July 7, 2016 Thursday

Today Mrs. Izzy and I had a meeting with a couple that Mrs. Izzy has been mentored by
throughout her life. The meeting was centered on how one might begin a home bible
study. I’ve had a growing desire to teach and equip the saints for life in godliness ever
since I was redeemed by Jesus in 2013. I’ve had an unusual amount of time available to
dedicate to study compared to many lay people, for that I am very grateful, and am
looking to impart as much as I can to the body of Christ someday.

What is interesting about this couple is they started out as a home church and eventually
outgrew their home. They are currently pastoring a local Foursquare church. Now, we
went in there to discuss advice on how to prepare to start a home bible study. I didn’t
realize until then that it may not make sense as to why I am not simply working through a
local church to begin this teaching venture. I wasn’t about to express my views on plural
marriage, so I ended up discussing with them our stance on marriage licenses and how we
have reason to believe that the local church we attend, Calvary Chapel, will ostracize us
for that belief; as they likely would consider us fornicators because of other Calvary
Chapels that have said as much. This was a real concern, but an even grander and more
motivating factor for bypassing my local church is my passion for the biblical marriages
the modern church stigmatizes and rejects. I will not compromise my teachings and let
the deception continue as I sit around with the weight of wanting to do my part in
continuing the reformation rest on my shoulders. This is related to a topic I started about
starting a local group of some sort that is poly-friendly. Check it out and let me know
what you think: {Link: “How to start a local group?”}

The Pastor and his wife were actually very gracious in dealing with my fringe perspective
of marriage without a license and went out of their way to let us know that we would
even be welcome to teach with their church. Something they said in response to our
marriage without a license that reminds me of why I want to be outspoken in my attempt
to continue the reformation: “We are aware that marriage is a covenant, but cults will try
to abuse that and start marrying more than one woman. So be careful.” They then
continued to relate it to the FLDS polygamy they’ve seen on Sister Wives. Lord, help us
strip these lies and this fallacious thinking from our contemporaries. “We are destroying
speculations and every lofty thing raised up against the knowledge of God, and we are
taking every thought captive to the obedience of Christ,” 2 Cor. 10:5

The last thing I’ll mention about our meeting is that I feel as though I may be able to
reason with them and push them to reconsider their views on polygyny. It may take more
relationship building with them and a strong game plan, but they seem generous enough
to hear us out. I wonder how egalitarians like themselves might handle some of the
biblical data in support of polygyny. If anyone has something to say on that matter,
please see my other topic: {Link: How does an egalitarian interact with pro poly?}

After our meeting we went to the college group Rose invited us to. It was a 50s style ice
cream party for evangelistic purposes. It was quite fun and we met a number of lovely
young adults for the first time. I really enjoyed spending time with Rose’s son. I love this
little guy. Let’s give him a name: Drew. Interacting with Drew has made me that much
more eager to have a little blessing like him of my own.

To get to my next segment, there needs to be some background once again. So, as I’ve
mentioned before, Rose likes to build friendships with guys that seem to be an attempt to
fill the gap that her husband has left. Well, she recently began hanging out with this guy
at the college group for long periods of time. Keep in mind, Rose is a stay at home mom
without an involved husband. She has a lot of time to socialize if she so chooses. So for
about a month they’ve been talking for hours on end as often as she can. I won’t get into
the details, but this guy knew from the get go she was married because she was very
straightforward about the nature of a friendship she was interested in. She made it clear
she had no intentions of being anything more than friends and told him to tell her if she
made him uncomfortable at any point.

So, we are in the middle of fellowship when Rose goes outside to talk to “the guy”
privately because he has been ignoring her for the last week and she is a straightforward
gal. Long story short, he ends up being either a jerk or a very confused individual. Trying
to show him grace here since I don’t know the guy, but something was wrong. Because of
some more history of Rose’s, which I won’t get into here, she has some self-esteem
issues. So for reasons undisclosed, this guy rejects her as a friend and she is pretty shaken
up by it. She comes to the parking lot to meet with Mrs. Izzy and I, and we can tell she is
upset and trying to hide it. We sit in the parking lot for awhile discussing with her what
happened. This brings up a reoccurring discussion we’ve all had with each other, and I’m
curious as to what everyone here thinks. Here is the topic, which involves more details,
I’ve made on it: {Link: “Can you be married and have friends of the opposite sex?”}
After working through that and consoling her as best we can she begins to wind down
again. We have more great conversation that brings up things I wish to ponder more on;
she has quite an amazing mind and she wields it well. One thing we talked about that I’d
like more feedback on is what the nature of attraction is. Please see my topic: {Link:
“What is Attraction?”} for more on that. I’d love for people to join the discussion.

After a few hours in the parking lot we head over to the local Denny’s once more. During
our visit there Rose inquired about what the bible says about giving someone the benefit
of the doubt as it relates to some assumptions that the guy from before had been making.
She recalls that there was a verse that was explicit about that point, but none of us could
remember nor find it in the scriptures. If anyone could help us here please see my topic:
{Link: “Scripture on benefit of the doubt?”} Aside from that there wasn’t much more
discussion worth noting, but I would like to point out that Rose kept admiring my
relationship with Mrs. Izzy and kept expressing a desire for what we have. I was flattered,
but also saddened by this. It reminded me of the neglect of her husband and how much I
want him to step up. It did stir in me a desire to fulfill her needs in a way I previously had
not, but I still refrain from letting that be my objective as Mrs. Izzy and I build a
relationship with her. As I got to know her more I began to care very deeply about her
and Drew. I truly want the best for this family, regardless of my involvement. Anyways,
we had a great time at Denny’s, but we noticed how late it was and Mrs. Izzy was getting
tired. Rose suggested we just crash at her place and enjoy more time together rather than
driving home so late. I got the feeling that she could really use friends right now with
these feelings of rejection. Mrs. Izzy and I thought it would be a great idea and we left
Denny’s promptly.

We arrive at Rose’s apartment and find out her dog, Charlotte, was sick and she needed
to bath her. While she was in the bathroom bathing her Mrs. Izzy and I got comfortable.
After a short while Rose asks me for help in the bathroom because she noticed blood on
Charlotte’s neck. She mentioned how she would normally ask her husband for help like
this. I experience more feelings of wanting to provide that for her as I help Charlotte and
console Rose. The rest of the night we all play with Charlotte and visit until we are too
tired. We wake up the next morning to a quick cup of coffee and a short goodbye. Mrs.
Izzy and I head home.

I’ll end once again with my thoughts and feelings thus far about Rose. I am now to the
point that I find myself attracted to Rose. Yes physically; I noticed right away she was
beautiful and her cute 50’s outfit she wore tonight highlighted that. More importantly, I
find her personality very attractive. We get along like old best friends and we feel very
comfortable with each other. I think what adds to this is that we are both very thoughtful
and love conversation with substance. This attraction is very enjoyable, but has me
wondering if this is or could be a problem. I’ve created a topic for more discussion on
this: {Link: “How do you know when attraction/desire has become lust?”} Lord, search
me and know me. Bring to light any sin in my heart that keeps me from your way. Teach
me how to love as you love, and teach me how to appropriately express that love.