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27 JUN 2018
Greg Prosser Uruguay whose moose population re- dominance of Canada shows no signs
mains stable at eleven. of abating though with this year’s
Breaks World According to Robbie McRobson, moose population expected to match
head of the UN Moose Preserva- last year’s record figures of one hun-
Cocksucking tion Council, worldwide moose num- dred million billion.
bers are expected to grow markedly Europe’s rise as an international
Record on last year due to the traditional moose power will slow slightly this
By BALLS MCJIGGLE
moose strongholds of Canada and the year as a response to the European
United States, with the larger de- Union’s move towards standardising
veloping moose ecologies also poised the European moose. Stringent qual-
to make gains. The largest percent- ity controls are holding back the de-
Super Raging Gaylord, Greg agege increase in moose will likely velopment of the eastern european
Prosser had aimed to service 200 come from China’’, says McRobson, populations compared to last year
lucky blow job happy men, but some- The Chinese government has invested when they contributed significantly
thing went wrong with his mouth and heavily in moose infrastructure over to europe’s strong growth figures.
the gay porn stars attempt at world the past decade, and their committ- Norway, which is not an EU member
record blow job history. ment to macrofauna is beginning to but has observer status, strengthed
An exhaused Gewg Prosser could pay dividends’’. Since 2004 China has in numbers relative to the Euro area
no longer take the strenous blow job expanded moose pasture from 1.5% with numbers of Norweigian moose,
action and was forced to call off the of arable land to nearly 3.648% and known locally as elk’’ expected to rise
record bid when he collapsed after moose numbers are expected to rise for the tenth consecutive year, partic-
reaching her 175th man. to 60,000 making China a net moose ularly thanks to a strong showing in
Suffering from breathing difficul- exporter for the first time. This is the last quarter.
ties, Greg was rushed to hospital in good news for neighbouring Mongo- As moose season reaches its close,
San Francisco, California where doc- lia, a barren moose-wasteland whose researchers world wide are turning to
tors had to pump his stomach. inhabitents nonetheless have an insa- science in an attempt to boost next
tiable desire for the creatures. The in- year’s figures. NASA stunned the
crease in Beijing-Ulanbataar trade is scientific community today with the
anticipated to relieve pressure on the announcment of their discovery that
relatively strained Russian suppliers, the moon is significantly smaller than
but increase Mongolia’s imbalance of previously believed. This conclusion,
trade with its larger neighbour. which is the conclusion of a ten-
Historically the only competitor year collaborative project, will have
Reuters to China in the far eastern moose profound implications for the moose
markets has been Singapore but the community as the gravitational field
tiny island nation is set to report a is now known to be of the right
International net loss, expecting a decrease of more strength to support moose in orbit.
than five percent on last year’s 50,000 According to John Johnson, head
Moose Count moose counted. The head of Singa- of the NASA Moon Sizing Experi-
pore’s Agency for Agriculture, Jing-
Underway Feng Lau, explained to an incredu-
ment the first delivery of moose into
low moon orbit could be achieved as
By BOB O’BOBSTON
lous Singaporean parliament yester- early as the third quarter of next year.
day that bad weather had contributed The technology to nurture moose in
to this season’s poor showing, most space is available now’’, he said, ’’all
notably when a cargo of 150 moose that is needed is political will’’.
The UN-sponsored International were swept out into the Indian ocean
Moose Census got off to a flying in a monsoon.
start today with hopes for an increase Yet again the global demand for
in the worldwide moose population moose will be met largely by the
Granny wins
compared to last year’s disapointing
figures. Among the traditional early
US and Canada. The recession-hit
States is taking comfort in its moose
World Wrestling
reporters were Egypt, returning fig- growth figures with gross production Championship
ures of six moose, a twenty percent expected to break 700,000 and net ex-
increase on 2011’s figures of five, and ports to grow by 2%. The worldwide By ROY MCROYSTON
The Gay Dick Weekly 27 JUN 2018 2