Dear father,

There is something I want to tell you; it’s been in my mind for a while now. I have prayed to
make things clear about an issue but at some corner of my heart, I wished that this moment
should never come between you and me. But this is for the best of our family. Before I even
start, I need to tell you that as a family we have always respected you above anything in this
world. Especially to me you were my Hero. I once wrote something about you
“My father has been a great support to me in my every step that I took, he guided me and told
me not to worry because the ocean is too deep to swim, if you don't believe in yourself you can’t.
But he believed in me and held faith told me he'll swim along with me supporting me till he sees
me standing on the shore. He became a lamp in the dark, an arc in the storms and an anchor that
I can hold on to. I love you so much DAD for everything that you are doing for me and baring with
me.❤”

I wrote that with love and genuine feeling towards you and it has brought me great joy.
Because we had a healthy relationship with each other.

This is my relationship with you.

From this point, It is going to be a serious talk, please don’t exaggerate it. It’s just normal
family talk. (Take hold and harden your heart)

Do you believe and do you think ? do you hold the same relationship with your daughter ?
I’m just asking to ask yourself this question.
Are you, your daughter’s hero ? I believe you certainly are. But what about the relationship?

YES, we are talking this out. It’s high time we do. Its already too late.

AND YES WE NEED TO MAKE AMENDS IN THE FAMILY

As a brother and a son I’m here to represent you few things which need to be dealt with,
For a better US, A better family.

Every person in this world goes through puberty. it not only brings change in physical body
but also mental behaviour changes, this is the stage where a child’s intellectual ability come
to grow where he/she will start to develop a nature called decision making skills.

And your daughter clearly lacks it. Because of the innate nature of our family, Which hinders
her to be mentally stable. I’m not telling that you are parental standards were bad but there
weren’t up to the mark.

As a person coming from a place where there is no proper awareness of society and social
education you should know how hard it is to survive in the outside word.

Exposure to the outside world plays a major role in a persons mentality and personality
development. Due to lack of that a lot of people suffer from a problem called as anxiety,
exaggerate, social anxiety, unable to interact with people around you, fear of being judged
by people, most importantly LOW SELF-ESTEME, self-confidence.
I believe of all the people you are aware of this and to my best knowledge you have faced
this problem too.
I have come across a book in your books collection “ 365 steps to self-confidence” by David
Lawrence Preston, why do you have this ? why does a person has this? Because he surely
lack self-confidence.

As your children, according to the law of nature we come to bore this traits of yours. This is
nothing wrong and we are not judging you about this, it’s just the creation of God.

But not able to change/adapt to a better personality is defiantly the hindrance of the
family regulations. They need to change before it’s too late.

Do you know how hard it was for me since the day I was granted freedom from this hell-
whole so called house arrest. Yes, I have always considered it as a hell. It all started from our
ancestors, A trait which most of the south Indian parents have called as “An orthodox
personality” sophisticated nature of narrow mindedness. I will now explain it to you, my
mother was over possessive about her children and was afraid of anything happening to us.
So to protect us she made you the Villain( in a good way for a good cause). She scared us by
your name for everything she believed would bring us harm. She used your name as a
weapon against us. Cannot blame her its again the fault of the family traits. She was afraid
where by any chance anything would go wrong with her children ( such as wrong doings of
the kids, hurts, wounds, complaints of naughty behaviour and a bad name to the family) the
whole family would go against her and torture her including you. Isn’t it the situation with
every wife of the society and household ? but the question is where have you been to
address this problem ? Yes we needed you long back but we were afraid to bring this up to
you. And we were afraid you wouldn’t understand this matter and this could lead to havoc
and misunderstand between us.

Due to such unhealthy relation. And growing up in that atmosphere it hindered our mental
growth and personality and had a greater impact on becoming worse. For a growing child’s
personality having a good self-image is really important but we had a negative self-image
about us, because of which we faced a lot of problems. We always thought less of ourselves.

Do you know? How hard it is to be out there in the world ? do you know how it feels to be
laughed at ? do you know how it feels to be unable to stand by yourself and defend oneself?
Do you know anxiety, exaggerate, social anxiety, unable to interact with people around you,
fear of being judged by people, most importantly LOW SELF-ESTEME & low self-confidence.
With such things in a person what he goes through ? let me tell you, this will lead a person
into depression
YES, I have been there. And trust me it’s the worst place to be in. and it’s beyond any
tragedy to be In depression. Which will eventually make you believe that you are not good
for anything and which in turn will lead to suicide, Yes I have tried committing suicide There
times back in 10th grade because of depression. Cause; ?? what else could be ? it’s Just the
family. how I’ve grown up, due to lack of good personality unable to take things and unable
to process situations. People laughed at me in school because I was house arrested, I
wanted to die by the grace of god I didn’t, I ran away from home. After I came back home
And ever since then, I got freedom and I thought it’s the end of sadness in my life but there
beings a new chapter a new sadness in my life Called as “Not knowing how to survive in the
society”

DAD, do you know people used to call me GAY, back in my intermediate just because of my
broken personality. I didn’t know how to be like a man I was still a 6 year old in the age of 18
year old college guy. You must have not understood and much not be a big deal to you let
me tell you in a way you understand. how does it feels to be called A KOJA ? Yes I was called
that way by my college mates. That’s what they refer to call me

I have gone through many more things it’s just one of them.

Even to till this day I’m learning how to be a better person and life is doing a great job in
teaching me

Even In my degree, in IBS I have faced a lot of problems and a lot of things I have mentioned
few to you before. What is the use of a person having knowledge and good marks and
certificates when he doesn’t know how to present it, does not know how to communicate ?
social interaction and self-esteem is really important in life and it needs to be developed
every day.

Now what do you think your daughter is going through in life ? do you think the thought of
suicide has never crossed her mind ? because her situation is much more worse than mine
was. And worse than you could ever imagine. Because it has always been me seeing her up
close.

Do you know her personality is so messed up that she can’t even make choices in life ?
Even decisions of her own? Let me enlighten you.
Have you ever wonder ? whenever you ask her what do you need ? she ends up replying
“anything you like” not because she wants you to get what you like it’s because she is not
capable of making her own decision and she doesn’t not know what she wants. She is fickle
minded.

Today I had an encounter with your daughter, I was trying to get through her psychological
mind before that let me tell you something when a person sees through another person and
tells them about themselves, in other words when your personal psychological things are
being showed to you by another, you feel lost and damaged and then end up getting
messed and results in tears *cry*. That’s what happened when I spoke to her about her
decision makings skills being very poor and will result in a bad life experience.

And even In school she is afraid of talking to teachers she doesn’t even ask doubts in
subjects because she is afraid of social world afraid of society.
She doesn’t even have much friend. Even if she has to go to toilets she takes along a friend,
not because it’s a girls thing. it’s because she is afraid. “Anxiety” mother of destruction in
peoples mind.
She is in a very bad shape we need to make a call before it’s too late. She needs emotional
and mental support.

Just imagine you daughter is of age now. She is pursuing BIPC, soon MBBS by god’s grace.
How do you think she will survive in MBBS ? do you know how things work in MBBS colleges
do you how ragging is done in professional colleges ? they ask juniors to get naked strip
down and scare them to go into mortuary. Yes its true
No, it not only happens in movies it also does in real life.

Dad you are elder to us, you have better experience than us but I can tell you as a 20 year
old guy I have exposure to things that you don’t I know things that you don’t I’ve been to
places and I know how certain things work. It’s not what you think it is, it’s not what you
think that the world is.
It’s a different generation it’s a different era. Things are not the same anymore.

How do you think your daughter will live as an adult in the world she is soon to entre ? she
has no idea what she is about to face, A Cruel world.
I’m sure she is going to get into depression much more worse than she is now. She needs to
grow and she needs a support, a shoulder to hold on to. I was there as much as I could. How
long do you think I can hold this ? hold her ? she needs you, she needs you as a Father. And
she deserves a father who could understand her and solve her every pain and problem.

We are going to lose her if we don’t take an action now. It’s too late already but it’s going
to be alright. I’m going to be by her side until you come back and I will keep protecting her.
Do not worry.

There are even more and many things I want to tell you but I cannot do this in writings and
documentation.

Bear this in mind I’m not asking for her freedom I’m not asking you to send her out like how
I do it’s not about she going out. It’s about she becoming a better person who she should
be.
As a family we have failed her (your daughter) but now it’s your turn, don’t fail her as a
father

You have been a wonderful father I have ever asked for. You are such a wonderful Dad I
could ever have. You took care of us more than we deserve. You sacrificed everything for
our better and well-being. but in this process you forgot about our mental health and state.
It was not your fault. And this can be corrected.

We will sit and discuss when you come back to India.

And father there is nothing to exaggerate and nothing to overthink this. Please don’t not
spoil your mood and mental health thinking about this. Because by worrying and
overthinking things won’t change.

And Most importantly my mother and sister are not aware of this Document and my
writings to you. It’s completely my own decision and Act
I don’t want to involve them both until you come back and sit with us and have a
conversation. And I hope I haven’t said anything wrong or rude to hurt you.
If so, I am extremely sorry. I hope you forgive me.

Please until you come back to India don’t mention or talk about this to your wife or
daughter
And especially me, I don’t know how to face you it took me so long to write this to you by
building courage. now I need some time to face you upfront. Let this be between us both.
Until the right time.

I HOPE YOU UNDERSTAND.

WE HAVE TO MAKE AMENDS

Please stand by this family and do the needful.

I PRAY EVERYDAY FOR A BETTER US.

I LOVE YOU DADDY.

I Have come across an article which talks about parents and children. please take the time
to read it in the next page below