To: Nancy Myers

From: Kassidy Carlton

Date: April 15, 2021
Subject: APLED 121-Chapter 5 – Achieving Audience Involvement

Chapter 5
ACHIEVING AUDIENCE INVOLEMENT
1. Revise the following by adding pronouns and names.
a. The company will require further information before processing this request.

We will need further information before being able to process your request.

b. It has been decided that a new procedure must be implemented to avoid further
mechanical failures.

We have decided that a new procedure should be implemented, so we can avoid further
mechanical failure.

c. The department supervisor wants to extend heartfelt thanks for the fine efforts
expended.

Our department supervisor wants to extend her heartfelt thanks for the fine efforts you
expended.

d. I think you have done a great job. I want you to know that you have surpassed this
month’s quota by 12 percent. I believe I can speak for the entire department by saying
thank you.

I think you have done a great job Ben. I want you to know that you have surpassed this month's quota
by 12 percent. I believe I speak for everyone in the department by saying thank you.

e. If this computer overloads, simultaneously press Reset and Control. Wait for the screen
command. If it reads “Data Recovered,” continue operations. If it reads “I/O Error,” call
the computer resource center.

If this computer overloads, you simultaneously press Reset and Control. Then you must wait for
the screen commands. If it reads “Data Recovered,” you may continue operations. If it reads
“I/O Error,” call the computer resource center.

2. Revise the following using positive words and pronouns.

a. We cannot lay your cable until you sign the attached wavier.
We will be able to lay your cable once you sign the attached wavier.

b. John, don’t purchase the wrong program. If we continue to keep inefficient records, our
customers will continue to complain.

John, make sure to purchase the right program. When the records are sufficiently kept our
customers will be happy.

c. You have not paid your bill yet. Failure to do so might result in termination of services.

Make sure you pay your bill, in order to continue your services.

d. If you incorrectly quote and paraphrase, you will receive an F on the assignment.

If you correctly quote and paraphrase, you will receive a good grade.

e. Your team has lost 6 of their last 12 games.

Your team has won six of their last twelve games.