Robert Cialdini – The Power of Persuassion (Seminar) –

Notes
By SiNister

Questions
Question 1. If you have two options to present to a client, which should you
present first… the more costly or less costly?

Question 2. Is it better to tell prospects what they stand to gain if they move
in your direction or what they stand to lose if they don’t?

Question 3. If you have a new piece of information, when should you say
that it’s new, before or after you present this information?

Question 4. When you are presenting a product that has both strengths and
weaknesses, when should you present the weaknesses? Early or late in the
presentation.

Question 5. After someone has praised you, your product, or your

organization, what is the most effective thing you can do immediately after
you have said thank you?

• In the course of social interaction there are particular windows of

opportunity where if you know how to identify that moment and what
to fill that moment with, you will become significantly more effective.

• There is a moment of power immediately after someone has said

‘thank you.’

Question 6. If you would like someone to like you and cooperate with you,
what is the single most important thing you can do before you try to
influence that person.

THE 6 PRINCIPLES - 6 laws, principles, or basic rules of human behavior

that we could use to categorize and understand the motives that get people
to say yes to requests.

Principle 1 – Reciprocation

- I am obligated to give back the behavior that you have given to me.
- Everyone in every part of the world is taught reciprocation

- In the context of conversation, people tend to say yes to those they owe
something.

- It works because every society that trains its individuals to play by the rules
of reciprocal exchange gains an enormous competitive advantage.

o In a society with reciprocation, one member can call upon another for
resources (such as money, time, knowledge, help, etc..) and have the
other give it to them without giving them away since they can later call
upon others of that society that they have previously helped to return
those resources or for other resources.

 They will be more than willing to return those resources.

- You should master the art of exchange.

o Exchange is the factor that initiates relationships that create

partnerships, alliances, and allegiances.

o If you want to set the tone for the relationship that you want to
engender and cultivate, you act first.

 Your question when you go into a room where you want to be

influential is not “who can help me?” but “who can I help?,”
especially in a business way.

- It’s easy to mess this up. You fumble your Reciprocation influence when you:

o Get a thank and respond by saying something similar to “no problem,”

“any time,” “think nothing of it,” “would have done it for anyone,” and
so on.

 The “thank you” is a window of opportunity for you to gain

influence and be able to receive in return for what you have
given.

 You have to be willing to accept in return for what you have

given in the first place.

 What Cialdini recommends saying is something like “Oh sure, I

know that if the situation were reversed you’d do the same for
me.”

- This rule also applies to concessions made in business deals.

 o If you would like people to reciprocate a favor, you start with a larger
one, one people are likely to turn down and then retreat to the favor
you were going to ask all along.

o There is a window of opportunity when people say no to you.

 If you make 2 requests in a row, and the first one is declined,

yours second request will be viewed as a concession whereas if
that second request is asked at a later time, it will be a second
request and not a concession.

 In the context of a concession, people will want to reply and

reciprocate.

 Heuristic: If someone has said “no” to you, if you retreat from

the situation then you will lose, if you retreat “in” the situation
you will win.

Principle 2 – Scarcity

- Scarcity of Commodities

o When you present a product, a service, or a recommendation you need

to present to them what they are not be able to get unless they move
in your direction and accept the product.

 It is not sufficient to explain to them what they will gain.

• People are motivated more by what they will lose than by

what they will gain.

- Scarcity of Information

o When you get a new piece of information and it supports what you are
trying to argue with someone in terms of getting them onboard with
what you want, that information should be given to the other person
and let be known it is exclusive and new.

 The newer the information is, the more useful it is.

• The more exclusive knowledge is, the more power it

holds.

• Knowledge has great power when it is brand new.

Principle 3 – Authority

- “If an expert says it, it must be true” – The Dr. Effect

 - The most power type of authority is a credible authority that has both
knowledge and trustworthiness.

o This implies that you need to tell people about your knowledge and
trustworthiness before you get to know them and try to move them in
your direction.

 What can you do to let them know that you are knowledgeable
and trustworthy?

• Before you present your material, let them know about its
weaknesses and then right after, tell them that the
strengths overwhelm the weaknesses.

o This will establish you as a source of information:

knowledgeable about the pros and the cons, and
honest enough to bring the cons to the surface
yourself.

Principle 4 – Consistency

- Arrange for people not to just say “yes” or to nod or to smile, but to commit.

o The most powerful form of commitment is the written commitment.

 People live up to what they write down.

Principle 5 – Consensus

- “A lot of other people are doing this, it must be the right thing”

- Let it be known that other people are already doing what you want that
person(s) to do.

o This will show that the thing is popular.

o This ties in to the fact that people like to be led, let them know that
leaders have already taken the starting position and they are welcome
to follow.

Principle 6 – Liking

- “People prefer to say ‘yes’ to those they know and like”

- Factors that increase liking:

o Similarities

 We like those who are like us.

 o Compliments

 We like those who like us.

o Common Efforts

 We like those that work with us to achieve success.

Answers
A 1. If you would like people to reciprocate a favor, you start with a larger
one, one people are likely to turn down and then retreat to the favor you
were going to ask all along.

A 2. It is better to tell them that they will lose something if they don’t move
in your direction.

A 3. Information is more valuable the newer it is, it is better to say it as

soon as possible and make it be known that it is new.

A 4. Weaknesses should be presented right away and then strengths should

that overshadow the weaknesses should be presented right afterwards.

A 5. Arrange for people to commit to whatever it is they praise you for.

A 6. You can get people to like you through: Similarities, Compliments, and
Common Efforts.

Post Presentation Questions

1. Does this information work across cultures?

a. A study done suggests that all of these principles work in all cultures
but their priorities change throughout various cultures.

i. In the United States (a highly individualistic society), reciprocity

rules.

o Americans want to favors given to be returned to them.

ii. In China (a more collectivist society), authority rules.

o Chinese want benefits for their group (especially senior

members).
 iii. In Spain, the liking principle rules.

o Spanish want benefits for their social group, their friends.

iv. In the Mediterranean and Germany, Consistency rules.

o In the Mediterranean and Germany, consistency towards

a group is crucial.

2. What if you give but you never receive from a person?

a. Make them realize what you give to them is something they are NOT
entitled to but instead given as presents, when they say ‘thank you’ do
NOT say ‘no problem,’ this is your moment of power to ask for
something in return or to reciprocate the favor.

i. You can also respond with something similar to “Oh sure, I know
that if the situation were reversed you’d do the same for me.”

o This way, you don’t ask for something right away, instead
you reserve the right to ask for something later on.