Ashley Alba

HEAL 223

Midterm: Student Development Theory Autobiography

Autobiographies are intended to discuss our personal life story and how we became the

individual we are today. Autobiographies also reflect major events in our life that influence our

personal, adolescent and/or college development. Each individual have their very own personal

story background. Our personal development can be driven by our upbringing, outside

influences, role models, significant life events and more. This paper will discuss my very own

personal development experiences and relate it to the literature we have discussed in class thus

far.

I first want to begin from the very beginning of my life, starting from the womb. I was

not supposed to make it out into this world. Doctors advised my mom to abort me because I was

going to be a baby with disabilities or possibly not make it out alive. The reason why they

suggested abortion was because my mom was unaware to be pregnant with me and had involved

herself with taking a drug that could have possibly harmed me. My mom went against the

doctor’s orders and proceeded with the pregnancy. Fast forward to present day I am a healthy

thirty year old woman, working full time, in grad school, with a husband and two kids. My mom

has always told me I was born a fighter and I truly believe that. I was never a follower my entire

life and I always fought for what I believed to be right. From our classroom literature we learned

about Erikson’s Identity Development Theory. From the theory there are four stages that begin in

early childhood, begins from early childhood development into early adolescence (Patton et al.,

2016).
 I can relate to stage one and two. Stage one is basic trust versus mistrust where children

develop and maintain trust levels and learn the process of reciprocity from family and caregivers

(Patton et al., 2016). Stage two is autonomy versus shame and doubt, children explore their

environments and rely on encouragement from caretakers to help them build confidence (Patton

et al., 2016). Stage one is present in my childhood with believing and confining to my mom. I

believe and trust her when she tells me I am a fighter. The words my mom gives me as a child, I

trust them and lead me to where I am today. She has always told me to have respect for myself

and for others, also to “go to school all the way.” Those were her exact words to me growing up.

Stage two involves the encouragement and building of confidence for caregivers. I strongly fall

under this stage because if it wasn’t for my mom giving me the words, wisdom and

encouragement as a child, my confidence would not be what it is today. My confidence is strong

enough to not take any nonsense or mistreatment from anyone. To stand up for what is right, is

something my mom always told me to do. Again if it wasn’t for my mom instilling these

influences and words onto me, not sure what person I would be today.

I was raised in a single parent household, I relied solely on my mom and my grandmother

who lived with us. Growing up in a single parent household is another influence factor in my

personal development. It has taught me to be an independent woman and not to rely on anyone

other than myself. In chapter one of Patton we learned about the ecology models under Urie

Bronfenbrenner. The model consists of four levels that have influenced my student development

theory. Being raised in a single parent home I believe this influence falls under the exosystem,

which is the third level. I will go in depth on how the Urie Bronfenbrenner theory reflects my

personal and student development.

 As I mentioned one of his ecology models explains the process of series that

includes four levels of context that have influence in our student development theory. Those four

levels include the person whom is the center, surrounded by the microsystem, mesosystem,

exosystem, and macrosystem (Patton, 2016). Microsystems are patterns of activities, life roles,

and interpersonal relationships experiences by the developing individual. Mesosystems are the

connections between two or more settings, for example work and home setting. Exosystem are

based on environmental influences that can shape the development process. Lastly macrosystem

is known to be the broadest level of context (Patton, 2016).

My mesosystem and microsystem factors that influence my student identity development

involved my college courses, instructors, guidance counselors, high school friends, college

friends and working part time at The Bulldog Shop. These factors I listed highly influenced my

student development. Before entering college my high school friends and I would discuss life

after high school at times. It would never go any deeper than just simply stating where we would

want to go for college or what career we wish to study. The guidance counselors at my high

school weren’t very helpful. They didn’t explore with me the many options of colleges, all I

knew was Fresno State. Especially being the first to go to college, I did not know anything about

college seeking, applications, financial aid etc. When I started my first year of college I would

counselors often not knowing exactly what I wanted to study. My mom is such an influence on

me that I decided to pursue a career in journalism. Growing up my mom worked at KMPH Fox

26 in Fresno, CA. I always admired and looked up to her. I decided to follow in those footsteps

and pursue a career in broadcast journalism.

Other surrounding factors that were impactful during my college years of developing my

student identity was when I began my internship at ABC 30 Fresno, CA. It was so impactful in a
negative way and it happened towards the end of my degree. During my internship and even in

my last semester of college I was told finding a job in this field is very hard. Also that I would

have to leave to a small TV market to start my career. Hearing that when you are about to

graduate with the degree that people are telling you you won’t find a job with it, was very

devastating. I felt as if I studied the wrong degree I pursued, I wasted time and effort. When I

graduated I moved in with my boyfriend who is now my husband and became pregnant. So I was

definitely not able to relocate to pursue a career in journalism. I felt very lost at the time and

defeated. Throughout my pregnancy I continued to try and find a job in TV that was either part

time or full time. I did not give up looking for employment. I ended up working for an Autism

center working as a behavioral technician for learning arts. I did not enjoy it but it gave me a

check and maternity leave/pay. Which is something I was also looking for to secure myself and

my child. That is when I knew I can only tolerate the child I am about to have and not others. My

personality taught me I cannot be around children. Five months after I had my son I was hired as

a staff member at Fresno State. This is where my life changed for the better, doing what I do now

and how it lead me to HEAL. During my college years I also worked as a student assistant and

loved it. Being back for almost six years has been the greatest opportunity. Life has its own way

of working out for us.

As for exosystem there were external forces that influenced my student identity that were

living in a single parent home, furloughs, financial aid polices and being a first generation

college student. I discussed living in a single parent home impact at the beginning of this paper. I

will discuss the other factors and the reasons why they are in my exosystem category. Furloughs

were a part of my college experience. In my eyes at the time they were good because classes

were cancelled but being aware and wiser now, I see they were very hurtful. Hurtful to staff,
faculty and the entire university. Employees were being laid off, classes were being cancelled or

some individuals had to come to work without pay. Financial aid was something I relied on

heavily during college. It was my outlet to buy books, school supplies and help my family out in

some ways. Towards the end of my college year my financial aid fund would be reduced or I

would receive it late. I may have possibly exhausted my efforts, since it took me five years to

graduate. It is hard to experience that especially when college is taking longer that you expected,

that is out of your control.

As a first generation college student it was difficult navigating the whole college “thing.”

I am the first to go to college in my family. Being that I am the first, it was very hard to figure

the college system out. I had to resort to friends that were already in college, especially when

financial aid documents or the application was due. I would also go to them to navigate the

student portal by enrolling for classes, resources and who was my assigned counselor. My

friends assisted me through the college process, rather than the college I attended. The first year

was very difficult for me.

Events that occurred during my college experience can reflect under the environmental

influence of the macrosystem in the theory. The event of the killing of Osama bin Laden, I had

mentioned furloughs and the impact on the university, and we had the first African American

president during my college years. The killing of Osama bin Laden didn’t have much of an

impact on me during my college years, I think due to being young. Being young and in my first

year of college, important events or politics unfortunately do not matter. Again furloughs were

rough on staff and the university. As for me I thought the cancellation of classes was a time for

me to take a beat. But it wasn’t the same response to everyone else. Our first African American

president occurred when I was in college. I had voted for President Obama and it was my first
time voting. I will never forget the first time I voted and knowing it was a historical event that I

participated in. All of these factors had an impact on my college student identity development.

Another theory that greatly resonated with me is the Torres’s Bicultural Orientation

Model and Influences on Latino Identity. Torres focus has been on the identity development of

Hispanic college students. She believes that there are three influences during the student’s first

year of college, first is environment where the student grew up, second the family influence and

generational status and thirdly self-perception and status in society (Patton, 2016). I can apply

the third influence within my student development. From the readings under the third influence

two possible outcomes can signal change in the student’s ethnic identity: conflict with the culture

or a shift in relationships within the environment (Patton, 2016). Both positive and negative

changes can result from these outcomes too.

I fit into the third because I have had conflict with my culture or within my own family

members stating that I am not Mexican enough. I have been called white washed in the past and

even by coworkers to this day. Everyone in my family and my associates, state that I am not

Mexican enough. In their eyes I do not fit in the traditional cultural customs or norms of being a

Mexican. Growing up my family wasn’t huge on Mexican customs, we participated in

celebrations, holidays, mass and play Mexican music from time to time. But we were never that

big obvious Mexican family. Now that I am an adult my family sees that I am my own person

that fits into the woman, wife or mother I have chosen to become. I did not have a quinceanera

only because I told my mom no, I knew she did not have the money to do so. But others

perceived me as being snotty. It can be difficult and uneasy having to explain myself. I say I am

Mexican American firmly but I do not fit your traditional Mexican American. It can be
exhausting having to think and rethink yourself. I am at the point where I am happy where I am

at and this is who I am.

This leads me into the third theory that also stood out to me in regards to my student

identity development. Jean Phinney is a theorist that believes there are three stages a college

student can experience during their developmental process. I believe I am in stage one, but

possibly between stage one and two. Stage one states unexamined ethnic identity (diffusion-

foreclosure) which individuals have not explored feelings or attitudes regarding their ethnic

identity (Patton, 2016). Also show a disinterest in their ethnicity. Although I have experienced

feelings toward my ethic identity, they were negative experiences which have led me to lose

interest in my ethnicity. I have lost interest with my ethnicity and positive engagement within it.

Although I have lost interest, I continue to state I my ethnicity because that is the only thing that

ties me to it. But the practices of being Hispanic aren’t really there for me.

Stage two is ethnic identity search/moratorium where students can deal with

discrimination face to face encounters, harassment or perceived less than by their dominate

culture group (Patton, 2016). I know who I am and where I belong but I am not an exception to

my dominant culture group and again for that I have lost interest in finding my ethnicity roots.

Upbringings, life experiences, educational journey and even tragedy can direct the process of the

student development theory. Bronfenbrenner chart explains how life events shape our student

identity. Any change of signals can influence our student development. We also learn of the

negative and positive outcomes that can influence our thought process.

My entire life influences brought me to where I am at today. I currently work in higher

education in accounting services, specifically Dream, Nursing and Perkins Loan office. The

values my mom and grandmother instilled in me come about in my adulthood. From my

upbringing I also learned to be nonjudgmental of others. My mom has always taught me to be

kind for we don’t know a person’s story. With each student I meet, I must be respectful of them

for the following reasons I was once an undergrad student myself, unaware of what they’ve been

through and the practice of being nonjudgmental. I am not aware of their story, successes or

struggles as I too have my own. I have dealt with students that have been misled or mistreated.

My role is to advocate for those students and create a better environment for them. Some are first

year students and I can highly relate to that specific group. I truly believe that if you have walked

in an individual’s shoes, you can relate. I immediately relate to first generation students and try

to apply the best experience for them.

In my current work I strive to advocate for the students and uplift those that may feel lost

and without a voice. Again I want to leave a positive impact on students, this is the reason why I

do this work. I enjoy helping and advocating for students. As I mentioned what guides my work

in student affairs is my upbringing and personal values. My personal values will always impact

any form of work I do. I always plan to operate my work on being fair and unbiased towards

students. As well as offer everyone a chance at being a student they wish to be. It is hard when

obstacles are thrown their way and may become discourage. But life is about obstacles and as a

staff member on campus we want to strive that their fall outs will not define them.

My life story has never been an exciting one to write about nor does it consists of

multiple impactful events. It is hard to write of myself because I don’t always have much to say

and I don’t like talking about myself. In present day the only interesting fact about me is the

multiple roles I have. I try to do what I can and strive for the best in anything I do. Today I am a

mother, wife, full time employee and grad student. I am a woman with many titles. My

upbringing taught me a lot of what I know now. It also is a big influence on the person I am
today. I am a mother to a six year old and 1 year old that require much of my attention. Learning

to have a lot of balance is a requirement in my life. Also at this time we are facing a worldwide

crisis of the coronavirus epidemic. Currently it has impacted me by classes going virtual and

locking the department down where I work. I am only receiving emails and calls. I have never

experienced anything such as this but this is my continuing path of my life influences. Five years

from now I will reflect on what has transpired and influences that contributed to the person I

have become. I strongly believe HEAL will be an influence factor.

 References

Patton, L. D., Renn, K. A., Guido, F. M., & Quaye, S. J. (2016). Student development in college:

Theory, research, and practice. Retrieved from https://ebookcentral.proquest.com