.

,
·' ·

BUCH! EMECHETA
Second-Class Citizen
 Buehl Emecheta
SECON D-CLA SS
CITIZE N

George Braziller, New York

 I •

Contents
1. Childhood page 7
z.. Escape into Elitism 17
3• A Cold Welcome H
4. The Daily Minders 43
s. An Expensive Lesson ss
6. "Sorry, No Coloureds" 68
7. The Ghetto 79
8. Role Acceptance 94
First ublish · 9. Leaming the Rules no
p ed m the United States of America in 1975 by Geo B ·u I
rge raz1 er, nc. 10. Applying the Rules u7
Originally published in England by Allison &: Busby Limited
11. Population Control 140
Copyright IC) 1974 by Buchi Emecheta
u. The Collapse 149
AU rights reserved
13. The Ditch Pull 163
N? part of _this pub~~tion may be reproduced .
without pnor penrussion in Writin fro m ~ny form or by any means
g m the publisher.
For information, please address the pubr h
George Braziller, Inc. ts er:
171 Madison Avenue
New York, NY 10016

Ubrary of Congress Catalno;n · p .

Emecheta, Buchi. -o~,g-m- ubhcation Data:
Second-dass citizen.
Reprint. Originally published· N
l. TIiie. . ew York: G. BraziJler 1975 19
PR9387.9.E36S4 1983 823 82-2-USS , , c 74

ISBN 0-8076-1066-6

Printed and bound in the United States f A .

0
menca
Fourteenth Paperback Edition
 To "'Y dear ,hildre11
Floren• ,e, Sylve.tier, J'TaL - C'L . '
' " ' .nru ry and Al /
w1tho11/ who.re .rweet ba,J:.or
~· ...,.u 1'01 .ft.t
th . b L
u oo,.;; wo11/d not have been wrillen.
I praised so much tha t .Adah came
I
o•-J . 1'e,
Child/Jood
w, that sort of dream which
It had all begun like a dream. You kno yet one was always aware
seems to have originated from nowhere, could be directed by it;
one
of its existence. One could feel it,
a reality, a Presence.
unconsciously at first, unt il it became h to her dream, when
.M._a!!._did not know for sure what gave birt
she could pin down in this
it all started, but the earliest anchor
about eight years old. She
drif t of nothingness was when she was
exactly eight, because, you see,
was not even qui te sure that she was
she was a girl. She was a girl who
had arrived when everyone was
since she was such a disap-
expccti~g and predicting a boy. So,
edia te -family, to her tribe,
poi ntm ent to her parents, to her imm
h. She was so insignificant.
nobody tho ugh t of recording her birt
was born dur ing the Second
One thin g was certain, though : she
was being directed by her
Wo rld Wa r. She felt eigh t when she capable of so many mis-
be
dream, for a younger child would not she was grown up, she was
chiefs. Thi nki ng back on it all now that
r own fault; they should not
sorry for her parents. But it was thei
that would have saved a Jot of
have had her in the first place, and
peo ple a lot of headaches. the time when her mother
We ll, Ada h tho ugh t she was eigh t at ying themselves to wel-
e bus
and all the oth er society women wer
town Ibuza. Whenever .Adah
come the very first lawyer of thei r
found it difficult to under-
was told tha t lbuza was her town, she
came from Ibuza, and so did
stand. Her parents, she was told,
she was told, was a beautiful
man y of her aunts and uncles. Ibuza,
early age tha t the people. of
tow n. She had been taug ht at an
there w~ fresh, the sprmg
Jbuza wer e friendly, tha t the food
n. The vutues ?f Ibuza ".'ere
wat er was pur e and the air was clea
to regard her bemg born m . a
misfortune. He_r parents satd
God-forsaken plac e like Lagos as a
bringing up children because
tha t Lagos was a bad place, bad for
bati accent. It was bad because
her e they picked up the Yoruba-Ng
7
 s so ha pp y
ruJ-.i s we re ol d, they fitted her. She wa
wi th law s, a to w n w he re La w ,;;:u su pr em e
In by th e time he r dr es se
at sh e be gg ed he r m
ot he r to le t
it was a to wn
ur ow n ha nd s. 1T a- - with this ne w "L aw ye r dr es s" th
gr ea t day. It
lb th ·d to~k -th e la w in to yo
- bu ~ e .A papa W ha rf on th e
uza, ey sa t , you """r str a,g h1- m to he r he r go with th e wo m en to th
sed th at sh e was no
t go in g to
, yo u
woman - ~ u se ~ u r ch dd
go t be at en up as th e-· -
se
·
m1
•· :;__
gnt . pained he r so m uc h wh en sh e re ali
ol day.
draggec!_ ~e r ou t,dbe• at he r up or
- t
,
an d be at
ca
en u be allowed to go be
cause it feJl on a scho ! Th ey were realising
d"
n t w an t to be .dra
gged ou _n wi th th at
S "f
. . be. o ~ you , an 's ch ild . Lagos wa s bad-"- ~
----t-~hyois & ho ol - th e Ibos ne
ver pl ay
po
ed
ve rty an d disease was education
.
no th er wo m vi ou r fro m Bo ys
wouJdn-t- abuse.a -- -Y ou ha d to 1- p .. co nt ro l fast th at on e's sa re n attended school.
type o f behav ,o
·
ur was no t al lo we d. - - ~ n lO fu - fa m ily sa w to it th at th ei r ch ild ah was
--
h"1ch .Adah wa s ta ug ht wa s ag ai ns t th e Ja w c, f- Ev er y Ib o . So even though Ad d be
JOur..
tem
per, w
liv ed in Lagos w er
e pr ep ar in g ;1; ~: were usually given
er e we
pr ef er en ce , th
re still discussions ab
ou gh
out wh et he r it woul
it was
!he Ibuza wo m en w ho
fir st la wy er fr om th e nr·t-c;u
U .i K i d om . Th e
ng
ab ou t eig ht , th
wise to send he r to
sc ho ol. Ev en if sh e was se nt to school,
ng. ".A
~ e to wn 's -- th er se to le t he r stay lo
ar nv al of "te
titJ "U d -l( j dom..-- -w he n- pr on ou nc ed by A da h' s fa bs. very do ub tfu l wh et
he r it wo ul d be wi
e an d
ng th bo m sh e ca n wr ite he r nam
so e - nr e associated wi do , as lo ng as ard he r
~ tke_ type of no ise on year or two wo ul d se w. " .Adah ha d he
I unded so heavy, lik st .Adah's fa th er .al wa
·- vo ic ed it
ys ll le ar n ho w to
ds. Soon, Ad ah 's
so m y er ro us , th at ·
.Vt'S!._e count. Th en sh e wi y times to he r frien
. t hwashsod_d ~ a · ch ec tfu l ex p_ res s,o n as .if be sa y th is m an y m an
rn us. e to nes• we • nn ~ su a re sp G oi ng to th e U ni te d King:_ m ot he r
- y, sta rte d school. dg e her. W he n-
s _Jr est of Ho lie s. younger brother, Bo 's dr ea m sta rte d to nu
dpeaJc.ing o~ G od s Ho ni te d Ki~g- th at Ad ah
b be _ lik e pa yi ng G od a vi si f -T he- U It was at th is tim e
ak In sti tu te , as th e scho
ol was called,
d~ : mth~ surus eJy La di -L
aven ev er sh e took Bo y to ds lin in g up by
' en, m t e 1ik e he l from th e e ga te an d watch aJJ he r fri en
tical co tto n m at er ia sh e wo ul d sta nd by th
vy-blue pi na fo re s lo
ok in g de an
U~~ women of lb uz a bo ug ht id en sm ar t na
an d bl ou se s of in th ei r preparatory
~ it ~a de in to l~ppas th e school door ,
to re an d ha wa s th en , an d stiH is, a very smaH
:~ t -L ak language.
the sa m ?:
combs to m le it
rt

lllJ-
1:J~
-
th eac ta u- ,.a n~ ~t µJg!Jtened..it wi th ho
~u_ropean.wh oob ody m he r eithgh tUsens
bt tn .. .
es w ou
.
ld
an d orderly. Ladi
school. Ch ild re n we re
s
no
su
t
ch
ta ug
an
ht
ex
Yo
pe
ru ba or any Af ric an
ns iv e school. The prop ha lf
rietress
dr ea in oT w~ lc~
ng a 1awtu yer ha d e m te d K m g- Th is was why it wa at time, m or e th an
ft JJ • lO
ng s, in th e Un ite d Ki ng do m . .At th en hi gh ly
dom with he r ha ir le e :: w r: Y m _curls. Th ey composed so re was tra in ed
ho ol we re lb os, as they we re th
m e of th m en we th e t:hildren in th e sc ere, .filled
weavin g th e na 1
.; :e r m to th em. Th
es e wo
cla ss va lu es . .A dah wo ul d sta nd th
so pr ou d_o ~ new
la ea n!_:~y r- c- iv aI m ot iv at ed by middl
e- ich sh e
~ r, ~- ause. to th ~ it m
vy la te r ga ve wa y to frustration, wh
of th ei r v~ '! .. .2 ~
al ly ae at ed fo r th e wi th envy. Th is en , ju st fo r th e joy of
h wh · M~Jd•~ ea 1· . aJ J ways. Sh e wo ul d lie
I6uza pe op le. A - M es sia wou ; go ro to rhcs an d .fi ht fo r sh ow ed in m an y sm he r. Because, sh e
disobeying he r m ot
0 0
. h ·o f Jb oz a:- . et jo y in
. e ng ts of th e pe op Je
es ah -w ho would se
e to lying; sh e to ok se cr n lo ii th at I
th
a, Pa wo ul d ha ve ue
51
uJ d- ha ve -e Je ct r:. el f: If no t fo r M
it th ac lb uz a- wa _ha ~- ; a th ou gh t to he rs
ah 's m o~ ~( ~a ~• ~b uz a_ w?,u_!d Bo y.
~r re d road (which
Ad O h, yes, Jlarled JChool wi th th ei r house
do all so rts of th. Ko l ta r ). pe s sit tin g on th e ve ra nd a of
Lawyer Nw ez e was
go in g to rngs fo r th e op le of O ne af te rn oo n, M a wa
h' s he lp , sh e ha d cooked
th e
W ith A da
Ibuza. at Ak in wu ru ni Stre
et. rte d to un do he r
s a seamstres th e d bo th eaten. M a sta
Ad ah 's m ot he r wa ry lucky bees, 50 she made most of af te rn oo n m ea l an d th ey ha
do th is a m ill io n
blouses. Ad . ah wa s ve au se sh e ha d
~ome rem nts na re -p lai ted . A da h ha d se en he r
,
ha ir, re ad y to ha ve it in g fo r he r
f ro m th e materia l m ad e in to a fro ck f h
She still remem. bere
d
re d w ith wa tc hi ng he r. Th er e was no th
r that hoer mer. tim es an d was bo mis-
th e frock; it wa s so bi g fo r he s or e or Je ss swam rn to it to pl ay w ith ; th ere was no t even an y
m of male. h to do , there was no
bo dy
dd en ly str uc k he r.
Yes, she
H er m oth er wo ul d never drea w~:/:i a dress th at was· e th ou gh t su
ca us e, yo u se e, sh e s :
outgrow it. So ch ie f to pl an . Th en
th
no t go to Ladi-Lak
, because Boy
exactly he r siz e be a sm al l gi rl to o ski
0
Sh e wo ul d
ol . ch an expen-
&
r age, What. w ou ld go to sc ho
ev en th ou gh"gh sh e wa s ' d dresse y
nns th io r he
m ig ht as k he r to pay, it be in g su
be, sh e always ha wa s th er e an d th ey ro un d th e
ev er th at mr t on s fo r liJcing orfd or
four shes
ul d go to th e M et ho di st School
on e of he r re as dr es ses 51. siv e school. Sh e wo
bigger. Th at was ' 0c e
8 9
 child
. alm os t ho ld an d feeJ it. Then one silly
a ha d sa id that she liked ible that one co uld til almost every
corner. It was chea pe r, he r M
l th the. unt- e others followed suit, un
attended it and M Co started to gig gle an d th le way that
form, mo st of he r fri en ds th e Se rra gi gg lin g in such an uncontrollab r all be
xt door t~ them t:u gh :, ere. ~ es, child in the da .ss wa s
ne crazy, fo
lcoruan ne igh bo ur liv in g ne '
M r Cole glared at the
children who had all go
she would go there. Th e ch ild who sta rted the giggle
ha pp en ed . the
ough, though it was
too bi knew. Then it nd an d pointed at .Adah with
Her dress was dean en covered her mouth wi th on e ha
into tf ~i ~: o: ~
ft : s_marteodit up. She went other. ndsome. H e
:~ u! h~ fJ :: tt !:
roun and round, so m
uch so that it ric an, very young, very ha
looked lik hn .'t
s rop e? then tied it round he r
little Mr Co le
l
wa
bla
s
clc
a hu
ma
ge
n.
Af
Hi s bla ckness shone like polis
hed b1adc
.Adah
er i:e e d~ mb er' was a rea but he used to smile at M r
waist, pul~n~Pt cbildl'en went to qu iet ma n,
~ r~ up a little. Other leather. H e wa s a ve ry .Adah was su re
th sla tes look r on bu way to school.
-
wi
~
l
schoo
to m ~ ~ Sh f had non~. It would every time he passed he smile now, front of all ah
in these
ridiculous for he
pencil. Then anoth
r
er tho h:° o
stru
a c as sroom without a slate
d always watched
and
Cole would giv
.
e
M
he
r
r th
Co
at
le
rea ssu rin g
aity, that Ad
spun round with such ala r Cole, it was
e• Pa ha d b Jc ug Ia ck her. She ha ually sharpened a gig gli ng idi ots
She was not frightened
of M
Pa sh av
funny so~ of cur: ro e~ s te, on wruch he
ab _often wa
us
tch ed him do this,
took a step backwards.
just th at th e mo ve me nt wa s so quick and so unexpected of M r
at he expected
fascinated. .A fte r ed ~: !e . :d
some car- lk . On ly God above knew wh
he r ~ ch ig e kn ife , Pa would rub Cole, wi th his gr ea t bu
ril la or a wandering "masqu
erade"
bolic soap lat ave away. .Adah d him . A big go
te B t th n and then would sh to find behin .
was .Adah, staring at him in the situation
tho ug ht of thi s sla s so small. ]w t all he saw
ce . It wo .uldu no t trouble was that it wa small bit of pe rhap s. Bu t
did not laugh, be took
a sm all pie
I take many letters, bu . .
ta God bless M r Cole. He of those special smiles, held out his
slate was better than no s ate at all She then slipped tt mto the top immediately, gave .Ada
h one head, and
d
0 f h er ress, knowing fu ll well
th -b elt wo ul d bo ld it d led he r to a bo y wh o had craw-craw on his
of this
s wi th he r Be t h at her scarf of M a's m- . hand, an h di d not know what to make but
up. Lucic wa s eit leftdthe room , one to sit do wn . .A da
. ore gestured her why she came,
cam le should have asked her loud voice:
le fri en ds f
numerab • e or a vis women were so
th
t th~~ 1·d e two tic gesture. She felt Mr Co
the ir ch it-c ha t tha e when .Adah ile, she said in her little
e;1g~ se d tn
m. ·, not no being reassured by his sm parents would not send m e! "
s P. ,-. past the "I came to school - my more, the boy with the craw-craw on
ThUJ .Adah went to sch ool Sh e could be~iore ce
uld sto p he r. Sh e did no e ran asanfast fas.._sh The class-went quiet on a lecturer in Lagos Ci ty Hospital)
anyon~it co t see
yo nu 's friends be-
1
ca me
cause was past IJl.Jdday and very hot· his head ( he later be Adah scribbled away, en
joying the
t alk She• most_peopJenn were too tired t of hi s pe nc il, an d ell of
s~U:.1 the st~ects at thishotime.
11:'U to trot lik
e a lame
~•
. .
hr ed
Bot hre
of tro
d
ttin g
ru
h
in
g and she
gave her a
smeH of craw-
bi
cra w an d dr ied sw ea t. She never forgot this sm
was soon at the schoolr ed . She school. t_they must go
~e ;e re two bu ild :n ;~~ on for .Adah's liking. Bu come again
pound. On e wa s the ch '::
had heard fro •n e com- The day ended too so could
that the church waa s never , an s e cla friends her. Yes, of course she
h bc us ed as a ssr oo m Sh m he r home, M r Cole assured ts would not allow her to come, he
was the ch urc t ;t =e ;' Which ed , bu t if he r pa ren only Mr
a/ :; ,: ~ ~u gh she had ~o r h ~ sc h~ !, if she lik to tea ch her the alphabet. H
e att en de d Su nd it up on hi ms elf ht:
d do ': ~ church. With would take o it. Pa would be all rig
sh he
ts int
determination, she walke g for Mr ~ j r.n he r pa ren
u wa s eas y fo r he~US:
r ~~~e loo kin
arates
Cole would no t br
ly
ing
ca ne her, you know, just a few
strokes - six or
class. Th
low car db oa rd-liJcc e ~J~ses were scp y Cd he wo uld pr ob ab
uld not cane, she would
smack and
from each oth er by . It was eas ch - bu t M a wo
ply walking do w !a :ti o~
sec aII the classes by sim le she walked int h~ middle. to so, no t mu
nag all day long.
n sh e saw M r Co O stn rw smack, and then nag and s these experiences wi th Ma so early in
Whe looked f•s ass an d L.
She thought that it wa n sex.
. The other chiidren th · Wo~ uc- lo w opinion of her ow
.d

hind him"d up rom

hu sh cir rJc llld en he r su ch a ve ry
ah ·
Jn wonder. At fir st the re wa s a life th::t had giv arc usually formed
ed
star at .n • a hush sot ·
ll)8 me bo dy sa id so me wh ere that our characters
IO
So
II
 ft C 41

dered.
• ade know w ha t th at means?" be thuntwo things : a heavy fine
that som..1 .--U1(]y was ri.ght Wi en still m "Y ou
knew court meant hich she
Ma nodded. She r be able to afford. or prison, w oloucful
early in lif
.Adah nervous. The
djd have one or tw
e. Ye s '
y ha
o wom
d a
en
w
\;V
a
fr ie
n
o
~:g
f
nd
in
sa
s
re al
.

trou bl
.

e
om
!~ :! -c o ~ d e n
c . She
e
e discussed the
ld rather
which she would
called "pilizon".
T
neve
he
da
y
h
ad
to
vi
sc
se
ho
d
ol
he
,
r to sell one o f
her c.
ed like a child
because she look dah a queer
weather, and faM shion. But whel 'd -L
• sh e wou lappas and send .Alearn. .At this point Ma gave .Aand wonder.
were so SO I , SO Si llC who was keen to contained a mixture o f fear, Jove
look for a man ' en . .
ok he r to th e stall o f a aa se ll ing /Joli, whjch j5 look - a look that Cole.
Mr Cole to
for roasted pl an t . w o~
ese women usuallywere
had . still clutching M c
.Adah shrank badehome from the station, the news ha mzon". So
d already got
the Yoruba name th m . am.
open pots in whjch a :e · ~ e a kind o f coal fire. The
se fires When they go t her to "p
ha d ne ac ly sent her mot dah began to be quite
covered with wire
r ~asti~ ! g
plantains, ready fo ,y. It was· r h e ed her w ,t h
0
~ ~ e. /a u ze w~re placed/Joli and
a big
peeled round. .A dah
frequently was th
lsive move. She
ed that .A
is sentence repeat triumphant, especially when
fe lt
lowed .Adah
told her no t to w or
er st or y when th ey go t home; at proud o f her impu s advising hi m to make sure he al e veranda,
:o t nd th
home things had go
t out o f h 2; she heard Pa's frie . This discussion took place on ine to wet
e was b ,g · U:, · going on. Pa ha
d been to start scho ol so on
o kegs o f palm -w
In fact theror ~l la ba lo o were downing tw , .Adah was le ft
alone
called from w k
Ma ing charged with where the visitors ey de pa rt ed
th th e police be ats. Whe n th
child neglect, a n
/t h e ~ ~ : thw,
d caused all the
fuss was little their parched thro shed
l of them af at ~a They took with be t parent s. t they would be. Pa .fi d
.Adah, staring at al n an ' raid and yet trjumphant. l o f gari as bad as sh e th ou gh
be nd it. .Adah di
at io w Things were not strokes for Ma's
~ a to the police st a tast ~ forced bee to drink a big bo ga ve he r a fe w Maybe Pa had
w,th water. Gari
is cassava. out the cane and not hard strokes. when .Adah
eaten w~::S
When cooked and type M soup, it ts delicious. B me a tor-
so rt ? f. Bour made from hen un-
ut w ca us e th ey w er e
not mind that be e talks with bis friends, because y, just as
th ousl
e w at er ed k, it be ca been mel low ed by
an d talked to her seri
cooked, th
ia J in fa ct , a was forced to drin cried after the ca
ning , be ca m e
d be e by her pet nam r from
e, "N ae
tui1Purgator own up ! H e ca lle t so fa
ose policem en, .Adah st.ill wondered w,h th ey got all their if she were a gr "Father's mother", which was no name was
e .
unwritten keJat w s f.
m
.
. Th is happened t th erpol,ce station near nna", which m ea ns
me. How sh e cam
e by th at
Sabo Mar to
them with t- - ~ h er e
Plies th at sh e could the meaning o f A da h' s re al na
swaJJow the ga · ~ a told -- ~s ,n at she
d promised Pa th she
k -r
.
r, no more. She m us t d .n
;h.ole lot, she wIf
as a story in itself. dy in g, sh e ha
an d to ld e, r was sorry
to ld ,
u: la n ~ g e th at .A ;~ h~
h,nd M r Cole. When Pa's mothe time as his daughter. She was ly .five.
Ma did not li::;shsH e gar,, the policemen would n, th is
would come agai ing him up. She died when Pa pensate for
w as on
take her to co ur t
he d at th":en on, theys those
t br com
ow th ey la ug
horrid men; and h w they scared Adah , M e1r own lpj~D he r
joke could not live to ai n, sh e ha d promised, to Ma at the
ag
eyes dila tin g . .A d~ cd atwhe nt on gu She would come g. Well, Pa grew up and married
Lw_as ~ared; she sta~ urch. But Pa did
0
un
had said ve.ryhlittle'~ 8 8 = th epo1·icemen to 5ot
owJ' and Pa, 'who leaving rum so yo ch w as a Christian ch
Lago s, w hi he had was
Mago no"-', e explained• f,or she had J op. They sh oo.ld Jet Christ Church in e. T he on ly reservation
he r Jes her's pr om is s mother was
great tasl lker ve.ry careless, otherw·
i , A
ea
da
rn
h
t
W ould son. She was
a not forget bis mot t a girl for his :tirst child. Well, hi picture o f
to an ry
le W that he did not w girl. Pa thought .Adah was the ve
ab ha d JS e
as sh e e be en
th h p away Were like tha~o~av a months ematur
ely.
th :r ~17i'1 ate, go ss ip ed and ~lept~eney 'IIVould not · ey sat in
the Ji
en properly. Buth d po cernen shouJd f< ev~n lo r n o r/
ok afte
i~patient ! Ma ha
his mother, even
d
though Ada h w as
,
bo
da
rn tw o
mp monkey-like
pr
tbiog w ith
beca e ha d gi ve he th at th e lit tle
e was loaded
use p~ thought sh an con:iden~gh ga,i. or ' tive
H e was quite posi his· ''come bade mother' '. So sh
The chief cu policem this I as Adah .Eze" !
• er =
r m ou : ea,_ th en look ed o unformed face w es: "N ne noa", ".Adah nna", ".
more at Ma
smiled. He ;o o f
p tg the ga,i to he
n:~~r'::;~f; 1::ct~~t~;\!';t:rs:L~:; w ith strings o f
nam
ug ht er o f a king. Somet
imes they

should happen a g
::P~
~: t e her to the court.
..,"CJg
called her Adah
Ez
Princess, da
.Adah Eze means e, sometimes Adah nna and so
metimes N oe

12
13
 long and t
nna. But this string of names was too and ev oo confusing for ·
.Adah's Yoruba friends and playmat es so-alled joys of civilisation and all its p py women, to wel-
" Sh ~?d ~ore_so for im- They went to the wharf that day, thes
patient Ma. So she became just ".Adah a taste of that civilisation;
it. Whe Jshn t mmdup this. It come someone who had been to have
was short: everybody could pronounce . e grew ' and rds to hook them all, like
tt d. th
en
ls' High School in La the civilisation which was soon afterwa
was a en. mg e Methodist Gir come their man.
an m; SJO . h gos, where opium. That day, they were happy to wel h still remembered its
she came JO contact with Eurone
•
r uuS nanes, er name They went in their new uniform . .Ada pale blue drawings
f th nced correctl . was one
o e first ones they learned and pronou with
nam ~ ~s;;~~~
colour. It had a dark velvety background it was tied in such a
red, and
tre h::_: start against the other girls with Jong!
shogo e is1 of feathers on it. The hea dsca rf was
hair. The shoes they wore
am6.....,se, or OluwafunmiJayo OJorun way that it displayed their straightened
e-nine". No one really knew
were of black patent leather called "nin
Pa would not hear of h repetition. In any case they
So_ that was how Adah started school. why, maybe it was the rhythm of the
r "Ezidiji ji de ogoli ome
to the posh on:r wore these "nine-nine" shoes with thei
~~~~i! the M~ odi ~t Primary; she was to go e earlier to her if oba" and bought new gourds which
they covered with colourful
have com they produced sounds like
Pa had l: S~cc:s 1: lidf~ would surely r, and Adah and her brother beads. Wh en these gourds were rattled,
B ive · ut e ied soon afte Despite all this Adah,s the Spanish samba, with a wild sort of
animal overtone.
oy were transferred to an inferior school. ' They had had a good time, .Adah was
told later. They danced
dream never left her.

Ja~=.~:: st
~~ b~ at: ~;: -a refused to take her to
the preparations for the reat ed ~oo
see the new
_l only a few weeks before
.man s arnval • Ma really got furious
The European arrivals gaped at them
thing like it before. The clim ax of it
. They
urful gourds in the air.
happily at the wharf, shaking their colo had never seen any·
all was when an English-
singled out women with
with .Adah for askin suchg a thm man took their photographs. He even
g g. ral shots of them. Ma and
"Y J babies behind their backs and took seve
ou made me drink gari onl . Y ast monthschunti1l N I nearly burst e their pictures taken by
my stomach all bccause you said ted her friends were reaJJy happy to hav
' you wan oo . ow we gave re Nigerian independence
you school, you want the wharf Europeans! These were the days befo
n't go. You chose brought hundreds of English
school. To school you must go fro. No,
you _wo when nearly every boat from England schools and hospitals of
go grey."
unt d you
How right Ma was! .Adah wo : now stop learning. She had graduates and doctors to work in the
d nev er
been a student ever since. Lagos. of Nwcze's arrival were
I Adah's face had fallen at this If The few gaps in the magical story
she had known before, t to welcome him the fol·
she would have staged her school ~~ly filled in by Pa. .AH the Ibuza men wen
their places of work during

I
I
LaW>:er Nweze. But as it turned out, she
p_r~se d their songs several times a d
~htch..they had given the name Ezid~ji
mg : .~e n a good man holds a wo~
queen.. They wove the name of the unif
~a after the arrival of
sh missed little. The women
·; ~wed o~ their uniform to
e ogol,, ome oha, mean-
,an, ~e becomes like the
~;m in~o the song, and it
lowing Sunday. They could not leave
the week. Pa said that the lawyer cou
any more; he could not even eat a piec
cooked for him had to be stewed for
pulp. "I felt like being sick," Pa said
ld not swallow pounded Yapl
e of bone. The meat they
days until it was almost a
as he spat on the Boor. "It
we ate in the army. Th~re
~as a_Joy t~ hear and sec these womeen!
J~t like children. Their wants
wer r PY IQ their innocen
late;unp and easily met. r-t•
reminded me of the sickly, watery food
is one thing, though," Pa went on,
"he did not bring a white
e ed with him that that was
I like those of their children who
tangled web of industrialisation Ada
tS:
h's
.
~ught up in the ~t
ad no experience of
woman with hjm." .AU Pa's friends agre
a good thing. If Nweze had brough
t a white woman to Ibuza,
having to keep up mortgage p;yments -: .never knew what it !
Oboshi would have sent leprosy on her superstitions of the Western
~t
was to have a fam jly car, or worry abo _:_ J~na.rds; she had no Remembering aU thes e tabo os and
ut pollutio n, the pop ulat ion laughing to herself. Sh_e had
worries aboth -··r1os1on or race. """'
.. ~
was hap py bcin was it Ibos of Nigeria, .Adah could not help
surprm ng, ere1 .ore, that she 8 unaware of th e part of her, yet now, m the
•
e been brought up with them, they wer
14
15
 .
ent ies , the tho ug ht of the m amused b
sev rue st thiog
about all th ~e superstition
s an d beliefs wase~ ~ e fu~ ll had such
mi nd s of he r peor, l Na t ey sti
a doleful gn p on the r e. o onth e da r d · ore
ign
any of them : Le~cosy wa s a disease wi th which e goeddess of
2
th b. Ibu za cu rse d
e igg est civ et in to Ro u t one
an yo ne wh o da red
of the town's traditions.
Well, Pa an d his fri en dsNw
wy er
toasted th
ez e to e goddess of th e
riv er Oboshi Escape into Elitism
for no t all ow ing .La osbi was
ug h to gu ide the tho u h go astray. Th at Ob
strong eno ed he r
toa ste d he r ag ain . 8 ts of Nweze, demonstrat dre am ers .know qu ite well, do
ha ve setbacks.
power. Th ey Mo st dre am s, as aJJ
k h ion, for he rs ha d many.
Later, .Adah did no t re~ ow w. at came over that civec
Oboshi Ad ah 's dream was no except a sud de n. Ju st a few mo nth
s aft er
though. OiJ was dis co ve ch ha pp en ed all of
the oil: Th e firs t hit e could
o he r, wi tho ut ;:r y.n ea r hec, ~d sh e all ow ed n oo l, Pa we nt to the hospital for something, sh
m with leprosy. Th e oilme
me n to dig int sh e sta rte d sch ite sur e wh o it
h "ch rsm g the o someone - sh e was no t qu
were ma inl y wh ite ...
• "" 1 was a SU I'p ris •
e. c perhaps sh e ha d lon gt no t remember what. Th en day s. .A we ek or
b th s staying the re for a few
was - told he r tha t Pa wa
.... __
~ declared red un da nt wo uld no t ngs moved
thi
y e gre ate r go ds . Th at ho me ; a corpse. Af ter tha
ha ve surprised Ad ah f, tw o later Pa was bro ug ht ah, lik e mo st
n go dd esor ~; l)'b od y could be de cla red red un da nt so fast tha t sh e sometime
s go t the m confused. Ad
these _da ys, eve mu st ha ve the r as a ser-
no t red un da nt, the n she th he r mo the r's eld er bro
been m a Rip Van Wi:.::·e sleep, foe she also allowed the Ha us a rph an s, wa s to liv e wi
girl-o Jive with
eri ted by Pa 's brother, an d Boy was to
soldiers to come an d ssacre he r son s d n had vant. M a wa s inh
ed tha t the mo ne y in the
family, a
mare.1ed L 'ite womenma wi tho ut . • an so me lbu za me on e of Pa 's cou sin s. It wa s de cid
education. So
• Wu
d ma rri e~ ~J O~ !eprosy.
Only last ye ar an wo uld be spe nt on Boy's
!_?; 2
; gir l gra du ate ha ! So Oboshi hu nd red po un ds or two, ar school educa-
r sons d ; ite .American gh t fut ure , wi th a gra mm
the ~t er than most of he ing up wi th Bo y was cu t ou t for a bri pped, bu t
an aughters at ca tch
d all tha t. .A dah 's sch ooling wo uld ha ve been sto
.A es. tio n an
lon ge r sh e stayed at sch
ool, the
nyway, the ta.lk abo ut N weze's arrival so m e~ y po int ed ou t tha t the
r. Af ter all,
months. Ad ah talk ed about him to all h w_ent on foe mo nth s an d do wr y he r fut ure hu sb an d wo uld pay for he
big ge r the d more-
the m tha t he school, tel lin g at the ag e of nin e or so, an
sh e mi gh t as:::i ~r
it;~
cou
sh_
sin. Well, ev :~ t:; nd s at
e ma de a secret vo : else talked
big, so
sh e was too yo un g
ov er the ex tra mo ne y sh e
for ma rri ag e
wo uld fetch wo uld tid e Bo
y ov er. So, for
would go to this Un herself tha t sh e at school.
na cle of h Kin ~~ om one day ff to _ the tim e being, .Adah stayed l, the cleanliness, the orderliness an d
be the pin l there would .Adah missed he r old sch
oo
:iti on . She dar~d er arriva no t co nti nu e there. Th e
fee was al-
mi gh t decide to havee~ am l _an yone; the y sh e co uld
thcad examined orno t tel the bri gh tne ss, bu t
ers an d sh e ha d to ge t he rse
lf used
gir l of he r kind, with a e; . A sm all t of the oth
no th: er who was onl ;om~thtng an an d a mo st six tim es the cos
no t be allowed
mo the r wh o kn ew
ng bu t the lbo yB. rad wa ym ool, oth erw ise sh e wo uld
.Anglican hy mn bo ok , f to an old er an d no isi er sch m he r sho rt
the Introduction to thibelcIndan
d the Ibo e ha d ga ine d som eth ing fro
tha t Jerus:ioemm to go to school at aJJ . Bu t sh which pu t he r
stjlJ tho ug ht was at th · an d wh o go od an d sou nd be gin nin g,
Th sh e wo uld go to the U . e rig ht hand of G ex, sta y at La di- La k, a ve ry s gre atl y -
at
b t nited King do m od.
of he r ne w cla ss. He r efforts am use d he r cousin t
dre am sh e ke pt to he rse lf day ''"' " ah ea d
gir l. Sh e was gla d, though, th~
u dreams soon ass-n--..e~dnesubst - a the y reg ard ed he r as a fun ny lit tle
lived with her:• ,·ust like a Pr'esence. ance. It dre am away aft er sh e ha d
do ne he r day s
the y me rci ful ly left be e to
in the
wo rk.
y's wo rk! Jes us ! He e da y sta rte d at fou r-t hir ty
Th e da , the re
On the ve ran da of he r ne w ho me in Pik e Street
mo rni ng . Ad ah ha d to fill
as a wa ter co nta ine r an d
16 wa s a mi gh ty dru m us ed
17
 . bef re going to schqol. This usually meant making
th .15 with water o . " " th rich man who would allow Ma and Boy to come and stay with her.
ten to twe ve l trips to the public pump , as osc public That would have solved a- lot of problems, but th~_lcind of _Jilen
monstrosities were called in those days. , that she was being pushed to by her clever cousins and Ma's tactful
In n•dah's n-." family there was Ma
on1
'f s brother
. who . .worked in hints were bald and huge, almost as big as her dead Pa.
the dockyard at the m arina· his old w1 e, a quiet, retmng woman
• . . Ma had told her that older men took better care of their wives
adow to her autocratic husband; and their four mighty
who was a sh . d 'th d h than the young and overeducated ones, but Adah didn't like them.
ll grown up. One was mame w1 a young aug ter, one She would never, never in her life get married to any man, rich or
sons, a th
was working as a clerk in e T reasury, one was an artist, .
who poor, to whom she would have to serve his food on bended knee :
ould stay at home and sing all day long, the youngest was at a she would not consent to live with a husband whom she would have
;nishing school. So Pa's death w~ a blessing to the~, fo~ it meant to treat as a master and refer to as "Sir" even behind his
they could have Adah as an unpaid servant to help m tlus bulging back. She knew that all Ibo women did this, but she wasn't going
household. All these people occupied only one roo~ and a ver- to!
anda yet the house had ten rooms ! One could imagine the Unfortunately, her obstinacy gained her a very bad reputation;
number of households that depended on the pump at Pike Street, what nobody told her then was that the older men were en·
for it served eight other streets as well. It was always a case of first couraged to come and "talk" to her because onlfthey could afford
come, first served. By seven or eight in the mornings there were the high "bride-price" Ma was asking. Since, however, she didn't
usually fights, metal buckets were thrown in the air, fists drawn, know this, as soon as she saw one of those "baldics" in his white
and clothes tom. To avoid this rush hour, .Adah was usually starched trousers, she would burst into native songs about bad old
woken up_ at four-thirty. Her being up so early was also a great baldies. If that failed to repel them, she would go to the back yard
help to her new Pa and master. He went to wor~ _!,y six-thirty in and burst the bicycle tyres of the suitors. She discovered later
the mornings and Adah had to be there to get him his odds and this was very bad indeed, because she had since learnt that ·the
ends. Nigerian Government usually gave the junior clerks an advance
One might think on this evidence that Africans treated their for these bicycles. All the suitors were doing then was to ask for
childten badly. But to Adah's people and to Adah herself, this was- the advance for their new Raleigh bikes with flashy lights in order
not so at all; it was the custom. qiildren, especially girls, were to impress Adah. But the stupid girl refused to be impressed.
taught to be ~ery useful very early in life, and this had its ad· The number of suitors did start to dwindle, though. Maybe
vantages. For mstance, Adah learned very early to be responsible word went round that she was a peculiar girl, for she did look
~or herself. Nobody was interested in her for her own sake, only funny in those days; all head, with odd-coloured hair and a tummy
10
the money she would fetch, and the housework she could do and that would have graced any Oxfam poster. She was subsequently
Adah, ~appy at being given this opportunity of survival did not told that they stopped coming because she was cranky and ugly.
waste time th'nki
.
survive.
1
ng about its · rtohts
.
o
or -wrongs• She' had to She did not dispute that; she was ugly then, all skin and bone.
The thought of her having to leave school at the end of the year
Time went by q 'ckl
ui Y, and when she reached the age of eleven worried her so much that she lost weight. She acquired a
peop Ie started askin h h .
ThIS.
was an uroent
g ~r w en she was going
bee to leave school.' pathetically anxious look; the type some insane people have, with
ti .
est' ~ eyes as blank as contact lenses.
low·quM ion ause the fund for Boy's educa·
0
on was running
and it was consid ed . a was not happy with her new husband At about this time, something happened that showed her that
her dream was just suffering a tiny dent, just a small one, nothing
contribution to he;~ ~e ~at A~ah started making a financial
ed asif sh - - . ~ 1 y. This ternfied Adah. For a time it seem· deep enough to destroy the basic structure. The dream had by now
e must give in to save M f h .. . .. assumed an image in her mind, it seemed to take life, to breathe
she found herself in Sh h d a rom t e hum1hat1ng pos1tton
was a betrayal of p; ~ at~ Ma for marrying again, thinking it and to smile kindly at her. The smile of the Presence became wide
as the headmaster of Adah's school announced the lists of
· met,mes she dreamt of marrying early; a
18 19
 schools which the children could apply for.
available5CC:00d ary must go and to one of the very best of schools;
"You are going, you . you' re going to do well there," Adah
not only arc you go::rring her. She heard it so much that she
heard the p~:e~e headmaster's voice jolted her back to reality.
5
~~~! 0
!:t i~ it about me that you find~ funny, Adah Ofi~!"
• ? Oh no sir1 l was not laughing, I mean not smiling.
"Mc, su. , ,
sir;'~ou were not what? You mean I am lying? Well, back her
I"
~
up immediately a group of three or four tough-looking boys came
0
t from the back row and the biggest of them all swept Adah onto
h~ back and two others held her feet while the headmaster ad-
is . ~th
ministered the cane on her posterior. The searing 01" e cane was so
intense that Adah was beyond screaming. To ease the pain, she
sank her sharp teeth deep into the back of the poor boy who
was backing her. He started to scream loudly, but Adah would not
let go, not even when the caning stopped. The boy wriggled in
agony and so did Adah. All the teachers came to the rescue. Adah's
teeth had dug so deep into him that fragments of his flesh were
stuck between her teeth. She quickly spat them out and wiped her
mouth, looking at them all wide-eyed.
"You'll go to jail for this," the headmaster thundered and he
took the boy into his office for first aid. From that day on, no boy
ever volunteered to back Adah up any more, but that incident
gave her a nickname which she never lived down : the Ibo
tigress. Some qf her Yoruba classmates used to ask her what
h~man flesh tasted like, because ''You Ibos used to eat people,
didn't ~ou?" Well, Adah didn't know about the cannibalistic
tendencies of her tribe; all she knew was that the headmaster's
ca~e burnt her 50 much that she felt irrepressible urges to pass the
• hto something else. Lati'fu, the boy who was doing the back•
pain
~~~~ f:1r~nhedt toh be the cl~sest victim, so he had to take it. .Adah
5 · hed . She had been
smiling at tha p e was being unjust . ly pums
the headrnas~ rtnce, not the headmaster, and she suspected that
wanted tocan:rh newth she was telling the truth; he had simply
er, atwasall
Adah waited for da s f h. . .
coming to take h Y. _or t e Law which the headmaster said was
cided that she haedr t~th)ail. No policeman came for her, so she de-
was not deep enough . .f org~tten or that her b'1te of Latifu
e1 ter been
0
ment imprisonment. The thought nagged
20
J
her, though. It nagged her so much that ~e was tempted to com-
mit another atrocity, this time a really homble one that nearly sent
her, not to jail, but to her Maker.
Adah was given two shillings to buy a pound of st~ fro~ a
market called Sand Ground. She looked at the two-sh1lling piece
for a very, very long time. All she needed to tak~ ~e entr_an~e
examination to the school of her dreams was two shillings. D1dn t
Jesus say that one should not steal? But she was sure there was a
place in the Bible where it said that one could be as dev~r as the
serpent but as harmless as the dove. W~uld_ she be h~~ any·
body if she paid for her entrance exammatt~n f ~ with this. two
shillings? Would Jesus condemn her for doing 1t: for stealing?
After all, her cousin could afford the money, though he would not
give it to her if she asked for it in the proper way. What was she to
do? That was the trouble with Jesus, He never answered you; He
never really gave you a sign of what to do in such a tempting situ-
ation. Anybody could twist what He said to suit his own interpreta-
tion. Then she saw the Image again. It was going to be all right,
the Image was smiling, so Adah buried the money and went back
home in tears, without the meat.
She was really no good at lying. The wildness in her eyes had a
way of betraying her. If only she could have kept her large eyes
lowered it would have been all right : people would have believed
her story. But she kept staring into their eyes, and her face showed
her up like a mirror.
"You're lying, Adah," her cousin's wife said, pointedly.
Adah opened her mouth, but had to close it quickly, because no
sound came. She knew what was going to happen to her; the cane.
She did not mind this caning because she knew that anybody who
sinned must be punished. What she did not bargain for was the
extent of the punishment. Her cousin sent her out with a three-
penny piece to buy the type of cane called the koboko. It was the
one the Hausas used for their horses. There was nothing Adah
could do but buy it. Her cousin warned her that he would not stop
administering the cane until she'd told him the truth. That
was bad, thought Adah. She had to go to the Methodist Girls' High
School or die. She concentrated her mind on something else. After
the burning of the first few strokes, her skin became hardened,
and so did her heart. She started to count. When Cousin Vincent
had counted to fifty, he appealed to Adah to cry a little. If only she
would cry and beg for mercy, he would let her go. But Adah would
21
 t talc the bait. She began to sec herself as another martyr; she
0
: as betng punished for what she believe~ in. Meanwhile Cousin
Vincent's anger increased; he caned her wildly, all over her body.
.After a hundred and three strokes, he told Adah that he would
never talk to her again : not in this world nor in the world to
come. Adah did not mind that. She was, in fact, very happy. She
had earned the two shillings.
The headmaster at her school did not believe his cars when Adah
told him that she was going to sit for the common entrance examina-
tion. He looked at her kwashiorkor-ridden body for a very long
time then shrugged his shoulders. "One can never tell with you
lbos. You're the greatest mystery the good God has created." So
he put her name down.
Sometimes the thought that she might not be able to pay the
fees crossed her mind. But she did not let that worry her. She had
read so~cwhere that ~ere w~ some sort of scholarship for the five
or so children who did best m the exam. She was going to com·
pete for one of those places. She was so determined that not even
th~ fact that her number was nine hundred and forty-seven
frightened her. She was going to that school, and that was that!
Bu_t ho~ was she to tell them at home? She had stopped liking
Cousin Vincent E e f
tell God tO
loving
d
PC:t~Y-
should ~~:r
sh
~ ry ime e knelt down to pray, she used to
sen him to hell. She did not believe in that stuff of
~ter all, God did not like the Devil, so why
good two hoy or.the man who had the heart to cane her for a
his Cambridg:rs~• a ko~oko? When Cousin Vincent failed
1 "A" levels, one needed a home. Not just any home where there
laughing. God had ho~rd~rtificate examinations, Adah burst out
The entrance exam. fer prayers.
~as going to be very :~•on was to take place on a Saturday. That
lie? She could not do th~l~ ~ow was she to get away? Another
they would stop her f gain. She would be discovered, and
uncIM' romtaki h . .
e, as brother th t h ng t e exammahon· so she told her
The · ' a s e was · ' •
th f unmcst thing was th going to sit for the examination.
~ money from. Nobody at nobody even asked her where she got
; ng for money from anw:~ed to know. As long as she was not
a~ay_ job, she could go io thy, and as long as she had done her
would asa~n~Uy, the mother ~ devil for all they cared !
and as_ ow she proposed t th e house, Ma's sister-in-law,
mindrema~~ her th:it her fatho get the money for the school fees
~:tas
wou flutter with fear
'
dead. In response, Adah's
she never told anyone she was
22
dreaming of winning a ,choluship. That was too big an ambitij
for a girl like her to express. . . .
She was aware that nobody was interested m her smce Pa died .
Even if she had failed, she would have accepted it as one of the
hurdles of life. But she did not fail. She not only passed the
entrance examination. But she got a scholarship with full board.
She never knew whether she came first or second or even third,
but she was one of the best children that year.
Since then she had started to be overawed by the Presence. It
existed right beside her, just like a companion. It comforted her
during the long school holidays when she could not go home, be-
cause there was no home for her to go to.
She was very happy at the Methodist Girls' School especially dur-
ing the first four years. However, a cloud of indecision started to
loom when her school days were coming to an end. It was
incredible how quickly five years could pass! She would have
liked to linger there, in the boarding house; to stretch each day into
a year and each year into a century. But that was impossible. The
final day came and she was quite unprepared for life outside. She
~ad some vague plans about what she was going to do; she was go-
mg. to ~ontinue her education, she was going to go to Ibadan
Umvers,ty to read Oassics and she was going to teach at the end of
it all.
I
Well, there was one thing she had not bargained for. To read for
a degree, to read for the entrance examination0 or even for more
would be trouble today and fights tomorrow, but a good, quiet
atmosphere where she could study in peace.
Adah could not find a home like that. In Lagos, at that time
teenagers were not allowed to live by themselves, and if the teen:
ager happened to be a girl as well, living alone would be asking
for trouble. In short, Adah had_to marry.
Francis was a very quiet young man who was reading to be an
accountant. Adah congratulated herself on her marriage. At least
he was not an old baldie, neither was he a "made man" then
though there was no doubt that he was going to be made one da '
! 0
Adah the greatest advantage was that she could go on stud;~
; : a~her ~wn pace. She &?t great satisfaction, too, from the fact
t ranas was too poor to pay the five hundred pounds
23
 bride-price Ma and the other members of her fam'l
"asking . Sh~ w~ s~ an expens~:_ b~i~ because ~e Were rotected, especially on the pay days. On the .first pay day, Ad3!1
"colle" e trained , even though none of fliem had~co t Was
. wnlnouteu-
~as to be paid about sixty pounds or so. Neither ~dab nor Fran~s
::.:.:!2. •
to her education. The anger of her people was so intense th had ever seen such a fantastic sum. It was deaded that Franas
of them came to her wedding. at none should work only a half day in his office, and ~en ~alee a bus ~o
That wedding itself was a hilarious affair. Francis and Adah meet Adah, in order to be a bodyguard for his wife and. their
the only witnes s, Francis's mother, had tov.:erc money. Both husband and wife carried the money to Tmubu
both under age, and sign
. Th . Square in Adah's work bag like a delicate baby. They talked about
with her thumb. e whole affair started off on the wrong f .. .
their plans for this sudden prosperity.
They had forgotten to buy a ring, and the skinny man with a bl: "We are ahead of all our coUeagues, you know, Frana s re-
bow tie refused to marry them, even when Adah assured him th .
a piece of string would do until they got home. at marked. c sum.
"God is wonde rful! Fancy me earnin g such a fantasb
''I've never heard of such a wedding!" the man declared Our new baby is going to be very lucky."
sweating in his tight collar. '
"If he happens to be a boy we'll call him Kennedy."
''Please marry us without a ring because, you see, before we
"And if a girl, we'll call her Jacqueline."
can get to Ebute-Metta, you will have closed for the day!" Adah There was a long pause during which the young couple eyed a
begged. man in an agbada robe suspiciously.
"Never mind about that, you just come back tomorrow with a "Some of these rogues do smell money, you know," Francis
ring and I will marry you." whispered.
Th~ were m_arried the following day. It was the saddest day in "Yes, I know," nodded Adah.
A~ah s w?ole hfe. ~he did not mind having to go home in a bus, Francis clutched the raffia bag tightly to his chest, and frowned
ne1ther did she rnmd not marrying in white, which she hated in the direction of the unsupecting man.
a_nyway, but still she was sad, very sad, for months after the rnar- "I have been thinking," Adah said, all of a sudden. "I used to
nage at the register office. dream that one day I "'.ould go to the United Kingdom. Why don't
!°ohn, however, things improved. Adah gave birth to a daughter we save and go, now that we shall be able to afford it? We can
\,~C:
1
and Francis we!e bo~ delighted with the baby.
, after endless mterv1ews and form .fillings Adah was
take our children with us. Everybody goes to the United Kingdom
now. I'll be glad if we can go too."
Iected to work
se.b l'b . m . the American, Consulate The smile on Francis's face was like a warm sunshine after a ·
as a t ranan .
LI rary at Campb 11 S
treet. The
.
s~ze of her P!Y packet womed thunderous rain. It spread from ear to ear on his beardless face.
Francis a little anl
"D ' he had •to ask •his Pa •for advJCe• He would be very happy if they could make it. He would finish
o you think O his accountancy and Adah would read librarianship. He would go
work for the Am ~r marriage w,tll last if I allow Adah to go an~ first, and Adah would send him twenty pounds every month; she
co~agues at wor~r;~~s? Her _Pay will be three ~~ ~j>wn. My was to save for her fare and that of the children, she was to feed
do?·•- --- . laugh at-me:-What do you think I sliould
herself and the children whilst they were still in Lagos and pay
"You are a fool of the rent and help in paying the school fees of some of Francis's
money to? Her pco le: man, you are. Where will she take the seven sisters.
congratulate her on~ · H~r people, who did not even come to Adah did not in the least mind being saddled with all these
did not care whether she ;rnval of baby Titi? Her relatives, who
responsibilities even though her bride-price had not been paid. It
Y~ see? let her go e ~ed or died? The money is for you, can't
1
ne_ver occurred to her to save her new high salary for her bride-
bring their money her ~ work for aI million .
Americans and
d pnce. She knew that all she did would go towards making her
agood chorce . 1n. marriae, into this ho use. t 1s your luck. You ma e
Francis was d Ii ge, son.
.. young family into a family of Ibo elites, just like Lawyer Nweze of
as e ghted lbuza, who by then had become a Minister in Northern Nigeria.
as a schoolboy. Adah would have to be
24 25
 That lawyer was a funny man, Adah thought. He did not corne t
the South, to Ibu:za, to g!ve the _poople of _the t~wn electricity:
nor did he come to worship the nver Obosh1. He Just stayed put
in the North, making barrels and barrels of money. When Adah
was still at the American Consulate news appeared in the
Nigerian papers that Lawyer Nweze was defending a Hausa
multi-millionaire. They said the millionaire was so rich that he
had a railway line built right down to his palace door. The man had
eight Rolls-Royces. After the case, Nweze ended up a miUionaire
himself. Adah stiJI wondered how that happened, because the
millionaire was jailed for forging notes in his great palace.
Francis and Adah sometimes wondered what he had paid Nweze
with.
In any case that was Nweze's headache, not Adah Obi's! As far as
she was concerned, her dreams were all coming true. Her mar-
ria~e was less than ~ighteen months old, yet she already had four
m~ds,_two were piud three pounds each, the other two were paid
their fees f~~ s~ondary schools. These two, Cecilia and Angelina,
l much joy into her husband's house and ~one mto hers. ~y~
bo t their own lives had to be referred first to ]lig Pa, Francjs's
;a~r then to his mother, then discussed amongst the br?th~~ of
th ~ ·1 6efore Adah was referred to. She found all this ndicu·
1o:s th; ~ore so jf the discussion involved finance. After all! ~he
wouid ha~e to pay for the plan in most cases but the d~s1on
would have been made behind her back. Of course Franas was
· simply a puppet in such cases, and. so was she. They could not re-
fuse They had to bow down to theu elders.
Eiders or no elders, they were going to live their own lives. It
would have been fairer if some of the elders were from her own
side of the family. But both Adah's parents wer~ dead by the~. ~a
had died, aged thirty-eight, when Adah was m hospital havmg
Titi so she felt cheated in a way.
Cheated by the fact that neither her Pa nor Ma had li~ed _to sec
any of her children; cheated by the fact that ~e was bnngmg so
visited her, neither did any of her cousms and uncles.
Adah a own. 1
1m:r
ah shoul ave contmued
felt

were Franas s sisters. These four girls did all the work in the ~ ucahon anctbecome a doctor, since she had managed to
~ouse. AJJ_Adah had to do was to go to the American library, work struggle through secondary school. But nobody talked of w~o was
~ll two-thirty, come home and be waited on hand and foot, and go~ t~~ her, nobody talked o..!._where sh:, was g?mg_.to
10
tbe ~ening be made love to. She did not disappoint her liv_e:::SO~ r ~-~~-t ~lone once ~~~~. _forced mto_ a s1tua~on
parendts-m-law on that score. For, apart from the fact that she dictated by society in which;'"a:nifi1ndiv1dual, she had little cho1~e.
earne enough mo t k She would rather that she and her husband, whom she was begin-
Jific wh • h ney O eep them all going, she was very pro-
th
have Aic ' among e lbos, is stiJJ the greatest asset a woman can ning to-love, moved-to new surroundingi;-a new country and among
· woman would be fo · h. h new people. So she-sai<l special-;prayeis to Goo, asking Hi~ to
duced children Adah rgiven everyt mg as long as s e pro·
~?
the nickname :,Touch was fast on this score that she was given make Pa agree to their going to the land of her dreams, ~e U~ted
Kingdom! Just like her Pa, she still said the name Umted King-
group. "As soon h ~t among the other wives of her age
tummy " they das er usband touches her she gets a swollen dom in a whisper, even w}:len t3:lking to God abou~ it! but now
• use to laugh. • she felr it wa_s coming nearer to her. She was begmnmg to be-
Later, in England w 'ti lieve she would gQ to England.
tf
nostalgia, she used to CJ about that time of her life almost with Francis broke the good news to her one day after their even-
ing meal. Pa had agreed, he said. Adah was so full of happiness
that sort of life cu abs. erself why she had not been content with
s ·1 b ' s ioned b th that she started to dance anAfrican cafypso. So they were going at
:po, t Y her servants and Y e love of her parents-in-Jaw,
last! She was soon going to be called "been-to", which was a
As_ for her mother-in-law r~spected by Francis's younger sisters.
Lagos phrase for those who had "been to" England. Francis al-
CJ~Iet, beautiful, and moth!r e was everything that Ma was not :
th lowed her to finish before he dropped the bomb-shell.
ink that she was Adah' ly. Some of .Adah's friends used to
suspected s real moth th h "You know how old-fashioned Father is."
h somewhere in her h er, ey were so dose. But s e Adah knew and nodded, startled by her husband's grave
t en was superficial. She d'd I
cart that the contentment she had tones.
cause as t not kno h
' mos young Africatt . w er husband very we11 be· "Father does not approve of women going to the UK. But you
. wives-know, most of the decisiens--- -
26 27
 sec, you will pay for me, and look after yourself, and within three would think before she acts. Very frw women can do that, I tell
years, I'll be bade. Father said you're earning ~ore ~an most you'."
people who have been to England. Why lose your good_job just to They both burst out laughing. •

.' ·
go and sec London? They say_it is just like Lagos." "Father was right, was he not? Francis wanted to be reassured.
11

Francis was....an .African throush and throug h. A much more Yes, your father was more right that he knew, Adah thought
civilised man w~ probably have found a better way-o f saying to
to herself. First of all Francis must go, then she would get down
her
thisfcinis wife. But l9 him, he was the male, ana-he-wa.s right to work on her in-laws, and work on them very hard until they let
tell her what she was goins to do. Adah, from the day of her 80
registry marriage, had seen the romantic side of her life being i>1aos for Fcancis's departure were soon under way. He got to-
a
shattered, like broken slass, about her. Francis had had a very ex- gether everything he needed in no time at all. It cost Adah
h.
throug
pensive education at Hussey College in Warri, but his outlook on small fortune though, bcca!;!!e_it was briber y all. the way
life was pure African. He had ha.fl little opportunity of corofng.in To get a passport in those dayf, ..one ,traa to bribe even the mes·
contact with Europeans as Adah had. Those God-forsaken mis- senger at the passport office. Curiously enough, the office was
sionaries I They ha~ taught Adah all _ th: niceties of life, they - manned by policemen. Even the man at the top, whose fee w:15
taug~t h_er by the Bible, where a-wom an was supposed to be ready twenty pounds, was a policeman. Al_l his subordi~~t~ were paid
to ~ve in to her man at any time, and she was to be much more five pounds each. Frar.cis and Adah hved on Franas s income, and
prcaous to h~r husband than rubies. It was all right for a man who spent all Adah's on the preparation for his departure.
had seen rubies before and knew their worth. What of a man who The night before he left Nigeria, Francis took a group photo•
would throw rubies away, thinking that they were useless stones
? graph with his' family and Adah's little girl. Ad~ refu_sed to ~se
What was she ~to d_o now? ~ry? It was too late. Who were these for the photograph. She did not know why, but Ju.st d1_d not w1Sh
~ le an ~ . Ill1tc~ tc E!.,f~t; who thou8~ ~ ~ew a great to appear in it. Maybe it was because she was too big with the n~
h S e was not soing to child, but she knew the photographer could have ~leverly dis·
::10-gof~P.ahcunohu~,-dktn ! P.b.il9~02_hy_Qy_whic
ere."'I:"'I-rcn· ,acre was no point
u.• ---- · m · arunm · g with - ---
~ - Franc is•- guised that! A relative of theirs came to make a s ccial
there was no nc:ca to k h. h0 h o-
the river Oboshi. ome pieces o anut were brought .by
not understand "Beas im ~ e thought he was. He just would
a .ft'btt:is.s.Jiliidicr,rand thesc..w.ece.lu.okc:a.by.ih~ielat1ve;.:rht:n::
:th.~
dove " h 0 ·ed as cunnmg as a serpent but as harmless as were thrown into a circle on the floor, drawn with a cha"71 A long
ia, financ e
her hu:b ~j ~ve t~ _herself. So she w~ to stay in Niger phyer was sung to the goddess, who Was four hund!.cl m ~ aw~
in paying the schoot"lar~nts expensive gifts occasionally, help in lbu!r.'.§_ne::_w!S_ r~q,ucs l!._d_~ ~e. Francis,. ~~.kC ! ~~§~ -
_
young children and wh7thor some of the girls, look after her "the evu eye of white girls, to make him pass his examl. {1atio_
dream had led her Sh a en, rot? So this was where her great :-. tune
g0vd · 15 s cnlm
toles c ·wit ·'h -11 .:--.Q.l"V
a •u1eJ!!Q :; ,._in E~glan a to
" 'r:J..,. 01ess
_____ , __
s.
It was too late now· no: should have married, one of the baldie him w'ith. every thi~g~ti;;z ;~_g9.o_d .J¥t1 8!.~~ ~~e was
rc-
to do was to chang~ the ~~n ~ baldy would have her. All she had
q~ especially 1o forget him when circula ting .~1seas es ~nd
do. She pretended to be s;l rion, and that she was determined
in Lagos and look after ~e f~~e - plan. Of course she would
to
stay anyth
d Ad:1:
·se~
.ing plaguey. Th'11!s ~c~o.n~'f u~ ~an~. ~I:~=::::~~~;-
Was b ons1ble
for the- hves of peop e in England too? she wonde ~~ n .~Y
money regularly and • 1·f rrv,, 'bl Y, of course she would send him
51 case;-aH:h:e~ ruLof:it-~H;:they:were--.alberder~~u>~itf fie pieces
qf
F · - emov · · r-in-law.
rancu was not to worry abo t' h e in with her mothe was going kolanut, which they munched with. gr~at __~atlsfa_ ch~n:.
er at all, everyt hing
to ~ork out well. u That was· the trouble with being a ·believer m all these trans-
My father toJd me I mad . cendent Beings. One did not know when one aroused the anger
a:igh t decision the day I said I was ut:
going_ to marry you. You kno~ of one or the other. For instance, did their chewing of the k~lan 0
He said to me, 'Adah trained hers~l~t he told me? No? I'll tell you. offered to Oboshi automatically make them the enemi es
common sense guide her Sh e has the . She learnt very early to Jet her Jehovah?
· male'
ings of a woman who
28 29
 w:

Well, Adah debated with herself, Oboshi being such a . e wanted them to fl.ow at the airport so that when Fran?s
oddess might be able to protect them from the wrath f wne. Sh 'lite be would remember that poor .Adah wept for him
powerful g But Adah's bemg . Ch . . 1· d
a nsttan comp icate the issue all
o
t,ecamehan eh ' a nobody Well those tears did come, but at
th
oerg Didn'tods • Ch'' h even w en e was . ! .
e the God of the nst1ans, w om Adah belicv-.1 . e She watched Franos bid everybody goodbye, dry-
the~. . l G ~ theedwrong tun · · · 1.ew·is Carro 11' s
. tell Moses somewhere that he was a Jea ous od "visiting the All his sisters were like that Alice m
~n'. •ty of fathers upon the children unto the third and fourth e'f • · away like mad. He would remember them when
·
miqw
generation of them that hate me"~. at
Th God wouId hat~ them for fant.asy, weeping elite with strings and stnngs · of qua1I·fications.
he came back an • I' ·
chewing those pieces of kolanut, .Adah was sure. Nothing would He will forget me and my child, and the other one m gomg to
deaden her guilty conscience; not even the fact that her mother- · three weeks' time, Adah thought as she stood there, away
havem . di · d d
in-law who was a devout Catholic, bought the kolanuts, nor the from the clan, just like an outcast. Francis was sappomte an
fact that she was munching away happily herself. Adah looked at showed it, but be gave her a pat on the shoulder. Poo_r Adah, her
Francis, who carried the Bible every weekend, telling people the heart ached for the departure of the only human bemg she was
"good news of the kingdom" from a twopenny magazine called just beginning to underst~d, j~st lcar_ning to car_e for. Maybe the
the Watchtower. Well, it was all right for her mother-in-law- separation was too early m theu mamage~ she d1~ n_ot know. But
she would quickly go to the padre, who lived round the corner at what she did know was that there was this ache ms1de her heart,
St Paul's church and confess it all to him. The padre would then too heavy for tears, too heavy for words. She simply stared at them
give her absolution. That would free her conscience to sin again if all.
she liked. As for Francis, he became a Jehovah's WitnC$ when- Everybody's name was being called, and all the passengers stood
ever he felt like it, or when he could use it as an excuse for being one at a time, at·the plane's door, waved the final goodbye to their
selfish. When .Adah was ill with their first baby, Francis had given folks and then disappeared into the bowels of the whale-like
his blood to save her life, forgetting that the Witnesses were not monster they called the aeroplane. Adah had never seen an aero-
sup~sed to do that. When he was busy with bis preparation for plane at such a close range. Why, thq were bigger than buses! she
commg to England, he forgot his W aJchtower and Awake. He also thougnC11ie. air liostess was smiling unnaturally and·waving two
forgot that coming to England was seeking after materialism which hands instead of one like everybody else. Why was that? Adah
he preached to Adah was not only evil but unnecessary, because wondered. Then the door was cruelly slammed shut. The slam·
Armageddon was round the corner. It was all right for them, ming of that door, the finality of it all, reminded her of some·
but she did not know whom to turn to herself. There was no thing she had seen before. She had seen it all before, this cruel
P adre she could confess to in the church she attended. She be- finality. The other person who was shut away from her like that
1
onged to the Ch ch f . . never came back. Where did it happen before? She searched her
Walchtowe, and Aurak o . England. Th"" -,
had nothmg hke
memory as she stood in that scorching Nigerian sun. Then her
tion· th 1 f ~ '• neither had thq any system of absolu·
, cy e t a gwlty pc 'th . mother-in-law moved towards her. Adah did not know what it was
a minute, she told her r~n. wi a nasty conscie~ce. But wait
should give unt Ca self, didn t Jesus say to the Phansees that one that drew that woman towards her in that burning sun. She
His? Well th to esar what was Caesar's and to God what was touched Adah's unfeeling arm, and said in a choked voice: "It
a wasrt what · She could quote the
the'f were domg. looks like a coffin." Adah turned round, saw her, and started to
Holy Book'to supp 0
. howl.
it, There was nothing to worry about.
The whole fam1·1y turned out t . It all came back to her now. It was Pa who was nailed down
. O wish Francis a safe journq at the into ~e bo~els of a smallei whale, because be was going to be the
ll~rt at Ikeja, When h
wives were all supposed usbands left their wives for the UK the only inhabitant of that one. This one was bigger, but it had the
the night before to se d to cry from love. Adah prayed to God s~e aura ~f finality. "Please God it won't happen again. He is
1aw Th n enough t • · ~in~ to arrive there safely. Please God, let nothing bad happen to
· ose tears of hers had a ears to impress her parents-in· him, she cried.
way of coming down at the wrong
30 31
 The relatives wiped their. eyes and stared at Adah. ,,m__ t
. d . th wna Was
the matter with her? Waves cne an e presence of th .
departing husbands, not when they had gone and could CU
see the tears! No one said anything. Afte~ all, she was go~ot
to provide the cash, so she was allowed a little eccentricity.
fact that someone so young could earn so much as Adah
Th!
. . they sai'd. was
enough to drive her to extrem1t1es,
Francis wrote from Barcelona and then from London. "Y:
did not cry for me," he accused Adah in his letters. "You we:~
very happy to see me go, were you not? Was that why you did not
wish to appear in my send-off photograph? You did not care for
me."
Now, with what type of soap was Adah to wash herself clean
of this dirty accusation? How was she to write to Francis and say
"I cried for you. No, I even howled like a mad Zulu woman a~
the airport because the door of the plane reminded me of my Pa's
coffin"? He would think she was mad. So Adah decided against
it. She simply let sleeping dogs lie. She sent him money regularly,
bore him another child, this time a son, went back to work twelve
days afterwards, having had only three weeks' annual leave. There
was no provision for maternity leave at the American Consulate
~en. But the s~aff had a big party for her, all American, all very
nch and very mce. They knew what Adah was going through, but
they were diplomats, not missionaries or social workers.
A few m~nths afterwards Francis sent his wife and parents the
~:sults ~f his Part I examination. He had passed. So, for Adah,
1 was time to act, or
she never would go to the land of her dreams.
't She was so happy about Francis's success that she babbled about
:r•
I to_re~body. She was not too surprised about this early success,
erm~ that he had taken this same exam four times in Lagos
ore going to the UK. There were still the second and third
parts
four Oand' thefiway .Adah calculated 1t, . Francis
. would
stay another
his w~:en tov~ear~. In one of his letters, he even mentioned
What was ~he su acticled. Th~t would take five years at least.
asked Francis th' pposed to do tn the meantime? ·She wrote and
like her to come\~~ was shocked t~ read from him that he would
she did not care 'wu ;m her behaviour at the airport he was sure
11
She went to F.cane .' , at was all she needed.
CIS s moth
women who had b er, appealed to her to look at all the
all drove their own:0 rs.
to England, pointing out the fact that they
3i
"Think of it, Ma - Francis in his big American car and I in my
mall one coming to visit you and Pa when you retire. You' 11 be
~e envy ~f all your friends . Mind you, in England I'll work and
till send you money. All you have to do is to ask, and then you'll
~et whatever you want. ':11 the g!rls ':"ill g_o to secondary schoo_l.
I've almost finished reading for ltbranansh1p. All I have to do 1s
to work look after Francis and attend classes in the evening. And
when I ~ome back, I shall earn more than double what I'm earning
now."
Adah won over her mother-iti-law. If going to England meant
her earning more than she was earning now, and riding a car as
well, than she was all for it. Pa was still doubtful. He had suf-
fered from unemployment when he was a young man and knew
that the type of job Adah had then did not grow on trees.
"My going to England would be regarded as leave without
pay."
That softened Pa.
The next problem was the children. Her mother-in-law sensed
that if Adah took her two babies, she might never send the money
she promised. Adah had a good solution for that. She was very
fond of jewellery and had invested a small part of her income in
this. She had several necklaces for her little girl and herself. She
gave them all to her mother-in-law.
"You take them; in England we shan't need them. And when I
come back, I shan't be wearing gold any more," Adah boasted with
a faked smile on her face, whilst her heart sent her mother-in-law
to her Maker. She never asked Adah what she would be wearing
when she came back from England. Diamonds maybe. Mother-in-
law was shocked all right and, before she could recover, Adah had
had her kids immunised and paid for a first-class passage by boat
for the three of them. She was completely deaf to the warnings
that she was paying over two hundred pounds more than was
necessary for their passage to England. She was told to wait an-
other six months and she would get cheaper accommodation in the
cabin-class. Six months was too long a time to wait. Mother-in-
law would change her mind.
She was still not completely sure that her dream was coming
true until she was on the deck of the Oriel, Vicky in her arms
and Titi holding onto her skirt. It was then she saw her brother,
Boy, in a brown African robe that was too big for him, crying
and wiping his eyes with a velvet hat. Adah did not cry for the
33
 her. But
in-laws, and funnily enough they did not cry for
was that a ~emb er of her own fatnil
all she needed to know
Boy wa~ like Pa . an? Ma mout dJ
was there, missing her.
all into one, standing there. She cned too, this time not a howJ 3
of Jeav:
not an empty show, but tears of real sorro w at the thought
e Pa was burie d and wher
ing the land of her birth. The
Ma Jay, quiet forever. Only she and
land wher
~oy remai ned of that lif;
again.
A Cold Welcome
which she had known. It was never gomg to be the same
or for worse , but they
Things were bound to change, for better the ship.
would never be the same. There was a sudden burst of excitement on the deck of
cabin,
Boy was now aJJ alone. He had to work very hard to keep
the .Adah could hear it from where she was sitting in her
had becom e For a mom ent she stopp ed ~hat she was
family name going. Adah had dropp ed out of it. She changing Vicky's napkin.
ed this, to make out what the exate m~t ~as
an Obi instead of the Ofili she used to be. Boy had resent doing, straining her ears
ng coher ent. There were voices Jab-
the fact about, but she could hear nothi
but his presence at the whar f show ed that he had accepted were
that in Africa, and among the lbos in partic ular, a girl
was little bering loudly, somebody laughed hysterically, and there
more than a piece of property. Adah had been bough t, thoug h on sounds of someone runni ng as if chased by demons.
gh the
credit, and she would never go back to being an OfiJi any more. What could it be? wondered Adah , as she hurrie d throu
was a fire, or an accide nt, or could it be
big man diaper routine. Perhaps it
The tiny hands dutch ing her blouse were the hand s of a She knew they would be in Liver pool in
now on her that they were drow ning?
in the making. Her duty was to them now. From rushi ng for? She was unabl e to bear
him a day or two, but what was the
children came Jirst. All she could do for Boy was to make on and ran
of. She the suspense any longe r so she quickly slippe d a dress
a~are that he had a sister be bad every reason to be proud
a millio naire but she woul d come back with out onto the deck.
might not come back , she
pride. ' _ She had forgo tten that they had passed the Bay of Biscay
was Marc h.
ce be- had forgotten that they were now in Europ e and that it
~ dah wiped her eyes and waved to her broth er, the distan on the deck
becam e like a small The cold wind that blew on her face as she emerged
tween them lengthening so much that he soon ran back.
was as heavy and hurtf ul as a blow from a boxer. She
black comma and then he was gone. s. Then
were with her arms folded across her chest, to get more clothe
. There w~ no time to wallow in self-pity. All aroun d her she ran to the ship's nurse . The nurse had a fat face, small eyes
rives ! 0
diplomats and top white civil serva nts going d
. f
home o.a
. there , in that first- ass sec-
Bemg and a fat body. She was all smile s when she saw Adah and her
eave. Life dwas chan . gmg ast.
tion eyes were lost in creases.
' aseeme to give her a taste of what was to come. God would "Hav e you seen it?" she burbl ed. "Hav e you seen Liver
pool?
helP oy as He h d h 1 d
and relaxed 1 . a. e pe her. She gave her child ren to
the nurse, We'v e arrive d
It's too early and a bit dark, but we are in Liverpool.
achieving. Hj s ruce to ~ treated like an elite, a status they were
and
in Engla nd ! "
Works accouat not Francis passed his first exam inatio n in
Cost shive r-
Adah opene d her eyes wide and closed them again, still
to dom.
England? Sh:~: ':;..were not she and her child ren on their way ing. So they had arrive d. She had arrive d in the Unite d King
d go to to her dead
English schools and /he :'as dete~ ined that they woul Pa, I'm in the United Kingdom, her heart sang
. She remembered' ~h~~sSibJe, English universities. father.
very The nurse stared at her for a secon d, then dashe d
past her,
night before. "We shall she had told her moth er-in- law the
st The poor
wom~n had believed her°nly ay a ye~r and six mont hs." anxious to sprea d the good news.
Be as Adah put on the woollies which she boug ht at Las Palin
as. Then
cunning as a serpent a d · That was life, she said to herse lf.
n as harmless as a dove. she ran out on to the deck.
35
34
England gave Adah a cold welcome. The welcome was arf
1 oess seemed to say to her: "It is allowed f~r _African males to come
cold because only a few days previously they had bee~ ~~0 8:?ly
· and get civilised in England. But that prmlege has not been ex-
bright and cheerfu l welcomes from ports like Takorad ' F J Yltlg
and Las Palmas. If Adah had been Jesus, she would ~• reetown
England by. Liverpool was grey, smoky and looked uni~: .P~
humans. It reminded Adah of the loco-yard where they t~:d by
Pa had once worked as a moulder. In fact the architect!cr
designs.were the same. But if, _as peopl~ said,.there ~as plCt}ty ~
money m England, why then did the natives give theu visitor ~
poor cold welco~e? Well, it was too late to moan, it was ~t~!
to change her mmd. She could not have changed it even if she h d
wanted to. Her children must have an English education and, f~r
~at reason, she was prepared to bear the coldest welcome, even if
1t came from the land of-her dreams. She was a little bit dfsap- -
pointed, but she told herself not to worry. If people like Lawyer -
Nweze and others could survive it, so could she.
The Francis that came to meet them was a new Francis. There
was something very, very different about him. Adah was stunned
when he kissed her in public, with everybody looking. Oh, my
God, she thought ; if her mother-in-law could see them, she would
go and make sacrifices to Oboshi for forgiveness. Francis was de-
lighted with Vicky.
"Just my image, I can now die in peace!"
"Wh~t do you mean, die in peace?" Adah challenged.
_Francis laughed . "In England, people make jokes of every·
thing, even things as serious as death. People stiJl laugh about
them."
_"Yes?" Adah was beginning to be scared. She looked round her
wildly.
There were hundreds of people rushing around clutching their
luggage, and pulling their children but it was not as noisy asd"dit
'
• Lagos.
been had they been m • she saw I__
not 1 have
would . The whites
Th ~k hke people who could make jokes about things likeJl~ th ·
ke?p tho~kedd_ remote, happy in an aloof-way' but determined -
to
cir 1stance
"These people d •t Iook as if they know how to joke. You•re
lying Fra • y on · ke
· all up. English people doo•t JO
• nos. ou' re maki ng it
about death."
h ill
"This separation of
your life told me that i°urs ~ made you bold. You've n~er
Adah was quiet d bwas lying before," Francis accused.
ene Y the sharpness in his voice. The sharp-
36
tended to females yet." She would have liked to protest about it
from the very beginning, but what was the point of their quarrel-
ling on the very first d~y _of _their meeting after such a J?ng
separation? It was a sad mdJCation, though, of what was commg,
but she prayed th~t the tv:ro of ~em ~ould be st~ong cn~gh to
accept civilisation mto their relationsh~p. B_ecause if they did not,
their coming would have been a very big rrustake.
After the tedious check by the immigration officers, they
shivered themselves into the train. It sped on and on for hours.
For the first time Adah saw real snow. It all looked so beautiful
after the greyness of Liverpool. It was as if there were beautiful
white clouds on the ground. She saw the factory where Ovaltine
was made. Somehow that factory, standing there isolated, dean and
red against the snowy background, lightened her spirit. She was
in England at last. She was beginning to feel like Dick Whitting·
ton!
Frands had told her in his Jetter that he had accommodation for
them in London. He did not warn Adah what it was like. The
shock of it all nearly drove her crazy.
The house was grey with green windows. She could not tell
where the house began and where it ended, because it was joined
to other houses in the street. She had never seen houses like that
before, joined together like that. In Lagos-houses were usually
completely detached with the yards on both sides, the compound at
the back and verandas in front. These -ones had none of those
things. They were long solid blocks, with doors opening into the
street. The windows were arranged in straight rows along the
streets. On looking round, Adah noticed that one could tell
which windows belonged to which door by the colour the frames
were painted. Most of the houses seemed to have the same curtains
for their windows.
"They all look like churches, you know; monasteries," Adah
remarked.
"They build their houses like that here because land is not as
plentiful as it is in Lagos. I am sure that builders of the future
~ill start building our houses like that when Nigeria is fully
industrialised. At the moment we can afford to waste land in build·
ing spacious verandas and back yards."
"We may never be as bad as this. Jammed against each other."
37
 Francis did not make any comment. ~ere was no need. He
opened the door into what looked to Adah like a tunnel. But it "as
a hall; a hall with Bowere~ walls! It was narrow and it SCClncd
at first as if there were no windows. Adah clutched at Titi and sh
in turn held her mother in fear. They climbed stairs u~n stai~-
until they seemed to be approaching the roof of the house. Then
Francis opened one door and showed them into a room, or a half.
room. It was very small, with a single bed at one end and a new
settee which Francis had bought with the money Adah sent him to
buy her a top coat with. The space between the settee and the bed
was just enough for a formica-topped table, the type she had had
in the kitchen in Lagos.
"Are we going to Jive here?" she managed to ask.
"Well, I know you will not like it, but this is the best I can do.
You see, accommodation is very short in London, especially Jor
blJ1._c k-people with children. Everybody is co_rning to ~n~on:11ie ~
West Indians, the Pakistanis and even the Indians, so that .African
students are usually grouped together with them. We are all 6lacks,
all coloureds, and the only houses we can get are horrors like
these."
Well, what could she say? She simply stared. She said nothinj
ev~n when she learned that the toilet was outside four Bights of
sta1rs down, in the yard; nor when she learned that there was no
ba~: and no ki_tchen. She sw~llowed i,t_all, just like. a nasty pill._
th e evenmg, the other tenants returned from the fact9ries
where th ey worked. They all came to welcome her. Then, to her
~rro~, she saw that she had to share the house with such
,genans who called her madam at home· some of them were of
th e same d · ' - second-class."
she had :aucattonal. backgr?und as her paid servants. S~~ ~
a terrible chtldhood, but still in Nigena, .class
dl.st,·nct'ions dwere b · · • · h
wailed inward! h eginnmg to be established. Oh, Franc11, s e
have friends !i, 0
°t~ could you have done this lo 11s? Aft~r,1111 ";
sti/1 /iveapartfro 'th~ugh they may be living in s/11ms like 1~
111
"Y m IS type of people
ou could have tried F . · Ek
when he knew that h. ' . ranas. Look at your friend, Mr ,, e -
made sure he moved IS wre was_ coming with their daughter, be
"Sorry, but I was a:yb rom th1 s lot,'' she said aloud.
self, you don't have t . usy._ It's not bad, you can keep to your·
look after, you don't ho mix witb them. You have your children to
"Y . ave to see them,"
ou make ,t all sound . ,
so easy - 'I don't have to see thefll ·
38
You forget I have young children, and they will bring me into
contact with the neighbours. You should have thought of that be-
fore. Have you no shame at all or have you lost your sense of shame
in this God-forsaken country? Oh, I wish I had not come. I wish
I had been warned. I wish ..."
"Why don't you stop wishing and face reality? It is too late
now. We just have to make the best of the situation. I shouldn't
start moaning, if I were you."
"Don't talk to me. I don't want to hear. You could have got
better accommodation if you had really tried. But you didn't try
hard enough," Adah yelled.
Frands's temper snapped. He lifted his hand as if to slap her,
, · but thought better of it. There would be plenty of time for that, if
Adah was going to start telling him what to do. This scared Adah a
little. He would not have dreamt of hitting her at home because
his mother and father would not have allowed it. To them, Adah
was like the goose that laid the golden eggs. It seemed that in
England, Francis didn't care whether she laid the golden egg or
not. He was free at last from his parents, he was free to do what
he liked, and not even hundreds of Adahs were going to
curtail that new freedom. The ugly glare he gave Adah made that
clear.
Then h: spat out in anger: "You must know, my dear young J
lady, ~at m Lagos you may be a million publicity officers for the •J
.Amertcans; you may be earning a million pounds a day; you may ( (fi
have hundreds of servants: you may be living like an elite but{ ·
~~e.day_yo~ l~nd in England, you are a second-class citizen. S~ you
n t d1scnmmate against your own people, because we are all
He st?pped · to see the effect of his warning. He was happy to
s~e that tt had made an impression. Adah sat crumpled on the edge
~h the new settee, just like the dying Ayesha in Rider Haggard's
1
e.
F Id h went on, enJoymg
sh rands · · the rhythm of his voice. That man
ou ave been an actor, Adah thought.
be He laughed. A joyless sort of laugh, dry and empty. "I remem-
w:it:\a~ne of your Old Girls' Association meetings where that
Y ···yes, I remember, she was from Oxford wasn't she)
- I remember h · ' ·
backgr d h er telJmg you all that young women with your
Well~und sroul~ never in all your lives talk to bus conductors.
' Y ar mg, m England the middle-class black is the one that
39
is lucky enough to get the post of bus conductor. So you'd bet
start respecting them." - ~
At first Adah thought Francis hated her. This was his fi t
portunity of showing her what he was really like. Had she :adop-
mistake i~ rus?ing_into this ~~rriage? But she had needed a ho~e~
~nd th~ Ul},:Jltg~~hon authontie~ wer~ ,maki~g j~ v~zy_difficult for
single guls to _come to England. You were allowed only-as long as
you were commg to join a husband who was alieacJr"there. It was
very bad, sad in fact. But even if she had nothing to thank Francis
for, she could still thank him for making it possible for her to comb
to England, for giving her her own children, because she had.never ....
r~lly had anything of her own before.
!hey made it up that night, forgetting, in their intense disap-
pointment and loneliness which was fast descending upon them
lik~ a gloomy clou~, that they were not supposed to have more
children for some time. Adah did remember in the confusion that
her nickname at home was "Touch Not" . But how could she pro-
te5t to a man who was past reasoning? The whole process was an
attack, as savage as that of any animal.
At ~he end of it all, Francis gasped and said, "Tomorrow you
are go~ng to see a doctor, I want them to see to this frigidity. I am
not going to have it."
Wh. den, days later, Adah discovered what frigidity meant, she
rea11se that F • h . way when Titi was barely two and Vicky nine months old; not
rancis ad become sophisticated in many things.
She kept all this tO h If . . · when the two children were not yet out of nappies? Oh, God,
with Fr . h erse , though. There was no pomt m arguffl8
anc1s· e w ah b d
seen at L ' ' as as remote as the English people Ad a
in whichiverpool. And the house where they now lived was a place
What :::r::'~e°ot have a good family ding-dong i~ pea~~-
Francis had b r most was the description "second-class__:
only living u;~m~ : con~itioned by this phrase that he was 0
to get a job ino it h~t enioying it, too. He kept pressing Ad
! riage was sex and lots of it, nothing more. The doctor was very
factory was the la~ t~_irt factory. Adah refused: WorlWigJll a
"O" and "A" lev mg she would do. After all, she had"'several
Association Profe ~ls and she had part of the British Library .
ss1onal Ce ffi ·- . ert·
ence. Why should h r I cate, to say nothing of the exp
. J . s e go and k . ..h Vlere
Just earning to join th . wor with her neighbours w o ~ ,~.
Some of them could ettr 1etters together instead ·ofp-iiritinf fhtl11•
• a colloquial
becoming no even speak any English even though 1·t was
I
peop~e were Yorubas :~guage for most Ibos. To cap it all, th~1
.~
take Joy in belittling :uiyt~·trpe of illiterate Yoruba wh? VIOU
•ng Ibo. But Francis mixed with tbetll
-40
_J
very well, and they were pushing him _to force h~r to tak::tb~
type
of job considered suitable for housew1ves, espeaally black liouse-
wives.
This was all too much for Adah, and she recoiled into her shell,
telling it all, as the Protestant hymn book says, "to God in
prayers".
But, as usual, God had a funny way of answering people's
prayers. An envelope arrived one morning telling her that she had
been accepted as a senior library assistant at North Finch!~
Library subject to certain conditions. She was so happy about this
that she ran into the backyard where she hung out the babies'
- nappies and started ·to whirl round and round in a kind of Ibo
dance. S!le was forced to stop suddenly because she was dizzy. She
was unweU. She was, in fact, feeling sick.
Then she remembered that .first night. Oh, God help her, what
was she going to do? Tell Francis in his present mood? He would
kill her. He had started accusing her of aJl sorts of things. He had
told her that he married her in the first place because she could
work harder than most girls of her age and because she was
orphaned very early in life. But since she had arrived in England,
she had grown too proud to work.
. The news of the new job would have cheered him up, but not if
it was coupled with the knowledge that another child was on the
what was she going to do? Francis would say she had invented the
pregnancy to avoid work. Had he not taken her to see a female
gynaecologist the very next day because, as he said, no marriage
s~cceeds without a good sex life? .As far as he was concerned, mar-
sympatbetic towards .Adah and guessed that she was frightened of
another child. She was sent home equipped with aJl sorts of gad-
gets to prevent a baby that was already sitting there prettily. Oh,
yes, Bubu was determined to come into the world, and nobody
~~ ~ble to st?p him even though he chose a very unorthodox way
~eltng so, nine months later. Meanwhile his mother went through
sta~dt felt v_ery ill, but kept it quiet. Francis was dissatisfied and
qu;t e h shopping around outside for willing women. .Adah was
Wou~d happy about this; she even encouraged him. At least she
ave some peaceful nights.
-41

As she expected, Francis blamed her for
she would Jose the job because there was
tion. Adah W6.S scared about this, but she
that job.
She put on h~r ~t skirt and blouse, the
from St Michael s m Lagos. She had not
clothes since she arrived in England as
brought with her went ?n food. ~rands wo his progress. Well,
studying and he said this would mterfer
she put on this outfit, feeling great. Sh_e had
for a very long time. Apart from making
and blouse covered the gentle bulge that was
ing the third child, it showed early.
She stopped panicking when she saw that
and an old man at that. There was a
though, a scribe or something, for she held
on a chair, as stiff as dry twigs. Adah igno
to work on the old doctor. She beamed at
even wanted to Birt with him. In short, the
and forgot to look at Adah's belJy-button
stripped to the waist.
She got the job. Only God Almighty kne
the poor doctor, especialJy as it was dea
that she was pregnant and she enquired
Adah was sorry for him, but what cou
she had not got that job her marriage wou
that would have been very difficult because
. her way about._ The fact that she was still
st0Pped _Franas from walking out on her. As before, her pay
bound him to her but the difference was that
She had had to travel all the way from
h
. • and to discover anot er very weak pom disappaint ht1f!•
that oui:
Franas, she wanted him to make good, she
ing a fool
So, ~rry th ough she was for mak
~ Jus~one of those cases where honesty wou
po1icy.
42
the baby, and was su
to be a medicaJ exanun:
was determined to get 4
set she had bought
been able to buy Illy
all the money she had
The Dai!J Minders
~d n?t work as he was
e with was almost three months
not really dressed ':'P .Adah started work on the first of June. It
She was so proud of her
her feel good, the skirt since she arrived in the United Kingdom.
e morning that she found
job and so happy on this particular Jun
already forming. Be- the faces of her fellow
beauty in everything. She saw beauty on
the churning groans of
passengers and heard beautiful sounds from
the doctor was a man,
the speeding underground train.
woman sitting by him, because it had been a
Spring had come very late that year,
a pen and paper and sat was June, the freshness in
long and bitter winter, and although it
red the latter and set the air was like that of the first day of Apr
il.
from its underground
him, charmed him and train eme rged
At Finchley Central, the
its hole. Adah let down
doctor got carried away tunnel into the open air like a snake from
, watery air. It had rained
, even though she was the window and breathed in the cool, pure
ywhere.
the night before and there was wetness ever
w what happened to y houses, gardens with
She saw the back gardens of many, man
r from the .first month profusion : lupins and
flow~rs of m~ny varieties growing in mbines. The wonderful
about maternity leave. peonies, delphm1ums, sweet peas and colu
garden paths gave a tidy
ld she have done? U glow of aly!;sum on the verges of many
ch seemed to cover the
ld have broken up, and edge to the carpet of green grass whi
ceasing to look like the
she did not yet )cnow ground. 1?e trees_ ~ad burst into green,
they had reminded Adah
laying the golden eggs naked, dned-up, Juiceless old women
of when she first landed in England.
she now knew it. st and full of juice.
nd Now, e~erything was young, dean, moi
Lag os to London to .6 kly taken under the win g of the chief
rt At _the library, she was quicexp
. t: she carGU .
_.J for losive in her welcome and very,
brari~n. She was a Czech,
with wide hips a wide
hated to very friendly. Mrs Konrad was a wide lady' '
of an old doctor, tbiS · a .flattened 0. She had iine Jines around her
waist, an d a f ace like
smiled which was most
ld not have been tbe eyes, and these lines deepened when she
e displ~ying her creamy•
of the time. Even her smiles were wid •
even teeth.
up Her brown hair was
She seemed to have littl' e time for make . .
Ccopped 1· t l'k before the amval of Jesus
f h. • us I e a man s used to be s at the back of her head
as •on. She left a handful of bulbous curl
43
 of collaps1n . g happy that her
and another at the front; the latter had a funn y . way Adah was happy she'd got a first-class job; she was
back . she was enjoying
onto her forehead, and she was foreve r push mg
them colleagues at work liked her, she was happ y that
place . The curls at the back just staye d there untnto
their right ful the work.
ter. per.
turbed, even when Mrs Konr ad shoo k with laugh
the part of the
Her skirts were always gathe red and home -mad
e. She WO It was all right for her, being a first-class citizen for
n gathe red ones in s~~ _ day when she worked in a clean, centrally heated librar
y, but what
woollen gathered ones in winte r and cotto after them ? Since it
mer. She was untouched by any passi ng fasliio~. -Con
ie tight skfri s - about her children? Who was going to look
is did agree to look
always 1¥<>re h~- was nearing the end of the summer term, Franc
wide skirts, ~ome m~dis, minis, m~i s, Mrs Konr ad that she had _got
blouses, gave after them temporarily. Whil e it was still news
gathered skirts. This, together with unus ually tight lass citize n's job, ',
- herself employed in a library, doing a first-c
her the look of an overblown balle t danc er. soon her job
youn g with long, skinny Francis was prepared to look after their children, but
The other girls were assistants, very was no longer news. Everybody accepted it with a sniff.
Adah . Unlike 'their
legs; most of them seemed to be all legs to "Wh o is going to look after your child ren for you?
" Francis
made Adah feel
superior, they were all fashion-conscious. They asked one day when she was tucki ng the babies into
their settee
liar with them. -
o~ 9f place, so she never really becam e too fami bed. "I can't go on doing it; you'll have to look for some
one. I can't
They made her feel infer ior some how, always
talki ng ol 6oy
to join in, for she was go on looking after your children for you."
friends and clothes. Adah woul d· have liked ised that
th she would Adah spun round, aghast. She was not really surpr
the same age, but she knew that if she open ed her mou Francis said this, she had know n it was comi ng; but what she hadn 't
iage was not a
sound bitter. She woul d have told them that marr realised was the resentment over the children which
was accumulat-
. Oh, yes, she r when he re-
bed of roses but a tunne l of thorns, fire and hot nails ing in Francis. She could sense the suppr essed ange
she asked her· ria, _w.b~o..
would have told them all sorts of thing s. But why, fe~red to them as "her" child ren, not "thei rs". In Nig_e
dream s? So she preferred, to they took after him,
self, must she spoil other peop le's chddren were good, they were the father's,
takin g after her
listen and smile noncommittally. but when they were bad, they were the mother's,
sat down, and
_Soon she settled down to work. She hard ly ever and her old mother. Adah was frigh tened . .
the people of is. Thei r
this was purgatorial to her feet. Only God knew what She could feel their neighbours speaking throu gh Franc
wed. The queue They had been
Nort h Fmdl ley did with all the books they borro landl_?rd and landlady were in their late thirties.
to stand outside, no children.
so~~ tim~ stretched so far that some peop le had married for ten years or more, but the wife had had
contr ast to the ren to Eng·
~attm g, Just to borro w books. This was a big They_had resented Francis's idea of bring ing his child
, they ·had to was going to be
li~rary she had worked in befor e. In the cons ulate l~d m the first place. They had warn ed him that it
were only keen on alone when he told them that Adah
bnb: people to make them read fiction . They difficult for them, but left him
omically. No conso led them selve s with the
readm g text-books in order to raise their statu s econ ~ad already paid for their fare. They
their parents at
the numb er of act that, after all, the child ren woul d not stay with
on~ both ered with fiction. But in Nort h Finc hley, red. Most Nige ri~s
fiction readers was so stagg ering that Adah decid
ed to emulate A~hdown Street. They woul d have to be foste
ents. No sane
them._ She, too, started to read the work s of many contemporary with children sent their child ren away to foster-par
them . So ram·
novelists, and th_a t helpe d her a great deal cultu rally
. ' . couple would dream of keep ing their child ren with
book's, JO ents that Afric an housewives in
_In h_er ne~ Job, she had to be very fast in filing tant was the idea of foster-par
as the moth er of their
filmg tickets, ~n maki ng out readers' tickets, in
traci ng lost ones, ~gldland came to regard the foste r-mo ther
g "Tha nk you'' ; "Thank h
c t ren.
An~ all the time she was forever sayin have two sets of
you when she accepted the retur ned book s "Tha nk you" when m !!1ey say that in Engl and Nige rian child ren
soon as a
she gave the tickets back, "Tha nk you" when ' she
hand over ne~
ed
0
N~ e~s - the natal mother, and the social mother. Asexpecting a
books. In fact, work ing at the Nort h F'mehley L'b ry was more II gerian housewife in Engl and realised that she was
"Th k h t ra
All in a '
a an you, t ank you" job than anyth ing else. 45
44
child instead of shopping for prams, and knitting little bootees "I thought we decided that you were to look after them until we
she ~ould adv~rtise for a foster-mother. No one cared whether ~ got a nursery place ... I thought ..."
woman was suitable or not, no one wanted to know whether the "You mean. you ~ecided; you thought it all out, and then you
house was clean or not; all they wanted to be sure of was that th tell me ~hat I ~ go~ng to ?o. E!erybody__la"1g?5 at us in this place.
foster-mother was white. The concept of "whiteness" could cover : No African child lives w1th his parents. It 1s not converuent· ~it
multitude of sins. ' is not possible. There ~s no accommodation for it. ~ver,-thcy?
This was all right for the Nigeri~n wife ~ho, for the first time, won't Jearn good English. Th~y are much, much better off with an
was tasting the real freedom of bemg a wife. She was free from E_!!8}!~_1}___'!2~an.'' -
the hindering influences of her kith and kin, she was free to work "But you forget, Francis, that whe'!_ ~e ~ere _young, we spoke
and earn money. Any type of work would do : cleaning, pack- Yoruba flawJ~S$ly,. even though ~.we are . lbos. We pickecl the
ing goods in a factory, being a bus conductor; all sorts of things. language up at school and at play. That shouldn't be difficult. Our
The money she thus earned went partly to the foster-mother, and the ~!ish! !ours '.'-°d mi~e, .is ~o~ a!l that bad," Adah explained in
rest was blown on colourful outfits from some big department store. ~er ge?flescvbl~e; -aware ~II the bme that she was not only argu-
Most Nigerian wives would say that they had to send their " mg with Francis, but with all the other tenants in Ashdown
Street.
childr~ away because they Jacked suitable accommodation for
them, and there was a great deal of truth in this. But what they H~ considered this for a while, and then replied : "But th9' have
no fnends to play with." ~ ·-
would not admit was that most of them were brought up in situ•
I
"Bu~ they will have, when they start at the nursery. am sure
ations, far, far different from the ones in which they found them- they will." ·
selves in England. At home in Nigeria, aJJ a mother had ~o- c!_o for
a baby was wash and feed him and, if he was fidgety, strap.him. ~~ah was hoping for the impossible. It would be easier for a
onto her back and carry on with her work while that baby sl~~- ;\J
1
~amel to go through the eye of a sewing needle than for a
But in_England she had to wash piles and piles of nappi~, wheel .'J with two parents to get a nursery place. The waiting list was a
m1 e 1ong.
the chtld round for sunshine during the day, attend to his feeds .. th
~ regularly as if one were serving a master, talk to the child,.ev~ Jea~ethn he landlord started his intimidation. The children must
if he_w~ only a day old! Oh, yes, in England, looking.afte r~ foster-mothe · · ~
t,. ·t
e ouse He.._eye... •·~ Ao....L-Y}?Qg -h"~~«:!_f to advertise for a
child___ . 6or for~~- Lucktly, no one offered_to·ta1ce·"two black ~
~ tn •ts:lf a full-~ime job. This was difficult f9r a Nige~i~J'if!,. ren, Y and girl d · ·- · -
0
cope with, espeaally when she realised that she could no longer tively" ·'rh _ • age nme months and two_years respec-
1
c~unt on the help the extended family usuaJJy gave in such situ· alone. · e andlady sensed that Adah did not like it and left her
ations. So most Nigerian children born to the so-called "students" But the me •st d
were condemned to be fostered away. their four chi~d~;rs• e : Anoth~r couple, the Ojos, who had left
bo n behmd, advised Adah to send hers back to
ri!verybody expected Adah to do the same. It came as a big sur·
Ptt e, therefore, when they realised that she was not making any
Nigeria E
Adah ~as ;:r dy talked and speculated. The trouble was that
~~~• who_ kept wanting to win all the tim:e.
a empt to loo_k for a foster-mother. And now Francis told her tbat Onlyjirst-cl e
he was not going to 100k f h . They ·wer~tci~ze_ns lived '_V_tt~_~J!.~ ~~t_l, not ~e blacks. ')
a ter er chtldren for her any more.all }ljs .
'1"1. :
.l .1ungs were difficult c
life been all d
•
.lOr FrancJS, too. He had never Jn
•
J·
that for days sh~ m ,a way. Tlie _housing conditions wereso6ad
owe to mak hi . h d of!\'er home from k •dn t see Francis at all. As soon as she arrived
made his own d . . e s own mistakes because he a bis
had no <>n-. wor he would disappear for fresh air. The children
father and his b:~ons. He had always consulted his moth_er, }lis f ....,usements a d th .
_eu parents would not let them out for
Nigerian neighbo ~~dIn England he had to make do withhitn ear they would bre n
behind her back u~s. h ah guessed that they had laughed at th hushed and buff ~ th ~ir necks on the steep stairs. They were
should not b d•~d mto stlence so that the landlord and his wife
before replying. w en 5 e was at work. So she took a deep brea e 1sturbed· When 1t . was often, the
• d , which
· rame

47
 . dried in the same room. The second-hand heater th
nappies were . li d h b . ey
used always smoked. The Obis ve not as uman etngs at al~
but like animals. . all even if it took bun all day. It started to dnzzle and he was
To cap it all, after th~ day's wor~, Adah did not have ~ufiicient
space to sleep in. Francis wa~ getting very fat, and thetr single
bed was not big enough for him, let alone the pregnant Adah. So,
usually, when she was ~ot neede? by her husband, she would
squeeze in on the settee with her babies.
At about this time she met and became friendly with a Cockney
girl called Janet.
Janet was Mr Babalola's wife. Her story was not only remark•
able, but startling as well.
Mr Babalola had come to England, just like Francis and Adah,
to study. But, unlike Adah and Francis, he had been single, and
had a Northern Nigerian Scholarship. This meant that he had more
money to spend, because the Northerners, unlike the over•
educated Southerners, would do anything to encourage their men
to really get educated so that they could come home and obtain the
jobs in the North which were then going to the Southerners. Mr
Babalola was, therefore, a very rich student.
_R_umour _had it that he had a glossy flat and was always enter·
tamm~. Tius was no surprise to anyone who knew the Northerners.
They liked to spend their money, to really enjoy what they had, and
to th em what they had was theirs only today; not tomorrow or_tbe
day afte~. Allah would take care of the future. That was certainly
Babalola s philosophy of life.
F?r some reason, however, the money for Mr Babalola stopped
commg, n~ one knew why. One thing was sure he was not doing
. .
any studytng• though he h ad come ongmally ' · alisrn,
w to read Journ .
t _or:_went round that he was getting poor. He could not ,na~n·
dam tis okld level of entertainment so his friends of the happier
ays oo to their heel5 Th
moved to a •
'
ey stopped coming, an
d Babalola.
'sh
Town. much more modest area - Ashdown Street in .I(entl
d he
It was at this time h . 00
was desperate! t in • w en h_is funds were running low_an an·
other opportu ~tyryh g to convince his government that, given
He was wa7t~n' i:wo~ld do well, that he met Janet.
to one of h'
. call
g patiently at a telephone kiosk to make a . J
eernc:u
IS now elu . f .
ages but the y Sive riends. He waited for what s tcb
, oung woman already in the kio,k seemed to c1u
48
at the receiver for hours. Many oth~rs came, got tire? of waiting an~
left, grumbling. But ~abalola waited. He was g~mg to make his
c et;ing soaked to the skin, so he banged on the kiosk door, and
~ook his fist at the girl to frighten her. Then he looked closer,
and saw that the girl was not phoning anybody, she was asleep,
standing up.
Babalola's first reaction was fear. Was she dead, he wondered?
Then he banged harder and the girl woke. He was so sorry for her
that he took her home.
Janet was pregnant. The father of her baby was a nameless West
Indian. Her stepfather would not take her in unless she promised
to give the child away. Her mother had died a year before, leaving
her stepfather seven young children to look after. Janet was the
oldest, so she had been turned out of the house. She would not go
to any social worker; all he would do would be to convince her
that, at the age of sixteen, she was too young to keep her baby.
But Janet wanted her baby.
This story awakened the communal African spirit in Babalola. It
~ever ~ccurred to him that he was doing anything illegal, taking
10 a s1_xtee_n-year-old girl. On the contrary, Babalola started to
ente~tam hts few remaining friends with Janet. It never occurred
to him that he might fall in love with her, that he might want to
protect her, to make her his wife; at that time Janet was being
fffered to any black man who wanted to know h~w a white woman
ooked undressed. Most of Adah's neighbours had had their sexual
adventures with Janet. But soon all that changed.
he~::}~l~realised that Janet could get dole money for herself and
to d noug~ to pay the rent. Janet, not knowing where else
nesgo an also, like Adah, coming to terms with Babalola's weak·
.~;• complied. Soon Babalola started to monopolise Janet.
pick Ju arc not_thinking of going straight with that thing you
Babe ulP at ~ kiosk?" his friends asked, astonished.
a O1a said noth10 d
liberal w •th h. .
·
8, b ut gave or ers to Janet to stop being
glowed ~ is friends any more. Janet, feeling wanted at last
·second · B b nl alfter her first baby, she became pregnant with he;
• a a o a's
It was at th' ..
straight awa l~ ttme that Adah arrived. They became friends
the rumour;' b ah found Janet very intelligent and realised that
""anted a roo; out her sleeping around were not true. She only
over her head so that she could bring up her little
49
 He was then a noisy eighteen-month-ol d baby wh
boy, T ony. .. o"as
a good playmate for Tit•:
Adah told Janet about her troubles and Janet _confided in Adah
She suggested that Adah should loo~ for a daily-minder for ~
children until the nursery had vacanaes for them. Even Babalola
was willing to help - by now he h~d become unpopular with h'
friends because he refused to hand his "fish and chips" girl aroun:
The search was really depressing. It reached a point where Adah
had to start knocking on door after door. Things got even worse
for her when Francis failed his summer examinations. He blamed
it all on her. If she had not brought her children and saddled him
with them, if she had allowed them to be fostered, if she had not
become pregnant so soon after her arrival, he would have passed.
Francis forgot that it had taken him five attempts to pass the first
part, that he did not attend any lectures because he felt he could do
better on his own, that he was always reluctant to get up early
enough in the mornings.
Luckily for Adah, Babalola heard of Trudy. She had two chil·
dren of her own and agreed to look after Adah's two as well.
Francis praised Trudy to the skies. She was clean, well dressed and
very friendly. Adah had not seen her yet, because she usually "".ode·
ed late in the library, coming home at eight o'clock most evemngs.
She would dress the children and Francis wheeled them to
Trudy's, which was just a block ~way and collected them at six,
after Trudy had washed them and gi;en them tea. That, at )east,
was the arrangement.
After a ~ew weeks, Adah noticed that Titi stopped talking alto-
gether. This surprised Adah because Titi was a real chatter·bo~·
~he wondered what was happening and decided to take the ~•I·
ren hto Trudy herself. After all she had carried them for n.thne
mont s not p · ' e e
rancis. Francis was happy about this becaus 'th
1 . d,
c aune that his f · d
h ' h 'ld . rten s laughed at him when they saw w
is c I ren in a pushchair. .
L:01 w1
d on. ell • she was not M a, b ut she was Ma,s daughter and
Wh at struck Adah fi , 'Jkmafl e-
livered on) tw . rst was the fact that Trudy s mi i'lell
Adah's chiidre ~ P10!s every morning even though she was ~ah'S
children took t~: m1~ coupon. But Trudy told her tha~~vered
not the two Ad-lie pmts a day and that her milkman
Adah said th. saw, but five pints every day. t,efore
1 self for nJt!:,;: ex~sed himself though, and Adah blamed her~
leaving for w~~k ~! but started giving her children cerr0 all she
could to bringT•;. b is meant extra work, but she would
11
ack to her o~d self again.
50
. sy she started paying Trudy visits on her half-days.
Sb11 unea ' d ' h like all the h ouses
She did not like what she saw. Tru y s ouse,
. th t ea, was a slum. A house that had been condemned ages
in ~/r back yard was filled with rubbish, broken furniture, and
~~~ ne:r an uncover~ dustbin was the toilet, the old type of
toilet with faulty plumbing, smelly and damp. , . .
On the first day that Adah went, she saw Trudy s two little girls
playing in the front garden. ~ey both_ had ~ed slacks and blue
pullovers. Their long brown hau was tied with well-pressed red
ribbons. They were laughing and looked very happy. They swung
something in the air and Adah realised that Trudy's girls were
playing with the spades and buckets that she had bought for her
own children. Her heart burned with anger, but she told herself
to stop behaving like the little Ibo tigress. After all, she had not
stayed five good years at the Methodist Girls' High School for
nothing. At least she had been taught to tame her emotions. May-
be her children were having a nap or something.
She walked in and entered the sitting-room. She saw Trudy, a
plump woman with too much make up. Her lips were scarlet and
so were her nails. The colour of her hair was too black to
be natural. Maybe it was originally brown like those of her little
girls; ?ut the jet black dye gave her whole personality a sort of
~lgar~ty. She was laughing loudly at a joke which she was shar-
mg with a man who was holding her at a funny angle. Adah
closed her eyes. The laughter stopped abruptly when they noticed
her.
::Why are~'t you at work?" Trudy gasped.
lo kl. was going to the clinic at Malden Road, so I thought I'd
0 10
and see how you were getting on with Titi and Vicky."
be t There . was a pause, d unng • w h 1'ch Adah could hear her heart-
a racing She was fi n d mg ' .
it more and more difficult to con-
trol h ·
the fa~; t~per. She r~membered her mother. Ma would have tom
situati· Y Wissues of this woman into shreds if she had been in this
come wh t
' '
"Wh a may• sh e was sti·11 an Ibo. She screamed.
Was about t
ere are my ch'Id ~ y .,
II T 1 ren. ou pro - She stopped herself. She
lllan watch'o cath rudy a prostitute, but was not sure whether the
" open, was her husband or not
em ' wi'th h'is fl tes
.. ne man mg
""-- ·
husband. H pleting her sentence. The man was not Trudy's
.
e was a lover·, a cust omer or a boy f nend,
or maybe a
51
mixture of both. Adah did not care. She wanted to see her ch"Jd
Trudy pointed towards the door. Adah's eyes follow~ ren.
ointing finger to the. back yard. ~e
Yes, Adah could hear the f a.int
P th. . h.
voice of Vicky, babb1mg s~me mg m is own special langua e
She ran out and saw her children. She stood there, her knees sht
ing and burst into tears. 'i
Vicky was busy pulling rubbis h out of the bin and Titi was wash-
the water leaking from the toilet. When
ing her hands and face with
they saw her, they ran to her, and Adah noticed that Vicky had no
nappy on.
"They won't talk to us. The other day I gave an ice-cream to
Titi, and she did not know what to do with it. They wet them-
selves all the time." Trudy went on and on like a woman possessed,
talking non-stop.
Adah bundled the children into their push-chair and took them to
the children's officer at Malden Road. After all, Trudy was a regi-
stered baby-minder, whatever that was supposed to mean.
The children's officer tut-tutted a great deal. Adah was given a
cup of tea and told not to worry too much. After all, the children
were all right, weren't they?
While they were still talking, Trudy arrived in floods of tears.
She protested that she had only allowed them into the back yard that
day because she had a stinking visitor who would not go. Had th
Adah not seen him? He wouldn 't leave her alone. Of course the
children had wandered into the back yard. She wouldn't have e
heart to put a dog there, to say nothing of little "angels" like th
Adah's kids. She was a registered daily-minder. Registered by :
Borough of Camden. If her standards had been low, she wo~
not have been registered in the 'first place. Adah should ask Miss
Stirling.
· was the children's officer. She wore a red dress and
. M.iss st·IC1mg
nmless spectacles, the type academics in old photographs usual
ng now, as her 0 ~~
wore. She_blinked a great deal. She was blinki
111
~as mentioned. But she could not get a word in, Trudy was
mg all the running.
~
0
! _Adah, she list_:ne~ to Trudy destroying forever.:9ne_~
~he '!_lyrl'is snehad been Drought up to believe : that the wh~~re
de~~r1i1, She had grown up among white missionaries who_
th worke d among J\~e:
!,an
1
~ icate to eir work, she had then
d_1plomats who were workin gfor their country in Nigeri a. ~ly
since she came to England the only other whites she had actUa
52
,mixed with were the girls in the library and Janet. She had never
t the like of Trudy before . In fact she could not believe her
mes· she just gaped.m astoms . L - t.
muen
earTrudy even went as far as to tell the children's officer that Adah's
kids drank five pin~s of milk a day. She lo~e~ the children, she
aid and to prove it she made a grab at Titt, but the child re-
.
~oil;d, protesting wildly.
Trudy was reprimanded and she promised to mend her ways.
She would never let the children out of her sight. Six pounds a
week was not easy to come by especially for a woman who stayed
at home all day.
She babbled all the way home, telling Adah her whole life his-
tory and the history of her parents and her grandparents. But Adah
could not stop thinking about her discovery that the whites were
just as fallible as everyone else. There were bad whites and good
whites, just as there were bad blacks and good blacks ! Why, then
did they claim to be superior?
From th~t day on she took everything Trudy said with a pinch of
salt. Francis told her not to worry. Even if the children were left
in the back yard, he was sure it must have been clean before the
kids messed it up. Instead he told Titi and Vicky to be good chil-
dren _and never,_ never go near the rubbish dump again because
d~s.tbms were dirty. The babies just stared at him. Then he told
Titt that if she did not keep herself dry' he would beat her with his
belt.
But. how was T'Jh· toobey an order that she did not understand?
1ndN_ige~ia and on the boat, she was a noisy toddler talking
' teach·
an • y
. s10gmg m oruba like all her little friends . Adah was
tng her EngJ'tsh sentences, and someti.mes read her nursery
rhymes
now sh of. whic
· h "B aa baa, black sheep" was her favourite. But
and ~ simply refused to talk. Adah worried so much about it
1 Thpo e to God about it in her prayers.
y
Not hen _one day a friend and classmate of .hers came to visit them.
avmg anyth · ·
of custard . W mg to give her, Adah decide~ to make her a bowl
Titi in y bhen her back was turned, the friend started to tease
Adah' f _oru a, encouraging her to talk. Tired of Titi's silence,
nd
You ~edrite slknapped at Titi : "Have you lost or sold your tongue?
ota tom e 10 · N " • Why don,t you talk to me now?"
'll
Then Titi th • igena.
to me. M:y Dade P?0 r thmg, snapped back in Yoruba: "Don't talk
And I don't k wiU cane me with the belt if I speak in Yoruba.
now much English. Don't talk to me."
53
i
)
 Adah was so startle~ that sh~ spilled the ~ot custard she was
making. So that was 1t! Francis wanted theu daughter to st
speaking only in English. art
This was due to the fact that Nigeria was ruled for so long
time by the. English. _An _intelligent man was judged by the way h:
spoke English. But 1t did not matter whether the English could
speak the languages of the people they ruled. This convention
had a terrible effect on little Titi. She later overcame her difficulty
in speaking, but she was well over six years old before she
mastered any language sufficiently well to be able to converse in-
telligently. That early confusion retarded her verbal development
a great deal. But, thank God, it did not land her in one of those
special schools for backward children !
After that revelation, Adah started nagging Miss Stirling to find
a ?ursery place for her children. But, as every young mother who
tned to place her child in a nursery could testify there was no place
for the children. ' She started to lose faith in herself. Had her dream of coming to
. She had t~ make do with Trudy, aware all the time that the kids
st111 pla~ed m the back yard and that Vicky's nappies were never
used, but soaked in water so that they looked used.
h She prayed to God about it, and hoped nothing horrid would
appen to the kids. God was either tired of answering her
::yts, or wanted to teach Adah a lesson. For something horrid
appen, not to Titi, but to Vicky.
)
J
An Expensive Lesson
One beautiful morning in July, Adah woke up very tired. There
were many possible reasons that could have accounted for her
fatigue : their living conditions, cramped together in one half•
room; her constant worry about the way Vicky and Titi were being
treated; her pregnancy. To cap it all, she and Francis communi-
cated only in monosyllables, and then only when the conversation
was very necessary.
the United Kingdom been right after all, or was she simply an empty
dreamer? But Francis had agreed to it in the first place. Where
had she gone wrong? She wished the Presence was still with her
to give her a clue but it seemed to have deserted her when she
landed in England. Was the Presence her instinct? It had been
very active in Nigeria. Was that because in Nigeria she was
nearer Mother Nature? She only wished somebody would tell her
whee~ she ~ad gone wrong.
. w1th this heaviness which was like the heavy load of Christian
tn 7 he Pilg rrm
· ,s p rogress, she got up reluctantly. She looked for a
m·
u~nut~ or two a_t her husband snoring away, his hairy chest going
tell ~~m t:wn ~ike troubled waves. She felt like shaking him to
leave th hw tired she was feeling, and how reluctant she was to
Would e ?use ~nd the children that day but she knew that he
Would ~?t 1~sten 10 the first place, and that even if he listened, he
dismisse~s~iss ~e~ feelings as mere superstition, just like Caesar
Sh s wife s dream about the Ides of March
b e got herself d d .
reakfast. Th resse , washed the children and gave them
Francis e e clatter of the plates and Vicky's crying woke
,, ventually
What's all th: .
even have . is noise about so early in the morning? Can't I
angrily. an eight hours' sleep in peace?" Francis demanded
··v·icky won't h h" .
ave 1s RICe Krispies. I don't know what the
55
matter is. with him this m?rni.~g. He isn't ~ot or anything, just
raging with temper at. nothing, Ad~ ex~lamed.
Francis looked at his son for a while. Vicky stood in the middle
of the room with his mouth pouting in determined anger, and his
bib dripping with milk. Francis sighed and was on the verge of
turning over to face the other side of the bed when Adah
said:
"I feel so heavy this morning, and have no appetite either.
Could you please take the children to Trudy for me? I'm late as it
.
15.
" Trudy. They had little left after this, and so it was imposible for
"Oh, God," groaned her husband.
"Will you take them for me?" Adah pleaded.
"Have I any choice?" Francis wanted to know.
Such questions did not need answers, Adah decided within her·
self, but she was annoyed nonetheless. Could Francis not have
asked her how she was feeling or something? Would that be too
much to ask? she wondered. She told herself to stop being over·
romantic and soft. No husband would have time to ask his pr:·
nant wife how she was feeling so early in the morning. That °-£ Y
happened in True Stories and True Romances, not in real h
particularly not with Francis for that matter. But despite the bar
d vant and an orphan, but it was uncomfortable when she was a wo·
• to herself, she still yearned to be loved, to feel reauY mar·
talk mg
ried, to ~e cared for. She was beginning to understan.d why:::
young wives went to the extent of being unfaithful, ,ust _to who
themselves feel human, just to find another human being . g
would listen to their vcices who would tell them that it was goin
to be all right. ' She
Francis was only good at giving her children, nothing el~~ not
felt veng~ful. She left the breakfast things uncleared, di . she
c?ange V1Cky's dripping bib, did not wipe the milky m?u~~thes
simply pulled out her bag from the jumble of children s c
and walked to the door, about to leave. er/·
T~en Vicky, seeing his mother was leaving him, started~~ cir·
In his hurry to grab her skirt, he tipped more milk _ont~o have a
petless floor. Adah smiled inwardly. Francis was gotng · ; d go for a walk.
busy day. . d }lif1l·
She_picked Vicky up, cooed to him reassuringly and ki;at ~,s
But V1Cky would not let her go. He held on to her tightly. who oot·
odd , t~ought Adah. Vicky was a contented fat baby, wdaY·
mal!y JUS t said " bye bye" to Adah most mor~ings. But "~en we
Adah sat down again and cuddled him, sang to him, and
~6
"bye bye" came. A te~rful one, a reluctan~ one. ~c walked .to ~e
door, this time clutching at a tcas~n, still wcanng the dripping
bib. As for Titi, she was past carmg. She seemed scarcely aware
of all the goings-on around her. She seemed to have resigned her-
self to the inevitability of it all. She seemed to tell her little self
that her crying would not chang~ anything and she must accept
things as they were.
Adah's pay at work was just enough to pay the rent, pay for
Francis's course, his examination fees, buy his books and pay
Adah to have lunch at work. She usually took a boiled egg with
her, instead of having it in the mornings for breakfast. But some-
times she got bored with having just a boiled egg and the coffee
provided in the library and she ate nothing. On those occasions,
she felt that type of hunger which she thought she had outgrown.
The hunger that held the two sides of one's stomach and
squeezed them so tightly that the owner of the stomach felt like
passing out. Sometimes her stomach would whine and rumble in
its agony. These mumbling sounds in Adah's stomach used to em-
barrass her no end. It was all right in Nigeria when she was a ser-
man in her own right and a mother of two!
She sensed that the hunger-pangs were about to start, during her
lun~ break, so she decided to go for a walk instead. _It was wet
outside, and the staff-room was cosy and warm. The girls had al-
ready sat down and were talking of their conquests and, as usual,
abou~ marriage. She was beginning to agree with them that some
~arriages could lead to happiness because the girls talked of noth·
in~ else but the happy ones. Weli hers was not happy, though she
still be1ieved
· '
that a happy marriage · f or a gu
was an ideal hfe . 1·
~e~e of the girls, Cynthia, was engaged to be married, and was _swe
th s was going to work. Adah had agreed with her so many tunes
th at she was no longer in the mood to listen to her happy chatter
at day. Cynthia would notice her rumbling stomach and offer her
sorne f 0 d h
w0 °
1
, and ask her if she was all right and all that, so s e
rest he usually walked along Finchley Road, looking at all the
Pra au_rant windows she passed. She used to tell herself that, when
bri ncihs qualified and she had become a librarian, Francis would
ng er t h ·
empty d O sue places to eat. She sensed that, in her case, 1t was an
ream. Even if Francis did qualify, he wo~ld never have
57
 ra e to bring her to a restaurant to eat, not in London any- M K0 nrad God bless her, drove her to the station. Adah ran
th e couraiz_ . d th ch 1 ~- f rsK tJ-sh Town station to Trudy's house. There was an am-
~ s e he firmly believe at su p aces were oar od5lacks from en A all d h d d
XJa11 knew that his blackness, his feeling of blacknes_s~a~firrn1; bulance waiting outsi~e theddoor: ~m Thcrowall ka alAreadahy
h d talking arguing an conJecturmg. ey new ,
t blishea- in- his mind. She kn~w that th~ was discrimination gthat ~dres~en her bring her children to Trudy's many a time. Titi
~/over-the_place, but Francis's mi~d was a fertile g~oun~ ey . T d' ..
looked at her pathetically as she ran past into ru y s stttmg-
ch attitudes could grow and thrive. P e r ~
~~mo~ ey, she would have walked straight into such pla,':' a n ~ roo;~dy was holding Vicky, wiping his face with a rag as filthy as
sure she would have been served. But "!_hat was the pomt of her an old mophead. She dipped the .rag in a bow~ of equally fil~y
dreammg about 1t, sfieliad no mone ! So ~he feasted her eyes on ffic water and rubbed it all over Vicky s face. She said she was coolmg
· 00 . ne particular . item attracted her ~at his temperature. A big bald doctor st~ there, his bag in his_ hand.
afternoon. It was a fishcake in a fish shop. The cake was yellowish The Indian doctor with whom Francis and Adah had registered
brown all round and very appetising. Her mouth started to wat~r was too busy to come and the big bald fellow in black three-piece
like that of a starving dog, so she turned away. The uneasi• suit was his locum. He stood there, this doctor looking at Trudy's
ness she had felt early in the morning seemed to descend on her ministrations objectively, as if they were no concern of his.
again with so much force that she felt she was going to cho~e. For When Adah came in, Vicky lifted a hand and called his mother.
no reason whatsoever she started to hurry back to the library. He still knows me, Adah thought, as she scooped him from Trudy.
When she reached it 'she would have a drink and a rest before She held him tightly, as if by doing so she could breathe health into
going back to work. Thank goodness it was one of her early days. the sick boy.
"What is the matter with him?" she asked, first the doctor and
She would be finished by five.
She met Cynthia at the front door of the library, strugg mg
r hur· ~en Trudy. Getting no answer, she turned to Miss Stirling, who
riedly into her light summer raincoat. " Just stood there wringing her hands. If they knew what the matter
::Thank_God, you are here. I was just going to look for Y~\t?" was, they were not going to say.
My children. What's happened to them? Are they all r gt Jd •:The ambulance is waiting. You'll find out in good time. Mean-
"How d"d d "Who . othe while we have to get him to hospital as quickly as possible," the
I you know?" Cynthia asked frightene ·
)" h ' Adah into doctor ordered.
Y?u· s e went on asking as she trotted behind
library. Th?ugh there was an urgent tinge in the doctor's voice, by
yes, how had she known? How could a mother tell anoth e; ~~ Adah s calculation Vicky was not very ill. He was hot, running to
?1an who ~ad never given birth to a baby that sometimes she :;er· a hundred and one in body temperature, yet Adah did not feel
10 th
her children? How could she explain that if her son u,.\dab at there was any need to panic. She was thinking that Vicky
went an operation her own body would ache how could d een probably had a bout of malaria which to her was just like a com-
tell Cynthia th t h h was looking . ' he ha 5 :~n. cold. Malaria would make a child's temperature run high,
y·k . a w en s e at the fishcake, s -, '}1tere
w ic ~ s wet face, twisting in pain, reflected in the window. hul1l~n 1n fit would go downhas soon as the child was given
Nivaquine.
h
b~
00
much to explain; too much about herself as a n act
wo Id '
if v·ck
1 h
Y a d ad the attack at home, that was wh at s e
e~~~h~~~he 1
did not know. She just felt these things. d and .s enc~ hhat do~e. As far as she knew, judging from the experi-
not_ cry. Victor was in danger, but not dea ' all ths e ~d with Titi, children suffered only from malaria. Why
1ong as he was alive, God would h l h' 111·
"You h 't h e p im. . nt co of rna~ P~nic _th en? she wondered. Any mother could cure a child
aven eard the message?" the other ass1sta
d tor wtia _wi th out phoning the ambulance men or calling the doc-
mented.
de;th c~rt~~mply stood there, ready as if for nothing but to sign a
Then Adah got th d trudY b~ "V· 1 cate.
. e message she had already sense · d b•f1l
h d h
p one , t ey said; Vicky . Id 't sen icky, sa 'b b . .
to a hospital bee h was very rll and she cou n home, Y ye- ye to Trudy," she said as they made their way
ause s e was waiting for Adah to come
59
58
 they
his adults, free. There must be a catch somewhere. By the time
to the door. Vicky waved bye-bye weakly, and also sang it, in arrived at the hospital she was convin ced Vicky 's innard s were
peruliar way. going to be taken away from him.
They all - Trudy, Miss Stirlin g and the docto r - opened their The thought had got such a hold of her that she at first refuse
d
But
mouths as if to tell her that the baby was too weak to talk. to let him go. Two nurses held her and took her into a small
Adah felt triump hant. Her
they kept quiet when Vicky talked. room with soft chairs lining the wall. They made her a cup of
tea,
was
son was simply running a high tempe rature , that was all. He with plenty of sugar in it. She drank it greedi ly with thanks , en-
idea. She felt like
not dying, so they might as well get used to the joying the taste of sugar which she hated norrna Jly. She had hardly
Jesus, who amazed His dumb found ed discip les when He said, and
ever had sugar because Africa n mothe rs thoug ht that sugar
"Lazarus is not dead, he sleepeth". to like eating meat, but she
meat caused worms. She had later come
The big doctor saw through her agony , her fear, and touched never really acquired the taste for sugar. But on that day at the
~er shoul?er gently as she was about to step into the street. "Yo~r Royal Free, she was too hungr y to care. She did enjoy the tea, and
will
little son 1s very ill. I don't know what it is but I am sure they w~ told to wait while Vicky was being examined. She waited
and
do their best for him at the Royal Free Hos~i tal." to worry about
w~ted, until she nearly fell asleep. Then she started
Adah thanked him, but she was determ ined not to be made un· TitJ. She hoped Francis would remem ber to go for her. It
was
happy, not be talked into expecting the worst. "I think I _know funny, real!y, she hadn't thoug ht of lookin g for Franci s. She did
what th e matter is," she boasted "I think it is malari a. Chtldre
. as you have common c~Id 5•"
n
;ot w_ant him to be worried; it wasn' t anythi ng serious. As far as
doh . at h ome, you know, just
.. av~ it
This may not be malaria you know " the doctor cautioned as
/:Ci°y~s.
was concerned, she was still at work, and Vicky was at
he and the am buJance men helped ' '
the ambul ance. ed
her into
wor~ kn SometBhing kept telling her that she should let her husba nd
1
.ckn the ambulance, her thoughts were confu sed. Her brain h h h d" ,
t• -tock as th • th·I nkin8
She at th ut .how could s e w en s e 1dn t know where he would
be ow.
fast h ' ey say in Yoruba. When ever anyon e was hues an: ~~~e of the da~? He had stoppe d attend ing regula
r lee-
1
wo~de;e;~hd say that his brain worke d like a talkin g ~<1,'· d·
io td read on his own. That meant he could be in any
could be wrong with a child who had said 8?° library in
s.
bye" t h at
o er that m · W ,nent an
a Adah was th n on, or he could be with any one of his girl friend
ambulance and a orning. hat could be so wrong as to 1'ther 1
these preoc e ~t person to distur b him if he were busy on any of
millionaire or a r d~cto'.? In Lagos, one had to ~e ~ ·t J-{e cupations. She would tell him everyt hing when she got
home.
wouldn't come . e~ative 0 ~ the doctor's to warrant his vtSJ ~
an
ambulance wa Just t a child runnin g a high tempe rature . No was The nurse and
Vicky was ve il~o youn~ doctors came to her. They told her that
the name of t~;P~~ ~g her to Royal Free, just for that. WhY~r
1
him
and, until th ry ' ut th ey d taken al1 sorts of samples from
f
people, for second P tal Royal Free? Was it a hospit al ~o~free
1

did they put the wor . per

'' th
. keep him unZrg~~ e re_sult~, they could not treat him. They would
in it? Fear starteJ ;ss people? Why To Adah h _servatton m the hospital.
Vicky to a second-cl~ shro~d her then. Were they sendingwere ~ur baby t~ b~~a l usually meant two things . Wher e you go
for
blacks? Oh G0 d hospital, a free one ,·ust becaus,r1.,, e they • 1'-t
11118 ' you're about to die.
' , what h d •
J.u~Y \:V e fir~t time she~ :/~ where Y?U go when
even use her child's or a she let hersel f in for? 11)10
of anoth er child, •Hed as 80tno to h T' . een admit ted to a hospit al was when she
would probably b wh~an to save the life knew h O ave 1tt Th l
..... adJJlll' family she
.1 e ite d . tds.h nev ad been in ah ·. 1 e on Y other person in her
~to a hospital that had ' ~~ r~ch and who would ll'-.
Thospi ta was Pa. He had gone for a check -up and
• no free · in it. A paying hospitath~-1t18 yct1 ,,.,. er came back
did not then believe 10 ..,ind · ese tho ht ch
'd ·
d1 not pay for. She .anyth •ng good comin g from some . n an
. 10
d ee- d
sens as she tried to th 'nkug s a~ed each other throug h her
l uetance. In Nigeria y
viewed a yth tng
. n
'
free with suspte yot1f had~• somehow that ht of ~e rtght decision to make. She
' ouv paid for your treatm ent. The f atter - cerr-<'r
./
iIIn... ready been' all s de roolittle choice
had in the matter . Vicky
purse, the more intensi
heard of a place where : : .ur treatment. She had never 00 !f bY -,s Was
contagious.
ocate a . l
m, an 1so ated room, in case his
ild was given such close attefl
60 61
 She was allowed to go in and see him. He had been t ck .
nicely, in a blue cot with blue fluffy bl~ets. He was no~
but stared at his mother as _so~ebody havmg a b~d migraine
as1
mi:•
1
n :0 in the tribe. Howhiswasmother would be given the status of a
1!
It seemed as if he found difficult ~o move his eyes. Could th ·
be right after all? Was Vicky very ill? She clutched the railin:
of the cot.
She was being watched through the glass partition. A nurse
came to her and told her that it was time for her to go; Vicky
needed rest and sleep. Adah nodded, and said goodbye to him, but
Vicky did not answer; his tired eyes seemed to be gazing at some-
thing which only he could see. Adah was not allowed to linger,
she had to go.
Why, she thought to herself, didn't the authoritie s permit the
mothers of young babies to stay with their sick offspring in
hospital? In Nigeria, where the weather was warm enough, she
could have stayed outside the hospital, under a big tree in the c~-
pound. ~ow she didn't know what she was going to do. Wait in
the comdor? They would shoo her off. But, until
then, that was
what_she was going to do. Fancy admitting a year-old baby into_a
h?spital_and not giving him any treatment because they were still
d_iagnosmg the symptoms. Suppose the child was seized by convul-
~t
SIOns, as her children used to be when they ran a high tem~·
The nurses would only pump injections into him, butt
li~ s~n babies suffer from these malaria seizures all through :
euland knew all the first-aid cures The hospital might not, so c
WO stay. . in "But w~ere did he get it from? We never heard of such things
sh:!: dozed_off on a wooden bench. When she opened her~:
who had :r~:d to ~ee the beautiful nurse with the soft v
She looked t ~previously that it was time to go.
"Is v·ct a dab for a long time and then smiled.
Adahi hor your only child?" , she
s ook her he d y·
a • icky was not, there was another' but
was only a girl.
"Only a girP Wh is a per·
son, too, you know ~t do you mean by 'only a girl'? She
th
Adah knew all Just like your son." •fill ad'
ture that in her s _at. But how was she to tell this beaut! of tier
husband and the tie( she could only be sure of the loved 1ceeP'
ing alive as many l\J of her parents-in -law by having a~jrl rtJ'Y
be counted as one ch \d ren as possible, and that though a ,w1dr~
put together? Andi·/ to her people a boy was like four a goO
i the family could give the b<>Y
62
iversity education,
she to explai? all ~at? That her hap-
iness depended so much on her son staying ahve.
P "Do you know, I'm making another one!" she volunteered, to
·
show the nurse how good a wife she was.
The nurse, who either did not understan d, or whose idea of a
good and valuable wife was different from Adah's, nodded but
said nothing.
If Adah did not go, they would send for her husband, she said.
She had to go.
Adah said she would only go if they used force, and so long as
they were not going to do that, she was going to stay. But she
went down to the corridor below, and watched some West Indian
housewives coming to do their cleaning jobs.
Later that night, Francis came. Titi was spending the night at
Trudy's, so he had come to look for her. For a while, it seemed
as if. Vi<;ky' s illness might bring the parents together again.
Franas did not tell her not to worry, because he did not know
how to do such things, how to be a man. Instead he cried, like a
woman, with Adah.
ree days later, it was discovered that Vicky had virus meningitis.
Adah read all about this horrible thing, with its horrible un-
onouncable name, in the library; she studied the causes, and
ew all the effects
0
eitry f~y, an~ I never heard Ma mention it to me in your family
I'd~~ ere did he get it from then? I want to know, because
..~ to prevent it in ~ture, if he has any future, that is."
space. ey cure everything here" Francis replied, gazing into
"u•
qis chances f · · · · I
~ surviving are very slim, from the statistics
checked in a
got this . medical encyclopaedia. I want to know where my son
through ~~s from. The medical books say he must have taken it
made as mis mo~th. I am very careful with Vicky and have not
&ot it fro any mistakes as I did with Titi. I want to know where he
more, I a:• a_nd look, Francis, I don't care what you think any
"What' going to find out. From Trudy"
''""' s come ov
w naf s happe . er you•;1" he demanded• , not beheving
• • •
his ears.
''\' ning to you?"
ou Want to kn
ow what's happenin g to me? I'll tell you. You
63
 . k w sooner or later. If anything happ~ns to my son,
will hav~ to n:ll y~u and that prostitute. You sleep with ·h ~
l am gomyg to b her pants with the money I work for, and•-
you not? ou uy
s end the money I pay her, w e~ I go to work. I don't
h ,-
00th Ph
d but I must have my duldren whole and perfect.
care w at you o, . 1 .h . . th ch.
. I get from this s av1s mamage 1s e tldrcn
The only thmg th be
And, Francis, I am warning you, ey must perfect
children." "f . h So bod h d
Francis looked at her, as 1 wit new ~es. me ·- y 2_
d h . that the greatest mistake an Afncan c~ul~ make was
~~ ~
to bring an educated girl to London and -1~ ~er mix . "th "ddl
w1 mt e-
class English women. They soon know the1_~ ngh~s- What was hap·
pening to them? Francis wonderea: lri their society, men were_al·
lowed to sleep around if they- wanted. That gave the nursing
mother a break to nurse her baby before the next pregnancy. But
here in London, with birth control and all that, one cou~d s :
with one's wife all the lime;- But he was not brought up like ·
Hu as~brought up to lik: variety. :w-omen·!-t home nev~r
tested, and Adah had said that she did not_mm?, but, fee~~ ...
intensity of her anger, he sensed that she did mmd. -~o ~ He
his.freedom-G.1rtailed; -particularly by a woma~,_ _h~ ~o~us e
would not argue he would ~ot beat her into submission WhY
, was
of the baby, but he not going to be tied to Adah, Cl'ther•
in bed she was as cold as a dead body!
Adah was still talking. She was going to Trudy. She was g
to get the truth from her, if it killed her. knOVi•
"God help you," Francis said. "This is not home, y~u uble
you can be jailed for accusing her falsely. You will be 10 tr~er
tf you ~o and fight a woman in her own home, you kno\\',
all, she ts keeping Titi for us "
"Y 1 . .
es, know she 1s keeping Titi so that you can pretendJeft
and see her at eleven o'clock every night. Last night your '7fork-
eSl~en, a_nd you did not come back until I was ready fo
eemg T1ti !"
to ~n un~o~fortable pause followed, during which Adah
e "."etghmg up her new freedom. After all, she ,ear
tbe :f
money 10 the family. ol
She continued1 10
· 0
• a strange threatening way · "If she aoes
~
d l
~en:el a ~ood answer, I shall bring Titi ho~e with ,:See.re •~·
mitt d . eavmg this house to work for you until the ki 1 &o!l I
e mto the nu rsery
or you agree to look after them-
64
care what your friends say. I am going to Trudy. She has something
to tell ~e." . t like your mother after all. That quarrelsome
''You re JUS . .
, People say women grow up to be like
troublemaker· theu mothers.
d
But unfortunately for you, you' re not as t~ll an menacmg· h
as s e
was. You're small, and I'm sure Trudy will teach you a lesson or
·
tw\~e'll see," Adah replied as she dashed out of the house in a
rage.
"They said at the hospi~al that Vicky ~~d virus meningitis. And
he is still on the danger hst. I want to . . . Adah began.
But Trudy cut her short.
"Yes, I phoned the hospital and they told me that. So I told
them that you had brought him to London only a few months ago.
He could have caught it from the water you drank at home, you
know, before you brought him here .. ."
P: Adah stared at her; she could not believe her ears. Was she
dreaming? What was it Trudy was saying about the child she had
had in the best hospital in Nigeria, in the best ward, under the
most efficient Swiss gynaecologist that the Americans could get
for her as a member of their staff, which was one of the innumer-
able fringe benefits attached to working for the Americans? She
'
w~~ted to explain all this to Trudy, but at that moment she saw
oing Titt, coming in from the back yard, as filthy as the last time. Adah
never knew what came over her. All she knew was that she lost
contro~ of the situation. Her inner eye kept seeing kaleidoscopic·
ally Vicky and Titi in the rubbish dump in Trudy's back yard. She
could not ~radicate that picture, rotating in her mind, and she did
tbe only thing that came to her instinctively. In front of her was an
a0 enemy, insulting her country her family her person and, worst of
to,,-
at all, her child. ' '
Somebody had left a carpet-sweeper by the door. (Adah later
;
0nd
~rcd why this was so, because there was no carpet in either of
ed rud
it Ys two rooms.) Without thinking, she picked it up, heavy as
w:,
l' an~ banged it blindly in the direction of Trudy's head!
l'~{saw it coming and dodged. Somebody, another neighbour of
bac1c_Y s who was standing in the doorway, held Adah from the
"D
behin~t;r don't, do_n't do that," this neighbour's voice came from
' cool, rational, reassuring.
65
 Adah spat, foaming in the mouth, just like the people of . h e. Mercifully somebody had called her, and she ar-
tribe would have done. AlllQng he~ people, she could have ki her ~rudy \ea:n hard and blinking furiously.
Trudy and other mothers would have stood solidly beh-:-rlled nved, b . t Jpatiently to Adah's story, and appeared to agree
, . th . f kn tnq her.""' 1 · I nstead, she was qwet . f or a
Now she was not even given e JOY O ocking senseles - ,., ' .Sheher,sen ·
but said nothing about it.
fat, l~se-fleshed woman with dyed hair and pussy-cat eyess : w,~ ' Adah looked round at these strange people. Nobody
belonged to the nation of people who had introduced "la~ .._de_ whi e,dash r or Trudy. No speech. Adah felt like a fool. She was
.. an
order. ---
blame· ePeople• here do not te11 eve....... ~ng; they d on· t say things
, ...hi
Her twnmy began to ache, just like the onset of indigesti lik . "I even allowed my busb and to s1eep w1"th h er as part of
learning.
Adah was not used to bottling up her anger. Why, hadn't~~
told her that it was bad for the system? So to let off steam, she
th: payment". She noticed one th~ng, though; Trudy looked as if
mebody was forcing her to eat shit. Her mouth went ugly, and her
threatened : :e make-up was running in streaks all over her face. Even her
"I am going to kill you. Do you hear that? I am going to kill black hair showed some strands of brown.
you, if anything happens to my child. I shall sneak in here and Then Miss Stirling spoke. "We've got nursery places for the
kill you in your sleep. If not, I' 11 pay people to do it for me, bu~ children. Your little girl could start on Monday and, when the
believe me, I am going to kill you, and with a smile on my face. baby is out of hospital, there will be a place for him too."
I saw Vicky with my own eyes in the rubbish dump. I smelt of Adah had exploded another myth. Second-class citizens could
you through my husband. I pay you with the money I earn, let my keep their children with them, but just look at the price they had
husband sleep with you, and then you want to kill my son!" to pay! Vicky was still in danger, her marriage hung in the balance,
Th~ Adah broke down and started to cry, her voice coming and now all this row.
out like that of somebody being tortured, strangled and harsh. She did not know whether to feel ashamed or grateful. She felt
The other white women stood there looking at her, shocked. They both, in a way, especially as it now seemed that her threats had
had probably never seen an angry Ibo woman. been empty ones. There was no need for them.
. If they were surprised, Adah was more than that; she was hor· She would not apologise to Trudy; that woman was a rotten liar
rdied at her own behaviour. She could not control herself any more. anrway._ They removed her name from the council list of approved
She had had so many things to bottle up inside her. In England, :tld-mmders and, still scared of Adah's threats, maybe, she left
she could '
Id -~!,_g~ t~ h~ neighbour and babble out troublesas 5 e _ --r alden Road, and moved to somewhere in Camden Town so that
~ •--~ave dg.q_e 10 Lagq_s; she had learned not to tallc al5out h~r even i·f V'ck
1 y had died, Adah could not have carried out her
•
u h appmess to those with whom she worked for· this
w ere nobod · '
wasa soa_!fL
f
threats.
could b Y was mterested in the problems of others. I you It!he left the group, and walked home, crying quietly to herself.
with not elafr your problems any more you could always do away as a cry of relief.
yourse . That 11 ' . • not
regarded as a sin was a owed, too. Attempted su1ade W~ n·
I
fortunate si'tu t· · t was a way of attracting attention to ones u t
a ion. And h • '> The a ·
tention of paid Ii ": ose attention do you attract. e
an object t b steners.. Listeners who make you feel that you ~
st
Listeners wh~ re~ udied, diagnosed, charted and tabulat Id
O
woman next door e\to you as _"a case". You don't have the
11
a wife and hu b ~ o, on hearing an argument going on betW~e
him off and al: t~n t' ~oul~ come in to slap the husband,
because she was otl an owing ~at her words would be resp 'ke5
te~J
of Miss Stirling wh d experienced. Instead you have the~ of
' ose office was along Malden Road in {con
66
 eking his little wet lips, like a toy mouse-trap. '.1
. and resma th Sh . . d
ing 0
Id no longer bear e suspense. e was impatient, an
ti.dab .' ~ g to hate it all. She hated being treated like a native
6 VI
as begmnm h was not supposed to know the unportant · h appenmgs ·
~oman/' ~y until they had been well discussed and analysed by
10
.her amfollc well Francis could not do that, not in their one-
d • S Adah wlkaednted to k ~ow mune . di-
"Sorry, No Coloureds'' tbe men . '
room apartment, he coul n t. o . d
She threw caution to the wm , wa menacmgly towards
ateIy.husband,
her
th f
snatched the envelope to e amazement o the atter,
1
One morning, when Adah was rapidly tying her colourful Jappa ened it and ran her eyes through the contents.
around her thickening waist in her haste to catch the train to work, opThe message was short, to the point. No meandering.
her husband, who had gone out of the room, came in walking as A certain solicitor, representing their landlord, would like them
if in a trance. He looked dejected, disappointed, and Adah to quit and give up all claims to the tenancy of their one-room in
thought she saw his hands shake. She looked up, the string of her Ashdown Street. And within a month !
lappa still between her· lips, and her eyes started to beg for an ex- This left a harrowing emptiness inside her.
planation. Francis was not unaware of this, but for the time be- Adah left the letter on the table, and went on dressing. There
ing he seemed to have decided not to tell her anything. Instead, was no need to ask each other what they were going to do, because
he flopped down on the only available sitting place in the room- there was nothing they could do. Adah had known the notice
their unmade bed. would come. She had. not actually had an open confronation with
"Sad news," he spat out ·eventually, as if he had a poison that any of the tenants, neither had she had any disagreement with the
tasted bad in his mouth. He reminded Adah of a snake spitting landlady, because she did everything to avoid such clashes, but
out.venom._Francis had a small mouth, with tiny lips, too tiny fora tbere ~ere many factors working against her. In fact to most of
her N1 · nei_g · hbour~, ~he was having her cake and '
typical African, so when he pouted those lips like that, he looked She ge:ian eating it.
so unreal that he reminded the onlooker of other animals, not any- wedas 10 a white man s Job, despite the fact that everybody had
thing human. warn her against 1·t, and 1t . look ed as if she meant to keep it
Sh 1
Adah, knowing him, did not hurry him. He might decide not to el e_v.:ou d not send her children away to be fostered like everybody.
tell.her at all, and then her whole day would be ruined with woo- se, mstead they Ii · .
were first 1 . ~ere vmg with them, just as if she and Francis
de~~ng what on earth it could be. So she took her time. were Ibo ·c ~s citizens, in their own country. To cap it all, they
. What sad new~?" she asked, her heart thumping ~een her
nbs. S~e was making a frantic attempt to make her voice sound
t;
ideologie:•
1
~at_ed people who always believe blindly in their
body else ·th e ' if they were going to be different from every-
u~um~d, normal. Anything for a quiet life. Vicky' 5 ;d ~ ~ould have to go away from them. When the fact of
ranas held up an envelope an impersonal type of envelope, looking at ~~s:n t_o the hospital became known, everybody kept
one of '
those hor_ri"ble khak"•·coloured h aid the
ones that usually er
•
th the childless l dr•th an "I told you so" sort of sympathy. Even
gas bill or e pmk statement from the London Electricity Board,
Pecting her tha?d adr was able to take the news that Adah was ex-
In any case, that type of envelope never brought good news to sJJY" sure that Vicky1rwaswith. equam~uty · · because, at the time, she was
one.
"It is very, very bad news And bel. I am beginnil18 had arrived hom going to die. Instead, three weeks later, Vicky
to lose faith . h . ' ieve me, . sus· ~~rsery place Wai;i:ro;n t~e hosp!tal, weak, but alive and with a
m uman nature," he went on savouring Adah 5
f ense: She was not surprised to hear th; latter statement fro: ah and her husb gd or him. Tius was more than they could bear.
lt was an must go
h ranas. He was always disappointed in human nature when o~. ing . a surprise t F ..
umans refused to bend to his wishes. He now sat there, slll in thern. and do _rancis, because he thought that by confid-
a aptmg to th eu . d d
stan ar s they would accept
68
69
J
 him. But he was forgetting the Yoruba saying that . • soiled and discarded items, afraid of what the
hungry dog does not play with one with a full stomach"g ;s, :a counters. c;~rr;n!gh t say. Even if she had enough D,!,.9ng _fa_t.,the
forgot that, to most of their neighbours , he had what the· dir:as shop assiswould start lookiiigat the sub~stal!da rd ones an~ tJJen
have. He was doing his studies full time, and did not hav/t not t,est, she This was where she differed fro~ Franc1~ and
about money because h1s w1'fe was earning
. . o Worry !"ork her wThay yuklieved that one had to start with the inferior and
enough to keep th
going. He could see his children every day and even had ~rn the others. because
e being black meant b emg
· · f enor.
· W e11, Adah
m
audacity to give his wife another. One never knew, Adah : s~ay tbere,t believe that wholly, but what she did know was that
Francis might even have another boy. They should go as
possible from Ashdown Street. They knew how difficult it wou~
fa:° did. not garded
t,e~re
ye as inferior had a psycho1og1ca
.
. 1 e ffect on h er. The
.
lt was- that she started to act m the way expecte d
of her be-
be for them, but that was the desired effect. resu e she was still new in England, but after a while, she was not
Thinking about her first year in Britain, Adah could not help
wondering whether the real discriminat ion, if one could call it
;:ag to accept it from anyone. She was going to regard herself
as the equal of any white. But meanwhile she must look for a place
that, that she experienced was not more the work of her fellow- to live.
countrymen than of the whites. Maybe if the blacks could learn to
live harmoniQusly with one another, maybe if a West Indian land- Every door seemed barred against them; nobody would consider
lord- could learn not to look down on the African, and the accommodating them, even when they were willing to pay double
African learn to boast less of his country's natural wealth, there the normal rent. She searched all she could, during her lunch hours
would be fewer inferiority feelings among the blacks. and on her way home from work. Francis would then take a turn.
In any case, Francis and Adah had to look for another place to They had one or two hopeful experience s, but they were rejected
live. If it had been possible for them to find a new place, they would as soon as it was known that they had children.
have moved within weeks of her arrival in London. But it had not The landlord and the landlady were walking on air. They had
been. During the days and weeks that followed, she had asked got the _proud couple down at last. They started to complain about
people at work if th~ knew of anywhere. She would read and_re· eve~ng. When the children cried, the landlord would stamp
. ") read .~ll that sho wm ws had to advertise. Nearly all the nonces
r ~ ~ Sorry, no coloureds on them. Her house-hunt ing.J¥~ft ~
~t~irs, warning them that they were disturbing the other tenants
chi~d:dlady , still childless, claimed that Adah was showing off he;
,,,,s '>• ~ e_ ~ t ecause she was black; black, with two very young ca · Why must Adah allow them to toddle about when she
~ ~ chilclrea and pregnant with another one. She was beginning to me out to fetch t ? Sh
The land! wa_ er· e must lock them up in their room.
, ~earn t!:1at her colour was something she was suppose~ to be ing the Jdy con:iplamed to her husband that Adah was bring-
sham~cl of. She was never aware of this at home in Nigena, even .Ad: d~wnstairs to distress her.
~hen 10 the midst of whites. Those whites must have h ad a feVI
showing ~ ~t know. what to do about this. If it looked like
essons about colour before coming out to the tropics, because th~Y 0
never ~et drop from their cautious mouths the fact that, in th eir her Ma we~ts t~rwas very sorry ~ut,it, because she knew what
Boy. Due t th" ou~h when she d1dn t have another child after
~o~ntnes, blac~ was inferior. But now Adah was beginning. to
pride in he~ ch~~dchildhood experience , Adah learnt to keep her
°t•
.n so di_d not waste her time looking for accornmod atl:
m a _c ean, desuable neighbourh ood. She, who only a few rnon s another childl 1 ren to herself. She was always wary of telling
babble endless~s\woman what Vicky or Titi said, though she could
~::•:~~~i ;~ulj have acce~ted i:iothing but the best, had by n; ;
~he to do? Sh/to~dotber yo~ng mothers like herself. But what was
to suspect ; . to bexpe~t mfenor things. She was now Ie;'n the
. any mg eauttful and pure. Those things were or .-... ow could a m th th e babies not to follow her about But pray
wh 1tes, not the blacks. abo O
so ut, When those ertllh
ch"l~ er young children not to ·follow
'
her
'
w Thi~ had:r-arrio us psychological effect on her. Whenever sh: ey~ebody else's car ? 1 ren had been all day in the nursery, in
ent into big clothes stores, she would automatica lly go to th on their rnothe e. The only way the children could keep an
r Was by following her about.
70
71
 This was made more difficult because, though she cooked in th . in kind • hav;ng J;ved most of her formative yeus ;n a
small room, the only tap water for the tenants was on the eu mission f~ school, she h~ long forgotten the art of hurling
· d d ground
floor. This meant A ah ha to go up and down a great deal A d abusive songs at others. Sometunes, though, she would scream
when she was _downstairs the children would caJl to her, w~nti~ "The Bells of Aberdovey" or "The Ash Grove" at the top of her
to hear her votee for reassurance. WelJ, you know how the voic g voice, but her listeners did not understand what she was sing-
of children of that age are, especialJy to the ears of people who ha: ing about. And even if they had, the songs were as inappropriate
never had children and who are dreaming that, when they do as wearing a three-piece suit on a sunny afternoon in Lagos. This
they wiIJ bring them up in such a way as to make them behav; went on so much that Adah started to doubt her senses. She would
Jike "decent" children from the very earliest age. laugh loudly at nothing, just to show her neighbours how happy she
One of the peculiarities of most Nigerian languages is the fact was. The funny thing about the whole situation was that she was not
that one could make a song of everything. Native housewives used unaware of the fact that her showy behaviour was really uncalled
this method a Jot. If an older wife of a polygamous marriage for. But it seemed that, like Francis, she had lost control of the
wanted to get even with a younger rival who was the favourite situation. Just like a person living with a madman would. You
of the husband, she would make up all sorts of songs about the come to behave and act like a mad person if you are surrounded by
younger woman. Many women would go as far as to teach their mad people. Was that what people call adaptation? she wondered.
Two weeks later, on the noticeboard in front of the post office
children these songs, which were meant as a kind of psychological
at Queen's Crescent, she read on a blue card of a vacant room.
pressure on the young woman. . .
There was no "Sorry, no coloureds" on it. Adah could not believe
Of course, at Ashdown Street, neighbours would start singing
~er ey~. And the vacant room was not very far from where they
as soon as they saw Adah coming. Most of the songs were abo~I
lived: Just around the corner, in Hawley Street. To make sure the
the fact that slte and her husband would soon have to make their
h ome tn · the street. What use would her education be then., the room would be kept for them, she decided to phone the landlady
1 ashsoon as she got to the library. She would make sure she phoned
songs would ask. To whom would she show her children off then.
;. en the other assistants were out of earshot otherwise they would
It was all so Nigerian. It was alJ so typical. u 1
Sh; ~ ~er mad or something. She had it au' planned in her head .
. Matters came to a new head when the landlord got so fed P
sh a worked and talked for almost six months in London, so
with th em that he decided not to accept their rent. Only someone
who had been tn · ·
· a similar . h t an emo- whe_twas beginning to distinguish the accents. She knew that any
. situation would know w a . , r's 1 ·
the eh would recognise the voice of an African woman on
ttonal tortu~e this could be. Adah and Francis had the soltcithto ·r
letters pouring 10 · ber of et nostf.J one. So to eradicate that, she pressed her wide tunnel-like
every week counting down the num k ...., pract:s:~o~ether _as i_f to keep out a nasty smell. She practised_and
d ays for them · J'k ' They n~~ had
th • Just I e a blast-off day for astronauts. The 1-i'ial er voice 10 _the loo, and was satisfieq with thu ~lt.
th:h ;;:;l~r:ot ~anted, because they were Ibos, becaus~ ~ey and Bi rrni~n h;1Y would definitely _not mistake her_for a woman f.rom
n with them because Adah worked in a Jtbr ryhich lish-spe~ki: or ~ondon, yet she could be Irish, Scots or an Eng-
b ecause they f d · .' d rd W
th oun it difficult to conform to the stan a It w g Italian. At least, all these people were white.
ey were expected to live by . eet as stup'd 0 f h e~ though, because the landlady would find out
Meanwhile th · re dir eventuall S~
form "I , e ~ongs and the laughs took a much mol .,e otJ' the land/cl / was simply counting on human compassion. When
• cant wait tO h . d ea•
see t em pack their brats an hau~ay,
house " th
I d With her at: ?und out that they were blacks, she'd beg her, plead
to nobodye ,· ant ll~dky would say loud and clear along t!1e an open Was born Af ve them a place to stay, at least till after her baby
' us i e a m d . b ut Jll . to
asylum. At the end of a woman roammg a o burst in, pli
that her h~ was ~ure her plea would move anybody, forgetting
one of her i . her proclamation, she would then tnef11 in The voif th ad failed to move her countrymen.
. mprovised songs, sometimes dancing to · 1.1sneS5• Woman. Sh: s at answered the phone was that of a middle-aged
a maniacal sort of way All th· . d Ad h' conscJO di•na
lm d · · · rs Jarre on .n a s n0!l o ounded busy and breathless. Not a very cultured
a ost nvmg her craz\•, · She h ad to b ear it . w1·thout resr
73
72
 ~
. "We've got a
voice, rather like the voices of the h . k. " she cried with JOY~ but whe n I
. ed for one roo 'h t we will
bages at Queen's Crescent market. s rte mg Women who so]d
c,i, / , , . e like that,
k at m advertis d ess w a '
yes, the two rooms were still availabl 'T J rooms . She acant . An ' gu h e Two rooms
,,
two h d two v e pay er . .
amount Francis and Adah were paying at ~sh~e rent was the
'>l<I ro0m he said she a four pounds w
, . been readmg
would keep the rooms for them No h d. own Street. Ye,,s1i phoned, s nly the same
She w~ a grandmother herself, but he:
where in America. Was Adah an Am .
g:..:1;:~~
mind child,.,_
th J r~n were some-
have to. pay od I"
Lon on. f Franc1 .
·s He hadbe1the
forulslinthis was too much orhe was sleeping el'ke somebody
forer
Adah's bang
in a
he was f ·t He
kn ) Sh
t0 ~w. he sounded like one,
erican , e voice wanted t
went on the voice. She'd be veiy giij' · hard or
dAconcentrating k him. Either way, ·1
I
t come out o I •
.
ave t em, to keep her house alive. an the front door wo_ e ·m uite a wh1 e o
d it was taking h\f _qto wakefulness. . t Who is this
It was all so friendly, so humane. But what would happen wh!n on
? Just wait a mmul e. he all right?
daze :;ed in jolting h1mse m
the landlady was faced with two black faces? Adah told hen,U succe what, er . . . . .. . two roomhs. )"s s
er er
to the Wt "Who, er . . .
th~t it would be better to postpone this discovery . g us a room , , . h . n't s e. the rooms th"IS
she's all ng t, _is
minute. One could never tell, she consoled herself the _,. Person offenn
k after
This woman. I mean . · 11· · . ht We, re go1ng to see ·11100
might_ not even mind their being black. Hadn't she th~~hi";i;~
American? Adah realised that perhaps she made a little mistake "Of
evenin g.
course she
I told
":e ;~1.i
her t
come the
take
J~?e;.::i.
at nine. s,
room
explained,
the_re. She ought to have jumped at the woman's suggestion and . f We mus
. . mewhere.
the chddr:n .or us. .
. to be American . Afte r all, there were black and white
claim ed
Ame rican s! her voice rmgmg n:1us1~alldy.that there was a catch m it sho
So she
But Francis ma1_ntame "You said you spo~ e to er.
n had in·
Mean while she walk ed, as it were, on air. The woma He went on probm g Ad".'1 . • I must say.' The
to it. Why
vited her and Franc is to come and that was all there was 5
heard your voice, then? It arn~ ng, oman woul d take
them .
ed so jubila nt? On her
expe ct refus al, when the wom an had sound Adah hoped very much t_hat : :f a little boy. He always r~
it seerne ~ to
way home on the platf orm at Finch ley tube station, joy on Francis's face was lik~ tba he was pleas ed. She di
into view
her ears and mind that the train that curled gracefulJy minded her of their little V1Cky whe?
r
ve her. He had neve
ism. !twas
was singi ng with her. Shari ng her happi ness and optim .
not delude herself mto expec t'10g Franc arres ting way of Ioolein
is to
had an
1O g
seem ed to be saying to
going to be all right, the silen t passengers been taught how to love, but he ah h d she woul d neve r stop
fact every where and every·
her with their eyes, not their mouths. In . pleased at Adah's achievements.wou Ad ld k ope the marr iage toget her
thing seemed satur ated with happi ness. s. May~ e ~at eep .
achieving succes
camed
It was neari ng the end of summ er. The wind that blew until they got back to Nigen a. ch•evem ents Franc is
were still on the trees, but were be-
an autum nal nip. The leaves Children used to be one of e the
th grea_t a 1 eru·ence even the
Their colou r was ,
comi ng dry, perch ed like birds ready to fly off. .
appreciated, but tn
. Lond on, the cost' h. mcon ridev in them . As long
had fallen
yellow approaching brown. One or two eager leaves ~ll er~e d ~ss like this one, he woul d
g them, had little
few to matte r. As far as shame of havinbring
already, but those were isolated ones, too as Adah could home tnum p
trees still had
Adah was concerned, it was still summer. The . go on looking pleased. h n talkin g to
leaves on them. And that was all she cared about her nose w e. , lock
Adah did not tell him that she had held
She banged at their front door impatiently. Francis came
out, in
g like the woman neither did . she te11 h.im th at sh~o se nme
.- ~
o c-tt"rne
his loose, unbuttoned pale green cardigan, his belly bulgin . rea1. · u t until
· ht not ise m
were hangi ng '
because it would be dark and the woman ~ig
that of his pregnant wife. The tail-ends of his shirt the top that they were black. If only they co~ld .pamt th_ei~ faces ~ai~l~-
be=
tidily out of his grey trousers. He peere d at Adan over idea,
the first rent had been paid. She d1sm1ssed this
u~ h ·s rimless glasses, blinking angrily, wondering what
behav e so audac iously
it was
in a cause she knew that Francis would not play. Ther e failed w~ n~ :!
~at ~ad taken hold of her ~o make her rs. she could do but to hope for the best. Even if it all m
house where they were still like begga they were
end, she was thankful for the temporary happi ness
74
 e . . d"
the noticeboar , Francis
. xpe~1encm~. Francis started callin he " . ernent on
. "
Just like ordinary husbands did t l· r. darling , talking tobci
IJlS - the advertis
•·11-1-- • ' ·verioghead,
thetn to you.
to get the kids from the nurse o e1r wives.
It was like a stolen ho Shry, so that Adah
. ur. e was even be coul
He even volunlccrcd
d.do the adin•'
y~~:,t!i be} ininute. Be o
d wn soon to show
. if they wer e going
· • . minute.
:r~ nas might be in love with her after all
h~~ !lfu p surp rise s like this onc e in
fit:!:d &

~nk that
d It was look ing as dab rayed. The
Jus;:t~e bead disappir; please let it be so : t i!th bands
in
a while. Slie did n::~ to be given the rooms. to~ ded for wor ~- Ad f~eroernbered she
. to think that they mig ht fail to get the room
appointment would be too hea vy to bear.
J3:°et, now very friendly with Adah, did not
s The du
. .
two of th~ ;;;e t~: er her b~lg ing
ber coat l"""'." ,
::i~:;h
that, in less
mon ths, therde bwas
need much per· had not told the thw o:: Obi added to the gro up. Tha t wou l e a
sua sion to com e and baby-sit for them. going to be ano er t cov er the bab y
She was as excited as Adah, F the moment, she mus
ar:id they s~e nt the tim e ~fo re thei r dep problem for the futuie. or
arture
nice Ada h s flat was gom g to look. For, saidspeculating on how .
·
dow n the sta.1rs.
Eve n
mad e a flat. Did n't Janet, two rooms upThey could hear the ligh t s:~ r~ ~e
Ada h kno w? wom an did not mind
The nig ht air was nippy, but Hawley Francis was beginning to be co en; ta ed dow n the hal! way
Street was only ten
min utes ' wal k from Ash dow n Street. .At blacks living in her house. The stja oi~ eck
.first, they walked quickly, oni ng had arn ved ,
bur nin g with hop e. But whe n they cam and the light sprung on. Now the y 1 sho
e near to Hawley Street, thought Adah. The lights would certain y w them up for wha t
Fra ncis star ted to blow his nose, lagging -
behind as if he were go-
ing to face castration. they were. Niggers.
He look ed rou nd him , the excitement of Toe door was being opened . . .
the evening still wi_th At first Adah thought the woman was abo
ut to hav e an epil epti c
him , and exclaimed, ''Go od Lord, the tched at her thro at
place looks like a bunal seizure. As she opened the door, the w?m an 1
gro und ." ~uclosin as if gasp -
Ada h had to laug h. The laug hter of relie . with one hand, her little mouth ope ning ~-
f. Yes, the hous_e w~ ID t d togthei r full est
a tum ble- dow n area with most of the surr ing for air, and her brig ht kitten-like ey~ 11
ounding houses 10 ruJJlS, extent. She made several attempts to talk, a e d came Her
and othe rs in diff eren t stages of demoliti ut no sou n ·
on. The area had a d~
late air like that of an unk emp t cemetery. mouth had obviously gone dry·
Some of the houses 1 But she succeeded eventuallr, Oh, yes, sh~ f d her voice
thei r roofs ripp ed off, leaving the walls oun Hin th~
as naked as Eve with .00 from wherever it had gone previously. Tha t
fig leaf for cover. The bare walls could be v~ic
of houses bombed by Hitl er.
tombstones or the nuns now that she was very sorry, the rooms had e was te Ye! bot h
rooms. It was very stupid of her, she condesc Just gone. • h
Ada h did not min d the ruins and demoliti ended, because s e
on, because the ,nore ought to have told them from the upstairs win
insalubrious the place was, the more like dow . She wou ld put
ly the landlady would be their name down, though, because she was sure
to take blacks. ano ther roo m was
The y knocked at the door. .A woman's sma going to be vacant down the road. She poin
ll head popped o~t of ted to ~ome of. the
a window, like that of a tortoise sunning itsel waste land further down. If there were any
f. The head was ltk~ houses in the direc-
mop being shaken at them. The voice tion of her pointed finger, only she could see
them
strained, as it had been when it talked towas high and soun~ and Francis could see was tumbled-down ruin . All that Ada h
.Ada s. She hop ed they
She could not tell the age of the woman from h jn the morning. would understand. The room had just gone.
She was breathlessly
of loose-hanging curls. But there was som the small head, fulf nervous and even f cightened as she explained.
the owner of that head could either not see ething she could teU: Francis and Adah said nothing as the floo
prop
blind. Or maybe she actually did not min erly or was colour· out. Adah had never faced rejection in this
d of words pou red
started to shake, not from the nippy air but d their colour. .Adah directly. Rejection by this shrunken
manner. Not like this,
from that sort of cold piece of humanity, with a
that comes from the heart. shaky body and moppy hair, loose, dirty
and unkempt, who trie d
77
 to te ll th em th at th
ev1 we re unsw·tabl f
pr oba bly co nd em ne d - e or a half d,....,:..
ho us e wi th creaky sta
were blacks? i J - ~ Ind
T hq sto od there, as if ro rs. ust ~~ , 7
ot ed to th e spot Th e f
ho pe d th q wo ul d go
. Sh e be gg ed th em o~ce m . h
~ t~cn~~
~a t ~ e ro om s were
direction, and_Ad ah wa
th e lo ok on hi s face wa
go ne . H er little eyes
s su re th e woman was
darted :F=
going to scream, ~
The Ghetto -
"hat d" s ugly. Al l th e letters th
!e se em ed to be wo at form...1 the
rk in g themselves indeli l;Q WOrd
carvmgs on a stone. H
e was sta rin g at this wo
bly into it, like . .ans v,,ho ha d corne ~i geBnristaand-
to be lo ok in g beyond man and he seancd of "N
1gen rti es v,, n w as
he r. Sh e started to clo was another group in th e la te fo th ~ wbe . th e
She was expecting oppo se the door, fumly. Thc re f rne er e rn
sition, bu t none came. This group o n came · tio n en in ed
ut te r th e pl ea sh e ha
d rehearsed. Th e shoc
Adah could not Cftll still a colony.
under colon1~
Even ?..f er
a They
...,
w er e w e ll ed uc at '
. alified
never forget. k was one she would middle-class strata of i~ ian S()Clety. • •va le nt , qu
oo U ng or its . ~ rv
"L et 's go," Francis said. · with ~ secondary ric ic e, 'fh es e ~~re
al jobs in th e.Qv 1
Th ey wa lk ed away in enough to bold down de in w or ld p0litICS,
silence. Ad ah could no t wi th th e go in gs -o n
either to sta rt screami t bear it. She had men who were co nv e~ w ou ld so on be-
ng or talking; anything r like th e sla ve tra
head. She started tellin th at came into her who knew that c~ lo n1 fo de tli t th e outcolllC .
g Francis th e story of Je /~ e colonial in as t: ;
on, how they were tu sus. She went on and come too ~pens1veence - la :e s w er e fre ed ,
rn ed ou t of al l the de in th e same wa y ~
Mary ha d th e baby in th cent houses and how would be mdepend tin al nail in th e
Francis looked as ifehe manger.
.
en
when it became too exp sive to ke ep th et n, e be th ei r tu rn .
was in another world,
he r. Th er e was nothin
g
not listening to coffin was the independence of In di a. It w ou ld 50 00
try to keep up with Fran Adah could do but to keep talking an~ Nigeria would soon becOme
. nd en t
ul d
cis, though he was now :n ~ :d th at.w ith in de
chased by demons . Th walking fast, as if These groups of men ca pe nd en ce :r ob s,
en, all of a sudden, he cu . fo r seU-rule, po
startled. W as he going stopped. Adah was come prosperity, the op sh y va ca n . bs
to
But he di d not touch ki ll her now, she wondered?
the world soon that yo
her. All he said was, "Y
ou'll be telling
. and more money, plenty po
o
:~ ty e ha d to be el ig ib
though, thought these m_e it. n 1 lace to se cu re th is ebg1 1 ,
tb~~-~tr'
le fo_r
u're carrying another Jes n. Th e on Y!:i d They
will so on be forced to loo us. But, if so, you this passport to prospent m us t co m e to En g·
/ . "B ut Jesus... .w ~
~r
k for your own Joseph."
land get a quick degree
r, was En gl o
m La w an g
back to ru le th ei r co un try .
1s coloured. All the pic ab, was he not? So, to the English, Jesus W h~ could be mote suita
tures show him with th ble
you have . So c~·t you e type
see that these p! 9.pl~ of pale colour The reaction that follo ? . dd ea
. wed this .s~l Se n _r lis ati on sp re ad lik e
man ~d y~ refuse ~~ t~
e
~ a coloured wlldfue. R.esponsl e m~ 1· n hi gh Civ1 erv1ce p osts th re w up th ei r
"bl
I~ Fr an as was lis~enm a coJoµ!~~ !_~j_ly_iqto_their hom.eJ"__ jobs, asked for th eun, . . d , .
realised that Adah d,d g, he gave no sign of it. He probably gratuities, em ande d th ei r pe ns io ns ,
need abandoned their children ds 0 so to th ei r
He seemed to be enjoying to talk, because he did not hush her, . gav~ twenty p :n
what it said.
Exhausted, Adah stopped
her voice, but his mind
did not register
i\literate wives, and pack
Kingdom in seai:ch of ed the~r ba~s fo r
eligibility that would maeducation, m sear
at u;
o
• ~ th e U ni te d
peli~ibility. Th e
.
Ashdown Street. It dawn talking. They were near their home in ke th em free, fre e to t
ed on them that nothing free to
O
into pashy jobs wi th lo ng shin ru le _th eir coun: ~
would save them now. but a miracle back wi!gs. Th e eligib y ~m en c~ cars w_1
And what saved them wa ility th at wo ul d sanc
s just like a miracle. their old illiterate wives tion th eu de da nn ~
taking one of the newly re du nd an t an d wo ul d no
emerging graduate fe m t f r? w n ~n ~e lf
ale s in N 1g en a as
79
 hous full
a ~ife. Oh, ye s, th er e '\VelcolJlC to a . d ewh ite
was a gr ea t de al the United .es and a hapthpy fa ilu re
gomg to do fo r th es e m en ~ ~ r r
th · ~ eg os , ~~-
Ki 1 ..v, stud1
Neatly au
s
1~ se ar ch of th is dr ea m
c~ll it, th ey sold all , ab an
.
or rea lit y,
ngdoin 111.t
or whatever ou d .
~by: their ,...
t~e ch ild ren ~ only .;iay o
of hal M y~ it "'as e 'th
~ ;t
e
in g eh
. . . sl ma ste rs? An y ~ 0 an
rn
w ho
do ne d all they ha d held th eir co lo nt a f Af ric
lik e th os e m en in _the
ha d an d ~o llo w hi m .
Bi bl e wh om Jesus ha d
Th os e me n in th e Bible
told :~lli -
d y Thccidc to

had little to ~
Vlotn;°· a etting even w1 wh
·t1-'i way of g
1J0\Ud
"Cc
- d as long -
she was
o, discriminate betw t foeen e
ite . 'fh e se t o
th ed uc ate d an
an m a es ted
d th e un ed uc a
di d no t rn ak e
?n ly th ei r ne ts. Bu t
these Ni ge ria ns ha d plenty started to r th os e m en whish o . b
or En gl is or
Jobs an d ma ny , ma ny - wives, staC:, came later. Bu_ a·d no
ch ild re n. Th e mothers V1hite womcden not educated, t ma tte r; Ir be re do r ba d
th ou gh du bi ou s ab ou of these children, · ducat or it i hi te. If th ey re m
t th e wh ol e pla n, thoug ~t l d thetn with
wo nd er ed wh at wa s to h they might have it, e k, it did not matter..Shfe wa s W th ey st1 e
no t say an yt hi ng , ot he
wi ck ed wo me n wh o sto
be co me of th em an d the
rw ise they wo uld have
od in th e way of the ir am
ir offspring, dared
btt!1 branded as
G1ce
pangs r.
of
the conso auon
i\t about their am
i\i es
that after a\\, th ey
id
no t ha ve
at ho me , . d to wh ite "\IV
we re m ar ue
been p
os sib le at ho me .
Ornen.
If they re -
nd be -
O f co ur se , th e husban bitious husbands. That at least, wou of re ad in g La w a
ds pr om ise d to be bette th e dr ea m . d
wi ve s, go od an d ric h fat r hu sbands to thcit membered ~e~r o~ ig ::~ rd th ey bu r1 e
he rs to th eir children, me ~: :~ in de pe nd en t c: ~~
wo ul d all be pr ou d wh n of whom they roming an eht~ in_ ;~ in tm en t, t~
en an d if they came ba hearts. It wa s su ch a
Th e ch ild re n, po or th in ck from England. it deep in ~e l[ b1ttedr W dis as tro us ly, th ei r
in th e Un ite d Ki ng do m.
gs , we re usually overjoy
ed at having a f~ther . t put into wor s. he n the se me n fe ll so f be co mi ng ~
b1tte
Bu t wh eth er they saw the r o h Th e ·dr ea m o
wh eth er he wa s a be tte ir father agam, or dreams were cros e d wirthi n th em . -· , , .- bo dy •a - se-co d-
r fat he r fo r his go ing to aristocracy became a tea ity of be in g a blac:K, a no n
kn ew . England, no one ~
As is we ll kn ow n in such class citizen.
cases, many people were
bu t fe w we re chosen. usually _call~, . arne _ at 1e as t, M r
M os t of th e first gene
ration of . Ni gc n: There was one old Ni•ge ria · M r No bl e wa s h is
politicians, wh o sp ru ng
up fro m everywhere aft Noble was what they calle
n, th tim e nbu t .Adah ea e to
ence, jus t lik e mushroom er the mdepcn f d hi m at :m e hi~ mo rn
s, were from among the know later on that thi s wa th er an d fa tb er
th em actually ma de it; se men. Some.~ s no t th e n
they came back to Nige had given him. He was giv · en th at na me w he n be ca me to Englandd,
law degrees, an d a gr ea ria , equipped wi d
t tal en t fo r oratorical gli when he became a secon wh en he be ca me seco n -
mastered en ou gh politica bness. 11_i~ ha f d-rate pe rso n,
l to kn ow th is ma n, th er
ha vin g en ou gh fo od fo terms to tur n th e basic ~ropositio~-~ class. In the early sixties, w~
en Ad ah
e
r everybody into beautif were all sorts of stories go d ~ : t hi m. Th e sto rie
lef t the ir listeners lost in ul Jargon, w 1 ing roun . s ~~ re
th e mu dd le of long, jaw so many, so conf~sing and so th t he be ca me a liv in g
Some of these listeners -breaking words· co nt ra di c: ~ ;a s th at
sometimes wondered wh legend. Th e ve mo n tha t he wa s. a r~
not be tte r off wi th the ether they w: e wa s tol d to
white master, who would . . . th t h of a ce rta in ch ief m
tro ub le to learn the pid at least take e tired ov1l servant, a wa s the on1y so n
gin English which they ~
No t to worry, though; could understand. Benin City, that he ha d six . an d ab ou t tw en ty ch .ild re n an d
be w1 ve s E lan d to rea d La w.
wo rld statesman dema ing independent and learning to be a that he left them all, an d
came to ngak. ·t Th e lo ng
nded certain things. On .
versed in rhetoric, wheth
er
e must be wd l· and short of 1t was that he failed to m e 1 •
However, most of those it made sense or not! . .
H,s failure was due to a gross m1. scalcu\at·ion • Th e pens10n and
.
eligibles did not make it. men who sought the kingdom of the · .th
gh t wt h"1m wa s no t ev en en ou gh to
Li gratu,~ y money he br ouor
they fell on the wayside ke the seeds of that sower in the Bible, see him th~ou~h G ~tho
Matriculation or wh ate
ve r th ey calle d
came, failed to make a to be trodden upon by passersby. They those exarnmatl~~~ jus
se days. He ke pt fa ili ng
an d fa ili ng , an d
foo
in the pubs, got themselv thold, in England, sought consolation t as if he ha d ga mb led
wi th it. Bu t M r
es his money vand1s nt~d He
frequented the pubs - be involved with the type of women who Noble was un au would wo rk an d study.
cau
such unattached women se it was just after the war, when many ·
• \\ the offices his d,s . H e se arc he d fo r
were around, and that, of rk m a
wo•th appo•mted mm ·
d co uld th"nk f b t
course, meant w1 no success· He settled, ms • tead b 1 o , u
·
, on ec om mg a 1·1ft m
80 an at a
 . Mrf Noble.
tube st ation. Hi~ work was to shout "Mind the doors!" all dJf
and to colJ~ct tickets and sometimes pennies from fare-dodgers.
not deaden their
The sound was
eaa toltthe s~i::e
• was . .
d· bleating O
'~und men might m~e if •

t before they lost conscious-

•~ he was disappointed with the work and the situation he found
himself ~n, he drowned it in drink, frequenting pubs and oigli
clubs. H1s mates at work were not bad. They liked him, beauSe
~ey turned him into a jester, a down. They wouJd invariably ask
him to perform some African tricks, just for Jaughs, and Mr
Noble would comply Nobody knew what actuaUy went wrong,
. ~~
but_ Mr Noble started to behave like a ~ld. Who ~ so or
society makes us? Was it Durkheim? Well, 1f he had said 'ae
something to that effect, he was right in Mr Noble's case. ea
stopped being a man respected in his own right and ~ain he
c,ccas1on,
c Jown for men young enough to be his sons. O n one bether
was asked to remove his trousers; his mates wanted to see "re told
Africans had taiJs or not because that was the story tbey we of }!is
during the war. Adah remembered her father telling so~eunder·
friends something like that, but she had been too young ;at such
stand. When she heard of Mr Noble's case, she knCW ved his
stories reaJiy were told. In any case, Mr Noble retD~opulat,
trousers for a pint of beer. It was then that he becaITJ.:J~bJe''. fie
popular and generous enough to be given the n~efor his ,mates.
was such a noble man that he would do anythtng
even taking his trousers off! . . Jeech· fie
So Mc Noble liked the name. It stuck to ~Jm JJke a e a Jit_tle
found that by daiming to be Mr Noble, things ~ cJoWflJsb
easier for him. At Jeast he had an English name. Bu~ hJ!JternoOO·
performances nearly sent him to his Maker one quJet was toO
Adah did not really know what had happened. The story hat bad
illogical even for fiction. But peopJe believed that was woof so
happened. Mc Noble had his shoulders to show as a pr '
there must be some truth in it. busy jll
The story was that one afternoon, when ~t was not very th Ji~
the lift, one of Mr Noble's mates told him to operate :,,y,
manually, without the electricity provided. Mr_ Noble had ae1 VlaS
told them that Africans were very strong. On this afternoo_n h big
told to prove it, for a pint of beer. Mr Noble st?oped. J1ke ~ ait1
fool to shoulder the lift. Only God knew how his muddled _r to
told' him he could do this but, nevertheless, he _atte~pted itJift
rove how strong he was, for a pint. So?'1eth~ng m the is
P • d nd crashed onto him, trapping his shoulder. 1-l
groaned, tw1ste a S me made as if to run, but two or three could
mates got scared. 0
82
they were being · embered ~ve, JUS d and puffed at the
ncss. His mates tried to help ham. They heav~ amon the twisted
lift door, but Mr Noble's shoulder was trap~shed to \ospital. He
metal. Help came eventually, ~d he was was useless for life.
was not operated on, but that nght shoulder . him one
It later affected the whole arm, so much so that on seeing ed man.
would at first get the impression that he was a one-arm
The shoulder was permanently dislocated. .d h •
The railway authorities were very generous. They paa 11D a
l~p sum in compensation for his injury. It was trea~ed as ~
acctdent at work. All his mates came to the court to testify on his
behal~. ~ Pa Noble was pensioned off for the seco~d time.
. This time he decided to face reality. Hope of his eve~ becom-
:°g a l~arned lawyer was fast disappearing, so he inv_ested his mo~ey
n buying an old terrace house in Willes Road, Just by Kentish
T?wn station. He could only afford the cheapest, for he did not
Wish to be saddled with endless mortgage. He could not anyway
[ a mortgage, so had to buy cash down. Mortgages and things
~ ~t were for the fully employed, the young and, at that time,
lllainly forthe whites.
w There_ was a big trap in buying the house, but at that time he
~ c~rned away with a big wave of optimism and he fell into it.
by~ 0 ~e had three floors, and the two top floors were occupied
heardO sist~rs who had been born in the house. When Pa Noble
of thls, he told himself that the two women were bound to
rnove out as
rnan H soon as they knew that theu
.
new landlord was a black
cont.t was wrong. He did not know what it meant to be a rent-
Was t~1 ed tec:iant. He thought that owning a house in England
With e ownmg a house in Nigeria, where you had more freedom
the your property. He had never heard of a situation in which
1
la andlord was poorer than the tenants. He did not know that the
w could be so strong on the side of the tenant He bought the
house d . f all th · .
,vith ' r~mg O c ~provements he was going to make
the big rent he was going to collect when the L : t · t
moved out. wiu e s1s en
. But the two women not only refused t
increase their rent. which was less th o move, they refused to
two floors. Mr Noble went seveu.i ~n a pound a week for the
l!uston to moan about his fate b t :mes to the Town Hall at
• u ere was nothing the clerks
83

could do. It was the law. Yo u could
not evict a controlled t
you could not i?crease their ren
t, not even when you wa nte d:
the money for improvements .. Mr
Noble felt like going crazy.
That was not the end of his tro ubl e.
pubs, but not before he' d got him
He stopped going to~
self one of the women who fie.
que nte d the m. Th is wo ma n -
Sue wa s her nam e - started to do her
bit , ble ssi ng Mr No ble wit h mo re and mo re chil
dren. ltam eto ,
poi nt wh ere the re wa s no pla
ce for the se children to sleep. Mi
No ble we nt to the cou rt aga in,
but he lost. The old ladies .eR
con tro lled ten ant s. He mu st not
evi ct the m, even though the fortt
yea r-o ld son of one of the wo me
n live d wit h his mother and was'
jun ior ma nag er in an office. He
refu sed to pay more rent to Mr
No ble .
Mr No ble cam e to the end of . . of
his teth er. Hav10g lived most ID
his life in Nig eri a in a vill age
wh ere mo st people knew ~: to
use psy cho log ica l pre ssu res on
one ano the r, Mr Noble ~eo od,er
use this typ e of pre ssu re. He tol
d the old lad i~ that his : tbelll
wa s the gre ate st wit ch in the wh
ole of Black Afn ca: He ~1that she
tha t he had rep ort ed the m to this
gre at mo the r of his, an f this
wa s goi ng to kil l the m. He kep
inf orm atio n, eve n wh en he saw
t ma kin g a so~g and da : ~f tbcJ
we re frig hte ned , the y pre ten ded
the old la.dies in the str M. Noble
the y wer e n~t. But r sJe
kne w tha t the y we re beg inn ing to
be afra id of him. He "'~ t0~ the
gro und , bec aus e the se poo r old
sam e situ atio n as he was, cou
things, wh o we~e caugchologicsl
ld not pro ve hi_s P~can•bile.
cruelty in the cou rt. The y pre ten
ded to ign ore him. rted the
Mr No ble told everybody wh o wo
uld liste1?' tha t he had_ rep<> ·ously,
old lad ies to his dea d mo the r. Ma
ny Afn can s took him seri ""ho
because suc h thin gs wer e possible
at home. But the Eu ro ~,vife,
hea rd him rule d it out as the rav
ings of a crazy man. Hts
Sue, was am use d by it all.
Th en the gre at win ter of 1¢ 2-3 cold
tha t ma ny old people could not eve came. The we ath er~ SOID
bot tles for the milkman. Th e wal come out to leave thetr~
n ls it too mu ch for a ma n to
ls of Mr No ble'_s ~ouse
to feel the strain of the weather. He the
old ladies did not pay enough ren t. could not repair 1t because Mr
No ble shouted tha t his dead mother On e of the old ladies died . ,t
last Th e cold weather did not giv was acting on his behalf
wit hou t cease for weeks. In one of e up. It continued. It snowed
the cold weeks that followed,
the oth er sister died. The son Red
in
Mr No ble boasted, "l told them so.terror. .
My old mother kill ed them
I n told . Fra nci s mu st be ma de
8-4
\ 85
•en ds was
.,.., ble did no t te11 bis frild an d tha t
,, But what ){r d1...0that the sta.irs we re co
from her grave. the house \eake ' . do ws we re
and tha t the wi n ut bis
that the roof of th walls were dalllP th thi
th creaked, that e ng to tal k abo d k'l l
cled. It 1,ecaine e
So the story dung~ body knCVI that Mr No ble cou l ! .
him for a wh il~ ,
p0wec in hushed tones. : i :wh ich
this sto ryJ ~;ewo uld live in bis
Heenjoyed ~e_PoP~ wh en he saw tha t no
wh ite fam ily . So
but stopped en1oying it old too sha bby for anch· g up
the empty
house. The ho~ e was t~ fell ~w Nig
eri ans sna t m e Bu t peo ple
he was calculating on his f the hou sin g sho rta g . d. d
rooms. He was not una wa te.: in the did so
re. Th e few wh o ~ 'wa nte d
were always hesitant abo ut li ~ som
ew her e els e. No bo . y
just as a stop•gap unt il the y fou n . iab ly
ms we re alm ost inv ar
to stay for long. So Pa No ble 5 roo
empty. No ble had a vac ant roo m. Th ey
Francis and Adah h~a rd tha t Pa rd
knew about the dead sisters; the y hea abo ut his gre at paw er ove r
filt hy wo ma n wh o
others; they also knew tha t his Wl'fe Sue wa s a
. ts Bu t wh at we re
invariably stole bits and pieces fro m
te• r_ ten 7e~ mo nth s win ter
they going to do? Ad ah's b~ y wa s ue
md tord wo uld no~ cha nge
was fast approaching, and the u p~esen 1
his mind. Adah did not at first hke t ~ J et' hin ts and tal k
to Francis about their goi ng to see the to t e an 5 t on ho ing
No ble s. She we n P
it would never come to tha t.
d f the ex-
But it did come to tha t; wh en
tended time given to the m by the y had onl y two . ~ys O ft she
the lan dlo rd's soh ato r le ,
decided to talk to Francis abo ut it.
She ma de sur e she cho_se the
right moment. The se moments we
re usu ally wh en Fra nci s ~a s
pressed with desire for her . She wo uld
enc our age him to wo rk hun -
self up and then bri ng up imp orta
nt disc uss ion s lik~ wh er: the y
were going to live. On this par ticu lar
occasion, Fra nci s wa s like an
enraged bu\\.
"Why must you talk abo ut it jus t
morning? Wh y, you wicked witch? now at thr ee o'cl ock in the
Want his wife?" he thu nde red , sha
shoulders. kin g Ad ah bru tall y by the
She whimpered in pain, but she was
not goi ng to giv e in. No t
until they had discussed the No ble
was goin g to be born. It was al\ righ
s and dec ide d wh ere her bab y
~able in Bethlehem, but_that was aget for Ma ry to hav e her s in the
1t was always hot. No t m Eng lan d s ago and in the des ert, wh ere
mottuary in win tet, or so Adah had beewh ere it cou ld be as col d as a
 . e wen t on. Th~Y
to talk about it and th" certa in. Still th y his prom ise
. ' . d their steps un . d not for gott en
mor ning was the onl is was .the onl. Y way. Threc o,dock in Ill! were panicky an Nobles'. Fran cis ha
too late for F . y appr opna te time. It was a time when itw11 were going to the d
. of Wales Roa .
was the t . r~c1 s to run to any of his girl friends for help; t f the night before. curv ing into Pnn ce
o Willes Road was narr: w, the Que en's Cres ce~t _s1e ·it bad a
. de
th •~e w en only Ada h coul d meet all rus wants
· it ~ d,Pri nce of
e only time whe n she and she alon e, of all
who le wor ld, coul d satis fy him. Ada h knew howv
the wom~ in the
ulnerableFrm
Approaching the stre~ ro:, k, but the part thatll
gloomy and un~e ko~n g chee rful set of we - ep se
Jim t Edw ardi an
coul d b~ at ~at time , so- she sat by the edge hous es,
of the bed, spw!y Wales Road widened mto a d d fron t gard ens. Tho . h
dres ~ed, c~ve rmg her head with her hand s and
looking down atbtr terrace houses with beautl"fully tend et belo ng to a d ' ff nt ne1g -
1 ere
bulg ing mid riff. the clean, beautiful ones, seeme o
.
Her voic e too was part of the act, Jow, and bourhood; in fact, a different worl d. ' hum ble abod
hushed, but she e was s1~a !ed
pres sed her poin t. "Ar e we goin g to see the Nobl As was to be expected, Mr Nob le s a mig hty buil ding
es or not?"
"Ye s, yes, we will ," answ ered Fran cis quickly in the middle of the gloo ~y pa rt· The h
re was
treet shut ting awa y the
rushing to her. (ll[Ving right into the midd le of t e s_ f ·t 'wer e
~he dodg ed, and this anno yed her husb and dete rmin ed to
and he d~andcd: cheerful side from the gloo ~y one, as 1 1 f m the
Wh at the bloo dy hell do you wan t? I've said that ghet to, the
we will fJ' and divide the poor from the n~; ~e hou ses~ : buil
talk to them , wha t else do you wan t?" ding was just
. al whites from the blacks. The )':1ttmg e nd of
Ada h was now stan ding by the sink and felt This buil ding ,
like Jaughmr~ like a social divide; solid, visible and unm ov~~1e .
Fran cis, stan ding ther e all flush ed. How like d it poin ted
animals we allstand· built with red bricks, was a school or som e mg
~he n we are cons ume d by our basic desires, thoug ~n it face d
~t Adah, al to right in front of Mr Nob le's hous e, so that one ~id~
mg ther e by the sink, like a wick ed temptress Iunn of . His
g her ; ~ the good side of the street and the othe r the forb iddi
ng side . th
dest ructi on. AU that Fran cis need ed to be taken
for a gort • hausc needed no descripti~n. "Jus t go to Will es Roa
simp ly to bend his knee s. d, ask for . ;
"Yes , I hear d you, but I wan t us to go there to~or that black man's house and it will be show n to you,"
Jane t _had 5 ~ 1 '
rov.:, ~oiog and she was right. Francis and Ada h had little difficulty 10
we can mov e by the week end if poss ible, " she find ing
said, ma.inta.r the the house . lt was unmistakable.
her grou nd, her large , tired eyes lowe red. If she
looked up, It looked the oldest house in the stree t, sand wich ed
mag ic wou ld stop work ing. betw een two
The n Fran cis wen t on, plea ding like a fooJ, "Oh, 'll go houses owned by some Greeks. Thes e hous es were old,
too, ~ut had
yes, ~e y<1J ' been coated with fresh pain t and the fron t gard
to~o rrow . Is that all you want ed? Hav e I ever ref~s ens sttll ha~
said? Are you not like my moth er to me in tlus ed an~ n~aYC flowers in them . The windows had whit e net curta
ins and thei r
country doors had brass knockers. Mr Nob le's hous e look ed
I ever refus ed your com man d?·' like a mid get
Ada h h ad to laug h here. Her command, inde ed! fu.DCJY betw~en two giants. His was neglected. The fron t gard
en cont ain-
men can be! Her laug hter was mock ing but Fran How . for ~ piles and piles of uncleared rubbish and the fenc e need
cis took Jt ing. The whole house needed a coat of pain t. ed men d-
a laug~ o~ acquiescence. She migh t as w~Jl give
othe rwise 1t wou ld resul t in blows. She accepted in to him, n~:; f _Francis banged_the curved, black ened knoc ker.
•The knoc k was
what came to aint and uncertain and was swallowed up by
after that, for the rest of the night, hopi ng and the musi c blar ing
pray
baby wou ld not be born three months prematurely. ing that : from the television. It was the time whe n the
Beat les were still
chur ch bell chim ing seven o'dock , when Francis She beard . handsome young boys doin g their " He loves you yeah
yeah " stuff
side, like an exhausted drun k. It was all over, but roHed on h•S The .. cah cah"
hav Y ' Y ch . ' , ,
the Nob les.
they would see was e oing from the hous
e to knoc k harder. Adah felt like tell' e. Fran cis wou ld.
h"
to be quiet, otherwise th wo . mg tm so, b u t d ec1'de d
It was a dam p wind y day in September. Autu mn ugui ng who was right Jd w~~ go into . the Nob
was o~ its way les' hous e still
already. It blew the cold rain onto their faces The intensity of the knocks as stup id.
but thetc hearts progressed from the first mild knoc k
Q,<:
 to them. As
s atta ch e d t
e
to a fina l thu nde rou s one Th . e uall y blac k fing er f tho se unf ortu
loo
na
k at
house shOOlc and two"' d mps with tmy, . q inde d any bod y o a bet ter
tain ed win dow s, on eitbe; side whole burnt u , ed arm it rem th m to hav e are
as Jf they wer e hid in th . e of the door, made funny IDOfts e , ved his larg e squ
and left , like a mangw h: ~;;o;~·~
Francis looked despe,aldyriglt
e runn ing. Adah looked at him,
for the disloc~t
thalidomide kids. He
~am e nea rer to
then that he rem ~ d bat His eye s wer
. the whi tes of
e
her sile nt sad face k. his two visitors. It w~s d agai n, like a blm
was going to do. Francis not se~ ress ion tha t
tho ugh t b~t ter of it as mg w at he. had to glasses andy~red agai~:{;ows . Ada h cou ld p d ver y old
Pay fo . th. . Ma ybe rem emb enn g the price he had deepbut neverthe less shef got the_
l'l'lly set inside rly
dl'-·r wis e an
r com mg JS far he dec ided to wai.t· . o very th h the y wer e
The n they hea rd · f f those eyes ~rope k' d er by a pairreci se eve n oug
a pa1 r
O
eet shuffling on a lino-covered Boor. she was being loo e ov
, hew le's effu sive wel com e.
wicked qes. They were so ~harp, so P N~b
Th was not in too mud , of a huny
tak7 own er _of tbe f~ wer e war m but tho se
a little and someooc set so far back. Adah recoiled from Mrd
ng hrs hme , all righ t. The doo r opened to Go d to make Mr
pee red at them thro ugh the sma ll gap
. The person ;tood there for The words and sentences he utte re d
ting , maybe, about whether Adah wou ld cov er the two
Wh at see ~ed cen turi es, deli bera eyes, that face, that laugh! . Ada h 1~{ :ha t
and F ranc1s sho uld be allo wed in or not. Noble put on his glasses again. At in the firs t plac e, to cov er the
funn y laugh. The type of hollows.Was that why he wor e &lasses d t ee bett er wit hou t
The n, all of a sud den , ther e was a skeleton-like cavities? He certainl y seem e O s
sts in places like Tutenk·
laug h ?ne usu ally associates with gho
mad e by an old ~ - Iii N bl eplaced his
ham un s tom b. It was like the sou nd
for his head was hairles.\ them. . Mr O e ~ h •rts and
God heard Adah's silent prayers and clot
Nob le eve n look ed like a black gho st, hes, ves , s 1 ak
on his head blade. It~ 1 glasses. He had on layers and layers of
and he seem ed to hav e dye d the skin . a ll an °ld grand pa God
on top of 1t
d
th s hen
. -for
ised that the croaky 11~ old Jump
. ers and
whi le befo re Fran cis and his wife real look e~ as if . ey a
. . ce· the coat with sagging pockets. The trou sers
Was Pa N~b le's way of wel com ing them originally belonged to somebody big ger than
him ; on him tbey
to a smd e on• fa ' of
The nois e sub side d slowly, givi ng way mar ione tte. The f~t
been battered by gallons hung loose like the clothes of a tele visi on
face of an old man . A face that had s, whi ch sag ged on his
ost to scorching poin t by years anwint d~ Were covered with folds of woo llen sock
f dican rain ; bur ned alm
Afr b' · brf exh au~ ted. The who le l~t,
,ting th s, the elastic grips hav ing bee n long
0
man y
irec .1.•o11gerian sun ; and late r on ravaged bv
. t 1'1.T· ·tm at1
ankle
into two larg e, 111-
wm ·ds m · .Engla nd; a face that was criss-cmssed like •. /U •. •
J
e feet and the tired socks, wer e stuf fed e of bro wn leat her,
maybe occa s,on al 1"1' 11d slip pers was mad
bott led- up sorr ow. , d,sa ppo intm ents , and th hed slippers. One of the
rnatc
like an indelible legen e other was made of blue canv as. The man look ed exa ctly as
was all ther e, on Pa Nob le's face ,·ust her sons. He had a bllo lf
• People described him - like a witc h-do ctor.
wri·tten by Mo ther Nat ure on one •of O
inen t bones form ed• :::: Yor uba wor d for a
in the mid dle of his neck. Two prom "Come in, come in, iyawo." lyaw o is a t hav e look ed qui te
never Pa Nob le talk mus
ang le whi ch encased this holl ow and whe Young wife, not necessarily a brid e. .Adah
mea t insi de his gullet and wel com e," he said , sho win g
som ethi ng that look ed like a chu nk
of Y~ung to Mr Noble. "Co me in,
holl ow and the onlooker such a perf ect set of
wou ld dance frig hten ingl y in this encased his gleaming teeth. God was merciful. Giv ing ed life to his face ,
ing. But that was th_e las t . Tho se teet h add
w~u ld feel like beg ging him to stop talk teeth to such antrace ugly old man
s of hum anit y.
ped talking. He reminded IT\ak ing it show
thin g Pa N?b le cou ld do; he never stopall to the livin g world be-
one of a dym g old man eager to tell it lie drew Ada h and Franle cis towards him . The y ente red the hall -
e was silenced forever. way and waited for Pa Nob to shu t the doo r.
fore he passed to the othe r side and his voicoften, Pa Nob le would
he did very ve the sou nd of the tele -
. ~\l of a sudden, another voice rose abo e was a wom an' s lou d
To pres
gulp . s hom e his poin t, which
th~ the Beatles. The voic ' •
ng them . It was then that he authon,.
v1s1 orita tiveerand direct.
\o~d
. He open~d the doo r wider, welcomi-like • • p >
, those hands; they were
displayed his han ds. The y were so claw k, in fact they looked like "Pap a! Pap a! Pap a! Wh o is it> "Wh
al blac · o 1s 1t, apa . Pap a . . .
wizened, blacker than the norm Pa .. ."
88
 "Vi sito rs!" Mr Nob l · t her
the first thin g that cam e in o
the atte mpt. The lum p ~ c~~aked, his old voice almost t hesitate to tell you
aacki . would no
he repe ated this t.
. ,
•? is thro at danced furiously "Vis':g i~
•me m a lower k head. th u h, main ly due to
her
tremb ling h . •ors, . or thre e pile s of
figu res into th 't . Her visitors relaxed ~h~ lumped toge ther two for
Th e s1 ting-room ey, as e ushered the two Ada h and
e over -hea ted room th bl . . .. Mrs Noble got busy~thers dry, to mak e roor am iles, fishe d
sphe re all com bine d t , e h arm_g telev1S1on, the airless atioo- clothes, some drp, blin d dive into one of th~
insi de Th o gree t t em m one big whiff as they went sir~ ght- back ed
Francis. She ma e:ed it ener getic ally over o
side rabl e e :~m ~as sma ll. A larg e doub out a towel, rub
le bed took up a con• . d
h 1'ch po 100 0 the room. Opposite the bed was a table oo chairs and invited them to s1t . own . h.ch he bun g on a nai'l be· .
~ wer e clus tere d all sorts of child ren's articles · feeding Pa 'Noble took Adah 's whLte coa ~ l ff his coat beca
use of bis
t~les~ a plas tic plat e, cloth es. In the cent re of this hind the door. Francis refus ed _to ~e ~;at It was then
jumbl~ stood the that Ada h
maJ eshc telev ision , trum peti ng away as if deter shabby jumper, so he swea ted mist ake in .allo wing
mined to make its her coat to be
pres ence felt ami dst the sobe ring jumb le. te1lised that she had mad e a m h they reali sed that they
Children's litter was
accu mul ated ever ywh ere, on the floo r and on taken. What would these peop le say. w en t ? The y coul d see
the chairs; even the . .. b t ospe ctive tena n s •
~all ~ we~ e not spar ed from little smea rs. Piles were not 1ust v1S1t ors u pr d oon kno w that she had two
and piles of doth-
mg 1 ~ diffe rent stag es of clea nline ss lay in that she was pregnant, they wou l 5 to be easy to ex-
distu rbed by the nois e. Sitti ng very near
uncomfor
A_ clul d was slee ping on the bed, appa rentl y too table places.
tired. to ~
other children as well. All that was 0 ?t 01J ;g
plain away. Maybe they ~ad not n~ttc e · 0 eld
•
she mad e fran tic
the child, with h attempts to do her brea thing exercises. She h in her bulg e,
feet stret ched strai ght in fron t of her, was d th •
a woman. Mrs feeling the pain. She wou ld relax a f ter they had ma e e1r
Nob le.
Mrs Nob le was a large -bon ed Birm ingh am wom
and still prett y, with mass es of aubu rn hair
her shou lders . Her blue eyes were direc t and
an, still
hangi~g loose kcd
Y= enquiries.
Mrs Noble was deter mine d to play the role of th
hostess to the very full, quite obliv ious of Ada h' s thou
e per
feet

candid and Joo . . ghts . .

as if they were dete rmin ed to find out strai ght "Oh\ " she exclaimed as Ada h was settl ing on the
away what Franos 5 chai r pro-
vided . " Oh, that chair is too hard for you." Ada
ys susptcio .1
and Ada h's busi ness was. Tho se eyes were alwa •• us 0 h jump ed. Th~
peop le. Tha t hair of hers , hang ing Jong and woman's eyes had not missed a thing . Wou ld Ada
thick, and curly JO h like t~ sit
P:ms , mad e her look like a wild gips y beauty. on the bed, it was muc h more com forta ble, muc
If h softe r, you
rmg s on, Ada h wou ld have swor n that Mrs Nobshe had had ~ know what l mean." She gave Ada h a good wink of
her blue eyes ,
le was the t a wink that was meant to be conspiratorial. But Ada
wo~ an who appr oach ed her weeks befo re at h look ed bla~ .
Queen's Cres c:J But Mrs Nob le roared with laugh ter. Whe ther she
tellm g her that she wou ld be luck y with men and was
have man y boy frien ds. Her eyes were now peer
that she -wo with or against her, Adah could not tell. But she learn laug hmg
ing at them: ~rorn ed later on
her wide face, seem ingly unsu re of how to recei that whenever Mrs Nob le felt she had crack
ve ed a joke , she
Ada h invo lunta rily had to say " Hell o" . She mad their visitors- laughed like that, forcing her listeners to laug h with
her whe ther
of mou thing it, because the television was still bJarie a great shoVI they saw the joke ot not. Her laug hter wen t on
and on so that
wob bly smil e as well . ng. She gave • even Francis, who seldom smiled, had to join in.
fectious that woman. She was so in-
Mrs Nob le's eyes leapt into action. They danced
their centr es twin kling like dista nt blue waves on humorously, Tea was served in chip ped cups and mug s. Ada h's
a sunn y day; she big mug, over-sugared and too milky. arriv ed in a
shou ted, welc omin g them as if she had been
waiti ng foe them all
her life. She jump ed up smar tly, surpr ising . "You must drink for the two of you," Mrs Nob
bulk , from the b ed of jumb le and start ed ly nimb le foe her large kmd\ y. le expl aine d
to fuss overthem , her
eyes brig ht and laug hing all the time. Adah shrank back with fear, avoiding Fran
She was warm-hear ted, cis's eyes Ada h
kind , frien dly, loud , and unre serve d ; the
type of wom an who thanked her aloud, but in her hear t she cons igne
d her· to her
90 91.
 o,aryo
awle
d "'I!ll u arrye
ould st o h n ve
M ak er. If on ly sh e W do,,,J th er Icroa ke , u
er natter, the air Would bo cd or ra
·en ce d. ho pe yo
d W ith th ei r~ M Noble simplyanlau ~h ,
pr oc ee
fo r th er n to N ob le di d equest. r d mexpen
B ut M rs e talked about CVCrythiq& i.t • of an ap ol og y.
no t sto p, sh ver/, ,,V<ff• young
•b ou t no th . . yar te d to 1aug h to hetor--
•'~!:/:,.1t7~°;; 1 t she WOOi!~
" · Sh e SCem_•d to feel tha e di.,. Adah ,, Francis sa id
:
by wa
fa ili ng
in to th e
as
.
ta ki ng F. ~r ~~ ~i \h er to
'
pi c_by aski~g he r if
is su rp
he r ch
rised Adah becausn.
. Sh
_•re was any silence at all ren had..._
ild
e she did"' "~=~
n. e's only • woman,
soo"Sh

•:~: : ; : iN-:
1 ;2r:r ~:,~ ~t=
si_
::
n
~~
d th at sh
t! A da h
e st

kn
fe lt betrayed, bu t sh_eng
th th oo d. Th ey p!OO ite wo ma n, fo r.
k g
e N ob le s kn ew th ey had ot be ; childr< Thit. n. i wards any wh
ed in that_snu le. th room they w er e as ki
~o w at this vi.l friendship click g to ge t e
they w er e paying them something. They were gom
a 1. Y al so k?ew w hy en doing a great deal of
gossjpin& e.
ne ig hb ou rs ha d be Pa Noble was too old for Su
N ,:•CJan , but they '"
ey ~a ve no t ta ke n to English food much
N o, th
fo nd of ch ip s, re pl ie
d A da h.
ilof"
re n lik e fis h an d ch ips. Ours will not Wee bo
""J\11 ch ild an d away they go, just lik
e~ !
1
to es , bu t yo u fr y th em
ro:'5t pota or ld lik e fish an d chips . It' s~ "'" '"
th e w
th i? k ch ild re n al l ov er said absentmmdcdly,
, no t ju st En gl is h, " Pa Noble
n~ tio na lfofocuod
se d on th e television.
h1s eyes apa, did 1"" «I
w ife lo 0k ed at hi m curiously and asked : "P . __
li is were lit tle ?"
fish an d chips w he n you forgotten th et t e,a d ,,i.
Papa, w ho un til
lif e.
th
li
en
e
se em ed to ha ve
sn uf f
took ou t a small tin ofn wh«z_ J,adc
:'t ,ad
l~p_ t ba ck to
to his wide nostrils,
the
ministered th e st uf f lf up rig ht and pu t the snuH ~b,nd•
_ jol ted _ hi m se d
~neezed, th en o- o,n g co at po ck ets cla pp ed hi s
daw-IiJc
in to on e of hi s sa 00
an ·
. er her
wa y, hu nc he• d up
ht•S st,·fl s h Ould
an u" ?• lu ra i so ,t of nicely, ma.Icing be
10
•
irl es s he ad . .His wife sat back re
rubb ed h, s ha g, laxed, ready to
co m fo rta bl e am on g th e pi les of clo th in . other
se lf
amused. m be
le to ld th em th at he was born i~ a tree. H15
Pa ~• N ob
m ilk un t;J he wa s alm ost twelve. H e bad tiO He
fed htm on brea st jo in the ~e o ~•
ca us e he wa s by then old enough to was taken mto ik
in th e farm work. li e ne ildren in Nigeria were brought up ~ •
wean ed be he
ver wore clothes until
army. Yes, he said, •IIodch fo , pe op le di ed of dy se
nte ry ev ery day. e
th at. Th er e wa s no al an d the
ice in th e ye ar du rin g th e ya m festiv
ate m ea t on ly tw wh en he
th er 's go ds . In fac t, he on ly sta rte d to liv e
fe sti va l of hi s fa ly when
An d, of co ur se , he sta rte d to en jo y lif e on
ca mmeettohiEn
s Su an d.
gle.
he
ha d tails, Pa
fe th at yo ur fa th er st
ur wi
"W hy di d yo u no t tel l yo
t. Sh e fel t sic k. W hy mu Pa No bl e
ah bl ur ted ou
N ob le ?" Ad wo ma n?
sc en d so lo w? Ju st to be ma rri ed to thi s
de
92
 r
Looking back at that time, she still won dere d why she neve
wha t
thought it odd that she should be doin g all the worr ying abou t
tbey were going to live on why she' and she alon e, alwa ys felt she
8 · those she loved
was Ietttng ' dow n if she staye d away from work ,
that
even for the sake of havin g a baby . The funn iest thin g was
she felt 1't h
an _was er duty to work , not her husb and's . He was to have
Role Acceptance pac~y life, the life of a matu re stude nt, stud ying at his own
She got h lf tish
Town st ti erse ready that morn ing, and hurr ied to Ken
One day, week s later , whe n Adah , Fran cis and
theit _~o r:;! rnen wer: ~n.. Whe n she got there , she reali sed that the railw ay-
child ren had settl ed in at the Nob les', Adah felt
unwd~:! ,ould ~use sh aving one of their go-slows. She did not know of
not for hee ~~ so completely
this,
isola ted from othe r peop le' that if
· by niD~
to work . She felt unco mfor table and unusu~lly he~;
ha~e staye d long er in bed, but she had to be JO the
li~ :ally did th.
1ng that
r v1s1ts
h
to h l
er P ace of work , she wou ld not know any-
friendship 'tltpened outside her home . Fran cis did not belie
ve in
thut y. Sad, and feeli ng very sorry for herself, as shh baod
¢JO
on such days , she drag ged hers elf up, envying ~er
ngh
hl~
d
up, ~
to~
0
o
ne or tw~ J he on~ys W
r t\l;ice. Their b
e ovah
friends he was begi nnin g to culti vate were
1't
ness peop le, who came to their room once
was still havi ng a good snor e. She felt lik~ waJci Adah of
ai;
buJll,nttf ~ere the liausa ags were so ~ig that all they remi nded
for the shee r joy of it. She was just stretc hing h~r 0 ,
?~• on the verg e of pulli ng him up, when the p,ece5a ing
to bd, eey rnight even :~~a wk~ rs m Lagos. Adah did not mind them
ms1d e her gave her a gent le kick. It seemed to be ~ ~as fol- ~~tah people could a faith ful husb and out of Fran cis. But
th
p;~e._ They never r~~t :~ her at ~here was goin g to
the
be a rail
Wha t do you think you'r e doin g, eh? This gent le$~ 50
j_pt~
e of mon ey,
lowe d by arrow -like punc hes. One of the punc hes 1'h cis had maintained. Th papers, i~ was a ~ast
that she was jolte d into reality.
babY it tbt
ha\'e tbe
1ne: Were so com letel ey had neith er radio nor telev ision .
medi a.
Acco rding to her calculations, she shou ld have tbeld ""at ugh Francis inir u!n~ t off from any type of mass le·s to
d V~ stairs to Mrs Nob
begi nnin g of Dece mber. As a matt er of fact, she cou
ofl tbe
the ch their tclev ision ~dah y went down
baby any time, beca use it was almost due. It was alrea Ye
co: she .,,S I>atti:~rnan would be a b~as . b:nn ed from goin g there beca use
did not
bee, the secon d day of the mon th. The baby would _not th she didarty like Mrs Nobl e din uence on her. Adah
· S etch· 00 own lot, so
secon d, she told herse lf. The actua l date was the ni~1 defin not rnakc any rotan was t~ busy with her her role as
havin g a morn ~8 s~be .ttl~ 'l-l_ed for her by her hus1andest.
She sun ply accep ted
sure the child insid e her was simp ly ues? 4ncrc was .
babie s do morn ing exercises in their moth ers' tumn
they a crowd of in
chec k it up some time.
r t,u"'-
in s~oo , like Adah Were c::: ers th7re on the platf orm. Ma be
But one thing was begin ning to wor.r y her, thoug h. HJab ~ ch cty, or maybe .they though t the . from the gom
p etely isola ted . y
gs on
she thoug ht A doct" '• angcd thci .
Her boss was always look ing at her, when the could though mutt r . m1n_ds in the night· The radw ayme n woul d have
not watc hing, wond ering. .Adah had lied to them , to
cring hkc angry 1.. __ - crow · t1
d waite d , p at Jen
she out/': -r.::- ~- y
sayin g that her baby was due early in February, so that have ~ h•d
4 nc pushes and
She Wondered wha nudg_ es insid e her b '
stay as long as possible at work . They woul d th~
mon ey to tide them over till she starte d wor~ again . Fran ~s it1I ~ere o~ the platfo~!;c kt~e devil Wan tc:;:~ e more deter mine d.
m right
been convinced that it woul d eight foe him to work ~~ng ark swt, briefcase and ti h nd huge gentl er to ?o· aScrea
be
Chri stma s itt the post office. So if only .Adah could work
f':ronsthe "'?Oden bench es for he g tly rolled ema.n with bowl er ha
as possible, they woul d be able to pay
their ~ent, /ay f'll have a long tune ~ an~ llloti one~ brell a,
ookc:d like that of a li ttle Wlllt, " he .,,. :d er to
vacat
sit down
ed one
"""
of tht,
e
child ren's nurse ry and put some mone y by until sh got bo -... srnili . . we ma
y. .Adah th ng. His great b . f y
enou gh to go back to work . ankc d him Sh ig ace
95 · e was sure

he was a headmaster of a bo
she did not bo the r to find out. ys' school. What gave her the idea
Sh e sat the re. No tra in,
bu t mo re nudges. Th e aow
drift away. On e or tw o keen d started lo
int o the da rk tun ne l as if
ies we nt on peeping and peeping
to co nj we up the train. But
no train came.
Ad ah kn ew by the n tha t
the railwaymen had been on
strilcc that
da y for he r sak e. Th e pu she
s, tho ug h no t constant, were
mi ne d to be ign ore d. Bu too deter-
t wh at wo uld Francis say?
wi th fea r. He wo uld accuse she, w~ n~C:
tha t the y ne ed ed he r mo
he r of laziness and would rem
i;lcssl
plea.re giv e
ne y. Oh God, she prayed
Francis a sign, any proof to ma
k, him
~un J;
be/1tt1t/'t;,
you can see, dear God, I am
in pain. Not just sh y~ / w~ '
in
real pain . Th en sh e sta rte d to laycd
thi nk again. Suppo~mgh e.~
it up . Sta rte d to scr eam as dcs.
if the devil was bummg w: t~
Th at wo uld be nic e. Sh e wo - She
uld ge t the sympathy shFe
de cid ed tha t tha t wa s wh . tO do ran05 • WoUld
at she was go mg
be giv en the mo st ter rib le • W ll he d
pro of he ha d. ever ~ecnSh ~
ask ing for it, an d she was it bappY•
, Go d ha d he ard he r prayer
he r. It seemed to hav e for go
go ing to give 1t to huI~- :r
s. W ith tha t tho ug ht 10 h
fel t ha pp y. Th e litt le per son
ins ide he r see me d to
tte n ho w to kick. It seem
beed
~nd, she
h y flitb
:Ebe hJf-
ing its elevenses or som eth ing
lik
Bu t ho w wa s she to start scr e that. b as hav
eaming wh en the ba Y ~ she ing
its elevenses an d she was fee
ling no pain at all? Shou ,
start
the pai n, jus t to give hersel
f
fear gri pp ed her . She sud something to scream ~ : · the othel
.Anothet
denly remembered that WI
babies she ha d had , scream
child itself. She could hea r
ing was as exhausting as .ha • the
vinglVho
the voice of he r mo ~~ r-m-la\V
ke pt telling her , wh en Adah of1'.leD
wh o screamed we re cowards, was in labour with T1t1, that ;e les5
energy they had left in the that the more they screamed: t}]eir
m. So when it came to havi~g
babies, they were sapped of
str ed all
their energy away screaming ength, because they had_ dra i~ uue
somehow. W he n she was pre like mad. Adah knew this t~
left
school an d though they had gnant with Titi, she had_ Just no-
body warned her that first bir taught her some health sc~ence, at
time she ha d screamed, not witths take such a long, long time.. 'fhas
taking so long. And when h pain, but with fear, because it w
completely unconscious. Bu the baby was actually born, she was
read and read, as if she we re t with Vicky she ~e w better. She
what it was that was happening going to study medicine. So she
kneW
in every stage. All that knowle
dge
96
was
cd omchow' bceause there he no motheri-
seemed to have evaporat ' ~ Be cau had heard..,
se, ho m what s as 11
in•law to tell her wh~t to g:~ e
mo the cs dr ug s an i ~~
tegas
sa me gas
in London the midwives lt sucely co uld not e . ?
affair worried her somewhat. 1f it was,
you use on yourself when you w~ nthatod do yo urs elf in ld kill
en ou gh ? Th at '!'o~
bow would they know wh en she d
her, no doubt. Then she wo uld not
the lit tle pe rso n ins ide hoe~,
. see row an d go to sch oo
l.
then she would not see Ti ti an d 1 '
V ~Y g the as? sh e wo nd
no,it is all so unfair. W he n do they 1 ere d·
s vc on e re ~ too mu ch . En
g·
She thought again. lt' s ptobab\y
~and is a silent country; ~eople
wh en Y°: ~ bo ttl e up the
. are 0 ir fee l·
mgs and screw them up tig ht, lik ta u~ / . in he r pa ren ts dr an k
e the 1 lClt g th bo ttl e
at home. 1f you made a mi the gi n
stake an d un co rke d e
would bubble out. She ha d see e~ be ha ve
n En gli sh _me n an d w~~
like humans once or twice bu t be ha ve d
wh th
like humans when they w~re str y wa s it tha t ey Y S tu
ag gli ng ou t of the pu bs on
day nights? We\\, if they wo uld a r-
giv e he r ga s to sh ut he ! up th
she would not scream. Sh e wo uld , ~:
him. She knew Francis, she'd rat
a god or goddess she did no t kn
where the gas thing wo uld sen
face Fr an cis an d ha ve it ou
he r ha ve a fig ht wi th him tha
ow . Be cau se ho w wa s sh e
d he r?
t w~t
n wi th
to kn ow
She went home. Sh e tol d Fra nci
s wh y sh e co uld no t go to
~ow
l the railwaymen ha d o- onne on str ike for mo re pa
wo rk ,
was for more pay because she y. Sh e kn ew
hf the impatient cr~wd of innoceha d he ard the an gry mu rm uri.
nts on the pla tfo rm . Sh e tol
ng s
fow the man with the um bre d him
t°~ 0
he~ and how the s\ats of the be
lla ha d va cat ed the wo od
en be nc h
nc h ha d hu rt he r po ste rio
d him how they ha d al\ waite
d ho pin g tha t by wa iti ng the r. Sh e
~m ~o w conjure up a train
fro m its tun ne l ho le; sh e
y wo uld
~ it had a\l come to no thing tol d him
, for the re wa s no tra in, an
homYe.had gone home, including he rse lf. Sh e ha d ha d ev ery-
d to co me
~a nci s was sti\\ in his pyjamas.
He he ard he r ou t wi th his
:Zd ed like a wicked spy in
a Jam br ow
ah how she knew tha t everyb es Bo nd film. Th en he ask ed
od ha d
passengers te\1 her that, or was h .
of the strike what she was cooshe y . g~ne om e. D1 d all the
ki ma km g it all up ? W as the
him that morning when she tho story
~et the n. He thought at first tha :gh :h Wh en she loo ke d do wn at
into a pu lp ftom the way she w t ~h e e wa s.a sle ep ? He ha d see n
She should have thought of \ ~a s go mg to sm ash his sk ull
a:_ ~k ing at him wi th thi ck ha tre d.
ter story. Sh e sho u\d kn ow
97
tbo ug h tha t sh e at ha lf pa st ten incuth
e
ma ke all of th ..
so n ins ide he e Would hge~c Sh e sta rte d to rse
lf too . em suffer, includin8 thcper. the sermon .of hd1 ' pyJamas.
Ad ah co uI~ an d he rse ch. g to herhe was sb. ll m is Th er e we re so ma ny
. no t sa y an yth .ing . Sh e did no t k pita . m h me •
b
ee n Wise in no t ch oo . ilin g all he r so ;~ ~n g the y we re so
de cid ed on scr ea ,n. sin g
I tng an d faced the
ether she had
th e oth er alternati no\V Wh ht fo havt
ve. She oug
roorn10g, e7
h~rl ~o ~e
.i:i
fam
aw
ily
for
tha t
sp0
the bo ys l~ah
gre w we nt on he ari ng ab ou t
ab ov e th e rub ies , bu t th
e
or ev en the a Jupiter or Lucifer creat~reswa .
in g the .A// ~g~ s. Thoreu h 'ch
nd
an ge ls mi gh t evgasha \Ve gith~ sgtnsnecial superhuman h e pn ce s
en ave lcom-""' .J her sinD. ID r-- ' d came ou t of th e oth er.
. e u,a Ch I w i sh e lov ed -, this virtuous woman w os let hi m
na gg ing co ns t rai. nt ca,n . very much . ......
T't • .u1en the we nt in thr ou g~ o~ e ea~ anto his ow n vo ice wo uld ab ou t
h . W ha t of sermon ing to do
t e an ge ls cou Id wa .it F
e ag ain t..,>
i i and Vir..... well, hstenm~it wa s sh e was go
w~~':!: ::.:"gog=
,. lV7 't least the joy of his
no w sh e was ha t oth er
h an ge ls· h d
t e . or
111
n
alo ne to po n
d
er wd b kic kin g no t he r fro nt, as to
d that those leave her aki g it difficult fo r he r
would inh~rit"th;~i~es;~ sai like to this bab y, wh ose leg s see me . to e
ca ge ma de
':1nof He a~ en ? Sh e \Vould w ~ m n 1. n th e lit tle
so me tim e, With he r ch1ldr liked, He babies did, but her ribs. Th is cis ha d sa id
. Francis could go \Vhere he y lym~ ac r:5 , do n Fr an
co uld tak e ca re of him se lf breathe. She imagined the ba~ ha d because
Th e nu dg e ca me .· s, kic kin g aw ay wi th care ess 'ba nth . sh e
ned kicks and by her rib
mo re. n s an . i~to se ve n
,6 fol low ed by the determi ago tha t he ha d h sh
sh e ~elt lik e sc rea mj :ga f>cca..~. "-· only two day s
ow n nb s an d br ok e it
m . hg , . ut sh e tol d he rse lf no t to' - UK' Jehova h Go d too k on e of his Y e
En gli sh mi dw ife
ig t giv e he tha t mi gh t sen d her, not and ma de he r ow n cag e fro m them. Th at ~a s w
0
t th . . r ga s an d little pieces s of a m ~!
. e be au tif ul an ge ls
ing the A/le/11ia Chor11.1'
. but to sh e was ma de fro m th e rib
f fis ing was called "wo-man" because , " woma n
Lu cif er wi th his ho rn v·
, when ick y go t into a ternr·· nn sense wh en he wa s talki ng
. · Then
s o . re him sel f. It ma de som e
like mpo":nd
anfd sp at ou t his R,·ce K ns pie s d T'it,• went as silent as the tomb may be reg ard ed as a co
· . ' an being an English word which erp ret ati on
re us ing to tal k h beauti~ ha t wo uld be Francis' s int
ful ch ild ren ;:i w-:' o wa s go ing to tel l them tha t they were
in g ~o t_ickle them till the
y laughed, and
word, "wo" and "m an ". W
of the W est ern Ibo wo rd for wo ma n, opoho wh ich
ha d ~o
ck y sp at ~ut m :;: a~ fo le okei? Francis wo uld ha
ve to bu ild
Vi
st
art ed tal kin g, no n-s to ~7k .
Kn sp ies al~ ov er your fac
e a bad rad io that ha d lost
e, and Titi
its switch? relevance to the word for ma
sto ry for tha t, be cau se the ex pla na tio n fo r th
e rib str uc ·
Pth ano the r t ho w
he we nt on an d on , ab ou
ge ls co uld ke e ying
~h e an
by he r ch iIS ren e~ he av en, an d she, Adah, was sta hue would no t ap ply at all . Bu t
. .
~igh~ he re
· e~ause, even though the
baby was Jy· the virtuous wo ma n.
ing in a fun ny wa h was go ing to liv e to see no t just he r grand· Jehovah was going to bless _d 1~ beh ~ to
mistake, an d allowed he r
ch ild ren bu t he r Y, s e nd children as Well. At least, if they were Adah had probably made a accused he r of no t be he vm g him .
is
no t all blo wn up g;e at- wa show on her face, for Franc him lik e
cam th o pie ces by the bo mb ! she thi nk he wa s lyi ng ? W hy was sh e loo kin g at
Th en e sermon p · Did He wo uld
e
h was a gr ea t on e for preach
ing by this religious fervour.
sermons. It wa s alw a J ran cis
ov ah Go d sai d that? He got quite excited in the W or d of Go d. Th e W or d
that. Ad ah was ha v·ys
e ovah God said this, Jeh sho w Adah that it was all written p typ e of clo th
~ r; : aft m her ose cover was of tha t chea C books. Th e
baby, so, wi th eyes ~~g
er the last onslaught fro 0
! ~o d was a book whLa
i', e e eyes of the pig 's he
ad at the s to bin d ch ild ren 's AB
butcher' s, sh e wa tch ed aze d th which binders used in go pa pe r the likes of wh ich
on e
st pre a'? ing to ma de of
thi e~ed to he r husband pages of the bo ok we re
e difference be tw ee n the
leaves
he r ab ou t the dil ige nc e:~ e virtuous woman, whose pn ce was for blo ttin g pa pe r. Th
above rubies . Th,·s v1•rtuous wom . would use pa pe r wa s
F
was yapping about paper was tha t blo tti ng
t an ranc,s of that boo~ and blotting t wh ite no r
would wa ke wi th the 6 0
of the code. Adah wondered wh nt
ere
wh ite , bu t the pa ges of this book we re no
ar~ :~ ble ach ed the ~e ins
fin d with brownish fibres like tin g the
to ;
sh e w:15 go ing . Bu t on we
th at wouJd wake he r up bu t we re cri ss- cro sse d
Francis, on the mo rni ng of i:t second of December. Jehovah God yellow
ok were pictures of Ad am
ea
of a hand. Inside this bo
would bless such a w
sid e the ga
nu mb ed by th
tes . Ad ah :::d
h Ol h
er hu sban~ would be respected too
to ask which gates, but she
rse lf,
was
out-

Francis
apple_ an d
covenng the u sex
~v e tal kin g t~ the snake. Th ey
. They did not look too un
· ·
bo

ise
th
ha pp aft
Y
the
ha

y
d fig leaves
er eauld
wo
t· th
mg ve
ha
e
e s ow. Fancy, she sai d to he l though F ranc15 said they we re, oth erw
e w app e,
98 99
 been witho ut the 6 1 cd blood , when sh~
h add needd gave it. F rancis was
that they had know ! ~ves . Covering themselves r e when she 'th the over-
-1 t,ecaus th Wor , an
was suppo sed to do g od an~ evil. Adah did no ike that Proved srnT~t
fllldc h~r Franci s forgot e ld no longe r cope w1
apple s from the C now. Str1p herse lf? Refu t know what she having t t, an who cou
Which neede d w~~~~e~t ~Frands himse lf was ;~:e :~any_
b
trous ers worn by N· ~
Jgena n
he
drum
trouse
me
rs were
d
as b'
,g as
rs, an his sex was inside these
the
lllott
PYJamas
ba88J
,
: at,ad rnan, _just ~~ou nd himself _in. furiou sly for The Trut !
dcinanding : : : double n~w'
He bent Free throw ing
100:-r
the t
dren' s cloth es this way_
it and walk ed qui
:ly
~ggy trouse rs, dangling th. of Shall Make you ' rf made a dive for . alling her back,
Big Ben. She had never see tsBw_ay and that like the pendulum that. Adah saw her sea h~rd Francis shout ing, c e comm anded ,
~lock like that woul d h n '8 Ben, but she was sure that ab' like
towards the door. Sheh bo k She must come back, hhe sounded .
Just like that.
It dang led much more f . I
ave a pend ulum. Francis's sex was dangli~!

back again , because he w uno~ s y now, this way, that way, and
Adah
ause he had found t e o

Nero in Quo Vadis who accuse

. .
:t . To Adah
:ause he had not finished hav1~g c:J~i ers of dying witho ut his
t

proof of what he had b as exc_,ted. He was going to show permission. H d n's surge ry at the Cres-
was goin to een sayin g about the virtuous woman. He Adah hurried, wobbling, to D~ :h s: arse snow of the night
He couldgnotg :!:~ 1
boo_kkcalled The Truth Shall Make You Free.
qu_te ly enoug h. Adah knew he would start
cent. It was a horrid day; grey, with e td ot melt becau se the
anoth er sermo n on before, clinging to the groun d. It cou h:a cloud s was hazy;
then h 1 Parad ise, then he would ask her to read a passage, ghostly sun that shone from amon g e
th vy It made it very
sa e wou d_ ask her if she understood, and she would have to too hazy to have any effect on the Shlbb om s~ow · dded just like a
..5~• ty~, she did under stand it all right He would then call her walk. But, anyho w, s e pa
wife bee J h ah . . . .c dangerous for Adah to
ts er not Every 1e-
mal b j • ' ause e ov God ordam ed 1t so.
duck, first to the right then to the left. . ma be wond ered
b ~ e •eve~ was to be called a sister and every male believe or
ra Th~ .Y th t like a
Maybe people passed by her wond ering .
roth er. It dtd not matte r wheth er the femal e was your wife k ~ ' "f she
t h d what it was that was the matter with her, walki ng like
mo er. It did not
f th ma ter w ether the male was your husban or duck. Perhaps one or two peopl e woul d have lik~d to ~k :~; g
ave
a er. AU believers were brothers and sisters. Sometimes Adah deter mined
;;:d
-~t
B1
to wond er wheth er God really said all that. One thing she did
was tbat the greate st book on huma n psychology is the
needed any help but got scared off by the
them all. She walked on, and did not see the peopl e. A 1 t ·1f
. t ~d
she
think
had She found a corner in the surgery and sat down
f •1 ~- If you were lazy and did not wish to work, or if you really felt like screaming here she could and nobod y wou .
.
kia.a ed to 15 _make your way in society, you could alway s say, "My had th,s pai~
it odd. The thing that troubled her was that she
b 7~ om . not of this world ." If you were a jet-set woman who
e teved tn sleep ing aroun d, VD or no VD, you could
always say "'hich disturbing though it was was not bad enoug h to be tbe
re
labou; - those hot ones that m~e a mad perso n of any ';' m~n.
0
Mary Magd alene had no husband but didn' t she wash the feet of her kept pushi ng ~r
She did not understand it. The perso n inside
O~10Lord? Wasn 't she the first person to see our risen saviou r?
blacks, this way and that way, so that to sit down was troub le; t? ~~h;
If, the other hand, you believed in the inferiority of the trouble; to walk more trouble. So she sat on the metal ch3:1r. in
is • ~~
you c~uld always say, "Slaves, obey your masters." It surgery shifting her bottom about the seat like someone si~ting
of the greate st of all books if not the
myste nous book, one ' thorns. She fixed her eyes on the poste r on the wall which sat
greate st. Hasn 't it got all the answe rs? r.
of "No Smoking" and explained how smok ing causes lun~ c~nc~
But the one thi?g .Adah could not stand was when a group There was a drawing of the ribs show ing the fluffy lung inside it.
that suit-
peopl e took a portio n of the Bible, interpreted it the way Adah wondered whether that was the drawi ng of a man or worn
~.
. She
ed them and then asked her to swallow it like that whole How could one tell? Francis had said that men have more nbs
mind it if Franc is beiiev ed it ex- one
becam e suspicious. She did not
if either of the childr en than women An<l not only did they have more ribs, but that
cept when it distur bed his studie s or peere d again
thoug ht of this of a man's ribs makes all the ribs of a woma n. Adah
d. The of
neede d a blood transfusion and he refuse at the drawing of the ribs and concluded that they must be those
IOO 101
 WhY m us t she_ gh in
o a.rn-
an
red d de ci de d
a wo ma n. Th e rib s we re
too fine, too reg ula r to be Adah looked at be ~ sc:d heno w. d F an c1 s a
wo ma n ha vin g to wo rk • a man's. Fushancy• bulance, when she ha to
r th at sh e an ; th e ho sp ita l gi- ve ?
• ha vm g to carry ba b'ics who kept p tog at ho me ? H ad no
the ir mu mm ies ab ou t an . 11 h ·ng to have canctr that she would have tbe ba by nt an d ba dn t
d, on top of it a • avi le') Did not tht fo r th e co nf in em ~ '
as we ll. W as Ev e the on them a list of what she ~a s to et cna.r-
ma n Ad am ea t so me too
mo st of the pu nis hm en ts?
ly pe rso n who_ate the app
? W hy wa s 1t tha t wom
e~ bad to bear Francis demanded an gri ly wh
ricd, buying all tha t stu ff?
b: Cr sh e wa s pr ep ~n
~ d 't Fr an cis de ci de
d
f
ng :{ : th e si x
a
. It wa s no t at all fair.
pounds they wo uld giv e he r 1f
. a n d th e ch ild at ho m e wo u_ld be
Th e pa tie nts sta rte d to tn·c1c1e ou t e by on e She Vla5 not in,. sh e ha d at
hu rry to go. Al l sh e wo uld on
he ar at ho me wo uld
beFrancis and hiS useful? Adah ha d ag ree d wi
th hi m. Sh edwo ~ be an
ld ha ve th e du l
ser mo ns. Sh e wa s be tte r h as A woman -ho ciJDC home and cam six po un ds . y ne ed to bu y
h .. Th er e wo ul no ho
aft er he r wi th a ba by as off w ere s e w · dged her to go lll, . two or three nig htd res ses , us ec oa t, or be d-
red as ne w carrots nu h no
Sh e rep lie d by tel lin g the 1n e VIOD)lll room slippers, an d no ne ed fo ne ed _to bu y a y th e six po un ds
wo ma n to go bef ore ::·b r a to ile t ba g. eS ,
wi th the ba by tol d he r tha efore. Adah would feed the m for a we ek .
t sh e cam e aft er her, abon
tol d he r to go in all the t to start her She told the do cto r sh e wa . ab at Un iv er sit y
sam e. The worn an was utly · s no t ha vi ng tb e b _Y
ow n ser mo n ab ou t Ad ah Adah 1g- College Hospital bu
ne ed ing the do cto r ~r g:e t at ho me in th eir ro om t W 111es R oad · To e
•
no red he r an d sta rte d to
pu zzl e ou t all ov er agam
the r the ribs doctor asked he r wh y sh e a . in al l th e
, ha d ch an ge d he r m 1n d
op po sit e he r be lon ge d to a ma n or wo Th e woman stared at trouble she ha d tak en in bo • ~ee g ita l
he r, jus t as if she we re a
Sh e tho ug ht be tte r of it an
ma n.
d decided to tak e he r red
f
crazy wo ma n Jet loose ro. an asyllJIII·
:i, up to Dr
because the wa itin g lis t wa s
was f
ok ing he r in at th at pa
lon g. Di d Ad ah no t kn f
rti cu lar ;;,_o 5
ow tb at e fo o
d
per ect the re an d tha t sh ·th b·1 t of a re st ro m
Hu dso n. Th e wa itin g-r oo { {or the her family? Ho ,,; wa s Ad ah e co uld do wi a
m was no w em pty ~x go ing to co pe an yw ay d
domestic wo ma n. Sh e, too ci0 ,nach- She ? Sh e on ly ha
, ha d a red face, and a bi ~nc room, did n't she ? Th
was not pre gn an t, because g: Jike cott()l\ en wh at ha d go t in to
ready to be spu n int o thr ead he r ha ir wa s wh ite an d
too close, too reg ula r to be . Sh e sm ile d at Ad ah .
fln/ teeth 91ere er refuse to go int o the ho
sp ita l? Di d Ad ah no t
he r he ad to m ak e
kn ow that m an y
~ was niCC· Women Would jum p at the ch
an ce ?
Th e charlady wa nte d to tal hers, bu t anyhow, the sm• e lk to her, 1n e do
bu t how was she to kn ow
k. Ad ah wo uld have liked
to ta babY Ir thatd ctor we nt on tal kin g Sh e wa s a gr ea t on e .
wh '1fish Oct_or. Sh e wa s an gry . fo r ta lk in g,
ing across the mo the r's tum eth er the lad y ha d heard 0 ~ a tdling 'Wis.:: Wishy, sq ue ez ing on no w, wa sh in g he r tin y ha nd s. w~"h s Y,
my be for e! She decided ag st e sm all ha nd ~g ain st
h~r aoythi~~- Bu t the wo ~n
Lake Francis s sermon, it ma n we nt on talking of this d that. fo y. Ad ah fol low ed he r
mo ve me nts wi th he r ey
th e ot he r, wi sh y.
we nt int o on e ear and cam an of the 0
; sermons, sh e tho
ug ht. Bu t th e do cto r's es . W ha t a da y
oth er. e ou t toe -: an d ou t of the oth se rm on di d no t go in
~e charwoman sto pp ed tal
commg down the stairs, the kin g because they could hear vo•~e
. es sh: 1 er. Ad ah lis ten ed an d all
h do wn int o he r mi nd . Ho ow ed th
w wa s sh e to tel l D r Hu e wo rd s
woman wi th the baby like a voices of the do cto r an d tha t ?o un td to ha ve the ba by ds on th at
of t in the ir on e ro om to
have alarmed the doctor nocarrot. Th e woman with the baby ~U S ma yb e\ bec~use the six po
un ds
ea rn th em six
he r "de ar" , le_ading her up end, for she dashed to Ad ah calhll~ it w or e,g ht or nin e da ys? Thwo uld fe ed th em all fo r a we ek ,
mess the stairs all over. just like a big egg tha t mi gh t break 811 \)o u~ ha t he r hu sb an d did e do cto r wo ul d on ly as
no k he r wh y
motioned he r to climb onto She led Adah int o the surgery, and 'lllo t
· An d to an sw er tha t, Ad go ou t to wo rk an d ea rn th e six
was examined on a chair. the bed. Adah could no t clim noman tha t h~ r hu sb an d ah wo ul d ha ve to
b, and she
"Y ou r time is too near to . need for hu n to ex ert b« :lic vc d in Ar ma ge dd on tel l th e do cto r
be comfortable. Yo u Wise he wo ld h1 ms clf too uc h · th. . So th er e wa s
phoned for the ambulance
straight away. You need ashould hav e u 1osc h.1s sh arc of
too lon g, an d the tel lin g the m 1n 1s wo rld , ot he r-
now . I am sure you'll hav
e your baby in less than tw bed to rest st0 ry be . Sh e jus t tol of it wo uldkingd om . Th
hours, if all goes we ll." enty-four d e tal e wo ul d be
since she ha d to ge t Frthe do ct th ma ke he
an cis to r ha t sh e worulcry· So sh e let th e
sig hed. Sh e tol d he r to hu d ra th er go no w
102 rry h O P on e the mi dw
orn c. Sh e wo uld do ife . Th e do cto
th e ph on in . ~
10 ~
 Somehow Adah
such a Ion t. ?1anaged to get home. The journey had taken her
bell b g tme, Wtth a rest here and a sit-down there She rang the
ecause in her h t I F . .
k Sh ' urry O eave ranc1s, she had forgotten her
key. in ~ scolded herself _for this. She was always forgettioghcrdooc
ey ngland. In Afnca she seldom carried one: your door was
always open. In the afternoon people would all be out on their
verandas, taJJcjng and eating ;ugarcane, coconut or bananas. lo
En~la~d. people locked themselves inside; they made a paradise of
thei! livin~•rooms, because they didn't stay out a lot, not like thq
do in Africa. Francis was always reminding her to take her kq
whenever she went out; one day Mrs Noble might be in one of her
moods and refuse to open the front door for her. What woulf:,
do ~en?.She would have to stay out and freeze. Just like that .
stupid wife who did not do what she was told but kept 1~
back aU the time, and was turned into a big lump of saJ.~ th,t
lump must have been a big one. Did people make soup WI salt
tYPe of salt, salt made of a woman? Eerr, it would be nastycnh,
that. She was happy that she was not born in Sodom and Gorn<> She
She rang the bell again this time pressing it Jong and hard~
did not care now if it an~oyed Mrs Noble or Mr Noble or .,as
Franc~s. She ~id not care any more. What she did_care aboU~nell
Fr~nc1s getttng annoyed and appearing in his ~ea~ this
PYJamas, with the baggy trousers and his thing in it swmging yed
way and ~at ~ay because he had no underpants ~n. .Ada:{J~-
~o God to 1nspue Francis to remember to put on his wooll h b•d
mg•gow?· The ~ressing-gown .fitted well; it was new, for
?,Ought _it here 1n ~ngland. But the pyjam~, though they v,,on·
:ad •
Made 1n Great Britain" label, were bought m Lagos. .Adabld do
d~red who told them in Britain that people in Lagos cou f the
V.:•th~ut superior things. She remembered looking at some O b•d
bisauts Mrs Noble was giving .Kimmy, her black dog. She le
touched the biscuits and had it not been for the fact that J>COfi...
•
were watching her, she wouJd have tasted one. Were those not those
"'"
very same type of biscuits sold to people in .Africa, and were d bet ·
a:
not the very ones her Pa and her uncles used to being for her An .
brother Boy from the army barracks when the war was over.d d~
how, they had not died; they had even thrived, for those har 'they
sugarless biscuits were good exercise for their teeth when the
were kids. Did they stiJJ sell such biscuits now in Lagos, when . g
devils had taken hold of the Japanese and they were paurm
luxw:y foods and articles into Lagos at two a penny?
10.,f.
She prayed harder now, ~ause up the r_oad thshe saw two women
hers of the
riding madly on two grey bicycles checking e mun h t Their
houses. She saw their black shapeless coats and black ~s. e
shoes were black and shapeless too. Just like men's shoes ey wder . ·
• ·
Adah guessed that they were the m1dw1ves · t O help
coming e11-
• her call
vcr her baby. Mistakenly they passed her, _but ~dab d_id no~ bell
them, for that would give her a few minutes m which to rmg th
once more and to tell Francis to cover himself up with the woollen
dressing-gown if he was still in his wrinkled pyjamas. Her
prayers were answered, for Francis came down, hasty in his anger,
but he had not only taken off the linen pyjamas, he was dressed f~r
tbe day in his grey flannel trousers, cream coloured shirt and his
pale green cardigan with a criss-cross pattern on it. Just _as he was
about to open his little Chinese mouth to ask her what 1t was she
lhought she was doing ringing the bell like that when she v:-as
surposed to carry her key like a talisman all the time, the two mid-
"ch•ves
ee . realised their mistake' and wheeled their grey bicycles,.
t nng themselves like two children who had discovered a hidden
~easure_. They did not mount their bicycles, but pushed them along,
e chains making sounds like "tuk tuk, tuk". The two owners
bes· gfinning
'Nere · · from ear to ear as they ' trotted along theu
· b"1cycles
the•de th~m ~ke lame horses. One of th~ midwive_s was English;
superior air was unmistakable. Her hair was white, at least that
Part Of ·
ho •t that had escaped from under the black hat. She was b'tg·
ned, in her forties and had a determined look. The other woman
~ her assistant, younger and foreign. She could be Japanese or
t •nese, because she had a pair of those peculiar eyes that seemed
r~ be sunk into people's heads. The young woman had a face as
d
uo as a perfect 0 . Her mouth and nose were too small for her
f acc.
The grin left the faces of the two women as soon as they
realised that she was Mrs Obi
•s~~ Y~ueacLEnglish?" asked the older llJi.d ~i fe with the
White hair. lt dawned on Adah that, to the big midwife, if you
couldn't rea<l_or speak English, then you were..ilht~r.a~e. Adah did
not want to be regarded as an illiterate, so she told her that she
could. Then the big midwife with white hair and authoritative air
asked her why then had she not called them sooner? Had Adah
not read the instructions that she was to call her at th,: onset of
pains? What did she think she was doing, being so bloody
clever?
xo5

"R~k , rook, she's breedi ng," gasped the young nurse with the
f ace like an O .
Adah tried to puzzle out what this statement could mean. Yes,
she was breed ing, de.finitely. She was having her third baby, ~t
everyo_ne knew that. Why should the nurse make so much nolSC
about at? If she were not breedi ng she would not have called than
in the first place. ' SOmeth'ing. She opened her eyes; they, were descen ding the
The big midw ife who had probab ly worked with her assis~t
for some time unders tood her perfec tly. For she went on: "Thats
what I mean . Can't you see that you are bleeding profusely? CoOJC
h ~~ confused. Adah saw the fat cheeks , the pathet ic baby eyes,
on, up to bed."
se nu_rst, w en
Did "breed ing" mean bleedi ng for the Japane
she said "rook" , did she mean "Jook" ? Adah was 1earomg. two
One finger, •ces
They went on exami ning her diggin g into her.
fi , lk' 1·o loVI vo•
. nger~, three fingers ; on and on they went, ta mg . did not
10 the1r specia l code, or so it seemed to Adah. Her paJOSO
more-
get more acute, but aJJ of a sudden she could take ~ head , '\'rappe~:d not: Those ambulance men in black suits had her all
Franci s, who caused it all, standi ng there staring, Jike a p~ sJike ,
at the butche r's, standi ng there at the foot of the bed, I red then
refere e impati ently waitin g for fair play. Adah remembe.cky and
that she had read or heard of husban ds who became pant as sure
worrie d in case their wives died. But not Francis.. .Hehwd to bt
Adah wou!d Jiv~. T~ him Adah was imm~rtaJ. S~e JUS~ ~jn_g5 ,
t~ere,_bearin g h1s chJJdren, workin g for h1m, takmg hts
l1stenmg to his sermon s. f the
_The room started going round and round in aJJ th~ col~ur;; eyes
rainbo w. Franci s had now turned into Lucifer. His wtck 9/'5
were_ glazed as if he wore badly fixed contact-lenses. C()ID. :e
w:arm g a robe of fire, he had horns bigger and mor 'ttinB
pltcated than those of a stag, and his swords were enu ot
flames . He was telling her that she was being punished for ~
waitin g to read The Trulh Shall Make You Free. Her runtl.lthe
away to the doctor woman was causing her aJJ this pain. nen .
plea.rures with Trudy, if she had been a good wife, a virtuous
woman whose price was above the rubies. . . • •
She heard the bells, the ambul ance bells. But they jingle d as if
lhey were Peter's bunch of keys to heaven telling her that she could
only hear the jingles of the keys of heaven , but she would never
go there. She was going to her Lucife r husba nd with the horns of
fire. Somebody, two men or even three were lifting her onto
er
eaky, Noble stairs
f Then she saw Vicky, clutchi ng at Mrs Noble 's breast , his little
"ant~a.yed to God to send her back whole to her childr en. She
ning to call out to Mrs Noble to tell her to wipe Vicky 's run-
COminno;~ to tell her t~ pull Titi' s pants up, becaus e they were
in a : w~ - the elastic was slack and she had forgot ten to put
lllouth ew f'ece. She could not. Her mind was talkin g, but her
\'oice of the ::i.1ru~g r~d blankets, and they were hurryi ng her. The
Adah s ig mi~w1fe was urging them on....
The dr~ bade into the world of dream s.
husband f ams were like before . Troub le. She could not run to her
She could or help because he was still carryin g that sword of fire.
ringing _no~ see Peter with the keys, but she could hear the bells
saying, •..~nging. Sometimes she heard the voice of the big nurse,
nurse saidur~, hurry, we must hurry." Then the voice of the little
r\lnning ' Gdood Rord." She tossed this way and that way
roun · Ies. To run to Peter, trouble ; to run to'
·in circ
Francis trouble
so she ran rou. d d . . .
n an round, until a bag, mighty voice cut throug h
to her: "Y
&oing to ou know what we are going to do, madam ; we are
~::,x
'No~'t fccr:.n e
th out fo! you_. It is jus~ a littl_e prick and you
moist hand Y P · ~c bag voice was stall talking and anothe r
S_he felt it ::-: b:;a~~ ~ her thigh ~ith someth ing needle -like.
1

voices of the two women floated in .. . one finger, two fingers ~~r like a shower of blessings. t sec anythtng. Then peace descen ded
"dilati on" used over_a nd O e
then she heard the word "dilate d" or There was peace eve h
again. Then somebody covered her nose and mouth with sOIJ'I 'Nas now a boy of five •rywFranc1s er~. She had had the baby and it
"rtOsi)er ous fa.rmer . They had th . was .
rubber stuff. So they were gassing her ... Francis's voice kep~ no onger a Lucifer, but a
1
and on, counting down like the persistent bells of death. So JS rooms, airy veranda s. She -waseu _o~n house, large with spacious
was death, this was what it felt like.. . . . the ~racte d juice of some ripe sitting on the verand a sippin
g
She could not have the baby.... Too big for her, poor_thi~~- laughing. She and Francis · F ranc1s m:ingo cs. They were talking and
15 was rcmm · d.mg her of their
Then in came Francis again. If she had not interfered with
X07
106
terrib le time in Lond Thank God they got him out in time. He was so hungr y, he could
laugh ing .•. becau se _on. .And she was laughing, laughing and . .
they were ve lt had happe ned such a long time ago when have eaten up her insides.
vent sch00J .ry {oong . But now it was all over. Titi was io a con· "You've got a boy," the nurse that was holdin g him said un-
ch "Id m nglan d and Vicky was at Eton. There were other necessarily.
Th ren as well! but they were too young to go to school abroad.
F ey . were staymg with them, wantin g this and waatiog that.
She smiled her thanks to them all and drifte d into a peace ful
sleep.
h ranc15 was so happy and was comin g over to her cane chair, kissing
e~ very, very softly , telling her how virtuous she was and how bet
pnce was above rubies . And how all the other farmers for miles
and miles aroun d had sold all their farms to him and how he DOW
was the lord and maste r of several farms, miles and miles around.
What more could a man want than a virtuous wife like her who
had helped him achiev e all this?
Then the troubl e came back with the word "virtuous"• On and
on rolled the word. Then all the colours of the rainbow ap~
again, red, blue, yeJJow, pink· vou name it, it was there, aJJ ..C
. bo ' ' written •,y·rtuoU
1 S·
ram w colour s, and on each one was •

Virtuo us and more virtuo us, so many of them. So confusio~

. f I rs ano
V •rtuou s here and there so confus ing was the riot o. coher OU J
heao,
:...... ~uusness that she did' the only thing that came into
V.u.Lu
She scream ed, high and Joud.
On and on the scream ing went. She would never stop. . ht'
Then she stoppe d aU of a sudden . Someb ody was smacJ? ,n~at
on her thigh. That someb ody was calling her ··madam · 1t,d
wake up now, becaus e thef sur-
someb ody was urging her to
finishe d . She tried her eyes; yes, she could open th~• Sh:Js of
veyed her surrou ndings . The men and women were J1ke _angth re,

not covere d in flamin g red blanke ts this time, but in

person with a
dean;hlt;ae
light, clothe d in white. They were smilin g down at her, lyJttg
spl .
f
sheets, soft and immac ulate. The only
blood on him was the big man. There was no doubt about ,ti, by
was the person who had cut her open, to take out the funny
ever
;er
o~
that had Jain across her, instead of lying straigh t like
child. She thanke d the big man with her eyes, foe she was std! '\1ie
from scream ing, and from the cutting open. They sensed that
t
was asking them for her chiJd.
They brough t him. He was so big and so hairy that Adah w~/
.first frighte ned. He was not only big and hairy like a b~by sard ••
but hungry like a wolf. He did not cry like other babies, _he wu
too busy with his mouth , suckin g his big fingers, swalJow ,n~ th;
th
wind. Good Lord, was that the child inside her all e t,me
1:08
 der Adah's bed where sh~ was
The other one looked up from un d d greeted her with a
h ther stan an • ·•
screwing the nuts f or t ~ 0 , d th•15 but just 1n case,
watery smile. "I don't thmk we H nee ' number one and
th
finished the second nurse. Both of em, nu;~: down, attached it
nurse two had turned the bottle of blood ups d 1·t but just
to anothe; tube , but left it like that. ·'We may not nee ,
Learning t/.;e Rules in case," nurse number two had said. Adah
The nurses walked out briskly, as briskly as they had come. . d
tu.med her eyes to the woman on her ng · h t, and the woman sm1 1e
Adah woke to find herself in a big open hospital ward. She was oo
a bed at the extreme end of the ward next to the door. Surveying and asked her how her tummy was feeling. Adah tried to answer
the ":hole scene with her tired eyes, ~e recalled her old school's back, to tell her that at that moment a kind of mincer had been
d~rm~tory. But instead of the beds containing young, black s~on~d inside her tummy by some angry god~; t~ t~ll her ~hat
gigglrng girls, these beds contained women. Some were not~ tlus_ mincer seemed to be bent on turning everythmg ms1de her mto
roung, but most were young mothers like herself. Th~ were
mg, or
:!i ~ ruce neat pulp; to tell her that the bottle with water attached to
er le~t arm was placed there by those nurses and doctors t~ help
. most of them were·, one or two were trymg . to l,uzZ- th~ mincer mince her inside very quickly; to tell her that while all
magazines. The conversations around her went on buzzing,
·
mg. Th ese women were all happy and free. They seemed to have ~•s mincing and dripping was going on, her body was hot, her
known each other for years and years. 'd not lips parched like a desert wanderer and her head swinging round
She was ashamed of herself, because somebody, sh~ dithere. and round like the tub for spinning cotton. But Adah could not say
kno~ who, had decided to make a fool of her. Sh~ was 1f1I!~e Lil· ~~ 0rd - The rubber tube that passed through her nose to her mouth I
I
a_ll ti_ed up to the bed with rubber cords, just like t!te lirotD bet a seen to that I

Th ·. II
liputians tied GulJiver. There was a rubber tube runnJng f ethin& d ey were kind, those women in the ward. For the first few
a_rm conne~e~ to a bottle of something like wate~. The some drip h:~~ :hen ~d~ was deciding whether it was worth struggling to I
like water ms1de the bottle dripped, a drop at a time, ~d th ed to 1b nto this hfe, those women kept showing her many things.
would run through the tube and into her arm. Or so it seem stil~ seemed to be telling her to look around her, that there were
her. This drip was on the right-hand side of her. Jo· the many be~utiful things to be seen, which she had not seen, that
On her left was a big baUoon-like bottle white and deaf•. e yetre wer~ still several joys to be experienced which she had not
side this otherwise-dean bottle like the ones ~sed for making ~•~t sti\\exahperienced, that she was still young, that her whole life was
.
10 ' t JO I ead of her
, was some muddy water. The water contained some SOo.
The water looked like the running sooty water on a railway_JJoe on as S~~:?u\d n~er. forget one woman, who looked the same age
a wet day. They, these invisible people, had tied her to this sOO~ Yea s Ma. This woman had been married seventeen good
of rs, and she had had no children. Never miscarried. And then all
bottle. They allowed a rubber tube joined to it to run through he
?ose, t~ the back _of her mouth. To talk was difficult; to move
1mposs1ble. She simply lay there, trying to puzzle out why she VI
w: th a ~dden God decided to visit her, just as He visited Sarah
soe ~ -of Abraham, and she became pregnant and she too had ;
being singled out for this treatment. w~~n ~s woman never stopped showing this child around , even
As if aIJ that was not enough, a young nurse marched in with • k s e was not strong enough to walk properly Adah d 1· d t
stand, like the one attached to the bottle with the drip, • nd now that the woman had had tow ·t · no
stationed it near her head . Another nurse soon foHowed, carrying and she got tired of admiring thi:i b:event~en ye~rs for her son,
a bottle half-filled with blood.
which stood out angrily like elect . _by with thick brown hair
noyed because the tube in her mout ric hwires. She was the more an-
d.d .
"Ah, so you are wide awake. Good!" the .first nurse said by way
dom to talk to the woman to t ll h i not give her any free-
of greeting. ' e er that everybody in the ward
110 XX J.

~
 had had a b_aby or was expec ting one, to ask her what it was that
~as so spec1_al about her little son anyway, showing him around
like that as if he were a prize or something. But, thank God she
never had the oppor tunity to say this. Four days later, when the
tube was remov ed, the woma n next to her, whose husband looked
old enoug h to be her father told her that the woman with tbe
baby with the wiry hair had h~d to wait for seventeen years to have
a son. Adah gaped . Seven teen good years! She wanted to ask all
sorts of questi ons. What did her husband do, for instance?. ~he
imagi ned hersel f in the woma n's position. Waiting and wa.ibng
for seven teen years for a child that was taking its time to m~e
up its mind wheth er to come or not to come. She tried to ima~~e
what her life with Franc is would be if she had given him no ch~ d
She recalled Titi's birth. After a long and painful ordeal she -~
com~ home to Francis bearin g a girl. Everybody looked at her ~y
an ."~s that all?" look. She had had the audacity to keep e\'Cio tell
waitin g for nine month s and four sleepless nights, only ed
them she had nothin g but a girl. It was nine good months wast ·
She paid for it, thoug h, by having Vicky soon aftcrwa rds, t She
Suppo se she had had to wait seventeen years for all tba ·7 •te
· h er d1ed
· of psycho
wouId h ave e1t • l pressu
logJCa res or another VII
ecJared
would have been bough t for Francis. He would have d
h 1.mself a Mos~em, for_ he was ~c
once a Mosle m when he w,.., his
yo~n~er. Fr~ci s_ was. like the Vicar of Bray. He _ch3!1~ dah
religion to suit his whims. When he realised that equipping A of
with birth-control gear would release her from the bondage •
child-bearing, Francis went Catholic. When he started failing h•S
ex_am·i?atton
· s and was feeling
very inferior to h'1s fello""
Nigerians, he became a Jehovah's Witness. 'th
Adah now looked at the woman with the cherished baby ~•
new eyes. She never stopped talking, she never stopped Jaugh•n~t
Her laught er was as loud as that of a man. She was rough, n
as cultivated as the sleek, younger woman next to Adah. The sleek
~ne in number eleven bed, though normally a very quiet girl, took
1t upon herself to talk to Adah all the time. It must have
been very
difficult for her, because she had not had her baby yet. It was •
complicated case. She was weeks overdue, she told Adah. The sur·
geons and doctors did not know whether to operate or not. They
were all still waiting, including her husband. That husband
of
hers, tall,' handsome, well dressed and well groomed, looked like
the god Apollo . There must be something special about the man,
II2
because he came to see his wife at any ume • d · the day. The
unng Adah
nurses and doctors allowed him in. Even the surg~ n that:~ that
up, who was another handsome dark man, white , but h
type of skin colouring white peopl e usuall y have ~h~n theyw~~
stayed years and years in the sunsh ine, or that artific ial tan
white women paint on themselves, to give them a h~alth y look.
The surgeon's hair was thick black and straig ht, hts nose and
mouth heavy like those of a 'Negr o but he was Engli sh, or so
t clai~ed. ~nd he was a great m~n. A man ~ho kn~ how to
_die his knife, a man who took a partic ular intere st m all the
ptti~nts he had operated on. He kept comin g to see how Adah was
getting o .h
ti.on, wh n, nig t and day ' during the first four days after the opera -
one. en Adah was half-way betwe en this world and the next
notli~, tbis surgeon that knew how to handl e his knife well, did
shout~ ty pre~ching and sermo nising to Adah , about _why ~e
coated d:i .to hve and all that, but he kept tellin g h1~ white -
not O l 'SCtples that few patien ts had died from his knife . And
the : Ythat, the scar always healed nicely witho ut disfig uring
\then oman· Adah l'k · surgeo n and ,his · confid ence, even
1 ed thts
Adah ~n some of those nights, it seeme d to everyb ody, even to
lost, lb~self, ,that she was going to be one of the few patien ts he
lieve Withm~n s confidence never left him. So Adah starte d to be-
Not Yet htm that she was made for this world and not the next.
¾d b,.,. anyway• The dark, hands ome surgeo n won. Adah lived,
~--ame r .
~obod a ivmg specimen in that ward.
several, .Y call~d h~r by her actual name. She was saddle d with
ha"ing JUSt like titles. Some of the titles she could not help
that u~·some were not necessary, others were bestow ed on her by
'Was Catque baby she had. To the other wome n in the ward, she
the '\1/~sar; to the strings of young doctors who kept trailin g in
that e of the surgeon, she was "Cord presen tation " whate ver
med ~~nt. To the night nurses, she was the mothe r df Moha m-
tefu 1, because her baby was loud-m outhed troubl esome and
lf sed to be tamed . He would sleep all thro~g h the aftern oon
th al\ other b~ics_ were cryin~ their heads off, Bubu would slcc ·
_rough. Thetr cncs disturbed him But
night , and other bab ' never ·t P
1cs ·tn the nursery decid
· d as soon as 1 was
'Would wake, and wake in style, loud and e to sl~, then Bubu
a\l the other babies would be woken u b d~ma~dmg.
Bubu was very popula r, but at night ? ?£ course ,
Y his cries. Som the day,
' e was a terror. In the end, a
11~
 special emergenc y nurse •
ridor for h · ry a out at the end of the cor·
Bubu w 1?1a 1one, and A free to go and see him thett.
as given VIP treatment , right there in the hospital.
Othntbe fourth day, they removed the tube that had scaled Adah's
mou •
Those four days were like four centuries to her. So she
could now talk, but could not move about on the bed, and her
bade was sore. She did not mind that for was not her mouth free
at last?
'
Sh~ started pumping the sleek woman in number eleven ,ritb •
questions . HCll!l....d.id...she-come to marry a man asJ1aQdsomC 15 her
husband? What did it feel like, marrying a man who~w.as ~
old enough to be your father? How did it f~l to-1>-'.~
and respected as she was, being shower~ --~ -~W'esent,oxeS
~owers,_ funny dolls that made mad music, ~ubiuJ sorts
tied ':'•th bright, beautiful ribbons and conta•_D!n~ ~e-boJ·
of thmgs? One or two contained a funny 13?'-m t,e
All different, doing different things, How <!id~ f~~ but
treated with so much respect by the. big, masculine -Joo~in,n
r~ther mo~erly sister of !_he~r~Z. In answer, the s1~
simply smiled. She was used to being indulg~, _ 0
used She
t,einB
bJd
spolled, but she was a very simple person despite it all. vinB
been the big man's secretary. His wife had died years ago, 1~ettl,
him ~ith th_e two sons Adah had seen. Yes: A~~ had seenneeded
tall like their father but too thin for Adah s ldcjng..They read·
!0 be fed more, Adah had thought. One was in a uruvers•tr;0 aiai1
mg Law, the other was a partner in a certain firm, the ~leckth t h•d
told Adah. Marrying their father was the greatest thmg a t:1ef
ever happened to her. She was an adopted daughter, sh~ i,ut
knew who her real mother was or her father. She had tr• ~j\te,
failed, to find out whether her real parents were dead or ·cJ<lY
Her adoptive parents were good, she added quidcly, too
for Adah, who could never guess how it could be poss• h and
.t: for
somebody else to love you as if you were their very own Besdeter-
blood. They did love her, her adoptive parents, but she was Jd t,e
mined to make a happy home for herseJf, where she wou had
loved, really loved, and where she would be free to love. She
been lucky. It seemed as if her dream was coming true.
fke •
"It is not coming true; it is true. You are now aJmoSt 1
princess," Adah said, wanting to cry. . leek
Their conversati on was interrupted by the arnval of the s
114
m-star-like husband. Adah's attention was also diverted
b surgeon and his . group o f SLX • disci"P les· Adah for once,
, sur-
did n ant to see all these people. Doctor or no doctor_, t
gcon or no surgeon why could not the man test her alone, withou
• • ?
all those men with hungry eyes, like vultures, looking o~ •
They brought a 6owered screen to give her a little pnvacy. She
was sorry for this, because she liked to watch the way the sleek
woman's husband usually sat by her bedside, taking -her hand
gently, ~th of them laughing quietly, sometime s just sitting the_re,
he stroking her forehead saying nothing 1·ust sitting there, hke
love·10
rs the cheap movie' pictures Adah 'had seen at home. You
thin abo. ut th'mgs like
read · that, you saw actresses ·
and actors act.mg
tha gs like that on the screen for money. It never occurred to Adah
t such things could be real.
th!s soon as the big surgeon started to expose her to the view of
ing ~ s~cnt doctors, or surgeons, or whatever title they were go-
'Wh O called by when they qualified, Adah burst into tears.
that\ what was the matter? asked the big man. They concluded
'9/an; tas the after-baby blues. Adah would not stop. She did not
them ~t 0
P. because she might be tempted to babble the truth to
life ·h e might be tempted to tell them that for once in her whole
be 1:v~hated .be~n~ what she was. WQY- w~_j_t she __could never
toiwh ~ an md1v1dual, the way the sleek woman was being loved,
~r hat she was and not just because she could work and hand
blcss~r ~oney like a docile child? Why was it that she was not
for With a husband like that woman who had bad-to-w ait
.,,,0 r:;,enteen years for the arrival of her baby son? The whole
.,,,ith ftemed so unequal, so unfair. Some people were created
create~ . the ~ood things ready-made for them, others were just
All hke mistakes. God's mistakes.
ki
Adah could see at that moment was the sleek girl being
t:ed and love~, and the woman who had had to wait for seven-
n Y~ts walking round the ward proudly with her child. She did
~t think of what life was like for a. little girl who was aware that
s c was adopted; that the little girl might sometimes wonder
Whether her parents ever wanted her? That the little girl could
sometimes feel unwanted even by her adoptive parents. As for the
"No_rnan with the ~aby son, Adah could not imagine the aches and
pains that went with those seventeen years
She found very difficult. to control ·her tea cv
__. fit 1·
h ad stoppoeu ec mg antagonisti. c towards th b ' rs en w h en s h e
e ag surgeon and his .

six disciples. They wer ..
woman in the rou I e Waiti~g for her to stop. The Indian
Her face looke~ u[i ~ted as if she was being forced to eat shit.
she was Indian b y. e w~ted to cry with Adah. .Adah knew
her wh 't ecause her san was sweeping the ward Boor under
si i e_ coat, a~d her long black hair was done up in a long
1
ng_ e plai!, dangling behind her back like the horse's tail which
Th chiefs used to ward off fl.iesmpu
African . blic.
e surgeon made some sympathetic sounds, telling Adah not to
w~rry. They would come again to talk to her. He whispered some-
thmg. to a nurse standing by. The disciples all smiled at .Adah,
sheepish!y, the surgeon told her she was a good girl, for she was
progressmg very rapidly. They left her. None of them ~med
r~:>Und to stare at her any more. They just disappeared very quidcly,
like a gr<;>up of silent, dumb people, whose tongues had been taken
from their mouths.
The time for the visitors to rush into the wards had come. .Adah
was by the door. She could see anxious relatives clutching bunches
of flowers and gifts, waiting impatiently for the big sist~r to say
the word. These relatives were like children waving anxiously at
the mothers who, by then, had been tidied up by the bri~
Most of the mothers had combed their hair, powdered the.ir n cc·
Pi::::
They all had gay nightdresses on they looked happy and the
~t. Adah was happy for them, ~ot because she was part : that
1 p ' transparent and blue. She thought a bit about its trans-
picture, but because she was a good watcher. The only uh1 h d
was bare in the whole ward was hers. She had no /Jowers, she :rs
no cards. They had no friends, and Francis did not think 80~er
were necessary. Adah did not ask him why he did not buy bad
.flowers; mayfx: he had not noticed that the othe~ women f,:vl
.flowers. She did not blame him for this because in Lagos t
peopIe bought .flowers for new mothers She ' · t 1't ou
uJd•
would Po'°
though, so that he would learn for the ·future. Maybe he w~,
even buy her flowers for tomorrow she thought. That would
miracle though. Why was it that ~en took such a long tiine to
change, to adap_t, to reconcile themselves to new situations? She
The woman in number eight was Greek, Jarge and voluble. d •
~ad to~d .Adah that she lived in Camden Town, that, sh': ~• ut
little girl at home. The girl was the same age as .Adah s Titr. ~th
the ":oman was gorgeous. She had about ten housecoats a_ll "'~e
beautiful frills and edgings. She was a seamstress, she sa1d. S !>-
sewed for Marks and Spencer's, so she had a great many su •
standard clothes which the firm allowed her to keep. That e-ven
II6
. htdress with a satin· bow
ing, she was wearin~ a l~q ~~gher lar~e breasts. She had
in the front, tucked m mn.., ~
1 ::r
Jet her hair down and it was_ held in P ace
.th the remnant of the
sitting there, large,
satin material. She looked l~ke a blue flo b 'd ho was still out-
dccorativc, smiling and waving at her bus an , w
~de. Th 0 rses had
Adah started to worry about her nightdress. e ~ • ht-
kindly changed her into a cleaner one, but it was a hosptta1 101
dress. They were like men's shirts red-striped, with long shapebess
'
slecves_and collars. The background of the materi~l was P1 '
·n1c ut
th~stnpes stood out, just like red veins. Adah did not so much
mind wearing the shirt-like nightdress with the blood<oloured
~- npes. What she minded most was that' she was the on1Y woman
"'~ing one. AU the others had their own nightdresses. She was
going to tell Francis about it She would ask him to buy her one
;rom Marks and Spencer's. H~r special nightdress that was coming
rom Marks and Spencer's would be blue too like the Greek wo·
man· B • .
d s. ut she would tell Francis she did not want so many frills
~ . tucks. They would make her look like an over-decorated
~1strnas tree and she would not like that. All she wanted was
Plain st · h · was
soft ' raig t blue nylon or terylene, or anything, as long as it
a:ency, and decided that Francis would not like that. He would
cyCU.se her of showing off to those doctors with the curious
and cynical smiles. No she would not ask Francis to buy a
tracsnspa
so ~ent one, she would •ask him to buy a double one that had
fu.~ething like a petticoat sewn inside. Those were very beauti-
th 't because the petticoats were usually edged with lovely lace. Y cs,
no~ w~ t~e one she was going to tell Francis to buy her. She would
w: su mind if he bought only one, because in a day or two she was
she "'?uld get better ~d could sneak into the bathroom to
d h her nightdress so that 1t would be nice and clean for the next
/Y· Bu~ wouldn't Francis moan about the cost of the blue night-
htess ~1th the lacy petticoat? Wouldn"t he accuse her of envying
~ neighbours, of wanting to keep up with the Joneses next door?
""nat answer was she going to give?
She thought and thought agai~. Why, Francis ha4 never given
her a present. After all she had given liirrnhis-Mohammed .Ali of
son. ~fter all, the son..was going to carry his n.ame, not h~rs, ~e:
though she was. to carry the ~gly Caesarean scars all her life .And
what of the pam she was still going through? y cs, she d~crvcd
117

a present from Francis Sh d'd . .
money but sh . . e I not mind if he bought it with her
her sl~k nei;h~~r8~!~~ show it round the ward, and say to
ni htdr · ' • my husband bought me a double
Shg esS, _w1th a lacy petticoat, just what I was dreaming aboul"
e was gomg to do that. Well, she was learning. When in.Rome,
d 0 as Rome does Wh
Go · en m
· u• . . .
01vers1ty College Hospital m
wer SStreet, do as they do in University ColJege Hospital in
Gower trcct. Neat, that is.
The gong sounded. The visitors rushed in, laughing, clutching
more flowers, more parcels, more presents. Adah was just gettmB
ready to watch as usual, because Francis seldom came early, be-
~use of t~e ?'ildren. That was all right with her because Francis
~id not kiss m public; he could hardly ask her how she was fed-
mg, because to him Adah was always his and no illness, no god
could take Adah from him so why bother to ask how she WIS
feeling, when he was sure ~e would get better anyway? So thef
usually had nothing to talk about. Adah could only ask and WOffJ
about Titi and Vicky. Vicky's face was beginning to ~ her.
She told herself that it was a sure sign that she was getting ~ -
A fc=w days before she was not even aware she had 1iti or VO,·
Sh , · ,ns
e was_ not aware of anything, anything at a.JI. So, Fraoas
not ~mg ~ly and she was going to watch the aowd of happf
relatives spoiling their women.
A nurse rushed in after the relatives. She was coming to Adah.
with an uncertain smile on her face. It WllS a smile of e m ~
m~t. She w:a,s behaving like somebody who has been entrust'
With a nasty Job. But she had to do this job nevertheless. She ~
to Adah_, one hand holding her white cap, which Jooked as if it
was. falling off. and she was smiling this uncertain smile. She vns
talking t~ Adah, but her eyes we.re watching the visitors. · themselves that it was odd, her diving in among the sheets like
She said. her voice low and husky : "Mrs Obi, you must tell
your husband, when he comes. to bring you your nightdress be-
cause, you sec. you arc not really meant to wear the hospital govtfJ
after your baby has been bom. You only wear them in the I ~
room. But we thought that maybe you did not know."~ .smiled
again and then disappcaced.
is it that the ugliest jobs are usually given to the young? ~art::
Adah noticed that she was the youngest of all the 0111ses. WhY
their training? Couldn't the ward sister have made a better I~
telling her that she was not allowed to wear hospital dress~ an
open ward? Not to worry. it all came down to the same thing.
:118
b . · the
told to do so in
Francis must buy her a ?ightdr~~eBu:am:~~ off it. Now, it was
wav1 the young nurse did took g h"ch had to be obeyed. It
• • d t
imperative, 1t was a u Y,
an order w 1
would not be a present any more.
This left a hollow in her sore stomach. h Look al thal
She was now sure people were talking about . ~,r ~I except her
· - woman wit· h no ,.owers, no. cards' no 0 '
nzgger 11
f vu,
e the dosing time,
hi11band who 11s11all1 comes five mmutes be orh d ,1 have a
looking as if he hates it all. Look al her, 1 e oesn rison'
nightdress of her own Is she from Holloway, from a 1' d.
· • · the wari •
Only pa1ients from l"'ison wear hospital dresse~ ,n . ' ldl
Adah was sure that the granny talking and gesticulating wi Y
about her not
around the bed of her granddaughter was talki ng .
having a nightdress. She was sure the short stocky Gr~ man;~
b~ coat, sitting rather uncomfortably in the str~ght-ba .
hospital chair was talking about her. All the conversation buzzing,
buzzing around her, was about her. The buzzing went 0 ~ and on,
~d would never stop. She could even hear her name bemg men-
tioned, especially by the Greek man. She did not _want to hear
any more. She did not want to think any more. She did not want to
see any more. She closed her eyes, she dived into the sheets,
covering herself up. The world would not see her now, the wodd
Would not know whether she had a hospital dress or her own
dress. Had she not covered herself up, just like a dead
I>erson?
twlf the sleek woman, who was being talked to by _her husban_d's
0 handsome sons. had noticed that Adah was doing something
~~y, she did not think it important enough to embarrass her
V1Sttors with it. If one or two visiting relatives had thought to
that, they would have shrugged their shoulders and said to them-
selves, one never can tell with these blacks, they sometimes be-
have as if they have their minds in their arses.
Adah was grateful to them all for not asking her what she was
u_p to. She wanted some privacy. and the only one available at the
time was under the sheets.
She told Francis she was not asleep, because on arrival his first
question was about why she was lying there like that, covering her
head up. Then he smiled,.he had good news for her. Had he not
told her over and over a~n that she was a wife in a million? Was
that not why he was trying to keep her away from their prying
1.19
neighbours and friends, bcca . .
they might grow jealous) H use if they knew how helpful she
F Ad~ wondered wh~ ;ewa.s very lucky to have htt. was
. raoas look so pleased w.1 ~ news was that was m~~...
Job or Sorncthin ) hunself. Had he gfX hirmclf~
~
go and look forg~ ~,!iranos was not the type of man who.:.,
son who believed hi ess pushed to it. He was the type of per-
put anything back. Ne ~ rld owed him so much that he need mi
that crystallised cor ~ng, ~ot even an earthquake, could mange
could make Ad e m F ~as. That was the only good news that
to have her bah~ ha~py in ~er present emotional state. Coming
Wh Y ~n this hospital had opened her eyes a good deal
aJi• many English men took home their wives' nightdresses to
~ th em. She was determined to try it aJl on Francis. Shewas,,-
mg to ask h.im to buy the nightdresses, not one any more, but twO
or even three, and she was going to ask him to wash them when
tbey were soiled; after all the soiling would be due to the I~
she was going through ~ause of the son she had had for hifD.
The son that would bear his name like a banner. But first the good
news, th en the argument later. . dream~ about what you are going to be in the future and what you
"Now why don't you tell me the good news?" she.asked• sro1I·
·
mg as much as her sewn-up stomach would allow her. "TcII ine.
I am dying to hear it."
"F"ust read this, " Francis commanded. He hand ed her a Jetter
from her boss at the library where she was working. The worn~
her ~ss, God bless her, advised her to make the m:5t of her
hospital and give herself some rest. Adah was trying to rea get
s:~d
concentrate, but Francis was impatient and was urg!ng her on
to the last paragraph which he said was the most ,mpartant, 0·..
:dab
. , ·tyF~~
sk tpped most of the middle part of the letter just to satJs Fin·
and read the last part. Yes, it was good news in a way. ~~idays
chley Borough had decided to pay her a Jump sum for the would
she h3:.d not taken. Her boss remarked that she hoped Adah some
use th,s money to take a holiday after her confinement ~nd ~r that
clothes for herself. She concluded the letter by telhng h uen
the staff had collected some money and bought her a red ;C:ore
cardigan to go with the lappa with birds on it that she usua Y
to work. •JI take
"'They are very kind people in that library. I hope they 7'
1
some
me back after all this. I must go and thank them perso;~ ~el~
time " Adah remarked smiling and thinking that God a tell
her 'so much with . th,s . small fortune. so sh e could now
:120
the nurse wanted her to have,
Francis about the nightdress which bl ones and she was going
she could now afford to buy the ~ou e alk! about something
to bu)' two or three .. . but Francis was t h mg,. d back to what
he said was very important. Adah forced er mm
hc.~sayyoinug.know that course Mr lbiam said had helped him in
•••
pas.sing
•
his Cost and Works accountancy examinations· c
• "> I an now
Id
afford to pay for it. It costs less than forty pounds, and that wo;
hasten my success. I am paying for the whole course. on ::ton ay•
so that the whole lot can be sent to me as soon as possible.
What docs one say to such a man? That he is an idi?t?
That he is selfish? That he is a rogue? Or a murderer? Nothing
~dab could think of could convey her feelings adequately• She
sunp\! sighed and, instead, asked about the children, whom
Franas seemed to have forgotten to mention. She was told they
w~ we~\ and that they did not miss her much.
Don t they? Suppose I had died a f cw days ago, who would
have taken care of them? Tell me. With you still living in your
~\going to be in the New Kingdom of God. But you forget the
~drcn need you now. I don't care whether you become an
~ah or another Zik. I want a husband now and a father for
myFchild_ren now!" Adah cried.
h ranas looked about him wildly. He was sure they could not be
eatd .by the rest of the patients and their visitors, but Adah was
Si;>taking in their Ibo language and that meant gesticulating in the
athr. The gesticulations were wild like the arms of a windmill that
. ad gone mad. She kept her voice ' low, but was talking and talk-
in~.and would never stop.
t . lf you arc worried about who is going to look after the
1
ldrcn, if you had died, well, I'll tell you this. My mother
r~~ght us all up and 1 don't sec. . . ,"
. If you don' t go out of this ward, or stop talking, I shall throw
this milk jug at you. 1 hate you now, Francis, and one day I shall
leave you. I did not bring my children into the world to be brought
U{> by a woman who can' t even sign her name. A woman who used
her thumb on our marriage certificate because she could not write.
lf you really want to know, l brought my children here to save
them from the clutches of your family, and, God help me, they arc
going back as different people; never, never, arc they going to be
the type of person you a.re. My sons will learn to treat their wives as
121
 people, individuals not 1· the month had just
~y da~ghters ... God he~ke goats that ~ave been taught to talk. l Her pay f or al night dress es,
ld ff d
•~g- price for them . They
th
~1f
e, nobod y ts going to pay any blet<J.
marry ~caus e they love and respect
There was no need to rep y.
' · k h waste
sever
arrived the letter said so; they cou f ual loruxu
ry But she said noth-
·
t etr men, not becau se
becau se they are looki ng
At the ment ion of h
fo;: ~~e
me
look1~? for the highest bidder or
. . ..
if Francis did not thin t em a h

weln
t of the patie nts, got
ing. Instead, she turned her head to t : res t to sleep .
blue The shape
bored with watching, closed her eyes an ·ve
had a home she w a ome, Adah started to cry. If only she had . d d "d twas h · ·tal It was
n_o~ _died when he o~:1
not have marri ed so e~rly. If only Pa had
c1v1hsed enou gh t k · If only her_peopl e m Lagos
had been
Two days later the mght ress i arn ·

just a long cotton shirt, the type speci ally mad

h
and cut was exactly like the one Ad~ had in t e efo; :~ v~ry
.
old.
abou t
herse lf and stud t°now that a gul who decide d to live by Adah was indifferent. At least she woul d not feel gut 1ty
be-
if only H Yth or her degre e was not necessarily a prostitute, wearing the hospital's shirt any more .
was in a
forei gn · · · er . ough ts went on and on. Now here she She did not bother to show it round as sh~ had plann ed, uld
childre n .. . . co
yes ~o~nt cy, Wtth no singl e friend , excep t her cause she was not proud of it. It was not beaut iful, and she
They are only babie1, but babit1 only have one. So for the rest of her stay she learn ed anothe_r
rule.
b ecom 'e peop avele my child ren. to any
th em. Leav e this ' men and wome n. . I can switch my · /0111 · S?e should keep to herself. If she got herse lf invol ved 10
p N . u con· abou t
. erson. o, 11t1e with him a1 long a.I rt kind of gossip or conversation, she migh t be lured to talk.
vendient. No longe r. Adah dried her tears. Cryin g showed softness herself, about her childr en and about her husba nd. She did
not
an Weak ness · C rying was too late now. There was no Ma an
d o
p nd
· ° want to do that anymore. There was nothi ng to talk about .
h aj A her broth er Boy was miles away and could not be of any Soon the women in the ward starte d going home . Every
body
he J· She had to act for herse lf. She was' lookin g for a home._S~e
a never had one since Pa died years ago·' she had looked
for it 10
was anxious to be home befor e Chris
t
tmas. The
go
sleek
to
lady
anoth
was
er
the
ward ,
h ·d tmean firS to melt away unobt rusive ly. She had to
t e wron g pl ace an d amon g the wron g peopl e That di no in Engla nd
th another she told Adah. She wishe d her luck durin g her stay
h e whol e world was wron g or that she could. never start and told her it had been nice know ing her and that she
hope d
th it with. She smiled _at ted
F ome'. now at she had her babie s to share h h . a tool with Adah got better soon. Adah was so move d that she was temp
ranc1s, thank ing God .1.c 0r g1v1ng er 1m as
• • . to act iust as she would have in Niger ia. She wante d to ask the
wh · h • not harm hJ.l]l; ~top~ ed
bec~c tt was possi ble to have her childr en. She would lady for her address, but somet hing in the lady's pol_it eness
use ?e was the fathe r of her babies. But he was a dangerou ~er. l_t Was the type of politeness one usuall y a~soc1 ated with high
was could
man t~ ltve with. Like all such men, he needed victims. Adah . . ~ntell1gence. She could talk to Adah in the hospi tal ward, she
not gomg ~o be a w.illin g victim . of her life, becau se she
Joke with her, she could tell her the story
ties earth . So, Adah
She smde d again . She told him that the hospital .kauthot1 to have ~new they would never meet again, not on this
ward ,
• h
wantebd her to b uy a n1g tdress . She said she would 1I e
bl
d Just thanked her and wished her luck. She slippe d out of the
th e look on Franc is's face and her forme r outburSt ha saw her thoug ht she was
ue, ut P_adding noiselessly, so that peopl e who
JI h"m she She died a few days
sappe d all her energy. Sh e d 1d .
not have the courage to te I d simply going for a bath. But she was ~or:ie. s.
woul_d need more than one, becau se she was stiJJ losing blOO afterwards. Nobody told the few remam10g mothe rs the detail l
died. The nurse s would revea
hea~d y, she could not tell him she would like a beauti
ful and All they knew was that she had
realise d that she was dealin g not no more.
f~hio nabJe one. Adah sudde nly
th th Adah wanted to go home.
e husba nd of her dreams, but with an enemy . She had to be
wi
very carefu l, otherw ise she would get hurt She did not care any Getting ready for home was a_no~her ordea l. you dresse d your- new
but wante d o~ly to get well quickl y self and dressed your new baby 10 its brand new clothes and
more about flowers or cards, first civili an
and go bade to her childr en shaw\. Then the baby would be shown round inonhishow s
clothes, and everybody would coo and remar k
"Supp ose this mone y h~d not arrived, what would you have looked . They would also congratulate the mothe r on h.merarttnm
~e
bough t the nightd ress with? "
122
figure. These congrand f
ll a ions were not always very sincere, beause
a new mo thers went home with that frontal bulge which dis•
appears onl
th h
· th ·
. Y wa time. But on that day, the day the mothers leave
d e ospital, they would squeeze and stuff themselves into tight
r~sses or suits. One could watch these women with sympathy,
trymg to prove ~o themselves that nothing had changed, th~ they
had not lost their figures, that they were still trim and nice, Just as
tbey were before their babies were conceived· that having the
babies d~d not mean losing their youth and that: like every young
woman m the street, they could go about in ordinary clothes and
not the tent-like outfits which had been their lot over the past
months.
Adah's African costume solved the figure problem for her. Her
Ibo lap pa would stretch and stretch so that there was no need for:;
to draw her tu~my in. Her lappa would_co~er ~t al_l for h ~
had asked FranC1s to bring her the one with N1ger1an Ind~~
ence, 1 960" written all over it. She was going to show people
she ~ame from Nigeria and that Nigeria was an independ:
public. Not tha~ the other women did not know, but .Ade frctD
/:t
th~t s~e would Jake them to remember it always, that she cam
N1geCJa, and that Nigeria was independent. VidcY,
Her problem was the baby's clothes. When she had had i,,by';
the Americans had been so good to her, ordering all her wefC
clothes from Washington. The shawls and the baby's bJattkets thefJJ
all_ very soft and beautiful. But now, Adah had had to use hat
twice over. She did not mind the blankets and baby's clothes,"'oif·
she_ minded and worried about was the shawl. It had gone thtt
white. It was _never really white when it was new, but had hadrsit1B
so_rtkof ~ebau_tiful baby-soft creamy whiteness. Now after~!ines5
V JC Y wit 1t and after about a hundred washes that cr{;IW••
could not qmckly dissociate with dirt, bad washing and
· ess one.
· s~ft ness. It had now got that type of• crearnin
h ad 1ost its
~e:%t
Surely every new child deserved a new first outfit. She could sh
teH her worries to her husband because she knew the answer ~
would get. He would tell her tllat a shawl was a shawl and th•
was that. The agony Adah went through just for that a~Y
shawl ! Could she just disappear from the ward with her baby,
whilst the other mothers were sleeping, so that they would not
notice how shabbily her baby was dressed? Should she teJJ t!1e
nurse not to show her baby round because she did not Iike_h,m
being displayed like that? What was she going to do? The night-
:124
· f e even to the
dres.s episode had made her quiet, uncommumca ivAdah essed
Greek woman opposite her But the trouble was th at gul h
· dd
people knew why she had so su en1Y gone . : quiet If on y s
e that
e
could be confident enough to put on a show of mddferenc . ,
would have made life much more simple for her friends 10 th e
ward and for herself too. But this type of attitude, that of the
sophisticated poor, was to be achieved much later. On that Dec-
ember day, to twenty-year-old Adah, a new shawl w~ ~e
end of the world. Since she did not have it, she was begmnmg
to envy the sleek lady who had escaped it all by dying. If only she
had died, if only the nurses did not think her baby gorgeous, be-
?e
~use had thick curly hair, when most babies in the nursery were
;, tf ?nly they would simply let her grab him and disappear.
ricd~anas came with her lappa. Adah tied it round herself hur-
h r, but refused to go back to the ward. She stood firm in the
shospital corridor. She watched the nurse showing Bubu around,
~ was SUre the nurse was taking a long time in doing that just
all ~Use ~-ubu's shawl was old. She was sure that the women were
bitinaut tng ~t her and saying "poor nigger!" She stood there,
me,! her nails, almost eatin~ her _own flesh in her anxiety. Give
ing t~ aby back, her heart cried pamfully. But the nurse was show-
be ar em all, the women, the doctors, anybody who happened to
Who;u~d, that this was their special baby, born miraculously, for
SUfferin : mother ~ad suffered so. And was he not worth all the
listen· g and sacrifices? It was Francis who followed the nurse,
he di~n!~o all the talk. Of course he heard only the sweet words,
White t see that the baby's shawl was not new. That it was off-
In :{:d not_ soft. Men are so blind.
Wond edtaxi that was speeding her home to Vicky and Titi she
in th ere if the nurse could be really sincere? Did those w~men
t
Wh ward really admire her baby or were they just curious to see
0
rca~ly a 4:W Af~ican baby looked like? Suppose one or two were
gone r::~~ust' smcer~ly admiring her Bubu, should she not have
Sh o say a nice goodbye to them?
e started to feel guilty She h d th
the time and not those w · a ought only of herself all
friendly. What was happeon~n tw1: were doing their best to be
really happy, but she did not ~av: t e~? At ~hool, she was never
other people. She tried to find th his susp1c1ous attitude towards
~uld find was her relationship :it~nswer, but the only anchor she
c,s. She knew she was not loved her parents-in-law, and Fran-
• and was being used to give
125
Francis an edu cati h .ch th
sho uld she bl on w 1 e fam ily could not afford. Why
ame them then ? Had she loved Francis to
start with?
She ha . But the love
him later IO
d o~ly beg un to love and care for
ing to keep it alive. She
: : sho rt-li ved _because Fran cis did noth
she had begun to
she was bem g betr ayed , by the very man
pain ? She so wished she
love . Was that wh~ t love mea nt? This
cou ld tell her wor nes to som eone . She
wished Pa was alive. Pa App!Jing the Rules
no one to tell, she had to
wou ld hav e und erst ood . Sinc e ther e was
d now do what he liked,
put on a cloa k of indi ffer ence . Fran cis coul ·~t start_ed to sno w~the aire
She would only protest ore i som
~he was not going to tell him wha t to do. It was a very cold wint er that year . Bef
. Was it this betrayal b og. 0f ou
tf his beh avio ur star ted to affect her children was biting, the atmosphere grey and thic k w_it
Fran cis and his peo ple that mad e her susp
?f the icious of the women
days, you could hard ly see bey ond a few feet m J
fron ~ 0 f eil 50
th
as
in war d? It fe ~n
thick was the fog. The n the snow star ted to fall . d thic k on. e
nicely. But it w~ the gro un ,
She wish ed, now , that she had said goodbye, it would never stop. It was thic k on
1'f ·

one or two would hav
too late . Eve n if she wen t back tom orro w
gon e. She cou ld nev er get that very same
' grou p of people, JD · the
could nev_er be repett~·
sam e war d hav ing thei r babies, again. It
bye nrcely. The O Y
She had lost the opp ortu nity of saying good
would never let su~ 1
goo d thin g she had lear ned was that she
learn to thank peop e,
thin g hap pen to her in futu re. She must .Adah
even ~or thei r smiles, and kind ly nods.
of conduct h
Tiu s cons olin g conclusion this new code er
l • together w~'theotShe
earn ed from _the hosp ital and from staying for a Jong bm · .
wom en for thut een days, was to be with her
now looked forw ard to seeing her children,
whom she was ~J~~
indifferent attttud
to love and protect. To her children the
ren, and that ma e
wou ld n~e r apply. You see, they were h~r child
all the difference.
The taxi step ped in fron t of the house in Will
es Road, aod ~t
alive and we ·
y were all
scooped her babies into her arms. The
The y had not forgotten who she was.
126
ng, fall ing all tbe tim e.
roofs of houses thick in the air falli
ch ge to any
lbe ground seem' ed to have all gon' e whi te, nev er to an
other colour.
sam e roo m
was lucky. She and her fam ily coo ked in the
th Adah
served as living-room, bed room , loun ge, bath
room . The only
~
th1 . hich
·
ng they had outside this room was the lava tory plac e m w
om wen t out. The re was no
th The children seld pl_ay-roo~ as
ey could play, so the same room served them as thesmi
le, saym g,
~e!I. Titi accepted thei r baby brot her with
a shy
Bub u was_ ~ bab r.
l s a baby' that !" Ada h agreed with her that was inh entm g his
•cky looked and looked at this new bab y that of it all. He wou l~
st cot, and did
old not really kno w wha t to mak e
raili ngs and tell his
and there by the cot, peer ing betw een the .
mother that the baby "is dyin g" .
went to wor k for two weeks. Ada h felt very
gu1_lty :'-~ ut
th ~tancis knew her man oug ht to go out to wor k for thei r hvm g,
is. She doin g all the wor k.
but in her own particular family she had been
stay ing at hom e an~
It seemed to her that she was failing, by
that terri ble win ter. Fra nas
letting Francis go out and work in hom e, telli ng her how
'Would worsen the effect whe n he cam e
in Eng land duri ng
very difficult it was to work as a post man and parcels as heav y
Christmas. "Yo u are given a big bag of letters Prog ress . And , like
as the load of Christian in The Pilg rim' s, up the stairs lead ing
Christian, you are expected to _carry the load
into fiats, and.1 dow n th e st airs to those livin g in base men ts."
The load o~ h s back was heavy, the
Work was killi ng, goin g up
and down hke a mad yo-yo. The Wor k was humiliating, trea ding
127

the streets with th b
mo th e ag on your back, your nose running into your
_u , and worst of all, you were given a black band for your arm
as if you ~ad lost your mother or something. Adah would shudde;
:t this reata! and ~eeJ awfuJ, wishing she was well enough to go
~ck to her library Job to save her husband all this pain. The most
f ng~tful part of the whole business of post office jobs during
~ristmas was the English dogs. Those people, th~ English, they
did worship their dogs! Adah gave a nod. Was that not the reason
why they had a saying in their own language that you should Jove
them and lo~e their dogs? They love dogs, theJfogljsh do,_Y~
they love their dogs, Francis continued, so much so th_aJ.,.thg V:~e
rather the dogs butcher a black man, than Jet the black man ~Jl
dog. Adah considered this and decided that it was not faJC ~
people should let their do~s butcher a black man. After all, :
black man was only a postman delivering Christmas cards an
. ever actually happened,
, !own
Ad wondered' or ked w.s
parceIs. H a d Jt ah
Francis thinking it could happen and happen to him? She asthat
~im this. ~rands was sure not only that it could happen,Ju~eard
1t was gomg to happen to him. .And he was sure he h .Adah
s~mewhere that it had happened to a man he used to kno:• the
d1d not want to ask where he heard it and what the nasn 01 too
man was, b ecause Francis might accuse her of wanting · toknow
much. J'k a
But the picture Francis conjured up in her min? ~Jungdr~ed
leech. She had seen the picture of the man Chr•s~an, wf in
shabbily like Robinson Crusoe climbing a steep hill wi th a~ Jook,
his h~d, puffing and puffing. So that was how Fraod~ ~ould thetJ,
the big load on his back, puffing up and down the stair~, ai:,arfcing
a_ll of a sudden, the mad English dogs would chase him? owners
ltke mad, hungry to butcher him, to eat him up, and _their.. 1 This
would be standing there laughing and saying "poor ni~er ·d she
thought would send a chilJing feeJing through her ~eins an ·og
would_ sh~dder at it. The thought of Fr~ncis runn!ng, ru:~Jd
for h1s life and the dogs in hot pursuit. The picture F ds
not go away. It stayed there with her, so much so that when ranlf
left for the post office in the mornings she would say t'? herseby
"I may never see him again. The dogs may have eaten hi~ up re
the evening." But Francis usually turned up, ready to recite
horrid experiences. It was brutal of Shakespeare to say the
m;at
"Cowards die many times before their deaths", because that
cowards really suffer. What they imagine is so real to them
128
\
\ d. d before and she had not
they actually suffer. Adah had never~ who h~d died and then
been fortunate enough to see some Y h had suffered the
come back to tell her what 1t w~
· rke
1
'
but s e
th fear of being eaten
fear of death, and had seen Francis suffer e th. fear could be
up by the angry English dogs, so she knew that ts
real. Really painfulfear. . · st round
She took Titi to a play-group at L1ndhurst Ha11' JU L .b
the corner from Willes Road, next to the Athlone Street . 1 r~ryri:
Normally it took her only five minutes or so to cover th is s O d
?istance, but it was winter and there was snow on the groun~ an
•t was her first day of using her feet after the cutting-up in the
hos_pital. Her feet were reluctant to obey her. It seeme~ 0 her !
as if she had to learn to walk all over again. She held Titi, n~w
three, tightly, but Titi was so happy at the thought of escaping
from their on~room mansion that she skipped up and down,
and up, on the dangerous snow. Adah let her go, her feet
t~~bling, her head light, and her vision blurred. It seemed to h~r
bl she was seeing lots and lots of colourful balloons in the air,
co~e, red, and yellow, but there was more blue than the . other
"·hoUrs. So she walked with caution taking her time. So this was
..w at the sister
· '
of the ward was talking about when she said · sh e
ch~dsure
1
Adah was not well enough to look after three young
A ten. Yes, the sister was right. She was not well enough.
and ~ger ~elled up inside her. Was she so ill without knowing it,
up rancis telling her the story of the dogs that would eat him
mi' a~d s~e blaming herself for letting her husband work? Anger
cn:e with her fear. Suppose it was going to be like this till the
Withof her days? Suppose she was going to remain a weakling,
We Wobbly feet, and eyes that would not focus, and a brain that
d nt round and round like the ripples in a pool. What would she
0
• then? How would she study to be a librarian and then a
'Writer, wh"ch
1 sh e was sure sh e was gomg · ·
to be by the tune she
;~ forty? Let the dogs cat Francis up, she could not care less.
e started to blame herself for worrying about it in the first place
All men do wor~, why shou_ld he want to be different? Had Adah
not learned that m the hospital? I-lad she forgotten her r 1 t .
the one she made then, that she was . . _eso u ton,
Francis's worries? Here she w fi gomg to be indifferent to
hospital, worrying about it all a~ ve .days after leaving the
lea.med. ' orgetting everything she had
When she got to the play-grou th
P, e woman who was ru nnmg .
1.29
;t c~ngr~tulat ed her on the birth of her baby but remarked that she
hoo ed tired. She should not have come. She would return Titi to
. er, at noon_, when the play-group dosed. She would collect Titi
10
the mornings on her way in until Adah was really strong. Did
she not r~alise that she had lost a lot of weight. She was surprised
the hospital had discharged her so soon, she should have stayed
longer, the kind woman observed as she made Adah a nice bot
mug of tea.
On her way home Adah saw another student carrying a big bag.
' walking very,
but she seemed to be very briskly, almost as 1'f she
was happy working for Christmas. She was a woman. And she "as
black. 'd
Adah leaned against the dirty supports of the o~erhead_br1
off Carltoun Street, watching this young woman chp-cl:Pt: her
le
letter-boxes as she went along. Adah thought she coul b the
· · · ht of the ag,
smgmg. Wasn't she aware of the dogs, the we•g Id pidc·
black band and all that? Adah shrugged her tired shou ers,to the
. h er
mg way back to Willes Road with care. When she came baldy bus·
front of the cafe run by the Greek woman a nd he~ chips corn·
~and, she rested again, savouring the smelJ of bacon a; most of the
mg from the cafe. At last she got home, and slep
day. h covered
Francis came back in the evening, telling her tba~ :e houses
the worst houses ever built in England. He was sure ~ ow that
were specially built to torment him. Did !1dah n~t A;ah said,
those houses had their letter-boxes on their roofs· f speech·
"Huh!" and Francis said that "roof" was just a figure O he bad
But that the letter-boxes were almost on the roofs, t,ecause
to stretch and stretch to reach them. d dJ'd not
Adah listened, and yawned on purpose. Francis · ·s wor s out of
cling this time. They went in through one ear, a nd camedid not
the other, without leaving a single scratch on he!· That
stop Francis, for he loved the sound of his own voice. hapPY
Christmas came and that particular Christmas, Adah wasb..,...use
to tell people that her husband was a Jehovah's W J·tn ess' """'"
there was no money for any celebration. "Y: ,neaD,
Mrs Noble gaped at this piece of news and asked, 0
~ single
you· re not buying any presents for your children, not even
toy?" Jehovah's
Adah said, no, they were not buying because you see,d that the
Witnesses believed that Jesus was born in October an
130
. the devil. The devil had
Christmas celebrations were the work of b t d for the devil at
turned people away from God, and people ce1e ra e bl • hed try·
Christmas instead of for Jesus in October. Mrs No e sig . ' .
ing to follow Adah's reasoning and came up with another piercing
question. She was an inquisitive woman, that Mrs Noble.
She asked, "I did not see you celebrate anything here last October
or did you?"
.
"No, we did not," Adah replied and wondered why ~e Wit-
nesses don't celebrate in October· maybe because they think the
~~1
of ~rist was not important 'enough to bother with. .
~dah dtd not really care. She believed that there was a man up-
staits who cared for what happened to everybody, including her-
self and her children. She knew there was a man called Jesus. But
tbc part of Christianity that still confused her was why this great
man should be called the son of God. Adah did not want to ask
~ybody about this, because they might think her stupid, not know-
~~~W~Jesus was the son of God, so she started celebrating H_is
th ch ause she was born into it. Her Pa had liked to preach m
·co:\d ~rch on Sundays and she had been a choir girl ever since she
at All t?en;iber. Then she had taught children at Sunday school
a -..· atnts Church in Y aba, in Lagos. How, then, could she go to
Youica\ and say, please, Mr Vicar, I still don't understand why
Orth: 1 Jesus the son of
God because His birth was so un-
"-'hat ttx? ~dah did not mind celebrating His birth because, from
&teat e ~~~ and did, He was a great poet, a great philosopher, a
ce\ b polttic1an and a great psychologist, all in one. The world
u/ rated the births of lesser men, why then should she grudge
"'~ great ~an the celebration of His birth? And what did it matter
h ether tt was celebrated in October or in December? If we
~rnans could rationalise about dates and all that, she believed that
od, who made the humans who could rationalise and come to
tr~s with things, would be able to rationalise still more. So
av1ng equipped herself with this idea, she did not share Mr;
Noble's distress. The long and short of it was that she had n
money for Christmas; God would understand. 0
God did understand and comforted her a little. Because all f
sudden, a big parcel arrived as if it were from Sant Cl ' I O a
from the kind woman who was her boss at th ~ aus._ t Was
Library. Ther~ was a doll with eyes that blinkede d orth ~inchl~
\ace with white shoes and socks to match f • . ~essed 1n white
little guitar for Vicky and a hoppin ' or ! 1t1. There was a
g, squeaking hedgehog for
131
 .stmas on television and
.sh adver tising for Qin l holiday. So he w~
!:~ ~y %w;~~
g.
s: lovely that A~ah could hardly wait for Oirist-
em to her chddr en. That was the only thin As SOOII as th'ri!~ext big thing is the ann ~ed saving for
thet~
th t h d worri ed her h ch.Id 8 shou ld get so~
a a h ·
no toys, when every Ill the papers, d 6.nish payin g bef~re they Adah
child had 00 . , er i ren avmg
sure they woul estin g that • w·tn ess like
Th :at Chns tmas. The Nobl es made the situation worse. holidays He ended up ·bycesugg not a Jeho vah s 1
she was
ere ~as this man who was a salesm an, selling from door to door. · ·d
toys for her chtl ren sm d or
of two, a
!fom him, ~e Nobl es boug ht a big doll as big as a child her husband. two smal l toys for a poun the
g pr~ , big e~ou gh to take a real baby, and all sorts of things buy one or ebody had given them to d
She was tempted to
that
for their five child ren. The cost of it all was so outrageous two and to lie to Francis tha~ som 1
From the two poun 5 a
Adah_ called upon Jesus to have mercy on them all. Theo Mrs children, but how was she gomg ~o ~~~~ed her? No, she
Noble woul d
"never -never ". .th the prese nts sent by
expla m~d to her that they were buyin g them on the week housekeeping mone y Franc is
so
Adah did not know what the "neve r-nev er" was and she looked rather spend more on food and make ~o : n do"; the prese
nts
red hair betwee o and they
blank that Mrs Nobl e laugh ed, twisti ng her long Mrs Konrad. In fact she was not thm ge beau tiful
her finge rs.
would do all right. They were new, er ~:r knew why, thoug h :
Mr Nobl e then told her that here in Engla nd it was possible to were appropriate. Why worry for more · S t from the neve
r-nev er
to agree
b~y many thing s witho ut havin g a penny . You simply had because she wanted to buy them herse lf, n~ t shop s brow se,
with the seller that you woul d pay evecy week, or every month
a paper or two, to say that
15
man, but to go to W oolwo rth'_s or the
O •er;Jr
g th
the p;ice s, and
bustl ing and
the case may be, and then you signe d around touching this and touch ing that, askin
you were sane and of sound mind and that you knew what you
were liked
tn~ng her own selections, just like other -:;~ ers, Id have
the w~u Chris tmas is
doing when you prom ised to pay and aU that; you then took rushing about in their Chris tmas busy n~. A
chu; fr:~
goods , just like that. that, especially when she realis ed that, in Eng l: • As for her
"Just like that? " Adah said unbel ieving . ccl~rated more in the shops than in ~e other chil-
"Yes, just like that," Pa Nobl e agreed.
be miss-
rth cbtldren, were they not too small , too isolat e h t they were
Adah 's mind sped back to Lagos. If a salesman could ~rcn to be able to comp are notes and find out w a
stupi d enoug h to aJlow peopl e to buy on their doorsteps goods
almos t a hund red pound s, just like that, the salesm an
?ave to dose up his business. In Lagos, peopl e would not pay, ,_us
would
wo
s::
. t
1ng)

5
·
ihe 24th was cold. For the firS
.
t ume I•n Adah
d dam
's life she had to
and there was
orks,
peopl e would £>Cnd Christmas Eve indoo rs. It w~ col~ n eraci~. no firew
if the salesm an's dema nds became too irritat ing, not like
taking the white snow. There was n~t a _singlase 1. f ~ s had died '
disap pear. Then she asked Pa Nobl e: "Supp ose I run away, no bell-ringing; it was all qutet , Just
all his goods with me. What wiU he do then? " bc-
the celeb_ration of His birth. Noble s to watch their televi sion, the
"Ah," Pa Nobl e laugh ed, "you' re think ing of home. Where Frana s went down tototbebe some s
pccial Chris tmas films on
wiJJ you run to here with all your childr en? It is not all that
easy caus th ·
going •th her babie s ' puttin g them to
c ere were dah
live, and peopl e here usuall y leave ~ for- BBc ch had to stay Wl
to find a new place to
you 11 be ~nnel. A be ood and go straig ht to sleep , becau se there
wardi ng address. It is not easy to cheat here, becau se them to . g • for them the follow ing day. She
bed,
w tclhng
. be a btg surpn se
caugh t in the end."
f ~ 50
es,
gou~g to rted that she sang to her child ren Ades te Fide/ e,
Adah did not need Pa Nobl e to teJJ her how difficult it was
to heard the tune some where befor
e t • ~tght caseeme d to have
find a house to live in, because she had exper ienced it. So. the
i ~n~ T,~, wV~ y looke d at his moth er and sister, his little Franc is
Noble s were going to pay every penny for what they were buying IOmed m . .: g ' his sleepy eyes wand ering from · the one to the
11 abo Ad notice d that one of
''But it will take a Jong time before you nnish payin g for aJ mouth pouun ·
1t was a ut. ah . h .
h dering what "th th
this." ot er, won d to move w, e song, or was tt er imagination">
h" seeme
Pa Nobl e agreed again, but told Adah that in Engla~d you_ wor·
ys. s:/::ichcd the car, but the child did not make any sound . Ye~,
ship two goddesses; one is Christmas, the other one JS holida 1 33
132
there was something funny with that ear, it was definitely bigger ~dab could do and then hope for the best. It puzzled her, though.
than the other one, hanging down like an elephant's w. ~~ tb~people .sho~ld be forced to eat everything that w~ set before
stopped singing. Funny, she had never noticed that one of V~
food. I~ Nigeria the situation seldom arose. You fimshed all the
ears w~ bigger than the other one. It must have been naed it.
otherwise he would have winced with pain when she touch <lis·
t
child 1ckly and wanted some more, especially when you were a
L. • ut here you had so much to start with that food became a
She ought to do something about it though, now that ~e h~~,nis· uore. She k th
for other ~ew at though she might never have enoug money
h
covered the difference It was shame for God to make a simp e ""--..
take l •.ke that, allowing
. . th the other on . Ln,.re-wastlungs, she would never allow her children to go hungry.
one ear to be b•gg~r an ed So she Sh no room for that.
S~c could not correct it now; it was too late, it was too fucth · baby's tihichc cleaned
A T"1ti· and put on her red dress with
· spotty pockets,
picked up a jar of Vaseline, which she ~ught f~~er t}iit Road. ~ah had bought from one of the shops along Finchley
botto~. and rubbed it liberally in Vicky'! big ear. rrcd the de- up to . e dress had been too big for Titi. but Adah hemmed it
was intended to ease the non-existing pain, or to co B t she fdt dress t~2.e because she did not know if she could afford another
feet, or to case her own mind, Adah did not know. : went to the ~ e that for a long time. She sat Titi down in the middle of
better, having done something about the ear. Then 5 e her n~ :;1~ tol~ her to stay quiet and still so as not to mess up
sleep. t th•t the ea ~•te tights. She then proceeded to Vicky. Then she saw
Christmas morning was like any other morning, ~ : night biol),. r again. It was hanging down more than ever, it was getting
01:,'-t and b · · To_ cap it
· a11. V 1"cky
there was so much silence in the street. Snow had fallen ID f white, lias sitti igger, th~re was no doubt about i~.
O
and there were no footmarks at all to smear the carpet whY the hold of ng down ~•etly, too quiet for Adah s V~~- _Pante took
It was ~ silent, so peaceful, that Adah understood no; Jand it CVer th h_er. Was Vicky sick again? Was the merung1hs, or what-
carol Silent Night belongs to that time of the year.. In .
0
ft,holf
was silent night, holy night. In Nigeria it was ~~ 1 ~Y n•~e night
type e •llncss was called, coming back again? Was this ano~cr
mas ~ the same illness back to visit them again, and on Chrast-
maybe, but fireworks night, the night of loud re1o1c•~g,. ging, In Yelled ay? She did the only thing that came into h~r head. ~he
of palm-~ine drinking in the streets, the night of be -n~ot JyinB ~'- for F rands who as usual was downsta.u:s watching
~Ob . ' • '
England 1t was a hush hush morning for was Jesus
'4te
Fr !cs
television. .
asleep in the manger? ' • had J1'1adt Ad anos came up almost immediately because, unlike Mrs Noble,
Mrs Noble had invited the children down for _tea: Shif ditfeient sh ah seldom called her husband for anything. In fact, sometimes
~ '1Vas grateful to the Nobles for accommodating him for so long,
all sorts of elaborate preparations. There were 1elhes plates
. . . and paper a\lse otherwise it would have meant his staying in the same
colours m a not of Ah-Baba-shaped paper cups . Christn>.S ~rn, getting in Adah"s way, telling her she ought to have done
and paper napkins. She had her room decorated in tch thC lh,s instead of that.
paper, all shining and bright. She bought paper hats to r:urs and lie came to ask her what it was ~at made her_ call him like that
colours of the jellies she had made. Adah saw all the ' 0 were tht ~hen she knew that he was watching a pantomime on television.
thought it was a shame they had to be eaten. What ·t J1'10rt She then told him that Vicky's r!ght ear ';'as getting as big as that
I
colourings for? To make food more appetising? To make Id en· of an elephant. Adah ~as sure it w~ going to be bigger than an
beautiful? For it was beautiful. She hoped her children -wou pot e\ephant"s before moman_g, because at had grown bigger since th
• . She wa5 day be£ re Francis cxanuned the car and decided they h d e
Joy 1t. As fo~ her, the whole affair was too suga~- u h J1'1edi· o . a to call a
brought up with that taste; anything sugary tasted Jike co 8 doctor. . t D ? H .
"A doctor on Chns mas ay e wall not com .
~~~ ~~ di Trust this chil~ to be ill on a day whe the an~ Vicky will
Adah got the children ready for Mrs Noble's tea party. Id t,e a.v~\ab\ct '" Adahcncd. n ere is no doctor
Titi to eat everything on her plate, because ~~ Noble -wousoJ1'1e "Look, doctors arc supposed to call
very angry if she made a mess of her food. Tiu unders«>od ._ii on you at any time y .
.
o f t h e reasoning .
Adah was trying .
to pump into her· That was x3 5 ou re

I ~4
 ill. It is the law," Francis explained as he struggl~ into~:
on his way to the telephone kiosk. "I must ca~ bun out.
mas or no Christmas, Vicky is ill and that's that. . . eriayc,,J
"But it is Christmas," Adah persisted. "At home m Nig,nillion·
c.an•t get a doctor out on Christmas Day, unless you are
aire or something."
1
CbristinJS Da('
''Well, it is different here. You ~ get one ~n. ingling the coinS
With that announcement, Franas walked o_u l hand.
he was going to drop into the telephone slot JJl is d 00 this day,
. • th· weather an .... .
Fancy getting somebody out 10 ts. as their right, t,ut .....1
just because a child was ill. She guesse~ Jt w . cd away, ~
be this was a right that could ~e easily exf1ainbaby and t,eouSC
they were blacks and because Vicky was on Y a to Vicky ~
it was Christmas Day. If anything should happenblack child'°
Society would forgive the doctor, because he;as :bould ,Adah:;
had been taken ill on Christmas Day. ~hy he ~d not know.-dl.
pect a doctor to call? She started to pan~c. S Had not ~ tfie
she was doing any more. Vicky was dyin~ nf:·his f,est SUJ_t. 9/'5
larged ear not proved it? She dresse~ him artY· E"Ven ff_1t Jj/e,
one she had kept for Mrs Noble's ChristlD~ Pt wear io bis .
going to be the last suit Vicky was ever ~~e :ar; it w~ ~~8
it was going to be a good one. She touchc . and 011 Ch~
hot as well. Adah knew it, death was commg, ~-
Day. hts by a 1oud
She was woken up from her terrible tboug th gh tbei! h t
t~
. . Sh pcd rou . VI •
ment gomg on in the street below• . e pee God ha\'C rnetcY• h•d
window and saw Francis and two policemen._ ·.. ;J ,nd he _.,..
aJci him to , .. • t.,...
had Francis done now? They are t ng . . d she had to feet
come to say goodbye to them. Vicky was dymg ~; her wobbly J e
care of the remaining children all by herself,;/ t kept ~og b_ 11
that had refused to get strong and her eyes d a t go do..,nstsJ~
and yeJlow balloons all mixed up. She coul noeck a11d thetl th
because she knew she wouJd fall and break her Wstay put. t·
remaining children would have no ~ne. She ~o:as taJking, shOUw
The noise was coming up the sta1rs. Francis _poJiccmetl sac'1
fog, explaining, talking and talkir~g. Th~ t;:
growing rnu
Vicky's ear, and agreed with Fran_os that ';.,es he had to ¢
more rapidly than the rest of his body. • superior airs. This did not help Adah corr:t to ~ow them any
d
a octor. . round and round,
.Adah couJd not talk. Her eyes were gom~ t her what it W.S
and would not focus. Would somebody explam 0
136
~ was c_ausing all this hullabaloo? It could not have been ju5t
use Vicky was ill. Had Francis in his present mood murdered
thCdoctor?
lik~en one of the policemen spoke in a cool voice. He sounded
usin:::~y wi~h lots and lots of reasoning who was capable
'fhe pol" easontng when everybody around him was going mad.
of
ing th~~an was tall and had a moustache and he was now tell-
cau.., 1·t t at a doctor would come· not their Indian doctor, be-
"" uwas Ch nstmas
· '
IOQun. Qe w ld Day, but another one, the Indian one's
th,matterw·;u. come and tell them what it was that was
But Wh ~ Vu:kfsear.
ask any~ e ~ohce? Adah wondered furiously. She could not
started_ sw Y ~ntil the two police officers had gone. Then Francis
man a has;a~ng and _sending a man to his maker and calling the
annoyed h_ar · Adah intervened and asked him who it was that had
'inc im so much.
h' is· Whit
bleeding
) I. n d.tan man. Do you know the stupid
· man th"nlcs
1
again, Wa~· lie 1s as black as the devil!" Then Francis thought
he is as ugl ing up and down their one room. "Do you know that
'Wctl Yas hell?"
as the d•~~~1
~hat seemed logical to Adah . If the man was as black
Francis • it followed that he would be as ugly as hell. What did
hell? 1n::nt? To put a man as handsome as Apollo in an ugly
4'dah Wa. would not make sense. But what had the doctor done?
not bee nted to ask if only she was given the chance, but she 'W'as
Adah a.Use Francis was holding forth about the ethics of Medicine.
ma.de ca.me to the conclusion that that husband of hers would have
1'h a &ood doctor, knowing all the nilcs.
Ve en a black car pulled up in front of their house. A man. a
ca( ~hort man, young, not Indian but Chinese, came out. He was
V·1tyin~ a. black bag. He must be the doctor. Adah rushed
th cky into their only bed, shoes, suit and all and asked him to stay
ere. She removed the rice she was boiling from the stove and
Would have poured it into the bin, if it had not been for F •
Who asked her whether she was going crazy. The man com. ranas,
Chinaman. Did she not sec his eyes and the shape f ~~g was a
head like that of a calabash they used at h
,,,,
why then should sh e panic.
~ 1S round
• 1 The man doct ome 1n N 1geria.
" . ;;i
a second-class citizen too and could n~t or or no doctor, was
hear it. rnuc , but it was nice to
1 37
 The man came in and ..... d given them a p
rescrip-
· • .,, as sorry f .6d doctor bad come, an
tng such a terrible t· . or~ ah and Fr,:,....:_£ L
• •me on Chnstmas D ...."U5 ,or un--
tnstruments and started t . . ay. He llnpacked his
time. Vicky, followed h . o examine Vicky, pressing the ear all the
~f~~gft~t:~
bOO. IIJ\N
:ery uno~odonsox~f the Welfare Stat_e wn:~P~!~
f the prov1s1 . H d F ranas
. . is movements fascinated Th boy At lcist some o -cl citizens alike. a . doctor would not
in pain. His temperature was normai Th . c •as oot
~ ~ to the police station w ~ uld have done if it a
d- and first ass h the Indian . h d all
and warm, but that was all . e ear was now very big
,t by going d ed what Franas wo
chair Adah gave him. His sha . ~n!octo~ sat down on the crme? .Adah won er . as They
room . He seemed to be saatc:!:ng his ~ m r::~as~ ~ tiappcocd in Lagos. ch left of the ChnStrn · . li
gently. He was a Chinese but one of those r~=- h g After all that, there was not mu b ht the left-over Jd cs
.th bo · ' , ..umamen W O weic . d M Noble roug
e1 er rn in . EngJ~d or who had come here as children. He ate their boiled nee, an rs . h had never. seen f ood look so
to Vicky. Vicky refused to eat them, c
gfuot up fron:1 his chau, scratching aJJ the time, and then aslccd a
nny question. rolourful.
"Have you any bugs here? You know, bed-bugs?"
Adah prayed for the ground to swallow her up.
The doctor wrote a letter which she and Francis were to take to
their doctor. The doctor, the Chinese one, noticed their disc:Dm-
1iture, and said, "My grandmother in China used to kill bugs this
~ay::. The doctor spread his weJJ-kcpt hands wide in gcsticula-
~•on. She used to get cigarette tins, and put aJ1 the feet of the~
in them, so that the bugs would fall into the tins, which
had alceady been half fiUed with water." He took his leave, and
the two stupid-looking parents told him how sorry they were, get-
ting him out from his Christmas turkey. .And the Chinaman told
them not to worry, because children had a way of scaring P ~
so. How were they supposed to know that Vicky was not dymg,
but only bitten by a bed-bug? . .
It was nice of him to say so, but he went leaving a nasty pit_ JD
their stomachs. In desperation, Francis tore up the Jetter which
they were supposed to give their Indian doctor down the ~dcy-
cent. The doctor had written exactly what be thought, that Vi
had been bitten by a bug. ·t
"If only you did not have to add so much drama toth1
all. . Why
;)" in the name of aU the saints did you have to go to e
poIICC. • d
"The Indian doctor would not come. He said it was his rest ~y
and I know that doctors are supposed to attend their patJcn . ts lO
an emergency. Why should he refuse to attend to Vicky? .And h~w
was I supposed to know that he was not seriously ill, and that e
was only bitten by the bugs in Pa Noble's house?" . h cd
There was nothing .Adah could say. She herself was fog ten •
too, but she had known their own doctor would not come.
:r:38 1~9
 . hich robbed him of
because of his over-abundant environment w d d to cheer
the ability to think for himself? Well, Adah cone1u e ' a
herself up, that may be so, but that happened years and years g 0 '
II before the birth of her Pa.
She was different. Her children were going to b~ diffe~ent. ThC:1-.
wcre_all going to be black, they were going to enJOY bein~ bla<:1',
Population Control be proud of being black, a black of a different breed. That 5 what
!hey were going to be. Had she not now learned to listen to the
~n~ of birds? Was that not one of the natural happenings that
The snow melted from the pavements, from . the gardens and
rything ~ired her favourite poet, Wordsworth? She might never be a
from the roofs of houses. Spring was in the au and ~e dark w OUs_poct like Wordsworth, because he was too great, but Adah
sprung up as if injected with new life by the gods. Even 10 ; beat ti~•~g to trai~ herself to admire the songs of birds however
street, as dark as Willes Road in Kentish Town, one cou1 thcir ' 0 appreciate the beauty of flowers however extravagant
the birds sing. . l .Adah the rnsc;t. She jolted herself to, reminding herself that she was
One Monday morning when her family were st•ll as eep, bath· ing fo~ her l,.~f three babies, and that she was supposed to be rush-
' to have h er ba th · There
got together her wash things .d was
• itsnoto the lb er .1.YLonday morning bath.
room in the house in which they lived so she _pa.1 _v,sthe week· friendc women
Th h l
w o c eaned the baths greeted her like an old
public baths in Prince of Wales Road several tunes IO this bird; tnorni~gs ~ knew she was always the first customer on Monday
It was on one of these visits, on a Monday, _that sheJ::stood still too crowd dec:use Saturdays were usually too busy, and the baths
grey, small, solitary but contented in its soli~de. A bird, singing,
on the other side of the road watching this grey thee bapPY
to "1ork:nd
to hurry h
he pref~rred Mondays, when most people had gone
th e ladies working at the baths would not have
singing, hopping from one window ledge to ano tur;. f a.OC)' seldom g ~r up. The only snag was that on Monday mornings she
in its lonely freedom. Adah was intrigued by the crea JI thing ,s the "1atero hv~ry hot water, because the boiler, or whatever heated
being moved this early in the morning by such a s;:een wilder long tirn~ ta hto be turned off over the weekend. It usually took a
this grey bird, when less than a year before s~e ha She 0 eYer of the Wat
O
eat up, but Adah did not mind the lukewarmness
birds, all gaudy in their colours, all wild in their sonf"uses. 'J'befl <iuietbath~r, because that was the price she was paying for a long,
took notice of birds then, in the back yards of Lagos ~ tee whefl
sh e though t to herself : suppose there was never any win lier bath th M . ·
f the' earu••
~"' cause sh at onday mornmg was particularly important be-
O was gaing t O the F amily
every living thing seems to disappear from the face an eYery· tended th e · Plannmg · Oinic. She had' at-
the birds would always be around, they would becorn_e ed it and
day thing, and she wouldn't have noticed and admirin ,Africa.
;~eek
literatur before and had been loaded with masses of
many 0 ;et ~i;ad read about th~ jelly, the Pill, the cap and so
listened to its watery song. Was that not what we need shine, no her not to gs. She told Francis she was going, but Francis told
to have a long, long winter, when there would be n~;u;ake us • the Wa it go becaus~ men knew how to control themselves better
birds, no wild flowers and no warmth? That wo~ came, thefl ;a;
give / to done in the Bible. You hold the child and you don•;
'Was not '--- womashn, yhou pour it away. Adah considered this It
nation of introverts, maybe, and when eventually sp~ngW}Jat doef h uccause e ad stopped tru · h ·
we would be able to appreciate the songs of birb~: us of the er husband could hurt her with sti~g er husband, but
that mean? Has Nature been too merciful to_us, ro ~ to knoW the way he had been brou ht ~ut mcacung to, for wasn't that
ability to wake ourselves up from our trop1~al slum ~ Mond•Y to forgive her for makin~ ~ She knelt and prayed to God
that a simple thing like the song of a grey bird on
morning in spring can be inspiring? Was that w Y was JazY
a; the earJY
hack.
When .it was time to take Bubu
er plans behind her husband"
s
to the clinic to be weighed,
Europeans who came to Africa thought the black ma0 x4x
140
she saw a motherly-l ook.in
P p·u that was 1ess co mplicate d.
have the Pill? you see I g nurse and told her, "Please, could I insides. No, she would go for th~ 1 'd ask uestions.

study and bring up the

help me? I need the Pill."
:r
other child it would ~ ~ not twenty-one yet and if I had an•
b~~f!\ : d I originally came here to
rought from home. Can you
The jelly? No, Francis would notic~ a~ n theqform ? The thought
came to her that she could sign
forgery. She imagined herself at a cour~ anh husband' s sig-
T~le wPolma~
F ami y ann smiled er ·and tickled Bubu on the cheek ThPV had a
· sending her to jail for seven years for for~mg e~
. mg 101c 1n the evenings on Mondays.. She -, would
f et ~he hter~ture for Adah to read and she could decide with her
nature. But at the end of it she would b~ ahve, an ?n~~e did not
might be allowed to look after her children. But if
us and which would suit them best. Well, how was Adah to tell
~e woman that F ~ancis said that the best way to control the popula·
tion was to pour 1t on the floor? Adah could not bring herself to
tell the nurse that. The last nail in the coffin was when the woman
brought a form which Adah's husband was supposed to sign to t~ll
~em that he was all for it, that he wanted his wife equipped with
btrth-~ont rol gear. There was going to be trouble over ~at, for
~ranc1s w?uld never sign a thing like that, and he would rai~e ?ell
if he realised that Adah got the literature without his penrusst00·
What was Adah going to do? Why was it ~CE_~sary to have 1
husband brought into an issue like that? Could not the woman~
given the ..opportuni ty of exercising her own will? What~~~
happened, she was not going to have any more children. She_ 1 _
not care which way she achieved this but she was having n? mo~-
ch1·Id ren. T wo boys and '
a girl were enough for any mother-m~taw.
If her mother-in- law wanted another one she coul~ g~J!_er sootn
.
another wife. Adah was not going to have '
any more. It was hn d
. b .
gomg to e easy for her to forget the experience she hadbe a
recently having Bubu. That was a warning. She might not 50
lucky ne~t time. . eduled
Francis announced that he had read his two chapters sch ·ng
for the day and that he was tired of reading and 'that he was got ea
d?wn to the Nobles to watch their television. ~dab· en~~u;!aiL
him to go. She wanted to read the birth-control liierature bu's cot
Adah fished the now rumpled leaflets out from under B~ 'fhrCC
where she had hidden them. She read them again and agat~~t Jike
facts stuck. One was that the Pill is the one you swallow 1 • side,
aspirin. Secondly, the jelly is the one you allow to ,nel_t •~ds.h
The cap, which was the third thing was the one you fitted ' 0 : I cap
chuckled an d was amused at it all., aki spec•a
Fancy m ng a hese Euro-
for your other end instead of for your head. Well, t the cap
peans would stop at nothing. She was not going to cho<>S~th one's
though, as it would be too messy, messing around w•
But how was she to make Francis s1g h'
· it for im. u
B t that would be
d the magistrat
.
e
alive she
t'
forge the signature it might mean anoth er ch 'Jld , another trauma
. 1c
birth, another mouth to feed; and she was still not getting a?y-
where with her studies The price she would have to pay for bemg
· and loyal· wife would be too much.
an obedient She f orged the
·
signature. She saved and scraped from the housekee ping · money to
P~Y for the first lot of pills. The money had been saved,_the fo_rm
sig?~d, and, to add to her joy, she now had another _library Job
;~tt_ng for her at the Chalk Farm Library. She was gomg to keep
15
Job, no matter what. She was not going to allow herself to get
prinant again. Never.
. ut first she had to have this Monday bath in case she had to
stnp
th
h • ·
erself to be examined or something . She had told Francis
at Bubu was such a big baby, gaining weight every day, that the
l>Cop~e at the clinic would like his photograp h taken that Monday
:cning. It pained her, having to resort to the very method she h~d
th:is used when she was little. That horrible tendency to tw1st
. acts. But what else was there for her to do? She prayed to God
again and again to forgive her.
She had to take Bubu with her because if she had not, Francis
~~~ld have s~id, "I thought yo,; told me that the people at th_e
funic were going to take his photo, because he was such a beautI-
l baby?" So she"took Bubu with her.
At the clinic, she was shown into a waiting-ro om, where there
~ere other women waiting. Two were undressed with their stock-
ings rolled down round their ankles, just as you arc when you are
CXpccting, and the doctor wants to examine you. They reminded
Adah of the pre-natal clinics. She was _now used to that sort of thing
- stripping yourself naked to be examined. It did not bother her any
rnore. She asked herself. why should it worry me? I've only got
what you've got. Why should I be ashamed of my body? It did not
matter any more.
Three screens were set up in the middle of th
Women -were to undress behind the screen and the s<:}uare room.
en sat down and
1 43

142
 , . h d aw her fix·
w~it t~ be called one by one into the h felt it? Supp osing e s
w1th buth- contr ol gear. docto rs room to be equipped the dark anyway. B?t suppo se e tm~n t with no bath room an
Adah saw a youn g West India n ing the cap in their one-r oomb~a~ dump ? She could not fix : :
. f the cap fell? It wo
and 15
sat down besid e her. She want ed to ~othe ~and purposely went with the toilet as filthy as a ru
was frigh tened and becau se th e on . ome groun d becaus e she cap in the toilet, for what woul d happ en ~O her Maker in no time
there holdi ng a baby Ad h ~ ~oung g,rJ was the only woman have collected enough germ s to se
nd her could get canc er
she went i b . . a cou ook after her baby for her when with cancer of the botto m. Adah was sur~ ': do now?
1 If only
woul d b F _to ;.equ ippe d, and she could look after Adah's. That
th easily from under there. Wha t was she goin g ed she was goin
g
the est air. . , _such ~oble thoug hts in her mind, she greeted Francis would be reasonable. Wha tever happ en '
b kW: _Indian girl with a friend ly smile. The girl smiled
ac . s owm g a golde n tooth wedg ed in between her ordinar
y to risk it. A cap was better than nothi ng. d the midw ife
y
teeth It came to her tum to go and see. the. docto r an It was a mess
~ho fixed you up with your own speClal size of cap. ldi Adah to
going
t0 They ~oon starte d to talk. She, the West India n girl was Job. They kept trying this and that .and kept sco n~a t woul
d
~e traine d as a nurse , so she neede d some form of birth-control relax otherwise she woul d go home with the wron g cap The fear
s be-
durm g her traini ng. Her husba nd did not mind. So, month not fit her properly and thal woul d mean anoth er child . .
th
the
fore, she was given the PiJJ. But, she cried to Adah, sec what of what Francis would say and what he woul d write to ~ m~n
15 ~r
Pm had done to her. She puJJed up her sleeves and showed Adah and her relations loome d, full of doom , in her subco nscio us. . Y
her
a very .fine rash. The rash was all over her face and neck. Even she could feel it. The other two femal es, who were now tut-tu tting
skinn y wrist s had not been spare d. She was covered with the
by prickl y heat
k~d
at her and growi ng impa tient and tellin g her to !elax her
lef;
of rash that remin ded Adah of the rash cause d 10 was be-
Afric a. ~uld not see the same pictu re that Adah was seem g. It
picture of her mothe r-in-l aw when she heard that Adah went
all thc
. "Do they make you scratc h? I mean , do you feel scratchy hind her husba nd's back to equip herse lf with some thin~
tbat
time? '' ren:
· liould allow her to sleep aroun d and not have any m~re child
"Yea h, man. That' s the troub le now. I don't mind the appear She Was sure they woul d interp ret it that way, know mg the PS,
ance. But they itch all the time. " chology of her peopl e. The sham e of it woul d kill her. Her
chi~-
Adah looke d at her face again and as she did so 'd the girl started let Fran~ ~
, . f~m. the dtcn's name would be smea red as well. God, don't
to scratch the back of her skirt. She was trying to hi e ,t
~d out. In desperation, the two wome n, the docto r and _the_ not
mt
,tchm:~
other wome n, trying to hide the fact that her bottom was 5
Wife gave her a size of cap that they thoug ht shoul d fit. If at
dad
help ~cm
God have mercy ! thoug ht Adah . Her bottom as well? ?en fit, it was not their fault, becau se Adah did not
domg .
od of what she was
asked the girl, "Hav e you got the itch down there as well? at_ all because she was feelin g so guilty
had got a cap
G signa ture, n~w she
The girl nodde d. She had it aJJ over her. Adah caJled to
t~ Fu~t she had forge d her husba nd's But
have mercy on her again . What was she to do now? Sh~ was
no Which she was sure was going to cause a row 1£ he found out. d
!•ke suppo se it work ed? That woul
going on the Pill if she was going to end up lookin g som; suppose he did not find out and
keep her new job and finish her
body with chick en-po x or scratching like this hgirl as ,f shle w d rncan no children and she woul d new
' . the an
Pil • she course in librarianship. With that happy thoug ht, she put the
cover ed w1'th yaws. No, she was not going to a:e 1 equipment in Bubu 's pram and went home .
· hen
she was not going home empty -hand ed with no birth-cont~ But when she got home, she was faced with anoth er probl ular
em.
only wort wwait
thoug ht about the jelly and knew that it would 0 H.ow was she to know what was going to happ en on a partic
the
husba nd and wife are in agreement, for he would hav\
ques· night? Must she then wear the cap every night ? That wasknew
until it melte d befor e comin g on. So the jelly was out of .t :tyesp sa.fcst thing, but the cap was not very comfo rtable and Adah
tion for her. She could only go for the cap. That ai;•r think that it wobb l~ and she had to walk funni ly to keep it
. Oh, God, if only they had
in. And of
an extra
She ha ~one in course Frano s would know
which is specially made for one's inside.
quickly. Franc is migh t not know. The business was always 1 45

1 44

~~m,. then F rands would not have to
irritating remarks about her see and watch and to make
Sh every move 1
e ran down to their back d ·1·
and. fitted herself with her ne::rap t~~~ th~tdhad no _e!cctric light
having their usual fight and .F ~ou hear T1ti and Vicky
h t , soon ranas would start calli f
er o come and quieten her child Sh fi
::~st goingf sick at the thought ;;~~ all~ A~~a~~~:~~
y sorry ?r doctors and nurses. The amount of messin th
~::~
. ng or
w:
have to do ~1th people's insides! She dashed up, for Fran!
~lr~ady calling her and asking her what the hell it was she was
omg down there in the toilet. Was she having another baby in
th~re? Adah looked blank and said nothing. The fact that she was
quiet made Francis suspicious. He then asked her what the matter
was. Adah said that nothing was the matter.
He looked at her again and asked "Have you got a boil or some-
thing?" • son Francis was severing the ties of friendship that existed be-
Adah turned round from where she was tucking the kids into bed
and asked, "What boil?"
And Francis, still looking intensely at her, replied: "Boil in the
leg. You walk funny."
Adah smiled, a wobbly, uncertain sort of smile, for he~ h~
was b~ting so fast and so loudly, the noise was like ~ N~,~
housewife pounding yams in her Odo. Her heart was going gblffl.
gbim, gbim," just like that. She was surprised and shocked to
realise that Francis could not hear the guilty beating of tbat
heart of hers. She thought everybody could hear it because it was so
loud to her that it hurt her chest, making it difficult t~ breath~
But she managed a smile, that sort of lying smile. And it work
wonders. all
. Then she said, just to press home another point, "You were at j
mg me so loudly when I was down there in the backyard, th .-
ran up the stairs, and I bumped my toe on one of them, and 1't bu,...
a bit."
Francis arched his brows but said nothing. d aded
Soon it was midnight, and the row which Adah had re,nar·
flared up. Francis got the whole truth out of her. So, she ~ed in
ried woman, married in the name of God and again mar{:, don
the name of the Oboshi, the goddess of Ibuza, cam~ to h. ~ack
and became clever enough within a year to_ go beh• nd h •~ t,een
and equip herself with a cap which he, Franos, was sute~ w the
invented for harlots and single women. Did Adah not 0
146
t she could take other men
grivity of what she had d~~ !:~ to kno\V that she ~~ ~!
behind his back. because O
going to do just that if she could go a: tf d et the gear behln
come and see and hear
back? Francis cal~ed all the other_ tenanent Adah who came to Lon-
about this great issue - how the mnoc lever Adah was h,appy
don only a year previously had br~ei:am:de F~ancis stop bitting
when Pa Noble came,_ beca~se at eas throbbed. Her mouth
her. She was di22y with pain ~d her_ head eedin she felt
was bleeding. And once or twice ~unng the proc
tempted to run out and call the police. But she
Where would she go after that? She had no fnen s
~our t ~er of it.
and she had
no relations in London. d
Francis made it clear that he was writing to his mother ";
father. Adah was not surprised at this. But she was frightened, or
despite everything she still respected her mo~er-in-law •. But her
tween Adah and his family. She knew that, after that, things were
not going to be the same any more. She cried then. _She w~
lonely again, just as she was when Pa died and Ma marned agam
and she had to live in a relative' s house.
Her marriage with Francis? It was finished as soon as Francis
called in the Nobles and the other tenants. She told herself that
sh~ could not live with such a man. Now everybody knew she was
being knocked about only a few weeks after she had come out of
hospital. Everybody ~ow knew that the man she was working for
and supporting was not only a fool, but that he was too much of a
foot to know that he was acting foolishly. Pa Noble reminded
~rands of Adah's health and God bless the old man, he sent all the
1~quisitive tenants away. There was nothing
bad in Adah getting
birth-control gear Pa Noble said, but she should have told her
husband. '
What was the point of Adah telling them that she had told her
husband and he had said you could control children by pouring
them on the floor? But it did not matter. She was almost twenty-
o?e· And, among her people, a girl of ~.enty-one was no longer a
gul, but a woman who could make deas1ons. Let Francis write t 0
her people an~ his people. If she liked, she would read th .
letters if she did not she could throw them into the fir Th cir
person, that mattered was h er b rother. She would writ e. d C only
.
the truth. Boy had never liked Francis anyw H can tell him
fore Adah found out that Francis looked lik a~ e knew even be-
e ose men who could
x,n
live off women because of his good looks. Adah had just left
school and was full of the religious idea that you could change
anybody by your own personal example and by prayers. She was
wrong and Boy her brother was right.
A few weeks later, Francis had his examination result, and it
was another failure. Of course the fault was Adah's, especially as
she managed to scrape through a part of her library examination.
To explain his failures Francis wrote to his parents about the cap.
But by the time their reply came, Adah was being eaten up by an·
other problem. She was pregnant again.
12.
.
The Collapse
Yes, A~ah was pregnant again. This time she did not c~, she did
:ot wn~g her hands, but behaved philosophically. If this pattern
as going to be her lot in life she would do all she could to
change ·it, but what was she going to do if all her efforts f at·1e d=>·
an:~ Went to her Indian doctor. She told him her w?ole story
was nat she wanted the pregnancy terminated. The Indian doc_tor
. ot a young man at all but he had a certain way of saymg
th 1ngs d •
Youn an was so small that one could easily take him for a
wer &:;:an. He had made good in London and had two sons who
rnet hth up at Cambridge; he had married a woman doctor he
the hlacen ~e _was_ a student himself. He was very popu_lar among
&ues dks hvi~g 1n that part of Kentish Town at the time. Adah
a s~:en t~at tf she appealed to him, being Indian and once
li t in London, he would understand her predicament.
shou~d~der stood, shook his head, sympathised and said, "You
cheap 0 ave come to us for the cap. The ones sold at the clinic are
about I.t~es
,
and they go loose quickly. You should have told me
sh~a~ was very nice. That was what Adah ought to have done if
like a ~nown. But how was she supposed to know? Smell it out
wa·/ Witch doctor? Had he and his wife not put a notice in the
ha~tg·room_ a~_ut the _danger of smoking? Could they not have
had a s,m,har nottce to say that birth control was available
f or the
it b ask'mg.? 1twas too late now. She was pregnant she knew
..; _::~ th~ doctor told her that it was too early for confir:nation He
0
WouId g,ve
work.her some white pills. Adah was to take them and ~hey
Adah wondered what those pills
in her state of apathetic resignatiower~ me~nt to do for her. But
The pills were going to terminate thn, s e d,d not ask questions.
was going to be terminated wh t e pregn3:ncy. If the pregnancy
How did she know he wo~ld a twas_ the point of telling Francis;>
no misunderstand? Even if he did
1 49
 !~
understand, how could she be sure he was not oin t eat .
~~byle~:~tis )arents an? to everybody? c!uld~;
.• ,
::c Fe;;:
am telling you this under the seal of the
confessional. You must not repeat it .. Th t Id be .
possible. . a wou im-
She now saw th·1s situation
· · as a challenge, a new challenge.
When. she was little and alone, the challenge had been that of
educating hersel~, existing through it all, alone, all by herself. She
had ,hored that m marriage she could get herself involved in her
man s life and he would share the same involvement in hers. She
had gambled with marriage, just like most people, but she ha_d
gambled unluckily and had lost. Now she was alone again with this
new challenge that included her children as well. She was going
to live, to survive to exist through it all. Some day, help woul_d
come from somewhere. She had been groping for that help if
she were in the dark. Some day her fingers would touch someth~ng
solid that would help her pull herself out. She was becoming
aware of that Presence again _ the Presence that had directed her
through childhood. She went nearer to It in her prayers. She n:;.er
knelt down to pray in the orthodox way. But she talked ~ed i:
while stirring peppery African soup on her cooker; she_tal the
Him when she woke up in the morning; she talked to Him aII
time, and Adah felt that He was always there. . En land.
There was no time to go to church and p~ay. _Not i~rch !,hich
It took her years to erase the image of the Nige~ian c\ London,
usually had a festive air. In England, especially . 1d
0
7
5
"church" was a big grey building with stained-glass wm 0 ~mpty
high
ornamental ceilings, very cold, full of row_s and row~ distant
chairs, with the voice of the vicar drom~g fro"! th: wilder·
pulpit, crying like the voice of John the Baptist lost m
ness. In London, churches were cheerless. d her cry to
She could not then go to any of them because it ?1a~geria, you
see such beautiful places of worship empty whenh 1; to stand out·
could hardly get a seat if you came in lat~. You a But you were
side and follow the service through a microphone. t the songs -
happy through it all, you were encouraged to bello~~uause most of
that bellowing took away some of your sorr~ws. e was always
0 .
the hymns seem to be written by psychologts~~ ~e near to th;
sure of singing or hearing something that wou h coh In Englan
problem you had in mind bf e ore comm·gtocurc.
you were robbed of such comfort. ..-
. dah' 5 gregational God, created
London, having thus killed A con and reall alive. She
instead a personal God who loomed_ large He was ftways there,
did not have to go to church to see this One. h tucking
when she was shelving books in the library, when s .e wasSh
her babies up to sleep when she was d omg · anything · e grew
nearer to Him, to the' people with whom she worked, bu~ away
from Francis. The gulf between them which had gr~w~ with her
stay in the hospital had been made deeper by the cap incident, and
now this new child would make it greater still. But sh~ was n~t
going to tell Francis and she did not feel guilty about it. Franas
would not be of any help. _ . .
She concentrated on working and enJoymg her new Job.
It_was at the Chalk Farm Library that she met Peggy, the Irish
girl_with a funny hair style, who was heartbroken _because _her
Italian summer-holiday boy friend did not fulfil his promises.
Pe~ had gone on holiday the summer before, just to en_ioy th_e
Italian sun and the Roman scenery. She got involved with this
ha_ndsome Italian youth, surprisingly tall for an Italian, but Peggy
said he was Italian. It was love at first sight, and many promises
Were_made. Peggy was a library assistant and the young man was
reading Engineering in a university, the name of which Adah had
forgotten . The young man seemed to have forgotten the promises
he had made Peggy, and she was threatening to go to the address
he gave her to find him and give him a piece of her mind. The talk
w_as always of this young man and what Peggy was going to do to
hun, and how she was going to get her own back. Peggy never
really told Adah what it was she had given him that pained her so
rnuch. But she let Adah know that she gave so much that she would
regret it all her life. She was twenty-three, not very beautiful but
srnall and fun to be with.
Then there was the big boss, Mr Barking. He was thin and bad-
tempered, but without a touch of malice. His daughter had mar-
ried a worthless fellow and he was determined to squash that mar-
riage if it cost hi~ h_is l!fe. That daughter was ill because of the
mental cruelty being mlhcted ~n h~r by this no-good husband. Mr
Barking nev~r ta~ked about his wife; he had got 50 used to her
being there, m his ho~e, that she was never discussed Th "f,
of his made good chicken sandwiches Adah h d · Mat WI e
·ing munch.mg and munch"mg away at ·lots of chicka seen r Bark-
in the staff room, and sometimes they mad h en s_andw1ches
one. e er feel like having
1
I
:iij 151
 Bill was a big handsome Canadian; Adah did not know why he
had com7 to Eng!and in the first place, because he looked down
0
_n anytlun~ English. He. used the word "Britisher" for the Eng-
lish, Just like the Americans do. Even his Christmas cake was
fl~wn out from Canada. His mother sent him clothes, food, every·
thing._ H 7 would not study for the British Library Association
~xammattons because he did not trust the British system of educa·
hon. He had married the children's librarian the year before. Her
name was Eileen and she was tall and beautiful, a more perfect
match you could never imagine. But Bill knew a little about
everything. He liked black writers. Adah did not know . any
black writers apart from the few Nigerian ones, like Chmua
Achebe and Flora Nwapa, and she did not know that there were
any other black writers. Bill tut-tutted at her and told her what a
shame it was that an intelligent black girl like her should ~;w~
little about her own black people. Adah t_houg~t about 1 that
realise? that Bill was right. He was an . mtelhgent ma~ he
Canadian, and Adah liked him a Jot. Dunng ~he staff brks He
would talk and expand about authors and their new boo . · d
would then request it and the Camden Boroug? would ":_a:!i•
:::d
he would read it first; then he would pass it 0 ~ to an other
she would pass it to Peggy. Peggy would pass it t~ i:oks. It
members of the staff who were in the mood to r:a She came
was through Bill that Adah knew of James Baldwt· t"ful. She
to believe, through reading Baldwin, that black was he:ub;ack was
asked Bill about it and he said, did she not know t a
beautiful. "d her family.
Bill was the first real friend she had had outs• e Jet her
She had a tendency to trust men more beeaus e her "d never
Pa ding an d
.
down. She had alread y cultivate d th e tas te for
. w1 "th.
e reatwo 'years
Bill, whose wife was expecting a second ch_ild wi ;~ Adah was
of their marriage, was always in the mood for literary ::en ·quoting to
fascinated. She even started reading Marx and was oh would Jeave
st
herself that if the ~orst ca'?e to the very wo~ \ : lose but her
Francis with her children smce she had nothing
chains. . which the Jibrarf
;°
She got into the light-hearted atmospher~ a half-caste West
staff did their work. There was anothe_r g~ificult to claim to. be
Indian, one of the people who found it di that stage forcing
black. She liked Adah because Adah was.: t r made her forget
everybody to like her. The people at that Ii ra Y
152
roubles then. Bill's wife
her troubles. Everybody seemed ~o have t ve small. He was toy-
was having another baby and their flat -:1'as :')'b for he had been
ing with the idea of going back to ht~ old JO ' h re in the first
uadio news-caster in Canada. Why dtd ~e come t:ntatively, that
place? Adah had wondered. He gave the hmt, veryd have organ-
he was ~ning away from his mother who seeme t~nd to escape,
1scd a girl she wanted him to marry. He came to Engl d to
rot then he had met Eileen. Poor man, he was too han some
be left alone. He was a six footer. Peggy's problem wasrr:;on:r
10
take her to Italy where she hoped to get a working ho I ay m
orde'. to look for' the young Italian who had lied to her. Ml;
Barking seldom joined in their light-hearted talk, but th ey. a
knew he was thinking of his daughter. Fay did not l~e to associate
herself with the black people because she was too whit~, a ~ulatto~
So, to press home this point, when she qualified as a hbranan,. sh
!ot ~ngaged to this English man who was away in _Cambn~ge
:ding Law. Adah never saw this man, but she saw Fays car wh•~
Fas so_ smashed that it was going to cost Fay a fortune to repair.
ay _said her boy friend had smashed it. Adah was sorry for her,
~articular~y as, although she was very beautiful in a filn:i-S tar typ~
way_ with smooth, glossy skin, a perfect figure and thick beauti
I hair, she was at least thirty. And thirty seemed an en?rmous
~ge to Adah at the time. A woman of thirty and not marned was
0
her an outrage then.
When everybody started talking about their problems, Adah
Would start laughing. ? ..
Peggy would say, "What the bloody hell are you laughing for·,
11-t_en Bill would reply for her: "She h~ no problems. She s
happily married to a brilliant husband who 1s rcadmg to be a Cost
and Works accountant, and she is already going through all her
library examinations . .....
Adah would not contradict him. Was the world not too full of
sadness? What was the point of telling them all her woes. Yes,
they all believed she had no problems because she wanted them all
to believe that.
Three months pass~ speedily in this way and she knew that the
pills the doctor had given her had not worked. She told herself not
to panic. Women had been caught in worse situations before.
Francis wo':'ld only laugh '."'d say : "l thought you were being
clever, getting th e. cap b_ehind my back."' She had been throu h
the wo<St. Even his beatings and slapp· d"d t h g
tngs 1 no move er any
1 53

more. S~e ~d not ~no~ where she got her courage from, but she
was begmnmg to hit him back, even biting him when need be. If
that was the I..nguage he wanted, well, she would use it. Was she
not the greatest biter in her school? Francis threatened to break all
her teeth for her, and grew his nails as long as those of a tiger,
s? whenever Adah opened her mouth to bite, Francis would dig his
tiger nails into her flesh, almost choking her. Then the thought
struck her that she could be killed and the world would think it
was an accident. Just a husband and wife fighting. She still hit
back occasionally when she knew she was near the door or out of
danger, but she gave in to his demands for the sake of peace. They
were like the demands of a wicked child who enjoys torturing a
live animal given to him as a pet.
Adah wanted to know the truth from the doctor before she
started looking for a room for herself and her children. Mr Noble
~as fed up with their fights and had asked them to mov~: To cap
it all, the women in the house wrote Adah an open petition beg·
ging her to control her husband because he was chasing them allf
The letter was posted unsealed 'and sent to the wrong branchC::
the library. So other library as;istants could read it if they Iik ·
Adah was not worried, she was going anyway. .
She waited patiently for her tum at the surgery, then went
The doctor greeted her and asked her how she was and she said'
"'The child is sitting there pretty. It did not come out as ; ~h School, she had raised their hopes higher when she got
me believe it was going to.'" Her voice was low and paru Y 0
the first time. •11 her
The l~k the doctor gave her was terrible. It seemed to ~arker.
blood. Hts dark Indian skin seemed to have gone a shade. as
H e was m aki·ng an effort to speak but t h e anger 10· side him w the
choking him so that he gobbled feebly just like kettle _on ou
boil ... then just like a kettle he spluttered : "I did not give Y
the pills to abort the child."
Adah recoiled like a frightened snake, but again, J,ke
.
aJ nake
thi;
she was gathering all her inner energy ready to • : voice
frightened little man . What did he mean? Adah asked; 1 d~gging
that had a tinge of brutal harshness in it. She felt .ke a dead
her teeth into those eyes that were popping out 1i e
fish's. ,
"All right, so I am having the baby. But I II _tell r~ this, the
know it,
pills you gave me were abortive and you know it~nthe first feW
because I carry the child and know what happen
154
child is imperfect in any way,
fflks you gave them to me. If m~.
yoo are responsible.You know that. er own home, but to •
She walked out of the surgery, not to ht d wn thinking. She
O
puk near Gospel Oak vill~ge ~d th en sa en • but to have it
had suspected something like this wou~d happ 'ied for herself,
roofumed this way made her feel a tr~tor · She: born child.
she cried for her children, and she cr~ed f?r ; ununfortunate
Suppose the child was born imperf~, 1ust like ~s~er thou hts
thalidomide babies, what was she gomg to do thh~ · . s sling
went to her brother Boy who had sent her all is saving • . .
her to leave Franci~ and his children and come back to Nigena
where her work at the Consulate would be waiting for her.
poor Boy, he was very much annoyed over the cap issue w
!?l
Francis had written to his parents about. This child would give
th
em another song to sing. They would ask why'. if she was 0 ~
btrth-<ontrol, which she went and got herself, did she then
com~ pregnant? They would say the child was not her husbands,
~at ,t d probably be a white child. You know, like the people who
ed the cap. And then everybody would laugh. Her own people
:uld cover their faces in shame. She found hers~lf being grate-
ha th a_t her parents were dead. This would have killed t~em.
Ii~1 taiscd everybody's hopes when she was at the Methodist Girls
~rings of "A" levels by taking correspondence cour~, and the
;pcs_ were being realised when she was in a good Job at the
mencan Consulate. If only she had stopped then. She could have
Passed the rest of her examinations by correspondence. After all,
~as. lb~dan University not a branch of the great London
nivers1ty she was so mad about?
But would her children have been in this kind of nursery school
~here they were then? She got confused. Had it all been worth
1t?
Then a hand touched her shoulder. The hand was a black man"s.
Adah jumped. Sitting there, thinking and shedding silent tears,
she had not heard the man cross the park. He was an African a
Nigerian. And when he spoke, Adah knew he was Ibo. '
"You·ve had a fight with your husband,. ,
Adah did not answer . Then the tnan w~t .
"My name is Okpara. and 1 know on ·
marks on your fa.cc. I don"t want to you are 1~ becau,sc of the
beg his forgiveness. He would let 1:'e~~ an~lung. Let s go and
you in. Typical Ibo psychology;
'55

~en never do wrong, only the women; they have to beg for for-
gth1ven~s, becaus_e they are bought, paid for and must remain like
at, silent obedient slaves.
Adah showed him the way to her house. Had not the magic
~sword "Ibo" been uttered? The man talked all the way about
this and that. He had a wife, too, with a baby boy, and he had read
Law. They h~d been here some time and were getting ready
to go home m about four months. His wife was a secretary
and he worked in the Civil Service here. He had now finished his
studies. But, he told Adah, they still quarrelled, though he
would never beat his wife. He had outgrown that, but they still
quarrelled. These quarrels did not mean the end of marriage. He
reminded Adah of an old Ibo saying.
"Don't you remember, or have you forgotten, the saying of our
people, that a husband and his wife always build their home for
many things but particularly for quarrels? A home is where you
quarrel in." Adah nodded, she did remember.
She should have asked Mr Okpara whether the old peopl_e lived
in one room, whether the men gave babies to their "'.'ives m ~ch
quick succession. Had not her Ma told her that during her bm~
they used to nurse and breast-feed a child for at least three Y~·
At least those men, the men of the time Mr Okpara was tallcing
about, had other amusements. They had their tribal dances, they
had their age-group meetings from which they arri,·ed too drunk
with palm-wine to have the energy to ask for their wives. Super·
s!:itjon pJayed a big role in the lives of those peopl~; if Y0 ~/Jfl
with your wife when she was nursing a child, the child wou _od !Cf
so husbands abstained from their nursing wives for a pen Th0
three years. Many men were polygamous for this re~so"j;
would build a separate hut for the nursing wife, penswn er ~d
for that long period and take in a childless one. These peop Ie cou
afford to build a house in which to quarrel. . th same
But not in London, where her Francis sat all week ~n 00::k and
room by the same kitchen table turning the pages of tb:s to watch
as.t~
that book, getting up only to eat or go down t~ the No~t~ as those
their television. Francis could never have a mmd Yd that it
men Again it struck her that their plan had fai e ' an k all the
had .all been her fau 1t. Shh
e s ou Id not h ave ag reedtowor ·
k . t like this
ed
time. She should have encouraged Francis to wor i;::r husband
man's wife whom she had not seen, had cncourati· one and he
to work. F;ancis would have met other men, like is ' ca. 0
156
too late she consoled herself.
wwld lu.ve copied them. 1~ was not o do It might even still sa~e
That was what she was going to try t Ok · studied privately in
the marriage. Afte~ all ~ad not rtifi~r far:ead of going to watch
the evenings and still gamed a cc cate ms
the television from six o' ~ock to_closcdown? she still maintained to
To Mr 0kpara she said nothing beca~sc her own
hc11Cl! that failure to make her mamagc work was ful one
affair. She did not mind listening to the story of a succ~ b t sh~
111d maybe getting some tips on how to ~akc hers wor uk ara
was not letting this stranger know. Why did she allow Mr O P
to come home with her? Adah herself did not know the answer.
She did not tell the man anything even though her mind was cry-
ing for someone to listen to her' to understand her. Y ct she felt
tlu.t by Wlting to this stranger, ~lthough he was kind and _an Ibo
like herself she would be betraying her husband, her family, her
cbildr~. Y~u don't tell people your troubles whe~ you arc still _in
lhe midst of them, otherwise it makes them bigger, more m-
saluble. You tell people when it's all over, then others can learn
:irn YOUt mistakes, and then you can afford to laugh over it. Be-
alJ.USe by then they have stopped hurting, you have passed them
' have grtduated from them.
1?ey got into their room. The scene that met their eyes was
cornica1, and that was an understatement. Vicky was sitting on the
settee, waving his wet nappy in the air like a flag. Titi was
1rchcd on the bed, looking thougptfully at Vicky and their
tthcr. 'Bubu was lying fiat on his back in the cot, listening to the
SOngs Francis was singing to his children from the Jehovah's Wit-
nesses handbook, looking as untidy as ever. His unshaved face be-
~c more noticeable now that Mr Okpara was in the room. The
:~t, ~er was darker than Francis; he was not tall, about five foot
the same height as Francis, but he was immaculate. His
hite shirt was du.ding, and the fact that he was very black
t.tonou~ccd ~e whiten~ still further. He was wearing a black
~piece suit, and h15 black shoes shone. His black briefcase
added to his dignity somehow and the black rolled umbrella he
".'as carrying completed the image - a black clerk in Britain com-
ing home from the city.
!'-5 for Franc(s, to '."dah h~ did not look like the image of an •
th,ng. He was Just hunself, )Ust Francis Obi d Adah Y
th1.t if she was going to model him , a~ saw then
O\q,ua, she was going to have .. big ;ghnt~ ,mdagef hof this ~r
er. Franos
I~7

was Francis, no! ashamed of being Francis, and was not going to
change, even if Adah brought two hundred successful Ibo
students to show him. He was proud to be what he was and Adah
had bett~r start getting used to him that way or move out.
. Francis swore to Mr Okpara that he did not touch Adah. "She
simply went out. I did not know where, but I knew she would come
back because she can't bear to leave her children for long. I did
not beat her. Did she say that?"
Okpara was not daunted. They were not happy, Adah was not
happy and this country was a dangerous place to be unhappy in,
because you have nobody to pour out your troubles to, so that was
why most lonely African students usually had emotional break·
downs because they had no one to share their troubles with. Did
Francis want his wife to have such a breakdown? Okpara asked.
Would that not be a drain on his purse?
This startled Francis and Adah. She did not know that people
still lived like that, the husband paying for the doctor's bills. Even
in Nigeria, whenever it was necessary for a private doctor_ to be
called, she had always paid. She could not remember Fran~s ever
paying for anything like that. Okpara was out of touch with the
problem at hand, and Francis, now confused with. anger,_~ e
and disappointment, resented this intrusion into his family h e.
Adah hurried to make coffee. . complete human like a man.
She did not know that Francis had come to such a situatton
that he had told himself subconsciously that he would . never
pass his examinations. He had as it were told himself that his ever
becoming a Cost and Works accountant in this world was a dream-
She did not know that for this reason he would do
thing to make Adah a failure like himself. He could not e P
ev;r
it, it was human nature. He was not a bitter man. e and
He lashed his tongue at Okpara, told him to g~ back ho~k ara
mind his own business. It was then that Adah reahsed th at Id lave
was English only on the surface. An English person wo~bo and
this was an Ibo family in trouble, and he not ~
1
:ey
felt insulted and would leave. But not Okpara. He w_as to 'ieave
would
until he had made them promise to pay a visit: 50 had relations
see how the Okparas lived. He asked Adah if sh
in London. Could they not intervene for her? . in London,
and the few distant ones would simply laugh. They;~
Adah thought this over. She had no close relauv:d say : "Vie
thought she was the educated lady who knew all
answers. Did
158
. that man? Did she not make
we not warn her against marrym~ .t I" So Adah shook her head
10 1
her own bed? Well, let her sleep ·
and said she had nobody• . d Francis to be a man,
After coffee, Okpar~ ta~ked an~ ad~1seen from the hymn book
Staying at home, and smgmg to his ~ildl d lothe his family, to
of the Jehovah's Witnesses would not ee an c t et a job a.pd
siy nothing of his old parents at home. So he mus g letely
. . f th
study m the evenmgs. A ter a11, e su bJ
. ects . notanhood
were comp and .
new to him any more. Otherwise he would lose his .•
these children that he was singing to would soon reahse that it was
their mother that bought them clothes and food.
Francis stared at him as he said this, because it was a_ great
humiliation to an African not to be respected by his own children.
Okpara noticed that he had touched a soft spat for he then banged
at_the kitchen table, just to emphasise his paint. He we?t on and
said did Francis not know that the children born in thlS country
get clever right from their mothe.r' s stomach? They know and they
can remember what goes on around them. So if Francis wanted
to hold the respect of his two sons, he'd better know what he was
doing. Okpara did not mention Titi, she was only a girl, a second-
class human being; it did not matter whether she respected her
~athcr or not. She was going to grow into an ordinary woman not
ticr In the weeks and months that followed Okpara and his pretty
wife did their best but Francis would always be Francis. He
ad been used to being worked for, by a woman whom he knew
bc~onged to him by right. Adah could not escape because of the
cluldren or so Francis thought.
When she told him she was expecting another child, the laughter
that greeted this announcement was like a mad monkey's in the
?oo. lt was so animal-like, so inhuman, so mirthless, and yet so
b~tal. Adah was sure she was five months gone before she told
h,m: She had first got over the pain in her own mind, but was still
anxious about the perfection of the baby. She worried about that
sometimes, but one thing she had learnt from Bubu's confinement
was that she was r:iot going ~o ~at hospital as a poor nigger woman.
H 7r b_aby was going t~ arrive tn style. She knitted and sewed, and
this. time her maternity grant was not going to Francis. She was
buymg a brand-new pram, a new shawl and a new fi f
sell for when she came out of the hosp· tal Sh
x59
1 •
ouWt t or h~r-
e met a est Indian

girl ~ho had had a baby girl by a Nigerian; but the man had not
mame~ h~r because, according to him, the child was not his It
was this girl who showed Adah that you could live on what ~as
called. the Assistance until your children grew up and you could
get a Job. Adah _h~d heard ~f thi~ Assistance before, in Nigeria;
she learnt about 1t m her Social History lessons. She did not know
that she could still claim it. If only she had known she would have
left Francis earlier. But she did not know. ' more. She had three children to think about and soon there would be
She addressed twenty greeting cards to herself, gave three
pounds to Irene, the girl, and told her to pest three cards a day
after the baby was born. Two big bunches of flowers were to b_e
sent to her, one on her arrival, with Francis's name attached to it
with sentimental words. The other one was to arrive at the hospital
after her safe delivery. But if she did not survive the birth, Irene
was to put Adah's children's names on it and make it into a wreath.
Irene got sentimental and started to cry; Adah told her not to,
because we all have to die some time. She was sure that if she was
going to be operated upon like before, she did not have much
chance. But the Indian doctor, now sorry for what he had do~e,
had become Adah's strongest ally. The chances of her not bemg
operated upon were fifty-fifty. Adah knew that if there was one
. . · t take that one
smgle chance of her not bemg cut up, she was g?mg O . sh h d
chance. Her body had a way of rejecting anythmg foreign, ack~ ~o
known that too. So instead of handing over her pay P h she
Francis to dole out the two pounds for hous~keepingt!~d ~:r to
would buy everything the doctors and the midwives . p0rtant
eat. Francis raised many rows, but "'."dah had a m;~J i:e could
thing to worry about - her unborn chi!~. I~ w~ s~ s hen she was
hardly feel it. Her figure did not get big like ~t did w "bed
having the others. But she kept strictly to the diet p~escri a.; of re-
It was then that she was introduced to the mo ern wd 50 easy
Jaxation birth. Adah attended all the ~lasses. I~a~/::::ced with
that she regretted the unnecessary pam she h~ Pf her confine-
the other children. She did not lie about the ate~. rest before
ment and she was determined to have her four w
going into hospital.
The money was not enough to go roun
d and she told F~cis,
ch"Jdren are mine,
.
" From now on, fend for yourself. I know the id work. If not,
must go out an
because they need to be f_ed · Y . Fr •
I shall only cater for my children. . Adah said nothmg,
Francis told her that she could not do ,t.
t work She cared about
but carried out her plans. He must go out O • • both in size
bis studies and all that but the children were growing .
and in number To"" ~e first. They had a right to happmess ast
· ·, · d :wn the statemen
wcll, not just Francis. He told her to wnte O • ' th t
that she would not feed him any more. Adah wrote it WI f :
any hesitation. If the world was going to blame he~ for not e •
ing her able-bodied husband, let it go ahead. She did not care any
four.
They were sorry at the Chalk Farm Library that she w~
going. She was sorry too, but there, in that library, she dis-
covered a hidden talent which she did not know she had before -
the uninhibited ability to make friends easily. People had a way
of trusting her easily because she was always trying to laugh how·
ever bad the situation. She learned to avoid gloomy people; th~
made ~er unhappy. So, since she could not avoid seeing Franos
and his sad face she shut him off from her mind's eye. She saw
him but her mi~d did not register him any more. She heard him
say that he had reported her to a Ministry or Board or_ some-
thing because she had signed that she would not feed him a~y
more. Adah waited for the Law to come for her, but the Law did
not.
He came with her to the hospital in the ambulance, though. On
:e second morning of her stay, her big bunch of flowers arrived.
thee t8:1'lc was gay with cards even before Dada arrived. She came
nig~t. sm_all, but painless, and perfect. Adah was sure that the
~ tld arrived m the world smiling and laughing. She was so small,
:S than five _pounds in weight, but beautiful, just like a black
0 11- and a girl. Adah was thankful for this child so perfect and
so beautiful that she nicknamed her "Sunshine".'
She came home by herself in a taxi, and did it in style. She made
:erybody believe that she had wanted it so to surprise her hus-
hand. She did not tell them that Francis had refused to come for
ttr. They would start to pity her, and she could do without that. She
pped the nurses generously and they all laughed and thanked
her. When she goth
ome, she wrote a very ruce. letter to them all
a°~!:
thanki
what and sh~ could hear them in her mind's car saying
the world B:rusAfrican ~omai:i she was. She had no troubles in
significant· Th c of this attitude her problems became in-
ey were all part of her life
H ungcr· drove
·
anc,.s to work as a clerical officer in the post
161
office. Adah's hopes rose. This might save the marriage aft all
But she was disappointed. Fr~cis would pay the rent and stil~~av;
h~r only two pounds for the six of them and nothing more. Adah
did not know . how much he was earning or when he was paid.
She warned him, though, that she was going into the Civil Se •
vice herself, and that she was going to do the same thing. Sh:
would not pay the rent, because it was a man's job to do that she
would not contribute to the food budget, because was she n~t his
wife? She would only be responsible for her children, their
clothes, the nursery fees and anything else the children needed.
But Francis would not know how much she earned or on what
date, because he had started it. He told her that she could not do
that because she was his wife. He could refuse to allow her to go
out to work. Then Adah retorted saying :
"This is England, not Nigeria. I don't need your signature to
secure a job for me."
But Adah hoped and prayed that this new sense of awareness
and of pride in himself would continue. He bought himself
a suit and shirts, he bought a small transistor radio, which Adah
and the children were not allowed to touch and which he carried
with him wherever he went, to work and even to the toilet
Adah laughed inside herself, and said how like a small boy Fran·
cis could be. She paid for her own food and the children's from
the little savings she had collected from her superannuation P'r·
For the roof over their heads, she paid by being a wife to Franas
at night, and by washing his endless shirts. . If Francis had been an Englishman, or if rr~nClstAdah would
Her baby grew stronger, and she paid off her conscience by
breast-feeding her. She was not going to bottle-feed th(s on~. She
had read somewhere that breast-fed babies were more mtelligent,
and grew stronger, than those fed from the bottle. She learned,
too, that there was less likelihood of the mother becoming prcg·
nant again if she did that. So she breast-fed her child.
Things seemed to be working out well, but Adah's money was
running short, and the children needed new clothes. She worked
out a timetable, and found that she could manage to have th~
hours of quiet each afternoon. Then her old dream came popp~ng
up. Why not attempt writing? She had always wanted to wnt~
Why not? She ran to Foyle's and bought herself a copy of Te{I(
Yourulf to Write and sat down throughout all those months when
she was nursing Dada and wrote the manuscript of a book she was
going lo call The Bride Price.
162
13
The Ditch Pull
. May and since
D dawas bo mm
' mmer was glorious. a ·t I the sun had never
That year s su f the hosp I a
Adah had brought her hom~ com le sa that, in Englan?, 1ong
stopped shining. The English 1:'P d ho~rible winters, which may
warm summers always follow co ;nthe sa ing was correct. .
or may not be so, but for that yeabee e ~or the first time m her
Adah enjoyed it all the _more, nl a~~ted five months, but how
life she was a real housewife. It o y ve continued that way. She
she wished that her life pattern coul~ haD da because she had told
did not rush back to work after having a d r five she could not
her husband that with four children all i;;. ti~ narde had been put
bear to leave them with another wo~an. :ton School, just off
10
down for a nursery school attache d day was to take Titi
Queen's Crescent. All Adah had to o eve e the three babies
to school, do her shopping at the Cr:cent, them their lunch,
to the park for an hour or two, come ome, giv .
tuck them up to rest, and write her The B~zde Prz<_e. ad not been
Francis but somebody else, it would_ ha:e wor e a~ ife She
have willingly packed up her studies Just t~ be a ~usew d was
had been reading a great number of women s magazmes, a_n b
surprised to read of mothers saying that they were bored JUst e-
ing housewives. She was not that type of woman. Ther: were so
many things she planned to do, and she di~ them_. She ~mtt:d end·
less jwnpers and cardigans for e:'eryb_ody, mcludmg thick big ones
for Francis. It was a way of telling him that that was all she asked
of life. Just to be a mother and a wife. .
But Francis was from another culture. There was a conflict go·
ing on in his head. What was the point of marrying an educated
woman? WhY-had-his-parents been .asked to"pay a· big price if all
she was going to do was to come to England and start modelling
h_cr life on that of English women, not wanting to work, just sit-
ting there cloing nothing but washing the babies' nappies? To
163
him he was being ch~ated. He had to work, study in the evenings
and on Saturdays whilst Adah sat there doing nothing. He started
to stay away from work on any pretext. When it rained heavily,
Francis was sure he would catch cold. He would not leave home
until it was about ten minutes to nine, and he was supposed to be
at work by nine. Adah pointed out to him over and over again
that it would take him at least thirty minutes to get to his place of
work. But Francis did not listen to her. The first glamour of his
new power, the power gained by the knowledge that, for the first
time in their married life, he was bringing in the money, had died.
He saw that Adah was not moved by this new power because ~e
money he gave her for housekeeping was just enough to buy his
own food. Adah did not mind. When she had spent all her super·
annuation she was going to start taking in clothes to sew for the
clothing factory off the Crescent. The man who owned the fa~ory
was pleased with the specimen she had shown him and ~romis~
to give her a part-time job when she was ready. Adah liked ~IS
because it meant she could work at home and look after the diil·
dren, but the best reason was that Francis would be away fr?m
home, rubbing shoulders with other men. Just fancy her, being
married at last in the real sense, just like any other woman, ch of
It was in that happy mood that she went to the small bran ·se
Woolworth's off the Crescent and bought four school eicer~e
books, and started to scribble down The Bride Price. The m:e en·
wrote, the more she knew she could write an_d the more d do it,
joyed writing. She was feeling this urge : W r,te; go on an gh she
you can write. When she finished it and read it all th:u w~rid,
knew she had no message with a capital "M" to tell e senti·
because it was full of scenes with sickly adolescent Jove kc the
·I
ments. A recent film which she had seen not long ago a~d. 'fhe
same feeling in her as that first literary attempt of ~ers that Vias
story was over-romanticised. Adah had put everything V1ritin8
lacking in her marriage into it. During the time Vla5Writing,
it, she was oblivious of everything exc~pt her chi!. re~t 111attered
to her, was like listening to good sentimental music. ttered Vias
little to her whether it was published or not, all that ma
that she had written a book. nother Clll·
':{°
In her happiness she forgot that Francis came fr ;apt to nl!'II
ture, that he was not one of those men who wou1 ~-u the sa.tlle.
s:
demands with ease, that his ideas about women wer~ Vlith at anY
To him, a woman was a second-class human, to be s ep
) time, even during the day, and, if she refused, to have sense
beaten into her until she gave in; to be ordered . out of bed after
he had done with her· to make sure she washed his cloth~ and got
his meals ready at the right time. There was no need to )la~e _an
intelligent conversation with his wife because; yo1.n ee,sh"f'iiilght-··-·
start getting ideas. Adah knew sh~ ~ ~ ~is flesh . ~he
understood what he was going through bec~~si: h.e. ~ ~ ~ ~g ,,
so. But although she was sorty. for,him, altboµgh s~e.. Uf! erst~ d.
all that was happening to him, she was not going to .be
of a wife. Francis could beat her to death but she was not going to
stoop to that level. But all the time she kept hoping that his long
stay in England would change him. Did.they not come to England
for further studies? Surely he would change somehow. Adah knew
that she ":'as changing herself. Many things that had mattered and
?ad_worned her before had becom~ l1:5s .im.portant_. For instance,
it did not matter to her any more whether she became a librarian or
a ~eamstress. What mattered was that she should not be bothered
~th unhappiness, because she wanted to radiate happiness to all
~~se around her. And when she was happy, she noticed that her
h ildren w~re happy too. But when they saw their father slapping
. er or telling her off, they clung to her afraid their eyes roam-
Ing thi s way and that way in childish terror. ' '
She was going to show The Bride Price to Francis, to sho_whim
h at she cou Id wnte
th · an d that she had not been wasting • -her
~ time as
e thought. But first she must take the manuscript to her friends
at the Chalk Farm Library
Bill read it and so did Peggy and the others. She thought they
lau~h and_tell her that it was a good first attempt. But Bill
. h" it quite senously. She should show it to somebody in pub-
Iris h"mg'· Th.is scare d Adah . She did · not know anybody in pub-
is mg, she did not know whether she could type the whole lot. It
was
so h' sof enormous ' th at manuscnpt. · The words, simple not
i/as1s.'fc~tted at all, kept pouring from her mind. She had w'ritten
I were someo e t lk"
stop
'
Now
I
B"ll .d . n a mg, ta lk'mg fast, who would never
he ~as gain I t sah1 it :was good, she should get it typed out, and
g O s ow 1t to. somebodY· It was imperative
· . now that
A dah should tell h F
Sh er ranc1s
e renewed her books .
and Dada in the ' tucked th~m all neatly in between Bubu
c!':i~'
~I marched to r~pped V 1clcy' s running nose, and thC)
ut Adah was deep ~n the ool to collect T iti from the nur
in ought th sery.
as ey crossed Haverstock Hill
165

into Prince of Wales Road, pushing the pram with Vicky
trotting by her side, the sun shining in the sky, the day hot and
merry like any day in Africa. People were passing her this way
and that, all in colourful sleeveless summer dresses, one or two
old dears sitting on the benches by the side of the Crescent in front
of the pub smiling, showing their stiff dentures, their crooked
hats pulled down to shade their tired heads from the unusual sun.
She walked into the Crescent where the smell of ripe tomatoes
mingled with the odour from the butcher's. But she saw none of
this, her mind was turning over so fast. Could Peggy and Bill •be
right? Could she be a writer, a real one? Did she not feel totally
fulfilled when she had completed the manuscript, just as ~f it w~
another baby she had had? "I felt so fulfilled when I finished it,
just as if I had just made another baby," she had told Bill, _and ~e
had replied : "But that is how writers feel. Their work 1~ th~r
brainchild. This is your brainchild; you are the only one 10 th!s
whole world who could have produced that particular work, no
one else could. If they tried it would just be an imitation. ~ooks
tell a great deal about the writers. It is like your own particul:C
child."
The phrase kept coming and going through . Adah's mi nd b-.
Brainchild, brainchild. Francis must see it. They might n~er _pu e
lish it, she knew, but she was going to use that as a steppmg :~nld
She had always dreamed of becoming a writer, but she ha ;rst
herself that writers knew so much that before she made fJrbe at
attempt at collecting her knowledge into a book she "."ou at .first
least forty. But now she had done The Bride Price, as a Joke N w ;
but realising that she was serious as she scribbl~d along. d 0
few of her friends had read it and they said that it was goo · ould
She would study harder, then, to be a writer. But where; d to
she start? There was such a lot and such a diverse lot, one a .,,.
' f . Janguai,m-
know to be a writer. Sli.!;. .rn!!!d not write in any A ncan er tongtl.$,.
so it ....~ust be English ~!though English was not_her motl_l; . But she
Yes, it -was the English language she was gomg to us h might
..____.
. D "d before the birth of Christ.
were fourteen generations after av, f th B "ble
She ended up knowing most of the words of that part O de b 1.
by heart. As for Shakespeare, she had never stoppe emg
fascinated by him. It was going to be a lot of v.:ork but it c?uld
done. Then she thought again. It was all nght mast~rmg
language; what of the subject matter? She could not Just keep
writing from memory, just like that, at random. There must be a
purpose, there must be a pattern somewhere. She could not find
the answers to these questions at the time, but she knew they must
be answered before she could write anything publishable. She was
not just going to be a writer of ordinary novels. She would have too
much competition in that line. She would have to specialise some-
how, in some special thing. The only practical knowledge she had
was connected with librarianship. You don' t go about writing about
h?w to file orders or shelve books according to Dewey or the
library of Congress! She could write about the people who came
to borrow books, but she had to know about them. What discipline
teaches people about people? Psychology? Sociology? Anthro-
pol?gy or history? She knew about the others, but what does a
sociologist study? She would ask Francis. He ought to know. She
would let him read the manuscript first then she would ask "Where
do you Iearn about people and what do' they learn in sociology?" '
r S~e told Francis about The Bride Price in the evening. But he
~_hed that he would rather watch The Saint on the new tele-
';;t0?
r which they had hired. Adah pleaded, and wailed at him
it was ~ood, that her friends at the library said so. He should
P ease_ read it. She said that Bill thought it should be typed out be-
cause 1t was good . '
Then F ranci ·d "Y k
to say nJi:h· Of
th" mg
t:
and that·-a u~J / : ' ou _ ecp__!~rgettip.g ~ at_ro~ ~ C, ~"!Oman .
The wfote man can barely tolerate us men,
ramless females like you who could 'think of
no• mg except how to breast-feed her bah ••
'That may be so" ·ed A y.
they say that it • ' ~n dah, :·but people have read it. And
~:O~
you know what i~s
st
(ou ~fd it, I want your opinion. Don't
Francis laughed What us m the future I could be a writer?"

~--
I

not be able to do those long difficult words, but she

to do her own phrases her own way. Adah's phrases,i~ance. The
r:t's
could not write those big long twisting words. Well, s : going
what
.- . ·- ·
man writer m his-own house .
-ever was he · h
. gomg to ear next? A wo-
"Wcll, Flora Nwa a is bl' ma white man's country?
they were going to be. But first she would n~ed gu d the corn· '.'.~l~ra Nwapa wr1tes he:~;d. sh~~ rit~s:::~A~ah ?1allenged.
simplest books she could think of were the Bible an to read by F a~e s~n hc_r books in all th :~ ~gcna, Franas -rejoined
ranas did not reply to th" c I rar1cs where I worked." ·
plete works of Shakespeare. Her Pa had taught ~er ho~ that there 1s. lie was t .

L
the Bible, St Matthew in the Bible, that part which sa• no gomg to read Adah·
167 s
166

~bbish a~d that was that. Adah was hurt badly, but she said noth-
ing. She simply took her notebooks of""rubbish" and placed them
neatly where she kept the books she had borrowed from the library-
tha_t week. She would sa\'e up somehow and buy herself a type-
writer, a second-hand one, one of those sold at the Crescent,
and then she would type it all out. Meanwhile, she would keep
them there and go on reading.
The thought of all this haunted her like a bad dream. That
Francis would not read her book was bad enough but that he had
called it rubbish without doing so was a deeper hurt, and that
he had said that she would never be a writer because she was black
and because she was a woman was like killing her spirit. She felt
empty. What else was there for her to do now? It was plain to her
that Francis could never tolerate an intelligent woman. She blamed
herself again. They ought not to have come, then she would not
have had this urge to write now; her marriage would have b~en
saved at least for the time being because she knew that some time
later ~he was going to write. Librarianship was to her simply a
stepping stone to bring her nearer to the books which she dreamt
she was going to write in the future, when she was forty.
But in England she had been made to start almost twenty years
before her time:- Her books might not be published until she was _
forty but her storv1 had been completed. She could not go back
, • ti · h d the
now. She had known the feeling she had when she ms e
story, she had tasted the fulfilment of seeing others read her work,
and had felt an innez glow that was indescribable when o~~r
people said how much they had enjoyed reading it. Peggy had_sa; ,:
"It was so funny, I could not put it down. It was so comi~a ·
Bill had said, "You only, and nobody else, could have wr~tten
that." Well there was no going back now. She must go forw~r · d
The foll~wing Saturday she left the children with Francis an
11
dashed to the Crescent to do her weekend shopping. They were ~e
sleeping Francis and the children, and she did not bother to wad
them up.' The day was wet. The queues at the C rescen t were en . ·
d · for semo1ma,
less. Adah had to queue for meat, for groun nee, here and
and even okra had to be queued for. She had to st3ndd h was
there, all over the place in the dripping rain. In th e:i7ef :h; her
happy to rush home, all wet but with the sense of _r before the
shopping had all been done very early in the morning
children were awake. the odour of
As she approached their landing she could sme11
168
. . 'ckl h ·ng and praying that
burning paper. She ran ms1de qui y, . opt at Vi
Vicky had not set their room on fire. But ms1d~, she sa~ th cky
and the others were still asleep. It was Francis st_andmg there by
the stove, burning the paper. He saw h~r come m, her ~et face
demanding an explanation. But Francis went on burnmg the
paper. They seldom talked to each other, the two of them. Not
being able to bear the smell any longer, Adah had to speak.
She said, "But, Francis, could you not have thrown all those , 1
papers you are burning into the dustbin, instead of creating this •
awful smell in the room?"
"I was afraid you'd dig them out of the bin. So I had to burn
them," was the prompt reply.
-..., ~dah became curious, suspicious, her heart beating faster.
What are they, Francis? What are you burning? Letters? Who
wrote th~m? Francis, what are you burning?"
Francis did not reply for a while, but went on feeding crumpled
sheets into the st ove an d watch mg · the burnt papers flying life-
1 1
ess Yabout th~ room like black birds. He blocked Adah's view on
purpose with his broad back
hetdWahhknewh th at postu_re ~f Francis's, standing there challenging
· en e turned h f d '
triumphant smil _is ace roun , she knew she had seen that
had seen him \o~. his face before. Now she remembered . She
ful he had be!:'. e k1.7~ that when he was telling her how success-
friend had kept ~~is im,~k a monkey belonging to his friend. The
body. Francis had b h ey a~ a pet, to the annoyance of every-
and given it to th oug tkrat poison, smeared it on a piece of bread
. e mon ey Them k h d d'
•t went through tw· t' : on ey a 1ed, but the agony
f ortunate animal, h 1sd 1ng 1n pai n, th e mournful cry of the un-
told this story to' A~ah never ceas~d to delight Francis. He had
den_ionstrations, that Ad: r:;any times, garnished with gruesome
~ellmg it. There was an eve~ forgot the way he smiled when
ing just like he was doi~~her ter;1ble story he had told Adah smil-C
father had bought for Ch _not w. twas the story of a·goat which h' /--:
yard dF . ns mas Th . 1s
d' an ranc1s had got th st. e goat was tied up in the back- C.
an started to lash th, e rongest horse-whi he
two was. Adah h d •s goat, telling it to tell h.1 p h could find,
whip in a asked him wh m w at two times
tirnettwg sorne animal that could ~ther it did not bother him
his brigh~ was. F~ancis would thenne1t~er talk nor know what tw '
did not rn ;'es glistening behind h' sm,le and smack his littler o
a ter at all, what matter;~ spectacles, and tell her th~i~'
was that the goat Would it
169 not
 answer his questions, so he had to be whipped for it. Adah remem-
bered the whipping she got from her Cousin Vincent, and she
would remember how each stroke went burning into her skin, and
would shudder and tell Francis she did not want to listen to stories
about his "heroic conquests" .
Now Francis had that sickly smile on his face, and Adah guessed
that he was smug with some heroic deed. He picked up the last
sheet, and among the crumpled papers she saw the orange cover
of one of the exercise books in which she had written her story.
Then reality crashed into her mind. Fr~~~is JVas.hurning h.er story;_
he had burned it all. The story that she was basing her dream of
her becoming a writer upon. The story that she was going to show
Titi and Vicky and Bubu and baby Dada when they grew up. She
was going to tell them, she was going to say, "Look, I wrote 0at
when I was a young woman with my own hand and in the English
language." And she was sure they were all going to laugh and
their children were going to laugh too and say, "Oh, Granny, you
are so funny." · One day, Adah was at her wits' end, wondering what she ':"'as
Then she said to Francis her voice small and tired, "Bill~cd
that story my' brainchild. Do you h~te me so·m~ch,..th-a:iyou could-
kill ~y _child? ~~~ause that. is what-you have.done.:.:. • -
.. don't care if it is your child or not. I have read it, ~nd my
family wou ld never be happy if a wife .of. min_e was permitted to
write a book like that." · send for them soon when he was fully settled at home. She had to
"And so you burnt it? "
'"Can't you see that I have?" . When she signed the cheque she gave the landlord he had noticed
That to Adah was the last straw. Francis could kill her child.
She could forgive him all he had done before, but not this ..
She got a new job at the British Museum as a library
officer. Francis gave up his job because he guessed that _Ad~
was now earning a great deal more than she had ever done 10 th
past. But Adah remained adamant to her resolution. Her money
was _for h~rself and _her children. ack
Life with Franos became purgatorial after that. Shew~ b h
into the street ~nee more, surrounded by children just _hke t :
Pied Piper, looking for a house to live in. It took a long time,
she eventually got a two-room flat which she had to share wi
rats and cockroaches. d Francis ignored her but forced hi
Francis would not let her take anything with her: noise and·
lighting was so great that the police had to be called in. ni~anthc
lady apologised to her later, and said, "I am sorry I call
170
. kill ou you k now." The policewomanth
police, but he was gomg t? y Ii ' ish a box of clothes for e
who came ordered Francs to re nqu
children. "th nothing but four babies,.hct.
;~;?; !n~
So Adah walked-to-freedom, .v.:1 . . . h had not sustained
new job and a boic .o f rags. to swollen lips. She
many injuries apart from a ro . en . , artin words were
was treated at the Archway Hosp1_tal. Franc1~ s P d h!r brats, then
that if Adah thought he was commg to s~ er an
he would rather she started thinking of him as a bastart .
Adah was happy about this; she did not want to see im again,
never on this earth. • ed
But things got awful for Adah. A month later, she d1scove:.ee, __
s~ was pregnant again. In fact she had been pregnant ~or th
months, through all those lights, and to cap it all, Francis_ t_raced
their new address through the children. He followed T1tt and
Vicky on their way home from school.
going to do now, when a tap on her window sent her peering
through the glass. It was Francis who, not realising that Adah had
seen him, started to bash on the window as if he were going to
break it. Adah was frightened now. She had lied to the landlord
that her husband had gone home to Nigeria and that he would
speak all this in Yoruba otherwise she would not have got the flat.
the name and had said, "How come a nice girl like you got married
to a YAIMIRIN? " Yaimirin and a;eyon, are the two words the lbos
are known by - it means a race of cannibals . .Adah had told him that
it was a case of childish infatuation. But she silenced him by pay-
ing him six weeks in advance, and by cheque as well. This im-
pressed the man, and bought Adah her freedom for a while.
But now, Francis was bashing at the window and it would be
only a question of time before the landlord and the landlad
would know that her husband was in London and that sh y
Ibo as well. Anger welled up inside her, but she opened the d:o-:as
said that you would never come to see us
for?"
""'°
_The first sentence that came to her mouth Was ... thou h ·
t 1 · g t you
· vv na are you here
.
sensed trouble. Then he said "I mse1f tnto her room. .Adah
People, there is nothing like divot ~ur _count fl'., and among our
-- . e or separation. Once a maii's-
171 ·--
 wi!~'... always ~-man's wife until you die. You cannot escape. You
are6oundtoh1m." - -------- · · nothing of the fact that m d th ch'ldren's vitamin coupons and
A~ah nod~ed but reminded him that, among. their people,....the
husband-provides -for the family and that a wicked man that knock ---::---
ed .~is.wife about ran the risk of losing her altogether. ..........._
My father knocked my mother about untiJ I was old enough
to ~rov.:.stones at him. My ~o~er never left my father:•·- · · •«
~es,_ agreed Adah agam, but .was there ,1,_mont]l !".E~ }'.O)-U
father did_not pay the rent, give food money, pay _for a,!1 }'.Our ,_
school fees? Can you, Francis, show me some vests or an~ ing
hese children can lay their hands ~pon which you ·, an·cl € tf
i ave bought for them? No, Francis, you broke the laws ot_~ ~ -
~- people first, not me. And remember, Francis, I am not your
( !TI!)ther. I am me, and I am different from her. It is a mi~_takcf f~
use your mother as a yardstick. You never loved or respected ~ _i:r.
You simply tolerated her, I know that now, because it f!.ev_~r-.,
crossed your mind to work and send her money like 1Jilier •
Nigerian students do. That should have warned me. In the sh~rt =..-
courting period we had I noticed that you never thought of g,.v-
ing her anything. It was always you, you all the time and s~~• ··
poor soul, was always giving and giving to you. To her nothing "~
is too much, no human is good enough for you. Yo~ remembef ,_
the saying that a man who treated his mother like a shit would al·
ways treat his wife like a shit? That should have warned me, but
I was too blind to see then." ed
What followed is too horrible to print. Adah remember_f '
though, that during the confusion Francis told her he ~ad a.~ ~
He now carried knives with him. She tried several times to-.
for help, but coul? feel the _life being squee~ed out o~ her. St~1. ·
heard people talkmg, bangmg the door w~1ch Franas ~ad usband.--
But the landloid- had .guessed that Francis was A4,?1:i..}. \ - · - af
ancf7 1 ~~st of his people, he didn't want to interft;re ~nti_ ~ ~eng·-·
' - - ol d I ns
. h man
th 1iv1
murder had been committed. It was the door
on the top floor, Devlin was his name, who broke e
open. · e bod}'. had
This could _not go on, Adah told herself _w_l:ien__ 1 ~(iiof ask
gone. sb·e·fiad left Francis over four weeks.be1.o..re,1~:e~- s he li"ad
for any maintenance either for herself or for ~e '!i
at the nursery
to pay almost forty pounds a month tor the chil~~ d Vicky across
and for their dinner money and to a girl to take Ti~;°the·rent, to say
the roaJ . She had to pay almost the same amount
ost of her everyday clothes, th_eir cooking
utensils, even the spoons anll -~ h:m Now he came here adding
the family allowanc~-:'~re_a w1 h d ~used Adah threw caution
this insu~t to all the mJuknes ~;ra~cisc was c~rrying a !cnife ~y,
to the wmd. One never new' · -- - h h d been so
) she told herself-he did use it to threaten her, buts .e. . ! -- -
i bruised and maltreated that she could n~t see herself gomg_tQ._Fork
I for a week or two. No, the law must step m. . .
Then she looked round the room and saw with tears the radio-
t f
gram she had just bought with a little deposit _off the man at the ~
I
Crescent· she saw it had been smashed by Francis. She saw the new
teaset sh~ was paying for from the landlady's catalogue all broken,
the flowery pattern looking pathetical~y dislocated.1:•.fo~_!.he needed
protection against this typ~ of des~ructlon. .
; Adah had never been to a court" before in all her hfe. All she
· wanted was for the magistrate or the judge, or whoever it was, to
,~ ask Francis to stay away from her and her children: She __v:~_not I
J· suing for maintenance, she did not even know if she was entitled
to any. She simply wanted her saJety, -an d ·protection for the chil-
J:!. dren. The wife of the Indian doctor, who was a doctor herself,
and who had treated her, had said: "Next time you might
j not be so lucky with a man who can beat you like this."
She gave her two weeks off work and told her to spend most of it
in bed.
·: Inside the courtroom Adah started to stammer. The doctor had
( told her to call her and that she would come to give evidence. Adah
had thanked her, but did not call her. Suppose they found Francis
guilty of assault which was what they were charging him with?
What then would she gain by it? They might send him to prison,
and what good would that do to her?______ - ----. ----- · •·
She should not have worried because Francis showed another
side to his character .whi~h she h.ad...!!P~ seen b1:fore. All the·bruises
and cuts and bumps Adah had to show the court were the result
of ~alls. Yes, he broke her radiogram because he thought it was a
chau. ~e would ~ay for the repairs. Nobody asked him how he
was going to pay, since he was jobless.
ShAt~ did not know that they would require so many details
e a never r~d La:W or anything to do with Law b
was one of Franas s maJor subjects Adah h t d
day on. Another thing shook her further.
..
f , ut it
a e courts rom that
.,1 1 73
i'
 The magistrate said the children had to be maintained, and She replied that she had.
since Adah-had-always becn the nead .of the family financildly-she It was like Fate intervening. It was like a story one might read
1:,;as given the custody of the ch"ildren. But how much could Fniiici-s- in a true story magazine. This old friend of Adah's paid for the taxi
q'J"ord? _
that took her home from Camden Town because he thought she
"\ . Frll!_l!;is said they had never been married. He th~n ask~ Adah was still with her husband.
, if she could produce the marriage ~ertificate. Adah could not. She
could not even produce her passport and the children'f bi~ c~r:
tificates . Francis had burnt them all. To him, Adah and the kids
ceased to exist. Fr..:-n~i; told. her this in the-court in- low tones in
their own language.
It was then the magistrate knew he was dealing with a very
clever person. He said, "You can say....th__e_...ct>ildri;n_.a.r:e_not..y.o..!!£._
own, but you have to contribute tothcir maintenance. She j_ust can't
do it all on her own."
Francis replied, "I don't mind their being sent for_a_Q<_>pti~ n.'.:.
Something happenea to 1\clah-then: It was like a big hope and
a kind of energy charging into her, giving her so much strength
even !hough she was physically ill with her fifth child. _Then
she said very loud and very clear, " D o<D._ worry, sir. ~ e children
:n:ji:~ that is enqugh. ! sh~,11 ~eve~ ~
She walked out from that court at Clerkenwell a n ~ r e d
anywhere,_not seeing anything, tears flowing from her eyes with-
out stopping, her temperature rising. She never fully recovered
from the Big Fight. She arrived in Camden Town, in front of a
butcher's shop where they sold cheap chickens. She stood there! not
because she was buying any chicken but because she was bred,
hungry but without appetite and feeling like being sick. The
t~~til!..flo~ed. '
Tfien a voice cut through the crowd, called her by her Ibo pet-
name "Nne nna" . The first thought that struck her was that she was
dying, because nobody had called her by that name except people
":'ho knew her_ as a little girl, and only her Pa used to call her
like ~hat, drawmg out every syllable. The voice was very near no~
and •t called again. A man's voice, much too deep to be her Pas
and too gentle to be Francis's.
Then she saw the face of the man. Then she remembered, and
~e remembered . He was a friend she used to know a very, very long
time before, when she was at the Girls' High. His eyes swept down
and s~w ' the ring on her finger and he said : "So you married
FranCJs?'

174