Where is My Free Will?

Lila Purusottama dasa, BGIS, Vrindavana

Every day we make decisions. For example, Pritam, a class XI boy from our school decided
that he will work hard to get admission into one of the IITs (premier technical institutes in
India) through joint entrance examination (JEE). His friend Gopal is pushed by his parent to
prepare for JEE against his will.

Is it that Pritam using his free will to prepare for JEE while Gopal is doing so against his
will?

What is meaning of this free-will? According to societal convention, it appears that a

powerful person will be able to actualize his free will while a less privileged person in the
society has less ability to actualize his/her free will. As per this convention, some have free
will while others do not have. In another convention, what all I desire are expressions of my
free will. Some are realized while most of them remain unfulfilled.

However, here is a contradiction. Something that is free – svatantra – cannot be subservient

to any other extraneous situations. If something that is my free will that must be independent
and must prevail in all situations. Pritam’s urge to prepare for IIT JEE does not guarantee him
an admission into an IIT. Gopal’s reluctant pursuit for JEE does not guarantee him a failure.
Where is thus FREE WILL manifest in such cases? We will look at this concept of free-will
using Bhagavad Gita philosophy. In Bhagavad Gita Lord Krishna declares Himself as God.
He is the source of both material and spiritual worlds.

I am the source of all spiritual and material worlds. Everything emanates from Me. The wise
who perfectly know this engage in My devotional service and worship Me with all their
hearts. BG 10.8

About His free will, Lord Krishna says:

The whole cosmic order is under Me. Under My will it is automatically manifested again and
again, and under My will it is annihilated at the end. BG 9.8

Being God alone, His will is supreme. He alone pervades the entire creation and sustains and
maintains it. It is by His will, the Sun provides light, Indra sends forth rain, and the wind
blows.

The sun who is the king of all the planets, full of infinite effulgence, the image of the good
soul, is as the eye of this world. I adore the primeval Lord Govinda in pursuance of whose
order the sun performs his journey mounting the wheel of time. Brahma Samhita 5.52

As every manifestations and events are simply expressions of Lord Krishna’s free will, where
is the free will of jiva? Jiva is atomic and is conditioned by illusory energy of Krishna from
time immemorial. The state of jiva is aptly described in BG 3.27:
The spirit soul bewildered by the influence of false ego thinks himself the doer of activities
that are in actuality carried out by the three modes of material nature. BG 3.27

Pritam’s decision to appear in JEE and Gopal’s reluctance to do so are simply manifestations
of three modes of material nature. These decisions are born out of material modes although
the conditioned jiva proclaims that he is the doer. In effect, the jiva is swayed by the force of
material energy so much that he just credits himself for all the successes come in his ways,
and mostly discredit others and other situational constraints for his failures.

As all actions are done by modes of material nature, is there any role for the jiva? Does he
have a free will? Ontologically, jiva is miniscule while Lord is infinite. As jiva is a part and
parcel of Krishna, he possesses Krishna’s potency to a very minute degree. Obviously, jiva
has free-will. What is that free will? Lord Krishna answers this question as:

Therefore get up. Prepare to fight and win glory. Conquer your enemies and enjoy a
flourishing kingdom. They are already put to death by My arrangement, and you, O
Savyasācī, can be but an instrument in the fight. BG 11.33

Here Lord Krishna advises Arjuna to become His mere instrument. In effect, He does
everything, while He credits to those jiva who accept the role of mere instruments. Arjuna’s
initial decision not to fight was born out of modes of material nature. Later Arjun fought the
battle as per the will of the Lord and hence used his free-will effectively. When we align our
free-will with that of the Lord, then there is no question of failure. The meaning of ‘free’ –
svatantra – is retained here as the free-will also attain the status of Absolute as being
subservient to the Absolute free-will of the Lord. Thus in my free-will, I am blessed to
understand Lord’s free will and am further blessed to act as a mere instrument to give shape
to the Lord’s will.

Under illusion you are now declining to act according to My direction. But, compelled by the
work born of your own nature, you will act all the same, O son of Kuntī. BG 18.60

Arjuna is an associate of Lord Krishna and thus he is able to naturally act according to Lord’s
FREE WILL. As a friend, he is in best situation to know Lord’s free will. What’s about us
mere mortals? How can we effectively know Lord’s FREE WILL? We are being helplessly
used by modes of material nature as puppet although some time we roar like a lion, at some
other time we behave like a king, yet at some other time we act as victims. In such situations,
how can I execute my free will?

Free will is a pure state. In a conditioned state, all my desires are perverted reflections of that
pure state – my tiny free will. That free will becomes self-evident to me when I am blessed
by sadhu, guru and sastra. It is by my fortunate contact with devotees of Lord, I come to learn
about Krishna’s will. It is by the mercy of Sri Guru I learn the mission of my Lord. I become
fortunate to be educated in the science of devotional service, the natural occupation of a jiva.
It is the determined and enthusiastic engagements in Lord’s devotional service, I start seeing
that it is Krishna who alone acts. I become cognizant that it is in my best interest that I accept
the will of the Lord and surrender to His mission. It is the power of devotion that burns all
impurities in my consciousness into ashes. In my transcendental senses, I gradually feel all
pervading presence of my Lord, more so, I see Him as my guide, friend, master as well as
beloved.

As a practicing devotee, sometime I like to have a pizza while at other times I like to have
pakoras. Sometimes I remain as brahmacari while at other times I act as householder.
Sometimes I earn money while at other time I engage myself in building a temple. In all such
acts, mostly my bodily modes have played key roles, although there may be keen desire to
please Sri Guru and Krishna. But there is an easy way out – if I simply follow instructions of
a pure devotee, in that following my free will is manifesting transcending my modes.

Because a person who has been covered by ignorance since time immemorial is not capable
of effecting his own self-realization, there must be some other personality who is in factual
knowledge of the Absolute Truth and can impart this knowledge to him. SB 11.22.10

Here is the end note. The Mahabharata battle is over in seventeen and half days. Duryodhana
and his brothers have been killed so also the great grandsire Bhishma and guru Dronacharya.
Draupadi is spending intimate times with her young five kids on that evening. Kids are quite
disturbed seeing the ghastly warfare. The mother is consoling the kids stating that this is the
dharmayuddha and everything is happening because of Krishna. She further stated that one
must surrender to the will of the Lord. As the affectionate mother opens her heart that only
survives for Krishna’s pleasure, the young kids were enthralled by the innocence of their
mother’s devotion. Their bitter feelings are cooled down by the love-filled ambrosia radiating
from Draupadi’s face. As the kids persist with the presence of their mother, the mother urges
to be with their fathers who must be very tired from a gruelling war and must be needing her
care. With the promise that mother will be there next morning to wake them up, Draupadi
leaves to take care of her husbands. As we learn from the history, five kids are killed much
before the sunrise. A grieving Draupadi can only shed tears while silently accepting Lord
Krishna’s prerogative to have her sons disappear from His leela. This is the way of great
devotees who always accepted Lord’s will.

Thus my free-will remains in my persistent endeavour in understanding the mission of Sri

Guru and Krishna. In my free will, I continue to adhere to sadhu, guru and Sastra. In my free
will, I serve the devotees. In my free will, I engage myself in preaching the divine message of
Bhagavad Gita. In my free will, I perceive Krishna’s free-will as Absolute.

Arjuna said: My dear Kṛṣṇa, O infallible one, my illusion is now gone. I have regained my
memory by Your mercy. I am now firm and free from doubt and am prepared to act
according to Your instructions. BG 18.73