Professional Documents
Culture Documents
The Art of Styling Sentences PDF
The Art of Styling Sentences PDF
by
MARIE L. WADDELL
Assistant Professor
Director of Fr-eshmen English
ROBERTA R. WALKER
Assistant Professor
DEPAR':MENT OF ENGL(SH
The University of Texas at El Paso
91011 1213
iv
Sentence
Marie L. Waddell
CHAPTER 2
Robert M. Esch
Roberta R. Walker The Twenty Patterns for Style and Variety 5
Repetitions 32
9. Repetition of a key term 34
9a. A variation: same word repeated in a parallel
structure 38
10. Emphatic appositive at end, after a colon 40
IDa. A variation: Appositive at end after a dash 42
Modifiers 45
Il. Interrupting modifier between subject and verb 46
Il a. A full sentence as interrupting modifier 48
12. Introductory or concluding participles 50
13. A single modifier out of place for emphasis 52
Inversions
14. Preposition al phrase before the and verb
56 Almost anyone can benefit more about
15. Object or complement before subject and verb You don't have to be a student in any school to benefit from
15a. Complete inversion of normal pattern 60
aIl you need is the desire to write well. And you must
An Assortment of Patterns to create better sentences or you would not be reading this
16. Paired constructions 62 you know how to write good, basic sentences yet find that
16a. More paired constructions, for contrast only 64 lack something, that they sound immature because they have no
17. Dependent clauses as subject or object or comple- no style, then this little book is for you.
ment 66
18. Absolute construction anywhere in sentence 68 But if you want to write better sentences, how do you go about
19. The short simple sentence for relief or dramatic doing it? I1's simple. You learn to write better sentences just the way
effect 70 you learn almost every other skill: by imitating the ex amples of those
19a. A short question for dramatic effect 72
20. The deliberate fragment who already have that skill. You probably have already discovered
that it is easier to rnaster anything - whether it is jumping hurdles,
CHAPTER 3
doing a swan dive, playing the guitar, parking your car - if you are
Sentences Grow Sorne More 76 willing to practice imitating a model. Nowhere is this principle more
Combining the Patterns-Ten Ways as in Chapter 2 76 obvious than in writing; just take Benjamin Franklin's word for it.
Expanding Sentences 78 like that shrewd man, you are willing to irnprove your writing skills
CHAPTER 4 copying models of clear sentences, then this book with its five different
Figurative Language in Your Sentences chapters will help you to rnaster the skill of writing anything weIl
81
even gracefully and with style.
Simile 81 Metaphor 82 Analogy 84
Allusion 85
CHAPTER 1 reviews briefly what constitutes a sentence. If you don't
CHAPTER 5
really understand the functions of different parts of a sentence, you rnay
The Twenty Patterns-In Print need a supplernentary book with a fuller discussion of sentence structure.
This chapter sirnply and briefly reviews the various parts of the sentence
"Tough Country" from c. L. Sonnichsen's Tularosa
(Devin-Adair) 87 utilizing the tradition al terrns you will find in the explanations and
Arthur Schlesinger, Excerpt from A Thousand Days descriptions of the patterns in Chapter II. Analyze these sentences until
(Houghton-Mifflin) 94
you understand their various parts.
Suggested Review Questions 97 THE WHOlE IS THE SUM OF ITS PARTS
Why Punctuate'l 102
Punctuation: A Signal System 102 CHAPTER 2, the heart of this book, contains twenty different sentence
patterns, sorne with variations. If you study the graphie picture of each
viii
pattern (the rnaterial in the nurnbered boxes) and also notice the analogy, or allusion - into your own
precise punctuation dernanded by that you will then be able never merely echo or rehash sorne
to irnitate these different kinds of sentences in your own writing. The cliché. Create new images from your own experiences, from your own
explanations un der each boxed pattern will further clarify HOW and way of 100king at life.
WHEN you should use a particular pattern; the exarnples following the IMAGINATION IS ONE CORNERSTONE STYLE
explanations will give you rnodels to study and ta imÏtate. With these
as guides, you should th en practice writing and revising until you rnaster CHAPTER 5 contains excerpts from the works of expenenced wrÏters
the skill of constructing better sentences. who have incorporated patterns like these in their paragraphs.
As you revise, take sorne of your original sentences and deliberately the marginal notes which give the pattern numbers you have learned
rewrite thern to fit sorne of the se patterns. This technique rnay at first from studying CHAPTER 2. Then go analyze something you are reading;
seern tao deliberate, tao contrived an atternpt at an artificial style. Sorne discover for yourself how writers handle their sentences and their
of the sentences you create rnay not even "sound like you." But what punctuation. And don't be afraid ta imitate them when you write. You
rnay seern like mere artifice at first will ultimately be the means ta will, of course, find "patterns" (arrangements of words in sentences)
greater ease in writing with flair and style. which are not in CHAPTER 2 of this little book. Imitate others as well
as the twenty we present.
SKlll CaMES FROM PRACTICE
UNDERSTANDING CaMES FROM ANAlYSIS
Your first draft of any communication - letter, theme, report, wrÏtten
or oral speech - will almost always need revision. When you first try
to express ideas in sentences, you are mainly interested in capturing
your elusive thoughts, in making them concrete enough on a sheet of
paper for you to think about them clearly. The second step in writing
- in fact, where writing really begins - is revision. Indeed, as many
great stylists agree and most students soon discover, good writing
actually begins with rewriting. Since this is true, you must work delib-
erately to express your captured ideas in clear and graceful sentences.
ClEAR WRITING CaMES FROM REWRITING
CHAPTER 3 will show you how sorne of the basic twenty styling patterns
in CHAPTER 2 can combine with other patterns. Study the examples
given and described in CHAPTER 3; then let your imagination direct your
own efforts at making effective combinations of the different patterns.
COMsrNA TiaNS lEAD Ta ENDlESS v ARI ETY
CHAPTER 4 will show you how to express your thoughts in fresh, figu-
rative language. Study the pattern for each figure of speech described
there, and then deliberately try to insert an occasional one - simile,
Since this method of teaching students to write by imitation will be new As we said in the introduction to the CHAPTER 1 does not
to some instructors, we hope this section will offer suggestions that tend to be a complete discussion of English sentence structure.
will find helpful and practical. For the inexperienced teacher we want to English prose sentence took several centuries to develop and is, as
anticipate some possible questions and provide some practical classroom Winston Churchill said, a "noble thing" indeed. There are entire books
guidelines; for the experienced teacher, we hope to offer a fresh approach dedicated to an explanation of it; hence our coverage is minimal.
to an old problem: getting students to write papers that are not too dull The main thing to do with CHAPTER 1 is to review with your class
and boring for them to write or for the teacher to read. The following the five important "slots" in the standard sentence -. subject, verb, com-
pages contain some hints for ways of teaching material in chapters one plement, modifier, and connectoI. Be sure the students understand the
and two. Additional pages addressed to students will also suggest val- terms and the functions of each. Give them sorne class practice in sepa-
uable ways for the teacher to present the patterns and other techniques rating subjects from verbs in any of their current reading. It is sometimes
to a class. (See pages xvi to xxii.) easier for students to find the essential skeleton of the sentence if first
they cross out, or put in parentheses, aIl of the preposition al phrases
(which are usually mere modifiers, anyway). Then let them discuss the
differences between phrases and clauses, between independent and de-
pendent clauses, between declarative and imperative sentences. Never
assume that your students will be very adept at this kind of analysis.
They won't. Therefore guide them carefully with detailed explanation
and many examples on the board.
x
xii THE ART OF STYlING SENTENCES Suggestions the Instrudor
sentences will be easier for you to check and more fun for the your students rewrite if several times using four or five dltten::nt
class to discuss, to compare how many different arrangements of sentence patterns. (These revisions may have to contain
words can express the same ide a but with slightly different words that the original does not have.) Have students read these
emphasjs or rhythm. sentences aloud in class, commenting on the various effects thus
2. Use SENTENCE PATTERN 1, the compound with a semieolon and achieved.
without a conjunction, to teach or to test vocabulary. In the first 7. Point out to students the effectiveness of incorporating SENTENCE
clause of the compound have students USE and UNDER- PA TTERN 8 (the one with two or three dependent clauses) in their
SCORE the word in a sentence; in the second part have them thesis or using it to forecast their main points in the introduction
DEFINE that word in a sentence. or to summarize. the entire composition in the conclusion.
EXAMPLE: Zen Buddhism is an esoteric philosophy; only the S. Toward the end of the term, after they have mastered the
initiated really understand it. tems and know them by number, have students analyze sorne
of their current reading, ev en from other courses. Have
OR THIS VARIATION write in the margin the numbers of the sentence patterns they
The Greek root chrono means "time"; a chrono- find in other writers. (See CHAPTER 5 for two ex amples of this.)
meter measures time accurately. (See how much you
can teach about punctuation in a sentence with
this structure!)
and tone when you express the same idea with different
and punctuation. You may not be aware of these changes
unless you read aloud, so do it often because reading out loud
The suggestions and exercises below may seem too simple or too artificial will train your ear.
at first sight, but if you make a game of playing around with words, of 4. Analyze your reading material for interesting sentences, ones that
fitting them to the formula, you will probably enjoy yourself. You will you think have good patterns which you could imitate. (CHAP-
certainly learn how to write sentences that have sorne flair, and that TER 5 shows you how.) Whether you are reading a newspaper,
is a skill worth developing because a well-constructed sentence is, like a magazine article, or a skillfully styled literary work, you will
any artful design, the result of good craftsmanship; it actual1y involves find many sentences so weIl written that you will want to analyze
and requires: and then imitate them. Underline them; learn the pattern. Or
from your reading make a collection of sentences that you have
1. good composing or construction
especially enjoyed. Or keep a special note book of new and dif-
2. accurate punctuation
ferent patterns that you want to copy. In short, look for new
3. a feeling for the rhythm of language
and different kinds of sentences in everything you read and
4. an understanding of idiom
make a conscious effort to add those new patterns to the basic
5. darity of expression.
twenty in CHAPTER 2.
If you are not in a composition class, but are working alone without
a teacher's guidance, the suggestions below will help you to get the most
out of this book, sa do follow them carefully. Don't be afraid to copy a
pattern and fit your own words into it. Remember that aIl great crafts-
men begin as apprentices imitating a master. By following the suggestions
below and mastering the sentence patterns, you will increase your skill
in the art of styling sentences.
xvi
xviii T E o STYlING SENT NeES
remember. That tact is the truth expressed here is aU he needs to be for. The same is
beautifully Shakespeare -- life goes on forever Sam when a well-known fastballer
toward its never down or back. from feet
Our lives do indeed "hasten to their """·,.. ,.,,c,~ loses his ~==:::L
xxii THE R S T Y liN G SE N TE NeE
Now Iet's break up a very simple type of sentence into its two parts.
The beés are swarming.
The zebras stampeded.
Il
Try making up your own ex ample following the pattern above; box the
subject and verb, and insert a pair of vertical lines between these two
basic parts of the sentence. Only two slots are necessary - the S (sub-
ject) slot and the V (verb) sIot.
~~~LII
Il
2 THE ART OF STYLING SENTENCES The Sentence
Combining the S slot and the V slot, you can construct the most com- write. With this combination yOll can build an infinite of
mon sentence pattern. complex sentence patterns. Each new subject-verb combination
require a new pair of lilines. Longer sentences rnay have only one Sand
Each sentence pattern has a tradition al name, describing its pur- one V slot with one pair of vertical lines. Sorne tirnes there will be
pose and the task it performs: one S; sornetirnes there will be two or more subjects aIl in the sarne
TASK NAME slot because they come before the vertical lines separating S from V.
A sentence may make- a statement. Declarative The verb slot also may have one verb or several verbs.
May it also ask a question? Interrogative
Let it give an order. Imperative Cinderella and Frinella Il were sisters but hated each other.
What great emotion it can express! Exclamatory Sentences often have added attractions - something after the verb which
is neither a rnodifying word nor a phrase, yet even these sentences may
As you add words to modify the subject and verb, you will create have but one S and one V slot. If the verb is transitive, you will find
longer sentences, sorne with phrases, others with clauses. Quite simply, a direct object following it. In the following exarnples (aU simple sen-
a phrase is a group of words containing no subject-verb combination tences), direct objects appear.
but acting as a modifier. Clauses, however, are considerably more
complex. A clause is a group of words containing a subject-verb EXAMPLE: Benjy Il forgot his galoshes.
combination; sometimes the clause expresses a complete thought, but
not always. Agnes 1 \~ed her teacher's glares and continued
INDEPENDENT CLAUSE
her mischieÎ-making.
makes a complete statement
communicates an idea by itself
NOTE:
DEPENDENT CLAUSE modifies a unit in another clause Throughout this chapter one line will underline the subject;
does not communicate a complete two lines, the verb.
thought
may be a unit in another clause.
If the verb is intransitive, however, there may be subject completers
These two types of clauses combine to form various types of sentences,
(subject complements) which are nouns, pronouns, or adjectives. The
but the most common sentences are these:
following sentences illustrate the single SIIV cornbination with one or
SIMPLE makes a single statement more subject complements.
is an independent clause
has a subject and verb combination. ExAMPLE: Anne Boleyn was Henry VIII's second wife.
COMPOUND makes two or more statements Women's ernotions may be _ _ _ _ or _ __
has two or more independent clauses _ _ _ _ or or _ __
has two or more subject-verb combinations.
(YOU try filling in the blanks abovel)
COMPLEX has an independent clause
has one or more dependent clauses To aimost everY'part of the sentence you may add modifying words
functioning as modifiers.
and phrases. You will still retain the single subject-verb combination
or eise expand your sentence to include severai subject-verb com-
The subject-verb combination is the he art of each sentence you
binations, aIl having modifiers. Distinguish main clauses by putting Il
THE ART 0 F ST y LI N G SEN T E N CE S
between the S V in the main clause and 1 between the S V in the de-
pendent clauses; then underline independent clauses and put brackets
around dependent clauses.
And now you're off ... on the way to creating better sentences,
more polished paragraphs.
1 The Patterns
+ a subject-verb a ...... . . .
""LU .... L ....
This ~rag:nent is a dependent clause, in spite of the subject-verb statement. N ever put a semicolon after the following construction:
combma~IOns (w.hi~h was and he could), bec au se of the dependent
For example; ....
word at lhe begmnmg. Remember this equation: and the +"".,. . ,..,.,,1""1-1H·O below zero;
Because the snow was
The work been finished five o'clock~
ln the space below, irnitate this and crea te sorne
THE ART OF STYLING SENTENCES sentences your own.
This pattern is really the same as PATTERN 1, but here you The feminine mystique is intuitive, not rational;
will omit the verb in the second clause BECAUSE and ONLY IF aesthetic, not pragmatic.
it would needlessly repeat the verb of the first clause anyway. In There's an interesting difference in books on the subject of se~:
other words, the comma says to the reader, "Here you should in handbooks about dating, the experts tell you how to aVOld
mentally insert the same verb you have already read in the first H', in handbooks about marriage, how to enjoy it.
clause."
This construction naturally implies a need for more or less
parallel wording in both clauses; the verb, of course, must be The Eskimo lives in an igloo; the American Indian, in a teepee.
exactly the same. The Scottish Highlander sports a tam-a:.. shanter; the Texas Ranger,
For ex ample, this is not parallel: a Stetson or ten-gallon hat.
Sorne note-takers try to take down aIl the information from the
We like classical music
lecturer; others, only the main points.
The Russian ballerina wears a tutu; the Malaysian dancer, a brightly
1 1 1 1
George hard rock colored sarong.
The reader could not take the verb from the first clause and The quest for righteousness is Oriental; the quest for knowledge,
put it where the comma is, because "George like hard rock" is Occidental.
ungrammatical and improper. BUT even if your wording is parallel, A red light means stop; a green light, go.
even if the omitted verb is exactly like the one in the first clause, Terry always ordered a single dip of strawberry ice cream; Freddie,
you may still have an awkward-sounding sentence if you forget a banana split with pecans, two dips of chocolate fudge, and
the importance of rhythm and sound. whipped cream on top.
For ex ample, read this aloud:
Darby played a musical number by Bach; Joan, Beethoven. Be sure that there really are two inde pendent clauses here even
This sentence, read aloud, sounds as if Darby played something though the second one has an unexpressed verb.
written by three people!
Be absolutely sure that the verb omitted in the second clause
10
matches exactly the verb in the first clause.
E ST LING SENTENCES
This rule applies to whatever you after the semicolon. ln the space below, irnitate this pattern and create sorne
If you leave out more than the be sure the structure is sentences of your own.
and the thought is complete.
Use a semicolon if there is no conjunction; use a comma if
there is a joining, coordinate conjunction.
13
3 The Patterns
14
THE ART OF STYlING SEN ENCES
17
Since any part of the sentence may have a
take care to make a11 items in the series pa1~all'el
are already parallel in function.
Find the items that are not parallel in this incorrect sentence:
EXPLANATION:
Swimming, surfing, to go boating - these were SaUy's fa-
This pattern is the simplest form of the series. The items mak- vorite sports at the summer camp.
ing up the series are separated by commas, and in this special pat-
tern there is no conjunction linking the final two items. Omitting this Now explain why this revis ion is better:
conjunction in the series here is effective, for it gives your sentence Swimming, surfing, boating - these were Sally's favorite
a quick, staccato sound, a sound of crispness and liveliness. sports at the summer camp.
Develop your ear!
NOTE: Although it is not a pattern discussed in this book,
Read the series aloud so you can hear whether the items flow you may want to remember that the commonest pattern
together smoothly and euphoniously without the conjunction be- for series - A , B "and C - should always have the
fore the last item. Remember that tone and sound and fluency comma before the conjunction; otherwise, the may
are important considerations here. be confused or may compietely misread the meaning:
18
ln the space below, irnitate this pattern and create sorne
sentences of your own.
EXPLANATION:
EXAMPLES:
Peering down from the hill, Merlin could see the castle swathed in
gloom and fear and death.
Despite his handicaps, 1 have never seen Larry angry or cross or
depressed.
1 would never react weIl to sudden blindness; rd be weepy and
depressed and resentful.
Once you master the rhumba and the tango, you can turn to the
more difficult South American dances like the samba or the·
cha-cha or the mambo.
AIl that is good and decent and respectable seems abhorrent to
sorne anarchists.
5 1 Patterns
EXPLANATION:
EXAMPLES:
22
6: A. E .... Jl"-'''''..;''u ..... Lewis
<-''. 'L-U,LI.. V.U, Edward
nineteenth achieved fame
1I'nr"'''('I',,",
CHECKPOINTS:
EXAMPLES:
Check the punctuation of this pattern:
The trees and the earth and the green water on the lakes, the hills
that were near and the far-off hills - aU toid their stories. 1. there must be commas between the appositives in the
series;
The crack of the lion trainer's whip, the dissonant music of the
calliope, the neighs of Arabian staUions - these sounds 2. there must be a dash after the series.
mean "circus" to aU children.
Check ta see that there is a summary word at the beginning
To struggle, to exist, and so to create his own soul- tbis is man's of the maip clause.
great task. -
Love, hate, resentment, fear, anger, ambition - how many are the As in any series, aIl these appositives must be parallel in
emotions that direct our day-dreams! structure and in meaning.
24
Do you have two dashes?
EXAMPLES:
26
Again, it takes not one, but to make a -two
dashes, two parentheses, two commas.
EXPLANATION:
This pattern is Iike PATTERN 7 except that it has only one or two
items for the appositive instead of a full series. Here, the appositive
may be a single word or a pair of words; it may or may not have
modifiers. In this variation, there is aiso an interruption in thought
immediately after the subject, but here the appositive can have a
variety of effects, depending on your punctuation:
a pair of dashes will make the appositive dramatic;
parentheses will make it almost whisper;
a pair of commas will make it almost inconspicuous
becaus; they are so ordinary.
EXAMPLES:
A familiar smell- fresh blood -- assailed his jungle-trained
nostrils.
The ultimate poIlu ter - you and l, my friend - must share the
burden and the guilt for having created this dirty world.
Two phases in the creative process - discovery and invention-
seem to reinforce each other.
His former wife (once a famous Philadelphia model) now owns
a well-known boutique in the Bahamas.
The Elizabethan concept of artifice (craftmanship well-executed
and therefore admirable) made the word "artificial" a compli-
ment, not a criticism.
Her joyous shouts of Iaughter - a delight to aIl who knew her-
no one will ever forget.
28
1
8:
In Biology 3130 Stella learned that a hu:mrrlin~~bi1~d
that a screech owl actually whistles,
prefer to wade in water rather than fly around carrying
babies .
. , ., if 0' •• ,
When he smelled the pungent odor of pine, when he heard
When ... ,
chatter of jays interrupting the silence, when
startled doe, the hunter knew he had reached the
the forest.
If you promise ta keep your sax under the bed, if you agree to
help me with the dishes every evening and take out the garbage
EXPLANATION: pail every morning, if you really will "love, honor, and obey,"
The preceding patterns have shawn series with single words or then 1 might marry you.
phrases. This pattern shows a series with dependent clauses. AIl of Whether one needs fantasy or whether one needs stark realisrn,
the clauses in this series must be dependent; they must also be the theater can become a Mecca.
paraIlel in structure; they must express conditions or situations or Since he had little imagination and since he had even less talent, he
provisions dependent upon the idea expressed in the main clause. was un able ta get the position.
This series of dependent clauses may come at the beginning or at
the end of the sentence. You will normaIly have two or three clauses
here; rarely will four or five sound graceful and smooth. Try not
Don't think there must always be three dependent clauses
ta struggle for style; be natural, relaxed, never forced.
here. Two will work in this pattern also (see the last two examples
This pattern is a very special one. Save it for special places, above).
special functions. It is particularly helpful
1. at the end of a single paragraph ta summarize the major Wh ether you have only two or a full series of three or more,
points; whether you have the clauses at the beginning or end of the sen-
2. in structuring a thesis statement having three parts tence, you should arrange them in sorne arder of increasing impact
(or points); (see fourth ex ample ) .
3. in the introductory or concluding paragraphs to bring
together the main points of a composition in a single
sentence.
EXAMPLES:
Hecause it might seern difficult at first, because it rnay sound awk-
ward or forced, because it often creates lengthy sentences
where the thought "gets lost," this pattern seems forbidding
to sorne writers, but it isn't all that hard; try it.
30
Commas, dashes, periods, colons, and semicolons
A repetition is a restatement of a term; you may repeat the term degrees of pause. comma makes a brief pause: w~ereas a dash
once or several times within a sentence or a paragraph. signaIs a longer pause. There is a kind of finaht~ m the pauses
created by the colon, the semicolon, and the penod. The colon
use suggests that important words will follow, whereas. the. .
(like the period) is an arresting mark of punctuatlOn slgnalmg a
Repetitions help to echo key words, to emphasize important ideas
full stop before another idea begins.
or main points, to unify sentences, or to develop coherence between
sentences. Skillful repetitions of important words or phrases create Con si der these differences; decide what kind of pause you .
"echoes" in the reader's mind: they emphasize and point out key then punctuate, remembering that these marks are not really mter-
ideas. Sometimes you will use these "echo words" in different changeable. Each one suggests a different kind of pause.
sentences - even in different paragraphs - to help "ho ok" your
ideas together. NOTE:
Once you have mastered repetitions in the same sentence,
you will be ready to repeat sorne key words or phrase~
throughout your paragraphs, even from one paragraph to
you cre ote repetitions? the next. In your reading, look for the many ways that
Simply allow sorne important word to recur in a sentence or. in a writers effectively repeat sorne of their key words, scatter-
paragraph or ev en in different paragraphs. These "echo words" ing them around at various places in the sentence
may come any place in the sentence: with the subjects or the in different places throughout the same paragraph. In
verbs, with the objects or the complements, with prepositions or one paragraph Rachel Carson, for example, used "sea"
other parts of speech. You need not always repeat the exact form ten times' Winston Churchill repeated the phrase "we
of the word; think of other forms the word may take, such as freak shall figh~" eight times, using it to emphasize various
(noun) , freaking (participle) , freaky (adjective) , freakiness points throughout one dramatic speech.
(noun), freakish (adjective) freakishly and freakily (adverbs) ,
and freakishness (noun).
32
1 The
Every writer must obey what someone called the "eleventh com-
In this pattern you will repeat sorne key word in a modif in mandment," the commandment not to puzzle his reader.
phrase atta~h~d to the main clause. You may repeat the ~or~ We an inhabit a mysterious, inorganic world - the inner world,
exactly as 1t IS, or you may use another form of it: brute may the world of the mind.
become
'
brutal; jreak may become jreaky' battle
J may b ecome A. E. Housman used this pattern #9 at the end of a famous lecture:
baUZmg. "The tree of knowledge will remain forever, as it was in the
A key term is a word important enough to be repeated It beginning, a tree to be desired to make one wise."
~an come anywhere in the sentence, but the repetition of the w~rd In "The Lottery" Shirley Jackson mocles community worship of
18 most. common toward the end. Or, if you have a key word in outworn customs, customs that no longer have meaning, cus-
the subject slot of the sentence, the repetition of it may b f toms that deny man his inherent dignity and link him with
example, a part of an interrupting modifier. e, or the uncivilized world of beasts.
You may also vary this pattern slightly by using a dash instead Neither the warning in the tarot cards -- an ominous warning
of a comma; :emember that the dash suggests a longer pause, a about the dangers of air flight - nor the one on her ouija
greater break III thought than the comma permits. board could deter Marsha from volunteering for the first
Mars shot.
NOTE NUMBER ONE: Looking into the cottage we saw great splotches of blood smeared
~e sur~ that the word is worthy of repetition. Notice how on the walls, wans that only that morning had rung with
meffective the following "little Lulu" sentence is and all b _ shouts of joy and merriment.
cause of the repetition of an uninteresting, over~orked wor~.
~e was a g?od father, providing a good home for CHECKPOINTS:
bIS good chlldren. ~
Double check! Notice that the repetition is in a phrase,
NOTE NUMBER TWO:
not a clause. In tbis pattern, the words following the comma MUST
NOT have a subject or a verb with the repeated word; the result
~e sure that the attached phrase with the repeated key term would be a comma splice (comma fauIt).
IS NOT a complete sentence; if it is, you will inadvertently
create a comma splice, as here: WRONG: He was part of the older generation, his generation was
He was a cruel brute of a man, he was brutal to his born before the depression. (This compound must have
family and even more brutal to his friends. a semicolon.)
34
CORRECT: He was part of the older generation, a generation born
before the depression.
THE ART OF S YliNG SENTENCES
37
1 Patterns
38
the space below, irnitate this pattern and create sorne
sentences of your own.
EXPLANATION:
Often it is an idea, not a word, that you wish ta repeat. With-
holding it until the end builds the sentence to a climax and provides
a pattern for a forceful, emphatic appositive at the end of the sen-
tence where it practically shouts for your reader's attention. In
the above pattern, the colon - because it is formaI and usually
cornes before a rather long appositive - emphasizes this climax.
Remember that the colon makes a full stop and therefore must
come only after a complete statement; it tells the reader that
important words or an explanation will follow.
EXAMPLES:
Most contemporary philosophies echo ideas from one man:
Plato, a student of Socrates and the teacher of Alexander.
A soldier goes A WOL for a very specifie purpose: ta hide from
the MP's.
A teenage girl never forgets one thing: how ta giggle.
Anyone left abandoned on a de sert should avoid two dangers:
cactus needles and rattlesnakes.
Were those twins my children, l' d make one thing clear ta them:
the curfew hour.
CHECKPOINTS:
~ Check the words belore the colon; be sure they make a full
statement (sentence).
EXAMPLES:
Most contemporary philosophies echo ideas from one man--
Plato.
The relatively few salmon that do make it to the spawning grounds
have another old tradition to deal with - male supremacy.
42
H NG SEN ENCES
ln the space below, irnitate tlzis pattern and create sorne Adding rnodifiers is a good way to clarify a sentence that is too brief
sentences of your own. or lean. Often sorne key word will require addition al
rnodifiers - in order to rnake its meaning c1ear. Modifiers are eSJ)eClaljly
helpful if you wish to appeal to your reader's senses, to add sorne
figurative language, or to rnake cornparisons or allusions.
These rnodifiers may be single words, phrases, even clauses; they
rnay be at the beginning, in the rniddle, or at the end of the sentence.
They may be ideas or descriptions or figures of speech which you add
to a sentence you are revising. Take two short, ineffective sentences.
Make one into a modifier or a dependent clause, and th en combine it
with the other sentence for a stronger, clearer construction.
You will have no trouble with modifiers if you rernernber one fact:
like leeches or magnets, they cling to the nearest possible target. There-
fore, take care to avoid misplaced or dangling modifiers. If they ding to
the wrong target, you will have an incoherent or illogical or ludicrous
sentence.
45
CHECKPOINTS:
~ The punctuation marks for this pattern must go in pairs,
with one mark before the modifier and a mark after it.
EXPLANATION:
When the modifier cornes between the subject and the verb,
you may use a pair of commas or a pair of dashes to separate it
from the main elements of the sentence. If the modifier is merely
an aside within the sentence ( a Idnd of whisper ), put parentheses
around it for variety in punctuation. This modifier need not be
just a single word; it may be a pair of words or even a phrase.
EXAMPLES:
A small drop of ink, falling like dew upon a thought, can make
millions think.
A smaU drop of ink, falling (as Byron said) like dew upon a
thought, can make millions think.
His manner - pompous and overbearing to say the least - was
scarcely to be tolerated.
46
a different drummer. Let him to the music which
however measured or far away." - echoes :sn;aK~~SDear'e'
- a sentence vice that each man should be true to himself.
of dashes or pmceutneses Nelson made his tax report on New Year's Day - not with
joyment (who could ever enjoy it?)-
wanted an early return of his refund.
EXPLANATION: He jumped at the chance (too impetuously, 1 thought) to shoot the
rapids in his kayak.
The modifier that interrupts the main thought expressed by the
subject-verb combination may be more than merely words or
phrases. lt may be a full sentence or ev en a full question or excla-
mation. If it is a full sentence, do not put a period before the second ~ Use this pattern with restraint. Otherwise your reader may
dash unless the sentence is a quotation. If it is a question or an excla- think you have a "grasshopper mind" and never finish one thought
mation, however, you will need punctuation. A question mark or without interference from another thought.
an exclamation point may seem strange in the middle of a sentence,
but this pattern requires such punctuation.
The interrupting modifier need not always come between the
subject and verb; it may come in other places in the sentence (see
the last two examples below). And notice the different signaIs that
the punctuation gives the reader: parentheses really say that the
material enclosed is simply an aside, not very important; the dashes,
however, say that the interrupter is important to a full understartd-
ing of sorne word in the sentence.
EXAMPLES:
48
CAUTION: Don't dangle participles! Give them sornetnmlg
ta attach themselves ta. You will have no trouble with
them if you remember not ta "shift subjects" at
comma: the idea or persan you describe in the modi-
fying phrase, not sorne other pers on or ward, must be
the subject of your sentence. Inadvertent danglers some-
times result in unintentional humor or illogical state-
ments:
so
Francesca liked to occasionally wade
in the neighbor's pool.
52
THE RT OF STYlING SEN ENCES
Not aIl sentences need to start with the tradition al subject-verb com-
In the spdce below imita te this pattern and create some
J
bination or with a modifier obviously meant for the subject. For
sentences of your own. you may wish to invert the normal order by beginning a sentence with
sorne' kind of modifier out of its normal place; even complements and
direct objects may occasional1y precede the subject. These modifiers,
complements, and objects which you shift from their usual place may
be single words, phrases, or dependent clauses.
Be wary of any inverted pattern, however. It might lead to awk-
wardness if your writing is undisciplined. Inverting the natural order
should always result in a graceful sentence, not one that seems forced
or like an intention al gimmick. Just as every sentence should seem
natural, almost inevitable in its arrangement, so too must the one which
departs from tradition al sentence order. Try not to caB attention delib-
erately to any inversion; make it fit into the context gracefully. Aim for
sentences that possess the magic of variety, yes; but remember that too
much variety, too obviously achieved, may be worse than none at aU.
55
his Master's
JJ..J'-'''I-'J.'C'''' ln World Trade and .LJ'-'VU'JJl.H.L'-'''',
EXAMPLES:
For every season of the year there is sorne magic, sorne unique
delight.
56
Inversions are easy to do out of context, for exercise.
But in a setting with your other sentences, you need to take care
that sound natural, not forced or awkward. Therefore use
them sparingly, and th en for special emphasis.
EXPLANATION:
EXAMPLES:
58
westward fl.ew their are:ams. Mod V
for everyone the
milk and
between V
and S C
"The English Mail Coach" has a sentence
PATTERNS 15 and 15a: "But craven he was not: sud den had
EXPLANATION: been the caU upon him and sudden was his answer to the can."
The standard English syntax is From his years of suffering came eventual uncteI'stainctmg and com-
passion.
subject - verb
subject - verb - modifier
subject - verb - completer (direct object or subject ytf This pattern must never offend the ear by sounding awkward or
complement) . stilted.
Completely reversing the order of these sentence parts will
create an emphasis and a rhythm you can achieve in no other way: Test your sentence by reading it aloud. How does it sound?
verb - subject
Is it consistent with your tone? Does it fit neatly into the con-
modifier - verb - subject text?
completer - verb - subject.
This pattern will add spice to your prose; but like garlic or
cayenne pepper, too much can be overpowering. So restrain your-
self; don't overuse this pattern. It will probably fit better into
dramatic statements or poetic prose passages than into business let-
ters or laboratory reports.
EXAMPLES:
From the guru's prophecy radiated a faith that ultimately aIl would
be weIl.
Down the street and through the mist stumbled the unfamiliar
figure.
Even more significant have been the criticisms about the quaIity of
life in our affiuent society.
Westward the country was free; ModSVC
westward, therefore, lay their hopes; Mod V S
60
1 The Twenty Patterns
The more 1 eat chocolate fudge sundaes, the less enjoy ~tro:>uTh""''''''''7
shortcake and other desserts.
Kai and Ernst were two of my favorite ski instructors: the former
Not S but also S taught me downhill racing; the latter helped carry me to the
also may be hospital where Dr. Alexander set my fractured arm.
Just as S so too
be so also or
yJf' Remember that "pair" means "two." Be sure you have the
not S V at least S V second part of the construction; don't give the reader a signal sug-
The more the more V
gesting two items and th en provide only one. To say "Not only is
S S
she preHy" and then say no more is to leave your reader confused.
be the
The former S the latter S V MORE PAIRS: The following list of correlative conjunc-
tions might further aid you in developing this
pattern:
EXPLANATION: whether ... or so ... that
Sorne words work in pairs; for example, "either" takes an such ... that not only ... more th an that
"or"; "not only" takes "but also." These correlative conjunctions
both ... and as ... as
link words, phrases, or clauses which are similar in construction.
The patterns in the box above illustrate sorne common phrases neither ... nor not so ... as
used for paired constructions which may occur in simple or in com-
pound sentences. You will find this structure particularly helpful CAUTION: Put both conjunctions of the pair in a logical place
in making a comparison or a contrast. so that what follows each one will be parallel.
Whenever you use this pattern, remember to make both parts WRONG: The prisoner was found guilty
of the construction paraUe1; that is, make them both have the same
grammatical structure and rhythm.
ofmurder
(no parallel
t of robbery.
CORRECT: The prisoner was found guilty
EXAMPLES:
of robbery
Each man lives not only his personal life as a unique individual, :;::::::;::~ 1 1
'--_---lof mur der.
but also the life of his contemporaries and of his epoch. (parallel construction;
Just as wisdom cannot be purchased, so virtue cannot be legislated. r------,
better arder for climax, tao.)
As things had begun, so they continued. WRONG: 1 forgot my keys
Reluctantly, every dieter looks for a favorable verdict from his
;;::::::=~::: * my purse.
bathroom scale: if not a pound less, at least not a pound more. (no parallel verb)
CORRECT: 1 forgot my keys
62 1 1
my purse.
16a:
the space imitate this pattern and crea te some
sentences of your own.
EXPLANATION:
This type of paired construction - the simple contrast-
illustrates the differences between two ideas and usually involves a
reversaI. This simple contrast by reversaI may be dramatically
emphatic or may simply reenforce an ironie purpose. Unlike
PATTERN 16, this one does not involve the correlative conjunctions.
If you want to show a reversaI in the middle of your statement,
simply say something is "this, not that" or "not this, but that."
Punctuation marks - especially commas, dashes, or parentheses -
will help make a break in your sentence and establish your point
of reversaI or contrast.
EXAMPLES:
John could be a great dishwasher, but not a great chef.
She is a woman, but certainly no lady.
By just a quirk of fa te (not by deliberate choice) Columbus landed
in the Carribean, not the Gulf of Mexico; in the West Inilles,
not the East Indies.
Money - not love - was the reason the show girl married the
million aire.
BIarne Sara's poor manuscript on laziness, not fatigue.
We are not angry; simply disgusted and ready to quit.
(Note the ellipsis and the contrast.)
64
17:
many highly literate people continue to watch "situa-
tion comedies" on television] amazes
producers, even directors.
(subject of amazes)
IOf~penQent clause as
[That he was a werewolf] became obvious within a few moments
d.etJen.d.e11t clause as after his fingernails turned into claws.
(subject of verb became)
EXPLANATION:
As you learn to vary your sentence structures, alternating sim- Remember that the dependent clause can never stand alone;
ple ones and more complex ones, you will find this pattern especially it is only a portion of your sentence. Therefore don't put a period
helpful in achieving variety and style. Although this is a sophisti- before it or after it because you will create an awkward fragment.
cated pattern, it is (strangely enough) quite common in speech; For instance, these two examples are wrong:
it is easy to use in your written work, too, if you understand the
dependent clause that is merely a part of the independent clause. With horror she realized ihat he was a werewolf. Con-
firming her mother's low opinion of him.
The dependent clauses in this pattern, which serve as nouns, Juliet never realizes why her decision to drink the sleep-
will begin with one of the following words ing potion is irrational. Which explains why she
who, whom, which, that, what, why, where, when drinks it.
after which will come the subject-verb of the dependent clause. If
one of thèse introductory words 1S the subject, it will need only a How would you correct these errors?
verb after it.
EXAMPLES:
[How he could faU] is a mystery to me.
(subject of verb is)
He became [what he had long aspired to be.]
(complement after became)
[What man cannot imagine,] he cannot create.
(object of can create in this "inverted" sentence)
Juliet never realizes [why her decision to drink the sleeping potion
is irrational.]
(object of verb realizes)
66
Or you can work with . . . . . ", . . 0. • .,,+ participles:
The American economy, God will soon
normal.
His early efforts failing, tried a new '".""~1h.
n ..... to
ca1culus problem.
absolute construction If you wish, you may even use several participles and then contradict
a of dashes or palœntheses aIl of them with a contrasting adjective as the following sentence
illustrates:
Caesar continued his march through Gaul, his army
exhausted, hardened - but victorious.
What exactly is an absolute construction? It is a noun or pro-
EXAMPLES:
noun plus a participle with no grammatical connection to the in-
dependent clause. What's so absolute about it? Only its absolute The waIls being blank, the new tenant - an unemployed artist--
independence, its lack of any grammatical connection to the sen- promptly set about covering aIl of them in a mural of orange,
tence. At home in any part of the sentence, an absolute construction vermillion, and yellow.
is a separate entity and provides further information without modi- 1 plan to sail to Tahiti (my pension permitting) as soon as 1 retire
fying anything. Maybe these constructions are called "absolute" from this company.
because they are absolutely different from anything el se in English
We had our Memorial Day picnic after aIl, the rain having stopped
grammar; they are not dependent clauses because they have no
before sunset.
verbs, and they could never be independent clauses for the same
The crayons being aIl used up, Angelo stopped marking on the
reason.
newly painted table.
ABSOLUTE: His blanket being torn, Linus cried on Charlie
AU things considered, the situation seems favorable.
Brown's shoulder.
My fortune having been told by Madame Lazonga, 1 felt more at
DEPENDENT CLAUSE: Because his blanket was torn, Linus cried ease about my future.
on Charlie Brown's shoulder.
If carefully used, this pattern will be one of your most helpful CHECKPOINTS:
devices for varying sentence structure. If tossed into a sentence
cavalierly, it may create inexcusable awkwardness. Try not to force Because it has no grammatical connection with the senlen.ce.
this construction but look for places in your paragraph where it the absolute construction must always have sorne punctuation. Use
one comma after an absolute phrase at the first of the sentence or
would seem natural.
before one at the end. Such a phrase in the middle of the sentence
You may work with irregular participles (torn· and burnt must have a pair of commas or dashes or parentheses.
here) :
His blanket torn and his finger bumt, Linus cried on Charlie
Brown's shoulder.
68
1 The Twenty Patterns
EXAMPLES:
Days passed.
But then it happened.
AH efforts failed.
Just consider this.
70
These of made with are
? common in conversation than in formaI prose:
?
That's her mother?
?
You made an A in Esch's c1ass?
? James ftunked modern dance?
EXPLANATION:
~ Questions need to be handled carefully to be effective.
This pattern has two basic constructions: a question that begins
with an interrogative word, or a statement that becomes a question ~ A void scattering thern around willy-nilly just because they
through intonation (pitch or tone) of voice. are e~sy; rnak~ them serve sorne purpose, such as to arouse curiosity,
to stIrnulate mterest, to lead the reader into sorne specific idea
It is effective in several places: about your subject.
in the introduction to arouse the reader's interest;
as a topic sentence to introduce a paragraph;
within the paragraph to provide variety;
between paragraphs to provide transition;
at the end to provide a thought-provoking conclusion.
Look in these five places to discover where a question could
serve sorne desired effect in your writing. Provoke your reader with
staccato-like questions, wake him up, make him pause and think,
make him ask why or wherefore about your subject.
EXAMPLES:
72
Based on 10gic?
Where and when and why?
Upon what does wisdom finally depend? Vrl"rn~"i"lh7
the ability to know and understand - to see Th"."""r.h
EXPLANATION: sham.
The mere mention of the word "fragment" chills the blood of 1;:( for making exclamations and for emphasis-
What a price to pay!
grammar teachers; but a master stylist, ironically enough, often
relies on brief sentence fragments to give emphasis and a sense of AlI the se achievements before his twenty-third birthday!
immediacy to his prose. This deliberate fragment should create a The next step - martyrdom.
dramatic effect within your paragraph; it should serve sorne purpose. There is a price ta fame. The agonizing priee of self-
If it doesn't, don't use it. It would not be appropriate. Often only deniaI, the price of blood and sweat and te ars.
the context in which the fragment appears can tell you whether to
put it in or leave it out. U sed sparingly, the fragmen~ can be as
'* and sometimes in aphorisms or fragments of clichés-
effective as the rhetorical question or the short dramatlc sentence. The more the merrier for them, too.
Used injudiciousIy, it is simply another ineffective gimmick. Barly to bed!
A bird in the hand, old buddy. Remember?
EXAMPLES: Absolute power corrupting once more.
Try a fragment
1;:( in a description - .
1 wish you could have known the Southwest ln the early
days. The way it really was. The way the land seemed
ysr If you are in the habit of writing fragmentary sentences, don't
think that you have already mastered this pattern!
ta reach out forever. And those endless blue stretches of
sky! The incredible clarity of air whieh made distance an
ysr Like PATTERNS 19 and 19a, this one must be a deliberate
illusion. 1 wish 1 could make you see it so you would
styling device. It can never be merely an accident or a mistake in
understand my nostalgia, nostalgia and sorrow for a sentence structure or punctuation.
wonder that is no more.
1;{ for transition-
Now, on with the story.
But to get back to the subject.
So much for that.
Next? The crucial question to be answered.
t{ in structuring a question or an answer-
But how?
What then? Nothing.
74
Ted became what he had long aspired to be: a master of
and illusion, of hypnotism and tricks.
The series without a conjunction and the of a
combine weIl with the introductory " ....."''"'n.4-.~'~
any kind (PATTERNS 4, 9, 9a,
The generation which was too young to remember a · .... ,,, ..... ,,,-
sion, too young to remember World War too young
even ta vote - from that generation came America's
NOW you are ready to make sentences grow ... and grow sorne more. soldiers for Southeast Asia.
Now that you are familiar with sorne of the more comp1ex patterns 5. The compound sentence without a conjunction can combine with
in CHAPTER 2, 1et's combine two or more of them to create additional repetitions and series (PATTERNS 1, 4, 4a, 9)
variety in your sentences. Only a few ex amples of sentence combinations
Books of elegiac poetry had always stirred Jason; they made
appear in this chapter, but you will discover many more possibilities
him think of music, music that sang of ancient gloties,
as you experiment on your own, still remembering these cautions: always
of brave men, of the things they loved and hated and
try to write a sentence which fits into the total context; never force a
died for.
construction simply for the sake of variety.
6. I~troductory appositives may be written as dependent clauses,
Don't be afraid ta be creative. Experiment not only with your own
Wlth one of th~. clauses having a modifier out of place for emphasis,
favorite patterns from CHAPTER 2 but also with others, with new ones
and. the repetItlon of a key term followed by a question for dra-
you will discover in your reading or will create in your own writing
matlc effect (PATTERNS 6, 8, 9, 13, 19a)
by combining patterns as this chapter suggests. Wh en you learn to
Th~t there are t00 many people, that overcrowding causes
maneuver sentence patterns, when you fee1 at ease manipulating words,
then you will be a master of sentence structure if not yet a master stylist. problems both social and economic and political, that
hum an fellowship and compassion wear thin in such an
Now to discover what patterns combine well- environment - these are problems facing the inner city
today, problems which eventually man must solve. But
how will he ?
1. The compound sentence with a colon combines effectively with a 7. ~n inversion of the sentence pattern may also include a preposi-
series and the repetition of a key term (PATTERNS 3, 4, 9a) tlOnai phrase before the subject-verb combination within a com-
To the Victorians much in life was sacred: marriage was pound sentence (PATTERNS 1, 14, 15a)
sacred, women were sacred, society was sacred, the Around J ay were men of various nationalities; with none of
British empire was sacred. them could he ever really relate.
2. Repetition a1so combines weIl with a dependent clause as the in- A pair of dependent clauses as direct objects will work well with
terrupting modifier (PATTERNS 9 and Il) paired. words, a series without a conjunction, an interrupting modi-
The experiences of the past - because they are experiences fier wIth dashes, and a repetition of the same word in a
of the past - too seldom guide our actions today. construction (PATTERNS 4, Il, 9a, 16, 17)
3. A dependent clause as complement combines weIl with an apposi- The ~mbas~ador found that not only was America experienc-
tive at the end of a sentence after a colon and a series with balanced mg pamful expansion and costly social upheavals - over
pairs (PATTERNS 17, 10, 5)
78 E o S y ING SENTENCES Sentences Some More
foreign policy, racial disorder, economic - but reader - that will require you to shift down and backtrack, ad ding
also that the nation was facing the threat of a national modi~ers at differ~nt levels ta heip the reader comprehend fully the
paralysis of will, a paralysis of faith. meanmg you have m mind.
9. An interrupting modifier that is itself a sentence may go weIl with Study the examples below and notice how modifiers on different
another type of modifier (PATTERNS 11, lIa) levels. in the subject slot here help expand the sentence and clarify its
His family, a respected conservative family ruled mainly by meanmg.
several maiden aunts - his father had died when he was
a child - had been scandalized at the thought that their LEVEL ONE: the basic slots for any sentence (S- V)
young heir wanted ta devote his entire life ta hot-rad Whooping cranes fly.
racing and raller-derby competition.
10. After a long involved compound sentence without a conjunction, Now, on different levels add modifiers ta the subject.
a fragment with a repeated key ward and then a fragmentary ques-
tion may be very effective (PATTERNS 1, 4a, 9a, 20) LEVEL TWO (the first modifiers) : may come before or after sub-
ject:
The ecology-awareness movement aims at balance and whole-
ness and health in our environment; it wants ta assure a
proper place in the scheme of things for people, for
plants, and for animaIs. Not an exclusive place for either
one, just a proper place for aH. But how?
LEVEL THREE:
LEVEL FOUR:
Frequently writers find that a simple sentence with a single subject
and a single verb is tao brief or lean, that the meaning is not complete
LEVEL FIVE:
or as clear as it should be. What is missing is a modifier that will add
explanations, descriptions, specifie details, amplifications, supporting
LEVEL SIX:
materials to make the sentence clear and meaningful ta the reader. Thus,
in arder ta make his point clear, the writer adds ta his sentence. He
uses modifiers ta help the reader visualize; he illustrates the generaliza-
tion expressed in his basic sentence. These modifiers may be words, fly
phrases, clauses that appear at the beginning, the middle, or the end of unerringly.
the sentence; they may also modify one another.
Think of the basic idea, the primary simple sentence, as the first
level of writing and the modifiers added for clarity as the second or the
third or the fourth level of writing. Each successive lev el is related to the
one immediately above it and is related ta the basic sentence by the inter-
vening modifiers, sorne subordinating, sorne coordinating. Later on, as
you acquire more experience in writing, look for a generalization or an
abstract word in your sentence - clear ta you but possibly not ta your
ST N SENTENCES
The sky is like a blue tapestry. The Arkansas defense line-up was a
Casanova found his mistresses's eyes were noth- wall - impenetrable and
ing like the sun. (This simile also makes able.
an allusion to Shakespeare's Sonnet
The quarterback crossed the line into the
CXXX.)
Promised Land, giving Ohio State six
more points and a Rose Bowl win.
METAPHOR: A metaphor is an implied comparison. It is implied Harvard freshmen often think there should
because you do not say that something is "like" or "as" be an easier ascent up Parnassus than
another thing; you simply say that one thing IS some- . the one prescribed in the university
thing else. (A is B.) As with similes, here again, the catalogue.
two things being compared must be unlike things from
different classes. c. adjectives: Adjectives may also imply
comparisons; they describe
There are really two kinds of metaphors. something in terms that no
reader would ever take liter-
1. The "A equals B" kind uses two terms. ally.
The sky is a blue tapestry.
The dragonfly is a blue thread hovering Cynthia's feline movements clawed into
over the pool. Harold's composure. (Here, both
"feline" and "clawed" are metaphors,
2. The single-word metaphor can imply or sug- suggesting something cat-like about
gest a comparison. Cynthia.)
a. verbs: Almost any sports page will yield "Every slaughtered syllable is a kindness
a rich harvest of these verbs with to your reader," declared the lecturer
picture-making power. addressing the budding young jour-
The young rookie of the Milwaukee Bucks nalists.
skyrocketed to fame.
The quarterback blasted through the line Don't "mix" your images in a metaphor. Look at
of Nebraska's defense. these ghastly creations!
The fans came unglued and jumped up in
a frenzy of excitement. They stepped forth into the sea of matrimony
and found it a very rocky road.
b. nouns: The image or picture of com-
parison comes implied in a noun The "ship of state" might be off its keel; it might
which names one thing by calling sink or flounder or get off course without a
it another; for example, see the firm hand at the helm, but it could never bog
word "harvest" in the sentence down in a storm of red tape or be the leader
explaining verbs above. of the team or surge ahead in second gear.
84 HE F S
81
H T
SENTENCE SENTENCE
PATTERNS PATTERNS
eastward, shutting off the oases along the Pecos, the - and countless acres of prickly pear and lech-
Hueco mountains merge with the pine-cloaked Sac- uguilla and rabbit brush.
ramentos, and these give way to Sierra Blanca and harsh, forbidding country, appalling to new-
Jicarilla, with 12,OOO-foot Sierra Blanca Peak soar- corners from gentler regions. But it has its moments
ing in naked majesty over a11. of intense beauty. Sunrise and sunset are magic
The Tularosa country lies between the ranges, times. Vnder a full moon, that lonely, whispering
a great pocket of sand, sun, and sparse vegetation waste is transformed into an austere corner of fairy-
thirty miles wide, more or less, and over two hundred land. The belated traveler catches his breath when
miles long. The J umanos Mesa, named for a long- the tender fingers of dawn pick out the tiny black
vanished tribe of Indians, gives it a northern boun- shapes of the pine trees far above him on the top of
dary. To the south it merges with the Chihuahua the Sacramentos. One does not forget the Organs
Desert which pushes far down into Mexico. blackening against the sunset, swathed in a veil of /2.
Se en from the tops of the screening ranges, it lilac shadows - the eerie gleam of the white sands
looks like a fiat, gray-green, sun-fiooded expanse of at moonrise - a swarthy cloud dissolving in a col- \2-
nothing, impressive only because the eye can travel a umn of rain, the froth of impact showing white at its 1
hundred miles and more in one leap. Near at hand foot while aU round the sun shines serenely on.
. it is full of surprises. The northern end of the valley The yucca is a thorny and cantankerous object,
is a little less parched. Grass still grows ta11 on Car- but in the spring it puts up a ten-foot stalk which
rizozo Flat, and bean farmers have plowed up the explodes in a mass of creamy-white blossoms. And
country around Claunch. Nearby, two prehistoric 13 so it is with other sullen citizens of the de sert when
lava fiows cover the land with an appalling jumble of their time comes: the prickly pear with its rich yellow 10
volcanic rock known locally as the malpais. fiower, the desert willow dripping with pendent pink
South of the lava fiows, the vast gypsum de- and lavender, little pincushion cacti robing themselves
posits called the White Sands spread out in a deathly, in mauve petaIs more gorgeous than roses, the oco-
glittering world of pure white which edges eastward tillo shrouding its savage spines in tiny green leaves
a few inches every year, threatening in a few millen- 12 till its snaky arms look like wands of green fur, each
nia to swa110w up everything as far as the Sacra- one tipped with a long finger of pure scarlet.
mentos. It is big country - clean country - and if it
Sometimes the valley fioor heaves in sand dunes; has no tenderness, it has strength and a sort of
sometimes it breaks into red hummocks, each one magnificence.
crowned with the delicate green leaves and lethal To live there has always been a risky business
thorns of a mesquite bush. There are broad swales - a matter not only of long chances and short shrifts
where the yuccas grow in groves -leprous alkali but also of privation and danger. This was true of
fiats where even the sturdy greasewood can barely the prehistoric cave dwellers who lived only a little
hold its own - long inclines of ta11 grama grass better than their animal neighbors in the Huecos
where the foothills rise to the knees of the mountains many centuries gone by. It was tIue of the little
90 HE G E C S
SENTENCE SENTENCE
PATTERNS PATTERNS
pueblo commumtles which grew up later in the were higher and better supplied. Spring-fed streams
mountain canyons and wherever a wet-weather lake came down from the Sierra Blanca at Three Rivers
made existence possible on the valley floor. lt was while Tularosa Creek descended the pass betwee~
true in historic -times of the peaceful Christian lndians Sierra Blanca and Sacramento beside the main trail
who abandoned their unfinished church at Gran from the Pecos to the Rio Grande.
Quivira when the Apaches overwhelmed them nearly Farther south, where the mile-high cliffs of the 13
three hundred years ago. Sacramentos soar above the plain, a number of can-
Yes, it has always been hard country - frontier yons drained off the water from the heights - Dog IO~
country - and for obvious reasons, the first reason Canyon and Agua Chiquita; Sacramento and Grape- S-
being those same Apaches. The slopes of the Sierra vine. In Sacramento Canyon and in Dog Canyon the 14-
Blanca were their favorite haunts as far back as we water. was more or less permanent. But everywhere,
have any records, and though they ranged far and until the skill and cupidity of man turned the liquid
wide over the de sert and even moved to Mexico for go Id to account, it flowed out onto th~ flats a pitifully
decades when the Comanches descended upon them, short distance and disappeared in the sand. Along
they always came back to the mountain rivers and with it, as the years passed, flowed the blood of 150..
the ta11 pines. A merciless environment made them many a man who gave up his life for a trickle of
tough and almost unbeatable fighters. They kept water.
their country to themselves as long as they were able, Sensible men, cautious men, stayed away from
waging a never-ending war against hunger and thirst, 5 such a place. But the adventurous and the hardy
Comanches and Mexicans, soldiers and settlers, until and the reckless kept on coming. Each one had a
their power was broken less than a lifetime ago. dream of sorne sort - water for his cows, solitude
Highways and railroads were slow in coming for his soul, gold to make him rich. For ev en the
to a region so far removed from the gathering places Tularosa country has its treasures. The ghostly ruins
of men and money. Sheer isolation did what the of Gran Quivira have been honeycombed by men
Apache was not able to do alone: it held off the 3 obsessed with the not.ion that the lndians buried a
traders and developers for years while the Rio Grande hoard of gold before they left. At the northeast
and Pecos settlements were booming. corner of the valley, in the Jicarilla Mountains, lies
But the most potent force of aIl for keeping the abandoned gold camp of White Oaks, the site 1Sa...
people out was plain, old-fashioned, skin-cracking of rich mining properties seventy years ago. Midway
drought. The rainfall was imperceptible, and there between El Paso and Alamogordo, on the rocky
was just enough ground water available to cause slopes of the J arillas, Orogrande sits solitary, remem- 12.
trouble. On the valley floor there was next to none bering the days when prospectors and miners
at all until men got around to drilling wells. A few swarmed in; and a few miles away at the San
springs existed here and there in the Organs and the Augustin Pass the abandoned shafts at Organ tell
San Andres, none of them big enough to supply more a similar tale.
than a few men and beasts. The eastern mountains But the real story of Tularosa is the story of
SENTENCE
PATTERNS PATTERNS
Texas cattlemen - drifting herdsmen who began tame. Their sons and daughters still live among us -
to invade the valley in the early eighties, fine people, too - and their still frown on
their stern folkways with them. They too ran into loose discussion.
trouble, for their law was not the law of the Mexicans For these reasons this is not an easy story to
or the Indians or the Yankees who arrived during tell, but it is time someone told it. So let's go back
and after the Civil War. It was those proud riders to the beginning, before the Texas cattle crowded in,
who kept the Old West alive in that lonely land until ate the grass down to the roots, and trampled the
yesterday. It was the clash of their ways and stan- plain inta dust back to the days when the country
dards with the ways and standards of the settled was the way God made it: bunch grass growing up
citizens which caused the feuds and killings and to a horse's belly; miles of yellow flowers in the wet
hatreds that make up the unwritten history of the years; little rainwater lakes at the foot of the Organs
region. The Apaches and the climate and the lay of and the San Andres, long since dried out and buried 12
the land helped. But in the last analysis it was the in dust; sun and sand and sixt Y long miles to town.
Texans who made Tularosa the Last of the Frontier
West.
Those times seem as remote from present-day
reality as the wars of Caesar and Charlemagne, but
they have left a brand on the soul of many a man
and woman still living. That is why this story has
never been fully told - why aIl of it can never be
toId. For out here in the desert the West of the old
days has never quite given way to a newer America.
Customs have changed, but attitudes have held fast.
To test this fact, try asking questions about certain
people and events. Old men clam up and change the
subject. Young ones who have heard something
hesitate a long time before telling what they know
about the sins and tribulations of their grandfathers.
Once it was dangerous to talk about these things.
Even now it is not considered wise. The fears and
loyalties and customs of yesterday - these things
still cast their shadows on us who live on the edge
of the desert. On the streets of El Paso or Las Cruces
or Alamogordo you can still hear the click of boot-
heels belonging to men who played their parts in
*Reprinted by permission of The Devin-Adair Company.
dramas which would make a Hollywood movie look <01960 by C. L. Sonnichsen, Chapter 1, "Tough Country,"
Tu/arasa.
THE ART OF 5 LING TE E
94
SENTENCE
PATTERNS
the resignation to disappointment. And he aIso voiced
the new generation's longings - for fulfillment in ~".t-'"'-'.lH
the rl11-1-""1"',"'11 '"''
experience, for the subordination of seIfish impulses sentence with a s~;rnl:COLlvH and one with a
to higher ideals, for a link between past and future, What is the specific the second
for adventure and valor and honor. What was for- clause?
bidden were poses, histrionics, the heart on the What kind of verb must be
sleeve and the tongue on the cliché. What was re- 2 second clause before you can omit it?
quired was a tough, nonchalant acceptance of the
Can you ever omit something other than
harsh present and an open mind toward the unknown verb in an elliptical construction?
future.
4--8 3. What kinds of things can be 1isted in series?
This was Kennedy, with his deflationary war-
time understatement (when asked how he became a What s10ts in the sentence contain series?
hero, he said, "It was involuntary. They sank my Explain the patterns and the punctuation for
boat"); his contempt for demagoguery (once during the different kinds of series.
the campaign, after Kennedy had disappointed a In PATTERN 6, what two things come Imme:Cll-
Texas crowd by his New England restraint, Bill Att- ately after your series of appositives?
wood suggested that next time he wave his arms in
5. Why must the series in PATTERN 7 be set off
the air like other politicians; Kennedy shook his head by a pair of dashes?
and wrote - he was saving his voice - "I always
swore one thing rd never do is - " and drew a pic- What other marks of punctuation might occa-
sionally substitute for those dashes?
ture of a man waving his arms in the air); his free-
dom from dogma, his appetite for responsibility, his 6. In what two particular places in an essay would
instinct for novelty, his awareness and irony and PA TTERN 8 be good ta use? What should go
control; his imperturbable sureness in his own pow- into the dependent clause?
ers, not because he considered himself infallible, but 16 7. What other patterns could perform the same
because, given the fallibility of aU men, he supposed function?
he could do the job as well as anyone else; his love 9
of America and pride in its traditions and ideals. 8. What qualifications should a ward have before
you put it in PATTERN 9?
9. What kinds of words and in what slots of the
9a sentence can you repeat the same ward in par-
alle1 structure?
10. What kind of construction must come after the
9 comma ta keep PATTERN 9 from becoming a
PATTERN 1 with a comma splice?
* Reprinted by permission of Houghton Miffiin Company.
©1965 by Arthur M. Schelesinger, Jr., A l'housand Days,
pp. 113-115. 97
THE R s G S ENCE
98
PATTERN
PATTERN NUMBERS
NUMBERS
11. Write one sentence three times, using different 12 How can you avoid a dangling here?
punctuation marks before the appositive (com- 13 22. What kind of modifier needs a comma after it
10 & 10a ma, dash, colon). Then explain the difference in PATTERN 13?
emphasis which the punctuation creates. Which 14 24. What purpose might lead you to invert a sen-
is Ieast emphatic? Which is most emphatic?
tence?
Which makes a longer pause? Which is most 15 23. What does "inverted sentence" mean?
formaI and prim?
15 25. What items in the normal order of a sentence
12. What besides a single word can be an apposi-
may come out of their normal place (i.e., be in-
tive? verted)?
13. a. What is the difference in the construction 15a 26. What cautions must you observe to make your
following the colon in PA TTERN 3 and
inversions successful?
PATTERN 10?
16 27. What kind of phrases (words) always come in
b. What is the difference in the construction
following the dash in PATTERNS 9 and 10a? pairs?
16 28. What kind of statement will this pattern
7a& Il 14. Explain the difference between an internaI ap-
you to make?
positive and an interrupting modifier.
17 29. What kind of "signal words" herald the begin-
Il 15. In PATTERN Il, what two main parts of the sen-
tence are separated by this interrupting modi- ning of dependent clauses that may function as
subject or object or complement?
fier?
30. Write two sentences using the same dependent
Il 16. What three marks of punctuation can separate
clause. In one sentence, make the dependent
this modifier from the rest of the sentence? Can
clause the subject; in another, make it the direct
you ever use just ONE of these marks?
object.
17. Write the same sentence three times. Punctuate 18 31. Describe an absolute construction; name its two
it with a pair of commas, a pair of dashes, and
parts. Can it ever be a complete sentence?
a pair of parentheses; th en explain the difference
18 32. What is the difference in this pattern and the
in sound and emphasis in each.
one with an introductory or concluding modi-
lIa 18. Write a sentence that functions as an interrupt- fier?
ing modifier in another sentence. 18 33. If the absolute construction occurs in the middle
lIa 19. Write a question as an interrupting modifier. of the sentence, what must your punctuation be?
Where does the question mark go? 18 34. Can absolute constructions ever occur in pairs
20. Where do participles come from? How are they or in series?
12
always used? What different kinds of endings 19 35. What is the difference in PATTERN 19 and the
may they have? ordinary kind of short simple sentence?
PATTERN PATTERN
NUMBERS NUMBERS
internaI series
inde pendent clauses joined
<UVU.':;:'l.H or
but, for, or, nor, so, yet)
V'-'-"V~;'UÂ'VU''''cu ,-,-,,,uH,Hl". often for ,",H,qJLJlUL?lL?
elements in a series
3. contrasted elements in a this, not that construction mten'UDltmJ! modifiers and for dramatic
direct quotation from such constructions as He said, She an-
swered, etc. to enclose words, phrases, or expressions that have no ,""or,~<_'_
5. elements in dates, addresses, place names upon the main idea (to make asides or "whispers" to the
6. long introductory phrase or an adverbial clause preceding the reader)
main clause
NOTE: Like commas and dashes, parentheses may occasional-
7. an inverted element
ly be used a1so:
any elements that might be misread or which might otherwise
8. 2. to enclose an interrupting series
seem to run together
important omissjons, elliptical constructions
3. to enclose an appositive
9.
absolute constructions at the beginning or the end of a sentence 4. to enclose an interrupting modifier between subject - verb
10.
PERlon
a to enclose
1. at the end of a declarative sentence
1. any interrupting construction between subject and verb, verb
and object or complement, or any two elements not normally 2. after abbreviations
separated MARK
2. an appositive
1. at the end of a direct question
3. nouns or pronouns of direct address
2. after each question in a series
non-restrictive (not essential) interrupting modifiers
Where are the jewels? the crown? the rings? the tiaras?
5. absolute constructions within sentences
3. in parentheses to express uncertainty
6. any parenthetical expression within sentences In 1340 (?) Chaucer was born.
EXCLAMATION POINT
1. at the end of sentences with strong exclamations or commands,
those that show strong emotion
2. after strong interjections
MARKS
1. periods and commas ALWAYS GO INSIDE QUOTATION
MARKS!
2. colons .• andsemicolons ALWA YS GO OUTSIDE QUOTA-
TION MARKS!
3. question marks and exclamation points go inside or outside
depending upon the context of the sentence ,
4. enclose the actual words of a speaker
5. identify symbols, letters, words used as such (He has too CalI No:428.
many "but's" in this paragraph, and his "$" sign is a simple
"S.")
6. enclose the titles of short stories, poems, paintings, songs,
essays, chapters of books, BUT NOT book titles
.!-,
Iiisil. "~iI