Rhinky Bits

Posted originally on the Archive of Our Own at http://archiveofourown.org/works/11455233.

Rating: Not Rated

Archive Warning: No Archive Warnings Apply
Category: Gen, M/M, Multi
Fandom: Rhett & Link
Relationship: Rhett McLaughlin/Link Neal, Jessie McLaughlin/Rhett McLaughlin,
Christy Neal/Link Neal
Character: Rhett McLaughlin, Link Neal, Christy Neal, Jessie McLaughlin, Mike
Criscimagna, Alex Punch, Chase Hilt, Stevie Wynne Levine, Mamrie
Hart, Grace Helbig
Stats: Published: 2017-07-10 Updated: 2020-02-26 Chapters: 53/? Words:
38092

Rhinky Bits
by LinksLipsSinkShips

Summary

Prompt-inspired Rhink ficlets that don't really go together. Enjoy! Please see individual
chapters for Ratings.

Notes

Written for the prompt "Why don't they just kiss already?" for julie1974
 Kiss Already
Chapter Summary

Kiss Already is rated T.

“I totally don’t get it, though.” Mike sighed, pressing his fingers to the bridge of his nose. “Why
don’t they just kiss already?”

“Because they’re married, you dimwit. Why would they kiss?” Chase felt like the only one in the
office who actually shipped Rhett and Link with their wives. How could anyone think they should
kiss, anyway?

“They can be married and still be in love with each other, Chase.” Alex just grinned. He didn’t
really care if they kissed or not, but darn it, it was funny to rile Chase up a little bit, watch him get
all flustered trying to defend the fact that the guys shouldn’t kiss.

They were all sitting around a table, eating lunch, and they just couldn’t stop talking about it. The
guys seemed to have not-kissed in a million different ways.

“Okay, if they really didn’t want to kiss, why would they keep trying to kiss? I mean, if I don’t
want to kiss someone I don’t spend all my time basically kissing them.” Mike glanced out of the
corner of his eye at Alex, who grinned widely.

“What the heck are you talking about? They’ve never kissed!” Chase couldn’t help but raise his
volume, and everyone quieted down to stare at them.

“Everything okay over here, guys?” Stevie walked over to the table, taking a seat. Anytime her
team was arguing this much, she tried to just sit and hear out both sides.

“Just off the top of my head… the plexiglass kiss in the news musical episode thing, the lipstick
paintings of each other, the lipstick tests where their mannequins kind of looked like each other…”
Alex started listing off times that they’d kissed-but-not-kissed.

“…there was also that time they kissed through my hands,” Stevie muttered, putting her dog in the
fight instead of just mediating quietly.

Chase glared over at Stevie. “Seriously, you, too?” He snapped, having trouble believing even she
wanted them to kiss.

“I mean, honestly, Chase, could you really spend that much time with someone, be that close in
their proximity, and not possibly consider what it would be like to kiss them?” Stevie said it
quietly, trying not to ruffle anyone’s feathers, but honestly, why didn’t they just kiss already?

The discussion continued, sometimes heatedly, to the point that no one actually noticed the fact
that neither Rhett nor Link came down to have lunch. They didn’t always, sure, but they tried to at
least come downstairs and eat lunch with their crew more often than not.

Upstairs, Rhett locked the door behind him.

“You sure you’re okay with missing lunch? We both know you don’t like to skip meals, and we’re
supposed to eat with the Crew today,” Link chuckled as he reached towards Rhett, not really caring
about the answer to his question.

“Nah. It’s possible to survive on peanut butter peppermint lip balm, right?” He flicked a tongue out
to run it along Link’s lower lip. “I’m sure they won’t miss us down there anyway.”
 Braids
Chapter Notes

Written for usefulmammal with the prompt "You braided his hair?" Braids is rated G--
it's all fluff here.

Link watched their hair and makeup girls work hard to get the extensions just right for Rhett’s
manbun. Typically, he and Rhett each had their own talented hair and makeup girls, but today, both
girls teamed up to tackle the extensions and get Rhett ready for shooting.

Link, already prepared, just sat and watched, keeping Rhett company during the process as his
locks transformed from his hair-goes-up style to long, flowing locks. Link was mesmerized by the
process, and how much the hair suited Rhett, and though he’d watched the transformation happen,
seeing the finished result left him in stunned silence. It wasn’t until their hair and makeup ladies
left for the day that Rhett was finally able to ask Link for his honest opinion, but Link just stood
there, staring again, without a word.

“Say something, brother! You’re making me feel a little self-conscious.” Rhett was nervous,
thinking Link must hate the look.

“It just looks… I mean… can I touch it?”

“What?”

“Can I touch your hair? It looks really soft.” Link blushed, trying to make this as not-weird as
possible. The extensions looked so real, as though Rhett had grown the hair out himself. Had he
not watched the extensions being put in, he would think Rhett had access to some sort of super-
hair-growth formula, that’s how great they looked on him.

Rhett agreed, and Link ran his fingers slowly through Rhett’s hair, just wanting to feel the
extensions at first, but suddenly massaging his scalp and playing with the hair.

Rhett groaned in relief. His head had been so itchy from the extensions, and they’d pulled and
tugged at his hair until his scalp was sore. This felt amazing, relaxing all of the tension he’d had
from the shoot and the long days.

Rhett laid down on the couch in his trailer, his head resting on Link’s thigh as Link continued to
run his fingers through Rhett’s hair. Rhett dozed off, exhausted from the day, and thoroughly
enjoying his friend’s gentle touch.

When he awoke, he still felt Link’s fingers, now lingering at the end of a small strand of hair. Link
was grinning.

“What are you up to, Chiasquatch?” Rhett rarely used that nickname for Link, but something about
his mischevious smile right now made it feel right.

“Nothing.” Link giggled like a schoolgirl, his smile now extending from ear to ear as he snorted a
little bit.
“Oh, brother.” Rhett sat up, looking in the mirror. Every bit of his hair, every strand, was neatly
tucked into small braids. It wasn’t a bad look, but it was definitely unexpected. “Where’d you learn
to braid like that?”

“Well, I mean, I do have a daughter…” Sometimes when Christy wasn’t home, Link would help
Lily braid her hair. It had become less necessary since she got older, but after her back surgery,
braids were a good way to keep her hair neat, so Link had gotten some practice recently.

“You braided his hair?” Jessie’s jaw dropped when the boys arrived at dinner that night. They’d
been working so hard on filming Buddy System that their wives had insisted on a double date to
take their mind off of work for a little while. Christy and Jessie met Rhett and Link at the
restaurant, and both were shocked to see that not only did he have extensions, but they were
braided.

“My head was hurting so badly after getting the extensions! Link was helping me out.” Rhett
insisted that it was all Link’s idea, which, it was, but Link wondered why he had to drop dime on
him.

“Oh, yeah, it seems like your head hurt really bad the whole time you were snoring.” Link
snickered, thinking about how Rhett had just crashed out on his lap.

“I mean, it isn’t a terrible look,” Christy insisted, reaching out to touch one of the strands. “And at
least Link is really good at braids?”

The four of them took their seats at the table and tried to steer the conversation to anything but
work.

“You braided his hair?!” Rhett’s stylist exclaimed the next morning. “Okay… well… I can work
with this.” Link could tell she was biting her tongue, trying really hard not to be annoyed at all of
the extra work he’d created for her.

“I’m sorry. I can help you take the braids out?” Link suggested, helpfully.

“You do this again, and I’m making you take all of them out!” She laughed as she and Link took
their time on opposite sides of Rhett, carefully and quickly working to undo the braids. The hair
fell softly on Rhett’s shoulders, now in careful waves that framed his face.

“I don’t know, man. I think I’m going to keep the extensions. I look pretty darn good!”
 Ambient Massage Song
Chapter Notes

Inspired by an anon who submitted the prompt "Come over here and make me."
Ambient Massage Song is rated M for Mature audiences.

Suggested Listening: Ambient Massage Song by Rhett

I'm so tight, so stressed, need someone to rub my neck.

"Gosh, Rhett, Please... no... not again... please..." Link pleaded with Rhett as the song began
suddenly playing as they started the challenge. "Seriously? Is this like... your Rick Roll or
something?"

The entire crew cackled from behind the camera, both at the boys trying a "self-massage
challenge" using various props that seemed innocent enough, but were marketed as personal
massagers that were... well... not always used for their intended purposes. It was a comedic, albeit
awkward, situation as it was. But the last thing Link Neal wanted to be thinking about was his best
friend's booty knot, especially while holding what was basically a glorified vibrator marketed to
people who were too polite to just buy a damn vibrator already.

Aw yeah, that's the spot, I like the way you work my muscle knots.

The song continued, Link dropping the massager to cover his ears. The massager bounced and
skittered across the floor, causing Rhett to lose focus on his own attempts at "relaxing himself
through massage" on the screen as he clutched his chest with laughter.

The challenge was supposed to be simple enough. They'd test each provided item, placing it on part
of their body-- back, neck, chest-- and let it work it's magic while they endured stressful situations.
The one that provided the most stress relief would be named the best personal massager.

Put some oil on my back, give me a two-handed attack.

Link should have known the second the crew pitched a ridiculous massage challenge that this song
was going to come up at some point. It had come up in so many instances, mostly where it was
completely unnecessary, like their eating utensil video. The first time it was hilarious, but after this
many times, Link was wondering how much more he could take. He'd heard Rhett's stories of
weird massages he'd received, and most of them revolved around Rhett being naked. All this song
did was flash images in Link's mind of a naked Rhett, just begging for Link to give him a nice
massage with oils, just as the song said.

I had a really hard week and I want you to rub my feet.

"LINK! Uncover your ears, man! It's almost over! You don't want to miss the best part!" Rhett was
almost doubled over with laughter, the challenge essentially forgotten by now. No amount of
personal massage was going to help Link relax when all he could think of was diving across the
room and tackling his friend on the ground, giving him the massage and so much more.
"WHAT?!" Link yelled, unable to hear Rhett through his hands, especially over the loud music that
was still playing.

"UNCOVER YOUR EARS!" Rhett enunciated, hoping Link would either hear him, read his lips,
or grasp the hand gestures he was using and do what he'd asked.

"COME OVER HERE AND MAKE ME!" Link screamed back. It was a childish retort, sure, but
if he uncovered his ears, he'd probably lose his mind.

I'm so stiff, so stressed, need someone to rub my chest.

"Dang it, Link!" Rhett collided with Link, dragging him to the ground. "You want me to make
you? Okay. I'm dead."

Link could feel Rhett's weight pressing into him. Really? The 'I'm Dead' move? Link was torn
between trying to get Rhett off of him, which would require removing his hands from his ears, or
just waiting until the song ended. He tried holding his hands on his ears, rolling to each side in
hopes of dislodging the large man on his back. No luck. All he'd managed to do was wiggle his
hips, and in the process, he'd felt something incredibly unexpected, hard, against his upper thigh.
Oh gosh.

"Rhett, just quit it man, just... jeez, guys, cut the song already!" It continued blasting, and he wasn't
even sure if anyone could hear him. How many times had they queued this up to repeat?

Rhett whispered in Link's ear, close enough that only Link could hear, but quiet enough for it to be
drowned out by the loud Ambient Massage Song that was playing. Nothing about it was "ambient,"
of course, not in the traditional sense.

"Link, baby, aren't you going to work my booty knot?" Rhett giggled and Link's annoyance
dissolved into a ridiculous chuckle as well.

"I have an idea," Link responded quietly, and Rhett took that as his cue to get up.

Aw yeah, that's the spot. I like the way you work my booty knot.

"You know what, Stevie? This one just isn't working. I think it's the application, though. Rhett, test
it out on me, see if that works... that 'I'm Dead' move really worked up quite the booty knot!" Link
waggled his pelvis at Rhett, then began laughing until he had tears in his eyes. Rhett pressed the
massager against Link's hip, moving it down, then to the side, until Link groaned loudly and
exclaimed "Awww, yeah, that's the spot!" As soon as he said it, he knew that would either be the
end of Rhett's ridiculous Ambient Massage Song on GMM, or the start of it appearing more than
ever. Either way, he felt a sense of victory. He winked at the camera, then said: "You know what
time it is."
 My Shirt
Chapter Notes

Written for an anon who asked for "Is there a special reason as to why you're wearing
my shirt?" My Shirt is rated M for Mature audiences.

Link slowly buttoned the buttons on the plaid shirt as he sat on the edge of the bed. He was
exhausted, still a little sweaty, but they had to get back downstairs before anyone asked too many
questions.

"Hey, uh, Link? Is there a special reason you're wearing my shirt?" Rhett, still lying back on the
bed, scratched at his beard. He looked so good like that, relaxed, comfortable, eyes still fluttering
half-closed.

"Of course. When I walk out of this room, you're going to spend the rest of this event looking at me
in your shirt and thinking about what we just did."

"I'd be thinking about it anyway," Rhett said, propping himself up on his elbows.

"Yeah, but now you're going to imagine taking this shirt back off of me later, aren't you? In fact, I
think that should be the rule... you can't have it back until you take it from me yourself." Link
waggled his eyebrows, a sly grin on his face.

"Mmmrghhmm... why do you have to torture me, bo?" Rhett smiled, crawling forward to give
Link a soft kiss.

"You know you love it."

"I do. But now how am I supposed to walk out there and see you like that and not get all turned on,
hmm?" Rhett was now seated behind Link, his arms around him, buttoning the last of the buttons
for him. He pressed kisses into Link's neck, inhaling the scent that was just so... Link.

"Easy. You're going to put my shirt on, go downstairs, and pretend that nothing happened. And if
you act calm, no one will know that anything did. Now, I'm going to go down while you get
dressed."

Rhett tugged Link's tee shirt over his head, wondering how many people would notice they'd
switched shirts, and wondering if anyone would ask them why. It was a pretty casual event, just a
fun house party that Grace was throwing after the official book release party her publisher had
thrown. The real bash had been a dress-up affair, but this? This was pure fun.

Rhett headed downstairs to see Link already mingling, laughing, and flirting with everyone around.
Gosh, he was so flirty. Really, it seemed he was flirty with everyone except for Rhett. Rhett knew
the truth, though. He may be flirting with them, but only one person had his heart.

Rhett weaved through the crowd towards Link, and as Link felt him approach, he turned and
offered him a drink. "How'd you know I was here, man?"

"Dude, after this long, you don't think I can feel you coming?" Dang it, Link, why couldn't you have
used the word approaching?! Rhett felt himself blush, chuckling awkwardly at the innuendo, and
Mamrie cackled as she caught on.

"You two, God, no wonder everyone ships you!" She grabbed a drink from the table and walked
away. Link stepped back, allowing his shoulder to press into Rhett's chest, but more importantly,
allowing his arm to graze the front of Rhett's jeans.

"I'm gonna go mingle, man. You coming?" Link downed the punch, which was very clearly more
alcohol than juice, and took off in the crowd. All Rhett could do was follow his shirt, and the sly
little temptation that was wearing it, through the room. He had a feeling getting his shirt back later
was going to be a lot of fun.
 You First
Chapter Summary

Rhett's struggling with letting Link go. You First is rated T.

Chapter Notes

Written for the prompt "You know, it hurt when I realized that you're not in love with
me. But nothing can compare to the pain I felt when I saw you fall in love with her."
Suggested by tokyowhaaaa

Rhett was curled up in a corner, trying not to wrinkle his tuxedo, but also only caring a little bit.
The large man was trying to make himself as small, as inconspicuous as possible. He just needed a
minute alone, just a small minute to let himself grieve.

He was losing his best friend. I mean, not really losing him. They'd still be best friends. But as soon
as he stood up there, watched Link take his vows, he'd be letting Link close the door on any
potential that Rhett could tell him how he truly felt.

What does it matter, anyway? Rhett thought to himself. Link doesn't feel the same way. He never
has, he never will. He's in love with Christy, and I have to let him go.

Still, a strangled sob gurgled in his throat as he tried to choke back tears and emotion.

"Hey, Rhett... I've been looking everywhere for you, man! You okay?" Link walked over to Rhett,
who was still curled in a ball on the floor.

"Yeah, I'm... I'm fine. I'll be in there in a second, sorry. I just needed to sit down."

"There are chairs in there, man. What's up?" Link sat down on the floor next to Rhett, their sides
glued together.

"I just... I'm really happy for you and Christy, Link. Really. I don't want to mess up your big day.
Go back in there. I promise I'm okay." Rhett tried to blink quickly enough to lock his tears in his
eyes, but if Link stayed much longer, the floodgates would open and he'd ruin it all.

"Nope. I've known you for too long, buddyroll. Talk to me." Link bumped himself against Rhett,
nudging him to talk but also trying to nudge him into knowing Link would always be there, no
matter what he said now.

"Link, I..." Rhett tried to figure out how to phrase it without making Link want to haul off and
punch him right in the mouth. "I..."

Link took Rhett's hand, interlocking their fingers. "I know."

"You know?" Rhett's jaw dropped, unsure of what else to say. Link knew?
"Yeah, man. I know." Link said quietly.

"If you know, and you're still going ahead with it... then I guess I know where we stand then."
Rhett sighed. He didn't figure it would change anything, Link knowing, but he also hated that it
didn't. "You know, it really hurt when I realized that you're not in love with me. And I did realize
it, I realized it a long time ago, when you met Christy. But nothing can compare to the pain I felt
when I saw you fall in love with her, and I don't know if I'm strong enough to stand up there with
you, man. I just don't." His tears were flowing freely down his face now, and with his free hand,
Link tried to wipe them away.

"Wait, you think that I don't love you, too?" Link's eyebrows raised, concern written all over his
face.

"Well, yeah. I mean, if you did, you wouldn't be getting married, would you?"

"Oh, Rhett. I do love Christy, just like you love Jessie. I made a commitment to Christy, askin' her
to marry me, and you're gonna do the same thing with Jessie. That's just how it is, man. But it's
you. It's always been you. We just... we have to do this, okay? That doesn't change anything.
Remember, I chose you first."

"What?"

"I chose you first. When we were 15, back at the rocks, and we made that oath. I chose you first.
It's always been you and me, man. And it's always going to be you and me." Link leaned towards
Rhett, his hand on Rhett's jaw to turn his face just enough for Link to brush his lips against Rhett's.
Their first kiss, their last for a very long time. Link wiped away the rest of Rhett's tears, then
settled back into the space next to him, head resting on Rhett's shoulder. They sat there in silence
in the empty room for a long time until Rhett looked down at our watch.

"It's time, Link. You gotta go get married." He stood up, holding an arm out to Link to help him up,
too.

"Love you, Rhett."

"I love you, too, Link."

"Forever?"

"Yeah. Forever."
 Solo
Chapter Summary

Link's not happy about Rhett's opportunity to work alone. Solo is rated T.

Chapter Notes

Written for the Prompt "Go, then. Leave. See if I care" as suggested by Tokyowhaaa

See the end of the chapter for more notes

The candle flew across the room, hitting the wall next to Rhett's head. The glass around it
shattered, the tobacco-scented candle itself hitting the ground with a loud thud.

"What the hell, man?" Rhett whipped around to see Link absolutely fuming.

"What the hell? What the hell?! You really have to ask that, Rhett?" Link approached, this time
grabbing a magazine off of the coffee table in their office, flinging it in Rhett's direction. "If you
have to ask, then clearly you're dumber than I thought!" Link's voice was getting louder, frantic,
and near-hysterical.

"Link, seriously, talk to me!" Rhett couldn't figure out what Link was so angry about, what had him
so hurt. A book whizzed across the room, this time almost hitting Rhett. His catlike reflexes
snatched it out of the air, but dammit, it stung his hand.

"What's there to talk about? I saw the invitation."

"What invitation, Link, what the hell are you talking about?" Rhett tried to think of what Link
could possibly be so angry about, but he was drawing a total blank.

"You know what invitation, you jerk!" Link was within reaching distance now, so Rhett reached
out and grabbed his wrists. Link tried to tug away.

"Link. Talk to me. Calm down and talk." Rhett's voice stayed steady, calming.

"No! You sit there on the show every day and act like this means so much to you but now you're
trying to do solo stuff? I bet you're gonna take it, too. Go then, leave! See if I care!" Link shoved
Rhett backward by moving his wrists, all of the energy transferring through Rhett's grasp, but
Rhett held tightly.

"Solo stuff? I've never considered solo stuff, you idiot. What part of the 'and Link' in 'Rhett and
Link' doesn't tell you that? I don't know anything about an invitation, or solo work, or anything like
that, but if you're not invited, I'm not interested, got it?" Rhett tried to look Link in the eyes, make
sure he knew that he was telling the truth.

Link yanked his arms away, successfully this time. "Whatever, man." He stormed out of the office,
slamming the door.
 As Rhett cleaned up the broken glass, he spotted some papers, which Link must have thrown
before he threw the candle. Picking them up, he read the script that had been sent over, inviting
Rhett to be a part of the project. Link's name was nowhere on it. Rhett took the papers, ripped them
in fourths, and set them on Link's computer. On a sticky note he scrawled "Anyone who doesn't
know we're in this together, doesn't really know me." With that, Rhett grabbed his bag and headed
home. Link would calm down on his own anyway. Until then, it was best to just steer clear.

Chapter End Notes

If you like stories based on a prompt like this, you might like Conversations. Same
general prompt, WAY more angst-filled.
 Make Art, Not War
Chapter Summary

Sometimes, art just takes the right touch. This chapter is rated M. The full fic, Mixed
Media, is rated E.

Chapter Notes

This fic was inspired by the prompt "Rhett and Link are college art students who hate
each other because they're competitive, but have to learn to get along when they're
assigned to work as a pair on a sculpture." Prompt from awkwardkermitfrog

Oh, y'all want MORE? More is on the way because now I've roped TheMouthKing
into finishing it with me. Find the full fic (more coming soon) here: Mixed Media

See the end of the chapter for more notes

God, he hated him. Seriously, that smug little face with those hipster glasses and that smart-ass
little grin. Rhett felt ridiculously unlucky to have ended up with Link Neal in every single one of
his classes. This semester could not get any worse.

Rhett raised his hand to answer a question the professor had asked, and Link rolled his eyes. Damn,
could that guy be any more of a know-it-all? It got so annoying, seeing him raise his hand to
answer every. single. question. she asked. He sighed heavily as the professor agreed that Rhett was
correct. Whatever, dude.

Link started packing his books into his bag, ready to head to the coffee shop. He needed a hit of
caffeine, big time. Class would be over in minutes, and then he was free, free to get coffee and
return to the studio space to put some paint on a canvas, the image already forming in his mind.
This is why he came to art school, to create, not to sit in some classroom with some jerk who
thought he knew everything there was to know about art history and theory and technique in every
class he was in.

Rhett fidgeted with the keys on his laptop, anxious for class to dismiss so he could take a nap.
That's all he wanted right now, to close his eyes and be dead to the world for an hour. Last night, he
was out partying with friends and his body was definitely protesting that decision today.

"As artists, we need to learn to collaborate with others in the community, even if we don't share the
same style or aesthetic, or the same ideas about art." Class should be over, but the professor was
still talking, droning on about collaborative work. "Before you leave, you need to draw out the
name of who you'll be working with on the sculpture project. This counts for 40% of your final,
so... make it count." She shook a basket and little slips of paper bounced around. She instructed
each person to come up, grab a piece of paper, and reveal the person they'd be working with.

"Mr. McLaughlin, you have first pick." Oh thank goodness, the odds were in his favor... first pick
meant that all of the names were in play. Hopefully he'd get paired up with that adorable brunette
who always sat in the front row. She seemed talented, but more importantly, she was hot and being
her partner meant getting to spend a lot of time with her creating... art. Heh. Rhett reached in,
pulling a slip of paper.

He stared at it with a puzzled expression. "I got my own name. This mean I can just go solo?"

"No, it means we discard it and you draw another. If anyone gets their own name, or the name of
someone who already has a partner, we'll discard it. We'll do this until everyone is paired up." She
plucked the strip of paper from his hand that had his own name written on it neatly. He buried his
hand into the basket and pulled a slip of paper out. As he unfolded it carefully, he scanned the
room until his eyes met with a set of bold blue eyes.

"No."

"Mr. McLaughlin, art isn't about who you want to collaborate with, it's about who can challenge
you and shape you as an artist. Mr. Neal, you'll be working with Mr. McLaughlin."

Link glared at Rhett, then picked up his bag and stormed out of the room without a word.

Seriously? Freakin' seriously? 50 people in the class and he got stuck with the know-it-all? Really?
Sculpture was arguably his least favorite medium, too, and now he had to make one with the tall
snob he couldn't stand. Great. He stood in the hallway, his hands on his knees, vision going red.

"We're not going to be able to make much of a sculpture if you're running off, you know." Link
hadn't noticed Rhett approach, but now Rhett was lounging against the wall, a smirk on his lips
like this was the funniest thing in the world. Link knew Rhett didn't want to work with him
anymore than he wanted to work with Rhett, so the snarky little grin must just be another way to
piss Link off.

"Fine. I'm going to coffee. You can join me to discuss the project, or not. I really don't care." Link
walked away without even looking to see if Rhett was following.

Rhett followed, of course, his desire for a decent grade outweighing his need for a nap. He knew if
his grades dipped, his parents would stop sending cash and make him get a job, and that was cash
he desperately needed in order to throw the best parties. He had a reputation to uphold. His parents
hadn't been keen on the idea of him going to art school as it was, but neither of them could deny his
natural talent, so they'd promised to support it as long as he promised to keep his grades up.

Generally, it came easy to him and he didn't worry. Now a good chunk of his final was riding on
Link Neal's ability to actually sculpt, and he wasn't counting on that.

After both ordered their coffees and swiped their meal plan cards, they picked a table in a corner.

"What are we thinking on this one?"

"Let's just throw a really good pot man. She didn't say we couldn't use a wheel, and that'll be the
most straightforward way to get it right."

Rhett didn't trust Link's ability to actually sculpt something free-form, but if it had been his choice
out of any medium, he would have done some sort of carved wooden sculpture. As it stood, Link
seemed to be more of a painter, or he assumed as much from the acrylic flecks that lined his
cuticles and settled into the lines of his hands. Something on the wheel would be easiest, and he
could make it look good, he was sure. Maybe he'd let Link take over on the glaze, since it wasn't
too much of a stretch from painting.
"I've never... I mean... yeah, sure, that's probably going to work. Whatever."

They made plans to meet in the pottery studio later that night, after their afternoon classes. Rhett
contemplated making room in the schedule for a drink or two... how else was he going to put up
with Link's grating Southern twang if he wasn’t a little buzzed? But the project was too important,
counted for too much, so he figured he’d just try to make it through without.

Rhett and Link each sat in front of their respective pottery wheels. They figured the best way to do
this was to each throw a pot, then pick whichever turned out best. However, as each worked on
their own, glances at how well, or how poorly, the other might be doing caused each of them to
destroy theirs more than once.

"DAMMIT!" Rhett groaned as a stolen glance at Link's pot, or rather, at Link himself, and how he
was so focused on his work, his body arched over the wheel, led to him ruining something that was
actually turning out really well. The clay folded over on itself, and he was frustrated. An hour in,
and they were having no luck. He started over.

"FUCK!" Link yelled 10 minutes later as his also crumpled. It was his fault for being distracted by
the height and sheer perfection of the vase that Rhett was bringing to life so very carefully on the
wheel, but equally Rhett's fault for the ridiculous way his tongue poked out of the corner of his
mouth as he focused the vase he was making.

Link wet his hands again, starting over, as he felt Rhett's tall body hovering over his own. Rhett
snorted, an incredulous laugh escaping his lips. "You think that's how you throw a pot? Really?"

"Yeah, like you're doing so much better over there, jerk." Link glared up at him over the frames of
his glasses, fuming.

"Come on, you're such an amateur, Neal. Why don't you go back to your little canvases? You're
clearly out of place in here."

"Fuck you, Rhett." Link was exhausted, body tired from trying hard to get the piece just right, only
to fail again and again.

"You're still doing it wrong. Here, let me show you." Rhett's tone was harsh, angry. He grabbed
Link's hand, gripping it too hard, pressing it into the clay. He used his other hand to pull the stool
back, out from under Link, so he could balance behind him on the seat. "See, it's not that fucking
hard," he growled into Link's ear, and Link felt his entire face turn red. He hated Rhett so much
right now.

"I think I've got it, thanks." Link snapped at Rhett, trying to tug his arm away from Rhett's grasp,
but it landed up against the clay solidly, destroying it.

“Oh, yeah, clearly,” Rhett sneered, taking Link’s hand again, gently this time. “Let’s just fucking
get through this and be done, okay?”

Rhett guided Link’s hand, and Link softened to allow it. The last thing he wanted to do was spend
any more time on this project, any more time with Rhett, than he had to. Together, they shaped the
clay, adding in more details, each allowing the other to guide and shape it as they went. Link could
feel every breath Rhett took, which made him shudder a little bit. He tried to clear his mind, focus
only on the pottery, but this was actually working, them shaping it together was actually producing
something lovely, and this all just felt so intense and a little bit overwhelming.

“Gosh, you’re shaky,” Rhett said quietly, his voice tickling against Link’s neck as he tried to look
 around Link to see their progress. He was taller than Link, so Link wasn’t quite sure why he had
chosen the angle he had, but he didn’t mind too much, as long as it let them finish the project.
“Must be all that caffeine.”

Yeah. Right. The caffeine.

“What do you think? Think we can finish it?” Link thought what they had looked good, and he
figured they should quit while they were ahead. When Rhett agreed, Link moved to allow Rhett to
remove it from the wheel. The last thing he wanted was to screw up their finished work. Rhett
carefully transferred it off of the wheel, placing it on a rack to dry before it could be fired. He
walked back to Link, getting closer to Link than was really necessary.

“Maybe we should throw one more to be safe?” His voice rasped, deep and husky.

“Ye...yeah… we could do that…” Link said quietly, sitting on the front half of the stool. Rhett
positioned himself behind him, getting clay, and they started another piece. But soon, Rhett’s
hands were finding their way up Link’s arms, and Link found his head leaning back on Rhett’s
shoulder. He felt Rhett’s lips press into his neck, and he reached his hand, covered in clay, to the
back of Rhett’s hair.

Rhett stood up, pulling Link away from the wheel, both of them streaked with clay. He pressed
Link against the wall, kissing him deeply as his hands trailed under Link’s shirt, his mouth moving
to plant kisses along Link’s jaw, his neck. Link gasped and writhed under his touch and his kisses.
“Fuck, Rhett…” He loved the way Link was practically breathing his name, just making him
hungrier. He pulled Link closer, and Link toyed with the buttons on Rhett’s shirt, clay rubbing off
on it. Rhett pulled back to look at Link, to really look at him, and in this moment, his smug grin,
his jerky persona, it had all melted away under the clay and Rhett’s touch. Link stared into Rhett’s
grey-green eyes, seeing far more insecurity than his know-it-all attitude gave off. Rhett was just
about to lean in to kiss Link again when they heard footsteps walking outside of the pottery studio.
They pulled themselves apart, each returning to their wheel, as the door opened. Each of them
became intensely focused on their pottery, stealing glances at one another, small smiles, as the
student who had come in took her place at a wheel.

“Wow, you guys look like you’ve been really hard at work. You’ve got clay all over!” She smiled.

“Yeah, uh, sometimes you just get really into it and make a mess,” Rhett chuckled. He used his
hands to scoop his clay off of the wheel. “I think I’m about done for the day. See you around,
Link?” He winked over at Link, and the smile on his lips seemed like he was suggesting that Link
follow… at least in a few minutes, so as not to seem too conspicuous.

“Yeah, later, man.” He put his focus back on the pot he was working on as Rhett left, trying to get
the clay to do what it had under Rhett’s guiding hands. After a few minutes, he gave up, scooping
his clay aside and stopping his wheel.

He didn’t get two steps outside of the pottery room before he heard the smile in Rhett’s voice.
“Took you long enough, man. I thought maybe you decided to stay there.”

“Nah. Wanna get coffee?”

“Sure, man. Let’s get coffee.”

Chapter End Notes

***THERE WILL BE MORE HERE: http://archiveofourown.org/works/11525115 AS
A COLLAB WITH THEMOUTHKING***

I'm leaving this first chapter here just so I don't lose the comments, but if you want
MORE of Mixed Media, you can find it at that link.
 Velour
Chapter Summary

Link just can't keep his hands to himself. This is rated T.

Chapter Notes

Inspired by the following prompts:

Link can't stop petting Rhett's chest whenever he's wearing that maroon velvet shirt in
BS2 -mythicaliz
Velour shirt after shooting -anon

“Dude, what are you doing?” Rhett tried his best to sound annoyed, but the truth is, he didn’t
seriously want Link to stop.

“I don’t know, man, that shirt’s just so soft!” Link ran another hand down Rhett’s back, almost
petting him like an animal. “I can’t stop touching it!” He snickered, very much enjoying the soft
feeling of the velour. It was painfully hot in the back of the mail truck, and he couldn’t imagine
how hot Rhett must be in that incredibly warm shirt. If the tables were turned, he wouldn’t want
anyone touching him, but he still couldn’t bring himself to stop.

“Fine, you want to touch? Here. I’m so tight, so stressed, Link…” Rhett hinted, turning his chest
toward his friend. Link sighed, torn between giving in because he couldn’t resist how soft the shirt
was, or rolling his eyes and forgetting it altogether because of that dang massage song. Rhett just
couldn’t resist, could he? Link ran his fingers down the front of Rhett’s shirt anyway, gently
swiping his hand down and then across Rhett’s chest.

“Mmm…” Rhett let out a sound that was similar to a purr, clearly enjoying Link’s touch,
seemingly oblivious to the obscene levels of heat in the back of the truck.

“Don’t make this weird, man. One more touch and I’m done.”

“But…”

“Seriously. One more. Done. That’s it.” Link swiped his hand back and forth across Rhett’s chest,
turning his attention down to Rhett’s stomach, over, and back up again. As he pulled his hand
away, he turned his attention towards the boxes. He stacked them, unstacked them, and restacked
them. “Dammit!” he growled, then reached his hand out to Rhett’s shirt again. He just couldn’t
stop himself, the urge to touch the shirt too strong. This time, he went all-in, planting a hand on
each of Rhett’s shoulders, running his hands down the front of Rhett’s shirt without warning.

“I knew you didn’t mean it.” Rhett snorted, his nose crinkling up as he laughed, the weight of the
laughter shaking the entire mail truck.
“Screw you, man,” Link said with a little shove against Rhett’s arm. It didn’t stop him, though, and
as he moved his hands across Rhett’s shoulders again, Rhett took each of Link’s wrists in his
hands.

“Try right here,” he said, placing Link’s hands on each of his sides, at waist level.

“Here?” Link slowly ran his hands down Rhett’s sides, then back up to where Rhett had placed
them.

“Yeah, that’s… that’s good. That’s real nice…” Rhett closed his eyes, his head leaning back
slightly.

“You’re making this weird again.” Link traced tiny circles with his fingers, going towards Rhett’s
back, then returning to his sides, again and again.

“Mrmm, sorry…” Rhett couldn’t help it. It just felt so good. Link wrapped his arms fully around
Rhett now, leaning in, and without warning, ran his cheek along Rhett’s chest, feeling the shirt with
his face. If Rhett was bothered by it, he sure didn’t seem to show it, still just murmuring at Link’s
soft touches. Just as Link started to pull away, move his face off of Rhett’s chest, Rhett wrapped
his arms around Link. “No. Stay.”

Link obliged, basically burying his face into Rhett’s chest. While Rhett had basically purred
earlier, Link was now rubbing his head against his chest like a cat begging for attention.

“What on earth do you think they’re doing in there?” Chase muttered, sitting in a chair off-camera.

“I don’t know, but they missed their cue like… ten minutes ago? I’m kind of afraid to check, the
way the truck is rocking.” Stevie just stared that the truck, blinking.

“Well, someone’s going to have to let them know, aren’t they?” Chase couldn’t help but wonder
aloud.

“Let’s just give them like… five more minutes. And then you can go check.”

“Why me?”

“Because I really don’t want to see whatever’s happening in there.” Stevie had seen their tension
build up over the years, and the last thing she wanted to do was confront her bosses head-on when
they were doing, well, whatever it was they were doing. But when a minute or two passed and the
truck showed no sign of slowing down, she decided to spare Chase the mental scarring of seeing
his bosses do something he totally didn’t want to think about them doing. “Uh, knock, knock?” She
called as she approached, hoping they’d compose themselves before she got closer. No luck… the
truck continued its bizarre movement. When she actually got to the truck, she physically knocked
on it, hoping that would help. Still no response and no sign of the rocking slowing.

“Okay, I’m coming in, then! Let’s get this show on the road!” She pulled on the side of the truck,
heaving herself into it. A small gasp escaped her mouth as she saw what was happening inside the
truck. Link was rubbing his face wildly against Rhett’s shirt, and Rhett was encouraging him,
small growls and laughs escaping from him.

“Oh gosh, that tickles!” Rhett grasped his chest with laughter as Link buried his face into Rhett’s
stomach, shaking his head back and forth rapidly, his glasses perched on Rhett’s face. As he
composed himself, he spotted Stevie standing there out of the corner of his eye. “Oh, sorry. Um.
Sorry. Hi,” Rhett placed his hand on Link’s shoulder, causing Link to still and pull back.

“Stevie! Hey, um. So are we, uh, we good to go on the next scene, then?” He blinked, placing the
clear frames back on his face.

“Yeah, you guys missed your cue about fifteen minutes ago… and, uh, I’m just going to pretend
this didn’t happen.” Stevie raised her hands slightly, as if in surrender as she backed up, then
climbed out of the truck.

There was no way in heck she could explain what they were doing, so she just slunk back to her
chair, figuring everyone could draw their own conclusions about the rocking truck. Whatever they
imagined was arguably less strange than the truth.
 The Best Sponsor
Chapter Notes

This chapter is rated E. It gets smutty.

Written for the prompt "MeUndies (Definitely a Sponsor)" from like-a-wild-potato.

Inspired by this gif.

See the end of the chapter for more notes

That little sliver of skin. Just one tiny little sliver of skin. It peeked out just under Link’s shirt, just
above his jeans, and Rhett couldn’t keep himself from staring as Link folded his clothes. That band
of fabric, his MeUndies peeking out a smidge. Rhett could tell he was wearing a black and white
pair, and he licked his lips just thinking about how great those MeUndies must look, clinging to the
curvature of Link’s ass, hugging his hipbones. Rhett didn’t realize he had made an audible
whimper until Link’s eyes met his.

“You okay, bo?”

“Oh, yeah. Um. Sorry. Lost in space.” Rhett tried to cover, knowing Link wasn’t likely to question
him being spacy during the whirlwind trip in New York City. “I might just lay down for awhile.”
Rhett tossed himself onto the bed, feet dangling off the end. But he couldn’t help himself, he just
kept watching Link reach for items, organizing them carefully to make sure he hadn’t missed
anything, already preparing for the end of their trip tomorrow. Link filled out his skinny jeans
perfectly, and every time he leaned forward, there was that delightful strip of underwear peeking
out the top again. Rhett squeezed his eyes shut, trying to stop himself from looking, but images of
Link filled his mind.

Link’s body was laid back on the bed, his feet still touching the ground as Rhett kneeled between
his legs. His plaid shirt and leather jacket were long discarded on the floor, Rhett having carefully
unbuttoned the shirt and stripped Link of them the first chance he had gotten. As soon as the hotel
room door had closed behind them, he had trailed kisses down Link’s neck, while removing the
shirt, paying special attention to his collarbones with bites and kisses, running his tongue across
Link’s nipples before carefully tugging them with his teeth, knowing Link loved a little pain with
his pleasure. He loved it when he could make Link shiver from the sensation.

And now, here he was, kneeling in front of Link. Those jeans were down just enough that his latest
pair of MeUndies from his monthly shipment were peeking out above the jeans and oh gosh it
looked good. He inhaled shakily, taking in the sight of his best friend stretched out on the bed.
Rhett’s beard brushed along Link’s hipbone, his lips kissing, his tongue exploring as it slipped
gently under the waistband. Link squirmed and writhed in response to the sensation right at such a
ticklish part of his body as Rhett kissed his way toward center. Inches below Link’s bellybutton,
Rhett lifted his head and smiled up at Link, who was gently running his fingers through Rhett’s
hair.

Rhett moved to the other hip, working his way inwards again. He knew Link was enjoying the way
his beard tickled and he alternated soft kisses and slight pressure from his tongue as he trailed his
way toward center again. It was clear in the soft sounds Link made, the little giggles that escaped
 anytime Rhett would hit an extra ticklish place. When that happened, Rhett would linger, teasing.
Link purred his name, almost begging him to continue. Rhett’s hands cupped Link’s ass, gripping
his jeans, fingers tugging at the back pockets. As he reached center again, he unbuttoned Link’s
jeans, tugging them down and off. He slid Link’s MeUndies down, just enough for easy access to
what he was really after.

Link groaned with encouragement, tugging Rhett’s hair. They’d known each other long enough to
leave so much unsaid while still managing to communicate clearly, and in this moment, they didn’t
need words. They spoke through touches and whimpers. Link rolled his hips, silently urging Rhett
to continue. Rhett placed his palm on one of Link’s hips to still him, wrapping his other hand
around Link’s cock, stroking carefully, just enough to elicit the whimpers he wanted to hear.

Rhett ran his tongue along Link’s length, then swirled it around the tip. He wrapped his lips around
Link, taking him as deeply as he could, using his hand to take care of anywhere his mouth couldn’t
reach. He used his tongue to press Link’s cock gently against the roof of his mouth, then bobbed
his head, craving every moan and mewl that would slip from Link’s lips. Link’s back arched off of
the bed as Rhett sucked and licked just below the tip, his hips bucking as he attempted to get
Rhett’s mouth all over him again. Rhett took his time, then picked up the pace when Link jerked
his hair a little bit harder.\

“Oh, fuck… Rhett… I’m gonna…” Link couldn’t finish his thought, too lost in the moment. Rhett
replaced his mouth with his hand, stroking faster, until Link released onto his stomach. As Link
basked in the afterglow, Rhett couldn’t help but stare, eyes dragging up Link’s lissome body. God,
he was so sexy .

Rhett’s eyes snapped open. How long had he been lying there? Obviously not long, Link was still
packing, those MeUndies still peeking up over the waistband of his jeans. Rhett sat up slightly,
perching himself on his elbows, and Link must have heard his movement because he started
talking.

“Well, I think I’ve got pretty much everything packed except what I need for tonight and tomorrow
morning, so…” Link turned toward Rhett, then his eyes landed right on Rhett’s crotch. “You, uh,
must have had a good dream during that little catnap.” He smirked, then turned back to his suitcase
and zipped it up, placing it back on the floor. Rhett felt his cheeks redden, knowing he could never
tell Link exactly how great his daydream was, or what it was about. He tucked the mental image of
Link’s MeUndies into the back of his mind.

He’d definitely have to think about it later when he had some alone time so he could take care of
his present situation. Someday, maybe he’d let Link know about these little fantasies and
daydreams, but today was not that day, so he silently prayed Link would take a walk and give him
some time to deal with the tightness in his jeans. Either way, Rhett smiled, thinking about how
MeUndies was definitely his favorite sponsor, if only because it gave him the opportunity to
imagine Link wearing them.

Chapter End Notes

Special thanks to clemwasjustagirl/shewasjustagirl who is always so lovely to help me

when I get stuck on this sort of thing.
 Rocks
Chapter Summary

Rhett and Link plan for some "brotherly bonding time" only to find out they
accidentally got there on date night. Rated General Audiences.

Chapter Notes

For the prompt "Just pretend to be my date" from Killthenaughtyboy

"Seriously, you didn't check online before we came all the way out here?" Rhett ran his fingers
through his hair, fluffing it up as tall as possible like it would make the news any less frustrating.

"Just pretend to be my date so we can get in!"

"Pretend to be your date? Don't you think it's obvious we aren't a couple, Link?"

"Have you read the comments on our videos? Half of the people in the comments ship us anyway.
I'm pretty sure no one is going to second-guess it, man. After all, we're partners!" Link said it with
a cocky grin, but Rhett wasn't having it.

"Business partners. Just business partners."

What kind of rock climbing place had couples-only nights anyway? He'd heard of ladies nights or
nights that had discounts for couples, but never a couples-only-or-you-can't-get-in thing. This is
ridiculous.

But they'd driven all the way out there, and they'd taken the time to convince their wives to let them
have a night to just hang out, outside of work and the frustrations their latest projects, however fun,
had brought. They needed a night of pure fun, and the only way to turn this night around was to get
inside. So Rhett reluctantly agreed to be Link's date... or, pretend to be anyway.

"Great!" Link grasped Rhett's hand.

"Is that really necessary?" Rhett snapped, but as they approached the door, it seemed clear that it
was. Dozens of happy couples were already inside, and most of the couples seemed blissfully
happy, taking advantage of the spacious rock gym.

Rhett had been here once with Jessie and the kids, but this was the first time Link had come, and he
was going to make sure they had fun. He figured if they had to hold hands to get in, so be it.

After they paid admission and walked through the doors, Rhett released Link's hand and placed his
hand on the small of Link's back, urging Link forward in a way that would seem loving to
onlookers, but gave his sweaty hand respite from holding Link's. He felt nervous, sudden
butterflies, as though they weren't just pretending, but were instead actually on a date.
But as soon as they started climbing, the rocks became the entire focus. Rhett showed Link the
way up the wall, but when Rhett froze at the top, worried about throwing himself backward off of
the wall to repel downwards, Link broke through the fear fogging his brain.

"YOU CAN DO IT, SERPENT KING!" Link yelled, already on the ground. "COME ON! PUSH!"

He repeated the phrase that Rhett had used to help him overcome his own fear, snakes, and it must
have worked, because Rhett pushed back, and before he knew it, he was on the ground. His harness
was still on, but that didn't stop him from running over, picking Link up in a spinning hug... and
quickly realizing he'd tangled them up completely.

He was embarrassed, felt like he must have been blushing head-to-toe, as they had to continue to
hug while the employees rushed over to untangle them. Letting go would mean just tangling them
further, so they continued to keep their arms wrapped around each other.

"This is weird," Link murmured close to Rhett, quietly so the workers wouldn't hear this "couple"
feeling strange about hugging.

"Yeah, it is." Rhett chuckled, no sense of irritation. After all, he'd gotten them into this mess. They
both grinned awkwardly at each other, waiting for them to be free.

"Okay, guys, we're going to need you to spin counterclockwise three times, and then you should be
free."

Rhett and Link shuffled, turning one, two, three times and finally releasing, their harnesses
allowing them space to breathe.

They spent the rest of the time free-climbing, avoiding the harnesses altogether. No way they were
getting themselves into that mess again!

As they got to the car, Rhett opened Link's door.

"Dork, we're outside, you can drop the couple act."

"Right, uh, sorry." Rhett shifted back and forth, stuffing his hands in his pockets. It wasn't lost on
Link, who suddenly raised up on his tiptoes, planted a quick kiss on Rhett's cheek, and climbed
into the car as if nothing had happened.

When Rhett got in on his side, still clearly stunned by Link's quick move-- had he done that? had
Rhett just imagined it?-- he reached his hand over to Link's leg, patting it twice. "Thanks for the
'date,' bo. It was actually pretty fun."

"Yeah, Rhett. It was, wasn't it?"

 Stuck
Chapter Summary

Rhett and Link are going to be stuck for awhile, so Rhett finds a way to pass the time.
Rated T.

Chapter Notes

Inspired by the prompt "Looks like we'll be stuck here awhile." submitted by an anon.
Also inspired by the anon who asked for a Trapped in an Elevator story.

"You're sure we won't suffocate in here, though?" Link's voice shook. He wasn't typically that
afraid of things, aside from snakes or something, but being told they could be in there for hours
made his mouth go dry.

"Nope, elevators aren't sealed fully for this reason. You'll have plenty of air flow. If we cannot get
the elevator moving soon, we will ask the fire department to deliver some water to you." The
mystery voice sounded tinny through the elevator's emergency speaker.

Link sighed, leaning against the wall of the elevator. "Looks like we'll be stuck in here awhile, bo."

"Yeah, sounds like it. Good to know we're not, like, going to suffocate or anything, though." Rhett
leaned against the opposite wall of the elevator, their legs stretching across the floor side-by-side.

For awhile, they passed the time just talking, shooting ideas back and forth about future GMM
episodes. Link jotted notes down on his phone, little reminders about the best ones. After an hour,
though, they were thoroughly bored.

Link stood up, jumping up and down to get the feeling back in his legs. Rhett followed suit after,
neither of them wanting to jump at the same time for fear of disturbing the elevator.

The power was out in the building, had gone out while they were on the way down, and until
power was restored to the building, they were stuck here, waiting.

By the second hour, they'd each drained their water bottles. By the third, they'd filled them simply
out of necessity from having drank the water in the first place.

But as the forth hour crept upon them, they were out of ideas. The tiny box of a room was proving
too much, and Link was pacing the small space, completely stressed out.

"You look so tight, so stressed... do you want me to come and rub your neck?" Rhett asked with a
laugh, but Link just snorted disapprovingly.

"Really, you're going to joke at a time like this?" Link shook his head and continued to pace. Rhett
needed to come up with another plan to calm his jittery BFF.
"Hey, hey, bo. Let's sit down, let's calm down. We'll think of something to do to pass the time."
Link couldn't imagine anything would get his mind off of being stuck in the elevator, but he sat
back down anyway, his legs falling apart to each side.

Rhett had an idea. He fished around in his bag and finally pulled out an apple, shining it up with
his sleeve.

"You... want us to share an apple? No, thanks, man. You can have it."

Rhett leaned over, laughing and rolled the apple as hard as he could at Link's crotch. "Oof!" Link
grabbed the apple. "What the heck was that for?"

"Come on, don't you remember?" Rhett waggled his eyebrows, and that was all the encouragement
Link needed. He rolled the apple, and it hit Rhett squarely between the legs. He grabbed his crotch
and leaned over against the back wall of the elevator with a grunt. When he recovered, he picked it
up and rolled it back at Link, this time harder. Link only laughed, then repeated it.

The boys were lost in the game, having a blast reliving old memories where they'd done the same
thing at sleepovers at each other's houses, until they weren't sure they could stand it much longer.
It was painful, sure, but fun all the same.

Rhett let out a shout, a groan, as the elevator sprang to life. When he tucked the apple back in his
bag, he smiled at Link. "Well, that wasn't how I had planned to spend my afternoon, but at least we
had some fun."

"Yeah, we did, didn't we?" Link clapped his hand onto Rhett's shoulder, forever grateful that his
friend always knew just how to calm him down.
 Moving In
Chapter Summary

Link has an idea to bring their families even closer. Rated General audiences.

Chapter Notes

Inspired by the prompt "Let's move in together," from TheMouthKing.

"Let's move in together."

"What?" Rhett was caught off-guard by his friend's remark.

"I'm serious. It's not the worst idea in the world. We spent most of our time together anyway, and
the kids would be happy. Heck, Barbara and Jade could sleep together every night if we did!"

"Am I hearing you correctly, that you want us to get a house together so... so our dogs can cuddle?"
Rhett reached a hand back, resting it on the back of his own neck like he was stretching or
scratching or something. He couldn't figure out if Link was joking or being serious, and he didn't
want to seem over-eager in agreeing if this was all some big joke.

"No, I'm saying it makes sense for a lot of reasons. It would save us money, I've been doin' the
math on utilities on the kind of house that I think could fit for our families and it'd be a big decrease
on what we're each paying now. It would shave a lot of time off of our commute every day if you
and I were leavin' from the same place instead of driving over to get each other." Link seemed
pretty insistent, and Rhett was starting to see that it wasn't a joke.

"How would it work, anyway? Wouldn't our families be practically on top of each other? I don't see
Jessie and Christy going for that." Rhett couldn't visualize it in his mind, thinking about the houses
he and Link each lived in and wondering how it would work.

"Here, look." Link tapped a few keys on his computer, pulling up a model of a house. The house
seemed to have two separate wings, each with their own bedrooms, bathrooms, even a living room
in each. The home shared living spaces-- kitchen, a shared living space, and a basement. It was
almost like someone had taken a duplex and cut the dividing wall out, instead shoving the shared
spaces into one. And in all honesty, it didn't look half bad.

"So... we'd each have our own space?" Rhett scratched at his beard, straightening a hair from it,
then stroking his chin.

"Yup. Each of us would have a master bedroom, our kids would all have their own rooms, and
we'd share the kitchen. But you better as heck not touch my Mini Wheats, man." Link flipped
through renderings of each room and space as Rhett leaned over the back of his chair, looking at
the screen.
"You think the girls would actually be okay with it?" Rhett was totally on board, but as close as
their wives were, he wasn't sure that they'd be as interested in sharing a house together. For the
most part, they were one big happy family Shared vacations, shared lives, shared everything. When
one of their kids had a sports event, they all piled into the stands to cheer. When someone had an
illness or an injury or even during Lily's back surgery, they were all there to support and help.

"It isn't the craziest idea we've had. And it seems like the logical next step. We've already bought
cars together, man, isn't that what partners do? Cars, houses?" Link's crooked grin was something
Rhett couldn't say no to.

"Well, in fairness, we're business partners." Rhett corrected him quietly, but it was useless. They
both knew they were far more than business partners, best friends. They were family. A shared
house just made sense. Rhett pondered a moment or two longer as Link looped back around to the
start of the slideshow. "Fine, send me the details, I'll talk to Jessie."

Link typed Rhett's email address in as Rhett walked back to his desk. He knew he had a lot of work
to get done, but for the rest of the afternoon, he found himself browsing to find the perfect couch
for their future shared living space.
 Barbecue
Chapter Summary

When Link steals a swipe of barbecue sauce, Rhett shows him how willing he is to get
every last drop. Rated E/NC-17. This one's smutty, y'all.

Chapter Notes

Inspired by the prompt "Hey, I was gonna eat that!" from TheMouthKing

Link licked his lips as he watched the barbecue sauce drip down Rhett's fingers as Rhett tore
through the meat on the rib he was holding so carefully. Rhett had worked so hard to prepare the
ribs all weekend, struggling to get them just right. He went through a few slabs in an effort to
perfect his effort, using some of the North Carolina sauce Mama Di had shipped from back home.
Finding a great vinegar-based sauce in LA wasn't easy, and nothing beat the real deal from back
home anyway. Enjoying the ribs in their shared office space was just a perk of being Rhett's best
friend.

But as it looked like Rhett might lose that drop, dangling precariously off of the edge of his hand,
Link reached out and swiped the sauce with one finger, then let his finger dart to his own mouth as
he licked it off.

"Hey! I was gonna eat that!" Rhett knew there was no way he could have caught the drop, but he
wanted to savor this, and besides, he'd been nice enough to bring Link half of his ribs to share for
their lunch that day. He was being plenty generous.

"Sorry," Link said with a chuckle, not actually feeling sorry at all. As he picked up another rib and
dug in, it wasn't long before sauce started to trickle down his own hand. Ribs definitely weren't the
neatest food on the planet, but the mess was well worth it. As the sauce dripped down the back of
Link's hand, Rhett leaned over the desk and licked it straight off of Link's hand.

"What the heck was that for?!" Link raised an eyebrow, looking at Rhett, then at his hand where
Rhett had licked him, then back at Rhett.

"You were about to lose a drop. Payback is kind of a bitch, my friend."

"You didn't have to lick me!" Link's voice went up in pitch, getting shriller with the surprise that oh
my gosh his best friend had just licked him what the heck?

"But it looked so good..." Rhett returned to his own rib, continued to eat. He finished, setting the
bone down on his plate. Before he could pick up another, Link stood up and walked around the
desk.

"Hey, Rhett, you have a little somethin'" Link started to gesture, then leaned down and licked the
sauce off of the corner of Rhett's lips. "Nevermind. I got it." He grinned cockily as he returned to
his side of the table and picked up his own rib.

Rhett was in stunned silence for awhile, just watching Link eat, Link acting as though he hadn’t
just done what he just did. The sauce ran down Link's hand, then fell. Rhett's eyes followed the
sauce until it disappeared under the desk. There was only one place that sauce could have landed,
and if Link was going to push, to lick sauce off of his lips, he wasn't backing down without a fight.

Rhett stood, walking to Link's side of the desk, then put one hand on each arm of his friend's chair,
turning Link to face him.

"Are you gonna eat that?" Rhett glanced down at the smear of dripped sauce on Link's fly.

This was it. He was giving Link an out, a chance to end all of this, an opportunity to clean up the
sauce himself and forget any of this ever happened. But the sparkle in Link's eyes said he wasn't
going down without a fight, and Rhett wasn't about to back down either.

"Nah, you can have it." Link gave that sly wink he'd done a million times into the camera, but this
time there were no cameras around, no one watching. Rhett inhaled sharply.

"You mean, like..." Rhett glanced back down, then back up.

"I'm not going to eat it. I figured since you're so concerned about every last drop of that sauce, I'd
offer it to you." Link wasn't backing down, shifting in his seat and letting his legs fall open. Rhett
got down on his knees, leaned forward, and licked the sauce off of Link's tight jeans. Link's
hardened state wasn't lost on Rhett, neither was the soft groan Link let out as his eyelashes
fluttered.

Rhett, certain he hadn't gotten all of the sauce, gave Link's jeans another lick, pressing firmly with
his tongue and looking up at Link, who was reaching, not for the rib, but for the bottle of sauce
they'd been sharing. He dipped his finger in the open bottle, holding it out towards Rhett. Rhett
wrapped his lips around Link's finger, his tongue lingering to gather every last drop.

"Mmm, that's good, that's real good, baby..." Link said softly, his other hand smoothing Rhett's
hair. The implications hang heavily in the air between them, and Rhett reached up to the table, his
eyes only leaving Link's for a second as he dipped his own finger into the jar. He lifted Link's shirt
slightly, wiped the sauce from his finger onto Link's lower stomach.

"You going to eat that, or...?" Rhett was practically begging. All Link had to do was say he wanted
the sauce and all of this would come screeching to a halt, but Rhett hoped Link would ask him to
clean it off for him.

"You eat it," Link said. His eyes were dark, commanding. And Rhett wasn't saying no to that.

Rhett ran his tongue along Link’s lower stomach, varying the pressure of his tongue to make sure
he got all of the sauce, but also to beg Link to let him take this further. Link’s eyes closed, his hand
wrapping around the back of Rhett’s head. Rhett knew he had his answer, unbuttoning Link’s
jeans, then unzipping them. Every second of silence, of Link holding Rhett’s head close, was a sign
that this was exactly what Link wanted.

As Rhett tugged at Link’s jeans, Link lifted himself off of the chair, allowing Rhett the space he
needed to slide them down, MeUndies and all, revealing every incredible inch of Link’s length.
Neither of them were stopping this, they were heading straight towards a collision, and it was all
because of that barbecue sauce.

But Rhett didn’t need the barbecue sauce to get up his nerve now. He wrapped his hand, which
was still slightly sticky from the sauce, around Link’s cock, stroking it slowly as he looked up to
Link for approval, making sure this was still okay, that they were still doing this, whatever this was
that had gotten so wildly out of hand.

Link just tipped his head backward again, allowed a moan to escape his slightly parted lips, still
reddened from the barbecue sauce.

Rhett wrapped his lips around the tip of Link’s cock, stroking, then taking it deeper. As he lifted
his head, he kept his lips still wrapped around it, applying pressure with his tongue to really hit
every nerve he possibly could. Just as he reached the tip, he dipped his head back down, trying to
take as much of Link as he could. He hollowed his cheeks, and when he wasn’t sure he could take
any more, he moved off, using his hand to do the work as he lapped at the tip. He pointed his
tongue, running it firmly along Link’s length, not letting go of him. As Link’s breathing grew
sharper, faster, his moans and whimpers became louder, Rhett picked up the pace, both with his
lips and his hand.

“Oh, fuck… I… I’m…” Rhett stroked Link until he finished onto his own stomach. As Link
reached for napkins, wiped at his stomach to clean it up, Rhett looked at him, grey eyes twinkling
with mischief.

“How do you know I wasn’t gonna take care of that for you?” He asked.

“Gotta save room for the rest of the ribs, right, bo?” Link picked up another rib from the plate,
offering it to Rhett. Link knew Rhett never turned down food, especially barbecue, and Rhett
accepted it. “But hey, next time you’re bringing barbecue sauce? I have a few ribs I’d like to lick
this sauce off of…” Link ran his clean hand up Rhett’s side.

“Next time, huh?” So Link was suggesting there’d be a next time?

“Yeah. What was it you said about payback?”

 Chapter 14
Chapter Summary

Rhett gets a strange text in the middle of the night. Rated general audiences.

Chapter Notes

Based on the prompt "I had a nightmare about you and I just want to make sure you're
okay" from Rhink-star.

See the end of the chapter for more notes

Linkster

Today 3:17 AM

Are you awake?

Rhett??

I am now.

What’s up?

Can you come outside?

Umm… what?

Please?

Like… outside of my house?

Yeah

K, I’ll be right there.

Rhett tugged on the pair of pajama pants draped over the foot of his bed, then tiptoed quietly down
the stairs. He unlocked the door, hoping the telltale “click” it made wouldn’t wake his family.
What could possibly be this important at 3:30 in the morning?

When Rhett stepped outside, he spotted Link’s car in the driveway, still running, headlights off.
Otherwise, the world around them was silent, or as silent as the area they lived in could ever be.
The glow of the city, one that rarely powered down, was visible on the horizon, but the stars above
weren’t blocked out, not really.

Rhett climbed into the passenger seat of the car, something he’d done a million times. Link was
practically panting, struggling to catch his breath. It sounded like Link was just coming down from
a panic attack, trying to calm himself however unsuccessfully. Rhett was familiar with the anxiety
Link sometimes felt. He’d been there, comforted his friend through more than one panic attack.

Today seemed different. In the wee hours of the morning, outside of his house, he placed his hand
on Link’s arm, waiting to speak until Link was ready to talk.

“I’m just so glad you’re okay.” Link closed his eyes, like he was trying to force the vision of Rhett
being totally okay firmly into his brain.

“Did you have a reason to believe I wasn’t?” Rhett wondered what was going on with Link, why he
was so jittery, so fearful in the middle of the night. In all the years that they’d been friends, Link
had never come over at random in the middle of the night, demanding to know Rhett was okay.
There must have been something bothering Link.

“I had a nightmare about you and I just want to make sure you’re okay.” Link rushed the words
out, forcing all of the air from his lungs along with them. Rhett could read the vulnerability written
all over Link’s face. It seemed like Link was mentally kicking himself for coming over here, like
he should have known that Rhett was okay even despite the dream.

“Bo…” Rhett leaned over the center console, wrapping his arms around Link. He held him tightly.
“I’m glad you came to make sure I’m okay. Really. And see? I’m right here, I’m fine. Do you
want to talk about it?”

“Not really. If I do, I feel like it’ll just make it real. I just needed to know you were okay, that you
weren’t… weren’t…” Link couldn’t get the words out, or wouldn’t. They held each other for a
long while, Rhett smoothing his hand over the back of Link’s shirt. Link’s breathing slowed,
became more steady. Rhett could feel Link’s heart stop racing, too. As he stilled in Rhett’s arms,
his body started to become heavy, tired. Rhett pulled back from the hug slightly, saw the way
Link’s was forcing his eyes to stay open.

“How about you come inside? The guest bed is already made, I’m sure. Crash here tonight.” The
last thing Rhett wanted was for Link to fall asleep on the way home, so there was no question in
his mind that the now-exhausted Link should stay over tonight. “I can text Christy for you so she’ll
 know where you are, and we can carpool from here in the morning.”

“Thanks for… for not being weird about this.”

“Nothin’ weird about making sure I’m okay. I would have done the same thing to you.” He placed
his hand back on Link’s arm and gave it one small squeeze, then opened the passenger door. Link
turned off the ignition and climbed out of the car, too, following Rhett inside. Rhett was thankful
that Link felt comfortable enough to check on him, but wondered if he’d ever know what dream
sparked this much fear in his best friend. It didn’t matter, though. All that mattered was that they
each knew the other was safe.

Chapter End Notes

Shamelessly stole my text message formatting from TheMouthKing's Screw It and Do

It. (Also shamelessly promoting it. It's hot. Go read it).
 Blue
Chapter Summary

Rhett would do anything to see the color blue.

Chapter Notes

Inspired by the prompt "You know I'm colorblind, right?" from rhink-star.
Special thanks to MythosEthan/Babashook for the inspiration for this sweet fic.
Rated general audiences.

See the end of the chapter for more notes

Rhett closed his eyes behind his sunglasses, imagining. He wished he had some frame of reference
for this, some idea. He knew that at some point, he’d been able to see color, but he couldn’t
remember. That was all so long ago, well before he met Link. It was a tumor that had left him
without any sense of color, a tumor that damaged his thalamus. He’d recovered, surgery helping to
remove it when he was very young, but he’d never gotten his ability to see color back. He couldn’t
remember blue. Dammit, how he wanted to remember blue.

Acquired achromatopsia had its challenges, Rhett’s ability to sometimes see colors that would warn
him of impending danger was a problem, or his trouble differentiating between one color and
another could be a struggle. But the real issue, in his mind, was that he had no idea what Link’s
eyes looked like. It was the only color he wanted to figure out, the only color he was desperate to
see. The rest of the world could stay black and white, he didn’t care. He just wanted to see blue.

He figured Link’s eyes were sometimes the color of the ocean. He’d seen it in their trip to Hawaii,
when Link stood in front of the waves and in that moment, the grey he saw in Link’s eyes matched
the grey he saw of the waves, at least through his ever-present sunglasses, and he figured Link’s
eyes must be the ocean.

But then sometimes they weren’t the ocean. They’d go surfing, and Link’s eyes wouldn’t match at
all. Instead, his eyes were the sky above them, sparkling. He could see the sparkle, even if he
couldn’t see the color, and he wondered how much more magnificent Link’s eyes would be if they
were as blue as everyone said.

“Hey, Rhett, check this out!” Link called over from his desk one day. Rhett moved from his
standing desk against the wall, leaning over Link’s shoulder.

“What is it?” He studied the screen as Link filled him in on the gist of the story. Doctors were now
using special sound therapy to help people with achromatopsia “see” colors by associating them
with sounds. He’d probably never get to see color, not really, but he could associate a sound with it.
It didn’t take him any time at all to call his doctor, schedule an appointment, and get into the
therapy. It was expensive, but Rhett would have paid any amount to get the answers he wanted.

He sat in the waiting room fidgeting, shaking his leg and waiting. “Mr. McLaughlin?”
 The doctor took him back, and he was a bundle of nerves. “You know I’m colorblind, right? But…
but you can teach me how to understand colors?”

“Yes, that’s something we can work on. You won’t be able to see them, but we can help your brain
associate sound waves with colors and help you perceive them more easily, tell the difference
between them.” The doctor tried to explain the process, but there was really only one reason Rhett
was here.

“Will you show me what blue sounds like?”

Chapter End Notes

Rhett has achromatopsia in this fic. It’s a type of color blindness where those with the
condition see only grayscale. It impacts 1 in 33,000 people and is very rare. Those with
it need to wear special sunglasses indoors even.
 What Link Wants
Chapter Summary

Inspired by the prompt "Rhett puts Link's glasses on his own face while Link is going
down." Obviously very explicit and smutty.

Chapter Notes

See the end of the chapter for notes

“Are you sure you really want me to?” Rhett was always interested in trying new things,
particularly new things Link suggested. They had a careful balance between them… Rhett was
always interested in trying new positions (his position of the day calendar stashed in the top drawer
of his desk was a good indicator of that specific layer of his sex life). But Link, he always wanted
to try a new kink.

“Yeah, I’m ready.” Link rubbed his hands together with anticipation. The handcuffs weren’t new,
neither was the blindfold. But the rest? Totally new, and Link couldn’t wait. Stripped down to his
camo MeUndies, his hands were behind his back. Rhett secured the handcuffs behind him,
clasping them tight enough that Link could really feel the pressure of the metal on his wrists, but
not too tight to leave any lasting wounds. Link loved the feeling, the scrape of the handcuffs on his
arms, and he loved knowing that he wasn’t going to be able to do a damn thing about his desire.
That was okay, he could wait, focus all of his attention on Rhett.

Rhett grabbed the blindfold he’d borrowed from the basement. This was a sudden request, trying
this now. Link’s favorite blindfold, Rhett’s black tie, was at home in his bedside table. Rhett
figured this would work, though, as long as they were careful not to get anything on it. He gently
slid Link’s glasses off of his face, trying to find a safe place to put them. When he couldn’t, he
simply placed them on his own face.

“God, you were so right, you do wear those well…” Link groaned the words, loving just how good
his giant of a best friend looked in his glasses.

“Yeah, well, as I can see, you can’t.” Rhett tugged the green glassesed blindfold over Link’s eyes,
blocking out everything from view. He hoped that if Link couldn’t see him, that Link couldn’t see
how nervous he was about trying this. He didn’t want to hurt Link, but Link longed for this,
requested it, would have begged if he were the begging type. “Okay, safe signal… show me.”

They had a safe word between them, sure. But there was no way Link was going to be able to say
it, and with his hands cuffed behind his back, he couldn’t give their usual signal for times they
needed to stop but couldn’t speak. Link thudded his foot on the ground twice. “That work for
you?”

“Yeah, that works,” Rhett just wanted them to be safe. He didn’t mind indulging Link’s flair for
new kinks as long as they were safe about it. And this one, well, he worried. Anything for Link,
though.

Rhett unzipped his jeans, pushing them down to the ground and kicking them aside. He stepped
forward.
“Are we going to do this or not? God, you’re taking forever, Rhett!” Link whined, still on his
knees, hands behind his back, already half-hard from sheer anticipation.

“Mmm, just want to enjoy this view,” Rhett hoped his nervousness didn’t show in the cracks in his
voice as he reached down, smoothing his fingers through Link’s dark hair. He ran his fingers down
Link’s cheek, sweeping his jaw, then used his thumb to open Link’s mouth. He slid his thumb
inside, dragging it along Link’s teeth, running it along his tongue. It was one of those times when
he was sure Link was also thanking his lucky stars that he had a big mouth. “You ready?”

Link took a sharp inhale, nodding, as Rhett slid his cock into Link’s mouth, still not removing his
thumb. He held Link’s mouth open, sliding the tip of himself along Link’s tongue, slowly pushing
back towards Link’s throat. This slow movement was just a test, just a chance to see how much
Link might be able to take, and when he slid all the way in, Link still seemed unphased. He
swallowed, and Rhett could feel it. Fuck , it felt so good. He pulled out, just as painfully slow as
he’d started.

“Was that… was that okay?” Rhett wanted to confirm, one last time, that Link was willing and able
to do this, that he wasn’t going to get hurt.

“Oh my God, Rhett, I’m not breakable, just fucking do it already!” Link spoke around the thumb
still holding his mouth open, and his exasperation was obvious, but he smiled, happy that Rhett
wanted to be absolutely sure.

“Okay,” Rhett said, this time barely over a whisper. He slipped his finger out of Link’s mouth, but
Link held it open on his own, waiting not-so-patiently for Rhett to do what he’d ask. See, Link
loved, just fucking loved , submitting to Rhett. On his own terms, at least. The lines blurred
between submission and dominance. Was Link really all that submissive when he was demanding
Rhett take charge, rewarding him when he’d done just what Link asked? Maybe, maybe not. And
Link did like being in charge, too. But sometimes he just needed Rhett to do something like this, to
make him take it, to prove he fucking could.

And he did, he did it so well, when Link could get him to break down the barriers and fear that
he’d hurt Link, Rhett really did it well.

Rhett slid his cock back into Link’s open mouth, the mouth that was ready and waiting for him,
and this time, Link closed his lips around it. Rhett started slowly at first, just gently in, then out,
not too deep, not too fast.

It was then that Link realized how much of a mistake asking for handcuffs might have been. Rhett
was taking this too slowly, and Link wished more than anything he could just grab Rhett by the
thighs and yank him in, feel him hit the back of his throat, force him to go deeper. But he couldn’t,
so he tugged at his handcuffs, whimpering and waiting.

Rhett seemed to get the message, thrusting deeper, harder this time, his hands around the back and
sides of Link’s head. Link instinctively tried to pull back, gagging slightly, then leaning into it
again to make sure Rhett knew that this was okay, that he wanted this. Rhett knew, got the
message, picked up the pace. He pushed his hips forward, using his hands to pull Link towards him
as he pulled his hair, dug his nails into Link’s scalp a little, leaving marks no one could see beneath
the thick brown locks. He pushed faster, deeper, hitting Link’s throat. Drool pooled out of Link’s
mouth, mixing with precome, dribbling down his chin. God this felt so good. Rhett had been
hesitant to try this, but all of that melted away as he slammed into Link again and again, and Link
groaned approvals and wordless praise at just how good Rhett was doing.

When he gagged another time, it was just more encouragement for Rhett to keep going, to keep
fucking him, his lips stroking every time he pulled out of Link’s mouth. He pulled out, hoping to
give Link a breath, a pause, before what he wanted to do next. Link shook his head slightly at the
loss.

“Don’t stop.” His words were firm, sharp, and he opened his mouth again. Rhett knew who was
really in charge, who really wanted this done. He peered over Link’s glasses at the man on his
knees in front of him, dominant in his submission in that obvious Link way. He positioned himself
on Link’s waiting tongue again, then thrust in, holding Link’s head in place, staying there, feeling
Link swallow, shiver, try to pull away for breath just by instinct, and when he’d waited just long
enough, he slid back out, hearing Link take a deep inhale through his nose before moving his face
forward. It was his silent way of saying do it again when his mouth was too full to speak. So Rhett
did it again, savored every bit of this feeling. He could feel Link’s teeth along the sides of his cock,
not biting or hurting, just so clearly there . He could feel how Link’s throat and mouth constricted
around him as Link tried to swallow, could feel the saliva coating him, or at least, what didn’t spill
out of the corners of Link’s lips. Those beautiful, perfect pink lips.

He let go again, this time pulling out completely, giving Link a chance to properly catch his breath.
Link panted, gasping for air.

“God, that’s so good. That feels so good, Rhett, you’re doing so good.” He said the words as an
exhale, breathing them out after each intake of air, and Rhett knew he was asking for more. Rhett
slipped back into his mouth, cutting Link off from giving him more praise mid-sentence. If it feels
so good, Rhett was going to make it feel so much better.

He pounded into Link’s mouth now, slamming into him again and again, relentlessly fucking his
face hard, fast. It felt so good, and he loved knowing how much Link was liking it, every whimper
and moan around his cock sending shivers through his spine like shockwaves, electric, buzzing
through to his brain.

When he was close, so close, he knew there was one thing he needed. He needed Link to see this,
and he needed to see Link. So, without asking for permission, after all, Link wanted this , for him
to take charge and just take , he tugged the green blindfold off and tossed it on the couch beside
him. He locked eyes with Link, seeing the desperate pleading in those blue eyes as they watered
from the constant force.

“Fuck, Link, I’m gonna… I’m…” Rhett couldn’t finish his sentence, his come spilling into Link’s
mouth, across his tongue. As Link tried to swallow, Rhett slipped out, the rest landing solidly on
Link’s chest, his cheek, his forehead. He reached out, wiped some off of Link before it could fall
into his eyes without glasses or blindfold there to keep it out. Link’s eyes moved toward the come
Rhett had swiped from his face, and his mouth opened ever-so-slightly. Rhett slid his fingers into
Link’s mouth, and Link licked them clean. Rhett didn’t bother to finish cleaning Link up, just
removed the glasses he was wearing and slid them back onto Link’s face where they belonged.

He reached for the handcuff key, freeing Link, whose wrists bore soft red marks from where he’d
struggled against the cuffs in a desire to take charge when Rhett was going too slowly for his
liking. Rhett had wondered if the cuffs were to prevent Link from pushing Rhett away, but they
both knew, deep down, they were to keep him from trying to control the situation, to let him fully
enjoy it at Rhett’s pace. His hands now free, he turned Rhett around, pushing his knees onto the
couch, bending the tall man onto the back of it.

He shed his underwear, then stroked himself as he walked to his desk to get the lube he kept in the
bottom drawer.

“My turn,” he growled.

Chapter End Notes

Thank you, themouthking and like-a-wild-potato for being so willing to help pet and
feed this little plot bunny when I wasn't sure that anyone would want this one.
 Collision Course
Chapter Summary

For rhinkipoo and rileyrooin, using the prompt "This is a bad idea." Rated M.

“God, this is a bad idea,” Link groaned against Rhett’s neck. His hand gripped Rhett’s arm, his
other hand sliding up under the hem of his shirt. “This is a really, really fucking bad idea.”

“Should we stop?” Rhett asked. Link’s kisses trailed down Rhett’s neck, his teeth dragging along
the skin, and it was very clear that, despite his groaning about it being a horrible idea, he had no
intentions of stopping this, not after he’d started it. Neither of them wanted to stop it. They were on
a collision course for bad decisions, and things had been that way for a while now. Stopping didn’t
seem to be an option in either of their minds.

Link unbuttoned Rhett’s shirt, his lips following behind his fingers, kissing now-exposed skin,
nipping, biting, teasing. Rhett whimpered. His back was pressed against the wall of their office,
and his resolve was completely melted.

It had started as a normal day before this, each of them at their respective desks. Rhett was
chipping away at emails that had waited far too long for a response and looking over which
sponsorship deals seemed like a good fit for their brand and which ones to skip.

Link was giving an episode a once-over before approving the edit for upload. Something shifted,
changed, crackled in the air between them. Rhett didn’t know what motivated Link to cross the
room, what he’d seen on the screen that led him to grab Rhett and push him against the wall, but
here they were.

Link had gone far too long, waited too much, and Rhett was never just going to fucking admit it,
admit how badly he wanted this. The tension had been clear for seasons now. For most of their
lives, actually, if they were willing to admit it. The Mythical Beasts saw it, and reviewing the edit,
it was undeniable. Link wasn’t going to let those heart eyes slide one more time, not without
confronting things head on.

Link held Rhett to the wall, an arm across his chest.

“I know you want me. I can see it. Everyone can fucking see it, Rhett. So why won’t you just tell
me? Tell me!” Link was pleading, almost yelling. Rhett was stunned into silence at first,
wondering how to respond.

Link leaned so close, so very close, his lips within reach of Rhett’s. If Rhett so much as flinched,
they’d be kissing and that was exactly what Link wanted. He wasn’t going to force it, though,
wasn’t going to be the one to close the gap between them. It had to be Rhett’s choice, and it had to
be what Rhett wanted. And dammit, it worked. It worked so well. Rhett felt the tickle of Link’s
breath, of his words, “Please, Rhett… please just say it.” Rhett couldn’t resist.

Before either of them realized it, this went from Link just wanting a confession, an admission that
Rhett wanted him, to a kiss. And from there, it went to something they couldn’t stop. They were
hurtling toward a black hole, it seemed, and neither of them wanted to stop it, to resist. Link knew
it was a bad idea, but he’d known that before he crossed the room, before he grabbed Rhett. But
this couldn’t go on any longer in silence.
 If You Like Pina Coladas
Chapter Summary

For the prompt "Kiss me, dammit" from mythical-kpuff and archionblu. Rated M.
Content warning: Mention of Date Rape Drugs (none actually present), mention of
alcohol.

“Kiss me, dammit!” Rhett pleaded with Link, begging for him to kiss Rhett before the stranger
returned. He was giving Link an out, a chance to stop the madness. Link smirked, acted like he
might kiss Rhett as he leaned in just a tiny bit closer. But at the last second, he turned away and left
Rhett on his own in the crowd, lights flashing, bodies jumping and gyrating.

Rhett had gotten them into this mess, and Link would be damned if he was going to get them out of
it. Rhett thought it would be funny to go to a gay club with friends just for fun. Neither of them had
ever expected Link would get hit on so quickly after entering. Why wouldn’t he? Rhett kicked
himself. He’s perfect, beautiful blue eyes, dark hair, crooked smile… everything about him is
gorgeous. Rhett was jealous, so damn jealous.

Link didn’t care about the flirting from the guy who had been hitting on him all evening, but he did
like how Rhett reacted to it. He loved how possessive Rhett was getting, how close he was to
being pushed over the edge, forced to confront the truth about this not being just for fun . Rhett
suggested it as simple fun, but Link knew it was a chance for them to get closer without judgment.
But if Rhett wasn’t willing to make a move, then Link wasn’t either. Asking for a kiss didn’t
count, in Link’s mind. Rhett needed to use his words.

The stranger returned to Link, two drinks in hand, and passed one to Link. Link smiled, politely
accepting it. He took a sip and it was strong . It definitely packed more of a punch than any extra
fun, fruity drink should have.

“What is it?” Link asked.

“Pina colada, extra rum.” The man winked at Link, and Link teased the straw with his tongue
before taking another sip. He was going to play it up, see if he could manage to get another drink
out of this mysterious stranger.

“I didn’t even know they put rum in pina coladas,” Link chuckled and waggled his eyebrows,
taking another sip. This could hardly be called a pina colada, clearly more alcohol than mixers and
ice. But before the stranger could respond, Link felt a hard tug on his arm. Rhett whipped him
around, practically dragging Link away from the stranger, away from the situation, to a dark corner
of the room near a table.

“What the hell are you doing, Link?”

“Getting a free drink. What are you doing?” Link had Rhett right where he wanted him. Jealous,
desperate, ready to own up to the truth, that he’d brought Link here to give them a chance to melt
into each other instead of hiding it, too close to people who wouldn’t understand.

“You didn’t see him get it! What the fuck, man, he could have put something in it while bringing it
to you!” He pried the drink from Link’s fingers and placed it on a nearby table. “Don’t be reckless,
man.”

“Why the fuck do you care, Rhett?” Link was done with the games. Either Rhett needed to admit
there was something between them tonight, right now, or he was grabbing his drink and going
home with a random stranger.

Rhett put one hand on each side of Link’s face and pulled him into a kiss, not holding anything
back as he truly went for it. He could taste the rum on Link’s lips way too strongly, then realized if
the drink had been spiked, kissing Link was a bad idea and would leave them both in a sorry state
to get home. He pulled back and looked into those sparkling blue eyes that danced with the
flashing lights in the room.

“Because I fucking love you, you idiot.”

“Finally,” Link rolled his eyes and leaned into another kiss. He was definitely going home with
someone tonight.
 Pining
Chapter Summary

For the prompt "Stop pining after me" from archionblu. Rated T.

“Welp, I can happily inform you that you can stop pining after your amazing roommate, because I
am officially a taken man.” Link flopped himself back across the couch smiling.

“Uh…” Rhett cleared his throat. Did Link know? How could he? Was Rhett somehow being
painfully obvious? “What?”

“I’m just joshin’ with you, man. Hey, Christy and I had the best date. I took her to go get
milkshakes and--”

“I was actually getting ready to go take a nap, man. Tell me later?” Rhett backed away from the
living room, nearly tripping over a chair trying to get away without taking his eyes off of Link,
who was so casually draped across the couch without a care.

“Sure thing. Sleep well, princess!” Link hollered after him.

Rhett closed the door to their shared room, locking it. How could he have been so stupid, so
obvious? Link couldn’t have any idea how badly this hurt Rhett, or how much Rhett wanted for
there to be more between them than just a friendship.

There was a soft knock at the door.

“You okay, buddyroll?”

“I’m fine, just tired,” Rhett choked out. The doorknob jiggled. Rhett heard Link fishing around the
top of the door frame, looking for the key they’d stashed there after too many times accidentally
locking themselves out. Rhett rushed to compose himself, to wipe his tears away and hide any
evidence of the hurt from what Link had said.

“You’re a liar. What’s on your mind, Rhett?” Link flopped on the bed to sit next to Rhett. “You
jealous that I’ve got a fine girl and you’re still flyin’ solo?”

“Nope.” Rhett wasn’t going to, he couldn’t say it. Link would just laugh at him, or worse, never
speak to him again. He turned his face away from Link.

“What is it man? Oh my gosh, just talk to me.” Link gave Rhett’s knee a playful shove with his
own.

“Why’d you say it, Link? That crap about me pining over you in the living room? I’m not, y’know.
I dunno why you’d say somethin’ stupid like that.” Rhett’s voice cracked.

“Dude, it was just a joke. You weren’t supposed to take it seriously,” Link shook his head.

“What if I am , though?” Rhett’s cheeks reddened. Was he actually about to say this?
“What if you’re what?” Link was confused. Or maybe he wasn’t, and needed the confirmation
from Rhett.

“Pining after you,” Rhett sighed.

“Are you?”

“Yeah, Link. I think so.”

Link didn’t answer, and for a long moment, Rhett worried he’d get up and leave. When Link
pinned Rhett to the bed, Rhett braced himself for a fight. He never saw the kiss coming.
 Getting Better
Chapter Summary

Yeah, I'm definitely going to hell for this one.

For the prompt "get out of the vent system," from archionblu. Rated E. Content
warning: Internalized homophobia.

Rhett wrapped his lips around Link’s cock, and damn if he didn’t look so fucking good like that.
Link was taking in every bit of the experience. It was a new agreement between them, a way to let
off steam, and they were enjoying exploring it together. Rhett’s new layer was trying to figure out
how to give the best possible blowjob, and he was improving fast.

He slid his tongue along the underside of Link’s cock, then stroked with his hand, letting the tip
rest on his tongue, his mouth wide open. Link’s breath was raspy. God it felt so good, he thought.

Rhett gripped Link’s ass tightly now, taking him in as deeply as he could. He dragged his lips
along Link’s cock, slowly caressing every inch before pulling Link forward to thrust deeper again.
His hand strayed, cupping Link’s balls, teasing him. Link responded with a long groan, and Rhett
knew he was doing something right.

For Rhett, it was like a fun game. He listened for Link’s sounds, felt the way his legs shook. He
watched for Link’s eyes to flutter closed a little bit, and waited to feel Link’s fingers tangle in his
hair. All of those were tell-tale signs that Link liked what Rhett was doing and Rhett memorized
those moments, honed his skills to make it better every single time.

Rhett loved the reaction he got from his hands exploring, covering new territory. Link’s eyes were
rolled back, his head leaned against the wall. Rhett stroked Link, thinking of something he hadn’t
yet tried. He pulled his mouth away just long enough to slick his finger up with saliva, and Link
was too lost in the moment to realize the momentary loss of Rhett’s tongue.

Rhett reached between Link’s legs, pressed a finger against him. The raspy groan, the “oh fuck,”
was all Rhett needed as an indication that this felt good, that he could take it further. He pressed a
bit more, his finger slipping in slightly, just to the first knuckle. Link relaxed, moaned Rhett’s
name, then he froze, realizing what was happening.

“Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa… get out of the vent system, man! What the fuck?”

Rhett reversed, slipped his finger out, leaned back to get a better look at Link’s face.

“Sorry,” Rhett muttered, looking away. Link flushed, his cheeks turning bright red. He swallowed.

“It’s uh… s’ok. You just… you surprised me. I thought… like… I thought this was just…. We’re
not making it weird, right?” Link tried to smirk, but just sighed instead.

“Yeah, sorry. I got carried away. Just forget it, man.” Rhett started to stand up, but Link put a firm
hand on his shoulder, one that kept him in place. He bit his lip like he wasn’t sure how to phrase
what he wanted to say in response to Rhett.
“I… uh…” Link stammered. “Is it gay if I liked it?”

Rhett smirked. Seriously? Link was getting a blowjob from a dude and he worried that this was
gay? Rhett shook his head, then looked at Link and waited for permission to start again.
 Crushed
Chapter Summary

For anon, who asked me to write a ficlet about a person describing their crush TO their
crush, but their crush doesn't realize they're talking about them.

"Come on, man, when's the last time you had a crush?" Link laughed out loud during the
discussion on Good Mythical More about outrageous things people did for their crushes. "You're
40 years old and married!" Link wasn't just implying it, he was flat-out saying it-- Rhett was too
old, too married, to have a crush apparently.

"Speak for yourself! I have a crush!" Rhett insisted, a smirk growing into a smile, his cheeks
peeking out above his beard as he let out his loud "Oh ho ho!" laugh.

"Okay, then. Tell me about your crush, buddyroll." Link knew Rhett was going to make a joke, to
ramble off a silly, unrealistic description of an unattainable celebrity. He secretly wished that Rhett
would have a crush on him, but he knew that would never happen.

"Well, alright," Rhett said, a serious look on his face now. He stroked his beard, trying to choose
the perfect descriptors. "My crush has dark hair, and I just find myself wanting to run my fingers
through it sometimes. Eyes that sparkle, could light up the whole room. Legs... gosh, the legs!
They're perfect. And," Rhett paused for effect, "A really great... behind." He snickered and took a
sip of water from his mug.

"Whoa, whoa, whoa, okay, Rhett, we get it..." Link interjected, but Rhett cut him off again.

"Sometimes, my crush wears this mustard sweater, and it looks amazing. And anytime my crush
walks into a room, you can just... gosh, it's amazing. Even just the smell... and funny-- I can't get
over the sense of humor my crush has. I can't help but laugh constantly. Everything about my crush
is... is perfect," he wrapped up quietly. Rhett started to blush, wondering if he went too far.

"Yeah, yeah, you're in love with Jessie," Link said dismissively, just wanting to end the
conversation. Link knew Rhett would have never used the opportunity to describe him, especially
not on their show, but hearing him talk up his wife so much hurt nonetheless. "You can't call her
your crush, though, man. She's your WIFE!"

Rhett felt a stab in his heart, a sharp pang of sadness that Link seemed to truly not get it. He wasn't
describing Jessie at all, instead having chosen the perfect description of Link. In the moment, he'd
even forgotten the sweater that Jessie had, the one that so closely resembled Link's own mustard
sweater. He knew the show wasn't the best place to correct Link, knew that he shouldn't open that
door, correct him at all, even when the show was over. But especially not now, not in front of their
kids, who watched, not in front of the Mythical Beasts or the world at large. Instead, he simply
forced a smile, and this time, his cheeks didn't join in, his face didn't light up the way it usually
did.

"Yeah, she's definitely something, though, isn't she?"

 Coming Out
Chapter Summary

For mythosethan, who requested a queer!Rhett headcanon.

This one ended up being more queer RandL than queer Rhett. I hope that's okay.

Rhett was shaking when he first came out to Link. He wasn't sure how Link would receive it, if
he'd be upset, or freaked out. He worried Link would make the logical leap of "you like men, so
you must... you must like me." While that was true, Rhett would never, ever do anything to make
Link feel uncomfortable, not intentionally. He wouldn't pursue Link if Link wasn't okay with it.
But still, just telling Link "hey, I'm queer" seemed a lot harder than it should be. They'd shared
everything. Childhoods, late night laughter, dorm rooms, career paths... they'd shared so much.
And still Rhett didn't know how to share this, the most intimate and personal detail he could think
of, the one thing he'd kept to himself forever. Of course, Link had to be the first person he'd tell,
even before his wife, his kids, his family. Link was his soul mate. He knew it, Link knew it,
everyone knew it including their wives. And when your soul has a mate, that's the person you have
to tell things to first, it seems like. So he did. He sat Link down and he told him. His hands shook,
his voice quivered, and he said it.

What surprised him was Link's answer.

"I know."

"You know?"

"I've always known."

Link was there when Rhett came out to Jessie. She asked if anything had happened between them,
if that's why he was bringing it up. Rhett honestly told her that no, nothing had happened between
them, and Link backed him up on that, reassured her that it was true. What surprised him this time
was Jessie's question.

"Do you want something to happen between you two?"

Rhett didn't want to answer. Not in front of Link. But when Link reached out and took Rhett's hand,
the one Jessie wasn't holding, he spoke where Rhett couldn't.

"I don't want anything to happen that you aren't okay with, Jessie. I'm not here to take him from
you, you know that."

Jessie did know.

Rhett was there when Link came out to Christy. She had tears in her eyes, and none of them were
surprised at the question she asked.

"Was I the last to know?" Link hadn't meant for it to be that way, hadn't meant for her to be out of
the loop. He confessed that he hadn't planned to come out, hadn't thought about it even, until Rhett
came out, and until Jessie posed her question.
It took a while for them to all get fully comfortable with the situation, for them to get used to the
new dynamic it presented. But none of them, really none of them, were surprised. After all, Link's
heart and soul belonged to Rhett, it had since September 4, 1984, and Rhett's heart and soul
belonged to Link. For over 30 years, that was the case. And really, they had more than enough love
to go around.
 The Phone Call
Chapter Summary

Inspired by this gif (nsfw):

https://78.media.tumblr.com/f21654d3fca7007b4f482e9a960edd7b/tumblr_oodmm2tdi41upg656o1_500.g
Rated E.

For clemwasjustagirl

Rhett can’t believe it’s happening. He’s trying hard to keep his focus on the words his mom is
saying, on some story she’s telling him about a letter that came in the mail for him, and it’s
probably more important than he’s getting right now. He’s straining to listen but Link’s hand is
grazing his cock, a playful look in his eyes and oh fuck he’s letting out a gasp.

“Everything okay, Rhett?”

He’s hearing his mom’s voice through the phone, and he’s shooting Link a look. Come on, man,
I’m on the freakin’ phone. It’s part begging Link to stop, part daring him to keep going, and Link
can tell.

“Yeah, mom, everything’s good. What were you saying?”

He’s trying hard to listen again but Link’s hand is more insistent, his palm pressing against Rhett
through his gym shorts, and Rhett can’t keep his focus on what his mom’s saying.

He catches the tail end of it before she’s asking about class, asking how things are going.

“They’re uh… oh… they’re great, yeah.” He’s stifling moans but it’s easier when he’s not talking.
When he’s not talking he can bite the inside of his cheek until it bleeds if it keeps him quiet. Link’s
sliding down his shorts and he’s still shooting Link looks, but he’s also lifting his hips to allow it,
shifting so Link can get them off. The shorts, that is, not Rhett, but probably also Rhett if they’re
not careful.

She’s asking about his favorite classes and for the life of him, he can’t remember a single class
he’s taking.

“Favorite classes? I uh, I really like…”

Link’s looking up at him, taking a break from kissing down Rhett’s stomach, his own abs, chest,
rocking against Rhett’s dick, and he’s whispering “mechanical engineering” or some shit,
“statistics, comp”

Rhett places his hand over his mouth for a second, takes a sharp inhale, bites the back of his hand
so his mom won’t hear.

“I really like statistics. It’s going well. Yeah, might…” fuck “might become a tutor for that one.”

She’s saying that sounds great, moving on to telling him some story about some woman at church
and the latest scandal there, that she might be getting divorced, and Rhett’s wondering how she’d
take the scandal that’s happening on this end of the phone, her son getting his cock sucked by his
best friend while she’s on the phone, listening to it, not realizing what she’s hearing.

“Mom, I gotta… I gotta go…” She can’t hear him, though, too busy in her own story. Link’s lips
are wrapped around his cock and he’s bobbing his head. Rhett’s fingers are tangled in Link’s hair
and Link isn’t showing any signs of stopping, slowing down. Rhett’s barely holding it together
now, feeling the graze of Link’s tongue as it swirls around the tip. He’s running his tongue along
the underside of Rhett’s cock and he’s hollowing his cheeks, he’s switching to give his hand the
chance to make Rhett come unglued as he lets his mouth explore, biting at Rhett’s thighs, sucking,
tongue exploring everything. Rhett’s pulling his hair now, yanking him back up to his cock, telling
him he’s close, he’s so fucking close, and if Link isn’t careful, he’s going to make him come right
there while his mom is listening.

She’s still talking, catching him up on everything back home. He’s saying “yeah? Oh really?” into
the phone and trying to make sure she knows he’s listening, but he’s not. He doesn’t have a damn
clue what she’s saying. And he’s trying, trying so hard to get off the phone before he shoots his
load down Link’s throat but she’s not listening, either, too focused on what she wants to say. Rhett
places the phone down on the table beside him– she’s too lost in her story to notice– and he’s
pressing his pillow to his face with both hands, a choking, sobbing moan coming out of his mouth
and into the fabric and Link’s swallowing every last drop. He’s trying to get his composure back as
Link sits up, wiping his mouth with the back of his hand, shit-eating grin on his face.

Rhett’s pulling the phone back to his ear to the sounds of “Rhett, honey, you still there? Rhett?”

“Mom, I gotta go,” Rhett’s saying into the phone. “Love you, I’ll call you tomorrow.” No more
than a second after he hangs up, he’s flipping Link over, pinning his arms to the bed.

“What the fuck was that?” Rhett’s growling, all hot breath and teeth on Link’s ear. Link’s going to
pay for what he’s done, and he’s going to love every fucking second of it.
 Ravenous
Chapter Summary

Rhett's starving, so he's searching the party for something... some one delicious. His
eyes lock with blue eyes across the room, and he's sure he's found the snack he's
looking for.

Chapter Notes

Anon asked: one word prompt - ravenous

Rhett’s starving. He’s always hungry, but that’s how it is when you’re new, you know? His
stomach growls and he’s rubbing his hands over it, ravenous for something... it’s hard for him not
to scan the room, wondering which one of these people would be missed the least. He’s looking for
an easy victim, someone who will trust him, someone who will go easily.

Tentative steps forward through the room are killing him because the smell is so strong,
overwhelming and overpowering. He’s feeling a little dizzy and weak from how much he wants it,
and he’s licking his lips. He sees a blonde flip her hair over her shoulder and she smells so sweet,
but then perfume overtakes her natural smell and he feels nauseated. He’s going to have to work
quickly. His energy is low and he can feel himself getting agitated over the smallest things.

Blue eyes lock with his and for a moment, he panics. So far, no one had really even taken note of
him, but this man, standing in a corner alone, is staring straight at him. There is no element of
surprise there. He steps to one side, as though he’s going for a drink, and the eyes follow him. He
wonders if he’s gotten tangled up in something, if there’s about to be a battle he’s unprepared for.
He’s heard of them, hunters, but he’s never encountered one. It seems too clear this blue-eyed man
is onto his game.

No use running, he figures, and he decides to take a step toward the man instead. The man steps
toward him, too, and they meet in the middle of the room. “I-I, uh... I know this sounds cheesy but
I’ve been watching you all night. Are you here alone?” The blue-eyed guy blinks at him, looking
into his eyes, and Rhett bites his lower lip. He can’t tell if this is an interrogation, if the man is
about to catch him off-guard, but there’s something genuine there.

“I am,” Rhett answers. “And you?”

“Yeah,” he mumbles. “I, um... I had a date, or... or... I was supposed to.” There’s a sadness in his
eyes and Rhett wonders what his story is. “Do you, um... do you want to dance?”

Dancing wasn’t what Rhett had in mind. The only reason he was here was for a quick meal, one in
a crowded room where anyone could be a suspect if a guest mysteriously disappeared. If Rhett
danced with the man, there was a chance someone would see it, would remember the tall man in
black who danced with the guy who went missing. His stomach growls again. Against his better
judgment, he nods, placing his hand on the man’s waist.
“I’m Link,” the blue-eyed man says to him, and Rhett nods.

“I like that name.” He doesn’t offer his own, and thankfully, the man doesn’t ask.

“Your hands are cold,” Link mumbles, and Rhett can read the insecurity written all over his face.

“Sorry,” Rhett smiles sincerely. “Can’t help it. I’m a little, uh, cold-blooded.” It’s not a lie but it’s
easy enough for the man to take it as a joke, and he does. Rhett can see the chuckle, but more, he
can see the throbbing of the veins in his neck. He’s so hungry. Rhett’s dying to flick his tongue
across the skin there, to sink his teeth in.

Link leans in and rests his head against Rhett, and for a moment, Rhett’s worried that he’ll notice
what’s missing, the lack of warmth, the lack of a heartbeat, but Link says nothing about it, instead
lifting his head. “You smell nice.”

“Thanks,” Rhett says, and he takes a deep inhale. “You smell delicious.”

The man gets a small smirk on his face like he’s not entirely sure how to take that, but Rhett’s
unfocused and overwhelmed by it. His legs are slowly getting weaker and he can feel himself
drooping. If he doesn’t eat soon, things are going to get bad, quickly.

“Do you, um... could we go outside and talk? It’s a little crowded in here,” Rhett says, and Link
nods, following him outside. He’s even prettier in the moonlight, the way the light reflects off of
his tanned skin and sparkling eyes, the way his dark hair blends into the night.

“You wanted to talk to me?” Link asks, and Rhett nods again. He’s caught off-guard by how
innocent Link seems to everything that’s happening. “I’d like that. But first, um, forgive me if this
is a little bit forward,” Link says. Rhett can tell he’s shy, which is why he’s perplexed and
overwhelmed by what Link does next. He lifts on his toes, leaning close to Rhett, and kisses him.
Rhett can feel the pulse of his heartbeat even in his lips, the warmth of his humanity. The taste is
overwhelming. Rhett knows he could keep going with this... he’s done it before, started to kiss
someone, kiss down their neck, and then bite, dig in, feed his ravenous body and soul.

But for some reason, he likes how Link kisses, how he tastes and how he feels, the way he smells
and the little breaths he takes tickling Rhett’s cheek. For some reason, Rhett would rather starve
than dig in, no matter how hungry he is. He shudders, his stomach growling, and Link pulls back.

“You’re hungry? Do you, um... you want to ditch this place and go get tacos?”

Link’s endearing, his smile wide, and Rhett knows he can’t bite him. He’ll find a way to slip away
from Link later, a way to get the blood he desperately needs, but first, he’s getting tacos.
 Tooth Fairy
Chapter Notes

Rhett's parents never put an effort into the tooth fairy when he was a kid. One day,
Link decides to make it right.

He was too far gone, too deep into his rest, too exhausted from late nights he'd been working lately.
He had too much going on. Therapy, work, spending free time with Link, trying to be a good
husband and father, making time for his other friends... it was all piling on him.

That's why it was perfect timing. That's why Rhett would never know, would never feel the pillow
lift slightly. It was so subtle that Link worried he might not even notice it, but as he dumped the
pile of glitter across the floor, knowing he'd be kicking himself on the cleanup later, he knew it
would be enough of a clue.

He scurried back down from the nap loft, tucking everything away and getting back to work.
Eventually, Rhett would wake up and find it, but that was for later. For now, he had to be quiet, to
work and let Rhett sleep.

Rhett did sleep, for at least thirty minutes more, which gave Link some comfort that there wasn't
any sort of close call. The first thing Rhett did, coming down from the loft, wasn't to confront Link
about it. For a moment, Link wondered if he'd possibly missed it altogether, despite the glitter, but
as he leaned back in his chair and put his hands behind his head, asking "Good nap, bo?" Rhett
only gave a soft hum as he got his reading glasses from his desk and peered at the tiny note.

Link didn't have to ask him about it to know what it said. He'd typed it himself in the most
whimsical font he could find. "Sorry things got mixed up the first time. Hope this makes it right. -
Your New Tooth Fairy"

"What?" Rhett turned, looking at Link.

"I asked if you had a good nap."

"Oh. Yeah. Did you leave this under my pillow?"

Link tried to stifle the smile that would be a dead giveaway. Instead he turned back to his desk to
make sure Rhett couldn't see the smile forming on his face. "No. What is it?"

Rhett walked closer and put the small note on his desk and a sparkly $5 bill.

"You been to the strip clubs, man? That's one glittery bill," Link said, trying to deflect. Maybe he
could somehow convince Rhett it had been someone else, Stevie or something.

"So you didn't have anything to do with the tooth fairy mysteriously showing up in our nap loft?"

Link tried his hardest to set his mouth in a straight line and keep it there. "Hmm, no. I've just been
working all afternoon buddy. Maybe you need another nap. You're talkin' crazy stuff."

"Oh. Okay." Rhett almost sounded disappointed, like he wanted it to be Link all along. But if it
wasn't, it wasn't.

Link turned around to study Rhett's face, to look over the mix of emotions there. Instead, Rhett
reached out, pressing his finger to a spot of glitter on Link's cheek. "Caught ya, tooth fairy," he said
quietly. "Your glitter gave you away."

This time, Link's smile was a dead giveaway, making it obvious that he'd done it. "I don't know
what you're talking about," he said.

"Mmm, mhmm, no tooth fairies in this office except me, right?" Rhett asked, thinking back to their
sleep tight music video. Link nodded and smiled as Rhett mussed his hair. "Thanks, buddyroll."
 Fear
Chapter Summary

(Rated Explicit). Rhett takes Link to a haunted house and protects him from the fears
he faces.
AU where RandL are roommates.

Link is clinging to Rhett’s arm so hard there will probably be a bruise tomorrow, and Rhett would
protest, but it also means Link’s body is pressed to his back, Link’s eyes barely peering over his
hunched shoulder trying to see but also low enough that he can duck behind Rhett if he needs to.
Rhett grew up on scary movies, and he’s brave, certain that no jumpscare in the haunted house can
get to him, but as they turn the corner in a hall of mirrors, as someone jumps out and they can’t tell
where he’s at because it feels like he’s everywhere , Rhett turns and wraps himself around Link to
cover him, keep him safe. Link clings to him like his life depends on it, and given the way he
views haunted houses, he probably thinks it does.

Rhett’s got him, though, long arms wrapped around Link as he struggles through, trying both to
find the way out and keep Link safe from anything jumping out. Every way he turns is more
mirrors, and finding the exit is proving more difficult than anticipated when he’s holding Link the
way he is, trying to walk backward to keep Link away from anything lurking. When Link screams,
Rhett’s heart races, and Link buries his face into Rhett’s neck in a way that makes his heart feel
like it might pound right out of his chest, no longer from the panic of Link being scared, but now
from the closeness, the fact that he can smell Link’s hair and feel his breath on his skin. “I’ve got
you, bo,” he says, noticing a person retreating back into the darkness that had snuck up on them
from behind. Rhett runs his fingers through Link’s hair, brushing his fingertips against the nape of
his neck, and for a moment, Link relaxes into him. It’s enough that Rhett can calm him down to
navigate through the rest of the mirrors.

He knows they have to be almost out of here, knows that there isn’t much longer given how long
they’ve been inside. If Link gets any closer to Rhett, he’ll be on top of him, and for a moment,
Rhett feels half-tempted to pick him up and carry him out, but he knows his back isn’t up for the
job at all. Instead, he continues to hold Link until he can’t anymore, until the passage is so narrow
that he has to turn around and slide through sideways, holding Link’s hand and letting Link grip
his arm with the other hand as they work their way through.

Rhett can hear the sound of a chainsaw and it’s nerve-wracking, sending chills up his spine. It
sounds so real, so close, and it’s like they can smell Link’s fear as they get closer. The more that
Rhett tries to hide him, the more they seek Link out and try to spook him. He’s dragging him
through now, with Link paralyzed with fear, as the chainsaw sounds get closer and the masked man
holding it comes into view. There’s only one way out now, down a slide, and Rhett knows it. He
nudges Link in front of him even though he’s not completely sure what awaits them at the other
end. It’s the safest way, the only one that allows Link safety from the man with the chainsaw
chasing behind him. Rhett wraps his legs around Link’s waist, making sure they stay locked
together, and as he pushes them off from the top of the slide, he curls his whole body around
Link’s, burying his face in Link’s neck not for safety, but for closeness. He loves how close they
are right now, loves the way Link leans back into him, and even though the slide is several stories
tall, he’s sad when it’s over because they have to pry themselves apart. Of course, uncurling
themselves only leaves them exposed to one last scare, one last monster chasing them out of the
haunted house and Link’s holding Rhett’s arm again so tightly it’s going numb.

When they get outside, Link’s pupils are blown, adrenaline coursing through his veins, and despite
the scare, he has a wide smile on his face that says it was okay, that he’s okay and that he liked the
sensations of being terrified even if it’ll haunt him in his dreams later.

Rhett’s on an adrenaline high, too, less from the scaring and more from being so close to Link. He
doesn’t want it over, doesn’t want their night to end, and he’s half-tempted to drag Link through
another house just to get more time that close to him, but then Link does what Rhett’s not
expecting, scaring him in a way that’s drastically different from any of the horrors they just saw
inside of the house. He’s leaning into Rhett, not just hugging him but kissing him, at first planting
an awkward kiss on his lips but then working his tongue into Rhett’s mouth and Rhett is melting,
melting, melting into it and breathing in Link every way he can. He’s terrified, scared of what this
might mean for them, worried about Link’s decision-making skills right after he’s been scared but
he can’t stop himself from giving in and letting Link kiss him, kissing back, feeling Link’s fingers
find their way up his back and around the back of his neck, playing with his hair and feeling the
scratch of Rhett’s beard on his face and it feels eternal and too short at the same time.

Link backs off and smiles, and Rhett can’t help but go back in for another kiss, which Link gladly
accepts, not just accepts but meets him in, move for move, moment for moment, until Rhett’s
pulling back this time. “Thanks for protecting me, bo,” he says softly. There’s no need to talk
loudly, no need to make this anything bigger than it is, but Rhett is desperate for more.

“You want to go home?” he asks, and Link nods. In the car, Link still hasn’t released his hand and
it’s no longer to keep himself safe. It’s to keep Rhett close, to keep him there, to have more of this.
Neither of them really talk, and Rhett’s driving them back to their shared apartment. They’ve only
ever been roommates, never anything more, and he’s not really sure where the kiss came from. It’s
too much, too much and somehow not enough and once they’re inside the apartment, Rhett’s
giving Link a small nod and starting to say that he’s going to go to bed, but Link’s pulling him back
in for another kiss, letting Rhett press him against their closed apartment door.

“I want you,” Link’s pleading against Rhett’s lips and it’s impossible for Rhett to say no to that
because he wants this, too, wants Link, wants everything with him. It’s shameful thoughts he’d
kept to himself as he jacked off in their college dorm and now in their apartment come to life,
things he’d tried to stuff down every time his hand was on his cock and his mind was on Link’s
body, but now he’s not stuffing it down. He’s embracing it, and this time he is picking Link up,
carrying him toward his bedroom and dropping Link on the bed no matter how his back protests,
watching Link lean back as Rhett crowds against him, kissing his neck and rucking his shirt up and
off over his head and onto the floor. He’s teasing a tongue over Link’s nipple and kissing his way
down Link’s body and Link is writhing.

“You sure you want this?” Rhett finds himself asking and he’s kicking himself because of course if
Link changes his mind, he’ll stop, but he doesn’t want to stop.

“Yes,” Link says, and relief washes over Rhett. “I’ve wanted this for so long.” That’s the answer
Rhett wants, that this isn’t a tonight thing, an adrenaline thing, a heat-of-the-moment need that
Link will eventually regret, but a long-time, deep-seated love that has been mutual for far longer
than either of them want to admit. Rhett tugs at Link’s joggers and pulls them down, and Link’s
already so hard, so ready and willing and needy and desperate and Rhett’s wrapping his lips around
Link and dragging his tongue along the length. They won’t get as far as going all the way tonight,
it’s obvious, but they’ll start along that path, working their mouths along each other’s skin,
begging but reverent, understanding that this was always meant to be more and all it took was
fearing for their lives, however silly that might have been, to knock them over that ledge, to open
the barriers that had held their hearts apart for far too long.

Today, Rhett’s going to have his mouth on Link, coax him to finish, fingers tangled in Rhett’s hair
and Rhett’s name on his lips and tomorrow it’ll be “stay in my room” and the next day it’ll be “just
move your clothes in here, we’ll turn your room into an office” because there’s no going back now
that they’re here. There’s no turning around this train that’s on a collision course with the rest of
their lives.

One Halloween shouldn’t shift the balance but it does. It does so fast that they’re both wondering
how it happened, what led them here, but neither of them can forget the fact that it’s been fear all
along stopping them, the fear of what everyone would think and the fear of if this was okay, and
the fear of if they’d ruin their friendship by taking this elsewhere. The only thing stronger than that
fear is the other fear, fear of the things jumping out at them pushing them physically closer, but the
fear of “what if we don’t?” that sends them to the point where they can’t be broken apart.

So Link comes and Rhett holds him, they strip the rest of the way and their bodies are close, warm,
connected, and that’s how they fall asleep. It’s just a haunted house, it’s just a friendship, but then
it’s not. And next year when they weave their way back through that same haunted house, long
forgetting the individual jump scares that brought them to this point, they’ll be thankful for it
anyway, thankful for the shift it caused in their relationship. And when, just outside of that haunted
house, Rhett gets down on one knee and asks Link to be his forever, for the rest of his life, it isn’t
fear, but love, that leads Link to say yes.
 Pollinate
Chapter Summary

At the Streamys, Rhett wore bees and Link wore flowers. After the Streamys, it finally
time to pollinate. For fanbabble, who needed more.

Link’s trying his hardest to hang the suit jackets up on the cheap hotel hanger but Rhett’s swatting
at his hands and letting them fall to the floor. It doesn’t matter that they were expensive, custom.
He’s kissing Link’s neck, reaching around the front of him to unbutton Link’s shirt. “Leave it,” he
says. “We’ll get them pressed tomorrow. Come on. We have so much to celebrate.”

“Celebrate? We didn’t win an award,” Link’s muttering, but he’s leaning back against Rhett’s chest
anyway, letting Rhett’s fingers trail through his chest hair as he frees Link from the buttons and
Link shrugs off his shirt. He turns around and kisses Rhett, focusing his own fingers on Rhett’s top
buttons while Rhett focuses on the lower ones. He doesn’t want to wait for Link’s shaky hands to
strip him. He wants this now. They’ve waited so long, forever it feels like, since they were young
and he had yearnings, longings, desperate moments that he squashed down inside.

Now it’s different. Now they’ve got time and they’ve got the hotel room to themselves and more
than anything they’ve got permission .

Link knows how much the award means to Rhett, how much he craves the validation of the trophy
in his hands, so he’s surprised when Rhett seems to not care at all. “I don’t care about the award,”
Rhett says. “I’ve got the best damn trophy right here.” He’s unbuttoning his own pants and Link’s
looking down at his crotch.

“Wow, cocky much? I’ve stolen enough sideway glances to say it’s nice but a trophy?” Link
chuckles, following Rhett’s suit and unbuttoning his own pants.

“I meant you,” Rhett muttered, stepping forward and forgetting the pants for a moment to kiss Link
again. The kisses had been new, but they were falling into the rhythm anyway, falling into them
becoming almost normal. They didn’t have to stop and think about who was turning their head
which way (because everything for them felt like a mirror at times and it took a few tries) or pause
to stop fighting for control over the moment anymore. It just happened and Link could feel Rhett’s
scratchy beard on his chin and it felt good.

“Oh, so now I’m just a trophy instead of, you know, your better half in this whole arrangement?”
Link argued with him, but the smile was on his lips. It wasn’t a real fight, not tonight, not when
they had this.

“Don’t do the whole old married thing tonight, baby. Just let me have this.” It was Rhett’s way of
refusing to give up control, but Link decided not to argue. He’d get the control where it mattered,
pushing Rhett back on the bed and straddling his hips.

“I won’t but you’re going to let me, uh, pollinate you…” Link said. They’d already discussed it, of
course, already decided that Rhett would get to this first time. That’s why he’d worn the suit he
did, almost rubbing it in Link’s face how their little competition had gone. Link pinned Rhett’s
arms but it didn’t take long for him to release Rhett, let Rhett flip them over, get his mouth on
Link’s bare skin in all the places his shirt was open.

“Come on, let’s get this off of you, bo,” he said, trying to wiggle Link out of the shirt, discarding
his own on the floor. They were practically bare now, getting harder and threatening to escape their
underwear as they created whatever friction they could against each other, rough kisses and coarse
body hair and desperation of them waiting so damn long. “I can’t wait,” Rhett finally said, tugging
Link’s underwear off of him. He wanted desperately to get his mouth on Link’s cock, to wrap his
lips around it and get Link whimpering in pleasure. But he’d heard enough from Link about, well,
struggling not to finish too soon throughout the years when they’d swap stories or advice, and he
wasn’t about to let this night take a premature end. Instead, he folded Link over, seeking out his
sensitive spaces and running his tongue along the skin there,spreading Link and working his
tongue inside, breathing cool air on him as his beard scratched at Link’s cheeks with flattened
swipes of his tongue, alternated with gentle prodding until Link was opening for him.

It was Link’s needy moans and breathy gasps that said they were going to have to work quickly, at
least for round one. Rhett scrambled out of his own underwear, then tried to search the bed for the
bottle of lube he’d brought, preparing for this moment that was finally here. He drizzled it on and
flipped the cap closed, sliding a finger into Link, then a second when he realized Link had been
clearly preparing for this, just as desperate and interested as he’d been for so long. “Come on,
Rhett, I need it, stop screwin’ around…”

That was all Rhett needed to hear, and even though he entered slowly, Link’s leg hooked around
him to try to pull deeper. Link couldn’t stand not having the control, and because of it, Rhett
fought against him a little bit, holding himself back just enough and going at his own pace,
savoring every second of this. “Yeah, that’s right, baby,” Rhett said as he draped himself over
Link, pushing in fully and listening to Link groan at the surprising girth filling him, “I’m going to
pollinate you so hard tonight.”

Link had trouble not bursting into laughter, and Rhett’s “oh-ho-ho” laughter filled the air as he
pushed in again, hitting Link at just the right spot, a strangled “oh, gosh, shiiiiooott….” stopping
him from laughing anymore because now it was on. Link was around him, the smell of their bodies
against each other, sweat-slicked and needy filling the air, the feeling of Link’s limbs holding him
close and the way that Link sounded against his ear when his face was buried in Link’s neck drove
him deeper, further, harder into him until he was falling over the edge. The friction of their bodies
and the way he pounded against Link’s prostate made Link finish first, just like they’d both figured
might happen. It didn’t take long for Rhett to come, too, groaning like an animal against Link’s
collarbones, tears in his eyes from how perfect Link looked and how good this felt and how long
they’d waited. The emotions were a lot, something he didn’t expect. It was the connection of being
with the person who had his soul, sending him over, over, over, into Link.

Catching their breath seemed like the easy part compared to coming down from the high of
something that had been such a long time coming, but the moment Link could breathe again, before
he’d barely recovered, while they were both still too overstimulated to even attempt a second
round, he was wrapping his hand around Rhett. “Nice stinger. Next time you can try mine out.”
 Peanut Butter
Chapter Summary

Rated Explicit. Link hasn't quite gotten used to giving head, but Rhett's sure a little
assistance from Link's favorite food, peanut butter, will do the trick. For mythicalea
and thepatientheart, who needed some peanut butter love.

Link couldn’t handle cock. In theory, it was great, the thought of Rhett hard and peeking out of his
underwear, like a lollipop just waiting for Link to get his mouth on it. But in practice? Well, it
could be a little gag-inducing. Rhett had learned this, figured it out after a little bit of trial and error.
A lot depended on depth or on pacing, but for some reason, even just the girth of it in Link’s mouth
seemed to get in his head more than anything, psyching him out before a good finish for either of
them.

It was with that in mind, helping Link get through it, that Rhett peeled back the seal on the brand-
new jar of Skippy. He wouldn’t dare defile his family’s jar of peanut butter in this manner, but he’d
absolutely do it to a new jar if it made Link happy, helped him take what they both knew he
wanted.

“Getting started without me?” Link huffed, looking over Rhett’s shoulder as he saw Rhett pick up
the peanut butter jar and head toward the loft.

“I just didn’t think you’d be interested in this part of it,” Rhett said.

“I’m… I’m actually really interested in it.” There was something about the thought of his best
friend, his lover, penetrating a jar of peanut butter that spoke to Link in the depths of his soul. His
two great loves in the world, really. Peanut butter. Rhett. It just made sense. “I can hold the jar if
you want.”

There was nothing like a fresh jar of peanut butter, the way the surface was smooth and glassy, a
small little swirl on the top from the machine it came from… Link’s hands were shaky enough
without the proximity of Rhett’s hardened state. With it, he was having trouble steadying himself.
He was too interested, too desperate, too ready to watch Rhett penetrate the smooth top layer of
peanut butter. “Mmm, yeah, that’s… go slow, bo,” he urged, and held the jar up to Rhett’s level as
Rhett eased in slowly.

“That feels so weird.”

“Does it feel good? Tell me about it,” Link insisted. He was practically drooling, it seemed,
focused on the way Rhett slid into it and the way the peanut butter pooled up around the sides.
“That’s… wow…”

“It’s just sort of slimy? Maybe a little oily? Not real sticky or anything. Smooth. It’s, uh… it’s
nice,” he said. He was trying to tell Link about it but his brain was focused on what he was doing
and the lustful look in Link’s eyes as he thrust forward a few times, pulling out to see the coat of
peanut butter on him, the sheen of the nutty color on his cock.

“Gosh, yeah, that’s… wow, that looks so good.” Link’s mouth was practically watering, the way
he was staring and licking his lips. His heart was beating hard and even Rhett could sense the way
he was now breathing heavy. The smell alone did things to Link and watching Rhett fuck the jar
had him hard and overwhelmed in ways he never thought possible. “I need it.”

He slid the jar off of Rhett, twisting as he did, resulting in a thick swirl at the tip. He was on his
knees, ready to take Rhett in his mouth, but first he licked at the peanut butter, lapping the little
peak it had formed until his tongue was making contact with Rhett. “Oh my gosh,” he said, and
Rhett was itching for more contact. He held himself still, though, resisting the urge to push into
Link’s mouth until Link was ready.

Instead of taking Rhett in at first, he lapped little kitten-like licks at the tip and around the sides,
flicking his tongue until he met skin instead of peanut butter. But soon that wasn’t enough. Link
was desperate for more, both of the peanut butter and of Rhett. He wrapped his lips around him
tightly, peanut butter pooling at the sides of his lips and getting on much of his face. It didn’t
matter. He was choking on Rhett now, unable to get him all the way in for the amount of peanut
butter coating him. It didn’t matter. He was desperate and needy, grasping Rhett’s ass tightly and
pulling him deeper.

“Slow down, bo,” Rhett encouraged, tugging at Link’s hair to help him ease off. If Link wasn’t
careful, Rhett would come way too fast, and this felt too good for that. The peanut butter was
getting softer, melting and mixing with Link’s saliva until it was dripping down and onto the floor.
The room smelled like peanut butter, but that only got Link more turned on. What was already a
near-dangerous level of obsession with his favorite food was turning into a powerful association
with Rhett’s dick and that was something that wouldn’t easily be untangled. He was straining
against his underwear and sat up on his knees to slide them down without taking his mouth off of
Rhett, using one hand to assist him in holding Rhett while the other freed his own cock.

His hands were just as coated in peanut butter as his face now, and Rhett watched as he wrapped
one messy hand around himself, stroking as he gagged on Rhett, eyes watering with the efforts. It
felt too good, tasted too good, everything was intense and nutty, and Rhett was losing his control
and his grasp on the situation. Link’s face was lust-stricken and lost in pleasure, and that alone was
enough to send Rhett squeezing a nut butter of his own making down Link’s throat.

Link pulled off of him to say “fuck, you taste so good right now,” but then got his mouth right back
on Rhett, sucking until he was overstimulated and overwhelmed and was physically pulling Link
off of him even though Link hadn’t cleaned off all of the peanut butter like he wanted to. Any more
would have been too much for Rhett, and now he wanted to sit back, watch Link enjoy himself and
this moment. Rhett slumped onto the recliner across from Link, thankful they’d chosen leather,
which would make for an easier cleanup later. He knew Link would appreciate it, even if Link
wasn’t thinking right now, too into this moment.

Link licked the peanut butter off of his fingers one by one, continuing to stroke his nut butter-
slicked cock with his free hand until he was arching his back and groaning. “Yeah, Link, come for
me, baby,” Rhett encouraged. “You look so good like that, that’s so sexy, come on, you’re doing
so good.” It was just what Link needed to finish, spurting across the floor, licking his come and the
rest of the peanut butter from his fingers.

It took a few minutes for the haze of pleasure to wear off, and when it did, he found himself coated
in peanut butter from his lips to his cock, with it streaked down his chest and on his lips. “How was
that?” Rhett asked quietly.

“Good. But I think now I’m glad we have a shower in the office,” Link chuckled. Before the
shower, though, Rhett pulled him in for a kiss. Peanut butter had never tasted so sweet.
 En Fuego
Chapter Summary

Rhett and Link are gearing up for a Halloween party in college. They've planned to go
as Sexy Firefighters, but there's a small kink in the plan. Rated T.

"I thought we said we were going as firefighters, man, what the heck?!" Link's eyes scanned up
and down Rhett's body, then he glanced down at his own, the shirtless body, the baggy pants, the
suspenders... something didn't line up.

"Well, they were out of men's costumes, so..."

"So... you improvised? You can't go out like that, man! Come on, let's... here..." Link started
digging through the closet. They were going to have to come up with something else. His best
friend couldn't go to the party like... like that. He scanned his eyes up and down Rhett's body
again, taking in the fishnet stockings that Rhett had to cut the toes out of to stretch over his long
form, the high heels that made him even taller, the puffy red skirt that sat low on his hips, showing
off the tuft of hair on his lower stomach. He was a firefighter, alright. A sexy, sexy firefighter like
they'd discussed, planning to go as hot calendar-style firefighters to pick up some chicks at the
party.

But Rhett wasn't the kind of sexy firefighter Link had in mind. He'd thought they'd go as a pair of
rugged men. Rhett was gorgeous down to the flame-red lipstick on his lips.

"Here. A lab coat from our old science labs. You be a doctor, I'll be the firefighter, it'll be great."

"I don't want to be a doctor. I want to be a sexy firefighter!" Rhett answered, flouncing his short
skirt and pulling it up a little too high, making the bulge in his tight black short shorts very apparent
to Link.

"But... people will, uh, they'll see you dressed like, uh, like..." Link stammered. He couldn't form
thoughts with Rhett looking like that, looking so stunningly feminine and so gorgeous that it made
Link blush a little bit. "You just can't go like that!" Link said, his voice going up in pitch out of
frustration and... desire?

"So people will see. Big frickin' deal, Link. It's Halloween! We can go as anything we want!" Rhett
insisted. Then he stared Link down and took a step forward. "What's the other option? We're both
dressed for the party. I'm not changing. I'm either going, or I'm staying here."

Link didn't back down, just swallowing heavily as he considered what Rhett was saying. "You
want to stay here?"

"I was kind of hoping people would see my outfit, honestly. But I could be convinced to stay home
if you really think they'll hate it."

Link swallowed again, nervous and sweaty. It seemed like Rhett was almost offering something.
"What exactly do you want me to say, McLaughlin?"

"What do you want to say, Link?" Rhett asked. His eyes didn't leave Link's, and there wasn't an
ounce of self-consciousness from Rhett right then. It was like he knew, like he'd been planning it
ever since he found the costume.

"Okay. Let's make one sweep of the party and say hi to everyone. But with you dressed like that, I
don't want you going home with anyone but me."

"Deal."
 Afternoon Wood
Chapter Summary

When Rhett starts moaning during an afternoon nap, Link takes notice and can't help
himself...
Rated Explicit. For Fanbabble

Rhett's sleeping when Link first feels the urge. He can hear Rhett across the room, the sound of his
breath, the soft whimper like he's thinking about something in his sleep. It only takes a small
glance over to see that he's hard, blanket tented from whatever he's thinking about in his sleep, and
Link can't get it out of his head.

He rolls to his side, trying to look away from Rhett's sleeping body, but it doesn't help. The image
is already seared into his brain, into his closed eyes, and the fact that Rhett is right there, so close,
hard as a rock... it's too much for him.

He's getting hard, too, and he knows it. He can't ever let Rhett know how he's feeling, what he's
thinking, the fact that he's been wanting him for-fucking-ever. It's ridiculous how much he's been
lusting after him, staring at him every time he changes, every time the water is dripping off of him
after a trip to the river, every time he's got his shirt off to play video games.

Link knows it isn't mutual, knows it can't be. He barely wears a shirt as it is, and Rhett seems to do
just fine at not looking at him. It's unfortunate, really. It felt like they were made to be together, but
somehow, it's all one-sided. But none of that matters right this second, heat of the moment, lusting
after his best friend in the middle of the afternoon during what's supposed to be a quick study
break.

"Come on, Link, stop," he thinks to himself, trying to will his hard-on down, to try to get it to stop,
soften, go away. But then Rhett moans again.

"Fuck, yeah... that's really good," he says in his sleep. Link can't resist for another second. He's
quiet when he does it, reaching into his pants and wrapping his hand around himself, stroking
himself quietly and trying to do it slowly enough that the bed won't creak and give him away.
"Yeah, just like that," Rhett groans again and Link is harder, dripping, desperate for it.

He's not quiet anymore, too hard to try, and his bed starts to creak a few times. His eyes are closed
and he's biting his lip, listening to the sounds and mutterings Rhett's got going on. By the time he's
getting closer to the edge, he doesn't even realize he can't hear the sound of Rhett sleeping
anymore. "You getting off?"

Link doesn't slow down, certain it's still sleep talk.

"Link!" Rhett urges, tossing a pillow across the room and hitting Link dead in the face. Link
freezes, terrified. He's been caught in the act. It's not too big a deal, not like they don't know each
other does this from time to time, but Link still can't help but feel guilty that he was thinking about
Rhett, wishing Rhett was talking about him in his sleep.

"Sorry." Link rolls over, yanks the covers over his head.
"No, it's good. I'm just askin' is all."

"Yeah, I was," Link said, sighing.

"Show me?" Rhett's staring him down now.

"Show you what?"

"Show me what you're doin'." He looks at Link long and hard, focusing on him. "You don't have to.
I'm just curious."

"I'm just jacking off. What's there to show you?" Link asks, snapping at Rhett a little too hard
given he was praying Rhett would want to see anyway. He's torn between embarrassment over
what he's doing and desperation to do what Rhett wants, to show him, to let Rhett see what he does
to him, even if he doesn't know it's him doing it.

Link moves the covers, giving Rhett a good, solid glimpse of his length, glistening in afternoon
sunlight that peeks through partially broken blinds. "Fuck," Rhett says, gives a low whistle through
his teeth. Link can see the movement of his hand downward, the way he's got it on himself now.

"Show me," Link says, and it's less a question than a command, more of a request because he
already showed Rhett.

"Okay," Rhett says, flicking the covers off of himself and exposing himself fully to Link. He keeps
eye contact as his hand moves, watching Link. "Come here."

"What?"

"Come here," Rhett says. "I won't touch you or anything, don't worry." Link's eyes flick down to
his cock, then back up to Rhett as he licks his lips. "Unless you want me to..."

That spurs Link into motion, across the room and onto Rhett's bed. For a long while, they're just
jerking it next to each other, watching each other's hands move, trying to match pace and not talk
about what this is. But Link can't stop himself from saying something. "What are we doin'?" he
asks.

"I don't know," Rhett tells him honestly. "I like it."

"Me, too," Link says softly.

"Can I, uh--" Rhett says, reaching over toward Link. Link lets go of himself, nods, bites his lip.
Rhett does, taking Link in his hand and continuing, working them, one dick in each hand, himself
and Link, same pace, same movement.

"Here, hold on," Link says, stopping him for a second. "You um, you want me to suck yours
maybe?" It's a bold thing, taking this from what it was to what he's asking for, but he wants it.

"God, yeah, that'd... that'd be real nice, Link." It doesn't take a second for Link to move, to get
down there and wrap his lips around it, letting Rhett grab his hair and pull him deeper. "Oh, yeah,
like that... that's so good, Link, you're so good. Better than I was dreamin', I swear... how can you
be this good in real life?"

"What?" Link freezes, realizes that maybe his wishes about what Rhett was dreaming about were
reality, but Rhett shakes his head.
"Forget it."

"No," Link says. "Tell me. Were you... were you dreaming about, um. About this?"

"Yeah," Rhett says, looking away. "I mean, I'm not tryin' to make things weird, but sometimes I
just... I think about us and this, and... I don't know, maybe we're just too close or something."

"Maybe," Link says. He doesn't keep going. Not yet. "Maybe you should fuck me, bo."

"Really?"

"Yeah," Link tells him. "You want it. I want it. If we've both been wanting it, what does it matter
why? Why not just do it?"

"Okay," Rhett says, and Link's scrambling off of him, grabbing lotion from the dresser drawer and
tossing it to Rhett, bending over his bed and looking at Rhett.

"Come on, Rhett, do it before I change my mind." They both know he won't change his mind.

"Okay." Rhett's over him, spreading him, spitting between his spread cheeks and letting it drip
down. He's sliding a finger in, then two, and Link's squirming.

"Come on, you gotta fuck me, Rhett. I was already close, you can't keep teasing me like this." So
Rhett doesn't wait anymore. He pumps lotion into his hand, slicks himself up, and realizes next
time they probably need to get lube. The thought of next time hits him before he can consider that
it has, and as he slides into Link, he's already positive it'll be over too fast. It doesn't take long, a
few thrusts, shifting his hips and hitting Link in just the right spot before Link is coming on his bed
sheets. "Fuck," he grunts, rocking backward. "I swear to god if you stop before you're done, I'm
gonna be mad."

Rhett doesn't stop. He keeps going, hands on Link's hips as he pulls him back again and again. "Oh
gosh, oh..." he groans, and he's filling Link, groaning loudly like the cinderblock walls are thicker
than they are.

"Fuck," Link says, and when Rhett finally pulls out of him, he can feel the evidence of what
they've done spilling down his leg. "I can't believe we just did that."

"I can't either," Rhett says. He knows he should feel ashamed but he can't bring himself to.

"Next time we're doing it differently," Link says. "Next time I want to see you when you come."

"Next time?"

"Yeah, like we're only ever gonna do that once? Stop kidding yourself, Rhett," Link says.

"Stop kidding yourself, Rhett," Rhett answers, tone mocking, wiggling his head. "Next time you're
riding me so I don't have to do all the work," he chuckles.

It's all in jest. This was a long time coming, and the tension has melted away. That night, Link
doesn't even bother going to his own bed. He already knows. Next time is right now.
 Bruised
Chapter Summary

Set in childhood, Link gets a bruise and Rhett tends to it. Rated G.

“Ow! Gosh, Rhett, it hurts real bad, it’s stinging!” Link grabbed his shin and sank to the ground,
rocking back and forth and making a hiss with each sharp inhale of breath.

Rhett ran back to him, rocks skidding under his sneakers. “Let me see it, bo. Let me look.”

Link carefully pulled his hands back from it, wincing so he wouldn’t have to look.

“It’s okay, buddyroll. It’s just a bruise. See? No blood.” Rhett moved Link’s hand carefully from
it. He should’ve known better than to run so far ahead, but his legs were so long it was hard not to
get ahead of Link sometimes, to go too fast when they were heading toward the woods to explore.

“It still hurts,” Link said, sniffing. He was trying to act tough, to not cry in front of his best friend.

“I know, bo. Here. Let me see it.” Rhett dipped his head low and got closer, letting Link lift his leg
to close the distance a little. “I think it’s gonna heal just fine. Might have a bump for a few days.”
Lightning-quick, before he could think about what he was doing, Rhett dipped in and kissed it
gently, just like what his momma would do when he was younger. When he realized he’d done it,
he was worried it would be weird. Instead, he shook his head and stood up, dusting his jeans off
and reaching a hand out to pull Link up. “Come on. Let’s go.”

“Okay,” Link said, taking his hand and letting himself get yanked to his feet by his best friend.
This time, Rhett didn’t go so quickly. Link took note of that, and of everything else that had
happened since he got hurt. “Hey, Rhett?”

“Yeah?”

“Thanks.”
 Tickle Me
Chapter Summary

Link worries they're too old for tickle fights. An unexpected consequence of one has
him feeling like he might be right. NSFWish.

It’s all Link can do to catch a breath with Rhett’s hands on his waist, squeezing and tickling
intently. He’s not quite sure how it got to this point -- they haven’t done something like this since
they were kids, laughing so loud their parents hushed them when they were sleeping over -- and it
feels good but so weird. Things are different now, the way they’ve grown.

They’ll be adults soon.

Adults shouldn’t do this, he thought, not really. But he let go and gave in because Rhett’s hand was
making its way around his thigh and he was squirming, trying his hardest not to squeal like a pig
with how hard he was laughing. He couldn’t let Rhett keep getting the upper hand, not like this, so
he flipped them, pinning Rhett to the ground and straddling his hips, getting his hands up under
Rhett’s chin and tickling his neck. “You think you’re going to tickle me? Nuh-uh. You’re going to
pay for that.”

They don’t have to be quiet with their laughter tonight. Now they’re old enough to stay home alone
and Link’s mom is at work on an overnight shift. It’s just he and Rhett in his bedroom and he’s not
bothering to be quiet as he moves his hands to Rhett’s armpits, trying to elicit a giggle.

Instead, something else is happening as he shifts his hips and pushes against Rhett in search of a
laugh. Rhett’s breath catches in his throat and his face is suddenly serious. It takes Link a second to
realize, to release the grip he has on Rhett, but he doesn’t back off of him. Instead, he bites his lip
and glances down.

It’s not anything, surely not, just the result of friction. It means nothing, Link tries to convince
himself, but he’s still not sure he wants to move. Instead, he pauses, waits, tries to figure out what
to do next because he’s not sure they’re in a tickle fight anymore.

Rhett tries to snap them both out of their haze, flipping them again and lying down on top of Link.
“I’m dead. Tickle fight’s over. I won. I’m dead.” Link’s face-first against the ground and his hard
length is pressing against the floor. It hurts a little but that’s okay. It’s the easiest way to will it
away, he figures. Rhett’s doing the right thing to push him against the floor like that, make it
easier, except Rhett’s so close, Rhett’s on him, and there’s not friction as an excuse for why he’s
still so hard.

Rhett shifts, moves, his voice barely above a whisper now. “I’m dead,” he breaths against Link’s
ear. One part of Rhett isn’t dead, though. One part of him is very much alive and pressing into
Link’s right buttcheek. Link realizes he’s right. They’re too old for tickle parties.
 Photograph
Chapter Summary

Link tries to capture the perfect photograph to remember their hike. Rated G.

“Come here,” Link says, tugging Rhett closer to him, getting their faces near each other as he pulls
his cell phone out. The lighting of their afternoon hike is just right to make Rhett practically glow.

“What?”

“Smile.” Link knows Rhett won’t smile. He’ll make that ridiculous face he makes, either the one
where he opens his mouth a little, or the one with that smug grin he gets where he acts like he
knows more than anyone else. “Come on, can’t you give me a real smile?” Link laments as he
pulls his phone down and looks at the picture he took of the two of them.

“You know I’m not smiling like that,” Rhett says. “Come on, the sun’s going to set before we get
there. And what’s it matter, anyway? We both know you’re not going to post that on Instagram.”

“Maybe not, but I had other plans for it,” Link says, shrugging and picking up his pack again,
following Rhett. Rhett doesn’t ask him what plans he has, not really. He’s too set on the
destination. When they reach the top of the hill, sun setting around them, Link tries again, lifting
his cell phone camera and raising it to capture Rhett in frame. He’s really looking like the sun god
he is now, the oranges and reds of the day’s sunset shining on his face. He looks content, a soft
smile on his face without the realization that a camera is on him. Link snaps the picture, just Rhett,
then turns and gets himself in the frame, too. He smiles, Rhett behind him, still unaware, and he
snaps another.

He’s going to frame those later, put them on his desk, look at them everyday. Sure, Rhett’s right
there and he has the real thing to look at, but that’s not the point of it anyway. He still likes to have
the print, the picture of Rhett looking so good right there.

What he doesn’t realize is that Rhett has the same thing in mind that night when he clicks on the
lantern in their tent. It’s soft enough that Link doesn’t stir, and anyway, he’s a hard sleeper,
especially after a long hike. For every sleeping picture of Link on social media, Rhett’s easily got
two or three more, just for him. Some are on his phone, backed up to the cloud. Others are tucked
neatly inside of an album of photos spanning their lifetime together. One of them stays in his wallet
and no one knows about it. This one, though, he thinks he’ll put on his desk, because he’s pretty
sure that’s what Link is going to do with the photos he thinks Rhett didn’t notice him taking.
 Icebreaker
Chapter Summary

Rhett watches Link break the ice at an industry party and the nerves get to him. Link
calms him down in the only way he can. Rated G.

Rhett was nervous. He was pretty sure everyone in the room could tell, too. It was his job right
now to fetch the drinks, wait at the bar with Stevie until the right moment, until it felt like Link had
broken the ice enough to help. “Hopefully he’s not saying anything too weird,” Rhett mumbled,
and Stevie chuckled.

“What can be worse than telling John Mayer he loves him?”

“Nothing, I guess,” Rhett said, taking a sip of a drink. It was Link’s, but it didn’t matter. He was
thirsty and nervous and the bartender was still making his. Link wouldn’t mind.

Link was always in his element working the room, and Rhett wished he felt that bold, that okay.
Online, he could be loud and boisterous, and no one would realize how self-conscious he
constantly was if they glanced, watched an episode or two. Link knew him better, though, knew
that he wasn’t good at initiating the conversation. Even at his most awkward, Link was better at it.

Rhett kept watching, waiting for his drink, and once he got it in hand, his eyes stayed locked on
Link. He stood up taller from how he’d been leaning on the bar and Stevie knew that was her cue
to go over. “Ready?”

“Yeah,” Rhett said. He didn’t feel ready, but he had to be. Link looked at him from across the
room, giving a small smile. Where Rhett had been tense, that soft, warm smile from the person he
felt most comfortable with in the world said everything. It’s okay. I’m here. We’re going to do this.
I’m proud of you. Come here, brother. I love you. It’s okay. Now, he felt ready.
 Cold Hands, Warm Heart
Chapter Summary

When Link loses his glove skiing, Rhett finds a way to warm him up. Rated T.

“I’m s-s-so cold, Rhett,” Link stutters, chapped lips quivering as his eyes close a little. He’s
freezing and Rhett can tell. Heck, his mouth is almost blue.

“I know, buddy. We’re almost there.” It’s cold on the ski lift. Too cold. But at the top of it, there’s
two choices: go down the slopes, or hop off and go into the lodge for cocoa, hopefully with a
splash of something else to keep them nice and cozy.

Rhett’s holding Link’s hand, the one the glove fell off of somewhere earlier that day. It’s too cold
for him not to have the glove on, and Rhett knows it. It’s almost too cold to be outside, and he’s
not sure how everyone else is having a blast skiing. Maybe they’ve been in LA for too long, gotten
too used to the heat.

“I’m going to keep you warm, okay? We’ll be up there soon.” Rhett reassures him again. Link’s
too cold to talk. He’s happy they’ve booked a room at the lodge itself. He’d hoped to book a cabin,
something a little quieter so they could get some work done in the evenings, but they were all full
by the time Rhett had made the reservation. The perk -- the reason he was happy -- was that they
could go to their room instead of having to get back out in the cold, especially now that Link had
lost his glove.

“Can’t wait much longer. Need cocoa.” Link’s leaning into his inability to talk from being too
cold, knowing Rhett will feel at least a little sorry for him and grab the cocoa for both of them. It’s
a work trip, and Rhett’s promised himself he’ll behave and not try to make a move, but the fact that
he’s holding Link’s hand is already shredding his willpower considerably.

Link feels better when they get inside the lodge, slowly heading toward the room. “We’ll call room
service instead of waiting in that line,” Rhett nods over. It’s worth the added expense to have it
delivered. The second they get in the room, though, Rhett forgets the promise completely. Link’s
still shivering, a little exaggerated but he still is.

“Still cold?” Rhett asks, pulling his own gloves off and shedding his coat. Link isn’t willing to do
the same. He gives a small nod. “Let me feel.” Rhett puts his bare hands on Link’s. The ungloved
hand is frigid. “Jeez, Link, you’re not kidding. You’re cold. Let me warm you up.”

Friction, Rhett’s hands rubbing Link’s only makes Link wince. “Ow,” he says. Rhett’s rubbing too
hard. Rhett bites his lip, ponders for a second, thinking about how to make Link warmer.

“Okay, here.” He takes Link’s hand and slides it up under his shirt, placing it on his chest near his
heart. It’s so cold he startles a little, shivering, too, but he holds Link’s hand in place. He can
already feel their bodies starting to reach an equilibrium, his skin cooling to Link’s hand, Link’s
hand warming to his chest. “Better?”

“Better,” Link says, but now he’s barely breathing a whisper. He can feel Rhett’s heart beat under
his hand. Thum-thum-pause-thum-thum-pause. It feels like it’s beating really hard. Maybe because
it is. Link’s hand on his skin is electric, and even if it’s too cold, he feels like he’s burning.

“Better enough to take your coat off?” Rhett asks. Link nods and pulls his hand away, unbuttoning
his coat, unzipping it, shedding it off of him. Rhett’s still watching him, still staring, still willing
Link to put his hands back under his sweater for some reason.

“My hands are still cold,” Link says. It’s a request, and Rhett can tell, a question of Is this okay?
But he doesn’t fully wait for Rhett to answer. He steps toward him, and Rhett takes his hands,
putting them back under his shirt, both of them this time. Link’s hand isn’t on his heart anymore.
It’s on his pecs, and Link isn’t just letting it rest there. He’s rubbing.

Rhett lets out a small moan, but then he stops himself, willing himself to focus and not make this
anything more than what it is for Link. For Link, it’s just a way to get warm, he’s sure of it. “I’m
so tight, so stressed--” Rhett starts to say. He’s trying to make a joke, break the ice between them,
shatter his nerves.

“Don’t make this weird, man,” Link says.

“Sorry,” Rhett tells him.

“Y’know I was thinking before you started singing that stupid song--” Link starts, taking one step
closer to Rhett and continuing to tease his fingers over Rhett’s nipples “--that you’ve been so good
about warming me up today.” Rhett doesn’t know what Link’s getting at, but he has goosebumps,
like he’s the one who’s been so cold.

“Yeah?” Rhett asks, licking his lips.

“Well, I know it’s weird, but I sort of thought, uh… I sort of thought about kissin’ ya, but then you
started in on that weird song and I realized how dumb that is.” Link’s hands are still rubbing
Rhett’s chest, and his hands are warm now. Rhett feels like he’s on fire.

“It’s dumb?” Rhett asks. Everything feels like it’s moving in slow-mo, some bizarre filter on real
life that makes it seem surreal and dream-like.

“It’s, uh… I don’t know. Not dumb, just… weird?” Link asks. It isn’t like he hasn’t thought about
this before, and right now he’s close to Rhett, so close to him, touching his chest, feeling the way
Rhett’s breath is catching. They’ve been in a million hotel rooms before and it’s crossed his mind
but he’s never had reason to act on it. Now, he’s got reason.

“You know what’s weird, Link?” Rhett asks. “The fact that you’re playing with my nipples right
now and you think kissin’ me is going to be weird.” Link hasn’t even realized that’s what he’s
doing. It is, though, what he’s doing, just for something to do with his hands.

“Oh,” Link says. He doesn’t stop playing with Rhett’s nipples even after he’s made aware of it.
“So it’s not weird, then?”

“Not weird,” Rhett says. He can make a different promise to himself on a different day. Today,
behaving is out the window, and Link’s hands don’t move from his body even as Rhett steps
forward and presses his lips to Link’s. He suspects they won’t get much work done that night after
all.
 Saturday Morning
Chapter Summary

Rhett uses his height to come to the rescue more times than he can count in the
suburbs.

For fanbabble, rated G. Prompt: Frisbees and toys stuck in trees too tall to climb.
There’s a tennis racket in your next door neighbor’s oak tree.

Rhett knows exactly what it is when the doorbell rings just before ten on a sunny Saturday
morning. It’s the same thing every Saturday, really, which is why Link knows, too, eyeing him
from across the top of his newspaper without a word. It was a wonder they still subscribed to a
print newspaper, since everyone around them seemed to have changed to digital subscriptions, but
Link liked the feel of the paper in his hands and Rhett liked to snag the puzzles page for long trips
to the bathroom. It worked for them.

Regardless, Rhett had no real surprise when he opened the door to someone about a third of his
size. “Hey, Mr. Rhett? My frisbee’s stuck. Can you get it?”

“I can sure try, buddy. Where is it?” Rhett wrapped his bathrobe tighter around himself and tied it
tightly. It wasn’t entirely necessary for him to wear it outside — he was wearing it over loose,
flowing pajama pants and a tee shirt — but it made him feel a little better about what he was
wearing, mostly because a few moms in the neighborhood couldn’t seem to stop ogling him. Not
that he minded, but he was on a mission now.

He followed the little boy — Joey, he thought his name was — halfway up the cul-de-sac to his
house. “It’s right there!”

“That’s a little high,” Rhett admitted, scratching his beard as he stood there looking at it. It was a
good foot above his reach, stuck high in a tree. If he looked closely, he could see the remnants of a
kite, too, but it was far too ragged and weather-worn to be worth retrieving. Thankfully, of course,
because it was certainly out of his reach. But the frisbee, he wanted to get down. He couldn’t go
disappointing the neighbor kids.

“Can you get it, do you think?” Joey asked, tugging his robe excitedly.

“Maybe. How about you help me find a stick or something,” Rhett asked, and both of them bent
over, scouring the ground for just one from the past storm. With manicured lawns like these,
finding sticks would be impossible, he figured, but it was worth a look.

“Oh! I think I have a baseball bat!” the boy suddenly remembered.

Link watched out the window, coffee in hand. Rhett’s tea was getting cold, and Link considered
brewing a new cup for him. It was Link’s little secret, the way he’d watch Rhett like this, watch
him use his height to his advantage as he stretched to get something out of the trees for the
neighborhood kids. One day, they’d have kids of their own and Rhett would be getting things out
of trees for their kids, but until then, Link liked watching this.

It might have been weird to admit that these little feats of skill, watching Rhett swing a bat gently
to nudge the frisbee from the tree, was incredibly arousing. There was something about his
husband’s long, lean frame, something about him helping others, something about the kind spirit
hidden under Rhett’s fake-gruff exterior. For every cat he’d complained about as they laid in bed
awake at night, he’d saved two from trees and roofs. For every community college he ranted about,
he’d secretly donated to pay for books for students who couldn’t afford them. Link’s husband was
inherently good, and it was something that made him more certain of their future together.

When they’d bought a house here last spring, Link had been unsure that living in the suburbs
would be right for them. He’d pictured them staying in their loft in the city forever. But when
words like “surrogate” and “adoption” started coming up more and more often, he’d had to admit
Rhett was right about needing the extra space. Now, he fully understood as he watched Rhett hand
the frisbee back to the little boy, as they exchanged a high five, Link smiled and returned to the
table, picking up his paper so Rhett would never know he had been watching.

“Hey, babe. Sorry. I got it down!” Rhett said, slipping his shoes off and putting his house slippers
back on as he sat down at the table again.

“Aw, good job. I should’ve gone with you and watched my big strong man at work,” Link quipped.
“What do you say we go back upstairs for a while?” Link asked, putting the paper down again.

“Feeling like a lazy Saturday today?” Rhett asked him, taking a sip of his now-cold tea. “That
sounds real good to me, bo.”
 Ding Dong Ditch
Chapter Summary

For anon. Three nine year olds ding-dong-ditch your house every Sunday. This time
one of them leaves behind a dandelion for you. Rated G.

The first time it happened, Rhett wasn’t quite sure what to do about the fact that he’d just been
ding, dong, ditched. Cole just shook his head and closed the door and ducked back inside,
muttering under his breath “damn kids” like it was okay for him to use bad language like that, like
he wasn’t one of those damn kids himself at their last house, the kind who would ding, dong, ditch
people on a Sunday afternoon.

The second time it happened, Rhett was surprised that it happened again. One ding, dong, ditch
was one thing. Two on two subsequent Sundays? That was quite another. Whoever was doing it
seemed to have the timing down: after church, after Sunday dinner, after things were calm for the
day. He wasn’t entirely sure what to make of it.

Part of him considered leaving a note before the third time, but he didn’t want to presume he was
that interesting enough to have it happen a third time anyway. Heck, maybe whoever was doing it
wasn’t even trying to get his attention. They were probably there for Cole or to bug his parents, or
maybe it was some weird “welcome to the neighborhood” ritual the kids did. Rhett couldn’t be
sure. But then it happened a third time, and Rhett kicked himself for not leaving a note anyway.

The fourth time it happened, Rhett was prepared. He hid around the side of his house, behind a
shrub and he waited. And waited. And an hour after the doorbell usually rang, with no sign of
anyone there, Rhett headed back inside disappointed. He barely got the door closed behind him
when it happened. He wondered if the people doing it had seen him go inside and had been
waiting, but if that was the case, he wondered why they didn’t wait longer to ring the bell so as not
to get caught. He peeked out the window and saw three kids run down the street, all of them
around his age: a girl with bold red hair in braided pigtails, a boy with hair not far off from his
own, but who was much, much shorter than he was. Part of him wanted to chase them down the
street, but he didn’t figure he could get to them in time anyway.

The fifth time, Rhett stood by the door. This time, he was determined to chase them down, to
demand answers as to why they kept ringing his doorbell and running away. “What’re you doing
here?” Cole asked him, walking past Rhett. Rhett had started standing by the door but was now
sitting down and reading a book. He’d been waiting too long for them to show up. When they did,
he ripped open the door, but they were already halfway down the driveway.

“Hey!” Rhett yelled. The shorter one with the brown hair turned around and smiled at him, giving
him a small wave. Rhett could see his bright blue eyes from there. But then he took off again,
bounding up the street to catch up with his friends. He didn’t say anything back. Rhett thought he
looked vaguely familiar, one of the kids from church. He couldn’t be sure — how would anyone
know someone from a quick glance from across a road? — but he was hopeful. If it was that kid,
he was pretty sure they were around the same age. Next time, he was determined to catch him.

The next Sunday, no one rang his doorbell. Rhett worried that catching them in the act had stopped
whatever game this was, had ruined the whole thing. Mostly, he sulked around the house, kicking a
soccer ball against the wall until his dad told him to go outside and kick it against the fence
instead, or better yet, go shoot some hoops now that they had a basketball goal screwed onto the
house above the garage. He did what his dad said, heading outside and tossing the ball into the
hoop again and again, but still, he felt annoyed and frustrated.

“Hey, you’re pretty good at that,” he heard a small voice behind him.

“Thanks,” he said, shooting again and making it. Once he grabbed his ball, he turned around,
looking at the person behind him. Brown hair. Blue eyes. “I’m Rhett.” Rhett did what he was
supposed to, extending his hand, ball tucked under one arm.

“I’m Link,” the boy said, taking his hand and shaking it. “Anyway, I gotta go. Bye!” He took off
before Rhett could even ask if he wanted to play.

The next Sunday, Rhett didn’t bother waiting by the door. They hadn’t come the Sunday before,
and he was sure they wouldn’t come this time. But then the doorbell rang. Rhett raced down the
stairs, two at a time, yanking open the door, certain he’d missed them. Instead, he saw nobody, and
looked down to see a dandelion, one single dandelion, on his front step. He picked it up and looked
around, and at the end of his driveway he saw Link. Rhett knew he’d taken his time getting down
the stairs, and he knew Link should have been long gone. As soon as Link saw him, he turned
away, poised to run. “Wait!” Rhett called after him.

“What?”

“You want to play some basketball?”

 Babyish
Chapter Summary

For anon. Rated G. The fire hydrant breaks, water cascading out of it. Every kid and
teenager takes a turn splashing in it.

“What in the heck—?” Link asked, skidding his bike to a halt as he looked up the street. He
couldn’t make it out clearly, but there were tons of kids up there, all surrounding something, some
sort of water spray.

“I dunno,” Rhett said, stopping next to Link and putting his feet on the ground, balancing his bike
between his legs as he stood to full height to see, shielding his eyes from the bright, overbearing
sun with his hand. “Looks like a lot of water, that’s for sure.”

“Wanna check it out?” Link cocked his head to one side to look up at his best friend.

“Sure, why not?” Curiosity was getting the best of them and Link was hoping to find out more.
Besides, if it was some kind of water, it was hot and he was a little desperate for relief anyway.

When they got closer, Link could make it out better. Water was splattering against the pavement,
hard like rain, and a rainbow arched through the air just through it. Ten, maybe fifteen kids were
running through the spray, and it was clear now that a fire hydrant had burst.

Link didn’t think the kids there had a half-bad idea. It was awfully hot and he was dying to take a
run through. “What do you think?” Link asked Rhett, nodding toward the water.

“I dunno, man. It seems kinda babyish to me,” he said, shrugging. “Want to ride down to the
cemetery?”

“Yeah, whatever,” Link sulked. On the one hand, he didn’t care if it was babyish. He was hot and
wanted to cool off. On the other hand, Rhett was right. They were thirteen. It wasn’t that long
before they’d be in high school and it seemed stupid to go play in the puddles like a bunch of six-
year-olds or something.

“What?” Rhett asked, whipping his bike around to face Link, braking hard and almost forcing Link
to run into him.

“Nothin’. Just forget it."

“No, tell me,” Rhett insisted.

“I was just thinkin’ it’s hot is all. You’re right, though. It’s babyish.” Link looked at the ground.

“It is hot,” Rhett said, stepping off of his bike and wheeling it to one side, tossing it down into the
grass on the side of the street. “Come on, then.” He waved for Link to join him, and Link watched
as Rhett peeled his shirt off and tossed it on his bike. Link wasn’t even thinking about the fact that
he could get in trouble if he came home soaking wet, if he was sick as a dog from cold water on his
skin on an overly hot day. It didn’t matter. All that mattered was that Rhett was on board with the
plan now.
Link grinned and took his shirt off, too, racing just behind Rhett toward the water. They tried to
dodge the kids younger than them, tried not to run into them, and when Rhett got close, he put his
hands on top of the stream of water, angling it to hit Link in the chest.

“Still think it’s babyish?” Link asked, laughing and standing next to his sun-and-water-drenched
best friend.

“Aw, come on, Link, you can’t hold that against me,” he groaned.

“I can,” Link said. “We almost missed out on all of this fun because of you,” Link said, but he
laughed. Rhett was on board and enjoying himself, lying in the street under the flow and trying to
make some sort of splash angel by waving his arms back and forth wildly. They could grow up
later, or maybe next summer. Right now, there was water bursting from the side of the sidewalk far
into the air, and until the fire department showed up to fix it, Link didn’t plan on growing up quite
yet.
 Other Side of Town
Chapter Summary

Link heads to the other side of town to help his step-sister sell Girl Scout cookies.
Rated G.

“You wanna buy some girl scout cookies?” Link asked sheepishly, kicking at the rocks under his
feet as he talked to the taller, blonde-headed kid at the door. Living on the other side of town, Link
had never encountered him before, figuring he must’ve gone to the school in the next town over.

“You don’t look like no girl scout I’ve ever seen,” the kid said.

“I’m helpin’ my sister,” Link mumbled. “Well, my step-sister. Anyway, do you wanna buy cookies
or not?”

“Not. Do I look like I got any money to you? Come back when my parents are home maybe,” Rhett
grumbled. “What kind you got anyway?”

“All the usual ones. Thin mints and lemon ones and stuff. Anyway, I don’t have them with me.
You gotta order them and then I’ll bring them back.”

“Do I gotta pay now?” Rhett asked. His stomach growled at the thought of cookies, even if he
didn’t have the money. He figured he could get some in time if he had the chance to pay later.

“Yeah, you gotta pay now and then I’ll bring the cookies when they get here,” Link answered.

“Dang. Nevermind then,” Rhett told him. “See ya.” He started to close the door but then stopped it
mid-swing-shut. “Wait a second. You live around here?”

“Other side of town, yeah,” Link shrugged.

“You’re about my age, right?” Rhett asked him.

“I dunno, what’s your age?”

“Eleven.”

“Yeah, I’m about your age. Why you so interested in my age anyway?” Link asked, swiping his
nose with his sleeve.

“Just askin’. You wanna hang out sometime?” Rhett asked.

“Yeah, okay. We could maybe meet at the cemetery. It’s about halfway between us I think.”

“Cool. Tomorrow?” Rhett asked.

“Yeah, okay.”

“If you ever have any of those cookies, you should bring ‘em. Maybe I can borrow some cash from
my parents. Anyway, see you around.”
“See ya.”

Link hadn’t made the sale, but he wasn’t much of a salesperson anyway. Thankfully, he made a
new friend, and that was really all he’d hoped for when he agreed to help anyway.
 One Box
Chapter Summary

Rhett spots a girl scout cookie stand outside of the grocery store and tries to convince
Link that they need just one box. Rated G.

Link kept his head turned away from the Girl Scouts in front of the store as he headed in, but he
knew there was going to be trouble as soon as Rhett spotted them. “Can we please get some Girl
Scout cookies?”

“Rhett, they’re outside of a grocery store. Those same cookies are inside the store for half the
price.”

“But it’s not the same!” Rhett whined, rolling his eyes. “Come on, baby, just one box?”

“Like you can pick just one box,” Link snorted.

“I can! We’ll just get one thing of samoas. Just one,” Rhett said. Then he paused. “Ooh. Or maybe
some Thin Mints!” He scratched his beard. “Oh man, or the lemon ones. What are they called
again?”

“See? One box, my ass,” Link said. “Fine. Go. One box.” Link took his husband’s hand and
walked toward the table, reaching for his wallet.

“Would you like to buy some Girl Scout cookies?” a young girl asked from behind the table.

“Yes, please,” Rhett said. “I think we’d like one box of the lemon ones, please.”

“Make that two boxes. And two Samoas,” Link said. “And a box of Thin Mints for him, I guess.”

As they walked inside, boxes in hand, Rhett leaned in to whisper, “one box, huh?”
 Wired
Chapter Summary

Link is in the midst of finals crunch time. Rhett is supportive. Rated G.

Link wasn’t sure how many cups of coffee he’d had that day. Three? Five? Seven? He didn’t
know. All he knew was, studying was vital. Without coffee, he’d never manage. He pored over his
textbook, trying to answer the questions. His heart was racing and his mind was spinning, and now
he was starting to wonder if the caffeine intended to keep him awake was more of a distraction than
a help.

He tried to keep himself focused but his leg shook, the entire desk shaking with it. Rhett glanced
over. “Hey, uh, buddyroll? You going to shake through the floor or what?”

Link looked up. “Huh?”

“Your leg.”

Link glanced at his leg and saw the bounce. “Oh. Shoot. Sorry.” Then, his focus was back on his
work. “As soon as this final is over I can cool it on the coffee.”

Rhett nodded. “Yeah. I get what you mean.”

Finals were impossibly hard, especially this time around. They’d both been complaining about
them non-stop, and now it was crunch time. Link was afraid of failing. He could barely afford to
take the class the first time, but a second time? He was trying to avoid it. He stood up, pacing for a
moment, then walking to the coffee maker to fill another cup.

“You’re losing it,” Rhett said.

“I’m friggin’ wired, man!” Link answered, taking a sip and sitting back down. Crunch time. He
really, really needed to get this done.

---

Rhett glanced over. Link was quiet. Too quiet. He couldn’t help but smile as he saw his best friend,
slumped over the desk. Standing, he grabbed the blanket from the top bunk and walked over to
Link, draping it over his shoulders. Link didn’t move as Rhett lifted his head up and exchanged the
textbook — drool and all — with a pillow. “Night, bo.”
 Study
Chapter Summary

Rhett had studied with Link. Rhett had studied Link.

Rated E (explicit)

Rhett had studied with Link.

Rhett had studied Link.

He’d studied with Link for his middle school English test while studying the way Link bit his lip
and said things that were accidentally a little bit inappropriate.

He’d studied porn magazines found in the woods, buried behind a house somewhere, and he’d
studied the blush that blossomed on Link’s cheeks as he watched Link pour over them too.

He’d studied for high school calculus with him, and he’d studied the way Link had groaned when
he struggled to get the right answer, and then wondered if he’d sound the same if anything other
than calculus got under his skin.

He’d studied for at least two classes where their degrees overlapped, engineering classes they had
to take together, and he’d studied the way Link stretched out across the floor of their dorm room,
shirt off, legs splayed out, and he’d considered pressing his body onto Link’s, but he’d resisted.
Except when Link had started a fight, and then he’d wrestled him until he had to play dead on
Link’s body, rolling off only when he was afraid Link might know how he felt.

He’d studied the basics of starting a company, the initial moves they needed to make to get
sponsors and try to film and what schedule they’d post on, and where to even upload their videos in
the first place, and he’d studied the pensive look on Link’s face, the look in his eyes behind his
new glasses, and he’d thought about where they were headed together.

He’d studied the analytics, the videos that were still getting the most views this far into their
channel history. They were over a thousand episodes in, and as he studied the details, he studied
the sound of Link’s breath, in and out as he sat at his desk and worked, staring at the back of his
head from his standing desk across the room.

He’d studied how to write a novel, going back to the roots of their hometown, and he’d watched
Link sleep on the plane, studying the way his mouth hung open as he snored softly, careening
through the air toward their hometown and the foundation of their life together.

And that night, in the hotel room, he’d thrown all study aside, except the study of the lines of
Link’s lithe body, the curve of his hip and the prominence of his Adam’s apple, pressing kisses
down the length of him and listening to the subtle moan. He’d been studying Link for years. He
knew what made him think, what made him mad, what tickled him, what made him laugh.

And as he pressed into Link, pressing his lips to Link’s, feeling the vibration of Link’s needy
whine against his own mouth, he studied what got him off. Mostly, he studied that so he could do it
all over again.
 Melody
Chapter Summary

Rhett sounds amazing when he's in the throes of passion, but right now, things are
different. Rated M. TW Angst

There was a certain melody to the way Rhett sounded when he had his head thrown back. That
melody wasn’t much like the ones they came up with when they were writing songs together, but
they were even more beautiful, if that was possible.

There was a melody in the gasps, in the moans, in the rhythms of their movements together.

But there were times where it was discordant, broken strums and harsh beats and rhythms that
didn’t make sense. Link felt like they were there now, like things were shifted between them so
one of them wasn’t on key, and the other was playing the wrong time. He glanced up at Rhett from
the other side of the desk, studying his face, trying to figure out how to make it right, how to play
the melody that rang truest to them.

He watched as Rhett went off on a rant, a tangent, an angry refrain and he sighed, looking the other
way as the sounds got out of tune and out of the nature of the melody he loved so much.

And after, when he grabbed Rhett’s wrist in their office and looked in his eyes, there was no longer
the glistening greens and golds that their tones evoked together. Instead, there was cloudiness, a
sad song playing behind the scenes, and Link leaned in, kissing him softly. “What happened to us,
bo?” he asked, his concern evident in the low rumbles of his voice, the thoughts playing, jumbled
in his head.

“Business. Life. Lack of time.” Staccato beats far away from the ones he’d hear when he was
inside of him. Not the same, not as beautiful, a sloppy, unpractised melody.

“Yeah,” Link breathed, and Rhett tugged him closer. “I want to fix it, Rhett.” This was a different
kind of dance, a different tune, one they’d flowed in and out of through miscommunications over
the years. As Rhett held him, fingers tracing up his spine under his shirt, he listened to the patter of
his heartbeat, the hum of the drum inside of his chest.

“I do, too. We will.”

That was the struggle of this melody, this broken, discordant tune. They both wanted to make their
love a song worth hearing, but acknowledging the issue was easier than bringing them back into
harmony. Link nuzzled at his neck and listened to Rhett, the steady inhale and exhale, his
symphony of breath and wind and air, and thought about things.

There was a certain melody to the way Rhett sounded when he had his head thrown back. This
melody wasn’t like that, but given enough time, they always — always — come back into tune.
This was no different. This was just one moment in their symphony, one broken note in their
continuous melody.
 Heartache
Chapter Summary

Link's heart was aching, and he was pretty sure it had something to do with Rhett's
new girlfriend. Probably. Rated G (general audiences)

heart (noun): a hollow muscular organ that pumps the blood through the circulatory system by
rhythmic contraction and dilation. In vertebrates there may be up to four chambers (as in humans),
with two atria and two ventricles.

the central or innermost part of something.

(verb, informal): like very much; love.

ache (noun): a continuous or prolonged dull pain in a part of one's body.

(verb): suffer from a continuous dull pain.

Link’s heart ached. He didn’t really know how to explain what it was about the fact that his heart
was aching, but it was. He laid on his bed and looked up at the ceiling. Why the heck would his
heart be aching? Was he going to be the first-ever seventh grader to have a heart attack? Maybe. He
bit his nails and kept staring at the ceiling, nibbling at his cuticles as he sighed heavily.

His best friend, Rhett McLaughlin, his lifelong brother and partner in crime, was on a date. And
Link Neal was sitting here staring at the ceiling frustrated. He was happy for Rhett, sure. The guy
was good with girls. But somehow Link couldn’t get a girl. He’d tried, but Rhett was just better at
it.

Maybe Link was just jealous. He hadn’t even really noticed girls until Rhett was going for them,
and now they seemed like the only thing on his mind. If he was honest with himself, it was mostly
because friendships seemed easier when they both had a girl on their arms, but that was kind of
silly. He bit his lip.

Why did his chest feel like it was caving in? Why did his heart feel like it might beat too hard and
burst out of his chest? Link decided there was only one logical reason: he was in love with Rhett’s
girlfriend. Nothing else made sense. Why else would it bother him that Rhett was on a date with
some girl and not able to hang out.

That had to be it. He must have wanted what Rhett had, must have wanted to be with her, must
have wanted the way they were holding hands, going out with a girl and taking her to the movies.
His heart ached thinking about it, chest beating hard. He thought about it. He needed a girlfriend.
No, he needed Rhett’s girlfriend.

He pulled the blankets over his head and closed his eyes. His thoughts floated to Rhett’s date.
Rhett, holding her hand. Rhett, leaning in to kiss her. He licked his lips, eyes squeezed shut, and
turned his head to graze his lips against his pillow, pretending. What if he were the one to kiss Rhe
— he means her. He shakes his head. What if he held his—her hand?
A thought floated to his mind and he pushed it away.
No, his heartache wasn’t about Rhett McLaughlin.

At least, Link couldn’t let himself believe that.

And he could never, ever let Rhett know.
 Audience
Chapter Summary

When Link has an audience, he changes who he is so no one knows how he really
feels. Rhett can't do that. (Rated G, tw wives mention)

Link was always aware of the audience he had around him. The crew, absolutely, but the viewers
at home and the people who surrounded them during everything they did. He didn’t have the
luxury of switching the part of his brain off that made him relax. When they sat down at the desk,
he put on his Link Mask, the perception of who he was when the cameras rolled, the person he was
when everyone watched and laughed. He suspended his intelligence and let loose on the screen.

He’d shared this with Rhett a million times, explained that the Link he was on screen was a little
different than the Link he was on his own. Not that he needed to. Rhett knew the difference. Rhett
knew the Link that was on, the Link that had an audience, and the Link that was open and
affectionate and didn’t have anyone looking at him. Perhaps Rhett knew that side of him better
than anyone. Maybe he even knew it better than Link himself.

Rhett wasn’t like that, though. Rhett didn’t have his on and off moments. Or, he did. There was a
portion of Rhett’s mind that could detach and become on-screen Rhett. Louder, wilder, more
conspiratorial, all of it. More competitive. Those aspects of his personality worked well for the
viewers. But Rhett couldn’t hide himself behind a mask the way Link could. He couldn’t keep his
feelings or his thoughts to himself.

He didn’t notice at first, but no one ever notices. Not really. But Rhett was a glutton for positive
comments, and as he scrolled tumblr one night, secret account out in full force, he looked over the
things people said. The fics, the stories, the art. “Hey, Jessie. Look at this gif and tell me what you
think of it.” He held his phone out to her. He needed to hear her thoughts. He needed to hear Jessie
say, “that’s you, looking at your best friend.”

She glanced up from her book in bed, smiling at the gif as she took it in. “You’re looking at the
monitor, right?”

“Yeah.”

“At Link?”

“Yeah.”

“I swear, the love is palpable. I can feel it,” she said. “Have you told him?”

“Told him what?”

“That you’re in love with him.”

Rhett blushed furiously. “I’m not. I was just wondering if you noticed how my beard looked. I
don’t know... I don’t know what you’re talking about.”

Jessie nodded knowingly, the smirk on her face that Rhett knew all-too-well. “What?” he asked
with a huff.

“I’m just saying, when he knows he has an audience, he’s good at hiding how he feels. You’re not.
And even if you were, I know you better than that.” She took his hand and entwined their fingers.
“You should tell him.”

“I don’t think so,” Rhett said.

“If he looks at the gifs like you do, he’ll see.”

She was right. When Rhett had an audience, all he could do was show the audience what he
thought and felt. But Link? Link was hard to read. His audience face blocked everything. Jessie
pulled out her phone, and he went back to studying the gif on his own until she passed hers over, a
short video she’d taken of Rhett and Link on a family hike.

“What’s this?” he asked.

“Link. Without an audience. Looking at you.”

Rhett couldn’t help but smile. In one short video, a lot of the questions he’d been thinking about
for the past hour were answered.

“And for the record, your beard looks fine there. But that’s not what you wanted to know.”
 Audience (Version 2)
Chapter Summary

At the club, Rhett and Link are drunk and want to try something. That means an
audience. Kind of. (Rated E/Explicit)

Link knew when he slipped under the table at the club that they had an audience. Rhett, of course,
tugged at his hair and hissed, “people are watching.”

Link just smiled up at him. Yeah, they were. That was the whole point.

Plus, no one was watching as much as Rhett liked to think they were watching. They weren’t, in
fact, actually watching. Rhett just worried they were. But that worry worked because it got him
hard. Both of them, really.

They had too many drinks. That was the first problem that came with all of thise. They’d both had
one or two or three too many and that was what spurred this on. Link had been damn near dry
humping Rhett in the bar and Rhett had made a dumb joke about Link sucking him off. And here
they were. Link, under the table, fully aware of the audience they had, and Rhett, trying to keep his
composure and not let on that they were doing this.

Half the fun, though, was the fact that they were doing this. That was what he wanted. For people
to know and also not know, or at least, for people to think they knew, even if they didn’t. Link
could feel the chill in his spine, the idea they might get kicked out and thrown out of this club. His
hands gripped Rhett’s thighs as he buried his face against the fabric, nuzzling and kissing, biting at
his thigh through his jeans. Rhett hadn’t made it easy on him, wearing the tight pair of jeans that
made his ass look irresistible. Getting them slid down far enough was going to be a challenge.

Link was up for it. He lifted Rhett’s shirt with his nose, kissing and licking at his lower stomach
and nipping at the skin as he moved his hands to his zipper. It was easy enough. Rhett tangled his
fingers in his hair. This was what they needed. A moment of private desperation in the least private
place he could find. He grazed Rhett’s thigh and started to pull his pants down after, nuzzling his
lower stomach, nose pressed against the patch of blond hair there as he took Rhett into his mouth.
His head bobbed a little bit, knees sore on the floor, and in the back of his mind, he wondered how
much the audience around them noticed what they were doing in this booth in the corner.

Rhett teased his hair, and every time Link glanced up, he could see Rhett searching around to make
sure they were fine. Link couldn’t believe the thrill that came with doing this. They’d pushed close
to something like this before, but they’d never actually done it. Now, they were both too drunk to
back down, and Link wasn’t going to stop this from proceeding if Rhett wasn’t. The more he
worked Rhett, the more Rhett’s cock dripped precome onto his tongue.

He tasted like heaven. Or maybe he didn’t. Link was too drunk and excited to care. He kept licking,
tongue running up the length, and he could feel the tension in Rhett’s balls as he caressed his sac.
His hand and mouth worked him faster, heart racing as he heard steps get closer to him. Someone
was walking toward them, and he was sure of it. But as that faded, he realized that over the music,
the chance of hearing anyone approach was completely unlikely. His paranoia was in full-swing,
his mind in panic, and that was most of the thrill of this. Link considered the fact that he could
finish without even being touched at this point.

Rhett was getting closer. Link knew because Rhett tugged his hair harder. That, and he knew Rhett
better than he knew anyone, knew every subtle cue even when the music was blasting and the
lighting was dim. He knew Rhett. And yeah, Rhett was almost there.

Link inhaled sharply, preparing himself just in time for Rhett to cum in his mouth, coating his
tongue, lips slick with spit. He waited until Rhett was done, swallowing it down and tucking Rhett
back into his skinny jeans, hand in place as he zipped them closed and then whispered “is the coast
clear?” Rhett didn’t hear him.

“Is the coast clear?” he said louder, hoping to be heard over the music.

Rhett giggled and shushed him, then tugged him up by his arm, leaning in to say “if you talk that
loud, it’s not really a secret.”

“You couldn’t hear me when I whispered!” Link protested, but before they could keep talking,
Rhett was downing his drink and dragging Link onto the dance floor.

“I wonder if I can get you to finish right here in the middle of everyone,” Rhett said in his ear,
grinding against Link with his thigh. Yeah, Link thought. He absolutely could.
 Daybreak
Chapter Summary

Nighttime meant peace. The break of day meant something else. Rated T.

The first tendrils of morning crept across the windowpane, along the hardwood floor, toward the
bed frame that held two grown men. Two grown men, wrapped in white sheets, one of them softly
snoring with his mouth wide open, the other holding him close, beard grazing across his cheek.

These were the silent moments, or, the almost silent moments. The ones where nothing had been
punctuated with stress yet, the moments where nothing gave them pause or made them feel like
this was wrong, or like they needed to do something productive. Instead, they could just exist.
Exist in each other’s arms, silent and still, without cares or an audience or anything else.

The fear that someone might judge who they are if they found out, that they might lose their
audience if they knew what they meant to each other, that they might become strained or broken by
the commentary or the speculation or the frustration... none of it existed in these quiet moments.

Daybreak was the good time. The light crept higher, up the edge of the bed, up the sheets and
across the fabric. As the light crept into one of their eyes, he turned over, burying his face into the
other’s chest. No, it wasn’t time. Daybreak could wait a few more minutes.
 Tomorrow
Chapter Summary

Tomorrow, Rhett McLaughlin is going to tell Link Neal exactly how he feels. Rated G.

Tomorrow, Rhett McLaughlin is going to get on his bike and drive to the cemetery and look Link
Neal in the eyes and tell him exactly how he feels about him.

Tomorrow, he’s going to put his kickstand down and grab Link and tug him over to a tree and say
“I like you. Like more than friends like you.”

Tomorrow, Link is going to tell Rhett he knew all along and everything is fine and they’ll be
together forever. Or, that’s how Rhett imagines it going.

Tomorrow, Rhett’s going to tell him everything he’s wanted to tell him for so long and Link will
feel the same way for sure. Definitely and 100%.

Tomorrow, Rhett’s not going to be at a loss for words because he’s repeated them again and again
in his head, rehearsing the whole conversation in a shower his dad said was way too long for a
house with four people and doesn’t Rhett have any respect for how much the water bill costs?

Tomorrow, Rhett will say what he intends to say.

Tomorrow, maybe they’ll even kiss.

Tonight, Rhett is a bundle of nervous energy because what if things don’t go the way he planned?
What if things get all messed up and Link hates him forever and their friendship is ruined because
they’re not on the same page and Link thinks he’s crazy and the whole town thinks their wrong,
and every other possible thing that could be a mistake about this?

Tomorrow, Rhett’s pretty sure he’s just going to ride his bike over to the cemetery and they’ll
decide where they’ll spend their day. Maybe it’ll be the Cape Fear River. Maybe they’ll go for ice
cream.

Tomorrow, Rhett’s going to bite his tongue and be Link’s friend and never say a word about how
he feels.

Tomorrow, Rhett’s going to ignore how he feels, because the truth is scarier than he’s willing to
admit.
 Diary
Chapter Summary

Link writes in his diary about his plans for the future with Rhett. Adult Link finds it.
Rated G.

I’d say Dear Diary, but that feels pretty girly, and Dear Journal feels so dang formal. It’s just a
spiral notebook. That’s all this is. I almost said that’s all you are, but you’re a spiral notebook. Not
a person.

Anyway.

Dear whatever.

Someday, I’m going to marry Rhett.

I know, it sounds really ridiculous and two boys probably can’t marry each other, but think about
it: we spend all of our free time together, and we laugh really, really hard together, and he knows
how to cook a little bit better than I do. I can make cereal and peanut butter and jelly sandwiches,
but Rhett can already make grilled cheese by himself.

I think we have to get married, right? Because I think if he married a girl, we wouldn’t get as much
time together and that’s just stupid.

We wouldn’t have to kiss or anything like husbands and wives do. I mean, unless they made us at
our wedding, but I’d probably kiss him if I had to to marry him.

Anyway, I had to tell somebody. And I think my mom would probably think it was weird or
something. So I figure I’ll just tell you.

-Link

P.S. is it weird to sign my name in my own journal?

P.P.S. maybe

Dear diary,

I just found this notebook behind the dresser in the attic in a bag. My mom was cleaning stuff up
and told me I needed to go get my things out of the attic, so I did, and I sat down and read it. You
know, that was the only actual journal entry I wrote in here before I used it to take notes. It was so
worn and scribbled over, I almost didn’t remember what it even was. Then I remembered what I’d
written.

Turns out I didn’t marry Rhett.

I hate to tell you, but even though it’s not literally illegal now, we didn’t get married. We married
wives. We have kids! Not together, of course. With our separate wives.
But here’s the funny thing.

We’re still together. I mean, not like that but... we’re still together. Now, we make millions of
people on the internet laugh as we eat animal testicles and gag. It’s a different kind of together, but
I think that’s what ten-year-old me wanted anyway. For us to be together, in some capacity or
another. And I think past me would want to know that present me is still hanging out with Rhett.
We’re still best friends. Sometimes, every once in a while, he even makes me a grilled cheese.
Mostly he makes beans in his instant pot and serves them over rice, and that’s alright too. I’m not
sure if I’m going to burn this notebook or show Rhett so we can have a good laugh over it, but I
just needed to say this. But like ten-year-old Link said, you’re not a person. You’re a spiral
notebook. So you’re not going to know what I’m telling you anyway.

Thanks, Diary, for helping me figure it out. Or at least for holding my math notes.

See you on the flip side,

Link

P.S. Still weird to sign my name in a diary.

P.P.S. Even if I was consciously doing it for the cinematic parallel. Cinematic? Not cinematic.
Whatever, it doesn’t matter. I was doing it for the parallel but it’s still weird.

Link

Oh. I did it again. Oops. Okay. I’m ending this now. No more signing my name.

Wait. One more thing. Yeah, we did kiss. And nobody even had to make us. Take that, ten-year-
old Link.
 Wired Like That
Chapter Summary

Some people could confess their love easily. Rhett wasn't wired like that. (Rated T)

Some people could separate work and love. They could work next to someone for years or
decades, same office, nearby cubicles, and not fall for the person they were spending time with.
Rhett wasn’t wired like that.

From the moment he laid eyes on Link Neal, all the way back in first grade, he knew they were
halves of a whole. So, every day since he tried to remind Link of that, in case Link forgot. And the
more he did, the more Link became tangled in his life. Two halves of a whole, really, just like he’d
thought when he was a kid. Now they were so entwined they were basically one, and Rhett
couldn’t help himself when it came to falling in love with him. Some people could separate
friendship and love. Rhett wasn’t wired like that.

Some people found it easy to confess their love, to sit someone down and say “hey, I love you. I’ve
been in love with you for decades.” The concept seemed simple enough. Just sit down. Just say the
words. But Rhett wasn’t wired like that. He couldn’t spit them out when he had the opportunity, so
he let the chances slide and kept pretending that wasn’t how he felt.

Some people knew when people liked them. Attraction, to them, was as obvious as the concept of
the sun rising or hearts beating, or whatever else seemed simple enough to understand. Link wasn’t
like that. He didn’t see people seeing anything in him.

Every time Rhett stared in the monitor, another person might have taken it as attraction, the looks
saying “I love you,” but Link wasn’t wired like that. To him, he just saw someone looking at their
best friend, making sure the footage was good for their show.

And when Rhett cleared his throat and started to speak and ended up on some tangent, some people
might have thought he was trying to say something, to confess feelings, but Link wasn’t wired like
that. To him, those conversations were Rhett falling down the rabbithole of layers and feelings and
thoughts.

Some lives, when twined together for forever, got together easily, without a lick of actual
communication about it, just falling into place and into kisses and into bed. But Rhett and Link
weren’t wired like that.
 Last One
Chapter Summary

The last thing Link wanted to talk about was Rhett's mom making fun of his accent
again. Rated G.

Link wrapped his arms around his legs and sat next to a gravestone in the cemetery he and Rhett
usually met in to hang out. He’d tried to go all the way home, but he’d been crying hard enough
that actually getting there was easier said than done. He buried his eyes against his knees, trying to
make himself stop crying, because his tears were the kind that had led to hiccups and he wanted to
calm down and bike.

He wasn’t sure why this hurt so much. She hadn’t said anything new. Still, his heart ached because
if she thought that, maybe Rhett did too, and the thought of Rhett thinking the same thing made
him sad. Link sniffled and squeezed his eyes shut, feeling the tears drip down his knees and down
his legs, angry and hurt and sad.

If he could only make it home, his mom could hug him, but he didn’t really want to go home.
What if her accent was the reason he had his? The last thing he wanted was this stupid North
Carolina accent and the stupid way he said words. He kicked at the ground and picked at the grass
with his fingers, still crying and still sad.

“Hey. I almost didn’t see you. Looked everywhere for you, man,” Rhett said.

Link jerked to attention, not aware that Rhett had even been approaching until he opened his
mouth. He sat down in front of Link, cross-legged and looking at him, and that made Link feel
even worse. He swiped at his tears and tried to make it less obvious he’d been crying. “Why?”

“Because I was worried. You left real suddenly and I wasn’t sure why.” Rhett picked at his lip and
ducked his head and Link looked away because he could still feel the tear tracks on his cheeks.

“I’m fine. Just needed to go home.”

“So why didn’t you? This ain’t home.”

Stupid Link, stupid excuse that Rhett couldn’t believe. He felt even worse now, standing up and
grabbing his bike. “I have to go home now.”

Rhett scrambled to his feet and grabbed his wrist. “Why’re you upset? Talk to me. I’m your best
friend!”

Link pondered and then turned to look at him. “I hate the way I talk. You hate it too. You just
don’t tell me you hate it.” He pulled away, yanking his arm out of Rhett’s grip.

“I don’t hate the way you talk!” Rhett insisted. “Why would I hate that?”

“Your mom does. Your dad does. Cole does. Your whole family thinks I sound like a darn
redneck!” Link argued, tears starting to flow again as he turned around and grabbed his bike,
kicking at the kickstand as tears fell to the dirt at his feet. As long as Rhett didn’t see him cry, that
was the important thing.

But Rhett grabbed him again, this time from behind, wrapping his arms around Link tightly. “I
think you talk just fine, Link,” Rhett told him.

“You do?” Link wriggled in his hug. Hugging was weird. Rhett was being weird.

“Yeah, brother. I think you talk fine. I like it!”

Link turned around and gave him a quick hug back before pulling away. “Thanks.” He swiped at
his snot with his sleeve and looked around them. He wasn’t sure he actually believed Rhett, but the
comfort was nice.

“Let’s go check out the pasture.”

Link was okay with that. A change of subject was a whole lot better than a hug. He smiled at Rhett
and threw one leg over his bike. Even if Rhett was lying, he seemed pretty darn sincere. “Last one
to the cows is a rotten egg!” He yelled over his shoulder, taking off, wheel spinning in the dirt at
first before he could shove off and ride to the street. Rhett caught up with him, throwing a glance
his way and passing him, and for the rest of the day, Link barely even thought about Rhett’s mom
mocking his accent. Yeah, he had a good best friend after all.

That night, when Link got home, his mom had dinner on the table. “How was Rhett?”

“Good,” Link said, shoving the triangle end of a grilled cheese sandwich in his mouth.

“Good?” She asked. “Diane called and said you left pretty suddenly today.”

“Yeah. Rhett found me after and we went to the pasture. I don’t want to talk about it.”

Link’s mom scanned his face, head cocked to one side. Link knew she knew there was something
she wasn’t saying, but she didn’t push. She never pushed. “Alright. If you do, tell me.”

“Thanks. Hey mom? Rhett’s a pretty darn good friend, don’t you think?”

She smiled and reached her hand across to take his hand and give it a squeeze. “Yes, Link, I think
so.”

Link didn’t think so. He knew so.

 Whole
Chapter Summary

Rhett's heart broke when Link did or said little things. Rated G.

Rhett looked at the monitor at Link, and suddenly, his heart ached.

He listened to Link clarify, “to wives. To our own separate wives,” at the end of a sentence where
Rhett said they were married, and suddenly, his heart broke.

He made a joke about how they had their kids from those separate wives, and that they hadn’t had
any progeny together, and heard Link add, “and we aren’t trying to,” and his heart shattered.

Rhett watched as Link lifted a strawberry to his lips, feeding him, and he opened his mouth and
took it, flicking his tongue over the end of the strawberry and biting down, eyes on Link’s, and his
heart fluttered.

He studied Link in the monitor and Link caught him, flashing him a subtle smile that everyone else
in the room missed, but Rhett saw, and his heart lifted.

He sat down in the recliner in their loft and heard Link’s footsteps coming up the ladder to sit
beside him. “Hey man,” Link said. “Love you.” And Rhett’s heart felt whole.
 Inappropriate Attire
Chapter Summary

Rhett's got a new shirt reading GAY HUMPS and Link isn't sure he quite understands
why that's a problem.

Rated T.

Link frowned at the shirt Rhett was wearing. "You're joking, right?"

Rhett looked down. "What?"

"You are not wearing that to dinner with my mother. Are you kidding me?"

Rhett laughed. "Dude, it's just a shirt. She'd take it better than my parents would!" The shirt
prominently featured Gaylord the Camel with the caption GAY HUMPS.

"It says 'Gay Humps!' People talk about us enough, man. I can't believe you right now."

"Dude. It's a joke." Rhett rolled his eyes.

Link shook his head. "Yeah. Okay. A joke."

"If you want me to take it off that badly, take it off of me."

"No!" Link yelped.

"Then I'm wearing it." Rhett crossed his arms, a look of challenge in his eyes.

"Please, Rhett..." He stepped closer, reaching out and touching the hem of the shirt. "Don't wear
this." He bit his lip, considering. could he take it off of Rhett? Not with a straight face. He blushed
intensely, sliding it off of him and tossing it on the ground.

"Damn. Guess I better find something else to wear, then."

Link forced himself to look away until Rhett put on another shirt. "You can still wear that one, um,
in our room? Just not like... near her." Mostly because he knew the implication and he knew how
his mother would take that implication. They'd always been close, always seen a little too much of
each other, but Link wondered if Rhett realized how accurate that shirt felt to Link's dreams.
Probably not, but his mother would, and that was exactly the problem. Rhett laughed and Link
questioned if he felt his silent terrified feelings about this whole situation. Did he know? Maybe he
knew and was teasing.

He thought about that until a shirt smacked him in the side of the face. "Guess that means you don't
want to wear the matching one I got you."

Link blushed. If he survived freshman year considering this shirt nonsense, it would be a freakin'
miracle.
---

Rhett didn’t know how else to get through to Link. If Link hadn’t gotten the hint this time, he
wasn’t sure he ever would. He’d done just about everything to make it clear and... no luck. “I can’t
believe you hate my shirt, man.”

“I don’t hate the shirts,” Link said. “I just... don’t think you are considering how they’ll be
perceived.”

Rhett glanced up at him. “Or maybe I’m considering how they’ll be perceived and wearing it
because of that.”

“What are you saying?”

“I’m not saying anything. I’m asking. Do you want to be perceived the way I want to be
perceived?”

---

There was Rhett, talking in circles. Does Link want to be perceived how he wants to be perceived?
What did that even mean? He looked at Rhett. “If I wear that shirt, people are gonna think I’m gay.
If I wear that shirt and you wear that shirt, people are going to think we’re together.” Link was
going to spell it out for Rhett if Rhett wasn’t willing to spell it out himself. Maybe Rhett
really didn’t get it.

“Yeah, Link. Exactly.” He held up his shirt. “This is my shirt. I know what it means. So, do you
want your shirt, or do you not want your shirt?”

Link studied the shirt, holding it up, looking it over. They’d been together a long time -- not like
that -- and Link figured they’d be together for a long time to come -- not like that. Maybe like that?
Maybe like that. He tugged the shirt on over his head. “Yeah, Rhett. I want the shirt.” He studied
himself in the mirror. “We’re still not wearing them to lunch with my mother.”

“Okay, Link. We won’t wear them to lunch with your mother.”

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