ENJOY,

A secretary complained about her I.T. boss....

She says, "My boss is so sex-crazed." Every time he comes into the office I must do the
LAPTOP position, and then the DESKTOP position, followed by the SPREADSHEET
format. I must LOAD UP his SOFT DISK into a HARD DISK, so that he can INSERT in
my C DRIVE and then the A DRIVE. Then he’ll ask me to EJECT his SOFTWARE
outside my C DRIVE so that he is VIRUS FREE. Then he changes his mind and decides
to ENTER, ENTER, and ENTER the whole day till he is in MICROSOFT stage. Once I
tried to ESC (escape) but he caught me and SHIFTed me to his HOME where he started
pressing @ BACKSPACE, and said "TURNOVER" Today, many a times he works
without CAPSLOCK (without "cap" or helmet") and sometimes as an ALTernative he
CRASHES @ my SYSTEM until he looses his CTRL (control) and again he LOGS IN...
This process may continue until SHUT DOWN his main SYSTEM.
===============================================================

A Frenchman and an Italian were seated next to an Englishman on an overseas flight. After a few
cocktails, the men began discussing their home lives.
'Last night I made love to my wife four times,' the Frenchman bragged, 'and this morning she
made me delicious crepes and she told me how much she adored me.'
'Ah, last night I made love to my wife six times,' the Italian responded, 'and this morning she
made me a wonderful omelet and told me she could never love another man.'
When the Englishman remained silent, the Frenchman smugly asked, 'And how many times did
you make love to your wife last night?'
'Once,' he replied.
'Only once?' the Italian arrogantly snorted. 'And what did she say to you this morning?'
'Don't stop.'

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Why nov-14th is children's day?

Ans: because it is exactly after 9 months of Valentine’s Day

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Why computers are female?

Answer:

6. As soon as you have one, a better one is just around the corner.
5. No one but the creator understands the internal logic.
4. Even your smallest mistakes are immediately committed to memory for future reference.
3. The native language used to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to
everyone else.
2. The message 'Bad Command or File Name' is about as informative as 'If you don't know why
I'm mad at you, then I'm certainly not going to tell you'.
AND THE NUMBER ONE REASON COMPUTERS ARE FEMALE:
1. As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending half of your paycheck
on accessories for it!
Kumbleji ki nai nai shadi hui,
Dulhan biha ke laye,
Dono ki sab thitholi karte,
Bedroom mein chhod ke aaye,
Dulha-Dulahhha naye naye,
Kuchh sharmaye, kuchh ghabraye,
Dhire-dhire thoda-thoda,
Ek dusre se sharmate batiyaye,
Anth mein aahistase,
Kummbleji farmaye,
" Ab to hamein eksaath rehana hai,
Kuchh lafda-locha ho to bol do",
Dulhan sharmayi, kuch na boli,
Kumbleji sawal dohraye,
Dulhan chupke se boli,

" Hum kya kahe, aap hi samazo,

Spinner ko kabhi nai bol milati hai kya?"

Que : Why Waheeda Rehman didn't change the saree throughout the song in
guide?

All of you must have seen the Dev Anand mega hit film 'Guide'. In the film
there is a famous song 'gaata rahe mera dil...'. In this song, Waheeda
Rehman wears a pink saree and throughout the song wears the same dress. So
when we have a trend of heroines changing clothes every sequence, the big
question is: Why doesn't Waheda Rehman change her saree throughout the
entire song The answer to this is simply amazing and no amount of head
scratching will give you the answer!
And the answer is..............
\
\
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\
\
\
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\
\
\
\
\
\
\
\
\
\
\
\
\
\
\
\
\
\
Because in the first stanza of the song, Dev Anand sings the following
lines:
'Oo mere humrahi,
meri bah thamen chalna,
badle duniya 'SAREE' ,
tum na badalna...

************************************************
The great Ass Story of Pakistan

Musharraf wanted to raise money for his country, and on being told that here was a fortune
in horse racing, decided to purchase one and enter it in the races. However at the local auction,
the going price for a horse was very high that he ended up buying a donkey instead.
He figured that since he had it, he might as well go ahead and enter it in the races. To his
surprise, the donkey came in third!
The next day the local paper read: “MUSHARRAF'S ASS SHOWS”
Mian Sahib was so pleased with the donkey that he entered it in the race again, and this time it
won. The paper read: "MUSHARRAF'S ASS OUT IN FRONT"
His wife was so upset with this kind of publicity that she ordered Mian MUSHARRAF not to enter
the donkey in another race.
The paper headline read: "WIFE SCRATCHES MUSHARRAF'S ASS"

This was too much for WIFE, so she ordered MUSHARRAF to get rid of the donkey. Mian
Sahib decided to give it to BENAZIR.
The paper headline the next day read: "BENAZIR TAKES MUSHARRAF'S ASS" followed by
another on the next day: "NOW BENAZIR HAS BEST ASS IN TOWN"

All the opposition leaders got very upset at this kind of publicity. They informed Benazir that
she would have to get rid of the donkey, so she sold it to a farmer for Rs.500. Next day the
headline read: "BENAZIR SELLS ASS FOR Rs. 500"

This was too much for the veteran opposition leader, Nawabzada Khan, so he ordered Benazir
to buy back the donkey it to the plains where it could run wild and free. Next day, in the paper
read: "BENAZIR ANNOUNCES HER ASS IS WILD AND FREE"
The Nawabzada was buried the next day and Pakistan got rid of the Ass it had produced in the
bargain.