Shane Park 1

Shane Park
COMM 1080-400
Final Paper Standpoint Theory

Overview
When you consider what conflict includes, what words come to mind? That questions
was posed to our class early in this semester and every person came up to the whiteboard and
wrote at least one word they associated with conflict. The one word written most on the board,
and many other words in some way related, was anger. Often people think of conflict as a big
scary monster, one to be avoided at all cost, even if the cost is a relationship with someone
whom you hold dear to your heart. Understanding how to better manage conflict using
appropriate skills can give you the opportunity to save relationships that have great meaning in
your life from conflict-induced ruin. Through this paper we will consider standpoint theory, and
its relation to conflict management. First, I will explain what standpoint theory is, and how it
relates to conflict management. I will then explain a situation in my life when standpoint theory
assisted in a conflict that I have experienced.

Theory/Concept
Imagine that you are currently in the middle of an argument with your significant other (they
happen often enough, hopefully this wont be too difficult to picture). It doesnt necessarily matter what
the argument is about, just imagine something. The argument isnt really going anywhere positive and
your significant other says something like you just dont understand where Im coming from. It would be
good for you to walk a mile in my shoes! What your significant other is really saying is that they want
you to understand their standpoint, they want you to know why they see and do things the way they do.
From the course reading, Wood defines standpoint theory as The social, material, and symbolic
circumstances of a social group shape how members perceive, interpret, and act toward events,
situations, others, and themselves. Basically, our backgrounds and experience shape the way we
perceive everything around us, including communication and conflict in any relationship.
Standpoint theory is based on several considerations. First, social locationsincluding those
based on gender, race, class, and so forthshape peoples lives[and second] a person can develop
multiple standpoints shaped by membership in traditionally marginalized groups (Kinefuchi & Orbe,
2008). Communication as a whole could be greatly enhanced simply by understanding the conversation
from the standpoint of the other individual involved. In all forms of communication, but in conflict
especially, this theory has the ability to enhance and invigorate conversation and problem solving. We
could all use a little help understanding the people we interact with.

Analysis
I have a go to place when I need to draw personal experiences about communication, and that is
my marriage. Anyone who has been married knows that marriage is the ultimate test of communication
skills. My wife and I were both raised relatively close to each other, geographically speaking. When I was
eleven years old my family moved to West Jordan, Utah and my future wife (though, I had no idea at the
time that she would be my wife) lived just a few blocks southwest from my home. Although many
similarities considering the circumstances around our childhoods, we certainly did not have the same
upbringing. Understanding that we both have different backgrounds, and have each had various
experiences that have given us our current standpoint, helps tremendously in our communication as a
couple.
 Shane Park 2

Just the other day we found ourselves in a difficult communication situation. However,
understanding and acknowledging my wifes standpoint helped me to communicate better with her. Let
me paint the scene for you. We have lived in my in-laws basement for about a year and a half at this
point. We also have a baby boy that is almost one. He has slept in our room from day one, partially for
safety reasons and partially because we literally only have one giant room to make our apartment.
Having our son in our room has proven to be difficult at times considering he has only slept through the
night a handful of times. Sometimes he will wake in the middle of the night and easily be persuaded
back to sleep, other times he will decide he wants to be awake for random 1-3 hour sections of time in
the middle of the night. Being working parents we want to make it possible for our son to be in his own
room as soon as possible so as to preserve sanity for all parties involved.
We have been attempting to organize a plan in the home we are living in which is soon to have
several vacant bedrooms with various occupants now finding new living situations. When discussing
options the other night my wife suggested that her younger sister move into another room of the home
that is not as suitable for a baby. As she was explaining to the group (including me, my mother and
father in law, and my sister in law) in the dining room she felt as though she wasnt being heard and her
ideas were being tossed to the side with little to no consideration. I could tell that she was frustrated
later that evening when we had retreated to our apartment for the night so I asked her what was wrong.
She explained to me that she felt frustrated that no one seemed to really hear what she was saying and
didnt care about the ideas she had proposed. I didnt realize that she had felt this way, so I apologized
for making her feel that way even though I had considered her thoughts and feelings. I asked her to
explain why she had felt that way, and in response she let all of her built up frustrations concerning our
current living situation come out which explained very clearly why she was feeling the way she was. We
were able to have a productive conversation together concerning our upcoming changes to the families
sleeping arrangements and made a plan to discuss the options in greater depth with the other parties
that will be involved. The fact that I made the effort to ask my wife why she was feeling the way she was
helped me to understand her better, and helped us have a better conversation regarding a very
sensitive subject to our little family at this time in our lives.

Reflection
Conflict resolution has never really been a strong suit for me, not for as long as I can remember.
Taking this class has been a great opportunity for me to learn about ways to better manage conflict
through communication. Not only managing conflict through communication, but managing it well. I
have learned about standpoint theory before, but had never considered applying it to conflict
management. Having learned about it in relation to conflict, I can now apply this theory when facing
conflict in any relationship. The communication skills learned in this class have been a great help in my
life and have made me more comfortable with conflict. I no longer want to avoid conflict like the plague,
as I had previously done for so many years.

References
(Im not sure how to cite Wood, the reading from the modules doesnt have any information other than
that it was from Wood)
Kinefuchi, E. & Orbe, M. P. (2008). Situation Oneself in a Racialized World: Understanding Student
Reactions to Crash through Standpoint Theory and Context-Positionality Frames. Journal of
International and Intercultural Communication.