Dodging Bullies

Is it okay if the logic shifts? []like it starts out less

shameless, I think?]
STEVE
Oh, the whole PTA is here. I
thought this was going to be an
internal thing. Okay.

Mrs. Terwin, Mr. Flanagan. Glad you

could come.
What up Johnny! They dragged you
in, too? You look good, though.
Man, I could get fired. I need this
job or my parents are going to kick
me out. But I mean what are they
going to do, hold you back from 6th
grade? I don’t think so. You’re
solid. All right, see you on the
other side.
Hi, Joel. So great you could come.
(tattletale. you were recording the
pickup game? Snake.

What’s that, Mrs. H? Time to start?

Thank you for inviting me to clear
the air. Most of you know me. I run
the computer lab.

I assume you’ve all heard the audio

that little Joel Gabrielson
recorded on the court by my house.
I guess I see why people might be
upset with me: in hindsight, it
does seem like maybe Johnny Bishop
was bullying him a little.
Did I have a burden of care? Hard
to say. I was off work, working on
my shot. It’s not like I wanted to
play with little kids, but there’s
only one good hoop.
In life, one thing kind of slips
into another, you know? It’s
analog. I prefer my computers.
Yes, Johnny is 3 years older than
Joel. And yes, he was calling him a
 2.

STEVE
hairy little piggy. But, it’s not
like it was totally inaccurate, and
we were shooting hoops, you know?
It’s sort of in the vernacular to
razz one other. A gentleman doesn’t
tell tales. All’s fair...?
Maybe I laughed and said oink,
oink. If that’s what’s on the tape,
then that must be what happened.
But...I don’t know...there’s a
certain trust on the playground, an
honesty...I don’t want to say a
state of nature... I mean, Joel,
come on, if people don’t respect us
enough to point out our flaws, how
will we improve?
Not that being fat is a flaw. I’m
not saying that. It can be an
advantage on the court. I get
pushed around by big guys all the
time, and believe, most of them are
not in good shape. Look at Shaq--I
mean, he was maybe the most
dominant center ever, and I
wouldn’t call him skinny.
This is all beside the point. It
looks bad, sure, but when was I
supposed to say something? When am
I supposed to go from dude playing
hoops to narc?
I already have to button up for the
classroom, and I do because it’s
important, but it’s exhausting.
What, now I’m responsible on my off
hours, too? Don’t you people ever
get tired? I’m just trying to live
my life.
Okay, yes, I was getting to the
punching. Ma’am, have you ever
played basketball? It’s a rough
sport. Like, just because it’s not
football, some people seem to think
it’s no big deal, ..

Joel’s not a dirty player per se.

Like I think he knows he’d suffer
if tried to hurt someone, but he is
a cheater and crybaby.
 3.

There’s an honor code. So if you’re

going to call foul when someone
barely touched you, then I’m just
going to foul you harder... I
assume that’s what Johnny was
thinking...unless it was some sort
of will to power thing, in which
case, you know, yikes, but also,
respect...and like, are we adults
really going to change things?

Like, people are who they are.

Nobody really changes.
So did Johnny punch him on top of
the head when he went for a layup?
I mean, that’s what Joel said, and,
there was probably contact, but
that’s b-ball. He’ll learn.
He cried for a few minutes. Johnny
said some stuff to him that I
didn’t hear because I was
practicing my shot again, and we
restarted.
Next possession, I take a solid
charge. But crybaby Joel isn’t
having it, threatens to tell his
mom I said "oink."
And you know what...it’s not a big
deal, so I give it to him. He
missed his foul shots anyway.

And I thought, you know, he’s not

going to learn anything this way.
So the next time he comes in for a
shot, I block it and it comes down
on his face and gives him a bloody
nose.
And maybe I was a little heated, so
I said, that’s what you get,
baby. Because he was objectively
being a crybaby. But I guess I
shouldn’t have said it. So I’m
sorry, Joel.
But also, be less annoying, and you
won’t get bullied as much.
How old am I? I don’t see how
that’s relevant. I’m 29.
4.