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 POR£,WOR17
A s I write this foreword, Ninja Burger is exactly one year old. It was invented
in one of those spur-of-the-moment silliness sessions during which we (the
creators) were discussing how useful it would be to have a fast food delivery
service that could deliver inside a locked building. Out here in Silicon Valley, this is a
real issue, so we took it upon ourselves to flesh out the idea even further by creat-
ing the website (www.ninjaburger.com) for this imaginary restaurant.

Though it started out small, Ninja Burger quickly took off like an untethered pig
balloon at a Pink Floyd concert (except it had nothing to do with pigs, balloons or
rock music). What it did involve was ninja and fast food. And if there's one thing
everybody in the world knows and loves, it's ninja and fast food. Two things. Sorry.
The point being, as an astute Hollywood representative told us a few months ago,
Ninja Burger is "high concept." Meaning, it's something that everyone immediately
understands.

When you're growing up, you're given a steady dose of swordfights with sticks,
pseudo-karate chops on your friends and fast food hamburgers (hold tlie rehydrated
onion). And at some point, you're expected to give all that up and behave like a
sensible adult. Which is a true tragedy, as far as we're concerned, because no one
should ever have to give up something they love. Unless it involves gerbils. Because
that's just wrong.

And that's exactly why you now hold a copy of the Ninja Burger RPG in your hands
(the ninja thing, not the gerbil thing). Because aethereal FORGE and 9th Level
Games both agree that there is a time and place for acting like a responsible human
being, and there is a time and place for drinking beer, eating pizza and pretending
you're a ninja deliveryperson. The time for the latter is right now. We haven't
figured out the other part just yet.

At this point in its history, Ninja Burger has

been seen by over 100 thousand people,
across all 50 states and in 24 countries
around the world (and those are just the ones
who admit it). We're happy that you've
chosen to join our rapidly growing ciano
Please feel free to fill out an application,
polish your spatula, and get ready to kick
some Samurai oshiri. And most importantly,
be sure to tell your friends. Ninja Burger is
nothing without you, and with the rate at
which we lose ninja during delivery missions,
we need all the help we can get.

Domo Arigato.

-Michael 'Aeon' Fiegel

-
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" ~

..Prom:
To: Newly Appointed
Enli&htened
Ninja
Ninja
Bur&erTM Pranchisee-san
Bur&erTM Mana&ement
~ -s;; Welcome. honoraale Ninja Bur&erTM franchisee! You are

now an owner/operator of your own simulated Ninja

Bur&erTM delivery service. Ninja Bur&er: The Role- Flayin& Game
is in every respect a realistic and historically accurate
simulation of the actual Ninja Bur&erTM delivery ausiness.

The real Ninja Bur&erTM ausiness has very strict hirin& prac-
tices; it says ri&ht on the application that you must ae Ninja
to work for Ninja Bur&erTM. for Buddha's sake! (Actually, hiring guide-
lines do not demand that you be Ninja, but suggest that you be able to kill an opponent
with single bare-handedtechnique. See www.ninjaburger.comfor complete details.)

We realize that not everyone is lucky enou&h to have aeen aorn

into an honoraale Ninja clan and to have ae&un trainin& at
a&e five. Therefore. we (The Enli&htened Board of Ninja
Bur&erTM Masters) created Ninja Bur&er: the RFG (with the help
of some stupid &aijin &ame desi~ners from 9th Level Games) so
non-Ninja could experience the satisfaction of workin& for our
company. We. the enli&htened Ninja Masters at Ninja Bur&erTM,
sincerely hope that those of you not trained in the arts of
ninjutsu or aunjinkan will enjoy this simulation instead of
tryin& to work for us. since we are tired of havin~ to dispose
of your aodies.

As a Ninja Bur&er: the RFG owner/operator you have important

responsi8ilities. Pirst. you must find employees (often
referred to as players ay our &aijin &ame desi&ners). Next. you
must decide who will ae the Ninja Mana~er. The Ninja Mana&er
is in char&e of tellin& the employees what is happenin& in the
simulation as they work toward their oajecti ves. You will also
need to provide other mission-critical supplies like pens.
pencils. paper. six-sided dice and a conference taale (a kitchen
taale will do in a pinch). Our insipid &ame desi&ners su&&est
you offer sui taale snacks and aevera&es. such as aeer and pret-
zels (and wasaaiD. as part of your comprehensive employee
incentive pro&ram (as if the rewards of workin& for Ninja
Bur&er: the RFG were not enou&hD

Once the employees are assemaled. the Ninja Mana&er selected

and the supplies provided. everyone should &ather around the
conference/kitchen taale. create their Ninja and start makin&
deliveries (in 30 minutes or less. or you WILL commit Seppukuj~
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 AGILITY (A) -Is a gauge of how flexible, athletic and dexter- Handy CD Chart
ous your Ninja is. When you want to sneak, dodge, or melt AGILITY CD
into the shadows; you roll against AGILITY. It also determines 0-4 1
how difficult it is for others to strike you by governing your 5-9 2
Combat Dice (CD). CD indicates the number of dice others 10-14 3
need to roll to strike your Ninja. To determine your Ninja's 15-19 4
CD consult the Handy CD Chart. (See HOW TO KILL THINGS! 20-24 5
for more information on COMBAT DICE.) 25-29 6

KI (K) -Is a measure of the Ninja's intelligence, knowledge, self-control, and

centeredness with the very nature of the earth. KI determines how well you do at
mental feats like using Ninja Magic, or pondering the spiritual ramifications of Fries
of Our Ancestors. (See NINJA WUJENITSU! for more information on Ninja Magic.)

EXTRANEOUS (E) -Is a useless stat (or is it?) used for Handy MOVE Chart
things like daydreaming or repairing holes in your Ninja EXTRANEOUS MOVE
gear when it's torn apart by terrorist gunfire. When 0 1
you're doing something that has no bearing on killing 1-4 2
stuff, getting hurt or blowing things up, roll against 5-8 3
EXTRANEOUS. It also determines how fast your Ninja is 9-12 4
by governing their MOVE. Most Ninja Burger: the RPG 13-16 5
take place on a map with neat little square drawn in. 17-20 6
MOVE determines how many 5 foot squares a Ninja can 21-24 7
move in one action. (See THE TAKING OF ACTIONS! for more information on
MOVE.) To determine your Ninja's MOVE consult the Handy MOVE Chart.

Ninja SKILLS!
-A II Ninja are trained from the age of five in the twenty Arts of the Ninja.
These skills are areas of knowledge in which the Ninja Masters have deemed
all Ninja must be proficient. In fact, Ninja train so hard in these areas that
they are unable to perform any other action! If a player can't make a case that one
of these skills can explain their Ninja's action, the Ninja Manager should forbid the
player from attempting the action.

Each skill is governed by one of the four stats. When a Ninja wants to use a skill,
the Ninja Manager tells them how many dice to roll -the DIFFICUL1Y. Then the
Ninja tries to roll UNDER their stat using that number of d6 and adds them together,
if the result is less than the stat in question, the action is succeessfull.

All Ninja are particularly talented in four disciplines, and are said to have mastered
these skills. When creating your Ninja, roll 1d6 for each of the four attributes
(STRENGTH, AGILI1Y, KI, and EXTRANEOUS), and circle the skill listed under that
stat on the NERF. Congratulations, you are now a master of that skill! As there are
only 5 skills per category, if you roll a 6, you may pick any of the skills under that
stat to master. When a Ninja masters a skill, they receive a bonus die to all actions
involving that skill -the DIFFICUL1Y of performing those actions is reduced by 1 die.
If you are already a master of a particular skill (through your clan, for example) and
you roll for the same skill again you are an unlucky Ninja. There is no double
mastery and you may not choose a new one!

4-

-
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 HENSOJITSU -Masters of disguise, all Ninja are schooled in the various techniques
used in altering their physical appearance. The DIFFICULTY of the roll is deter-
mined by the Ninja Manager but should take two things into account: the person's
general familiarity with the person trying to be mimicked, and the appropriateness
of the situation. (You might think it's clever to disguise yourself as a copy machine
repairman, but anyone who works in an office will tell you that the odds of them
showing up at all, let alone on time, are next to nothing; in this case, the DIFFI-
CULTY to have your disguise believed would be high!)
KAYAKU-JUTSU -Ages ago, the honorable ancestors of the Ninja discovered
gunpowder and began to unravel its many uses. While Ninja are opposed to guns
and explosives as a general rule, their ability to function in the modern world would
be severely impaired if they weren't given a thorough instruction in their use.
SEISHIN TEKI KYOYO -A good deal of every Ninja's day is spent in silent media-
tion, where they reflect upon their ancestors and the trials and tribulations of
everyday life. This constant meditation has greatly increased their inner strength
and wisdom. The use of this skill allows a Ninja to pull a specific item out of one of
their numerous Ninja Pockets. The DIFFICULTY of this skill is equal to the number of
points the Ninja wants to modify his Ninja Pockets roll by. These points can be
used as the Ninja sees fit to increase or decrease either roll. (See Ninja Equipment
for more information on Ninja Pockets.)
Example: A Ninja could make a 3 dice SEISHIN TEKI KYOYO roll; after he succeeds
he can modify his rolls on the Ninja Pockets chart by up to 3 points.
WUJENITSU -'The most rigorous of all the Ninja training is without a doubt Ninja
Magic 101." (As reported by a survey done in an unnumbered issue of Ninja Weekly
on an undisclosed date by an undisclosed number of Ninja.) This skill allows the
Ninja to use any of the Ninja Magics. (See the Ninja WUJENITSU! section for more
information on Ninja Magic.)

EXTRANEOUS Skills
80 RYAKU -From a very young age Ninja are instructed in all aspects of warfare,
and in the playing of GO; this gives the Ninja knowledge of various strategies used
in all levels of warfare. When a Ninja attempts to take multiple actions in a single
turn, and then something happens that makes them want to stop, they have to
make a BO RYAKU roll in order to see the error in their battle plan. The DIFFI-
CULTY of the roll is equal to the number of actions that the Ninja attempted to take
that turn. (See the Rolling Dice Ceremony, for more information on The Taking of
Actions.)
CHIMON -Before beginning a mission, a Ninja will study all available maps and
schematics of the target area and the surrounding continent. Using this skill allows
the Ninja to find his way virtually anywhere in the world.

6
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 Clan of the Hidden Ranch -All members of the Clan of the Hidden Ranch are
masters of the INTONJITSU skill in addition to any other skills you may have
mastered, due to all of the sneakiness required in keeping the ranch hidden. Once
per game, a member of the Clan of the Hidden Ranch can automatically make an
INTONJITSU roll, regardless of its DIFFICULTY.

Keepers of the Secret Sauce -This secretive clan was charged by the ancient
Ninja Masters to keep the secret of making Ninja BurgerTM Sauce a secret. All
Keepers gain 1 KI from eating Ninja BurgerTM food. They also receive a bonus die to
any actions involving the killing of Samurai Burger employees, whose mission in life
is to steal the secret sauce.

House Gaijin -You are occidental instead of oriental, and may be French, Russian,
or Italian. You may even be Oil & Vinegar and as such do not mix well with other
Ninja. House Gaijin are barbarian giants who were either trained by half-mad Ninja
retirees (damn them!), or who found out in early life that they were the long-lost
descendents of a Ninja Clan. They gain 3 STRENGTH due to your their size, but
lose 3 AGILITY because they do not fit properly in the Ninja BurgerTM Uniform,

Lo Cal -You serve the secretive, despicable, tasteless, and incredibly weight loss-
conscious Warlord Lo Cal. Lo Cal has infiltrated the ranks of Ninja BurgerTM and the
other franchisees, in an attempt to destroy the entire burger-loving world, replacing
them with tofu, rice-cakes, and carbo-free energy boosting food substitute bars.
You receive +ld6 to EXTRANEOUS, and are a master of the HENSOJITSU skill.
Eating any Ninja BurgerTM products causes you to throw up and lose 1 HIT, Also,
you want to kill other Ninja (especially Blue Trees Ninja), and they will want to kill
you if they find out that you are Lo Cal,

Ninja WUJENITSU! (Ninja Magic)

, ~ art of every ~inja's training regimen is masteri~g the art of Ni~ja ~~JENITSU,
~ sometimes mistakenly referred to as Feng ShUI, or as the stupid gaijin say
"magic" or "combos". Special hand motions allow a Ninja to perform these
acts, Each time a Ninja uses WUJENITSU, they lose 1 point from their KI stat.

For the Ninja to successfully call upon his mystical energies the PLAYER must master
the use of the mystical Ninja Hand Kata. In other words, for the Ninja to produce
the effects listed with a particular WUJENITSU, the player, must make the hand
symbol listed with the WUJENITSU when she announces that her Ninja is
using the WUJENITSU, Failure to do so causes the WUJENITSU to
fizzle. Your Ninja loses the Ki but no effects are produced.

Ryukenjutsu (The Ninja Water Ball Trick) .

Effect: Ryukenjutsu produces a swirling ball of mystical water that erupts -'
from the Ninja's KI through their outstretched hands and flies towards .
their enemy in a straight line (rumors that this magical power actu-
ally consists of the Ninja throwing a super-sized lemon-lime soda.
are false). Anything that is touched by the water ball is immediately
made soaking wet, which ruins food, security systems, computers, and
quiet shoes. Any person hit by a water ball must make a 4 dice STRENGTH roll or

8
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 Ninja Pockets Chart

1 2 3 4 5 6

1 Snake Bag of Random Ninja Head- NBTM

Eyes! Caltrops Weapon Oil band Meal

2 Random Eggshell Medicinal Lock NBTM Id6

Weapon Grenade Herbs Pick Meal Shuriken

3 Lock Ninjal Eggshell NBTM Special Random

Pick Oil Grenade Meal Weapon

4 Id6 Special NBTM Eggshell Medicinal Disguise

Shuriken Meal Grenade Herbs Kit

5 Head- NBTM Id6 Random Eggshell Special

band Meal Shuriken Weapon Grenade

6 NBTM Disguise Special Bag of Id6 Eggshell

Meal Kit Caltrops Shuriken Grenade

ld6 Shuriken -See the Ninja Weapons! section.

Bag of Caltrops -Small, sharp 4-pronged metal jacks used to discourage pursuit.
The bag holds enough to cover one square. Anyone walking onto the caltrops loses
1 HIT per turn, any vehicle that crosses them gets Id6-2 flat tires.
Disguise Kit -A small pack that contains all the props a Ninja could ever need!
The kit can be used only once and reduces a HENSOJITSU roll by 2 dice in DIFFI-
CULTY.
Eggshell Grenade -A standard egg with its
original contents replaced by one of the follow- Egg Type (1d6)
ing concoctions. To use a grenade simply throw 1. Chicken -Your target has egg on
it at a target, make a SHURIKEN-JUTSU roll. their face (literally!) and so do you.
The DIFFICULTY is the targets COMBAT DICE or 2. Dragon (Flash) -All non-Ninja in
1, if the target is an inanimate object. Roll on the room are blinded for Id6 turns.
the Egg Type Chart to determine the grenade's 3. Peacock (Smoke) -All non-Ninja in
contents after the attack has been resolved. the room can't move without walking
H db d 0 the NInja
" " into something.
ea an -nce per game can
t t t"
d Ot (t k " th 4

.uc D

ang -non-
k (B )

InJa In e
All N """

th

en er a me I a Ive rance a Ing no 0 er room turn their head towards the

actions) t.o perform the headband tying cere- " grenade for 2 turns, looking for the
mony which takes 1 turn. After the ceremony IS cause of the noise.
complete the next Id6 actions the Ninja takes 5. Rotten (Gas) -All non-Ninja in the
are 1 die easier to accomplish. room must try to leave to avoid the
Lock Pick -A single-use, disposable Ninja lock smell.
pick. It can be used to reduce the DIFFICULTY 6. Snake (KO Powder) -Everyone
of a CHOHO roll by 2 dice. within the room must make a 3 "di~e
" M d "" I" H b A II "b aggle"" 0 f secre t STRENGn-I roll. Anyone who falls IS
" ~ Iclna er s -sma" knocked unconscious for Id6 turns.
Ninja "herbs" that can be applied to wounds to
heal Id6 HITS worth of damage. Ninja may not
gain more HITS than they started with by using the "medicinal" herbs, and it would
be dishonorable to attempt such a feat!

12
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GO! A Ninja can move about 3 feet per point of EXTRANEOUS. Ninja are masters
of swift action, and therefore always move at a maximum rate of speed. To simplify
things, if using an Official Ninja Burger: the RPG Map, (or any map with 5 foor
squares on it) a Ninja can move a certain number of squares per turn, as deter-
mined by the MOVE Stat.

DO! A Ninja can invoke a House Rule, scan their surroundings, or talk without
causing too much harm. These are all "free" actions, which a Ninja can perform
without increasing the DIFFICUL1Y of any other actions performed during this turn.
(See DO MORE! for more information on performing multiple actions in one turn.)

ATTACK! A Ninja can attack. Since killing things is a big part of the Ninja life-style,
combat is explained in the HOW TO KILL THINGS! section.
DIFFICULTY Chart
SKILL! A Ninja can use one of their skills. To use a skill, the 1 die Easy
Ninja tells the Ninja Master what skill they are using, and 2 dice Simple
respectfully asks for the DIFFICUL1Y. For some skills, the 3 dice Average
DIFFICUL1Y is listed with the skill, in other cases it is up to the 4 d!ce Hard
Ninja Master to decide the DIFFICUL1Y of the roll. 5 d~ce Tough
6 dice Crazy
VERSUS! In some situations, two Ninja have the honor of testing their prowess
against each other. In these cases, a Versus Roll is used to determine the victor. In
a Versus Roll, each participant rolls 3 dice, and subtracts the stat in question from
the result; the Ninja with the lowest score is the winner. Note: If the Ninja has
mastery of skill in question then they may reduce the number of dice rolled to 2.

Example: Tetsuo and Sujenji sit down to a classic staring contest, both combatants
take a moment to gather their energies then the test begins. The Ninja Manager
decides that this is a SEISHIN TEKI KYOYOcontest. To determine the winner both
Ninja roll 3d6 and subtract their KI. The Ninja with the lowest result is the victor.

DO MORE! If a Ninja wants to take more than one action in a turn, they can, by
adding a penalty die to each roll for every additional action taken. A penalty die
adds an additional die of DIFFICULTY to an action.

Example: Kenshiro is in a Samurai Burger Restaurant. He wants to dispatch the

stupid Samurai Burger Worker at the counter, sneak into the kitchen and cook a
small snack; for a grand total of 3 actions, which generates 2 penalty dice, as he is
taking 2 actions beyond the first. The Worker has 2 Combat Dice with the penalty
however, Kenshiro must make a 4 dice attack roll to strike the worker. The Ninja
Manager informs Kenshiro that sneaking into the kitchen is normally 3 dice SHINOBI
IRI roll, which increased to 5 dice because of the multiple actions. He also tells
Kenshiro that cooking a snack is only a 1 die MAKUDONARUDOroll; 3 dice after the
penalty is applied.

14
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 Example 2: Sujenji decides to throw shuriken at the Samurai Burger Night
Manager. The Manager has 3 CD. Sujenji has a 17 AGILnY, which controls
SHURIKEN- JUTSU. Sujenji needs to roll 3 dice (the DIFFICULTY from the Samurai
Managers 3 CD, and try to get under 17, his AGILnY. Since the shuriken are +fast,
+fast weapons Suenji can make up to 3 shuriken attacks without penalties for
taking multiple actions, but must still make three separate rolls to see if each hits.

Now that we know how to JUTSU, we get to determine how much damage (DAM) is
done. When a civilian, enemy or Ninja gets hit they subtract the DAM listed with
the weapon from their HITS.

Example: Tetsuo whacks an enraged Clerk that has 12 HITS with his spatula. A
spatula does 2 DAM. The Ninja Master reduces the Clerk's HITS to 10 (12 HITS -2
DAM).

When someone reaches 0 HITS, their souls pass on toward Nirvana (the place, not
the band). About the only thing that dead Ninja are good for is cordwood, which
explains why Ninja are tossed on bonfires instead of being buried.

J.lOAlORAMOAl~ Al.rAlJ AI
0 on't let the fact that they skulk around in the darkness and stab people in the
.:J back fool you... nothing is more important to a Ninja than honor, and the
...greatest honor, of course, is working for Ninja BurgerTM.

All Ninja start with 10 honor points (not coincidentally, they also start with 10
fingers). Anytime a Ninja does something dishonorable, she loses points of honor
and must make a Dishonor Check. Roll 2d6; if the total is less than or equal to her
current total number of honor points (and fingers), she passes. If the result is
greater than her current honor, she fails and must roll on the Ninja Unspeakable
Disgrace Chart.

Ninja Unspeakable Disgrace Chart (2d6)

2. Nobody was Looking -No one saw that. Just act like it never happened. You
don't get the honor point back, but guess what -you are now Snake Eyes!
3. Mistakenly Cast into the Chinese Hell of 10,000 Somethings -The grim
reaper wasn't paying too close attention, because you have been mistakenly cast
into one of the Chinese Hells. Feel free to make up any hell you like (Winds,
Mimes, Ghosts, etc.) because, as we all know, the Chinese have got a lot of hells!
4. Ninja Pride -Ninja are very proud. They celebrate this with black on black rain-
bows/ black triangles and unseen parades; very much like the one that just marched
by. You are knocked to the ground and trampled, taking 2d6 DAM.
S. Never Speak of This -To ensure that you never mention your disgraceful act,
you cut out your own tongue. Take 2 DAM, and for the duration of the game, if you
attempt to speak, you immediately lose another point of honor.
6. Beheaded -Bill, the Great Unseen Ninja Enforcer, shows up. WeIl, you assume
he showed up/ but you never saw him. He lops your head off. You die.

16
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 The HAIKU Rule
If your Ninja dies, and you would like to continue playing, you may compose a
Haiku about your poor dead Ninja. A Haiku is a simple poem, having three lines of
a set number of syllables, 5/7/5. The first line has five sylables, the second line has
seven, and the third line has five. If you recite your Haiku to the group, you may
make a new Ninja, and get back into the game.
Example: My Ninja Ry-U / He Was A Master of Stealth / Copy Toner Death

The HARI-KIRI Rule

Anyone prematurely (i. e. before the Ninja Manager has so ordered) attempting to
perform seppuku has, in fact, performed hari-kiri; a great dishonor to one's family,
clan and ancestors. If you commit hari-kiri then your next character suffers the
disgrace, starts out with only 7 points of honor, may only master the skill CHIMON,
and is named "Wang". If there is already a "Wang" in the game your Ninja is
named "Dong." Players of Asian descent who take exception to this rule may chose
to name their Ninja "Dick."

The HONORABLE RESPECT Rules

As previously stated, nothing is more important to a Ninja than honor, and respect
~ forms the foundation of honor. All Ninja and players must show proper respect at

all times. Failure to be respectful incurs a loss of honor. Some suggested rules of
< respect are listed below. However, Ninja Managers should feel free to create addi-
tional honorifics at will.

Footwear Honorific
The application of this rule is determined by the master of the dojo (the guy whose
house you're playing in). If so inclined, he or she can insist that all players remove
their shoes. Anyone wearing tabi boots is exempt from this rule. You assume all
risk to your olfactory senses by choosing to employ this rule.

Suffix Honorific
While playing Ninja BurgerTM, all Ninja and players must address each other by
name and with the honorific "-san" appended to the end. For example, saying,
"Hey Joe, will you get me a beer while you're up?" would be disrespectful and cause
a loss of honor. Likewise, just saying, "Grab me a beer while you're up" would also
be disrespectful. If you would like Joe-san to get you a beer while he's up, you
must address him properly. The suffix "-sama" is more honorific and usually used
for royalty or very favored things and "-kun" is used between friends. Please Note:
The "-san" appendage is only used when speaking of other people; any Ninja daring
to refer to himself in this way should immediately lose 1 point of honor.

The MY KUNG-FU IS BETTER Rule

A player may reduce the number of dice he is required to roll by one by screaming

l
"Ki-op!" "Hi-yah!" "Wooo-oo!" or any other suitable Saturday Afternoon Kung-Fu
Theatre sound effect, while standing at the table. Each time a player invokes this
rule, their "kung-fu" must be better than the last "Ki-op". If there is any doubt as to
whether or not it is actually better the Ninja Manager is the final judge. (Yes, we
know Kung-Fu is Chinese and Ninja are silent. Sue us.)

18
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7 Dumped the Cola -Oops! Maybe they won't notice if you just add more ice;
spend 1 action looking for ice.
S Cut the Cheese -The aromatic smell of the Ninja BurgerTM meal has attracted a
guard dog. The dog looks at the bag and begins to bark!
9 Torn Bag -Order dumps allover the floor; spend 1 action picking them up
10 Switcheroo -Somehow you ended up with a Samurai Burger bag; the horror!
Lose 1 point of honor immediately.
11 Missing in Action -Where'd that bag go?
12 Smashed Food -It's all squished and ruined; commit seppuku immediately!

~)(AMPL~ OP PLAY!
Ninja Manager (NM) -Rei-san you are in the bushes by the front door of the Tic-
Tack-Taco building. It's a glass door and as far as you can see there are no
windows on the first floor. Right inside the door you see a security guard. What do
you want to do?
Rei -I will use HENSOJITSU to disguise myself as a salesperson and walk into the
lobby.
NM -The HENSOJITSU roll is 3 dice, its average DIFFICULlY, 2 dice +1 die because
you are taking an additional action; disguising and moving.
Rei -Rolls 3 dice for HENSOJITSU and scores under her KI. I make the roll.
NM -You make a quick costume change in the bushes and walk through the front
door, past the guard, and right into a reception area. Kage-san it's your turn. You're
on the side of the building and there are no windows on the first floor, you do see
some on the secon'd floor.
Kage -I will scale the side of the building using TAI-JUTSU, sneak through a
window and hide, I think that's INTONJITSU.
NM -The windows are all closed.
Kage -OK Honorable Ninja Manager, then I'll jimmy it open with the CHOHO skill.
NM -The TAI-JUTSU climb roll and the CHOHO roll to jimmy the window are both
average DIFFICULlY 2 dice. The INTONJITSU hide roll is going to be hard, 3 dice.
However since you are taking 2 extra actions the DIFFICULlY of all rolls is increased
by 2. That means you must make a 4 dice TAI-JUTSU roll, a 4 dice CHOHO roll,
and a 5 dice INTONJITSU roll.
Kage -Did I happen to mention that I'm a master of TAI-JUTSU?
Rei -Foolish Kage-san has revieled a secret and should hang his head in shame!
NM -Rei's right, you lose 1 point of honor for violating the Secret House Rule in
revealing your mastery. On the plus side, it reduces your TAI-JUTSU roll to 3 dice.
Kage -Makes a Dishonor Check and passes. Rei-san you will suffer for that. OK,
I'm ready to start rolling. Rolls 3 dice for TAI-JUTSU and scores under his
STRENGTH, ro//s 4 dice for CHOHO and scores under his KI, ro//s 5 dice for INTON-
JITSU and scores much higher than his AGILITY. I failed the last roll.
NM -You easily scale the side of the building, you deftly jimmy open the window
and believe you have cunningly hidden yourself behind a small waste basket. The
man whose office you entered is looking in your general direction with a perplexed
look on his face. OK it's my turn. Rei-san, a woman, who is sitting behind a pile of
papers, smiles as you enter and asks if she can help you. There are 4 chairs in the
loby and there are 2 men already waiting. Kage-san, the man stands and begins to
back away from you, never taking his eyes off your general area. Rei-san, you're up.

20
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 AlZAlJA MAAlAt,£R 5£~TZ()AI!
Welcome to Ninja Managemnet
, f you're reading this section, you have been promoted to a great honor, Ninja
Manager. In Ninja Burger: the RPG, the Ninja Manager acts as the Game Master,
and so it is her responsibility to set up the game, create the delivery, run the
customers and enemies and generally try to kill as many Ninja as possible. This
section will detail how you can create a Delivery Destination, generate realistic
customers, and manage a group of feisty Ninja employees.

The Handbook of Ninja Resource Management!

r he first thing you need to learn is how to manage the chaos that we like to
refer to as "the game." Generally, the sequence of events is simple. The
Ninja tell you what they want to do each turn, and then, you describe what
happens. Sounds easy, huh? Whenever a Ninja performs an action it's up to the
Ninja Manager to describe the effect of that action.

The Ninja BurgerTM Mission Statement!

W hen playing Ninja Burger: the RPG, we encourage you and your employees
to make as much noise as possible, make complete asses of yourselves in
public, and generally make a mess.

The Ninja BurgerTM Franchise Binder!

U nlike the real Ninja BurgerTM Franchise Binder (whose rules must be followed
to the letter or people start losing limbs), these rules only exist so that you
can have fun playing games. Everything in this book should be fried, tried,
tasted, basted, roasted, broasted, toasted, eaten, beaten, mixed up, shook up,
thrown up, and served with an order of Fries of Our Ancestors! At the end of the
night, you and your friends are the ones playing the game. If you want to change
the rules -go ahead! You forked over the money for this game, and we aren't giving
it back!

Department of Intolerable Conditions of Employment

(DICE)
W henever a Ninja wants to perform an action, which requires training of some
sort (like picking a lock) or which has any chance of failure, the Ninja
Manager should have that Ninja make a dice roll. That's why Buddha
created these little oddly shaped plastic bits capable of generating random numbers.
The Ninja Manager will tell the Ninja what skill the Ninja must roll against and how
difficult the action is. The DIFFICULTY of the action determines how many dice the
Ninja must roll. The harder the action, the more dice required. To determine the
DIFFICULTY of an action, refer to the Handy DIFFICULTY chart. If anybody argues
with you (the Ninja Manager) over your decisions, have them lose a point of honor!

22
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Samurai Bushi -These mercenary dogs are hired by the Samurai to keep the
customers in line. They use swords and know how to fight, but are cowardly scum
that must be killed.

Samurai Night Manager -The Night Manager is a loud mouthed, stinky Samurai
Burger employee that has the (dis)honor of leading Migrant Workers through the
night shift. Night Managers can only advance to Daimyo level by bringing the head
of a Ninja to a Regional Meeting.

Samurai Franchise Daimyo -Franchise Daimyos feel that all Ninja are below
them and have no fear of lowly delivery Ninja. Franchise Daimyo are always
protected by ld6 Migrant Workers, who are willing to lay down their lives for their
master. Each has a tube of secret sauce that they keep hidden on their body. This
tube is worth beaucoup points with Ninja BurgerTM Management.

OTAI<U 8£UTM (Slogan: Make A Run For The Buddha!)

This southern Japanese fast-food franchise specializes in a nearly tasteless brand of
sushi wrapped in tortilla shells covered in three flavors of wasabi: Regular Hot,
Seppuku Hot, and Nagasaki Hot. The only reason that most people even eat OTAKU
BELL is the collectible prizes in their Super Depressed Anime Otaku Meals.

Otaku Wages lave -Otaku Wageslaves usually gave up promising careers in

online auctions trying to collect all of the useless junk from Otaku
Bell. Otaku Wageslaves are pimply, slimy, reek of fish, and strike'
fear into all that see their rotund shambling forms.
~
accounting and computer networking, due to the huge debts they racked up in

" r
'/"
~'1"""
"-'"

Otaku Fanboy Kensai -Fanboys don't actually work for the company, they just-
spend lots of time hanging out at the store trying to collect all the toys. Fanboys
hope to score cases of new toys by bringing back bags of tasty Ninja BurgerTM food,
preferably with a Ninja hand still attached.

TU£ L-O ~AL- ~L-AAJ

Lo Cal is an aging Warlord who is strictly against the frying of vegetables (it
destroys their natural flavor!) and is the owner of the largest fresh vegetable distri-
bution company in the world. His agents have infiltrated every corner of the world,
with the mission of eliminating all those who fry vegetables, to make way for his
Vegan Utopia.

Lo Cal Tong Fighter -Tong Fighters are not part of an Asian gang; they get that
name because they are really into salad. These tricky fighters are in great shape
thanks to high-fiber, low-fat diets, and are always looking to show off their Tai-Bo.

Lo Cal Vegan Tofu Zealot -The Tofu Zealot is on a mad mission to make it into
Lo Ca's inner circle, by bringing him evidence that a Ninja BurgerTM franchisee has
been destroyed. These madmen will stop at nothing (short of hurting animals, or
wearing fur) to put an end to meat eating and Ninja BurgerTM.

24
Customers -Customers are a specialized class of Enemy. Granted, Customers are
a necessary evil in the life of a Ninja, due to the fact that they pay the bills, but
Ninja still regard them as insignificant insects that occasionally need to be crushed.
However, a Customer is the party that actually ordered the Ninja BurgerTM food
delivery, and is protected by the ancient code of Ninja Honor. Ninja are NOT
ALLOWED TO KILL CUSTOMERS!!! If a Ninja does, they lose 2 points of honor.

Enemy Stats
Enemy S A K E Skill Goodie Weapon DAM
SB Migrant 6 6 7 4 MAKUDONARUDO Rickshaw Hat Spatula 2
SB Bushi 10 10 10 10 KEN PO-JUTSU Cash Katana 6
SB Manager 10 10 5 5 KEN PO-JUTSU Binders Katana 6
SF Daimyo 16 16 13 3 KEN PO-JUTSU Secret Sauce Katana 6
0 Wageslave 12 8 3 11 MAKUDONARUDO Otaku Prizes Chopsticks 2
0 Fanboy 4 6 18 18 WUJENITSU Otaku Prizes Hands 2
LC Tong 14 13 7 12 KUSARIGAMA Self Help Book Kusari-gama 5
LC Zealot 5 15 7 7 KYOJITSU Tofu Yari 7
HR Manager 13 5 2 15 SHINOBI IRI Office Supplies Letter-Opener 2
Security Guard 14 13 7 7 BO-JUTSU Security Diagram Nightstick 3
Guar,j Dog 10 10 3 3 TAI-JUTSU Nothing Fangs/Claws 3
Terrorist 14 14 14 5 KAYAKU-JUTSU Floor Plans Gun 6
Cab Driver 8 8 8 ¥ CHIMON Cab Gun 6
OOPS Driver* 20 12 10 7 TAI-JUTSU Packages Fangs/Claws 5
Office Cowboy 11 9 13 13 KAYAKU-JUTSU Office Supplies Gun 6
Street Vendor 9 9 9 9 INTONJITSU Kitchen Stuff Knife 3
Cubicle Jockey 5 5 5 5 None None Hands 2
Customer 3 3 3 12 +Ninja Vow Cash Hands 1
* May also use any Ninja WUJENITSU.

~)lAMPL-~ tJ~L-IV~RY
W hat follows is a sample delivery. It contains maps, descriptions of the
various areas, enemies & customers and some rules specific to this adven-
ture. Feel free to use or omit as much as you like. You will probably notice
that the descriptions of the areas are rather brief. This was done for two reasons,
the book was getting too long and we wanted to make the game a bit easier for an
inexperienced Ninja Manager's to run. If some annoying player wants his Ninja to
grab a fire extinguisher and makes a big stink about fire codes and building regula-
tions, you have the option of making it up yourself or saying "Sorry since it's not
listed in the room description it's not there." If he continues giving you a hard time,
point this section of the book out to him and ask him to read it for himself. Then
since he, a player, is reading from the Ninja Manager's section, you should feel no
compunction about making him lose 1 point of honor (See page 20)!

The italicized sections should not to be read aloud to the Ninja; they contain all the
enemy information, as well as, nasty little surprises you can spring on unsuspecting
Ninja.

26
 Ll
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-
" While in the air-ducts, all rolls are made at one additional die of DIFFICUL1Y.
~ ~ Ninja can enter the air-ducts from the roof at location X. Exiting the air ducts
requires a hole. A Ninja can make a 4 dice CHOHO roll to quietly cut a hole

"
or a 1 die attack roll to noisily exit the ducts. Jumping from the ground into
a hole in the ducts requires a 3 dice TAI-JUTSUroll.

On every turn spent in the crawl space, a Ninja must make a 2 dice SHINOBI
~ -' IRI roll in addition to any other actions. If they fail the roll they fall through
the ceiling tiles (unless flying).

On each turn, or partial turn, a Ninja spends in a fish tank they must make a
~ 2 dice SUIREN roll in addition to any other actions. If the Ninja fails the roll
'Y they take 2 DAM from drowning and are stuck in the fish tank --try again
next turn.

On the Ninja Manager's turn, sometimes things happen (roll or pick):

1 -Nothing
2 -Nothing
3 -A mailman arrives at reception and Mark G goes there to pick it up
~ 4 -An OOPS driver arrives at reception with a delivery and Heather N goes
'Y there to sign for it
5 -It's Sue's birthday and all the Bob's and Sue's go to the kitchenette for
FodTekKenTastee Kakee cake substitute
6 -A Samurai Burger Bushi enters reception with a delivery for the confer-

" ence room

Under normal circumstances, employees return to their starting position the

~ ~ following turn after being somewhere else.
Example: Mark G goes back to the mailroom the turn after he gets the mail.

If you insist on having a "winner," the first Ninja to complete their delivery,
and exit the building undetected wins. If you are also using secondary
~ missions, then the "winner" is the first Ninja to complete his delivery, as well
'Yas, his secondary mission, and exit undetected. Ninja lose a point of honor if
they fail to complete their delivery, or if they fail to complete their secondary
mission; two if they fail both.

Area Descriptions

1. Reception -Two large glass doors open into the Grand Foyer of the FodTekken
International building. When the doors open a mechanized voice greets you with
"Welcome to FodTekken, the makers of Fod, an all unnatural food replacement
product. FodTekken Almost Tasty!" A receptionist busies herself with a game of
computer solitaire, while a security guard seems to be fighting a losing battle
against sleep. There are 3 people waiting in the lobby. One is unmistakably garbed
in the cheep polyester twill of a traveling salesman. The other pair consists of an
aging gentleman of oriental descent and his young ward, who is none other than
Daniel-san, star of such movies as Karate Boy, Karate Boy 2, and Karate Boy 3D
and Karate Boy 5 The Return of Karate Boy!
Sue A, the receptionist S:3 A:3 K: 3 E: 12/ CD:1 / Stapler 1 DAM / No Skill
30

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7. Vice-president's Office -A man dressed in the very expensive Italian silk suit
of a vice-president appears to be working diligently at his computer. Upon closer
investigation, however, you realize he is actually playing Microfitsu Lynx 2001, the
latest addition to the computerized golfing arena, and he has just dishonored his
ancestors by bogeying the last hole!
Bob L, FodTek vice-president of TekKen 5:3 A:3 K:3 E:15/ CD:1 / Fist 2 DAM/
MAKUDONARUDO

8. Kitchenette -A well-sized kitchenette complete with a microwave and cabinets

chock-full of FodTekken imitation snacks. A woman is sitting at large white table
having a staring contest with a package of FodTekken Imitation Pretzels.
Carol R, an employee 5:3 A:3 K:3 E:12 / CD:1 / Fist 1 DAM/ No Skill

9. Cubicles -A group of Fodtekken employees all hard at work at their various

tasks, which range from day trading to sending online greeting cards to one
another. Occasionally, one of the guys calls all the other guys over to his screen,
and they all stand there ogling for a minute or two before one of the gals comes
over and they have to switch off the monitor or risk a sexual harassment suit.
Erik M, an employee 5:3 A:3 K:5 E:12 / CD:1 / Fist 1 DAM/ Spiffy Clothes
Heather N, an employee 5:3 A:3 K:3 E:12 / CD:1 / Fist 1 DAM/ No Skill
Mike 0, an employee 5:3 A:3 K:3 E:12/ CD:1 / Fist 1 DAM/ CHIMON
Viki P, an employee 5:3 A:3 K:3 E:12/ CD:1 / Fist 1 DAM/ 80 RYAKU
Big AI Q, an employee- 5:5 A:3 K:3 E:4 / CD:1 / Fist 1 DAM / +10 HITS

Crawl Space -Believe it or not this area is a very confined, very dark crawlspace.
Nobody up here but us Ninja!

E~ANCETRAININ6 .NEEDLEPOINT
..

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~';
32

--