TUBERA, Krizha Anne L.

12HUMSS – 17
FF2 PETA

First Station: #reticent — not revealing one's thoughts or feelings readily.

- The time that I really felt that all are against me was this summer before Grade
12 started. I felt that I am worthless and cannot do everything that I want to do in
life since I have a lot of time to think because I only stayed at home during
summer. I felt as if everyone judges me in everything that I do. I chose reticent as
my hashtag since I’m not that kind of person who reveals her thoughts to anyone.
I barely open making it worse since I cannot share it to anyone. I was afraid to
open up to anyone even my family.

Second Station: #vicissitude — a change of circumstances or fortune, typically one

that is unwelcome or unpleasant.
- Since it’s summer, I have more time to realize and to process my thoughts. I
wasn’t ready for anything vicissitude, but it was already there and I should just
learn to cope with it. Everynight, or rather morning at 4 o’ clock in the morning, I
still stare at the ceiling thinking if I am worth it, am I not enough? Things like that
came to my mind and it became my bedtime stories; founding myself crying into
sleep. I admit that there came I time that I was beyond stressed and depressed.
But these thoughts actually made my persepctive more clearer and made me
mature as an individual.

Third Station: #cornucopia — great source of something

- My family became my cornucopia. Even though I’m not willing to share away my
thoughts. I can feel that they were there to support me and knew that I’m not
feeling better. My little sister became my pillow, I literally hug her everynight to
feel some sense of comfort since night time was usually the enemy: it made me
realize more things in life and made me question things.

Fourth Station: #seventh heaven — state of extreme joy

- My partner, or rather bestfriend in life was my seventh heaven. He gave me so

much comfort and made me feel loved. Whenever I’m with him, I immediately
forgot all of my problems and felt peace from my thoughts even just for a
moment. He always help me to process my thoughts, make me feel at ease, and
made sure to remind me that I will be always and always be loved. He always
make sure that when he leaves to go home, he’ll leave me with a smile on my
face. I know that from the bottom of my heart, he will always and be always my
seventh heaven; my greatest source of comfort and joy.

Fifth Station: #axiomatic — obviously true

- It’s obviously true that the thing that I need to sacrifice is to lessen to think
thoughts like these and to stop hating myself, because I know that at the end of
 the day I only got myself and no one can ever help me except for myself only. I
need to get rid of these thoughts and make sure to be optimistic in life always.
Deep down, I will always know that life is wonderful and filled with so much hope.
Hope is the certain thing that I always clung to.

Sixth Station: #nirvana — state of perfect happiness and peace

- This experience made me grow as an individual. It made my perspectiv ein lofe
so much clearer and helped me to be more mature. I thought I was being mature,
but I didn’t expect that I can be more mature than that. This experience made me
a better version of myself, I became more of a calm person and I was less
impulsive. I must say that it was a journey that made me the person that I am
today, but the journey doesn’t end here. It’s still the beginning to achieve my
ideal nirvana.