IGCSE PAPER 2 – REVISION TIPS,

NOTES, CAMBRIDGE EXAMINERS’

FEEDBACK AND EXEMPLARS
QUESTION 1 (DIRECTED WRITING TASK)

TRANSFORMING STIMULUS MATERIAL (PASSAGE) FOR

DIRECTED WRITING TASK:
The same detail will transform in different ways depending for the style you will be
writing in.

Take this detail: superstitious times in a village whose oldest inhabitant could
remember the plague, carried by vermin, which had wiped out three quarters of
their population.

Look how it changes depending on the style…

News Report: Only 80 years ago, 75% of Malsam’s population was killed in a similar
plague,it was also spread by rodents. The oldest inhabitant of the village, Jenny
Jackson 96, has now witnessed both disastrous events.
Letter: How terrible! This is the second time such a disaster has struck. Old Jenny so
gloomily told us how, when she was a child, three quarters of the town was killed by
an almost identical disease. Three quarters! Can you imagine living through two
such experiences?
Speech: It is undeniable this is a tragedy. I accept that. But, it is a tragedy we can
conquer, it is a tragedy that our ancestors in Malsam have conquered before. Three
quarters of our people were struck down years ago. One quarter rebuilt this town.
One quarter grew strong. They made us what we are today. Jenny here is living
proof of our survival. Can we not repeat this positive? Are we not strong like they
were?
Interview:
Interviewer: How does it feel to be watching history repeat itself?
Jenny: It’s….it’s…unimaginably hard. You see some things so terrible. You lose so
many friends. You only expect that to happen once, you know?
Interview: It is so hard.
Jenny: Malsam is a good town, with good people. The Duvalls seemed kind, but…

PHRASES FOR USE IN DIRECTED WRITING

You can use the following in persuasive or argumentative writing.
 Some people think… however this is not true because…
 It has been stated that… but this is not true because…
  In addition it has been claimed… but this is incorrect because…
 It would be useful to consider… In my experience…
 What would the consequences be…?
 What would happen if…
 By far the best solution would be…
 Do we really want to…
 It is frightening to think that…
 We need to make sure that…
 I have no doubt at all that…
 Imagine what would happen if…
 How would you feel if…?
 I am sure you will agree that…
 There can be only one conclusion…
 The most important aspect…
 Sometimes…
 On the other hand…
 Firstly…
 Secondly…
 Nevertheless…
 On balance…
 Furthermore..
 Moreover…
 Despite the view that…
 Research shows that…
 The evidence clearly shows that…
 Another factor to be considered is…
 Opponents declare… but…
 I believe…
 I strongly believe…
 I am certain…
 It is clear that…
 There is clear evidence that…
 Having considered both sides of the argument is it clear…

GUIDE TO WRITING AN INFORMAL LETTER

 When you are writing an informal letter or sending an email to a friend, it
is very important for the examiners to try and make it sound friendly and
chatty.
 Add a few bits of personal chat, usually at the start of the letter, to make it
seem genuine
 Make sure main part of letter relates to task and that you use appropriate
tone.
 Don’t be bright and cheerful if writing to pass on bad news.
 Do not use ‘text’ speech eg ” Hey Bobby! how r u?” or “I got a present 4 u”
 Do not use slang e.g. ‘gonna’ or ‘cos’
 Use contracted verb forms like we’ve, I’m, etc.
  Use short sentences and active verb forms.

USEFUL PHRASES
 Dear ….Best wishes…;Yours faithfully…; I am sorry to inform you that…; I am
very grateful for… Why don’t we… I will not be able to attend the…; Give my
regards to…; I look forward to hearing from you…; Let me know as soon as…
I’m really sorry I…We had a little bit of luck…
 Some useful expressions to begin an informal letter
 Thank you for your letter which I received yesterday. I was pleasantly
surprised to hear from you. It was wonderful to hear from you after so long.
Thank you for your letter. I was pleased to hear that you are in good health.
It was really nice hearing from you. I am glad that you like your new school.
 Some useful expressions to end an informal letter
 I promise to write to you soon. I hope you will reply soon. Give my best
wishes to your parents. I am looking forward to seeing you. I look forward to
hearing from you.

GUIDE TO WRITING PERSUASIVE SPEECHES

Purpose of Speech
Speeches are usually formal spoken presentations for a particular purpose—often to
persuade an audience to support an idea, or to explain or describe an interesting
topic or past event.

An effective speech

 engages the audience straight away through personal reference or surprising

information.
 uses humour, powerful ideas, imagery, rhetorical questions and repetition to
make a point.
 uses a range of sentence lengths for effect
Successful Persuasion
Successful persuasive language appeals to:

1. LOGIC Reasoning is clear and consistent. Logic may be real or false (i.e. giving
the appearance of logic)
2. PERSON Know and understand the audience. Knowledge of personal
motivations and history can be used to good effect.
3. EMOTION Use emotional appeal, highly emotive words, images, and colours
to stir an effective response.
Structure of a persuasive speech/ speech
Opening:
 Captures audience’s attention;
 Start with yourself and why you are speaking.
 Include an interesting fact or item of information.
 Clearly state your opinion.
Body
 Developing your ideas;
 Using questions to engage listeners.
 Your argument.
 Acknowledgement of the other argument/ opinion.
Conclusion
 Summarise your speech.
 Conclude the speech memorably.
 Useful words:
 Adverbs: evidently; understandably; reasonable; undoubtedly; clearly;
finally; strongly; adamantly
 Verbs: to challenge; to oppose; to question; to implore; to urge; to condemn;
to propose; to support
 Adjectives: Vital; important; essential; biased; dishonest; inappropriate;
controversial; brave; foolish
 Transitional words and phrases: In addition,…; Furthermore,…; Above all… It
goes without saying…; Of course,…; Decidedly…; Undoubtedly…; Indeed…;
In fact… Specifically,…; More importantly,… Yet,… ; However,… In
summary…
 Useful phrases:
 This needs to be dealt with…; Some people feel that…; How could you
possibly…; What would happen if…; This would mean that…; Is it really
worth…/ Do you really think…; Just think about…; I believe that…; Although
not everybody would agree, I want to argue that…; There are several points I
want to make to support my point of view. Firstly…; I have several reasons
for arguing for this point of view. My first reason is…; Therefore, although
some people argue that…; think that I have shown that…; We can solve this
by…; If these plans go ahead…
 Read the following speech identify the persuasive techniques (personal
pronouns, alliteration, fact, opinion, rhetorical questions, repetition, emotive
language, statistics, rule of three)

Ladies, Gentleman and Children, lend me your ears!

I am here today to express my utter disgust at the so called ‘sport’ of

fox hunting.

Some of these rich, posh, toffee-nosed public school boys in tights say
that shooting foxes does not always kill the fox outright and that
hunting with dogs is actually more humane. However, that could not
be further from the truth. Fox hunters chose foxes purely for puerile
pleasure; not because they want to help farmers. Indeed, the Royal
Society for the Prevention of Cruelty to Animals reported a case of a
twelve year old girl and her ten year old brother being traumatised at
the sight of a fox being torn limb from limb by a pack of blood-thirsty
hounds. Does this sound like humane pest control to you?
 Furthermore, being hunted by a wild pack is not a humane way to die.
Statistics show that 92% of foxes killed in the hunt have a longer, more
agonising death than these killed by more traditional methods of pest
control.

Stop the murder,stop the violence, stop fox hunting!

FEATURE/ MAGAZINE ARTICLE GUIDE

 These are creative texts that deal with real life events and issues.
 The emphasis in these articles is on the people, ideas and views, not just
facts.
 Feature articles have a more personal tone than news reports and can
include the writer’s opinion on a topic.
 Often writer’s are passionate about the subject.
 Portrays a slice of life or pushes a topic to make a bigger point.
 Feature articles rely on interviews and give the opinions of different people
as well as the facts.
 Feature articles use secondary sources that support the writer’s view:
interviews,anecdotes and statistics.
 Feature articles do not always have a serious tone, unlike news reports.
 Types of feature articles: human-interest, personality, news feature, how-to
and past events.
 Feature articles are timeless. They can be about something that happened a
long time ago, or an ongoing issue.
 Doesn’t rely on short sentences. Uses complex sentences and relative
clauses.

STRUCTURE
 Headlines. These should be catch but informative and in the present tense.
 Byline. The name of the writer.
 Interesting lead. Grabs attention.
 Leads can be: narrative, descriptive, a startling statement, a twist or
compare and contrast.
 Billboard. What the story is about. (any of the who, what, where, when, how
information that you have not covered in the lead.)
 Sub-topics. Each paragraph tells a different part of the sentences. You
should use transitional sentences to link paragraphs.
 Memorable conclusion. Brings a sense of resolution. Summarise the article,
express your opinion, leave the reader with something to think about.
 Final sentence. A memorable quotation or statement that looks to the
future.
Persuasive texts encourages the reader to do something.
 You can use language devices in your persuasive or argumentative
responses. A quick way to remember some of these devices in P in A
FOREST.
 P= Personal Pronouns
 A= Aliteration
 F= Facts
 O= Opinions
 R= Rhetorical Questions/ Repetition
 E= Emotive Language
 S= Statistics
 T= Triplets (Rule of Three)

PAPER 2. QUESTION 1. EXAMINER TIPS

 This is a genre transformation question, and you will be required to show
awareness of style characteristics, persona, and audience. Put yourself into
role, and address your audience directly.
 There will almost certainly be two texts, perhaps in different genres e.g. a
letter and a dialogue. The question will require you to assimilate information
from both texts so you must not ignore one of them.
 Your answer will not be in the same genre as either of the texts, and should
therefore be in a different style from both of them, and all material from the
passages must be modified to suit the new genre.
 The recommended structure for the response will be offered in the wording of
the question, and should be followed. To quote from the principal examiner’s
report: ‘Candidates should always bear in mind the importance of structure
and a sense of audience is an exercise such as this’.
 You will try to use as much of the passages as possible, as it will all be relevant
(unlike in paper 2 q.1) but you will have to change the way you express it; for
instance a dialogue between friends would become reported speech in
another genre, or just an opinion indirectly referred to.
 Do not write as yourself unless you are specifically told to do so.
 There will be at least two factors to focus on, e.g. advantages and
disadvantages. You will need to make two lists before you start in order to
make sure you have enough material for both sides of the question.
Examiners will use A and B, or pros and cons, in the margin to identify points
on each side and to assess the balance of the two.
 The third element of this question is evaluation; you will have to decide which
of several options is better and present reasons why you have formed this
opinion and justify it.
 Make strong transitions between points/paragraphs e.g. ‘Yet another reason
to support this proposal is…’
 Do not get distracted by peripheral issues; for instance if you are asked how
money should be spent, don’t discuss the fund-raising methods.
  The opening needs to clearly introduce the situation and purpose of the task,
and will be rewarded if it puts the reader in the picture.
 Though you cannot make up things which are not in the passages, you should
try to use your own ideas in the way that you extend those of the passages,
provided that they are ‘based on the reading material’.
 The aim of the response is likely to be persuasive, and paragraphs should be
linked appropriately for the structure of a progressive argument.
 Remember to be consistent in your adoption of style and voice, and keep in
mind the purpose of the piece of writing. Use rhetorical or other persuasive
devices if appropriate to the task.
 Do not be overly casual in what is a formal piece of writing. Even if it is for
your peers in a school magazine, written language for publication is less
colloquial than spoken language.
 On the other hand it would not be appropriate to adopt a pedantic style
containing specialised vocabulary for the task of communicating opinions
clearly and persuasively.
 The ending needs to be definite and provide an effective and satisfying
conclusion to the piece.

NARRATIVE HOOKS
Don’t forget a good hook at the beginning of your narrative.
The first few lines of any piece of writing are essential because they set the tone
and, hopefully, make the reader want to read on. This is known as a ‘hook’.

The first line should leave the reader asking a question.

This question should invite the reader to keep reading. (These techniques can also
be used to start your paragraphs)

Here are some techniques for writing hooks and some examples:
Description of character:
Most really pretty girls have pretty ugly feet, and so does Mindy Metalman, Lenore
notices, all of a sudden. The Broom of the System by David Foster Wallace

Description of setting:
The hottest day of the summer so far was drawing to a close and a drowsy silence
lay over the large, square houses of Privet Drive. Harry Potter and the Order of the
Phoenix by JK Rowling

Action
Peter crouched over the fire, stirring the embers so that the sparks swarmed up like
imps on the rocky walls of hell. Count Karlstein by Phillip Pullman

Dialogue
“I’m going shopping in the village,” George’s mother said to George on Saturday
morning. “So be a good boy and don’t get up to mischief.” George’s Marvellous
Medicine by Roald Dahl
Question
Ever had the feeling your life’s been flushed down the toilet? The Toilet of Doom by
Michael Lawrence

A statement
It’s a funny thing about mothers and fathers. Even when their own child is the most
disgusting little blister you could ever imagine, they still think that he or she is
wonderful. Matilda by Roald Dahl

Here are some other famous examples. Identify which one you like and why.
 Happy families are all alike; every unhappy family is unhappy in its own way. –
Leo Tolstoy, Anna Karenina
 It was a bright cold day in April, and the clocks were striking thirteen. –
George Orwell
 Stately, plump Buck Mulligan came from the stairhead, bearing a bowl of
lather on which a mirror and a razor lay crossed. – James Joyce, Ulysse
 It was a dark and stormy night; the rain fell in torrents, except at occasional
intervals, when it was checked by a violent gust of wind which swept up the
streets (for it is in London that our scene lies), rattling along the house-tops,
and fiercely agitating the scanty flame of the lamps that struggled against the
darkness. – Edward George Bulwer-Lytton, Paul Clifford
 Once an angry man dragged his father along the ground through his own
orchard. “Stop!” cried the groaning old man at last, “Stop! I did not drag my
father beyond this tree.” – Gertrude Stein, The Making of Americans
 It was the day my grandmother exploded. – Iain M. Banks, The Crow Road
 Miss Brooke had that kind of beauty which seems to be thrown into relief by
poor dress. – George Eliot, Middlemarch
 “Take my camel, dear,” said my Aunt Dot, as she climbed down from this
animal on her return from High Mass. – Rose Macaulay, The Towers of
Trebizond .
 Granted: I am an inmate of a mental hospital; my keeper is watching me, he
never lets me out of his sight; there’s a peephole in the door, and my keeper’s
eye is the shade of brown that can never see through a blue-eyed type like
me. – Gunter Grass, The Tin Drum

PAST TENSE IN NARRATIVE WRITING

NOTE: THE DIALOGUES ARE WRITTEN ON NEW LINES

Read this narrative and take note of how the writer has kept the narrative in the past
tense, you should to the same.

I arrived in Seattle on a cold, rainy night in October. As I stepped off the train
and heard the door close behind me, I suddenly realised I had left my purse in the
overhead compartment. This stupid event was the latest in a series that had
plagued me all day, suggesting I should have just stayed in bed.
Cursing myself under my breath, I trudged along the rain-soaked street looking for
a payphone. Finally, six blocks later, one appeared in front of a market to my left. I
fumbled in my pocket for some change and the number I had written on a scrap of
paper before leaving my apartment twelve hours before. Luckily, the phone wasn’t
as grungy as I had expected it to be, so I dropped my quarters in the slot
and waited for that familiar voice.
“Hello?”

“Sis, it’s me.”

“Good gracious, are you all right? I’ve been worried sick!”

“I’m not great, but I’m here. Can you come get me?”

“Before you can hang up, I’ll be there.”

I had been sitting there only a few minutes when she sped around the corner
and skidded to a stop in front of the phone booth. The car was battered and cold,
but I would have happily jumped into a manure truck at that point. I huddled in my
seat and shivered, waiting for her to ask the question I knew she would.

NARRATIVE COMPOSITION EXAMPLE

Below is James’ narrative from the prelim exam.
She was gone longer than she was supposed to and she walked back as fast as she
could.

“What took you so long?” I questioned out of aggravation.

“I’m sorry dad, I guess I drank too much lemonade!” she jokingly exclaimed.

“Stop it Olivia, I need you to focus and be quiet. I’m teaching you how to hunt and I
want you to take this seriously.” I clarified as she nodded submissively.

We trekked deeper into the white forest as the morning sun rose and chased away
the clouds. The winter snow was unforgiving as the biting cold numbed our bodies.
We struggled to find a good spot to plant the bait as the ghost-white snow clung on
to our boots like icy-fingers, holding us back. Olivia stayed close while I led the way.
The air was filled with an unnerving silence as we halted and scanned a small
clearing in the middle of the forest.

“Olivia, hide behind those bushes while I place the bait. Hold the hunting rifle and
remember, keep silent.” I instructed as she made haste.

The bait was set and all we had to do, was wait. The garish sunlight shone upon the
bait before us as we waited for some unfortunate animal to arrive. Mist started to
float above the ground, ethereal and ghost-like. We sighed in irritation and worry. A
frosty zephyr moaned through the lifeless snow-covered trees as the fluttering of
feathered wings broke the silence.

We ducked behind the bushes and laid there in anticipation.

“Olivia, remember what I said, control your breath and hold it before pulling the
trigger, you can do this.“ I whispered with assurance.

The sound of snow being displaced by feet were audible. The sound got closer and
closer, louder and louder. There it stood with its four-monstrous legs, jet-black coat
of fur and blade-like teeth. It devoured the bait in an instant and the beast gave off a
thundering roar that shook snow off the branches of dead trees. Olivia whispered to
herself repeatedly

“Aim small, miss small.”

I leaned closer to her ear and instructed, “Now.”

BANG!

An eerie hush fell upon the hallowed forest. I could hear her heart pounding
furiously as she panted with exhilaration. We heard the mournful cry of the black
beast behind the shrubs across from us. We hurriedly followed the trail of crimson
blood that tarnished the white snowy ground. We then found the beast laying on
the snow-covered ground as it breathed heavily. We closed in on it and told Olivia to
finish the job.

In a brief moment, the bear-like beast rose and regained footing. It was absolutely
livid as it swiftly charged at my daughter. Olivia was petrified, frozen by fear as vines
of terror rooted her into the ground. She cringed in intense horror as it approached
her. The grotesque beast knocked her down and came for me. It held me down and
attempted to maul me to death. I offered him my left arm as I shouted

“Olivia! Shoot him! NOW! SHOOT! HELP ME!”.

She did not move. Her face was etched with fear and I felt a frosty chill in the pit of
my stomach. I had to do something. I went for my hunting knife that was strapped
to my pants. I drove the blade through its throat, piercing its tough hide. It dropped
dead.

Its body lay lifelessly on the cold ground. Olivia was still frozen. I looked at her with
deep regret and disappointment.

When will she be ready?

CLIMAX IN NARRATIVE WRITING

The climax is the most exciting part of the story, the part that everything else has
led up to.
Your readers should be expecting the climx, through a build up in tension.

You can use the following things to indicate a tension and lead up to your climax.

 Dramatic verbs to add action

 Sound words including onomatopoeia
 Short description of character emotion
 Short sentences to increase the speed in the preceding sentences.
 Slower speed for climatic sentence. (for instance using repetition or long verb
sounds)
 (avoid long descriptions, too many adjectives or summarising previous
events.)
Read the extract from the novel ‘Lord of the Flies.’

A group of boys are killing a sow (female pig)

Identify the the: rising tension, climax and falling tension. Identify the features
mentioned above.

They surrounded the covert but the sow got away with the sting of another spear in her
flank. The trailing butts hindered her and the sharp, cross-cut points were a torment. She
blundered into a tree, forcing a spear still deeper; and after that any of the hunters could
follow her easily by the drops of vivid blood. They were just behind her when she
staggered into an open space where bright flowers grew and butterflies danced round
each other and the air was hot and still.



Here, struck down by the heat, the sow fell and the hunters hurled themselves at her. This
dreadful eruption from an unknown world made her frantic; she squealed and bucked
and the air was full of sweat and noise and blood and terror. Jack was on top of the sow,
stabbing down with his knife. Roger found a place in the pigflesh for his point. The spear
moved forward inch by inch and the terrified squealing became a high-pitched scream.
Then Jack found the throat and the hot blood spouted over his hands. The sow collapsed
under them.



At last the immediacy of the kill subsided. They boys drew back, and Jack stood up,
holding out his hands.



“Look.”



He giggled and flecked them while the boys laughed at his reeking palms. Then Jack
grabbed Maurice and rubbed the stuff over his cheeks .

VOCABULARY
Improve your vocabulary by using some of the words found HERE

https://www.dailywritingtips.com/100-beautiful-and-ugly-words/
ADVICE FROM THE EXAMINERS-
FEEDBACK REPORT NARRATIVE
 Carefully shape your narratives.
 Carefully plan your characters and plot line, especially the climax
 Make use of settings that are familiar to you.
 Use the setting to build tension.
 Skilfully handle plot revelations.
 Don’t forget to reveal plot details.
 Don’t forget a climax
 Don’t include too many events.
 Don’t include unconnected and far-fetched details
 Don’t use too much dialogue.
 Use lively and varied vocabulary.
 Use a variety of sentence structures to create effects.
 Stay in the past tense.
 Be carefully with punctuation Use capital letters correctly.
 Avoid common spelling errors.

IMPORTANT TIPS BY THE EXAMINER

 Decide on a tense and then stick to it; do not jump between present and past.
The normal narrative tense is past and those who try to write in the present
usually forget to do so after a while, so it is safer to start off in the past.
 Know what your last sentence is going to be before you write your first. A
narrative has to build up to a climax and lead towards a conclusion which is
planned before it starts or it will end lamely or incomprehensibly, or the pace
will be too slow or too fast.
 Don’t try to do too much; you can’t cover many events and many years in one
short composition. Select key moments and skip over the rest, changing the
pace according to the intensity of the moment.
 Do not try to include too many characters (three are enough) or to give them
all speech.
 For the top grade, complexity of narrative and structure is required e.g.
framing the story; flashback or forward time jump; two parallel strands being
brought together. However, do not attempt these devices unless you are sure
you can manage them.
 Use dialogue by all means (if you can punctuate and set it out correctly) but
don’t overdo it. You shouldn’t turn your story into a play, nor should you dilute
the effect of occasional and significant moments of speech by giving the
characters trivial things to say throughout.
 If you do use dialogue, find synonyms for ‘he said/she said’ or it becomes
tedious and predictable.
 Even narrative needs description. The characters and places need details to
bring them alive and to allow the reader to be able to imagine them.
 Choose first or third person and stick with your choice; and do not switch
narrative viewpoint, as this is confusing for the reader
 Do not use a first person narrator if you want to die at the end of your story! It
is generally safer to use third person narration as it gives you more flexibility
and a wider viewpoint.
 Do not end your story with ‘And then I woke up in hospital’, or ‘It was all a
dream’. Try to avoid clichés of any kind, including stereotyped characters and
predictable outcomes.
 Use similes, but avoid obvious ones such as ‘as red as a rose’. Make
comparisons unusual, but still apt, by giving them a moment’s thought and
making them more specific e.g. ‘as red as a matador’s cape’.
 Straightforward stories do not get higher than C grade marks; details help
create originality and engage reader interest, which is what is needed for a B
grade, so use plenty of them.
 Narrative needs tension, but you should not exaggerate; too much gore or too
many unlikely events become ridiculous, and fear is more believable when it is
mental rather than physical.
 It is better to think of something that actually happened to you, or someone
you know, or which you read in a book or saw in a film, than to try to make up
something entirely from scratch, as it will sound more convincing if it based
on real or fictional experience. You are then, however, free to adapt,
embellish and exaggerate the original idea to make it relevant and
memorable, rather than just retelling the plot synopsis or giving a factual
account.
 Keep a balance in the different parts of the narrative. An over-long
introduction reduces the effect of the middle section where things build up to
a climax, and you need to leave yourself time to create a memorable ending.
 Stories need a conclusion, where things are either resolved or left unresolved
as a cliff- hanger (though on the whole readers prefer to know how a story
ended.). You must not give the impression that you stopped writing because
you ran out of time, ink or ideas.
 Openings to compositions are important as they either engage the reader or
they don’t, and this affects the examiner’s attitude from the beginning.
 It is essential that you choose a question out of the six available which you
understand and which suits your writing abilities, as students are rarely
equally proficient in all three writing genres.
 The three genres of question are marked differently for Content and
Structure; They are marked according to the same mark scheme for Style
and Accuracy. The style of expression of the three genres is very different, so
you need to be aware of the characteristics of each.
 Whichever type of essay you choose, it should be planned first. If after 5 mins
you have only managed to collect a few ideas for your choice of title, switch
to another one. The plan should contain between 6 to 10 points or ideas,
which can be developed into paragraphs, if the essay is going to be of a
suitable content and length. Aim for approx. 8 paragraphs and 400 words
  Generally, maturity of content and expression is required for higher marks
i.e. maturity for a 16 yr old.
 This is the only part of the 0500 exam in which you can show off your range
of personal vocabulary, so make good use of the opportunity.

USING REAL EVENTS TO INSPIRE YOUR

NARRATIVE COMPOSITION
Lots of you are referring to real life events in your narrative compositions. This can
be successful if done in a sensitive way.

One event you may want to use is the September 11th attacks on the Twin Towers
in New York. OR The 26/11 Taj attack in Mumbai.

EXERCISE
Using at least one of these sources as inspiration, plan and write a narrative
response to one of the following composition question:

 Write a story with the title ‘Attack.’

 Write a story in which rescue is the central theme.
 Write a story where the central theme is loss.
 ‘The boy sprinted away from the crowds and headed towards the rubble.’ Use
this sentence to start a story.
 ‘When she turned on the television she couldn’t believe what she saw.’ Use
this sentence to begin your story.
 ‘As the looked among the debris they were surprised to hear a faint voice.’
Use this sentence somewhere in your story.
 ‘At last I could see a dim light.’ Use this sentence to either begin or end a
story.
 Write a story in which the central character is desperately trying to contact
someone.
 You see a young boy crying on a street corner. Start the story with your
interaction with the boy.
 Write a story in which being late is central to the plot.

VOCABULARY BUILDERS. EXPRESSIVE

PHRASES. LITERARY EXPRESSIONS
(REFER TO THE HARD COPY NOTES AND USE THEM IN YOUR WRITING)

POINT OF VIEW
It is very important that you never change your point of view. Students often make
this error in their narratives. Narratives can be written in the third or first person,
but remember if your write it in the first person you cannot die! Students also make
the error of writing in the first person in their summary writing. Summary writing
must be in the third person, even if the stimulus material is in the first person.

NARRATIVE WITH A TWIST

To achieve Band 1 (A grade) in our composition task you must be able to
create complex and sophisticated narratives . One way of doing this is to include a
well planned twist.

SETTING
Setting is the time and place of the action of a story. The setting may be
specific and detailed and introduced at the very beginning of the story,
or it may be merely suggested through the use of details scattered
throughout the story. Customs, manners, clothing, scenery, weather,
geography, buildings, and methods of transportation are all part of
setting.

The Purpose of Setting

 To get a band 1 or 2 in your composition narratives you must include, ‘detail
and attention to characters and setting.’ You may also be asked to analyse a
paragraph describing setting in the writer’s effect question on paper 2. But
why is setting so important?
 Good writers choose particular settings, not because it is realistic or accurate,
but because of what it accomplishes in the story.
 Setting is used for a number of reasons:
 The setting can provide important information about the main character,
whether he or she is connected to the setting, at home in it, an outsider, or a
guest.
 A setting that is vivid increases the credibility of the character and the action.
If the reader accepts the setting as real, then the reader is more likely to
accept the characters who live there, and their behaviour as real. On the other
hand, “mistakes” in setting may cause the reader to give up on the story as
“fake”. This applies to fantasy settings as well as realistic settings.
 The setting of a story often has a direct connection to the story’s meaning.
For example, a description of a house can help illustrate an overall feeling of
loneliness and isolation. Or the intense activity of a city setting might be
linked to excitement. These feelings can be connected to a character or to the
theme.
 Sometimes the setting will hold keys to understanding one of the characters.
Where a person lives is often very much a part of who that person is.
  The setting can be used to create increase tension or to se the mood and
atmosphere, if these are important to the story

DESCRIPTIVE WRITING
Model Text

Task: Imagine you found a hidden garden. Describe your emotions and feelings
as you discover it, and what is remarkable about it.

The Secret Garden

At the top of my parents’ apartment block is a set of rusted iron stairs that lead
onto the roof - or so I thought. The gunmetal grey sign warns in stern, no-
nonsense capitals: ‘NO ENTRY - DANGER,’ so I have no idea what got into me
that afternoon when I decided to climb them. Forcing open the heavy, protesting
trap door, I stepped into another world.

For there, facing me was the most lush, luxuriant garden I have ever seen. A
wrought-iron arch, twisted round with the delicate, interlocking fingers of fragrant
pink roses greeted me, and though it was framed a serenely meandering
walkway, sprinkled with sand radiant in the sun like specks of pure gold. Further
in the distance the foliage of so many trees along the path, their branches arching
over it to embrace one another, formed a rich canvas of greens of every shade
and depth as far as the eye could see.

As I took my first tentative steps, the delicate sound of tiny fountains at either side
of the path welcomed me, like the fanfare of a thousand minute orchestras. The
earthy smell of water on soil mixed with a joyous melody of sweet floral
fragrances and leafy scents from within the trees. It felt like the first morning on
Earth.

Meanwhile, from below came the distant sounds and smells of the brutal urban
jungle which surrounded this hidden garden: cars snarling and screeching at
each other; people hooting and bellowing; buzzsaws and pneumatic drills from
building sites trampling the ground and reverberating through the earth.

I am at peace. Away from it all.

Yet there was more. Off the main pathway were further routes, like smaller and
more delicate streams as I walked upriver. I explored each in turn, and each
revealed a fresh delight. Along one, a hammock swung drowsily in the breeze.
Along another were neat rows of newly planted, tiny flowers of every colour, like
dotted lines of wet paint. Despite the searing, dry heat of the surrounding city, the
garden seemed cool and fertile, and the flowers were thriving.

How could I have missed this place? Who had created it? Whoever it was must
have realised that we all need an escape from the heat, dust and noise of the city
below. As improbable as it seemed, this was a real oasis, not a mirage. And it
was mine.
Or was it? From back where I had come from I heard the now familiar creak of
the trap door opening. I suddenly felt like an intruder. Time to leave. I crept
quickly back to the entrance, careful not to rustle any of the branches as I
passed, and was relieved to see that whoever had come in was already out of
sight. The door was an open mouth leading from the garden into the belly of the
apartment block. With regret, I slipped quietly down the stairs, the sweet smells
and serene sounds of the secret garden gently fading as if they had been nothing
but a dream, to be replaced by couples arguing, televisions blaring, and chicken
frying,

I was back in the real world.

Structure

One possible way to structure descriptive writing is in terms of space.

1. Positioning
The observer takes up a position relative to the object or place being
described. For example, they are standing outside a room. This should be at a
distance so that interest is aroused as to what will be revealed on closer
inspection e.g. when the gate into the secret garden is opened or the chest in the
attic is opened. The senses of sight and sound will be explored in this section
and used to draw the reader in.
2. Approaching
The observer moves towards the object or place being described. New details
can be revealed because they are nearer. At this stage the sense of smell can be
added to sight and sound.
3. Arriving
The observer is now part of the scene, e.g. in the heart of the street market, or in
contact with the object, such as going through the items in a chest. Minute details
of vision and noise can be used here, and also the sense of touch can be
explored, and taste implied e.g. people in the scene are eating, the sea is salty.
4. Farewell
The observer leaves the scene, with or without a backward glance. They may
have replaced anything they disturbed in a room and now close the door so that
things are again as they were at the beginning; alternatively it may be going
home time for the people on the beach or at the market, so that the scene
empties and becomes the opposite of how it was at the beginning.

To what extent does the model text follow this structure?

How could the positioning > approaching > arriving > farewell structure be
adapted for TIME instead of SPACE? For example, if you were describing
the setting of the sun, you could not describe yourself approaching and
arriving at the sun! You would need to structure it in terms of time instead.

EXAMPLE 2
I held my left palm to my forehead to shield my eyes from the fierce rays of the sun and
looked out over the beach. The sandy crescent stretched for miles. In the widest
stretch of the yellow halfmoon, crowds of people moved. Excited children were
running as quickly as they could towards the blue tinged green sea whilst their parents
walked slowly behind, like elephants, laden with hampers, towels, blankets and bags.
The children screamed as they pitched headfirst into the water that momentarily
chilled them to the bone. A golden Labrador scampered after the children, barking
excitedly. She dived straight in and gave the children a friendly nuzzle, before
swimming in circles with a big doggy grin, relieved to get the baking heat out of its
shaggy coat.

TOP TIPS:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=H52BdK1M600

EXAMPLE 3
Describe the scene and atmosphere when you visit a theme park, fairground or carnival.

The sweltering heat seemed to mitigate as brilliant blue sky mellowed into a placid orange, the salty
sea breeze spraying onto the light brown boardwalk. The pink cotton candy sticks were like the
feathery clouds dotting the sky, but those clouds above weren't nearly as sugary or fluffy. Only static
black thread and toothpicks molded into an infant’s building blocks from afar, the bright
multicolored lights flashed here and there on the solid spinning structures as I gaped in awe from the
mobbed ticket booth.

Shrill screams burst out. Creaking metal clash. Clowns guffawed. But together, with the jovial,
timeless carnival music accompanied by giggles of laughter from prancing children, a mellifluous
tune was composed. Overwhelmed by a strong scent, I became a hound dog, searching for the
source - was it the gooey, cheesy-caramel mix of popcorn? Or wafts of the rich, indulgent burger
flowing from the small cafe? A man held the sides of a filthy tall trash can, retching, his face dunked
in, his whole body wriggling like a caterpillar. Food - later.

Like a thin stream of ants to a lollipop, people trickled into line, which was getting longer than the
250 foot drop itself, and would take longer than four seconds. Chattering like monkeys, they were
oblivious to the lengthy stretch, prattling on and on about the supreme banana that they would
experience in around an hour. They were as enraged as bears as I flashed my VIP pass, gritting their
teeth as if ready to take a bite out of me. And I, like a fluffy rabbit, hid my face and scuttled quickly
away from the scowls of the predators.

Floating with the clouds, the ferris wheel was a rolling bracelet, the water slide a twisted loop of
string, the cable cars moving marbles. It looked just as small and tidy as the map on my brochure -
ah! I had felt weightless - my stomach was in my throat, my sweaty hands clenched the seat, my
eyes popped open. I was shaking like a tambourine, yet a wide grin rested on my face, like my
comrades.

Giant fluffy bears, elephants, and dogs, their arms outstretched, beckoned me over to small shops,
where money was sure to go down the drain. The ring was to be placed on the giant open mouth, and
three would result in a perfect marriage - me and my lion. One, two and three! I had emerged
victorious from the exhilarating battle. Lugging my trophy around as a sign of great skill (perhaps
luck), licking a triple-scooped rocky road ice cream cone, envy shone on every child’s face as they
gawked at me. I lived the life of a child as an adult, for that brief evening.

-----

Of course, there are some uncomfortable phrases that don't fit in - I've highlighted one of them. Your
image needs to be likened to that of a wider audience rather than simply something that may make
somewhat sense to you. What that highlighted portion was supposed to be was the black shadow of
roller coasters in various shapes as the sun set behind the park, but that clearly was not able to
convey its message to the audience. Therefore think about each image and if it's clear to you and will
be clear to the examiner. Try to find a better way to illustrate the highlighted phrase, and try to do
the same with phrases with your writing.
Most of descriptive writing is simply imagining a familiar scene in your head, and looking at each
individual aspect, then trying to put all of those aspects together in an interesting way. It all comes
with practice and feedback, and continuing that loop until perfect (though for english, there's almost
always room for improvement).