Reflection paper

Roshini Thirumalaiyandi

Trent School of Business, Trent University

ADMN-2010H-A-2021WI – COMB Management Skills

Dr. Naveed Tariq

April 4, 2021
“It’s crazy how fast time flies and how things progress.” A few months back, when the new

semester was around the corner, the amount of curiosity and energy was up to the brim when my

professor said, “this course is about you and me. It’s about our own personalities.” Thenceforth,

this course aided me in learning new skills, honing my previous skills thereby introducing me to

the new colors of life. Throughout the semester, “Management skills” interested me in a plethora

of topics and techniques like procrastination, soft power, emotional intelligence, networking, and

courage that inspired me to apply in my personal and professional lives.

So far, I was to trying to put off this reflection essay to the last minute. I was always a person

who values what’s happening tomorrow rather than what’s happening today. Anxiety and a

tendency towards perfectionism was the ultimate reason as to why I delay or avoid things (Daft

& Marcic, 2014, p.128). In line with the topic “Just get started”, here I am taking small steps

instead of feeling overwhelmed. Similarly, using the technique “Slice and dice”, I’ve made the

project into tiny bites or parts to tackle them individually (Daft & Marcic, 2014, p.132). I learned

if the assignment is way too complex or large, breaking it down into smaller pieces and creating

a schedule to spend an ample amount of time in each part would help me better. Moreover,

creating a list of sub-tasks and striking off whenever I complete one satisfies me to the fullest.

And this small win would motivate me to march towards the completion of the progress.

Besides, I realized that striving for continuous improvement and excellence matters more than

perfection.

The only way to get better at things is trying and doing what one likes, by leaving the fear of

outcomes, perfection, and procrastination outside the classroom.

One of the other things that surprise me time and time again is the ability of the soft power to

attract others to want the outcome that I want without using a threat of force. On the astonishing

side, I never knew such influential power existed in reality until I got to learn this course.

I understood that this power of attraction would help me shape the preferences of others in the

workplace. As a manager with a simple smile and charms with a little diplomacy, I’d gain the

ability to persuade and move people by arguments through an attractive personality and special

knowledge.

In accordance with the principle “Helping people to like you”, I’d easily establish an inclusive

environment to bond and forge credibility into the relationships thereby developing allies (Daft

& Marcic, 2014, p.315 & 316). Being for the employees, helping them out, and fulfilling their

desires is the way I gain their’ buy-in and support when I want them to stand up for my concerns.

Thus, I’d build up credit in my bank of favors when helping them and in return, they’ll aid me in

fulfilling my requirements according to the rule of reciprocity (Daft & Marcic, 2014, p.315).

Besides, it’s not enough to whisper sweet strategies into their ears but playing with the expertise

and credibility builds trust in them of me (Daft & Marcic, 2014, p.316) For instance, in the event

of group meetings, opening my ears to their diverse opinions and thoughts would enable them to

value my expertise and seek out for me if required. In that case, active listening pays off at the

apparent time when I ask for want I want as they’ll feel obliged to believe and welcome new

changes in the organization without resistance (Daft & Marcic, 2014, p.316).

Subsequently, I came up with a new perspective that all these six principles of asserting

influence are interconnected and come in handy together for winning people through
collaboration and persuasion. Therefore, I felt that the adoption of such influential power would

aid me to build myself as a manager who is loved, respected, and trusted.

Similarly, it was a tremendous eye-opener for me to learn about the importance of emotions and

emotional intelligence. It made me realize that the more technology we have, the lesser we think

about the vitality of emotions in personal and professional lives. The four components of

emotional intelligence (self-awareness, self-management, social awareness, and relationship

management) are immense in recognizing and regulating my emotions as well as of others’ (Daft

& Marcic, 2014, p.57&58). Especially, self-awareness and relationship management are

exceptionally useful for me in understanding my strength & weaknesses, developing new

relationships, and being better at communication.

I understood that the way I manage my emotions can have an impact on every relationship I

come across in my life. It insisted me to have a constant check on emotions and be empathetic

towards others around me. Moreover, emotional intelligence matters more than it used to be as I

work largely with a team of diverse people with distinct emotions. For instance, being an

international student with higher emotional intelligence, I’d be capable of accepting changes as

they come on my way and welcome them as an opportunity for growth. Evidently, studies show

that people with higher emotional intelligence show a greater ability to adapt to new

environments and build strong bonds with others (Lopes et al., 2003).

Eventually, high EI earns me respect and appreciation as a manager, when I communicate clearly

while staying calm. It makes me see people from their frame of reference and helps in building

healthier relationships. Likewise, many corporations are promoting EI in their organizations

during selection, training, and placement phases to select an emotionally competent employee.
Similarly, in the event of teamwork, I’d tend to be a great communicator who puts others’

interests into consideration thereby listening to them in a non-judgmental way. To cite,

Lounsbury (2003) states that one with the highest emotional intelligence is the one who feels

more satisfied with their career (as cited in Amdurer, 2014).

Thus, the topic not only taught me to pay attention to my emotions but made me remember that

emotions can be fleeting at times and it’s necessary to work on it for the rest of my life to

become a better student, friend, and leader.

Furthermore, I remember the part of me which served as a perfect example of horrible

networking and who’d neither attend events nor attempt to connect with anyone. Eventually, I

turned out to be a person who falls into another category known as ambivert, who’s neither an

extrovert nor an introvert. This course reminded me that networking isn’t scary as it sounds by

enlightening me with its benefits and significance. As of now, my journey of networking

constitutes two factors, building new relationships and striving to become a kingpin or something

of value in near future (Daft & Marcic, 2014, p.308)

In the first place, I learned that striking conversations with someone new on a daily routine

would aid me in stepping out of the door. And, I should accept that today’s digital world and its

applications are leveraging, as networking can be quite difficult at normal times. Besides, as per

Klerk’s analysis, 51% of people tend to network through e-mail/telephone/social applications for

the initial connection, whereas 83% tend to build important relationships via face-to-face contact

(Klerk, 2010, p.44).

I felt it’s worth taking time to cultivate relationships and maintain as many professional

friendships as possible to gain contacts, knowledge, and current information. Specifically, I’ve
been initiating a small conversation by meeting for coffee or eating together at places for

collecting business cards or exchange social accounts to create lasting friendships (Daft &

Marcic, 2014, p.308). To cite, studies show that, 70% of the participants accept that cultural and

community events play a vital role in grouping people together with similar interests and goals

which in turn leads to kinship and exchange of information (Klerk, 2010, p.43).

On the other hand, I wanted to stand out in a good way (kingpin) that’ll enable people to

remember me in the long term (Daft & Marcic, 2014, p.308) For instance, I started applying for

positions to associate myself with various regional groups. Finally, being a first- year

representative of one of the regional groups expanded my communicative skills, self-confidence

and allowed me to think above the horizon which I’ve never thought before. Moreover, it

provided me with room for developing personal and professional relationships with my fellow

mates, seniors, graduates, and professors.

Although the main purpose of active networking is to build professional contacts, I realized that

at some point personal friendships tend to blossom when I meet people who share similar

interests or thoughts as mine. According to Klerk, 90% of people tend to network based on

emotional connection and trust because humans feel the need for emotional support and sharing

very strongly (Klerk, 2010, p.41).

Thus, I see that through networking I become more engaging and acquire experience, memories,

relationships, and new insights which would consecutively have a significant impact on my

career and life.

And, how could I forget the most powerful learning moment, which reminded me that the life I

want to experience requires courage, and to be courageous, I need the heart to step out and do

whatever it requires to have the totality of life which will be authentically mine.

I’d gladly accept that deep down somewhere, I had the fear to say no, the fear of failure, fear of

responsibility, and the fear of being wrong. The fear followed my happiness when I learned the

price for opting to pursue my education in Canada would be to leave my parents. Moreover, I

had the fear of trying something new, the fear of a new place, the fear of new people, etc by

going against the laid rules. Above all, fear paralyzed me when I heard people’s condemnations

and emotional barriers.

However, this topic changed my outlook, that choices are something that I get to make. Although

the outcomes are unclear and there are chances of being it to be worst, I get to decide on what I

want to experience or what I want to become without unduly influenced by others. In line with

the topic, “Courage means going against the grain, breaking traditions, reducing boundaries, and

initiating change”, I developed the courage to try things without considering what people might

think or see (Daft & Marcic, 2014, p.240).It hit me hard that fearing the unknown and not

attempting to try out things would stop my growth. Thus, experimenting with new things and

trusting my intuitions helped me to go through the courage of failure.

Likewise, I learned to harness my frustration and anger to reduce the level of stress and fear I

carry with myself (Daft & Marcic, 2014, p.242). I started converting my fear & anger into

courage and determination to stand up for myself against the hypocrites in my way. Similarly,

being flexible enough to face the hindrances along the way enabled me to gain self-confidence.

Most importantly, the courage of accepting failure and still being determined to achieve the
outcome helped me to pick up lessons on the way to become a much stronger person than I used

to be.

On the whole, if fear is an invitation to courage, I’d love to accept that invitation to choose

courage over fear to fuel my curiosity and learn things in my way to acquire experience.

To be honest, this journey unraveled the deeper truth of who I am and brought me face-to-face

with my own emotions, abilities, strengths, and even my deepest fears. Thus, this course granted

me the power to explore, assess and modify the complex aspects of myself to bring a new change

in me. Consequently, the attempt to understand myself put me in a better position to understand

others and develop greater empathy for their perspective too. John Dewey says, “We do not learn

from experience, but we learn from reflecting on experience.” And, I’d continue to learn and

reflect to become a better human, student, and leader.

References
 Amdurer, E., Boyatzis, R., Saatcioglu, A., Smith, M., & Taylor, S. (2014).Long Term Impact of

Emotional , Social, and Cognitive Intelligence competencies and GMAT on Career and Life

satisfaction and Career success. Frontiers in Psychology.

https://doi.org/10.3389/fpsyg.2014.01447

Daft, R., & Marcic, D. (2014). Building Management Skills: An Action -First Approach. South

Western Cengage Learning.

Klerk, D. (2010). The Importance of Networking as a Management Skills. Journal of Business

Management, 41(1), 37-49. https://sajbm.org/index.php/sajbm/article/view/512/441

Lopes, P. N., Salovey, P., and Straus, R. (2003). Emotional intelligence, personality, and the

perceived quality of social relationships. Pers. Individ. Dif. 35, 641–658.

https://doi.org/10.1016/S0191-8869(02)00242-8

Lounsbury, J. W., Loveland, J. M., Sundstrom, E. D., Gibson, L. W., Drost, A. W., and Hamrick,

F. L. (2003). An investigation of personality traits in relation to career satisfaction. J. Career

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