A STUDY ON THE SELF ESTEEM AND COPING SKILLS OF

CHILDREN OF ALCOHOLIC PARENTS:

CHAPTER:1 INTRODUCTION
Children of alcoholics are at a significant risk for a variety of cognitive, emotional, and
behavioral problems when compared to peers who were not raised by alcoholic parents. Children
from parents who are addicted to substances are the group most at risk for later developing
problems with drugs and alcohol likely due to both genetics and environmental factors. Children
of addicted parents are also most likely to suffer child abuse and neglect, compounding existing
predisposition towards mental illness and substance abuse.
The family environment of alcoholics is typically marked by a significant degree of chaos.
Alcoholic families tend to be driven by a system of rigidity such as lack of flexibility and
arbitrary rules, that predispose children to develop a sense of overwhelm or confusion. this
response is marked by feelings of fear that remain unexpressed or unresolved, which can lead to
emotional shutting down and detachment from loved ones.
Children of alcoholics endure chronic and extreme levels of tension and stress as the result of
growing up In the home with a parent struggling with alcohol abuse. Very young children
may exhibit symptoms of:
 Separation anxiety
 Frequent nightmares
 Crying or problems with becoming unusually upset
Older children of alcoholics exhibit symptoms of:
 Depression [apathy, excessive guilt, feelings of hopelessness and helplessness]
 Obsessiveness [overly rigid, intense need for perfection, hoarding, isolation and
withdrawal excessive self consciousness]

Studies have shown that adult children of alcoholics are more likely to exhibit symptoms of
generalized anxiety disorder, panic disorder, agora phobia, dysthymia social dysfunction.
Children who grow up in homes with an alcoholic parent are more likely to experience episodes
of trauma neglect or abuse. Posttraumatic stress disorder are also higher in this population
compared to peers who don’t grow up in an alcoholic home. Children of alcoholics exhibit
higher rate of antisocial personality trite than what would be expected in the general population.
This findings is most significant for male children of alcoholic fathers.

Adult children of alcoholics are also more likely to abuse substances and are at significant risk
for developing problems associated with addiction to a substance. Male children of alcoholic
fathers are most at risk for developing later problems with substance abuse than are female
children of alcoholic fathers. One misconception that many people dealing with alcoholism have
is that their drinking is not affecting anyone else. Of course, that's not true, and children of
alcoholic parents can be among those most impacted. Unfortunately, the effects of growing up
around alcoholism are sometimes so profound that they last a lifetime, affecting the way kids-
turned-adults see themselves and others, interact in relationships, and more.

Parents struggling with alcoholism may be surprised or concerned after reading on about the
impact their addiction can have on their children now and through adulthood. Their kids,
however, may find relief knowing what may have contributed to some of the issues they may
face today.

Trust Issues

After growing up in an atmosphere where denial, lying, and keeping secrets may have been the
norm, adult children of alcoholics can develop serious trust problems. Broken promises of the
past tell them that trusting someone will backfire on them in the future.

As a result of trust issues or the lack of self-esteem, adult children of alcoholics will often
struggle with romantic relationships or avoid getting close to others. If a child's alcoholic parent
was mean or abusive when they were drunk, adult children can grow up with a fear of all angry
people. They may spend their lives avoiding conflict or confrontation of any kind, worrying that
it could turn violent.

Self-Judgment

Some adult children of alcoholics find it difficult to give themselves a break. If they had a
tumultuous upbringing, they often don't feel adequate when comparing themselves to others and
feel that they are never good enough. They may have little self-worth and low self-esteem and
can develop deep feelings of inadequacy.

Children of an alcoholic parent may find themselves thinking they are different from other
people and therefore not good enough. Consequently, they may avoid social situations, have
difficulty making friends, and isolate themselves as a result.

Many adult children of alcoholics take themselves very seriously and can be their own worst
critics, leading to anxiety, depression, and social isolation. It can often be difficult for an adult
child of an alcoholic to lighten up at social gatherings when they associate these events with
trauma, tension, or feelings of dread.

Approval-Seeking Behaviors

In addition to judging themselves too harshly, some adult children of alcoholics constantly seek
approval from others. They can become people-pleasers who are crushed if someone is not
happy with them and live in fear of any kind of criticism.
Perhaps to avoid criticism or the anger of their alcoholic parent, many children from alcoholic
homes become super responsible or perfectionists, and can become overachievers or
workaholics. On the other hand, it is not uncommon for a person to go in the opposite direction,
mirroring the same bad behaviors they may have witnessed during childhood.

If an alcoholic parent was emotionally or physically unavailable, the adult child can develop a
debilitating fear of abandonment and, as a result, hold on to toxic relationships just because they
don't want to be alone.

Need of the study

Growing up in a family with parental addiction has a lasting impact on children who are subject
to uncertainty, chaos and even violence. It is estimated that 26.8 million children in us are
exposed at varying degrees to alcoholism within their families. The problem of having an
alcoholic parents or parents is systemic in that it impacts children who are dependent on adults
for their care.

Children of alcoholics face a unique set of challenges because of the lack of stability at home.
The developmental tasks of childhood are thwarted by a need to survive the difficulties of living
in an environment of addiction. Children who grow up in a family with alcohol or drug addiction
are often exposed to acute and Chronic high levels of stress. They become hard-wired for danger
and respond with nature most adaptive fight, flight or freeze response. In fact, the child faces a
double hind in that due to dependence on the parent for care, he or she can neither fight nor flee.
The long term outcomes of having to navigate such a stressful environment as a child puts
children of alcoholics at a higher risk for depression, anxiety disorders

Relevance of the study

Alcoholism is a growing problem with society today and many people who suffer from it do not
even realize it. Alcoholism also known as alcohol dependence is a chronic, progressive disease
that affects millions of Indians. It can cause number of medical problems, violence in person, and
even death. An alcoholic is defined as a person who has problems from drinking but continues to
drink anyway. Problem of alcohol misuse hit the family like a tidal wave, leaving those involved
in a sea of anger, frustration, fear and isolation. This means children who are vulnerable to a host
of problems where alcohol diverts the parent’s attention from the child. When parental
judgement is impaired under the influence of alcohol, children are at risk of suffering both
intermittent and chronic neglect.

Alcohol consumption is the greatest risk factor for disease and disability in middle income
countries. Alcohol dependences is characterized by behavioral cognitive and physiological
symptoms including a strong desire to take the drug, difficulties in controlling its use, persisting
in its use despite harmful consequences a higher priority given to drug use than to other activities
and obligations, increased tolerance and sometimes a physical withdrawal state.
Children of alcoholics often have to deny their feelings of sadness, fear, and anger in order to
survive. Many adult children of alcoholics lose themselves in their relationship with others,
sometimes finding themselves attracted to alcoholics or other compulsive personality such as
work alcoholics who are emotionally unavailable.

Adult children may also form relationships with others who need their help or need to be rescued
to the extent of neglecting their own needs. If they place the focus on the over whelming needs
of someone else, they don't have to look at their own difficulties and shortcomings.

Often adult children of alcoholics will take on the characteristics of alcoholics even though they
are never picked up a drink: exhibiting denial, poor coping skills, poor problem solving and
forming dysfunctional relationship.