NAME: ​Brianna Frederick

What Are Your Values?

Deciding What's Most Important in Life

How would you define your values?

Before you answer this question, you need to know what, in general, values are.

Your values are the things that you believe are important in the way you live and work.

They (should) determine your priorities, and, deep down, they're probably the measures
you use to tell if your life is turning out the way you want it to.

When the things that you do and the way you behave match your values, life is usually
good – you're satisfied and content. But when these don't align with your values, that's
when things feel... wrong. This can be a real source of unhappiness.

This is why making a conscious effort to identify your values is so important.

How Values Help You

Values exist, whether you recognize them or not. Life can be much easier when you
acknowledge your values – and when you make plans and decisions that honor them.

If you value family, but you have to work 70-hour weeks in your job, will you feel internal
stress and conflict? And if you don't value competition, and you work in a highly
competitive sales environment, are you likely to be satisfied with your job?

In these types of situations, understanding your values can really help. When you know
your own values, you can use them to make decisions about how to live your life, and
you can answer questions like these:

● What job should I pursue?

● Should I accept this promotion?
● Should I start my own business?
● Should I compromise, or be firm with my position?

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 ● Should I follow tradition, or travel down a new path?

So, take the time to understand the real priorities in your life, and you'll be able to
determine the best direction for you and your life goals!

Tip:

Values are usually fairly stable, yet they don't have strict limits or boundaries. Also, as
you move through life, your values may change. For example, when you start your
career, success – measured by money and status – might be a top priority. But after
you have a family, work-life balance may be what you value more.

As your definition of success changes, so do your values. This is why keeping in touch
with your values is a lifelong exercise. You should continuously revisit this, especially if
you start to feel unbalanced... and you can't quite figure out why.

As you go through the exercise below, bear in mind that values that were important in
the past may not be relevant now.

Defining Your Values

When you define your values, you discover what's truly important to you. A good way of
starting to do this is to look back on your life – to identify when you felt really good, and
really confident that you were making good choices.

Please answer the following questions: Steps 1 through 6

For this exercise, think of examples from your personal life:

Step 1: Identify the times when you were happiest (5 pts.)

● What were you doing?

o I was outside in nature at Falls Park in Sioux Falls, South Dakota during
winter at sunset. We were walking around the park (I was slipping a
number of times on the snow and ice), looking at the Christmas light show
and the falls as the sun was setting. The falls were partially frozen, but still
had water moving through it at a fast pace. It was about 12 degrees
outside, and I was bundled up in my winter coat, gloves, beanie, and
jeans.
● Were you with other people? Who?
o I was with my boyfriend Nathan, and there were a few other kind strangers
in the park. We helped an older couple that had fallen in the snow back to

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 their feet and joked about falling and sliding in the ice with them for a little
bit. These kind strangers also offered to take our pictures when we took
pictures for them.
● What other factors contributed to your happiness?
o I find God through a naturalistic lens, where every time I’m in nature, it’s
easier to see His beauty and creation. This brings me joy. Being able to
walk around and lightly exercise contributes to my happiness. Spending
this quality time with my boyfriend, being in my favorite season of winter,
having snow starting to fall, and Christmas lights everywhere in the park
made me ecstatic with joy. It seemed as if I was living in a dream.

Step 2: Identify the times when you were most proud (5 pts.)

● Why were you proud?

o I was extremely proud when I was asked to be first chair Trombone my
10​th​ grade year in the Victor Valley College Symphonic Band. I was in a
section full of band directors (who I assumed were all more talented than
me, as they’ve been playing their instruments for longer than I’ve been
alive at that point). I was able to keep up with the adults and play at the
upper end of my range for the instrument.
● Did other people share your pride? Who?
o My parents and my private tutor (who was the assistant director of this
college band) were both extremely proud of me. My grandmother was
ecstatic that she was able to listen to me play with such an incredible
group.
● What other factors contributed to your feelings of pride?
o The most important factor is that I was able to prove my old band director
wrong about my abilities. He refused to give me first chair in the high
school band because I’m not afraid to speak up and tell him when he’s
wrong. I wanted our band to be the best possible, and he always chose
his favorites for leadership positions. He made me feel inadequate as a
player, and so I decided to quit his band and join something so much
greater that year. I was the only one in my family who played music at the
college level (and continue to play with a similar group at APU, now the
president of it). I feel proud when people tell me I can’t do something and
I’m able to do it. I was told I’ll never get into nursing school at APU by my
former principle, and I proved him wrong. I was told I’ll never be a
musician, and I proved them wrong. I was told I’m worthless – and I’ve
found worth in what I do, continuing to prove them wrong.

Step 3: Identify the times when you were most fulfilled and satisfied (5 pts.)

● What need or desire was fulfilled?

o I was most fulfilled and satisfied when I have my life in “order”. My
apartment is clean, my to-do lists are slowly being crossed off, and I’m

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 accomplishing everything I need to do. I had a desire for orderliness,
tidiness, organization, and achieving different tasks. My top Clifton
Strengths Finder assessments had included Achiever as my #1 strength
all three times I’ve taken the assessment for different leadership classes.
Because my mind is oftentimes chaotic, when my environment is neat and
orderly, I feel as though I have a small handle on my life and can find rest
after that. A specific example is when I was a founding member of the
Apple Valley Legacy Trail Junior Board. I was able to organize and
delegate with my best friend from high school, a team of high schoolers
who wanted to turn a historical landmark of the city into an official
landmark or museum.
● How and why did the experience give your life meaning?
o I was able to make a completely organized board of students and adults,
give a speech to 1,000 potential donors at the annual “Steak Fry” event,
and represent my high school to the public. I felt important and valuable
on this board, and many members often commented on the ideas I would
contribute to the overall success of the future. I saw the value in what I
was doing, and the changes we were already making for the community.
● What other factors contributed to your feelings of fulfillment?
o Being able to see the seeds that we were sowing within a year timespan
fulfilled me. Hosting an assembly for the entire high school on the project
my best friend and I were working on and getting students excited about
this cause was fulfilling. The involvement and success of the team
ultimately contributed the most to my feelings of fulfillment.

Step 4: Determine your top values, based on your experiences of happiness,

pride, and fulfillment (5 pts.)

From the list below, ​highlight 10 of the personal values listed​ to help you identify
your top personal values.

Why is each experience truly important and memorable? Use the following list of
common personal values to help you get started – and ​aim for about 10 top values​.
(As you work through, you may find that some of these naturally combine. For instance,
if you value philanthropy, community, and generosity, you might say that service to
others is one of your top values.)

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Accountability Excellence Perfection
Accuracy Excitement Piety
Achievement Expertise Positivity
Adventurousness Exploration Practicality
Altruism Expressiveness Preparedness
Ambition Fairness Professionalism
Assertiveness Faith Prudence
Balance Family-orientedness Quality-orientation
Being the best Fidelity Reliability
Belonging Fitness Resourcefulness
Boldness Fluency Restraint
Calmness Focus Results-oriented
Carefulness Freedom Rigor
Challenge Fun Security
Cheerfulness Generosity Self-actualization
Clear-mindedness Goodness Self-control
Commitment Grace Selflessness
Community Growth Self-reliance
Compassion Happiness Sensitivity
Competitiveness Hard Work Serenity
Consistency Health Service
Contentment Helping Society Shrewdness
Continuous Improvement Holiness Simplicity
Contribution Honesty Soundness
Control Honor Speed
Cooperation Humility Spirituality
Correctness Independence Spontaneity
Courtesy Ingenuity Stability
Creativity Inner Harmony Strategic
Curiosity Inquisitiveness Strength
Decisiveness Insightfulness Structure
Democraticness Intelligence Success
Dependability Intellectual Status Support
Determination Intuition Teamwork
Devoutness Joy Temperance
Diligence Justice Thankfulness
Discipline Leadership Thoroughness
Discretion Legacy Thoughtfulness
Diversity Love Timeliness
Dynamism Loyalty Tolerance
Economy Making a difference Traditionalism
Effectiveness Mastery Trustworthiness
Efficiency Merit Truth-seeking
Elegance Obedience Understanding
Empathy Openness Uniqueness

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Enjoyment Order Unity
Enthusiasm Originality Usefulness
Equality Patriotism Vision
Vitality
Others not listed?
Authenticity​, ​vulnerability​.

Step 5: Prioritize your top values (5 pts.)

This step is probably the most difficult, because you'll have to look deep inside yourself.
It's also the most important step, because, when making a decision, you'll have to
choose between solutions that may satisfy different values. This is when you must know
which value is more important to you.

● Write down your top values, not in any particular order.

● Look at the first two values and ask yourself, "If I could satisfy only one of these,
which would I choose?" It might help to visualize a situation in which you would
have to make that choice. For example, if you compare the values of service and
stability, imagine that you must decide whether to sell your house and move to
another country to do valuable foreign aid work, or keep your house and
volunteer to do charity work closer to home.
● Keep working through the list, by comparing each value with each other value,
until your list is in the correct order.

My top 10 values in order of importance to me (there are no right and wrong answers):

1. Authenticity 6. Reliability
2. Achievement 7. Leadership
3. Vision 8. Effectiveness
4. Vulnerability 9. Service
5. Structure 10. Consistency
Step 6: Reaffirm your values (5 pts.)

Check your top-priority values, and make sure they fit with your life and your vision for
yourself.

● Do these values make you feel good about yourself?

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 Yes, I’ve been able to narrow these top three values down the last three
o
years in different leadership classes for my minor. I know how important
each of these things are to me in a workplace, and I’ve discussed their
important with my bosses as well.
● Are you proud of your top three values?
o Yes. I take pride in authenticity and working with others that are able to be
open about themselves and men/women of integrity. I am proud of
achievement, because I am so task-oriented that achieving things is
incredibly important to me. Last but not least, I value vision highly. If there
is no vision that we are working towards, or a vision for the future, I find it
hard to find meaning in doing the tasks that are required of me.
● Would you be comfortable and proud to tell your values to people you respect
and admire?
o Yes, without hesitation. I believe there are three values that all people
should have on their list at some point, but it’s important to know how vital
these are to me.
● Do these values represent things you would support, even if your choice isn't
popular, and it puts you in the minority?
o Yes, being authentic to myself and what I’m doing would help determine
my choice in unfavorable situations. If I’m in the minority, I’ll still put my
best foot forward and listen to what others have to say. Achievement and
vision can often put me in the minority as well, but I’ll stand behind what I
value and believe. I can be convinced with a good argument; however, I
will always lean towards these things.

When you consider your values in decision making, you can be sure to keep your sense
of integrity and what you know is right, and approach decisions with confidence and
clarity. You'll also know that what you're doing is best for your current and future
happiness and satisfaction.

Making value-based choices may not always be easy. However, making a choice that
you know is right is a lot less difficult in the long run.

Key Points

Identifying and understanding your values is a challenging and important exercise. Your
values are a central part of who you are – and who you want to be. By becoming more
aware of these important factors in your life, you can use them as a guide to make the
best choice in any situation.

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Some of life's decisions are really about determining what you value most. When many
options seem reasonable, it's helpful and comforting to rely on your values – and use
them as a strong guiding force to point you in the right direction.
- See more at:
http://www.mindtools.com/pages/article/newTED_85.htm#sthash.XTGuXC5Q.dpuf

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