I am not aware if there is a specific ritual on the 13th day after death.

In Kerala (in my
community[Nairs],at least), we have specific after-death rituals only on the third day and on the
sixteenth day after death, besides the daily bali tharpanam that is.

The after death rituals are mainly done for two aspects…

For the Body (shareeram)

For the Soul (atma)

In our community, it is said that the body should not be allowed to undergo decay and hence it is
to be cremated (dahanam) within 12 hours after the person passes away. The daily bali
tharpanam is conducted from the next dayonward.

On the third day after cremation, the left-over bones from the cremation site are collected and
after some other associated rituals, they are ceremoniously deposited in a deep river or in the
sea. This is called asthi sanchayanam or just sanchayanam.

The dahanam and the asthi sanchayanam rituals are for the salvation of the body. These have no
connection with the salvation of the atma.

On the sixteenth day, the function is much more elaborate. In the morning, we have the function
that is presided by an ilayathu wherein it is believed that the atma of the deceased person is
taken to Vaikuntham by the attendants of Lord Vishnu. During the period between dahanam and
the sixteenth day function, the atma is said to be moving step-by-step towards Vaikuntham,
accepting oblations from various celestial beings on the way. Until this time, the bali tharpanam
is believed to be the daily meal offered to the atma of the deceased soul, which has been
elevated to the position of pitrus after release from the earthly body. After the sixteenth day
function, the soul is said to have found its place back at the lotus feet of Lord Vishnu once again.
There is an elaborate feast on the same day. This is known as pathinaar adiyanthiram or just
adiyanthiram. This brings a close to the official period of strict mourning for the family of the
deceased, though the bloodline of the deceased person traditionally refrain from attending or
celebrating any religious festivities (Onam, Vishu, conducting weddings, etc.) for a year after the
death. In modern times, there are people who relax these customs to suit their ‘busy lifestyles’
and posing the age-old argument of ‘Who decides all these time frames? Where is all this
written down? We should change when times change!’ Nowadays, I have come across families
where the entire after death rituals are over within five days after the death of the person. Call
me old-fashioned…but I believe that if customs are being followed, they should be followed in
their entirety. Not in a way that is tailor-made to suit the people observing the customs.
·0 it is said in santana dharma that everything that is born dies or has an end and everything
that dies takes a rebirth. This is an inescapable cycle. Just as we go to sleep after indulging in
activity in the day time and in sleep we get rejuvenated and energised in order to begin one
more day afresh, with full energy and enthusiasm. Likewise is death, a process for energising
and coming back with new enthisiasm to do the newer and better activities. The Sixteen
Samskaras are.

·1 Garbhadhana--impregnation

·2 Pumsavana--Sanctification of the Embryo.

·3 Simantonnayana--Parting of hair of mother to be.

·4 Jatakarma--Sacrament of Birth

·5 Namakarna - Name Giving Ceremony

·6 Annaprasanna--First Grains

·7 Chudakarma - tonsure

·8 Karna Vedha--Piercing of ears.

·9 Vidhyaramba---Primary Education.

·10 Upanayanam--Thread Bearing Ceremony

·11 Keshanta--First time head shaving

·12 Samavratana--Graduation Ceremony

·13 Vivaha--Marriage

·14 Vanaprastha--Retiring for a life of tapas & Studies.

·15 Sanyas--Renounciation.

·16 Antyeshthi--Final Rites after death.

After the death is performed the final sacrament, then 16th sacrament. 1 - 15 sacrament include
the preparations which the parents make in order to provide the good environment to the soul
who would be taking birth as their child.

So, Conception is the first sacrament and after-death ritual is the final sacrament. These
Sacraments, thus begin before the birth of an individual and go on even after his death. All these
sacraments are meant to remove various hurdles in the progress of the individual and also to
speed up his evolution.

the 16th sacrament Contains certain rituals and rules to be followed by the family members of
the dead person, so that the process of his rest, his dwelling in the subtle planes and his
subsequent reincarnation are well taken care of.

A Jeeva, the incarnating soul, possesses three bodies, the physical or Stula, the subtle or
Sookshma and the casual or karana. Death Means the sepration of the physical body with rest of
the two bodies. After death, the jeeva goes to the Kama-loka or the desire-world in his subtle
body. Here the jeeva experiences the fruit of his sinful thoughts He considers, reflect and digests
such sinful thoughts and hence in the process experiences the regrets and sorrows
corresponding to such sinful thoughts and deeds. Then from here the jeeve passes to Swarga or
heaven with his casual or karana sarira. Here he experiences happiness corresponding to his
good deeds. After this period in swarga or heaven is over, he takes a new birth and the cycle thus
continues until he gets moksha or liberation.