Professional Documents
Culture Documents
Everyone’s experience of grief or emotionally and many people say that Looking after yourself after
loss is unique. You might experience they function on ‘auto’ for a while just
to get through.
a significant loss
all kinds of difficult and at times
Grief is something that takes time to
overwhelming emotions, and you Grief can affect your thinking; leaving
work through. While everyone finds
might sometimes wonder if the you unable to concentrate or make
their own way to grieve it is important
sadness will ever end. This is a decisions, forgetful and sometimes
to have the support of friends and
normal reaction to loss. causing you to worry that you will
family or someone else, and to talk
never feel better. It can also cause
about your loss when you need to.
There is no right or wrong way to difficulty in your sleeping and physical
grieve but it can help to allow yourself to health, leading to headaches, nausea, Allow yourself to grieve and heal
grieve, share your grief, and let others aches and pains. It is not unusual to
also question your faith or beliefs at • Grieve your way. No one can tell you
support you. In time you will learn to live
this time as you search for answers how to feel.
with your loss, heal and move forward in
new and different ways. and meaning following the loss. • Understand that grief takes time.
Expect that you will sometimes
The way you are feeling and thinking
find yourself surprised by how
What are grief and loss? affects how you interact with the
you are feeling.
world around you; your friends, family
Grief is a natural response to loss. and workplace. For some, being with • Express how you feel to someone
It might be the loss of a loved one, others is comforting while others you trust. Talk using words that
relationship, miscarriage, pet, job or prefer more solitude as they come are comfortable and have meaning
way of life. Other experiences of loss to terms with their loss. to you and don’t be afraid to share
may be due to children leaving home, your emotions; your tears, anger,
infertility and separation from friends Grief has no set pattern. Everyone relief etc.
and family. The more significant the experiences grief differently and there
are cultural and circumstantial factors • Honour your loss. It might be by
loss, the more intense the grief is
that affect how people express and writing a journal of memories,
likely to be.
cope with it. Some people may grieve writing letters, treasuring precious
Grief is expressed in many ways for weeks and months, while others possessions, planting a tree,
and it can affect every part of your may describe their grief lasting for writing a song; whatever feels
life; your emotions, thoughts and years. Through the process of grief, meaningful to you.
behaviour, beliefs, physical health, however, you begin to create new • Be prepared for difficult events
your sense of self and identity, and experiences and habits that work that trigger your memories and
your relationships with others. around your loss. You slowly begin to sadness. This may happen on
Grief can leave you feeling sad, angry, experience a greater sense of hope; anniversaries, birthdays, reunions
anxious, shocked, regretful, relieved, focusing more on the future rather or perhaps when you see particular
overwhelmed, isolated, irritable or than the loss itself. In time memories reminders of what you have lost.
numb. Many of these reactions are begin to become something to enjoy
• Take one step at a time. Know that
not constant but instead can come rather than triggering sadness.
there will be setbacks but that you
in waves; often triggered by memories will heal in time.
or occasions. The first few days after
a loss are particularly intense
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How family and friends Provide ongoing support • Encourage them to get help if their
grief does not seem to be easing
can help • Understand that life may never
over time, particularly if they have
feel the same. They may learn to
Many people do not know what to say accept the loss and the pain may suicidal thoughts, self-harm or
or do when trying to comfort someone lessen, but the sadness may never appear to be giving up on life.
who is grieving. However, often it is completely go away. • Look after yourself. Helping a
the simple offer of love and support grieving person can be a heavy
that is the most important. • Let them know it’s OK to share their
grief. They are not alone. burden. Take care of your own
physical and emotional health,
What to say • Ask them how you can help. and talk about your feelings with
• Acknowledge the situation and let Make suggestions if they are someone during this stressful time.
them know you care – “I was really reluctant to receive help or they
sad to hear about…” are just unsure what they need. Grief is a process that each person
A few home-cooked meals, doing experiences in a unique way. It’s how
• Talk openly about their loss. you process, cope and learn to live
the shopping, helping to receive
• Be genuine and honest – “I’m not guests or perhaps offering to go with a significant loss. By allowing
sure what to say or do, but I want walking or do something enjoyable yourself to grieve and accepting the
you to know I am here for you”. with them can all help someone support of others you will begin to
through their grief. heal. You will not forget your loss but
• Offer your support – “What can I do
you will be able to look to the future
to help? Do you feel like talking?”. • Encourage them to slowly return with a sense of hope and find a way
• Ask how they are feeling. Each day to activities or social events that to live with your loss.
can be different for someone who they enjoy.
is grieving; take the time to listen • Keep supporting them. They will
and understand what they are need support throughout their time
going through. of grief, not just immediately after
• Talk about everyday life too. Their the loss.
loss and grief does not have to be • Be understanding and accept that
the focus of all your conversations. they may act or say things differently.
• Avoid statements that are intended • Offer extra support on special days.
to comfort them but actually Certain times and days of the year
minimise their grief. They know may be particularly hard, such
they have things to be thankful for, as holidays, family milestones,
or that at some point they have to birthdays, and anniversaries, as
move on, but for now they need they often reawaken grief.
time to grieve.
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More information and support
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Learn more about anxiety and depression, or talk it through with
our Support Service.
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Email or chat to us online at www.beyondblue.org.au/getsupport
LifeLine
www.lifeline.org.au
13 11 14
Access to crisis support, suicide prevention and mental health support services.
mindhealthconnect
www.mindhealthconnect.org.au
Access to trusted, relevant mental health care services, online
programs and resources.
GriefLine
www.griefline.org.au
1300 845 745
Grief helpline that provides telephone support services to individuals
and families.
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