Christine Nguyen

01/14/2019

Period: 3

Gender Synthesis Essay

During the early 1700s in China, a male figure is traditionally sent out to train and fight

in wars, while women and children stay at home. If the warrior returns home safely, his family

name is placed under his achievement; the man who proudly served his country. On the opposing

hand, those who stay at home, women, and children, create a stronger relationship with the

surrounding people; forming a stronger “sense of self” through their connections and

relationships. I agree with John Grey’s claim of, “A man’s sense of self is defined through his

ability to achieve...A woman’s sense of self is defined through feelings and relationships”,

quoted from Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus, as women cannot accomplish the

same achievements that men are entailed with since they are not given the same opportunity.

Men and women have always defined their “sense of self” on different ends of the

spectrum whether it may be through emotion or achievements. Similar to the article, I Want A

Wife by Judy Brady, where the author nudges on the fact that women are not given the same

opportunities as men. She begins to incorporate a list of what the perfect wife would do,

humorously listing off her tasks as a wife and mother. This proves that while men are out

working, women are grounded at home cooking and cleaning; taking care of everything that goes

on in the household, as stated, “I want a wife who will take care of my physical needs…” (Doc

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B). As the female figure is grounded at home she begins to shape her relationships and emotional

philosophy. This makes the women more valuable to her emotional attachments and not through

her social achievements. Ensuring that women are more emotionally driven than men.

As stated before, women are historically anchored at home where they have to take care

of all household activities. Alike the article, There Is No Unmarked Woman, written by Deborah

Tannen, where the author speaks on behalf of all women who are considered to be marked.

Women are known to be driven by their emotions or relationships altering their choice of style

when presented to the outside world. In the quote, “Then there was makeup...” (Doc D) reflects

that since a woman is emotional driven she is always marked, whether she may be wearing

makeup or completely natural.

On the opposing hand, men are primarily out and about working and accomplishing tasks

that many women are not given the opportunity to. Men portray their “sense of self” through

their social achievements, or their ability to achieve. In the novel, The Great Gatsby, written by

Scott Fitzgerald, encompasses a few quotes referring to Gatsby’s mansion. This interlinks it with

the achievements that Gatsby made for Daisy, such as his mansion and his attained wealth.

Gatsby’s “sense of self” emerges from the transition from a poor farmer to a wealthy man as this

displays his accomplishments over the years. For instance, the description of Gatsby’s mansion

proves how Gatsby’s accomplishments reflect on himself, “tower on one side, spanking new

under a thin beard of raw ivy…” (Fitzgerald, 5). As Gatsby is out working hard, he could achieve

his, “sense of self” through his social achievement and connections.

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 In the article, “The Myth Of A Latin Woman” written by Judith Ortiz Cofer serves to

explain the achievement of men and their “sense of self”. For instance, “...harassment that Puerto

Rican women endured where the “boss men” talked…” (Doc C) implies that the “boss men” are

taking advantage of the women who are working in the factories since they believe women have

been anchored at home without social knowledge. By speaking to women in a sexual tone,

entrusting that that is all they understand. The “boss men” have displayed their “sense of self”

through their social achievements by being given an opportunity that women do not have. In this

case, men are given the opportunity to work amongst other representatives from other places,

while the majority of women are stuck at home handling household business. For this reason,

many men assume that women have no social knowledge about reality outside of their home.

In conclusion, I agree with John Grey’s claim of, “A man’s sense of self is defined

through his ability to achieve...A woman’s sense of self is defined through feelings and

relationships”, quoted from Men Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus, as women cannot

accomplish the same achievements that men are entailed with since they are not given the same

opportunity. Women are known to be more emotionally driven due to their opportunities

compared to the male figure where social achievements drive men to accomplish more.