describ-
ing a crazy dive bar from your college years, you might
say, This place was so lax on checking IDs a note from
my mom would get me in.).

Nowtime for templates! Here are some ways you can super-
charge your details so they get women laughing so hard, they
cant stop thinking about your stories (and, because of that,
cant stop thinking about YOU)

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Metaphors/Similescomparing one thing to another is the


fastest and easiest way to jazz up your story details. This works
especially well for quick character descriptions.

The humor of a good metaphor lies in picking something that is


incongruent, yet has a shared quality that makes sense. DONT
simply pair random things together! When youre picking a
metaphor think of the quality youre trying to describe FIRST
and then start thinking of ridiculous things/people/groups/etc.
that (weirdly) share that quality.

To add more humor, take it a step further by spilling some


metaphor characteristics onto whatever youre describing (In
the example below, the old lady metaphor is spilled onto the
friend character by adding: making sure he was asleep by
9pm to be well-rested for a big Saturday of clipping coupons
and playing Bingo.)

Detail to convey: A friend who preferred to stay home


on Friday and Saturday nights.
Once the weekends rolled around, it was like he
joined the old lady club, making sure he was asleep
by 9pm to be well-rested for a big Saturday of clip-
ping coupons and playing Bingo.

Detail to convey: An ex-girlfriends dog that hated you.


This dog had a hatred of me that Id only heard
about in rap songsmy first run-in with a legitimate

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hater!

Plug-in Metaphor Templates...


(Character) was/is a(n) (adjective, e.g. male/female,
old lady/old man) version of (Metaphor, pop culture
references works really well here, e.g., Kanye West/R.
Kelly) because (quality shared)
Tom is like a male version of Taylor Swift because
that dude never shuts up about his exs!

(Character) is/was acting/behaving like a (noun,


e.g.,diva/loudmouth or complex noun e.g., a
fat kid told he couldnt have seconds)
Whenever Tom gets a crush he acts like a 10-year-old
boy who just got his first boner...out of control and
totally desperate!

Quirky phrasingspeppering your stories with a few offbeat


adjectives and phrases is a great way to add depth while inject-
ing humor. Start looking out for good adjectives and phrases
to use in your stories.

Once you start looking, youll find an abundance of quirky ad-


jectives and phrases in movies, books, and television shows.
You can dress up your stories with these phrasal gems without
much effort or thought at alljust throw them in when you
want to get a laugh or make something in your story standout.
Detail to convey: An elaborate date you planned for a

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girl when you were high school.


I envisioned this date as being the most romantic
date in the history of romance!

Plug-in Quirky Phrasings Templates...


the magic of (activity being describing)
Tom and I were enjoying the magic of 2-for-1 Happy
Hour drinks.

(Scene youre about to describe)future high


school students will one day study it like they now
study Shakespeare.
What happened to Tom and I that night was so epic
that high school students will one day study it like they
now study Shakespeare.

Pop Culture Tieusing pop culture to convey story details


generates fast and humorous rapport. Theres plenty of guid-
ance on how to use pop culture humorously in this course, but
to convey story details, its often best to pair your pop culture
references with an adjective and/or modifying word.

Detail to convey: A cool high school teacher


My English teacher in junior year of high school was
like a non-drug addicted Tommy Lee.

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Plug-in pop culture Tie Templates...


(person described)...looked kinda like...(pop culture
tie)...if...[delivery note: pause for comic effect](pop
culture tie) gained about 200 pounds.
Tom ended up making out with a girl who looked
kinda like Katy Perry...if Katy Perry gained about 200
pounds.

(person/behavior described)...is like a...(pop culture


tie)without/instead of...(what pop culture tie is
know for)
Tom parked and we jumped out of the car like Bat-
man and Robin, except instead of the Batmobile we
were hopping out of a 97 Honda Accord.

Emotional Equivalencebecause our feelings are so abstract


and personal, its hard for someone to really grasp where youre
coming from when you say, I was mad or I was confused.
However, if you use a metaphor to clarify an emotion, sudden-
ly what youre trying to convey is more understandable. And
if you pick a humorous metaphor, you can also make it funny.

Detail to convey: Being at happy hour with your boss


I just wanted to go home but my boss ordered an-
other round of shots making me feel like the nerd in
junior high getting peer pressure by the cool kids.

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Plug-in emotional equivalence Templates...


(Reason for physical pain)...feeling like I got into a
street fight with(funny person/group who could
inflict pain)
After two days of Cross Fit I woke up feeling like
Id gotten into a street fight with a gang of midget
wrestlers.
the sort of...(feeling)...I thought only existed in...
(funny reference, pop culture or high art works well)
Toms crush on Sally was the sort of unrequited
love I thought only existed in Italian love sonnets or
something of that nature.

Inflated Expectationsa great way to electrify step 1 is by


inflating the expectations (the goal) because it adds humor
when the conflict sets in or when reality contradicts the ex-
pectations. This works especially well for nostalgic childhood
stories because it captures how innocent and nave we all were
at that time.

Detail to convey: Your first school dance in high school


I was so excited because I thought the Winter For-
mal was going to be this formal black-tie gala
(Later in the story, to make it humorous, you should
poke fun at how ridiculous your expectations were,
e.g., Little did I realize the Winter Formal was just a
DJ playing Shaggy songs in a dusty gym to awkward
13-year-olds groping each other on the dance floor!)

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Plug-in inflated expectations Templates...


I envisioned/imagined/expected...(an outrageous-
ly exaggerated depiction)
The way Tom described Sally, I imagined her to be
some undiscovered supermodel.

maybe I was just optimistic/misinformed/too trust-


ing, BUT...(description of a job , try to use verbiage
that sounds like a very over-the-top job description)
Maybe I was just optimistic, but I had thought this
internship was going to be a serious workplace learn-
ing opportunity that would equip me with the skills
necessary for a bright future in publishing

Specificsadding very specific details to your story accom-


plishes three very important things: 1.) it heightens the emo-
tional impact, 2.) it makes the story more real (strengthen-
ing the rapport), 3.) and it can sometimes add humor. That
said, there is one VERY big drawback to adding specifics: it can
make your story boring! So dont overdo specific. Sprinkling in
2 or 3 specifics is usually enough. Dont go overboard and feel
like you need to describe EVERYTHING. Try and pick out a few
interesting/funny specifics.
Detail to convey: The first car you wanted to buy
I wanted this Camaro so badan 86 muscle car,
cherry-red with black interior and it had this slight
dent in the hood that looked like a devious smirk,
making it even MORE AWESOME!

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Plug-in inflated expectations Templates...


it was a (describe weather) day when
It was a strangely very warm day in October when
Tom and I decided to take a roadtrip upstate
I remember it cost (exact amount down to the
cents)
Even though I didnt even like her, I bought her a
drink anyway and that round of drinks cost 14 dol-
lars and 37 cents plus I left a 2 dollar tip, making it 16
dollars and 37 cents I will forever regret spending!

Finally if youre going to bragSometimes you WILL tell sto-


ries where you come off as cool or awesome. While its not
recommended you launch into these stories right away, some-
times if a woman asks about your job or your car or something
else that is brag-worthy its okay to take pride in things
youve accomplished...

...but to keep things humorous, maintain the rapport, and avoid


coming off like a cocky douchebag make sure to immediately
scale the brag back with something a little self-deprecating.
(And dont worry, shell still be impressed by your accomplish-
ments, but when you scale it back with humor, shell also feel
comfortable that she can relate to you.) Here are some ways
to do that

A which is like joke...


I went to college on a cross-country track scholar-

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ship which is like getting a free education in return


for looking like I had an eating disorder for 4 years.

A so I guess that makes me joke


I taught myself to code apps at my kitchen table
which led me to start my company so I guess that
makes me the biggest nerd youre going to talk to
for the next month and a half.

A ...but I didnt do it because (douche reason)I


did it because (funny reason) joke
I didnt buy a Maserati because I wanted to im-
press chicks or look cool, I did it because when I was
17-years-old my dad told me I couldnt buy this red
Camero I really wanted because he thought Id re-
gret wasting my money on a flashy carso now that
Im 30, Im proving him wrong by wasting my money
on an even flashier car.

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Phase 3

Create the Us Vibe, Role


Play It, and Shes Yours

M
uch of creating rapport through humor means
creating inside jokes between you and a girl.
Sometimes when youre interacting with a real-
ly funny or witty girl, shell establish some good
jokes but most of the time, it will be YOUR job to
create that vibe.

And probably the easiest way to do this is by getting her on


your team. That means getting her to feel like the two of you
can retreat in your own private universe of inside jokes and
funny phrases, leaving the rest of the world behind.

This is starkly different from the humor in some of the other phas-
es. Earlier in an interaction, when youre teasing and bantering
with her, a lot of the tension comes from a you versus her dy-
namic. You might joke that you and her will never get along, and
often that gets girls giggling and flirting.

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Later though, you NEED to shift gears and make it about you
AND her together (the next section, on Partners in Crime,
hammers this idea in, as well). Its really important to drop the
cockiness about yourself and instead get cocky about you AND
her together.

For example, one the easiest ways Ive found to do this is by


saying to a girl, If we had a lovechild, it would be ridiculous-
ly good looking. Seriously, itd be like a little Zoolander! No-
tice how I dont come out and say, Hey Im so good looking
nor do I say, Youre so beautiful. Instead, I combine BOTH
statements, which makes it a US, and then I brag on OUR
imagined future lovechild. Even though that example is brief,
it really encapsulates everything you need to do when estab-
lishing an us vibe.

Now an us vibe is powerful in itself, but if you REALLY want


to supercharge the effectiveness of it and amp up the vibe, you
can riff on the us-statement you made using role playing.

So, as an example, if you told a woman youd have a ridicu-


lously good-looking Zoolander baby together, you could take
it a step further by saying, Yeah, itd be soooo good looking,
wed need to think of a super good looking name! Like if was a
little boy, we couldnt just name it something boring like John
or Danwed have to give him a ridiculously good-looking
name likehmmm.what do you think is a ridiculously good-
looking name?

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When she answers, you can keep reminding her of your super
good-looking baby by name. Every time you do, shell be re-
minded of the bond you two have.

You can also use the situation to generate role plays on the
fly. And the formula is super simple:

Us-Vibe + What You Want to Do + Details or


Activites Related to What You Want to Do

So, imagine you and girl were chatting for a while, and you
wanted to go for a kissa way you might use a humorous role
play to do that would be:
Wow, youre awesome. In fact, youre so awesome, I
wish you were my first girlfriend so the bar high would
have been set high for all my future girlfriends. Like, I
wish we could just get in a time machine, go back to
the year 1986 where wed both be three-years-old and
then you could be the first girl Id ever ask on a date.
And our date would be so badass. Id pick you up on my
Big Wheels and Id ride you to the playground. Id totally
push you on the swing and then later, under the seesaw,
wed have our first kiss. Itd be so amazing, itd just be

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like (and then you lean in for the kiss!)

This role play may sound elaborate, and you might be thinking
that youd never be able to generate such role plays on the
flybut its easier than it seems. All you need to do is think
about specifics. The first time I ever said that role play (and it
was all improvised on the spot), I just started thinking about
things I did when I was kid. So I thought:
Big Wheels
G.I. Joes
The Playground

And then once those details popped into my head, I drilled


down to more specifics:
What is there to do on the playground?
If I were on a date on the playground, where would
we have our first kiss?

You can think out loud as you come up with these details. In
fact, thats part of the fun (and humor!) of role playing. Its even
better when she chimes in and adds her details and thoughts
because that reinforces the us vibe!

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The Searing-Hot Partners in


Crime Technique

I
discovered the Partners in Crime technique about ten
years ago when I was working in a restaurant. There was this
guy, Marty, who wasnt particularly cool or funny, but he had
women wrapped around his finger. The minute he showed
up for work, they would rush up to talk to him. He was al-
ways sleeping with a couple of them and I wanted to know what
he was doing.

So instead of being bitter and jealous, I decided, Why dont I


become friends with this guy and really just learn from him? So
as I got to know Marty, what I found was that the guy was quite
addicting to be around.

In fact, he went on vacation this one time for a week, and while
he was gone, work just wasnt the same, and I realized that I
was missing Marty and so were all these other girls I was work-
ing with. I thought about it and I was like, If I didnt show up for
work one day, would the girls miss me?

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Phase 3

And the answer, sadly, was no, they wouldnt.

So what was Marty doing?

What kind of attitude did he have that created this sort of ad-
dictiveness and loyalty by all these girls?

What I found was that Marty created this vibe of you and me
against the world and thats sort of the vibe you want to keep
in mind:

Vibe = You + Me / Against the World

What Marty would do was, he would be playing secret pranks


on co-workers and have inside jokes about certain custom-
ers that would come in. When the customers showed up, he
would come over and catch her eye and make the face, point-
ing at the joke.

He always would be goofing around and it would always be


the both of us getting yelled at by the boss, only later to talk

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Phase 3

crap about the boss later on together.

He just created this you and him against the world vibe and
thats one of the best ways to establish rapport through hu-
mor: make the inside jokes you guys share about you and
her against the world.

Inside jokes and secret handshakes are great at cultivating


this vibe (I highly recommend inventing or stealing a good se-
cret handshake). Have you ever met someone that had a re-
ally great one? Learn it and then repeat it like its yours.

Or if you cant figure on out yourself, you can Google around


and youll find one. Also, watch the show The Office, not the
recent ones, go back and rent season 2 and season 3 and watch
how Jim and Pam interact with each other. This is probably the
best demonstration youll ever find for this partners in crime
technique of playing pranks together against people, while
creating that inside joke between the two of you.

Another concept and technique that I like to do is to create


a mission. Say youre waiting for something that you and the
girl kind of connect on, you can use it to create a sort of secret
mission, like, This is going to be our mission. We are going to
steal shots.

Maybe youre at a bar and you make a mission that the two of
you are going to steal shots and you make her the lookout, so

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Phase 3

now you are sort of combining against the bar, as the two of
you try not getting caught by the bartender or bouncer.

You are together in this mission.

The mission could also be just some imaginary role play. For
instance, say the two of you are talking about Cavaricis. If
you grew up in the 80s, you know what Cavaricis are. Maybe
the two of you are talking about Cavaricis and how much you
used to like them. You can make it your mission and say, Lets
make it our mission to bring Cavaricis back, and you can sort
of role play out this idea of the two of you together making
this certain brand of clothing cool again, or this certain hair-
style. Whatever it is, you are looking to find something to be
your mission.

Another way to use the partners in crime technique is to


find a common enemy. For example, a drunk guy thats both-
ering a girl at the bar. While shes talking to him, you can give
her like the help me eyes. Even back in college, my buddies
and I, we used to have this thing called help me brother. If we
were getting stuck in a corner talking to a girl we didnt want
to be talking to, we would like cross our arms to give the help
me brother sign, and it meant that the guy had to come and
save you.

If you teach a woman that, saying something like, Hey this is


the help me brother sign, and you have her do it, now when

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Phase 3

shes talking to a guy, you give her the help me brother or if


youre talking to a girl you can give her the help me brother
sign, and now it just creates that familiarity with each other.

Creating a common enemy could be something as simple as


bashing a TV show that you hate. Maybe you both hate the
Jersey Shore or going to the DMVyou can just talk shit about
it. A question I like to ask a girl to is, Who is your nemesis?
and it always gets the girl talking about her archrival. Now you
two can plan a scheme to get back at her nemesis.

For me, one of the things I hate is people who use finger quotes
or people who say things like LOL or BRB, they talk in text talk.
Those sort of things, I love when I talk to a girl and we both can
like rant about it. Thats another way to do the partners in crime
technique: find something the two of you can rant about.

You can also create the partners in crime vibe by using other
people as props. It could just be an unsuspecting person, may-
be theres a guy whose got a mullet standing by and the two
of you are singing 80s songs to see if you can get his atten-
tion.

When I used to work at that restaurant, one of the things that


I did once was there was a fishbowl with business cards in it
and the idea was that you would pull out a business card and
whoevers card you pulled out, wins a free lunch. So what me
and one of the girls did one day is I got her to take turns just

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calling every single customer up and telling them that they


won the free lunch so now our work the next day had like 20
people coming to claim the free lunch and her and I the whole
time were just cracking up together, like just dying, and it just
created a really good vibe between us.

Another example was this one time when I was at a bar and
my crazy ex-girlfriend showed up. The girl I was talking to at
the time, I made it her job to hide me from my crazy ex. Just
fun things like that create that partners in crime mentality.

Now if you still dont fully understand the Partners in Crime


technique, like I said, go back and watch season 2 and season
3 of The Office (the American version for you people over liv-
ing in England) and youll get a real good idea by watching
how Jim and Pam interact about how to create the partners
in crime vibe.

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Phase 3

Pop Culture Makes Humorous Rap-


port so Easy a Caveman Could Do It

W
hats so great about pop culture is that it con-
nects all of us and gives us cast of characters
we all know, moments we all remember, and
jokes (most of us) find funny. If you cant see
how this can generate instant rapport with a
stranger, youre just not thinking hard enough!

In fact, pop culture might the fastest, safest, and EASIEST way
to establish rapport with a girl you just met

or a girl youve been on a few dates with

or even your longtime girlfriend!

With pop culture, you can draw from a wide range of topics both
you and a woman understand!

This is SO MUCH better than trying to force rapport by using

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interview-style questions like:

Where are you from? What do you do? What did you
study in college?

ZzzzzZZZ Boring!

Instead, get in the habit of sprinkling pop culture references


into your interactions with women and youll see a BIG differ-
ence in response!

As we discussed in Phase One, pop culture is great for breaking


her state but it works EVEN better during rapport! Women
usually feel strong emotions for their favorite celebrities, mov-
ies, songs, etc. While they wont feel awkward talking about
these topics, they WILL feel emotions. That combination of
emotions without risk is crucial for establishing effective rap-
port!

Though, be careful: make sure youre establishing rapport


over topics you BOTH understand. For example, many women
do not know sports very well. So, while men often establish
rapport with other men by discussing sports, women are not
usually familiar with athletes or sports facts.

Its much better to discuss things like television, movies, and


music with women. For instance, if you lived in the United
States and grew up in the 80s, then you probably remember

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Phase 3

shows like Saved by the Bell, Full House, Family Mat-


ters, and Fresh Prince of Bel Air.

Regardless of gender, almost ANYONE in the U.S. who grew


up in that generation understands these shows. So if Im es-
tablishing rapport with a girl around my age, I know bringing
up one of those shows will probably get her emotionally ex-
cited.

Its important to size up a situation fast, and then adjust ac-


cordingly. People often know characters and personalities
from pop culture better than some of their acquaintances.
That gives you an unlimited number of ways to connect with
strangers as simply as if you were discussing old friends.

And this concept works throughout the interaction. At any


point, you can make a comparison to pop culture to get a
laugh, make a point, or just do it because you feel like it.

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Part 3: Rapport Through Humor

The
Us-Vibe >We would spawn the most insanely
good looking offsping together!
>Were both smart people so...
>You like me, so obviously you
have good taste in men!

Tips 1. When youre making a comment about


you and her together, its perfectly
okay to be a little cocky!
2. sometimes the more over-the-top and
arrogant your comment is, the more
funny it will be

Part me
ri
ners-in-c >If any creepy girls hit on me to-
night, you have to protect me!
>Lets make Cavaricis cool again!
>Okay, youre in. I can show you the
secret handshake...

Tips 1. If she feels like the two of you are


on the same team, you did it right
2. she wants to feel like shes in on
something or that you and her have
a connection the rest of the world
doesnt understand!

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Module 2

Part 3: Rapport through humor

Introduction: Why you bond with her?


To humanize yourself
Youre not just a random guy
Youve experienced similar things as her
Youre like her (weapon of influence)
Its harder to reject a guy who she sees as a human
You want her to see you as a real person and not just
some random guy shes attracted to 3-dimensionalize
yourself

Youre sharing experiences and giving her a


chance to connect with you
The more she shares back, the more invested she be-
comes

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Phase 3

Her ego gets tied to your approval


Sharing feels good (especially for introverted girls)

Youre letting her relax a bit and let her guard


down
During the previous phase she knew you were flirting so
her guard was higher
Relaxing relieves stress and feels good
Being comfortable with someone feels god
Unmakingtaking off the social mask

Characteristics: What are the elements of the


third phase
This is a milder form of humor more designed to con-
nect with her
Where previously you were laughing at her now
youre laughing with her

Youre trying to use humor to bring in shared


experiences you can connect over
Childhood memories
An embarrassing story
Observations and commentary on surroundings

Remember to mix some teasing in but...


Youre also trying to get her to open and feel comfort-

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Phase 3

able around you


Its working when she tells you a funny story about her
childhood or displays some vulnerability to you

Dont be afraid to let a little bit of your dorky


side out
Display cool vulnerability
Youre essentially giving her permission to do the same
Telling her how you got caught singing along to a Ma-
donna song in your car
How your eight year old cousin beat you in a arm wres-
tling match..
How you were showing off and then faced an embar-
rassing consequence

Examples: What are some examples of Phase 3


Humor
Pop culture references
Observations about your surroundings
Nemesiss
Creating imaginary missions
Funny stories of your past (my sleep away camp inci-
dents)

Mistakes to Avoid: What are some mistakes they


can avoid in phase 3

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Phase 3

Too much rapport


Not moving things towards sexuality once rapport has
been established

Thinking on the Fly: How to create phase 3 hu-


mor
Facebooks 10 second interview application practice
answering questions
Mind map ideas

128
Phase 4:
Take Her Back to
the Playground
Get her to revert back to a school girl, laughing on the
playground with her crush; shes not thinking about work,
responsibilities, or repercussions of hooking up...

T
he expression take her to the playground sums up
a specific style of humor you will find very effective in
making women hornyespecially in the later stages
of a seduction. Ideally, you want to get her to feel as
if shes back on the playground with you, like two kids
in the fourth grade, teasing each other and just having fun.

While it may sound strange or even childish, when you take her
back to the playground you give her the opportunity to let her
guard down so she can really enjoy herself. In fact, this phase
comes AFTER rapport because a woman has to feel comfortable
around you BEFORE she can let herself go with playground hu-
mor.

Not only is this style of humor is incredibly effectively in stoking


a womans attraction and priming her for the firth and final

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Phase 4

humor phase (sexualized humor), but it also works great with


girlfriends or girls youre dating.

One of the reasons playground humor works so well is because


it has so much attractive subtext. Youre going to see this first-
hand when you playfully bully a girl or you bond with her as
the two of you complete a game or mission. By letting her get
in touch with the childlike side of her personality (note: we
did NOT say the childish side) shell have an experience that
so few other guys have ever given her.

This is where you get her to revert back to a school girl, laugh-
ing on the playground with the guy she has a crush on. Shes
not thinking about work, responsibilities, or repercussions of
hooking up with you.

While you need to be cautious with playground humor, since


it can be misinterpreted as immature if misapplied, once a
woman feels some rapport with you its an appropriate time
to sprinkle in a healthy dose of playground humor. Youll see
how quickly a woman warms up to this style of humor as well
as how comfortable it will get her, particularly with her sexual
feelings.

130
Phase 4

Using Playful Bullying to


Turn Up the Sexual Tension

W
hile no one likes a bully, stealing a few bully
moves and applying them in a good-natured
way will work wonders when taking her back
to her playground days.

As you probably know, childhood bullies are respected (usual-


ly through fear) and get their peers feeling tense and self-con-
scious. While it goes without saying that you DO NOT EVER want
a woman to feel fear around you, getting her momentarily on
her toes is a fantastic way to dial up sexual tension.

Thats why stealing a move or two from the bully handbook


is so effective. Again, to absolutely make sure this concept isnt
misapplied, we want you to notice how we SPECIFICALLY titled
this tactic PLAYFUL Bullying (with a big emphasis on the PLAY-
FUL!). If its not completely obvious that youre playfully bullying
her in good fun, you can easily across off as a dickwhich is defi-
nitely NOT an impression you want to make on a woman youre

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Phase 4

attracted to! So always keep it more on the playful spectrum!

That said, youll see how well mixing in some playful bullying
works when youre trying to inject tension into your interac-
tions. Below were going to list and describe some easy ways
to flirt in a playfully bullying way. First though, lets define EX-
ACTLY what playful bullying entails so you understand the um-
brella under which all these tactics fall.

Acting as a playful bully means you do or say things that put


her on the spot and/or challenge her. If shes defending her-
self or working to overcome a lighthearted obstacle youve
created for her, thats a great start. Just make sure shes smil-
ing or laughing the whole time. Obviously you never want to
take this too far so that shes angry, frustrated, scared, or ac-
tively struggling against you.

Thats why playful bullying is best applied after youve estab-


lished a flirty vibe with lots of back-and-forth teasing. You also
want to be sure you have plenty of time to get her sexually
aroused. One of the worst times to try this style of humor is
when a woman is either about to leave or (worse) trying to
leave. Using playful bullying in an attempt to keep a woman
talking to you or stop her from leaving will not only backfire
and make her want to get as far from you as possible, but its
also not playful at all. At that point, its actual bullying.

(Sometimes it may seem like we go to great lengths to de-

132
Phase 4

scribe what NOT to do, and it probably seems stupidly obvi-


ous. Yet, we feel obligated to make it crystal clear how these
concepts can be misapplied. Ive personally seen a number of
guys try and bully girls into continuing conversations with
them...)

Now that you understand the RIGHT way to apply this tech-
nique, lets move into some specifics. To begin, theres an old
expression that states, If it was fun when you were in a kid,
its fun today. That means things that were exciting and en-
joyable as a kid are fun when you bring them back. Some in-
stant ways to do this are:
Grab her hand and challenge her to a thumb-wrestling
match
Challenge her to a pillow fight
Challenge her to a few rounds of truth-or-dare
Try to teach her a secret handshake and joke about
how bad she is at it
After a high-five, tell her she needs to work on her
high-fiving skills

If you try the examples above and a woman laughs or smiles


but hesitates to comply, thats a great opportunity to apply
some light-hearted peer pressure. I like telling her that all
the cool kids are doing it and unless she wants to eat lunch
by herself, she should get involved with whatever youre sug-
gesting.

133
Phase 4

Another way to playfully bully her is by telling her what shes


going to get. The best application Ive ever seen of this tech-
nique actually came from a married friend of mine. My buddys
wife said she was hoping Santa was going to bring her a Tif-
fanys bracelet for Christmas and, without missing a beat, my
buddy replied, Nah. Already spoke with Santa. Youre getting
coal. It was great.

An easy way you can do this is if youre out at a bar or on a


date, ask a woman what she wants (e.g., a drink) and then
say, Nah, youre getting (something really bad) instead. In
the drink example, if a girl said she wanted an Appletini, Id
probably say, Nah youre getting a glass of cheap Scotch in
a dirty glass. (Of course, you order her whatever she really
wants. Youre only playfully pretending shes getting some-
thing gross.)

Moving on, a classic playful bullying move is to block her


path when shes trying to go to walk somewhere. All you need
to do is get in her way, like when she says shes got to go to
the bathroom or get a drink.

Another great move is to jokingly instigate a fight between


her and someone else, like maybe you say, Oh wow, this girl
was just talking some serious smack. Always be sure to do
it in a joking way so everybody knows its all in good fun. The
point is simply to get some fun drama going between her and
one of her friends or someone she knows.

134
Phase 4

If youre out at a bar, a funny move is to take her hand and


touch a guys butt. For me, I usually do this when Im comfort-
able with a girl and notice a guy standing in a crowded part
of the bar, preferably a weird old man because that always
makes it funnier (if its just a normal guy, its not that great).

All you have to do is take her hand and put it on the old guys
butt so that he turns around. It will drive most women crazy.
Just the other night I pulled this move and the girl said, I hate
youand thats exactly why I knew it worked. (A girl only
says, I hate you to a guy shes attracted to)

Finally, some old-fashioned teasing works great in this phase.


Telling her that the way shes standing makes her look like the
dorky wallflower in the corner. And if you spot an awkward
guy who looks out of place, you can add something about
how thats she has a crush on. This sort of teasing lends itself
well to repetition because you can bring it up throughout the
night. Just keep pointing out the guy and say, You should just
go over and talk to him. Ill introduce you if youre too nervous
to do it yourself

Hopefully these tactics give you a good overview of how play-


ful bullying works!

135
Phase 4

Play Games to Mix Play-


ground Humor with Rapport

G
ames not only are great for creating humorous mo-
ments with women, but they also really get women
feeling like you think theyre special. Before a wom-
an will sleep with you, she HAS to feel like you genu-
inely like her. Unfortunately, most guys dont know
how to do this. Making a woman feel special DOES NOT mean
acting like a wimp or kissing her ass. In fact, its actually better if
you DONT do that. Keep things subtle instead. Give her a feeling
of us-nessthat you and her together make a unique couple.
(Remember the us-vibe!)

A very fast and highly effective way to do that is to create games


and conspiracies that only the two of you understand. Similar
to an inside joke, the conspiracies you create should be things
only the two of you are in on. If she feels she shares a set of
secrets with youeven if those secrets are completely trivial
then shell feel as if youve let her into a part of your world re-
served only for her.

136
Phase 4

Thats the essence of making a girl feel special.

The games youll use to create these conspiracies may seem


superficial and pointless (as they should). Remember: youve
probably only known her for short period of time. Playing
games with her isnt about getting deep with your feelings
its just about generating more rapport. And to create the feel-
ing you want, its better to keep things light and playful.

The best conspiracies are created using:

The situationgames about whats going on around


you at the time
The people watchingplaying games that involve oth-
er people
Your togethernessgames involving the two of you
together

Though, trying too hard to shoe-horn a game or a conspiracy


in an interaction often comes off as weird and try-hard. Remem-
ber, playground humor only should happen during Phase 4.

On the next page youll find 3 simple games you can use to
create conspiracies. Just to make the point of playing games
clear, allow me to explain with a story. One night, Id just met
a girl who was fun and outgoing. We started teasing one an-
other about who was more awesome. To settle our dis-
pute I suggested a challenge. I said, Im so awesome, I

137
Phase 4

can get a high-five without even asking for one or putting my


hand up. You cant do that. She laughed and dared me to try.
So I tapped some guy on the shoulder and said, You voted
for Obama, right!? The guy smiled and said, I did! and put
his hand up for a high-five.

My girl thought this was hilarious, so she tapped some girl on


the shoulder and said, Hey, do you remember Spring Break
2007? The girl just gave my girl a blank stare and then turned
away. We both got a good laugh over it. For the rest of the
night, we named those 2 people Obama Guy and The Girl
Who Hates Fun. We even tried to introduce them at one point!

The conspiracy we shared made our night interesting and


created a fun activity that connected us and brought us closer.
The point of creating a conspiracy isnt the actual gameits
the emotions that are embedded into the game. Sharing those
emotions together will bond you and a woman very fast. Here
are some games to try:

138
Phase 4

Yet, games dont even have to this complicated. You can just
play hot hands or truth-or-dare (as mentioned in the last sec-
tion). Another great game is mouse race, where you play the
three mice running and you draw on her arm and she tells you
to stop and you dont stop because one of the mice is deaf. It
gets her really mad and creates a playful vibe.

An old classic game to play is Fuck, Marry, Kill. Its simple:


just ask her to point out guys that shed fuck, marry, and kill.
Once she finishes, you do the same with girls. This is a great

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Phase 4

game to play in bars because you can just point out strangers.
And it works even better when you play at a party where the
answers are more of a secret.

Before playing Fuck, Marry, Kill though, be sure to say, Ex-


cluding us, of course so it doesnt seem like you just asked
her to get her to admit shed fuck or marry you. Likewise, you
dont have to say youd fuck or marry her. (You can playfully
say that youd kill herbut do it in a playful way, like, Id
pick you to killbecause I cant make up my mind if I want to
fuck you or marry you and its driving me crazy!)

Point is this: staring contests, rocks-paper-scissor, thumb wres-


tlingits all good. Fake palm reading is another fun example.
If youre going to palm read and do it in a serious way, its kind
of lame. But if you take it and make it fun by turning it into a
joke, it becomes a playful game. As long as you keep it fun,
shell enjoy it!

140
Phase 4

Callback Humor Amplifies the


Playground Effect

A
nother aspect of playground humor that really works
well is the idea of repetition. Kids do this when they
are little, constantly repeating things over and over
again. Well, you can continue to repeat some things,
like a silly rumor or a false accusation, in order to
add that playground playfulness to your conversations.

Heres an example of something that I did recently. I was talk-


ing to a girl about how many people we had slept with. She told
me that she had slept with four. I was like, I know that this is
Cosmo math and you have to double whatever a girl says, so if a
girl says four it really means eight.

So for the rest of the time that I knew this girl, I would always
go back to that little joke by saying things like, So who was the
eighth guy? and I would name them and try to guess who num-
ber eight was. It was just a funny thing that I always went back
to: that she slept with eight guys even though she swears she

141
Phase 4

slept with four.

Or say youre talking to a girl and she moves the chair and it
squeaks and sounds like a fart, but you both know it was just
the chair. You can say, Did you just fart in front of me? Are
we that comfortable with each other where we can just fart
in front of each other? Most of the time, shell be like, Oh
no, and you can keep going back to it and repeating the ac-
cusation.

Maybe later on, somebody else comes into the group, you go,
Hey. This is Jessica. She may or may not have just farted in
front of me, so you might want to stay away from her. Youre
just bringing back the joke and repeating it for extra effect.

You can even use callback for the sort of silly humor that was
funny ON the (actualt) playground. Perfect example of that
silly sort of humor: the old Youve got something on your
shirt gag.

This is something weve been doing since we were 5 years old


and it never gets old. Never. You point at a girls shirt and you
go, Youve got something on your shirt, and then she looks
down. The minute that you do that, youre taking it to the play-
ground and shes thinking, Okay. Hes that kind of guy. Its
going to be that kind of interaction with him. If used at the
right times, and not too much, this works great in this phase
of humor.

142
Phase 4

Dumbing Your Humor Down to


the Playground Level

L
owbrow humor is the dumber side of playground hu-
mor, which has you sort of playing the dumb guy. Ex-
amples of this are doing things like stating the obvious.
If you see a girl crying in the corner, youd say, Do you
think shes sad? Youre just basically saying something
thats stupid funny. Another example might be if a girl is really
short and you say, Youre kind of short. Youre just stating the
obvious, which, if done in moderation, is funny.

Absurdity is also works great for lowbrow humor. An example of


absurdity applied to playground humor might be massively ex-
aggerating a number. If a girl asks you how many girls you have
slept with you can say, 6,493. Or was it 6,394? I dont know if I
should count her...

You can also describe things in absurd ways. For example, de-
scribing animals talking or people doing bizarre things. For ex-
ample, say youre talking about your dog, you might describe

143
Phase 4

him like this: Yeah my dog is the best. Hes got a thing for dry
humping, especially dry humping pillows. He even has three-
somes. Hell take two pillows and go back and forth with them.
Then he smokes a cigar afterwards. Hes crazy.

Another way to apply lowbrow humor is playing the stupid


guy. For example, you can use the wrong usage of words to
add in that lowbrow silliness, like, Hes the very pineapple of
politeness, instead of pinnacle. Just say things that are bla-
tantly wrong to mess with her a little. To really get a feel for
this style of humor, watch Ali G. Thats the perfect example of
stupid funny.

Dont overdo it, though. Everything suggested in this section


should only be used sparingly, and in a balanced way. Yet dont
hold yourself back from trying some of these ideas if you find
them amusing or they resonate with your personality/humor.
Its all about creating a fun sort of vibe with women.

Most guys shy away from playground humor because they


want to seem cool. Yet, you already know, trying too hard
to be cool makes you come off cold and boring. I had that
problem for a really long time, partly because I was scared to
ever take things back to the playground. It may be counter-
intuitive when you take it to the playground and showing this
lowbrow side of yourself, but it actually can be really attrac-
tive when you get comfortable with it.

144
Phase 4

For starters, it gets girls to realize, Wow, this guy isnt trying
to impress me. While most guys scramble to impress at-
tractive women, shell see that your confidence and trust in
yourself allows you to just be yourself, even if sometimes
you come across dorky.

Not only that, when you act a little dorky it lets her see that
dorky side of herselfand you want to let out that side of her.
I know it might sound counter-intuitive that you want her to
show you her dorky side, but when you have a girlfriend or are
in any type of relationship, a lot of it IS her dorky side. When
youre lying in bed with a girl in the morning, a lot of the hu-
mor you and your girlfriend have is just being dorky to each
other

So when you allow a girl to act that way before shes your girl-
friend, it usually relaxes her and makes her almost feel like the
two of you are already together. Were all dorks at heart, but
we only let people close to us see that dorky side of our per-
sonalities.

Thats why when you mess up you advise you NOT to cover it
up. (In fact, make a joke about it!) Whether you mess up trying
to hit on her or you spill something on your shirt, dont try to
play off like some sort of wanna-be cool guy. Go with it and let
it reveal that dorky side of you and trust it will make you come
off MORE attractive.

145
Part 4: Playground Humor

p l ay n g
ful bullyi >I ordered you the worst glass
of scotch they had instead. hope
you like it!
>not so fast!

Tips 1. Playfully bullying her is all about


teasing her almost like an older
brother...
2. Much of it boils down to this: No matter
what she says, when youre being the
playful bully, do the exact opposite!

game
s with her >Thats it! Im challenging you to a
thumb wrestling match! Lets go!
>Ill bet I can get that guy to
high-five me before you can...

Tips 1. Dont overthink games. As long as


theyre simple and fun, shell enjoy it!
2. It doesnt matter if you win or lose
the game, really all shes going to
remember is how she felt while play-
ing with you!

146
Module 2

Part 4: taking Her back to the playground

Phase 4 should begin roughly 30-35 minutes into an interaction.


At this point youve already interrupted her pattern and estab-
lished yourself as a flirt. And youve also 3-dimensionalized your-
self by creating rapport and connection. Now its time to create
fun, relaxed vibe that allows her to start feeling sexual around
you.

Introduction: Get her having fun, feeling relaxed, and take


her back to the playground

What is The Playground


This is where you get her to revert back to a school girl,
laughing on the playground with the guy she has a crush
on

147
Phase 4

Shes not thinking about work, responsibilities, or reper-


cussions of hooking up with you

Goals of this phase...


Get her into that mental playground state
Youre loosening her up for the kiss
Youre disengaging her logical brain
You begin using humor to move things physical (excus-
es to touch her)

Characteristics: What are the elements of the


fourth phase
This is a sillier form of humor to get her lubricated for
physicality (think- youve got something on your shirt)
Youre trying to take her away from everything else in
her life and get the giant spotlight focused on the two
of you
Youre going to use repetition and call back humor to
create the feeling like shes known you longer than she
has
So if earlier you had joked she was bossy and she says
something vaguely bossy there it is again
You must mix this is, along with normal conversation
as you dont want to go overboard and eliminate the
sexual tension.

148
Phase 4

Examples: What are some examples of Phase 4


Humor
Childish jokes
Games (thumb wrestling, hot hands, staring contests,
dares)
Playful bullying
Absurdity
Low brow
Partners in crime
Imitating her
Fuck with her

Mistakes to Avoid: What are some mistakes they


can avoid in phase 4
Too much rapport
Not getting using the playground as a chance to get
physical
Going overboard and coming off as a clown or too im-
mature to

Thinking on the Fly: How to create phase 3 hu-


mor
Go watch the first two seasons of The Office and take
note of the way Jim and Pam act together

149
Phase 5:
Sexualized
Humor
Great for staying out of the friend zone
and making an interaction very
sexual, very fast...

I
f youve ever tried to get sexual with woman and ended up
just coming off like a creepy pervert, this section will make
sure that never happens again. Using humor to smooth
things over is a great strategy for seamless sexual escalation.

I only learned this lesson through trial and error (and many
creeped out ladies!). Time and time again I saw the combina-
tion for sexy, non-awkward physical escalation was this:

Sexual intentions clear + Humor + Make a move = Sexy


times

Its very easy to bring up sex with a girl when shes giggling. If
youre having a serious conversation about that uncle you hated
growing up or about one of her ex-boyfriends who cheated, its
usually hard to bring up sex. But when youre laughing back-and-

150
Phase 5

forth, shes giggling and youre just having this playful conver-
sation, its very easy to bring up sex. Its also makes going back
to your place easy, too, because its all under the guise of fun.

If youve been having fun with her all night, its a lot easier to
keep that momentum going and get her back because shes
just going to be like, Okay. Were just going to go back and
have some more fun. It doesnt trigger that alarm in her head
that tells her, Oh no! If I go back to his place, hes going to
put the moves on me, and I dont want to seem slutty.

Dont get me wrong, when shes having fun she still KNOWS
whats going on and what the deal is, but she allows it to hap-
pen because it doesnt seem weird, creepy, forced, and, most
importantly, youre doing it the right way.

So how do you know if youre doing it right? How do you know


that this fun that youre creating is working? One sign is if she
says something like, I hate you. I hate you is one of the best
lines in the world! If she says, I hate you, youre such a jerk,
with a smile or a laugh, youre doing it right. (As mentioned in
the last phase during playful bullying.)

If she jokingly hits you, whether its lightly slapping you or just
grabbing at you, thats another indication youre doing it right.

If she starts playfully making fun of you, youre doing it right.


However, when a girl starts playfully making fun of you, thats

151
Phase 5

not the best situation. When this happens, you usually should
have a comeback. Even something as simple as saying, You
keep that up, little girl, and youre going to get spanked.

And, as mentioned a few times throughout this book, you


know youre doing it right when you become teammates,
when youre the one she wants to tell things to. When youre
in a group of girls or a group of people and shes whispering
little jokes to you. Thats what doing it right looks like. When
something funny happens and she looks at you, wanting to
make eye contact, youre golden...

At this point though, youve got to begin moving towards se-


duction. Once you see one or more of these signals (or just get
the sense shes into you) you really should shift your humor to
the fifth and final phase: sexualized humor.

Now that weve discussed why this works and what your goals
should be, lets talk about what sexualized humor actually
is...

152
Phase 5

The Perfect Combo: Sexual


Statements Mixed with Humor

A
s guys, sometimes its hard for us to understand why
a woman wouldnt want to have sex with us if she
likes us. Thats because when were attracted to a
girl, wed have sex with herno questions asked.
In fact, theres really only 3 ways of categorizing
women: the 0, 1, and 2 system.

0 = Would not
1 = Would
2 = Wouldand would snap pictures

In other words, theres girl you wouldnt sleep with (0), girls you
would sleep with (1), and girls youd sleep withand be proud
of it (2). Thats all, folks! With women, however, its much more
complex and confusing. As you probably know, just because a
woman likes you doesnt mean shes ready to sleep with you. You
could be a 2 to a womana guy shed sleep with and show off
to her friendsyet she still may hesitate to go home with you.

153
Phase 5

To keep things simple, women will usually only sleep with a


guy if these 3 criteria are met:

1. She feels attraction for a guy


2. She feels comfortable around that guy
3. She feels sexually aroused

Often, criterion number 3getting her to feel sexually


arousedis the hardest part (which is why sexualized humor
works so well!). If youve ever lost a girl at the last minute
right before you were going to have sex with heryou prob-
ably ruined the interaction because you failed to get her sexu-
ally aroused before making your big move.

Most guys assume its up to the girl to get herself feeling sex-
ual. If you dont think youre one of these guys, ask yourself
this: what did you do with the last girl you hung out with that
got her feeling sexual?

Unless a guy a cognizant of criterion number 3, the idea usu-


ally doesnt even cross his mind. But now that YOU know, its
just a matter of executing a few simple strategies to raise the
sexual thermostat in the interaction. The tactics and strate-
gies of phase 5 humor is intended to do just that.

An excellent way to do this is by humorous restraint. All you


need to do is say something sexual but then immediately say
something humorous, before a woman even has a chance to

154
Phase 5

react to the sexual statement. This is a great way to amp up


the sexual tension because shes processing the sexual state-
ments while laughing at the humorous follow-ups. Its like a
one-two arousal punch!

This is the style of humor youll see a lot of in phase 5. Sex-


ual humor works best when it plants sexual ideas in her head
while shes laughing. Remember the formula mentioned be-
fore: Sexual intent + Humor = Arousal.

So, to reiterate, humorous restraint means you state your


sexual intent, but before anything gets awkward (or she can
even object to it) you quickly use humor to take the edge off
your statement.

As a quick example, if youre at a bar with her, you might say,


Id love to be running my fingers up your leg right now, but
Im going to behave myself because I dont think the general
public would appreciate the awesomeness of that. She may
not feel comfortable with you running your fingers up her leg
(yet), but by adding humor you keep it lighthearted and play-
ful...not serious and creepy! This leaves her free to enjoy that
fantasy without guilt, which usually gets her aroused.

The two most important components of humorous restraint


are: 1. Timing 2. Details. As youre probably well aware, the
right TIME to sexualize a conversation is when you and a
woman feel comfortable around one another and have a flirty

155
Phase 5

vibe going. (Unless you REALLY know what youre doing, us-
ing phase 5 strategies too early or too late will usually creep
her out.)

Although, if said at the right time, you can use sexualized hu-
mor on a girl you just met as well as your long-term girlfriend.
Just always stay creative with the details, which is the second
component of a successfully sexualizing your humor.

The details are where you can really amplify the humor, es-
pecially when applying humorous restraint. The more spe-
cific you are with explicit details, the more you can turn her
on. For example, notice how non-specific (and unfunny) this
statement is: Id really like to be fucking you right now, but
we cant because were in public.

A better way to say the exact same thing would be: I cant
stop thinking about how itd feel to be laying on my bed, you
on top of me, with my hand gently running down your back...
but Im going to try to stop thinking such things because there
are old ladies presentso I dont want to give myself a rag-
ing boner and offend someones granny. The details make
the statements more real, so they pack more of an emotional
punch as well as add more humor.

156
Phase 5

Sexual Priming: The Rejection-


Proof Way to Get In Her Pants

S
exual priming is one of my FAVORITE tactics for getting
sexual. To understand how it works, imagine this: you
and a woman have been chatting for 30 minutes or so
and everything seems to be going well. Shes giggling
at your jokes, answering your questions with stories,
staring into your eyes, and maybe even peppering you with a
compliment here and there.

BUT you still havent gotten physical with her

At this point, it REALLY HELPS if you first prepare a woman for


a physical advance by stating your sexual intentions in a humor-
ous way (per the formula). We call tactic this sexual priming
because it lets you gauge how willing and ready she is for you
to make your move.

In fact, using sexual priming BEFORE getting physical makes it


almost IMPOSSIBLE for her to reject you when you go for a kiss,

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Phase 5

invite her back to your place, and even when you guys start
fooling around!

Things just FLOW

Its the old it just happened effect!

Though, its not all sunshine and rainbowssay the WRONG


thing to her and its going to have the EXACT OPPOSITE effect.
Youre going to come off looking like a horny pervert, shes
going to reject you brutally, and things will instantly get awk-
ward, leaving you embarrassed and blue-balled...

So its VERY important you do this right! Lets look at some


common scenarios and compare the RIGHT way versus the
WRONG way to prime her for a sexual advance

You want to gauge if shes single/sexually open-minded:


Wrong way: Do you have a boyfriend? Because Id
love to get naughty with you.

Right way: Your boyfriend obviously doesnt spank


you enough. (Credit: Sinn)

You want to invite her back to your place and you want to
make it clear you have sexual intentions:
Wrong way: We could go back to my place where its
quieter and more intimate and I have condoms...

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Phase 5

Right way: Lets have a cuddle date back at my place.


Im calling dibs on being the big spoon!

You want to find out if shes ready for to be kissed:


Wrong way: Id really like to kiss you right now

Right way: Im sorry, Im really enjoying our conver-


sation but Im also a little distracted because I have
this sneaking suspicion that youre an amazing kisser
and our first kiss would be like something out of a Dis-
ney moviepure hot magicso, just silence my men-
tal chatter for me: am I right? Are you a good kisser?

You want to dance with her:


Wrong way: Wanna dance?

Right way: Let me see your best New Jersey dance


moves! You go first then Ill show you mine!

You want to determine if shes bi-curious or down for three-


somes:
Wrong way: So are you into girls?

Right way: So are you in agreement with Katy Perry?


I mean, have you ever kissed a girland like it? Ill tell
you my answer, but I want to hear yours first

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Phase 5

You can just go out tonight and use these sexual priming ex-
amples and see them work for yourself

but EVEN better: lets quickly breakdown why these exam-


ples work so you can make up YOUR OWN examples! (I think
Confucius once said something like, Give a man sexual prim-
ing examples, hell get a girl tonight. Teach a man sexual prim-
ing, hell get girls every night.)

First of all, one of the most IMPORTANT elements of keep-


ing things humorous when youre bringing up sex is WORD
CHOICE. The difference between being a fun, sexy guy versus
creepy, weird pervert can be as minor as A SINGLE WORD!

Notice in the examples above, the good sexual priming ex-


amples use words like SPANKING and CUDDLE rather than
naughty and intimate.

Shell know exactly what you mean if you say, Lets go cuddle
but they KEY DIFFERENCE is cuddle is a cute, good-humored
word. And especially adding things, Im calls dibs on the big
spoon keeps the proposition light and playful. Whereas us-
ing words like intimate and quiet make going back to your
place sound awkward and serious.

Secondly, notice how the good examples use playful adjec-


tives and phrases to release the tension of direct statements of
sexual intent. Saying a first kiss is going to be something out

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Phase 5

of a Disney movie and its going to be hot magic (notice:


not simply hot, not only magicbut HOT MAGIC) makes the
kiss sound fun rather than a formality. The same is true when
you ask to see her New Jersey dance moves (aside: Im not
sure Jersey dance moves even existbut its a great way to
get her giggling and out on the dance floor.)

Finally, using a third-person perspective (in the example above,


we go with pop culture, e.g., Katy Perry) to bring up sexual
topics is ALWAYS a great way to introduce a sexual vibe with-
out coming off as creepy. By asking, Have you ever kissed a
girland LIKED IT? you are asking her exactly what you want
to know (if shes into girls/down for threesomes) YET youre
doing it in a way thats not offensive or pressuring.

Any guy with any sort of experience with women knows if


you can get a girl laughing, youre playing the game on easy.
Thats why Marilyn Monroe famously said, If you can make
a woman laugh, you can make her do anything. Theres no
better time to apply this mantra than when youre making a
move and getting sexual.

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Part 5: Sexualized Humor

ni t
Humo ra
rous rest >If we were alone, Id be on my
naughtiest behavior...but since its al-
most Christmas and I want to be on
Santas nice list, Im going to be a
good boy...

Tips 1. humorous restraint depends on a


good twist...use the 2-step formula
to move things in a sexual direction
then add a twist of humor!

s e xu
al priming >You need a spanking!
>Why do I have a sneaking suspi-
cion that youre a great cuddler?
>Im not going to lie...Im pretty
damn excellent at spooning...

Tips 1. Sexual priming is all about using


code words for sexual escalation.
If you can bring up sex in a humorous
way, you win!
2. Dont take sexual priming too far and
become a clown. Just use it to test
the wasters and then make your move!

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Module 2

Part 5: sexualized humor


This type of humor can work during any phase of the interac-
tion, but is very effective to use if you think you developed too
much rapport at any point, or feel like you might be moving into
friend zone type flirting because this makes the interaction
sexual fast

Introduction: When and why to use sexualized


humor.
Gets her comfortable discussing sexual topics or
situations,or
Hints towards sexual relationship later on
Allows you to quickly bring up sexier topics (e.g., thongs,
vibrators, swingers, K Y jelly, S&M)

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Phase 5

Gets the topic of sex out in the open


Gets her imagination and mind moving toward the idea
of sex
Its like when you talk about your vacation to Argentina
and get her mind focused on vacations

Youre giving her permission to express sexual


side around you
Shes taken her cues from you
If you seem like a prude, shell act like a prude
Just like taking off your social mask allowed her to
open up a little more emotionally, by showing her your
comfortable with sex allows her to feel more comfort-
able with sex

You begin using humor to move things physical


Excuses to touch her
Creating sexual tension by alternating between this play-
ful state and normal conversation, while beginning to
acknowledge that the two of your are seriously flirting.
A great thing to do is after saying this sexual is to go
back to normal because you sort of let it hang there
and that increases tension

Youre acknowledging the elephant in the room


that youre trying to sleep with her

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Phase 5

This can be fun because it takes a lot of pressure off you


Escalates the flirtation and avoids fun boy vibe

Characteristics: What are the elements of the


fourth phase
This is a more sexualized style of humor
The delivery here is NOT in an immature sort of way you
might deliver lines in the Playground Phase
You must have rock solid confidence if youre gonna use
sexual humor
SHE WILL TEST YOU
The best response to her tests is to keep blaming it on
her, e.g., I knew you were one of those annoying good
girls

You must introduce or at least hint at this early


on or else you will shock her if you go into later
without warming her up
Being shy for 30 minutes and saying something sexual
will creep her out
Test her willingness to get sexual
You can throw out vaguely sexual stuff and see how she
responds

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Phase 5

Examples: What are some examples of Phase 5


Humor
Sexual challenges
Sexual teasing , e.g., I bet youre one of those girls who
throw her panties on the stage at concerts.
If she compliments you say, Im not that easy. Youre
going to have to at least buy me a drink before I go home
with you.
If you catch her accidentally make eye contact with a
guys butt or his crotch you could say, You are a naugh-
ty girl, arent you?
The Jon Sinn statement: Your last boyfriend obviously
didnt spank you enough.
Sexual jokes, e.g., Wow! You wear a ring on this finger?
You know what that says about you. Did you ever have
sex in an elevator?
Sexual comments, e.g., You need to let loose! When
was the last time you had an orgasm. I really think you
need to find a guy right now, and let him bend you over
the bathroom sink and let him have his way with you.
Playing a sexualized character (e.g., overconfident play-
boy, innocent guy shes trying to seduce, devil on her
shoulder)
Bait her into talking about sex by twisting something
she said and making it sexual, e.g., I bet your put a lot
of whipped cream in your hot chocolate

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Phase 5

Mistakes to Avoid: What are some mistakes to


avoid in phase 5
Too much sexuality, coming off creepy
Bringing up sex before attraction has been established
Not being obvious enough
Getting too sexual in front of other people

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