Change can be scary, from being a student for several years to getting a job

where all the things I’ve learned and cultivated will be put into test. Fear and
doubt will always be present in me. No matter how prepared or framed I am, I will
always have moments of doubt and stress which affects my performance or how
I associate with people around me.

One of the fears I am dealing with is having this concern about my health and my
dad’s health. Experiencing illness regularly gives you this impression of fear on
what is next and how intense it will be. And time will always be running, my
father isn’t going any younger and all the time away from him means lesser time
I’ll be spending appreciating and acknowledging what he has done for me. I gave
this fear greater concern because I don’t have complete control on this and at
any moment, something inevitable can happen.

Doubts about myself will always be an issue. There are few instances lately
where I am mentally and emotionally crippled just because I lack faith on my
own capability and capacity. I fear that if I were to step out to employment,
these doubts will devastate me again.

Finally, I fear to be employed into a toxic and unhealthy workplace. I desire to

work in a place where there is a positive workplace culture, a place in where
people help each other and a place where encouragement and support are
always displayed. And because of this fear, I am working hard to make myself a
healthy companion too, since I observed and heard feedbacks that I have
tendencies to becoming a toxic associate.