#shortstoryPAPEL

Finding Nemo

by 42

011018 | 752

Whenever I look around the world, around every single person walking around the streets of endless
uncertainty, I couldn’t help not to ask myself this one question I’ve been asking everyone else for the
past five years— where are you going? Everyone had become busy finding their ways, and just like
everyone else, I was another lost traveler looking for the path on the way to an unsure destination
people call the future. It was way ahead of where I was, old people would say whenever I try to ask them
where it is. Sometimes, I would follow where everyone else was going, I walk to wherever they were
heading, hoping that maybe, maybe I was in the right place— but I wasn’t. That is when I knew people
had different destinations; some go to the future, some enter this door called death, some of them pass
by a street called sadness, some stayed there for good, some visit a place called happiness, some chose
to stay, and the others were just like me— lost. In my five years of searching, no one was kind enough to
give me a tour, not even my own mother and father who were busy looking for their own ways while I
was left alone in the streets, wondering where to go. People would just pass by me like I was nothing but
an electric post standing in the way. But it didn’t matter anymore, for I was already happy whenever I
would see people getting to their destinations.

Like my sister Aliquis.

I remember her telling me how she went through all those doors, and whenever she was scared she
would just close her eyes and pretend it was just a dream. I did as she said, and every time I was
standing in the middle of the street filled with people running away from their destined paths, I would
close my eyes and everything changes. The noisy sound of people’s feet were now soft music playing in
my ears, the whispers in the wind were replaced by the sweet humming of birds, and the cold breeze of
air that used to hug me becomes warm sunlight touching my skin. And when I open my eyes again, the
place has changed. I have changed. I grew taller, my hair grew longer, my face looked different. I was
different, but I was still myself. Those people I used to follow were no longer walking on the streets, but
there were more people lost now than I remember. I wish Aliquis was here to guide me to the future, but
she’s gone like most people I know. The last time I saw her, we were playing hide and seek. I was the one
supposed to look for her so I closed my eyes. She even planted a kiss on my forehead and told me to
count from one to ten. I did. When I opened my eyes, she was gone. Where she went? I had no idea, but
I was sure I wouldn’t see her again. Just like how I didn’t see our parents again the moment we rode the
train called depression. I got out of the train, they didn’t. Old people told me that they have already
found their destinations, and that I should find mine too. I lost three people, and all I did was walk on the
street. Is that how cruel the world is?

Maybe, maybe not.

I asked every single person I met where they’re going. Most of them didn’t know, some were too scared
to know. Some already knew, some were already heading there, some just stayed where they are.
Sometimes, I hate being a kid. I hate knowing less, I hate knowing nothing. Old people will tell me
knowing everything makes you afraid to try something, or worse, it makes you want to change things
that were already meant to stay as they are. But some said knowledge is power, and if I knew everything
about the world, maybe I’ll know where I’m going. Maybe I can find Aliquis and our parents, even my
friends. That’s how I started looking for someone who knows everything— Nemo.

I looked for him everywhere, I went to every door, every street but he was nowhere to be found. I asked
people if they knew where he is, but they would just laugh at me and tell me that he’s not real. Nemo
isn’t real. They told me I would just lose my mind if I continued looking for him, that they also tried, but
they didn’t find him. But what if he’s real? What if he was just lost like me, waiting for someone to find
him so he can get to where he should be? I wanted to see him, I had to see him. He’s my only chance to
know the truth about the world, to know what happened to everyone I cared about. So I didn’t give up, I
looked for him everywhere. I took the train again, only this time around, I barely got out. But I didn’t give
up. I looked for him in the street called sadness, I wandered in the doors of illusion, I took the car of fate,
but no luck. Maybe Nemo really isn’t real.

I looked at myself in the mirror of an abandoned candy store. I look different now, my face looked old,
my hair grew longer, my body was thinner than it used to be, I had facial hair, but my eyes were still the
same. I didn’t recognize myself, but I can still see the kid that used to wait by this very candy store to
open so he can buy his favorite candy can every Christmas. How much time had gone by? Where was I
the whole time? I sat on the sidewalk and looked around just like what I used to do before. The world
changed so fast, everything changed and it was too late for me to realize it. A lot of people walked
through the door called death, some were just kids with gunshots on their heads and chests, they were
cold white, pregnant women went in as well, soldiers marched through, kids and teenagers with ribbons
on their necks and wrists entered the door and there were old people laughing as they entered the door.
They were inviting me to come over and join them but I stayed where I was and closed my eyes, not
because I was scared but because I knew where I was going.

I knew where everyone else went.

When I opened my eyes, I saw an image of a person. It was a kid. He was standing in front of me and he
reached his hand over to mine. The sunlight shone over his face that he was hard to look at. I slightly
covered my eyes and focused looking at him. When I saw him clearly, he just smiled at me.

“Come on.”

My lips quivered as I spoke. “Who are you?”

“You don't remember me?” he queried as he pulled me up. “I thought I'd never see you anymore.”

Confusion drew all over my face. “I-I’m sorry. I… I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

“Everyone’s been looking for you, Nemo."