Anna Kinney

April Cordova
COMM 1010
Self-Reflection: Myself as a Communicator

The first part of this project required me to analyze my own verbal and nonverbal

communication style, then think of ways to improve. Now that I have interviewed a few people, I

can compare their observations to mine. There were some similarities and differences. I really

wanted to get different opinions from someone who has known me my entire life, someone who I

have a working relationship with, and someone who knows me as well, but I only see maybe two

or three times per month. I interviewed my mother Denae, co-worker Janet, and friend Natalie.

How am I at articulating my needs, opinions, views or concerns? Naturally, my mom

had the most insight to this question. She said that I am do a good job at communicating, but I tend

to not do communicate right away. First, I need time to think about how I feel or what my ideas

are. This could might take a day, week, month, etc. Even though I might take some time my

communication is good and reasonable because I have put some thought into it. Then I am very

distinctly able to say what I feel. Also, I do not “beat around the bush” and that I am very succinct.

When it comes to needs, she says I can be passive and tend to not verbalize them as much because

I already know what I need. This might be attributed to my independent personality or introverted

personality. When it comes to my concerns, I am very calculated and at times do not verbalize

them, instead they ruminate.

Janet my co-worker had a little different perspective, although Janet and my mom did say

that I am direct in my communication when I need something. She says I express my views and I

am open to other points of views. When it comes to communicating information, if something

needs to be done immediately, I communicate without angst. Which helps because I am not adding

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to already stressful situation. Janet mentioned that I am good at expressing my opinions in a way

that isn’t overbearing and I don’t criticize.

How am I as a listener? Everyone had great comments on my listening skills. Natalie said

I am a very good listener. She is always surprised when I remember a specific detail from a

conversation we had a month or even a year ago. I remember specific details that she might have

forgotten herself. When I listen, I do a great job of paying attention and focusing on the

conversation. She knows this because I ask follow-up questions to clarify, so as to not jump to any

conclusions.

What aspects of my nonverbal behavior are effective? My mom said that when

communicating, I am straight and to the point, give great eye contact, and I face forward to the

speaker. Very rarely do I get distracted by outside distractions. What can be improved? She said

my nonverbal communication could be improved through my posture. I tend to slump down a little

bit, especially when I am tired. My mom let me know that my facial expressions and tone of voice

are probably my communication weaknesses. My verbal communication is great, but I can still be

hard to read because my face doesn’t show that I am into the conversation. It might help if I can

be more aware of my “poker face” and be more facially expressive. Also, it might helpful to show

more interest if my tone of voice fluctuated a little more. She also mentioned I tend to sit very still.

She said it might help if I am more animated in my movements.

What are my communication strengths? Going back to being a good listener, all three

of them said that listening is definitely my number one strength. Natalie said that she has noticed

that I am an extremely active listener. I do not jump to conclusions. She says she appreciates that

when she needs to vent, I am a good person to go to because I don’t try to solve problems, I just

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listen and not I am not to quick judgements. Janet said that do a great job of responding to

conversations with appropriate comments with appropriate timing

What are my communication weaknesses? I was happy to hear for the most part my

nonverbal behavior messages are pretty good, but I could tweak a couple of things. My mom did

not hesitate to let me know what of my nonverbal behaviors can be improved. She said when I am

tired, my listening skills deteriorate rapidly. At that point I do not want to listen anymore and that

I’m done. She gave the example that it wouldn’t matter who I was have a conversation with, even

if it was the president of the United States, when I’m tired, I will leave. I thought that was funny

comment because to a certain degree, it’s true! She said it might be helpful if I can try to mirror

the communicators energy to help improve my nonverbal communication.

What is it like to have a conversation with me? It was interesting to see the differences

in comments from each person for this question. Janet said she loves having conversations with

me because I am smart, caring, easy to talk to. She says it’s refreshing to have conversations with

me. My mother on the other hand said it depends on the day and my mood. (She meant it in the

most loving way of course.) When I am in a good mood and I’m having a good day it is fun to talk

to me. When all those things are not aligned, it can be difficult, and people sometimes might want

to avoid me because I might not be pleasant to speak with. I thought that was interesting. Natalie

said it’s easy to have conversations with me and I can be very approachable and relatable.

In doing this exercise, I have learned a few things that helped me understand better how

people think about how I communicate. The best takeaway is that I need to work on my nonverbal

communication the most. I can see how my facial expressions and tone of voice might show that

I am uninterested. It’s good to hear that I am a great listener but would like to work on my

nonverbal communication more to be a more well-rounded communicator. Although some of the

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feedback was hard to hear, for the most part, their feedback aligned with how I viewed myself. It

was very good to see how others though about me as a communicator.