STUDENT NAME

THE Training start date Belt qualification date

EMPOWERMENT
HANDBOOK

By EVE GRACIE www.GracieUniversity.com

DISCLAIMER
Please note that the author and the publisher of this book are NOT RESPONSIBLE in
any manner whatsoever for any injury that may result from practicing the techniques
described within. Since the physical activities described herein may be too strenuous
in nature for some readers to engage in safely, it is essential that a physician be
consulted prior to training.

THE
EMPOWERMENT
HANDBOOK

By Eve Gracie
First published in 2018 by Gracie Global ®
With contributions from Rener Gracie, Victoria Gracie,
© 2018 by Gracie Global, LLC.
Law Enforcement Professionals, Licensed Therapists,
All rights reserved. No part of this publication, or future amendments thereto, may be reproduced or and Survivors of Sexual Assault.
utilized in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including verbal presentation, citations,
reproductions; not limited to and including photocopying, social media reproductions, recording, any
digital media print or likeness or by any information storage and retrieval system, without prior the express
written permission of Gracie Global ®. The contents of this publication, all future amendments herein,
remain the intellectual property of Gracie Global. LLC.

Printed in the U.S.A.

Gracie Global
2440 W. Carson St.
Torrance, CA 90501 – USA

www.GracieUniversity.com
TA B L E O F C O N T E N T S

05 The History of
Women Empowered
by Rener Gracie

07 Introduction 23 Safety Strategies 63 Women Empowered 75 What is the Pink Belt?

by Eve & Victoria Gracie for Healing
27 The Triangle Of Victimization 77 Testing Instructions
09 Before We Begin 65 Lesson Structure
28 Stranger Strategies 79 Evaluation Criteria
66 Recommended Training
31 A Word on Weapons Schedule 80 List of Techniques

32 Non-Stranger Strategies 67 GracieUniversity.com

41 Believing in Boundaries 69 The 20 Lessons

49 Understanding Consent

13 The Definition 50 Victim Blaming

83 Become an Instructor
13 The Numbers 51 College Concerns
86 Continue with
17 If It Happens 54 Domestic Violence Gracie Combatives

19 Resources 59 A Man’s Role 86 Try it for Free

 THE HISTORY OF WOMEN EMPOWERED
by Rener Gracie
M y grandfather, Helio Gracie, had some health concerns as a child. He would
experience unexpected dizziness and vertigo, and was limited in his physical
activities. When Helio was a teenager, his brother, Carlos, introduced him to the art of
Japanese Jiu-Jitsu. He had great difficulty applying the original techniques because they
relied on strength, speed, and coordination that he lacked. So, he modified and adapted
the techniques to accommodate his frail physique. After several years, he had devised
a self-defense system that worked for him. To prove its effectiveness, he challenged and
defeated several opponents, some of whom outweighed him by as much as 100 pounds.
This was the birth of Gracie Jiu-Jitsu.
Through my grandfather’s efforts and those of several other family members, Gracie
Jiu-Jitsu became known as the most effective martial art in Brazil.
In 1978, my father packed his kimono and came to the United States determined to share
our family’s self-defense system with the rest of the world. In 1993, he created a pay-per-view
television spectacle, called the Ultimate Fighting Championship®, to showcase the
effectiveness of the Gracie self-defense system. Within weeks, military, law enforcement,
and martial artists from around the world wanted to learn more about this amazing method
of self- defense. In 1994, the U.S. Army asked our family to develop a program that would
quickly prepare soldiers for hand-to-hand combat. The result was a specialized program
based on Gracie Jiu-Jitsu’s most effective techniques called Gracie Combatives ®.
As a member of this famous fighting family, I was introduced to the art before I could
walk. I taught my first class at age 13 and, by my early 20s, I knew that I would dedicate
the rest of my life to helping others achieve total confidence and ultimate empowerment
through Gracie Jiu-Jitsu.
After over two decades of working with countless military and law enforcement
professionals worldwide, we became aware of the pervasive problem of sexual
assault in America. One study from the early ‘90s reported that 683,000 women are
raped each year, and that one in four women will be sexually assaulted in their lifetime.
That was when we realized Gracie Jiu-Jitsu hadn’t yet served its most meaningful
purpose.
I spent several years studying the circumstances surrounding sexual assaults. Through
correspondence with law enforcement professionals, licensed therapists, and reports
submitted by sexual assault survivors, I discovered that, while the specific details of each
5 6
sexual assault may vary, the general attack strategies are strikingly similar in most
cases. From target selection to the physical techniques used, there were surprising
consistencies in nearly every case I reviewed.
Armed with an in-depth understanding of the most common psychological and physical
attacks used by sexual predators, the Women Empowered program was born. Applying
the principles of Gracie Jiu-Jitsu – leverage, timing, and energy efficiency – my family
developed a series of techniques to counter the most common threat scenarios facing
women.
During my research, I was alarmed to learn that nearly 80% of all sexual assaults
are committed by a non-stranger (someone known to the target) – a classmate,
acquaintance, co-worker, family member, significant other, etc. This made it especially
clear to us that women needed a full range of self-defense options, from situational
awareness, verbal assertiveness, and non-violent de-escalation techniques to
devastating joint locks and deadly force options if the situation calls for it. We are
proud to say Women Empowered is one of the few self-defense programs that includes
a full range of options enabling students to scale their responses to fit the situation.
While we have marginally improved the time-tested techniques over the years, we
achieved a major breakthrough when my wife, Eve, applied a woman’s perspective
to the program. Eve fell in love with jiu-jitsu in her first class, and as soon as she
completed the Women Empowered program for the first time, she knew she found her
niche and committed herself to sharing it with as many women as possible. She
significantly changed the selection of techniques and how we facilitated the course.
As our first female Women Empowered instructor, she has educated and inspired
thousands of women on their way to empowerment through jiu-jitsu!
Today, we teach the Women Empowered program to women of all ages and
athletic abilities, and from all walks of life. We are grateful to have taught this course
to the US Air Force, as well as many academic institutions and corporations seeking to
empower the members of their communities.
From all the women who have discovered their hidden strength to the survivors who
have revived their personal power, we’re proud to say that jiu-jitsu is finally being taught
to those who need it the most.
Rener Gracie
 INTRODUCTION
by Eve & Victoria Gracie
A fter we were both taught jiu-jitsu for the first time, our first thoughts were: why weren’t
we exposed to these invaluable life tools sooner in our lives? And why doesn’t every
woman in the world have jiu-jitsu in her back pocket? As athletes, and women who
always felt we could “hang with the boys,” we still remained starkly aware of the physical
differences between men and women, and the sometimes subtle, yet ever-present
impact these differences had on everyday interactions.
Whether it is a work relationship, romantic relationship, business/client relationship, or
familial relationship, physical intimidation can adversely impact (sometimes subliminally)
our self-confidence and how we interact with others. Once we realized that training
jiu-jitsu actually reduced our vulnerability to intimidation, everything changed. This isn’t
to say that we went around challenging punk men to fights, but that jiu-jitsu changed
our mental framework in a way we never could have anticipated.
What we now know is that our mindset is our most important self-defense tool. Safety is
not just a matter of avoiding physical harm; it also means staying safe from psychological
damage and mistreatment. We had to identify and overcome some deeply held limiting
beliefs in order to reach our full self-defense potential. For each of us, the root of our limit-
ing beliefs can be traced back to specific personal interactions or life experiences.As an
example, think about how many times you have heard these statements in your lifetime:
That’s not very ladylike! You might intimidate men
with that behavior.
You should smile more.
Stop being so uptight.
Be polite and give “so-and-so”
a hug! Relax!
Don’t be so loud. You’re so bossy!
7 8
These limiting statements, and countless others, bombard the lives of women every
single day. They infer that women and girls should be soft-spoken, polite, put others’ needs
before their own, and not express their opinions. While some of these behaviors are
appropriate for certain encounters, when they become our default responses, our safety
is at risk.
We both happen to be ‘people-pleasers’ by nature. For us, the most difficult part of owning
this program was not the physical aspect; it was making the choice to fight our
pre-programmed behaviors and set personal boundaries with others, even when it
meant breaking conventional expectations. We are sometimes misled to believe that
other people’s wants and needs should come before our own, even when it makes us
feel uncomfortable or unsafe. If this mental framework sounds familiar to you, we hope
the Women Empowered program will encourage you to take a deeper look at your
programming, and help you identify any required mental reconditioning to allow you
to overcome your limiting beliefs and, in turn, fully embody the self-defense mindset.
While our goal is to give you the tools necessary to reduce your risk of being targeted
and the confidence to defend yourself if needed, there’s nothing we can do to
completely “prevent” attacks against us. The only people who can prevent violence
against women are the perpetrators of these crimes. In other words,
We don’t learn self-defense because it is our responsibility;
We learn self-defense because violence is a reality.
Yes, this program will turn you into an ass-kicking ninja. What is far more important to us,
however, is that you mentally, emotionally, and physically embody the belief that you
are worth defending. By embarking on this program, you are investing in yourself and
your safety. It’s time to release those limiting beliefs, and remember that you deserve to
defend yourself, both physically and emotionally. You are worth it.
Eve & Victoria Gracie
BEFORE WE BEGIN
S exual assault is never the fault of the survivor. As women, we
cannot “prevent” sexual assault; the word “prevention” implies that
we have an active role or a choice in the act. We can, however, reduce
our risk through education, awareness, and physical self-defense.
We will cover all of these components in the Women Empowered
program.
Throughout this program and in this manual, we will refer to the
assailant as “he” or “him,” and the target as “she” or “her.” This is not to
say that an assailant cannot be a woman, and that a target cannot
be a man. These terms were chosen to simplify the instruction
terminology to reflect the majority of cases of sexual assault, which
are committed by a man against a woman (91%) (23).
T he techniques and safety principles of this program are not gender
exclusive, can be applied by all genders, and will work on all genders.
The contents of this program and handbook are also meant to
support members of the LGBTQ communities.
9 10
There is no “right” and “wrong” in self-defense. If you have ever
experienced sexual assault in the past, and did anything other
than what we present in this program, you did not do anything
“wrong.” In fact, you did everything you needed to do to survive with
the tools you had, and that’s all that matters. Our goal with this
program is to add more tools to your arsenal so that you have
more options to choose from should the need arise. If, in the
future, you find ourself in a situation similar to those we explore in this
program and do not use the tools we teach you, you still will have
done nothing wrong. Every situation is unique, and anything you
have to do to survive is right by us.
While learning self-defense can be an extremely empowering
experience, for survivors of assault it can also bring up painful or
overwhelming emotions. Due to the nature of the content of the
Women Empowered program and this survival manual, it is possible
that some participants may experience mental, emotional, or
physical triggers. For more information on triggering, and some tools
to help you manage triggers, please see the Women Empowered
for Healing section. (page 63)
 1
“
I learn

S E C T I O N

not because it is my

”
but because it is my

– Eve Gracie
 THE EMPOWERMENT HANDBOOK
THE DEFINITION
Unfortunately, sexual assault is a commonly misunderstood problem. Before we discuss
the tips, strategies, and techniques that will help keep you safe in our unpredictable
world, we need to define sexual assault, review the statistics, and review the immediate
actions you should take if you or someone you know is sexually assaulted.
THE NATIONAL CENTER FOR VICTIMS OF CRIME DEFINES SEXUAL ASSAULT AS FOLLOWS:
Sexual assault takes many forms including attacks such as rape or attempted rape, as
well as any unwanted sexual contact or verbal threats. Usually a sexual assault occurs
when someone touches any part of another person’s body in a sexual way, even through
clothes, without that person’s consent. Some types of sexual acts which fall under the
category of sexual assault include forced sexual intercourse (rape), sodomy (oral or
anal sexual acts), child molestation, incest, fondling, and attempted rape. Sexual assault
in any form is often a devastating crime. Assailants can be strangers, acquaintances,
friends, or family members. Assailants commit sexual assault by way of violence, threats,
coercion, manipulation, pressure, or tricks.
THE NUMBERS
How often do sexual assaults take place?
Every 98 seconds, another American is sexually assaulted. (20)
321,500 Americans age 12 and older are sexually assaulted or raped each year. (20)
1 in 4 college women report surviving rape (15%) or attempted rape (12%) since
their fourteenth birthday. (1)
A survey of female high school students found that 1 out of 5 girls had experienced
forced sex (rape). Half of these girls told no one about the incident. (3)
Among developmentally disabled adult females, as many as 83% are victims of
sexual assault. (17)
The National Violence Against Women Survey found that rape is a crime committed self-protective action during the crime. (5)
primarily against youth. Of the women who reported being raped sometime in their
lives, 21.6% were younger than age 12, 32.4% were ages 12 to 17, 29% were ages 18
to 24, and 16.6% were over 25 years old. Thus, 54% of women victims were under age
18 at the time of the first rape and 83% were under the age of 25. (18)
18,900 military members experience unwanted sexual contact each year. (21)
13
OUR REALITY
Who are the perpetrators?
According to the National Crime Victimization Survey conducted by the U.S.
Department of Justice in 2009, 78% of sexual assaults were committed by
non-strangers (friend, acquaintance, intimate partners, or relatives); strangers
committed only 22%.
60% of men who rape are Caucasian. (5)
8% of men admit committing acts that meet the legal definition of rape or attempted
rape. Of these men who committed rape, 84% said that what they did was definitely
not rape. (1)
More than 1 in 5 men report “becoming so sexually aroused that they could not stop
themselves from having sex, even though the woman did not consent.” (6)
35% of men report at least some degree of likelihood of raping if they could be
assured they wouldn’t be caught or punished. (7)
Sexual assault offenders were substantially more likely than any other category of
violent criminal to report experiencing physical or sexual abuse as children. (5)
Nearly 1 in 4 women may experience sexual violence by an intimate partner in their
lifetime. (11)
In a study of elder female sexual abuse victims 81% of the abuse was perpetrated
by the victim’s primary caregiver, and 78% by family members, of which 39% were
sons. (12)
What are the circumstances?
57% of rapes happen on dates. (1)
75% of the men and 55% of the women involved in non-stranger rapes were drinking
or taking drugs just before the attack. (1)
About 70% of sexual assault survivors reported that they took some form of
55% of gang rapes on college campuses are committed by fraternities, 40% by
sports teams, and 5% by others. (8)
More than half of all rape and sexual assault incidents occur within one mile of the
survivor’s home or in her home. (5)
In 29% of rapes, the offender uses a weapon. (15)
14
 THE EMPOWERMENT HANDBOOK
Sexual Assault in the LGBTQ community
According to the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention (CDC), lesbian, gay,
and bisexual people experience sexual violence at similar or higher rates than
heterosexuals. (25).
Studies suggest that around half of transgender people and bisexual women will
experience sexual violence at some point in their lifetimes. (25).
44 percent of lesbians and 61 percent of bisexual women experience rape, physical
violence, or stalking by an intimate partner. (25).
46 percent of bisexual women have been raped, compared to 17 percent of hetero-
sexual women and 13 percent of lesbians. (25).
40 percent of gay men and 47 percent of bisexual men have experienced sexual
violence other than rape, compared to 21 percent of heterosexual men. (25)
47% of transgender people are sexually assaulted at some point in their lifetime. (26).
Among people of color, American Indian (65%), multiracial (59%), Middle Eastern
(58%), and Black (53%) respondents of the 2015 U.S. Transgender Survey were most
likely to have been sexually assaulted in their lifetime. (26).
Nearly half (48 percent) of bisexual women who are rape survivors experienced their
first rape between ages 11 and 17. (25).
15
OUR REALITY
What happens after the sexual assault?
The National Crime Victimization Survey has reported that approximately 30% of rape
survivors over the last 10 years reported the incident to the police. (2)
Of those rapes reported to the police, only 16% result in prison sentences. Therefore,
approximately 5% of the time, a man who rapes ends up in prison; 95% of the time
he does not. (2)
30% of rape survivors contemplate suicide after the rape. (1)
82% of rape survivors say the rape permanently changed them. (1)
The adult pregnancy rate associated with rape is estimated to be 4.7%. (9)
Each year, an estimated 25,000 American women will become pregnant following
an act of sexual violence. (13)
There is at least a 50% likelihood that a woman will develop Post Traumatic Stress
Disorder (PTSD) after being raped. Sexual assault is also closely associated with
depression and anxiety disorders. (14)
In a survey of victims who did not report rape or attempted rape to the police, 43%
thought nothing could be done, 27% felt it was a private matter, 12% were afraid
of police response, and 12% felt the assault was not important enough to report. (16)
Rape survivors who had the assistance of an advocate were significantly more likely
to have police reports taken and were less likely to be treated negatively by police
officers. These women also reported that they experienced less distress after their
contact with the legal system. (19)
16
 THE EMPOWERMENT HANDBOOK OUR REALITY

IF IT HAPPENS
If you are sexually assaulted, it is critically important you understand that, no matter what While we appreciate the extreme difficultly of recounting a personal assault, this detailed
you did, where you were, what time of day it was, or what you were wearing, the assault documentation not only helps to identify and prosecute the assailant, but can also
was in no way your fault. Sexual assault has little or nothing to do with passion, lust, or restore a survivor’s control and confidence by providing an active role in the investigation
sexual arousal; it is primarily based on the perpetrator’s need to control, dominate, abuse, and trial.
and humiliate. If someone discloses to you that they have been sexually assaulted,
here are some things you can do to help:
Survivors of sexual assault react in many different ways following assault. Reactions
can range from shock, rage, unfounded feelings of guilt or shame, numbness, or fear of Listen without judgement Encourage the survivor to
embarrassment. Some survivors are unable to recall the exact accounts that took place. seek medical attention
The first step is to make sure you are in a safe place or move to a place where you feel safer. Believe them
Consider the possibility of calling a friend, relative, partner, the police, or an advocate Keep their disclosure confidential
Assure them the assault
(unless the situation requires
specifically trained in assisting survivors of sexual assault. Specially trained advocates was not their fault mandatory reporting)
can give critical information and advice, and everything you share remains confidential.
Let them know they did what Never pressure them for
The decision to report a sexual assault is yours. If you intend to report the was necessary to survive more information than they
assault to law enforcement, attempt to preserve as much evidence as possible.
Do not offer physical touch want to share
Do not:
(hugs, etc.) unless they initiate it
Encourage the survivor to
Shower, bathe, or douche Brush your teeth or gargle or you ask permission first
talk about the assault with
Reassure the survivor that they an advocate, mental health
Throw away any clothes that Put on makeup
are cared for and loved professional, or someone they
were worn at the time of the assault
Clean or straighten up trust, and let them know they
Brush or comb your hair the crime scene do not have to manage this
crisis alone
Use the restroom Eat or drink anything

If possible, you should immediately record everything you can remember We are fully aware of the realities facing the victims of personal attacks and encourage
about the incident, including: all survivors to counter negative, self-blaming thoughts. It is our privilege to work to
support survivors. There are major societal and academic advances in research on how
Physical description Details of sexual activity best to support survivors of personal attacks. More than anything, we encourage survivors
(e.g., height, weight, hair color, to seek the emotional and legal support they need after an assault. If the survivor is
Time & location(s) of the incident
clothes, scars, tattoos) unsure of where to seek this support, please refer to the resources on the next page.
Implements used prior to or
Statements, voice characteristics
during the assault and method
Evidence of intoxication or drug use of approach (i.e. -”Excuse me,
can I use your phone)
Description of weapons

17 18
 THE EMPOWERMENT HANDBOOK

RESOURCES
RAINN - Rape, Abuse, and Incest National Network
National Sexual Assault Hotline
1 (800) 656-HOPE (4613)
www.rainn.org
National Sexual Violence Resource Center (NSVRC)
The NSVRC connects people with information, tools and expertise needed to address
and prevent sexual violence. It also maintains an extensive library and virtual information
bank of statistics, research, information and speakers on a variety of relevant topics.
1 (877) 739-3895
www.nsvrc.org
The Anti-Violence Project – Serves LGBTQ community
Hotline: 212-714-1124
www.AVP.org

Legal Help:
SurvJustice
This Washington DC based organization provides legal assistance to survivors who
need representation at campus hearings, help securing safety measures and other
accommodations, along with help filing administrative complaints.
www.Survjustic.org/survivors/

Victim Rights Law Center

A non-profit law center dedicated to serving the needs of rape and sexual assault
victims. It offers free legal services to victims of rape and sexual assault throughout
Massachusetts and Multinomah and Washington County in Oregon, along with training
to attorneys and advocates nationally.
www.Victimrights.org

Domestic Violence
The National Domestic Violence Hotline
1−800−799−7233
thehotline.org

19 20
S E C T I O N

2 “
The most common way

is by
give up

they don’t have any

– Alice Walker
 THE EMPOWERMENT HANDBOOK O U R TO O L S

SAFETY STRATEGIES The Basics

Now that we’ve identified the threats, let’s explore our options. In this section, we will review
personal safety strategies. Then, we will dissect the most common tactics used by sexual
predators – both strangers and non-strangers – to ensure we are always one step ahead.
It is important to remember that sexual assault cannot be prevented by the victim. We
play no role in a perpetrator’s decision to carry out an assault. We can, however, reduce
our risk through awareness, better understanding of the perpetrator’s objectives, and
enhanced confidence to defend against attempted assaults.
In the twenty lessons of the Women Empowered program we teach you a series of simple,
highly effective self-defense techniques for use during an assault. However, “self-defense”
begins long before the attack gets physical. Your first and most important line of defense is
a heightened sense of awareness – awareness of yourself, awareness of your surroundings,
and awareness of the assailant’s strategies.
The element of surprise is a criminal’s greatest advantage. Sexual predators, in particular,
are known for targeting women in circumstances where bystanders are less likely to
intervene and the target appears to be unaware of the threat. By simply being attuned
to your surroundings and “walking strong,” you can convey that you are not a potential
assailant’s “ideal” target. The following awareness principles and safety tips can help you
avoid the fight before it starts. But remember, while these specific suggestions are useful,
the underlying mindset is even more useful. If you understand the Empowered Mindset,
you will naturally behave in ways that minimize your risk of assault.
Anytime you are in an isolated area – on the street, in an office building or shopping
mall, driving, waiting for a bus or subway – stay alert and attuned to your surroundings.
Use confident body posture and direct facial expressions to send the message
that you’re calm, confident, and know where you’re going.
Trust your instincts. If something or someone makes you uneasy, avoid the person
or leave.
Know the neighborhoods where you live and work. Check out the locations of police
and fire stations, hospitals, and restaurants or stores that are open late.
At Home
Make sure you have your key out as you approach your door and remain aware of
anyone suspicious within close proximity.
Make sure your entrance area is well lit.
If you live in an apartment or dormitory, don’t be polite and hold the lobby door open
for a stranger who has been waiting.
List only your last name and first initial on your mailbox.
Keep your doors and windows locked when not in use.
Invest in a security alarm system for your home or place of residence.

The Empowered Mindset is defined by your commitment to protecting yourself by staying

alert and aware of your surroundings, taking reasonable precautions against realistic risks,
trusting your instincts, and being willing to act on those instincts when necessary. Just
as with the physical techniques, actual practice is necessary to develop and maintain
the mindset. As you read the following list of safety strategies, keep in mind that these
are suggestions and that, ultimately, you will make your own decisions based on your
assessment of a situation. Later, you’ll have a chance to analyze these safety strategies in
the context of the Triangle of Victimization.

23 24
 THE EMPOWERMENT HANDBOOK

On The Town
Have your key or key fob ready as you approach your car. Upon entering, check the
inside of your car and lock your doors as soon as possible.
Do not accept drinks from anyone if you did not see them prepared.

Avoid leaving your drink unattended for any period of time.

When by yourself, or with someone you just met, inform a family member or friend of
your whereabouts.
When entering a bar or club, know where emergency exits are located in case of a
fire or other emergencies.
Be familiar with your surroundings (street names, landmarks, etc.). This specific
information will be needed to locate you in case of emergency.
Do not drink and drive or accept a ride from anyone who has been drinking or using
illicit substances. Designate a driver who will not drink or use drugs, or arrange Social Media Safety
alternate transportation.
Remember that while all of your friends may be followers, not all of your followers are
Avoid leaving your personal belongings unattended. your friends.
Arrange a buddy system with a friend and always watch after each other. When posting on social media, try to avoid revealing to your followers when you are
Carry a cell phone. Don’t hesitate to call 911 if you are being harassed or feel unsafe. home alone or at any location you frequent alone. It’s best to postpone your posts
so that your patterns cannot be identified.
Always carry enough money for
a taxi, or have a ride-sharing app Be careful not to post your address or any clear landmarks that can be used to
identify where you live.
prepared on your phone.
When using any ride sharing Do not tag your specific location when you are alone.
apps such as Uber or Lyft, Turn off your phone’s geotagging feature so your photos are not tagged with a
always make sure your driver specific location. You can usually configure this under ‘Settings’ on your cell phone.
matches the description on the
Try to avoid scrolling or reading through social media posts when you are in public,
app. When riding alone, share
isolated areas or feel unsafe.
your route with a friend or family
member. If you don’t feel
REVIEW THESE SAFETY STRATEGY TIPS OFTEN AND SHARE THEM WITH YOUR FRIENDS.
comfortable with the driver,
don’t have them drop you off While most of these tips may seem like common sense, they are not necessarily common
directly in front of your home, practice. Following these strategies will dramatically reduce your vulnerability to attack by
especially if you live alone. increasing your awareness and sending powerful messages to any would-be assailants.

25 26
 THE EMPOWERMENT HANDBOOK O U R TO O L S

THE TRIANGLE OF VICTIMIZATION

The Triangle of Victimization (Figure 1) graphically summarizes the vital role that The predator is an independent variable, so you can only influence the Triangle by
heightened awareness plays in your personal safety. making yourself less of an “ideal” target by remaining vigilant, particularly when the
chance of bystander intervention is low. Although a sexual assault can occur under
Figure 1 many circumstances, studies show that the five most likely locations are:
OPPORTUNITY
1. At or near the victim’s home (55%) 4. In an enclosed but public area,
such as a parking lot or garage (10%)
2. In an open public place (15%)
5. School property or college
3. At or near a relative’s home (12%)
campuses (8%) (20)

TRIANGLE We realize you cannot avoid all of these locations, and you cannot remain 100% aware of
OF
your surroundings at all times. Sometimes women have to answer an important call, send
VICTIMIZATION
off an email, or have other everyday distractions while out and about. The key is to train
yourself to recognize when the opportunity for an assault is at its highest, which is inversely
PREDATOR TARGET correlated to the potential for bystander intervention. When the opportunities against us
are most likely, we must rely on our vigilance to stay one step ahead. Sexual predators
are highly opportunistic offenders, so any effort spent avoiding the Triangle of Victimization
The Triangle depicts the three components that must exist in order for a sexual assault is effort well spent.
to occur: a predator, a target, and an opportunity. Let’s first define what an opportunity
usually looks like. Predators are looking to carry out this crime without being detected STRANGER STRATEGIES (Unknown Assailant)
or caught, which means their top consideration when selecting a target is the likelihood
There are two types of sexual predators: strangers and non-strangers. While both types
that someone else might intervene in the attack. Consequently, as the potential for
of predators have a common objective, they employ different strategies. In this section,
bystander intervention decreases, the likelihood of an assault increases. The
we will discuss the four-phase attack strategy most commonly used by strangers as well
likelihood of bystander intervention does not only depend on the number of people
as the defensive tactics that would apply in each phase. We’ll teach you how to defend
around, it may also depend on the bystanders in question, or the ability for the bystanders
against non-strangers, or known assailants, in the next section.
to detect someone in distress. For example, a concert is extremely loud with large crowds
of people, and it may be hard for a bystander to detect that someone needs assistance.
Sexual assault studies and survivor reports indicate that nearly all stranger-related
assaults follow the same four-phase strategy:
If one of the three components of the Triangle of Victimization does not exist, the sexual
assault cannot take place. For example, you could be at your local grocery store standing
right next to a predator, but he will likely not sexually assault you because you are in a 1. Identify an unsuspecting target 3. Control and exhaust the target
well-lit store surrounded by people who would intervene. In other words, there is a predator, 2. Subdue and isolate the target 4. Execute the assault
a potential target, but no opportunity, so the Triangle is incomplete. If, however, you leave
the grocery store and venture into a desolate parking lot without an escort, the Triangle
will be complete and the predator will have the opportunity to carry out the assault.

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PHASE 1: Identify an Unsuspecting Target
Assaults by strangers rely heavily on the element of surprise. This requires that they
approach their target undetected, or under the guise of a well-intentioned person.
Consequently, an ideal target may be someone who appears distracted, inattentive,
or timid. Perpetrators also tend to select locations that enable them to strike quickly
and with the lowest chance of bystander intervention. Phase 1 ends when the
predator has selected his target.
Phase 1 Survival Strategies
The most important Phase 1 defensive strategy is heightened awareness. Being
mindful of the Safety Strategies and understanding the Triangle of Victimization
will reduce your vulnerability by limiting opportunities for the predator to catch you
off guard. Develop the habit of scanning your surroundings, making direct eye
contact with the people around you, and maintaining an alert and confident
posture. Oftentimes the perpetrator will attempt to “test the waters” by pretending
to be a well-intentioned civilian with “courteous” gestures, like offering to help with a
heavy load of bags, or initiate normal conversations, such as by asking where you
got your shoes. The key to addressing these is to trust your instincts above everything
else. If you feel in anyway uncomfortable, communicate it verbally, establish a
physical boundary (Lesson 10), and avoid getting close to them. These practices
will project a confidence and readiness that will help deter potential attackers
seeking vulnerable targets.
PHASE 2: Subdue and Isolate the Target
Once within close range, the predator will seek to subdue the target. Phase 2 begins
once the target identifies the perpetrator as a threat. The nature and severity of
the threat can range from coercive language to physical assault. Sometimes, the
predator will verbally threaten or grab the target to gauge resistance. More often, a
stranger will attempt to overwhelm the target with tremendous force, and then move
the victim to a secluded site. Phase 2 ends once the predator gains full control and
forces the target into isolation and onto the ground or another surface.
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Phase 2 Survival Strategies
Phase 2 survival encompasses all efforts and action that thwarts the sexual predator
from gaining physical control. In the Women Empowered program, we teach you how
to escape the most common physical attacks, as well as how to employ verbal
strategies to establish boundaries prior to physical contact. If the predator gains
control of you, attempt to remain on your feet and avoid abduction at all costs.
Causing as much chaos as possible by yelling loudly and screaming for help will
increase the possibility of a bystander intervening. Even if a bystander does not
intervene, the perpetrator’s fear of being detected may cause him to flee the scene
before carrying out his plans. If the predator can’t get you to the ground or remove
you from public view, he cannot advance to Phase 3.
PHASE 3: Control and Exhaust the Target
Phase 3 begins after the predator has subdued and isolated the target. The predator
will attempt to physically and psychologically “break” the target’s will to resist by
pinning her to the ground and/or striking her. In Phase 3, the predator expects the
woman to panic and fight wildly to escape. This behavior hastens the woman’s
exhaustion, and it feeds the predator’s need to control and dominate the target.
He knows that a demoralized and exhausted target will more easily succumb to
the sexual assault. Phase 3 ends when the predator believes that the target has
mentally and physically surrendered.
Phase 3 Survival Strategies
In Phase 3, your primary objective is to escape and flee. This is where most other
women’s self-defense programs mistakenly teach their students to fight wildly, thrash
about, and strike at their captor. We recommend these explosive responses in
Phase 2, as they can be highly effective when the predator is trying to subdue you.
However, once the predator has pinned you to the ground in Phase 3, this type of
behavior is extremely risky as it quickly depletes your energy and drains your will and
ability to fight. The keys to survival in this phase are to avoid panic, conserve energy
using the Punch Block Series (Lesson 7), and escape using a leverage-based
technique when the opportunity arises. This is obviously much easier said than
done. In order to remain calm and identify the escape opportunities in these
worst-case scenarios, routine self-defense training is imperative. Although there
are dozens of women’s self-defense courses that provide sound survival strategies
for Phase 1 and Phase 2, the Women Empowered program stands alone in
its ability to empower women with the physical tools and mindset needed
to effectively overcome the unique challenges of Phase 3.
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A WORD ON WEAPONS
In most of the United States, first-degree rape carries a minimum sentence of 3-5 years.
If the assailant uses a deadly weapon (knife, gun, etc.) during the assault, the minimum
sentence jumps to 15-20 years with a maximum sentence of life imprisonment or the
death penalty. This helps explain why deadly weapons are used in only 29% of sexual
assaults (according to a study conducted by the U.S. Department of Justice). Statistically
speaking, if you are sexually assaulted, the attacker likely won’t have a weapon. If he
does, here are a few critical points to keep in mind:
If the assailant is robbing you for a material object such as your purse, phone,
jewelry, or car, give it to him. No material object is worth risking your life.
If you are in a public place and a predator uses a weapon to intimidate you into
abduction, do everything in your power to not go along with his plan. If he’s willing to
kill you in public, then he’s certainly willing to kill you in isolation.
If you have been isolated against your will and are under his control, feign compliance
until a clear escape opportunity presents itself and then make your move.
If escape is not an option, try to convince the attacker that he doesn’t need the
weapon and that you will cooperate. If he puts the weapon down, any techniques
or escapes used will be much safer.
If all else fails, you can use the Women Empowered weapon defense techniques
(Lesson 18) to neutralize the threat. Be sure to execute the technique with total
conviction because your life depends on it.
Once you execute the appropriate technique and gain control of the weapon, do
whatever it takes to ensure the assailant does not regain control of the weapon or
of you. Whoever is most committed to hurting the other person will be victorious.
Let it be you.
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PHASE 4: Execute the Assault
Phase 4 begins when the target has surrendered and the predator attempts to
carry out the sexual assault, and ends with the completion of the crime. During this
phase, the assailant will rely on the target’s exhaustion, demoralization, and fear to
maintain control.
Phase 4 Survival Strategies
If unable to escape during Phase 3, a “false surrender” signaling that you cannot or
will no longer resist may create a new opportunity for escape. Use verbal and physical
cues to convince your attacker you will cooperate with phrases such as, “I give up,”
“Please don’t hurt me,” and, “I’ll do whatever you want.” Only when the assailant
believes you will cooperate will he shift from physically restraining you and transition
into the Phase 4 assault. When this happens, you will have an opportunity to apply
several Women Empowered techniques to escape or incapacitate the predator.
Feigning surrender can be very difficult. In fact, it requires the same diligent practice
as all the physical techniques presented in the Women Empowered program.
THE BOTTOM LINE
Your ability to adjust your survival strategy to match each phase of the assault is vitally
important. Note that the mindset and the physical techniques change drastically in
each phase, and failure to adapt may cause your actions to be ineffective or even
counterproductive. Use your Safety Strategies to heighten awareness and reduce the
risks of being targeted, but perfect the techniques and master the principles presented
in the Women Empowered program to ensure that you have a realistic and reliable
action plan if a physical assault is unavoidable.
NON–STRANGER STRATEGIES (Familiar Assailant)
According to a National Crime Victimization Survey conducted by the U.S. Department of
Justice in 2009, non-strangers committed more than 78% of all reported sexual assaults.
Put simply, people who are familiar to the target (friends, acquaintances, classmates,
colleagues, relatives, etc.) conduct 4 out of 5 sexual assaults. While the objective is the
same as that in a stranger-related assault, the methods used by non-strangers are very
different, especially during the first three phases. The strategy is more insidious and is
usually in play over a longer period of time. The four phases are:
1. Intrusion 2. Desensitization 3. Isolation 4. Execute the Assault
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PHASE 1: Intrusion
Non-stranger assailants take advantage of their existing relationships with potential
targets and initially attempt to appear non-threatening. Their objective is to find
targets who they believe will be more susceptible to the predator’s influence,
or otherwise unlikely to resist their advances. Once the target has been identified,
the assailant will begin by probing the target’s boundaries by testing tolerance for
inappropriate behavior. The intrusion will include everything from suggestive
sexual comments and questions to inappropriate physical contact. Often, the
influence of drugs or alcohol will contribute to both the predator’s boldness and
the target’s willingness to endure the behavior. Phase 1 ends once the predator
believes that the target accepts the initial intrusive behaviors.
Phase 1 Survival Strategies
The most important Phase 1 survival strategy is to establish strong, confident
boundaries. In order to do this, you must first know your metaphorical and physical
boundaries. How much interaction are you interested in? How much personal
space do you need? How much physical contact is OK? The answers will likely vary
depending on the social circumstances. At all times, however, you have the right to
assert yourself and express your disapproval if the predator says or does something
you feel is inappropriate.You may use verbal or physical tools to establish boundaries
with others, and we will discuss boundary-setting tools in the following sections. The
most difficult part of Phase 1 survival is identifying whether the person in question is
a potential threat to you or not. The easiest way to confirm their intentions is by
assessing their response to an established boundary. If they refuse to acknowledge
or accept your desired boundary, it is a clear indicator of their lack of respect for
your personal comfort and safety. The predator will often attempt to make you feel
guilty for “making a big deal out of nothing,” but stand your ground. If the behavior
makes you feel uncomfortable, then it’s inappropriate. If it’s inappropriate, it should
stop. Bottom line: A well-meaning person will not insist on making you uncomfortable
or make you feel embarrassed for feeling uncomfortable.
PHASE 2: Desensitization
Phase 2 begins with repeated verbal, physical, or psychological intrusions on personal
boundaries in those areas where the predator found exploitable vulnerabilities. This
process – which may last a single evening or several months – desensitizes the
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target and emboldens the predator. Once the original intrusive behaviors become
commonplace in the relationship, the predator will gradually introduce new, more
intrusive behaviors along with control tactics to further desensitize the target, thus
creating a level of intimacy that would not exist in a healthy relationship. It is
important to note that drugs and alcohol are one of the commonly used methods
of desensitization. Phase 2 ends when the predator believes the target is sufficiently
desensitized to maneuver to an isolated site without suspicion or resistance.
Phase 2 Survival Strategies
Because someone you know commits this type of sexual assault, it is easy to dismiss
or forgive the initial intrusive behaviors under the assumption that the person would
not harm you. The key to Phase 2 survival is to understand that even though you may
have initially overlooked or even invited the predator’s initial inappropriate gestures,
you are under no obligation to continue to accept the behavior. As soon as you
feel uncomfortable or detect bad intentions, express your concerns, define your
boundaries, and end it. For most people, the greatest challenge in this phase is
openly expressing concerns about previously tolerated behaviors. When your safety
and well-being are at stake, however, you can’t afford to be concerned with anyone
else’s feelings or public image, including your own. The longer the inappropriate
behavior continues, the more desensitized and vulnerable you will become. Anyone
who truly respects us and deserves our love or affection will be understanding of
any boundaries we set with them. It is important that, once we identify any attempt
to desensitize or control us, we effectively communicate our desire for the behavior
to end.
PHASE 3: Isolation
In Phase 3, the predator will typically attempt to isolate the target to reduce the
likelihood of intervention or interference with the planned assault. Isolation also
ensures that no one witnesses the predator’s actions. He will generally not need to
physically force her into isolation, but rather, will rely on the false sense of trust he
has created with the target. In some cases, the power dynamic is such that the
perpetrator may not seek isolation, and attempt to carry out the assault in plain
sight under the assumption that the target will not resist and/or that others present
will not intervene. Phase 3 ends when the predator has isolated the target.
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Phase 3 Survival Strategies
The key to Phase 3 survival is to avoid being isolated with anyone you suspect might
have malicious intentions. Trust your instincts! Be aware that non-strangers are
extremely manipulative and will say or do anything to build a false sense of trust.
Note that a sexual predator may skip Phases 1 and 2 if the opportunity for isolation
exists. They may also accomplish isolation before embarking on phases 1 and 2.
If isolated with a suspicious individual, return to a populated area as quickly
as possible. If the predator attempts to detain you, use your Women Empowered
self-defense techniques to defend yourself and escape.
PHASE 4: Execute the Assault
In Phase 4, the predator will leverage the false intimacy of the relationship to disguise
his intentions and execute the planned sexual assault. Because the target may have
tolerated inappropriate sexual comments or touching, the predator will insinuate
that the proposed sexual advances are the natural progression of the relationship.
If the target resists, the predator may use verbal strategies to coerce her into
remaining - he might, for example, make the target feel guilty for “leading him
on.” The level of violence used to execute the sexual assault will usually vary and
is often just enough physical force to discourage resistance from the target. At
this point, the attack may begin to mirror that of a stranger-related assault as
described in Phases 2, 3, and 4 of the previous section.
Phase 4 Attack Strategies
The bottom line is that, regardless of what behavior was tolerated up until this point,
it is never too late to establish and enforce a boundary! You are never obligated to
engage in sexual activity with anyone, including people you are casually dating,
boyfriends, and husbands. This belief is the core of Phase 4 survival. If forced to
engage in sexual activity, then you have every right to resist, regardless of the nature
of your relationship. If the predator pins or traps you, then the survival strategy mirrors
that of a stranger-related sexual assault. Use your Women Empowered self-defense
techniques to neutralize the threat, or escape from or incapacitate your assailant.
When you decide to act, do so with confidence and conviction to ensure your safety.
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Instrumental Violence vs. Gratuitous Violence
In order to disguise their intentions, non-stranger sexual predators use “instrumental
violence,” or a level of violence that is proportionate to the level of resistance. Strangers,
in contrast, often use “gratuitous violence” or “extreme violence.” Alcohol is the weapon
of choice for non-stranger sexual predators, as it impairs the target’s judgment, weakens
defense mechanisms, and facilitates the assault. A survivor of an assault is often made
to believe that if she did not get violently attacked then she was not a victim of sexual
assault. This is grossly false. Violence comes in many forms, some more recognizable
than others, but we should feel empowered to defend against all of them.
The Undercover Sexual Predator
The non-stranger, or known, assailant is often an “undercover” sexual predator. A
non-stranger’s attack strategy differs greatly from a stranger’s, but is just as malicious,
just as harmful, and just as punishable. One of the reasons why sexual assault is such an
underreported crime is because non-strangers perpetrate most assaults. And, sadly, in
many such cases, the survivor doesn’t realize that a sexual assault occurred. In addition
to being confused on what occurred, the survivor may fear the social repercussions of
reporting someone that may be trusted amongst their community or peers.
Although stranger-related sexual assaults are far less likely than non-stranger assaults, they
receive far more media attention. Stranger-related sexual assaults garner more public
attention and outcry due to their intrusive and alarming effects on societal perceptions
or expectations of public safety. When a person is sexually assaulted in a way that does
not fit the media-driven stereotypical mold of stranger-related sexual assault, they may
question whether or not what happened constitutes sexual assault. “We were both a
little drunk and got carried away.” “One thing just led to another and I didn’t know how
to say ‘no.’” If consent was not fully and freely given (and it cannot be if the person is
incapacitated by drugs or alcohol), it is sexual assault – and may be rape.
To illustrate this point, imagine that a stranger and a non-stranger sought to poison you.
The stranger would likely wait in hiding, then strike with suddenness and inject you with
the poison. On the other hand, the non-stranger’s approach might entail an enjoyable
dinner date and friendly discussion over a bottle of wine. When you excuse yourself to
visit the restroom, the predator swiftly pours an odorless, colorless poison into your drink.
The methods differ, but the crime is the same.
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Even though non-stranger sexual assaults, such as date rape, do not fit the conventional
view of a violent sexual assault, they are just as condemnable as anything you might see
on the news. Non-stranger assaults can be far more psychologically damaging because
the assaults occur in perceived “safe” places with perceived “safe” people. Overcoming
the shame or stigma with these assaults can be extremely mentally and emotionally
taxing. Internal reconciliation may take longer, or never actually occur. You have the
right to defend yourself against non-strangers with the same confidence and tenacity
you would use to fight off any stranger who tried to violate you.

Also, if you are a survivor of sexual assault that was committed by a person known to
you, we encourage you to seek the same help as any other victim of sexual assault. For
some, this may mean taking legal action; for others, this may mean seeking the psycho-
logical support of a counselor or therapist. Please refer to our resource section (page
19) for more options and guidance.

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I t took me 10 years to admit to myself, and then to others, that I was a survivor of rape.
It happened on a night with mutual friends, alcohol, and while I was out of town in an
environment that was unfamiliar to me. At the time of the assault, I used all of these
circumstances to tell myself that I had participated in the act, when in reality, my verbal
and physical resistance indicated otherwise. It is so common for women to believe that
because we didn’t physically “fight” him off, we invited it, and it wasn’t rape. This is not true.
When we are faced with a situation that seems impossible to get out of, or would require
a battle we don’t believe we are equipped for, we often feel we have no other choice
than to continue without resistance. This form of cooperation can even be considered a
survival tool in some circumstances, but it does not mean that we allowed it, wanted it,
asked for it, invited it, or chose it. If we did not offer our consent, it is sexual assault, and
in many cases, including mine, it was rape. It took me embarking on my journey in
Women Empowered to garner the confidence to acknowledge the reality of what
happened, and then share my story with others. In order to authentically ask others to
advocate for themselves, I first had to be an advocate for myself. Self-defense doesn’t
end if/when an assault takes place. Self-defense is the mindset that we deserve to be
protected, supported, and safe, and that may mean seeking help after an incident
occurs. One might think that acknowledging a sexual assault would make someone feel
powerless. In reality, it wasn’t until I was able to identify it as such that I was finally able
to take back the control that I felt was stolen from me that night. I know that if I were put
in the exact same situation, all these years later, I now have an arsenal of physical
and psychological tools to defend against him. As the shame was stripped away, my
power emerged.

- Eve
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BELIEVING IN BOUNDARIES
Our boundary setting tools are just as important, if not more important, than the physical
tools explored in this program. In order to prepare to use these tools, we first have to
understand the reasons why many may choose NOT to use verbal assertiveness to set
boundaries and draw attention in threatening scenarios. Foremost among these reasons
is a belief that we are not entitled to have boundaries and/or that unwanted behavior
must be tolerated. Other reasons pertain to misconceptions about verbal assertiveness,
such as the following:
MISCONCEPTION: In order to be a good person, I must be polite to others
(even strangers) at all times.
Reality: While being polite and courteous to the people around us is generally a positive
social construct, it should not be prioritized over our safety. When we are alone, or in any
situation that makes us feel uncomfortable, we should follow our instincts and prioritize our
safety over the feelings of others. As an example, if you are by yourself at a gas station, and
a man asks for your help because he is having car trouble, you have every right to prioritize
your safety, tell him you are unable to help, and immediately leave that gas station.
You can always call help for him once you get to a safer location, if you really think he
needs it. Anyone who is well-meaning will understand that a woman who is by herself in
an isolated area cannot be expected to help others, since it would put her safety at risk.
MISCONCEPTION: I will be embarrassed if I over-react to someone who isn’t
actually a threat.
Reality: If your verbal self-defense is effective, you will never truly know what someone’s
intentions were. However, if you set firm verbal boundaries with someone who is an
actual threat, chances are they will attempt to make you feel like you are over-reacting
or being rude – they may even call you crazy. This attempt to embarrass you is expected
behavior from someone who actually had bad intentions, and was called out for his
behavior before getting away with it. Someone who is well-meaning will likely understand
that you felt threatened by them, and respect your space and wishes.
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MISCONCEPTION: Being verbally assertive can make the situation more
dangerous.
Reality: When addressing this misconception, the best question to ask ourselves is: What
would a potential (stranger) perpetrator want us to do? His ideal scenario is that we
either ignore him all together, allowing him to approach us without being detected, or
that we shyly engage in conversation, allowing him to get close to us while he plans his
next move. Based on this, we can infer that our best bet is to do the exact opposite of
what he wants! Asserting a boundary both verbally and with body posture makes it clear
to him that he is on our radar and will not be able to approach us without our resistance.
Additionally, it is unrealistic to think that any respectful person with good intentions will
suddenly attack you just because you felt unsafe and established a verbal boundary.
MISCONCEPTION: The more verbally aggressive you are, the better.
Reality: As mentioned above, verbal assertiveness is unlikely to escalate a situation when
applied appropriately. At the same time, when it comes to addressing a potential threat,
it is important to know there is a threshold for combative energy – the point at which a
potentially violent person chooses to become an actually violent person – and we want
to maintain assertiveness without crossing that threshold. While many women would love
the opportunity to tell off every man who intentionally makes her feel uncomfortable,
avoiding violence is much more important than “telling them about themselves.”
An assertive statement made with open hands and a confident stance conveys:
“Don’t come any closer. I see you as a threat, and I am prepared for what comes my way.”
On the other hand, approaching someone with derogatory words and clenched fists
can send the signal: “I am a threat to you and your perceived position of power,” and
this could garner a violent response that puts us in more danger.
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NOT ALL BOUNDARIES ARE CREATED EQUAL
Before we discuss specific boundary setting tools, it is important to acknowledge that
how we choose to set a boundary may depend on who you are dealing with and how
they relate to you.
Figure 2 represents the spectrum of relationships and how it can influence our comfort
with setting a boundary.
Referring to the graph above, your familiarity with the individual increases along the
horizontal axis. For example, a complete stranger who you will likely never see again is on
the far left, and on the far right may be someone you know extremely well, such as a family
member. Along the vertical axis, the level of perceived power or authority increases as
you go up. At the bottom of this axis may be a child; at the top of this could be a police
officer. What we can infer from this graph is when the level of perceived power and/
or the level of familiarity increases, setting boundaries becomes more challenging (the
pink area). Someone you know very well who also holds a position of power (such as
a boss) is likely the most difficult individual against whom to set a boundary. It is impor-
tant to understand this so you can be prepared for a high level of discomfort in these
situations. And how do you prepare? By practicing boundary setting techniques and
believing in your right to set boundaries in the first place. statement, at progressively higher intensity levels, until he acknowledges the boundary.
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VERBAL SELF-DEFENSE STRATEGIES
Here are some specific verbal tools we can use to help us set boundaries with others.
The Three-Part Statement
When dealing with known assailants, especially during the intrusion, desensitization,
and isolation phases, your most important tool is verbal assertiveness to establish and
reinforce your boundaries. The clearer a boundary is, the harder it is for him to disregard it.
If someone says or does something that makes you uncomfortable, you can use this
Three-Part Statement to establish or reinforce the boundary.
Step 1: State the behavior
Step 2: State how it makes you feel
Step 3: State the desired outcome
Example 1
“When you ask me about my personal life, it makes me feel uncomfortable.
Let’s keep our conversations professional.”
Example 2
“When you touch me like that, it makes me feel disrespected.
Thank you for respecting my personal space moving forward.”
Example 3
“When you insist on me drinking, it feels intrusive.
I’d like you to stop offering me drinks.”
In all of the above examples, you could choose to use the broad term “uncomfortable”
if being more specific makes you feel uneasy.
When delivering the Three-Part Statement, stand tall with your shoulders back, maintain
eye-contact, present a calm, serious face, and use a firm voice to stress the gravity of the
situation and your commitment to neutralizing the predator’s behavior. If the predator
senses any degree of uncertainty or hesitation in your statement, he may misinterpret or
intentionally dismiss your statement. Even with a clear delivery, he may ask, “Why?” Just
remember, you are under no obligation to explain further. You can answer simply, “It just
does,” and then repeat the desired outcome (see The Conversational Web on page 49).
If the predator ignores your request, use the “Broken Record” strategy – simply repeat your
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Other Boundary Setting Techniques

Get Support: Based on the scenario or your relationship with that person, you may
Just as we need scalable degrees of violence in our physical self-defense techniques, we wish to seek support to address the situation. This may consist of going to Human
also need scalability in our verbal tools when it comes to boundary setting. Although Resources or someone else who can assist you in addressing or ending the behavior.
there is no doubt that the Three-Part Statement is the clearest form of boundary setting,
Any On-the-fly Strategy To Get The Desired Result: Women have many strategies
and you have every right to use it anytime you experience discomfort with someone’s
they can use to get their desired outcome. While it helps to have reliable strategies
behavior, some women may choose other methods to get their point across. In some
in your toolbox, don’t feel tied to any one of these, and feel free to implement your
cases, a more direct and candid approach with a firmer tone works well. In other cases, a
own on the spot (e.g.,“I think I’m getting sick,”“My kid has lice,”“My ribs are sore from
woman may initially use a “softer” approach in light of her relationship to the person and
crushing people in jiu-jitsu.”)
the circumstances. Although we have absolutely no obligation to allow a potential
perpetrator to “save face,” a woman may choose this approach if she believes it
If these strategies are not effective in accomplishing your desired outcome, then you
beneficial. To help you understand some other options, we will use the hypothetical
can revert back to the Three-Part Statement. When applying the more subtle strategies,
situation of a co-worker that goes out of his way to hug you every time he sees you, and
you can think of it as offering them an “opportunity” to do what is right while still “saving
you’d rather he not.
face,” but when they do not understand your stance, don’t hesitate to make it crystal
Humor: Even though their behavior is anything but humorous, we can sometimes clear to them.
use humor to effectively direct the person away from the undesired behavior: With
your arm extended and your hand out in a “stop” gesture, say, “Wait. Stop right SELECTING THE BOUNDARY SETTING TECHNIQUE
there. ” Then, half-smiling, “If I hug YOU at work, then I have to hug EVERYBODY, and
There is no one right way to set a boundary, and different situations may call for different
I ain’t got time for that!”
strategies.
The Candid Response: Sometimes it may feel necessary just to tell someone,“Stop,”
or, “I don’t want a hug,” with a firm tone. Again, if you are asked why, “It doesn’t work In addition to considering where the person falls on the Boundary Setting Spectrum
for me,” is another way to respond. If he needs clarification on what exact behavior (Figure 2), another determining factor in how you choose to set a boundary is your
you want him to stop, you can revert back to the Three-Part Statement. If he responds desired outcome. This may range from “I want to be safe” to “I want the behavior to stop” to
defensively, remember that you don’t owe him any explanations. You can end the “I never want him to repeat this behavior again, with me or anyone else.” (See Figure 3.)
conversation with, “I get that you don’t understand my reasons, and I don’t need
you to. I just need the behavior to stop.”
State Your Preference: Rather than the full Three-Part Statement, you can simply
state your preference for your desired outcome: “I prefer handshakes,” while offering
your hand.
Separate Their Intentions From Their Actions: If you believe it may be the case, you
can explain to them you don’t think their intentions were to be intrusive; however, their
There is no right or wrong desired outcome for a situation; our hope is that you are simply
behavior will not be tolerated. This can reduce their instinct to become defensive
clear about what you want before acting. Where the person falls in the Boundary Setting
or desire retaliation, and may make them more open to hearing your concern:
Spectrum can also impact your desired outcome for a particular situation.
“I believe you are trying to be friendly and warm by hugging, but I prefer to greet with
handshakes instead of hugs.”

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Boundary Pushback
Here are some examples of some different desired outcomes, and how the boundary
setting technique used in each circumstance supports that outcome: When addressing someone who doesn’t respect boundaries, it is very likely that he will
EXAMPLE 1 offer some pushback on your initial attempt to set one. Anticipating their responses will
“I want to be safe.” help us deal with the pushback more decisively. Their resistant behaviors/responses may
A person stands behind you in line at a grocery store who smells like alcohol and is making include the following:
you uncomfortable by continuously brushing up against you. You immediately grab your
grocery basket and move to another line. Questioning Slander
“What is your problem?” Spreading rumors or lies about you.
You removed yourself from the situation without having to verbally address the behavior. The
behavior did not stop, but you protected your boundaries by removing yourself from his space, Retaliation Humiliation
so he can no longer be a threat to you. You are safe. Seeking a way to damage Shaming you in the
your reputation or humiliate you. presence of other people.
EXAMPLE 2
“I want the behavior to stop” Trivializing the interaction Challenging the boundary
There is a man at your gym who consistently tries to engage in conversation with you. “Don’t flatter yourself!” “What are you going to do about it?”
His conversations are often attempts at finding out about your personal life. You do not
It is important to recognize that these behaviors are a reflection of his own insecurities, lack
want to continue these conversations, and want to remain focused on your workouts. You
of respect, and perhaps his own humiliation. They do not reflect reality, and by setting a
say to him, “I come to the gym only to get a workout, and not to engage in personal
personal boundary you, in no way, warranted any of these responses. One way you can
conversations with others. I would like you to leave me to focus on my workout.”
respond is the following:
While there may be other people who enjoy being social at the gym, you do not. You communicate
that you want this engagement with you to stop. The desired outcome is that he respects the I see you are _________ (questioning/retaliating/attempting to slander my name,
boundary and stops the behavior. If he continues with the behavior, you may have to resort to etc.) because I set a boundary with you. I won’t let you do that.
other options.
You don’t owe him any further explanation nor do you need to engage with him any longer.
EXAMPLE 3
“I want him to never repeat this behavior again with me, or anyone else.” If he does respond with any of these forms of resistance to the boundary, you can
Your co-worker with whom you have worked on a few projects makes you feel
assure yourself that you have identified someone who is a threat to your safety. This is
uncomfortable by always complimenting you on your outfit or your body. You pull him
an emotionally manipulative individual that has been testing your boundaries in a very
aside and say “John, I’m not sure if you’re aware of this, and you may even be meaning
calculated manner, and you should continue to enforce boundaries or keep distance
it as a compliment, but when you make comments about what I am wearing or my
body, either in private or around other people, it makes me feel like I am not being from this person.
taken seriously. I’d like you to stop making those comments to me. As someone who
knows what a great partner you can be on a project, I would hate to see other women Boundary setting is an extremely effective empowerment tool. Just like with our physical
start to avoid working with you because of this behavior. My recommendation to you self-defense techniques, we will get better at setting boundaries the more we practice,
would be to keep the conversations more professional, or if you want to compliment and the more we believe that we deserve to set clear boundaries with others. Feel free to
someone, focus on the work they are doing.” role-play boundary setting situations such as those addressed in this section with your
Based on your relationship or perception of how he would receive this information, you saw this
training partner, or with friends.
as an opportunity to not only stop the behavior, but also offer him insight into his actions with the
hopes of influencing his behavior with others. We will have no control over whether he actually
stops or changes his behavior.
“Daring to set boundaries is about having the courage to love ourselves ,
even when we risk disappointing others.”
– Brené Brown

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The Conversational Web
Predators may use the “Conversational Web” during the early phases of an assault. This
ploy involves the predator sidestepping your attempts to set boundaries by drawing you
into a conversation. For example, you might say, “When you ask me about my personal
life, it makes me feel uncomfortable. I’d like you to stop.” The predator responds with,
“I’m not trying to make you feel uncomfortable – I just want to get to know you better.
After all, I’ve told you personal things about myself.” You can see how easy it would be
to get tangled up in a whole new conversation.
Common indicators of the Conversational Web include: someone asking you to justify your
position on an issue, trying to change your decision, or simply staying on topic after you’ve
stated your decision. The predator’s ultimate goal is to engage you in a conversation
long enough to eventually persuade you to do something you don’t want to do, or
to question your own boundaries. The key to defending against it is to recognize it as it
develops, and then use or re-use a strong Three-Part Statement to draw the line and end
the conversation. It may be necessary to walk away or turn away to truly put an end to it.
UNDERSTANDING CONSENT
When talking about sexual activity, consent is an agreement between two people to
engage in such activity. It means that both participants mutually communicated that
they wanted to move forward with the sexual act. Here is some important information
regarding consent:
Unless both parties communicate a clear “yes,” then there is not consent, and the
desiring party must assume “no.” Many people believe that as long as the person
does not say “no,” then it is consensual. This is not true.
If one party has used coercion, manipulation, pressure, force, drugs, or alcohol
to gain compliance, or if the target is underage, there is NOT consent.
Just because someone had invited sexual advances in the past does not mean
that all future sexual activity is consensual.
A woman reserves the right to change her mind at any point during the course of the
sexual activity, and any new boundaries should be respected.
Just because two people may be in a relationship (dating/engaged/married) does
not imply that all sexual activity is consensual.
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Some may wrongly believe that if someone says “no” while smiling or laughing, they
don’t truly mean “no.” This is not true.
Simply put, unless it’s a clean “yes,” or both parties mutually and deliberately make physical
advances, it is not consent. If there isn’t consent, and the other party continues with
the sexual activity, it’s sexual assault.
VICTIM BLAMING
One of the many reasons the majority of sexual assaults go unreported is because the
dialogue surrounding a sexual assault often wrongly focuses on what the woman was
doing before the assault occurred. This is called “victim blaming,” and it suggests the
woman played an “active” role in the assault or caused it to happen in some way. This is
never true. Regardless of what a woman wears, drinks, or does before a sexual assault
takes place, absolutely no responsibility lies in the hands of the victim. It is a man’s
responsibility to acknowledge and respect any boundary a woman sets, regardless of
their initial assumptions or what happened before the boundary was established. Also,
just because a woman may have her guard down on a particular occasion (e.g.,
she is having fun with friends and not thinking about potential threats), or she is
under the influence of alcohol, does not give anyone the right to take advantage of her
vulnerable state. The conversation around “preventing” sexual assault should focus on
the perpetrators, and helping men of all ages and backgrounds understand the impor-
tance of consent.
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COLLEGE CONCERNS
Figure 4: Victim-Offender Relationship for Rape Victimizations Committed
A national survey found that 83% of the women who reported being raped at some by Single Offenders
point in their lives were under the age of 25 at the time of the incident. This indicates that
50
college-aged women are within this high-risk range. A recent study entitled “The Sexual
43.5
Victimization of College Women” revealed that approximately 24% of all female college
students have been sexually assaulted and that non-strangers conducted 90% of the 40
Completed rape
reported sexual assaults. In this section, we will explore some additional statistics and 35.5
34.2 Attempled rape
safety considerations that, when used in combination with the non-stranger survival

Percentage of sample
strategies discussed in the previous section, will increase awareness and optimize safety 30
for female college students. 24.2 23.7

Who Are the Perpetrators? 20

14.5
As Figure 4 illustrates, the study on the sexual victimization of college women also provided
a detailed breakdown of the victim-offender relationship in all the reported incidences of 9.7
10 8.1
non-stranger sexual assault. 4.0
2.6
0
Classmate Friend Boyfriend/ Acquaintance Other
ex-boyfriend
Offender

Where do the Assaults Take Place?

According to the study, most of the sexual assaults reported by college women occurred
off campus in bars and nightclubs or in student residences close to campus. Of the
assaults that took place on campus, the majority of sexual victimizations, especially
rapes and physically coerced sexual contact, occurred in living quarters. Almost 60% of
the completed rapes that occurred on campus took place in the target’s residence, 30%
occurred in other living quarters on campus, and about 10% took place in a fraternity.

Who is Most Likely to be Targeted?

The most significant factor correlating the targets of sexual assault is frequency of alcohol
consumption. Predators targeted women who were under the influence of alcohol
more frequently than sober women. This is likely because alcohol reduces the ability of
anyone to resist an assault. They also targeted freshmen and sophomores more than
upperclassmen. This is not surprising, because younger people are often still developing
their boundary setting capabilities.

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Critical Campus Strategies

5. Defend Relentlessly: Do not hesitate to defend yourself using verbal assertiveness
While college can be a wonderful time for growth and making life-long connections, it
strategies and your physical self-defense techniques if someone violates your
is important to keep in mind that campuses are potentially dangerous places. Here are
boundaries. Don’t let the familiarity of a fellow college student cause you to second-
five critical things you can do to make your college experience as safe and positive as
guess your actions. Regardless of what you permit, overlook, or dismiss in the early
possible:
stages of a relationship, you always have the right to prevent further advances or
1. Consume Safely: Alcohol is the most commonly used “date rape drug.” Students intrusions. If trapped against your will, use any means to escape.
who are mentally and physically impaired by alcohol are less able to identify risky
situations, make confident decisions, and respond physically if/when they are Your college experience should be an enjoyable time to learn and grow. Remember
assaulted. If you’re going to consume alcohol, make sure you have a trusted that popular behavior isn’t always the safest behavior. The odds are that someone
friend serving as a “designated defender” at the gathering. Maybe you are that will test your boundaries at some point during your time at college; the sooner you
friend! This friend’s job is to remain sober and to ensure that no one in the group is draw the line, the more quickly you will be able to detect and respond to inappropriate
isolated from the crowd or caught off guard by anyone, regardless of how familiar behavior. Always remember that your true friends will respect your boundaries.
they may be.
2. Trust Cautiously: With non-strangers (classmates, friends, boyfriends, acquaintances, DOMESTIC VIOLENCE
etc.) conducting 90% of all sexual assaults, it is imperative you be mindful of your social
Domestic violence (or relationship abuse) is a pattern of behaviors used by one partner
interactions. If someone you know has malicious intentions, they will go to extraordinary
to maintain power and control over another partner in an intimate relationship. (22)
lengths to build an intimate relationship they can exploit through sexual assault. Make
There are many reasons why people stay in abusive relationships. Some of these reasons
friends, and enjoy life, but trust your instincts – if someone makes you uncomfortable, don’t
include fear, embarrassment, love, children, extended family or community pressures,
trust them and avoid being isolated with them.
religious beliefs, or lack of financial resources. Ending the relationship can be difficult
3. Invite Carefully: With “classmates” or “friends” conducting over half of all sexual for the survivor, and even dangerous. In order to put an end to violence, we must first be
assaults and 60% of on-campus rapes taking place in the target’s residence, having able to identify if a relationship is abusive.
a male acquaintance over for an evening study session can potentially be a risk.
It is crucial you be careful about whom you allow into your house, apartment, or
dorm room. Always consider the option of meeting with a classmate in a public
place. If you must bring someone new into your place of residence, then ensure you
have one or more trusted friends there with you.
4. Establish Boundaries: The strongest boundaries are those that you establish
long before they are tested. Decide now what you will and won’t tolerate from the
various people in your life (friends, classmates, acquaintances, etc.) so that it will
be easier to speak out when someone crosses the line. If someone says or does
something that makes you uncomfortable, immediately and clearly tell them how
you feel. The act of boundary setting will not disrupt true friendships. Keep close
friends, but remember that no one will care more about your safety than you.

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The Relationship Spectrum
All relationships exist on a spectrum, anywhere from healthy to unhealthy to abusive.
Here are some indicators of a healthy relationship:
Open Communication
Respect
Boundaries
Trust
Honesty
In an abusive relationship, here are behaviors that one partner may engage in:
Communicating in a way that is
hurtful, threatening, demeaning,
humiliating, or makes the other
feel “crazy.”
Not respecting the opinions,
thoughts, voice, or physical safety of
the other.
Accusing the other of cheating when
it’s not true. He may use this to justify
exerting more control or hurting the
other partner verbally or physically.
Denying that the abusive behavior is
abuse. This can happen by blaming
the other partner, suggesting that the
behavior is a result of love, or making
other excuses for the behavior.
Controlling the other partner.
Only one partner is allowed to
make the decisions.
Isolating the other by controlling
who they talk to, where they go,
and who they spend time with.
They may isolate their partner
from family and friends.
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The Cycle of Violence
Studies have shown that most intimate partner abuse follows a similar pattern. This is
now known as The Cycle of Domestic Violence. (24) While not all violent relationships
follow this cycle exactly, understanding this pattern may help someone identify whether
Enjoyment
her relationship is on the abusive spectrum. It also helps explain why many people stay
Equality in abusive relationships. The cycle is comprised of three phases:
Mutual sexual choices
Financial partnership
Supportive parenting
Forcing the other partner
to have sex, or forcing a
pregnancy.
Exerting financial control over
the other by limiting the other
partner’s access to financial
resources or information.
Engaging in manipulative
parenting where one parent
uses the child(ren) to gain
power or control over the other.
Destroying the other partner’s
property or harming their pets.
Threatening to commit suicide
if the other partner leaves.
Threatening to hurt or harm the
other partner, their child(ren), or
the other partner’s family if the
other partner leaves.
(25)
Physically hurting the other From the cycle above, one can see how the honeymoon phase can make it difficult to
partner. This could be grabbing,
leave in hope that the relationship really will improve and the abuse will end. In most cases,
shaking, pushing, hitting, or any
the only way for the cycle to end is for the relationship to end. Unfortunately, the most
behavior that makes the partner
dangerous time for the victim in an abusive relationship is when he/she tries to leave.
feel physically unsafe.
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The Path to Safety

If you believe you are in an abusive relationship and would like to regain control, it
is important you create a safety plan for you and your family. Whether you are in a
relationship, planning to leave, or have already left an abusive relationship, you can
create a safety plan that is tailored to your situation. Please contact TheHotline.org for
more information and for assistance with safety planning.

If you have sought out the Women Empowered program because you are in, or are a
survivor of, a domestic violence relationship, here are some important points:

In cases of domestic violence, it is not our intent that the Women Empowered
program should take the place of a safety plan. Quite the contrary, it is best that a
safety plan be in place and specialized guidance be sought through advocates,
in addition to learning our self-defense techniques.
You are not alone. 1 out of 5 women have been severely physically abused by her
partner. (22) There are communities of women ready and willing to support you on
your journey.
We are proud of you. By embarking on the Women Empowered program you are
taking steps to regain control in your life. You are on the path to safety.
Focus on survival. A large part of our program focuses on neutralizing threats without
escalation, and simply surviving the worst-case scenarios. We want you to have the
tools to keep yourself safe if your partner decides to retaliate or act out in violence.
Only you know the details of your situation, so you should feel empowered to decide
what principles and techniques may or may not apply as a tool to keep you safe.
Our goal is that by building your confidence through self-defense, you will feel
empowered to make personal choices that will not only get you to safety, but help
keep you there.

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A MAN’S ROLE
There are many great men who, like many women, feel hopeless in the battle against
sexual assault. If you are a man who wants to know what you can do and how you can
help, here are some important actions you can take to support survivors and help prevent
violence against women.
Lead by example. This is one of the most important roles a man can assume in
the fight against sexual violence. By exemplifying respectful communication and
interactions with women, you are serving as a much needed role model for other
men and boys.
Understand consent. While many men (and women) believe they understand
consent, many do not fully understand what constitutes a consensual engagement.
Consent does not just apply to sexual activity, and you can practice this
understanding in your everyday interactions. For example, rather than hugging
someone (young or old) without their participation, ask if you can have a hug, and
respect their response – even if it is your own child!
Educate other men/boys. Help other men and boys understand consent. Some
young men are never educated about consent by someone they know and trust,
and then embark on their adolescent years as a potential liability to themselves and
others. When the belief that women should have autonomous control of their bodies
is modeled and spoken about, our younger generations will subscribe to those same
beliefs. When speaking to other men/boys about a woman/girl, rather than only
focusing on her appearance, talk about her as a complete human being. When
women are only described by their appearance, it reinforces the belief that women
are one-dimensional and serve only one purpose: to be an attractive physical
specimen for other men. When you focus on women’s other attributes such as their
intelligence, humor, or unique capabilities, it reinforces the belief that women are
equal contributors to society, and should be treated with respect.
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Bystander intervention. Whether it was a catcall, an inappropriate sexual joke, or
a physical sexual assault, most men have witnessed some form of sexual harassment
in their lives. As bystanders of the behavior, you can do something about it. Here are
some ways you can intervene when witnessing sexual harassment or sexual assault.
Explain to the perpetrator that his behavior was inappropriate. You can say things like:
“that was inappropriate” or “that was sexual harassment” or “you just made her feel really
uncomfortable.” By calling out his behavior, we are identifying that it is not an acceptable
way of communicating in our society.
Talk to her. Depending on her state of vulnerability and your relationship to her, you can
offer some private acknowledgement of what just happened. “I’m sorry he said that to you.
I think that was extremely inappropriate.”
Be an advocate. One of the many reasons women don’t report sexual harassment is the
fear of not being taken seriously. As a witness of the behavior, you can offer your support in
reporting the incident. For example, if it occurs in the workplace, you can offer to go with
the woman to report the behavior to Human Resources. Knowing she has support and a
witness to the behavior may make her feel more empowered to speak up.
Physically intervene. Men who invest in their self-defense capabilities are more likely to
intervene when witnessing someone being mistreated. If you see a woman being hurt or
physically assaulted, having physical self-defense tools, and the confidence to use them,
will allow you to intervene safely. If you have not yet embarked on the self-defense journey,
go to www.GracieUniversity.com, and enjoy the first three lessons of the Gracie Combatives
program for free.
Believe them. Another reason women don’t report sexual assault is because of the
fear of being accused of lying, or being told they are overreacting. They often know
it is her word vs. his word, and it can be difficult to prove his guilt. Sexual predators
are often very well liked personalities in social settings, and this can make people
in their circles question the validity of an accusation. Just because someone is well
liked, good looking, funny, charming, financially successful, or a public figure does
not mean they are incapable of abuse. It is an extremely difficult and emotional
process to follow through with a sexual assault allegation, and they should never
be taken lightly. Your default response to an allegation should always be that the
woman is telling the truth.
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S E C T I O N

3
“ ”
We learn how to

so we

have to

– Rener Gracie
 THE EMPOWERMENT HANDBOOK
N
o matter how diligently we practice awareness or how effectively we establish
boundaries, there is always the risk that a determined attacker will make it past our
initial lines of defense. Regardless of your age or physical condition, you CAN and you
DESERVE to defend yourself. You have the moral and legal right to defend yourself even if
the assailant hasn’t made physical contact. Many people fear that fighting back will anger
the attacker and worsen the outcome. Statistics strongly suggest that your odds of survival
are far greater if you do fight back, and your risk of injury is no greater than if you don’t.
There are no “right” or “wrong” techniques in the context of a self-defense fight for your
life. Every assault is different, and the only thing that matters is your survival. Our objective
in the Women Empowered program isn’t to give you a precise technique for every
possible scenario – that would be impossible. Instead, we want to use our exploration
of the most common threat scenarios and reliable self-defense techniques to empower
you with an understanding of the principles that can be applied to any situation you find
yourself in.
Everything you will learn is based on the time-tested principles of Gracie Jiu-Jitsu –
leverage, timing, and energy efficiency – so that you can complete the program
regardless of your age or physical ability. In addition, Women Empowered is the only
self-defense system that effectively addresses what to do when an assailant pins you
to the ground against your will. Without any previous experience, you will learn the
techniques and elevate your confidence with Women Empowered!
WOMEN EMPOWERED FOR HEALING
While learning self-defense can be an extremely empowering experience for survivors of
assault, it can also bring up painful or overwhelming emotions. Due to the nature of the
content of the Women Empowered program and this survival manual, it is possible some
participants may experience triggers. A “trigger” is something that causes one to have
flashbacks or vivid memories about a past trauma. It can cause an onset of emotions, a
“fight, flight or freeze” response, anxiety, or an uncontrolled physical response such as an
inability to move. If you experience triggering while practicing the physical techniques,
stop the practice, try to identify what is happening with your body and mind, and if
possible in this space and time, allow yourself to express the emotions that come up,
even if that means crying or yelling. Take as much time as you need to re-ground yourself
and identify your emotions. The following is some information provided by Anna Pirkl,
Marriage and Family Therapist (BBS 89201) and a Women Empowered graduate.
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Grounding Techniques
When we sense that we are in danger, our body’s sympathetic nervous system prepares to run or fight.
Our body releases adrenaline and prioritizes which bodily functions are most needed at that time, and
which are not. Our breathing changes. We may hyperventilate or we may hold our breath. We may lose
touch with our hands and feet or begin to feel dizzy, floating, or no longer connected to the ground. These
processes are a normal part of a healthy body’s response to danger. When someone is triggered, her body
may falsely sense that she is in danger, and experience one, or several of these reactions. In order to stop
the release of adrenaline and come back to the present, the following are just three of many Grounding
Techniques used by mental health professionals.
1. REGROUND YOURSELF: Reconnect to the ground under your feet by stomping each of your feet one at a time into the
floor. Do you feel your heel, the ball of your foot, and toes connecting to the floor? See if you can wiggle and find each
individual toe. Now notice your legs. Without looking, see if you can notice where your clothing touches your legs. Is it
soft, loose, or snug? Now, notice how you are feeling overall. Do you need more time to return to a peaceful state? If you
still feel uncomfortable and want to ground yourself further, find a place to sit down and lean against something (on a
chair with a back, or against a wall) and continue the grounding exercise. Without looking, notice what it is made out of
and how it feels (soft, hard, comfortable?). Notice how it is safely holding your weight. Now see if you can very slowly
scan your body from your head down to your toes. Try to find and release any tension you feel in your body.
2. DIAPHRAGMATIC BREATHING: One of the most helpful regrounding techniques is to check in with your breathing. Take a
deep breath in through your nose and extend your belly out. Exhale slowly. You may also try ujjayi breathing (inhale through
the nose to completely fill the lungs, and while slightly contracting the throat, exhale through the nose). Do this 3-7 times.
These breaths help to activate the parasympathetic system that slows down and stops the adrenaline from pumping and
works to return your body to a calm state. Once your breathing is back to normal, you can check in on the rest of your body.
3. SCALING: Ideally, we would like to be aware of where we are at on a scale of 1 – 10. 1 is calm and content. 10 is
extreme discomfort. 4, 5, and 6 are where we do our best work to grow and learn in the discomfort. If you are quickly
approaching 7 or are already in 8, 9, or 10, you are at risk of re-traumatizing yourself and could potentially make the
memory or reaction worse. If this is the case, it is important to revisit steps 1 and 2 until you find yourself at a 6 or below.
At this point, reassess what feels right for you. Honor your body’s needs, whether it is to stop training for
the day, or to continue. You may need to simply sit and breathe for a while longer, or you might be ready to
get up and go. Be aware that like our other techniques, these three tools will serve you better in the time
of need if you practice them before you are actually triggered.
It can be very helpful to practice these tools with the aid of a mental health professional. In the midst
of being triggered, it can be very difficult to remember all the above steps. Having a therapist walk you
through the steps until you have mastered them makes it much easier for you to access them within
yourself during future acute situations.
- Anna Pirkl, Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (BBS 89201)
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In addition, discussing these triggers with a professional or someone you trust can assist
in the overall healing process from trauma. While discovering your triggers is a difficult
process for all survivors, it can be a part of the healing process when addressed in
a healthy manner. If you wish to overcome a particular trigger, along with seeking
professional help, you can experiment with trying small amounts of the triggering
experience at a time, and then increase your exposure in a gradual and manageable
way. Always refer back to your Grounding Techniques should you need them. You may
continue until you have successfully managed your emotions to the point that the
experience is no longer a trigger. It is also possible that triggers can reappear, even long
after you believe you have overcome them. We ask that you have patience with yourself
and this process. You should embark on this journey at your pace, and you should feel in
no rush to get back to practicing a particular position or technique that caused a trigger.
LESSON STRUCTURE
The Women Empowered program consists of 20 lessons. In these lessons, we will teach
you how to escape the most common control holds including wrist grabs, chokeholds,
and bear hugs. You will also master the critical physical and psychological techniques
that will enable you to avoid panic and escape from a larger attacker who has pinned
you to the ground. As the lessons progress, we will teach you how to defend against less
likely but equally frightening attacks including an assailant armed with a knife or gun, as
well as several deadly force options you can use when escape is not an option.
What makes the video course so successful is that we present the Women Empowered
lessons in precisely the same order and lesson format that you would experience if you were
to receive one-on-one lessons from a Gracie University instructor in Torrance, California.
EACH LESSON HAS UP TO FIVE COMPONENTS
1. Technical Slices: To facilitate the learning process, we break down each core
concept or technique into a series of simplified drills or “slices.” Once you’ve mastered
all the slices individually, we show you how to apply all the details and variations in
combination with one another.
2. Silent Demo: After each slice, we demonstrate the technique silently. After
watching it a few times, you can loop this video while drilling the technique, so
you always have a visual reference to guide your practice.
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3. Reflex Development Drill: In some lessons we have a Reflex Development Drill.
During these drills we will teach you how to execute all the variations of the newly
learned technique in combination with previously learned techniques. The Reflex
Development Drills train you to remain calm and avoid panic by strengthening your
ability to choose the most applicable technique for any particular threat scenario.
4. Mindset Minute: At the end of each lesson, we summarize the most important
details, concepts, and principles of the featured technique.
5. Fight Philosophy: In some lessons, we have Fight Philosophy discussions. These
discussions cover some critical self-defense principles and are, in some ways, more
important than the physical techniques. Many of these concepts will be tested in
the Pink Belt Qualification Test, so don’t skip ahead!
The Importance of Review
Before you begin any new lesson, it is imperative that you do a rapid review of all of
the previously learned techniques. This will help build confidence and strengthen your
reflexes. The further you advance through the curriculum, the more techniques you’re
expected to review. As your execution of the techniques sharpens, your training partner
can increase the level of resistance, or practice on your weak side in order to maximize
the productivity of your review sessions.
RECOMMENDED TRAINING SCHEDULE
It is essential that you study the Women Empowered video lessons in the prescribed
sequence, since each technique builds on the skills learned in previous lessons. We
designed each lesson so that you can complete it in 30-60 minutes. Do not start a new
lesson until you have memorized all of the steps of your current lesson and can execute the
technique with ease. If you can execute the technique on both the left and the right side
of your body with equal effectiveness, then you are ready to advance to the next lesson.
When going through the program for the first time, we recommend that you practice at
least two to three days per week to reinforce your knowledge of the techniques. Practicing
one day a week is certainly better than nothing, but the extended period of time between
each training session will decrease your retention of the lessons. If you have the time and
the passion, it is okay to complete more than one lesson on any given day. This is especially
true for some of the simpler techniques in the program.
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Most importantly, it is absolutely essential that you cycle through all 20 lessons at least
four times before you consider the program “completed.” There is a huge difference
between simply memorizing the steps of a technique and internalizing it to the point of
developing the reflexes and conviction that will save you during a real assault. No matter
how dedicated or focused you are when you first cycle through the lessons, our experience
has taught us that these additional cycles provide two crucial benefits. First, you will
pick up on several important details each time you re-watch a lesson, and second,
your confidence in the execution of the techniques will grow immensely with repeated
practice. With this program, we have provided a Progress Tracker Card to facilitate review
sessions and track your lesson progress, along with an 80-day Recommended
Training Schedule to guide you through the cycling of each lesson a total of four times.

GRACIEUNIVERSITY.COM
If you haven’t yet, make sure you log on to GracieUniversity.com and create your free
online profile. This is how we will stay connected to you throughout your training, answer
any of your questions, and eventually evaluate you for your pink belt. If you visit the
Women Empowered section, you will have access to the technique forums where other
students from around the world have posted their questions, and received answers from
our team of certified instructors. If, at any point during your training, you have a question
that isn’t effectively addressed in the video lessons, you can search these forums for the
answer or submit a new post and a Gracie University instructor will be glad to help you.

You may also use GracieUniversity.com as a resource to find training partners. In

communities where there are no Certified Training Centers, you may use the student
database to connect with others who are eager to learn. If there is a Gracie Garage in
your city, you may consider joining. A Gracie Garage is an unofficial at-home training
group led by a dedicated student with access to the curriculum and training mats. They
are not certified instructors, but like you, they are eager to learn jiu-jitsu with likeminded
training partners. Visit the ‘Members’ tab and then select ‘Students’ within Gracie University
to find dedicated training partners to join you on the jiu-jitsu journey!

To make the most of your learning experience, make sure you familiarize yourself
with all the resources at GracieUniversity.com before you begin.

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THE 20 LESSONS
Listed below are the 20 lessons of the Women Empowered program. For each lesson,
we’ve included the featured slices and a brief description of the technique for quick
reference when you are training without the assistance of the video lessons.
Lesson 1: Combat Base
Slices: Base Get-up | Push/Pull Base
An assailant will usually attempt to remove his target from public view prior to carrying
out the assault to reduce the chance of bystander intervention. In this lesson, we teach
you how to utilize critical base concepts to avoid being pushed or pulled against your will.
Lesson 2: Standard Wrist Releases
Slices: Standard 1-on-1 | Standard 2-on-1 | Standard 2-on-2
A man will often grab a woman by the wrists to control and isolate her. In this lesson, we
teach simple wrist releases that can free you from this common attack, regardless of your
attacker’s strength.
Lesson 3: Inverted Wrist Releases
Slices: Inverted 1-on-1 | Inverted 2-on-1 | Inverted 2-on-2 | Inverted Low |
FP – Phases 1 & 2 (Stranger)
Inverted wrist grabs are more commonly used when the attacker is attempting to control
or demean his target. In this lesson we apply critical concepts of “alavanca” to release
our wrist with ease.
Lesson 4: Trap & Roll Escapes
Slices: Standard | Punch Block | Spread Hand | Wrist-pin | Hair Grab
Being trapped beneath an attacker is a nightmarish experience that may lead to panic,
suffocation, exhaustion, or submission. In this lesson, we teach you how to manipulate
the attacker’s balance to escape this potential worst-case scenario.
Lesson 5: Front Choke Defenses
Slices: Standard | Wall-pin (Two-handed) | Wall-pin (One-handed)
Assailants often attempt to strangle their targets. In this lesson, we teach you several
leverage-based escapes to the most commonly used Front Chokes. These techniques
epitomize Gracie Jiu-Jitsu.
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Lesson 6: Super Slap
Slices: Solo Drill | Super Slap Combos
Striking a larger, stronger assailant in the face with a closed fist has limited effectiveness
and may cause you to break your hand. In this lesson, we teach you how to use a Super
Slap to disrupt the attack and facilitate your escape.
Lesson 7: Punch Block Series
Slices: Stage 1 | Stage 2 | Stage 3 | Stages 4 & 5
The guard is the secret weapon of jiu-jitsu. By applying the critical principles of distance
management and energy efficiency, you can use the Punch Block Series to neutralize
punches from the guard and drain the attacker’s energy until an escape opportunity
presents itself or a submission opportunity arises.
Lesson 8: Guard Get-up
Slices: Shrimp Drill | Kick Drill | Ninja Get-up | Standard Variation | False Surrender |
FP – Phases 3 & 4 (Stranger)
The Guard Get-up is one of the most important physical techniques in the course. During
a sexual assault, the attacker will most likely attempt to get inside the targets’ legs. If this
happens, you will have several variations of the Guard Get-up to help you remain calm
and escape at the right time.
Lesson 9: Guard Get-up Extras
Slices: Rider Variation | Heavy Chest Variation | Choke Variation | Wrist-pin Variation
The greatest challenge when trapped beneath an attacker is to avoid panic and
exhaustion. In Lesson 8, we introduced you to the basic Guard Get-up variations. In this
lesson, we teach you several additional variations of this critically important technique to
ensure you are prepared for all contingencies.
Lesson 10: Stop-Block-Frame
Slices: FP – Boundary Setting (Strangers) | Distance Control | Block & Move | Frame Escape |
FP – 4 Phases (Non-stranger)
Predators will often test their targets’ spatial boundaries prior to initiating an attack. In this
lesson, we teach you how to use verbal assertiveness and confident body language to
establish your personal boundary, as well as what to do if the attacker crosses the line
and physically assaults you.
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Lesson 11: Punch Defense
Slices: Clinch Control | Clinch Entry
One of the fastest ways for an assailant to incapacitate his target is to overwhelm them
with punches. This lesson will teach you how to use optimal distance management to
neutralize strikes and avoid the knockout.
Lesson 12: Guard Chokes
Slices: Triangle Setup | Triangle Choke (Giant Killer) | Triangle Choke (Stage 3) | Shirt Choke |
Guillotine Choke
If an attacker ends up inside your guard, he is susceptible to several highly effective
chokes. In this lesson you will learn how to apply the four most powerful chokes, starting
with the ultra-popular Triangle Choke.
Lesson 13: Hair Grab Defenses
Slices: Standing Armlock | Guard Armlock | Guard-pull Armlock
If an assailant grabs you by the hair, it can either be a major impediment or an incredible
opportunity. In this lesson, we teach you how to turn the tables on all the most common
hair grabs, standing up and on the ground.
Lesson 14: Elbow Escape
Slices: Standard | Heel Drag | Face Down
If the Trap and Roll Escape fails, you can use this “emergency escape” to get the attacker
in your guard. From there, you can neutralize punches more effectively and then use your
guard techniques to escape or submit the enemy when the time is right.
Lesson 15: Shrimp Escape
Slices: Block & Shoot | Shrimp & Shoot | Rider Variation
If you can’t escape from underneath the assailant, you must get him in your guard. In
this lesson you will learn how to use efficient hip movement to slip out from underneath
a larger opponent and reposition him inside your guard from where escapes and
submissions are more easily applied.
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Lesson 16: Arm Chokes
Slices: Guillotine (Standing) | Guillotine (Guard-pull) | Rear Naked Choke | RNC with Hooks
If you are in a confined space, and escape is not an option, you can use one of several
chokes to render an opponent unconscious. In a life or death self-defense situation,
these chokes can also be used as deadly force.
Lesson 17: Rear Attack Defenses
Slices: Rear Choke (Pull Back) | Rear Choke (Shoulder Slip) | Bear Hug (Under-arm) |
Bear Hug (Over-arm)
A surprise attack from behind is one of the most challenging attacks to overcome. In this
lesson, we teach you how to escape when someone attempts to choke you or bear hug
you from behind.
Lesson 18: Weapon Defenses
Slices: FP – A Word on Weapons | Straight Armlock | Kimura
Some sexual predators will use weapons to intimidate and control their victims. In this
lesson, we address the psychological aspects of dealing with an armed assailant, and
then we teach you the most reliable techniques to use if your life is on the line and you
MUST take action.
Lesson 19: Drag Defenses
Slices: Wrist Drag | Ankle Drag | Hair Drag
If an assailant is able to knock you down and begin dragging you, it may be difficult
to avoid abduction. In this lesson, you will learn how to use your legs to reduce the
assailants leverage and break their grips so you can get back to your feet.
Lesson 20: Advanced Guard Get-ups
Slices: Direct Get-up | Knee Shield | Power Frame
If space or time is limited and the standard Guard Get-up variations aren’t effective, use
these advanced variations to eject yourself from the bottom of the fight.
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4
“ and

”
are an

army

– George Herbert
 THE EMPOWERMENT HANDBOOK T H E P I N K B E LT

I n Gracie Jiu-Jitsu, we use different colored belts to reflect each student’s progress
through the system. A student starts as a white belt and progresses through blue belt,
purple belt, brown belt, black belt, and then eventually, red belt over a lifetime of study and
practice. When the belt system was created in the 1960s, very few women practiced Gra-
cie Jiu-Jitsu, and there was no program designed exclusively for women.
When we created Women Empowered, we sought a way to acknowledge a woman’s
successful completion of the course. We wanted to stick with the tradition of awarding
belts, but, because the course featured so many unique techniques, objectives, and
psychology tailored to a special set of circumstances, the standard Gracie Jiu-Jitsu belt
system did not apply. So we decided to add an entirely new belt, and since pink was
one of the only colors not used in the existing belt system, we introduced the Women
Empowered Pink Belt!
women are encouraged to continue earning all Gracie Jiu-Jitsu belts from blue to black,
it became clear that the pink belt isn’t a limitation at all, but rather a beginning for many
women who might have never otherwise given Gracie Jiu-Jitsu a chance.
With a program as enlightening and empowering as this one, I hope that the pink belt,
and all that it takes to earn it, will bring power to a color that some view as uniquely
feminine, or even “weak.” In martial arts, the meaning of the belt is not determined by
its color, but rather, the amount of time, sweat, and dedication that goes into earning it.
For me, and other dedicated students of the Women Empowered program who have
devoted countless hours to earning our pink belts, it has become synonymous with
strength, technique, and empowerment.

What is the Pink Belt?

As with every program in Gracie Jiu-Jitsu (Gracie Combatives, Master Cycle and
Gracie Bullyproof ) awarding belts is the traditional way to acknowledge progress and
accomplishment. With the development of the Women Empowered program, the pink
belt was created to acknowledge completion and mastery of the course. It not only
symbolizes dedication to the techniques of the program, but also an understanding of the
philosophy that is essential for survival in life-threatening scenarios. We hope that this reflexive
understanding of both the philosophy and techniques will instill a confidence in women that
reduces their risk of ever becoming targets in the first place. Since the program was created,
we have watched women dedicate countless hours to earning their pink belts, and with
every pink belt earned, the value and prestige of this belt has grown.

Some women have understandably asked, “Why was pink the color chosen for the belt?”
When selecting the belt color, pink came to us as the only distinct common color not yet
used in jiu-jitsu belt promotions (white, yellow, orange, green, blue, purple, brown, black,
red had all been taken). Because the techniques and philosophy of the Women
Empowered program differ from the general Gracie Jiu-Jitsu curriculum, we felt that
creating a distinctly colored belt for Women Empowered would be a way to symbolize
the uniqueness of the program.

Initially, we realized that tying the pink belt to the Women Empowered program could be
seen as too gender specific and therefore limiting, but when we consider the fact that

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TESTING INSTRUCTIONS
Once you are 100% confident in your execution of all the Women Empowered techniques
we invite you to take the Pink Belt Qualification Test via our Video Evaluation Process.
The belt testing process consists of three steps.
Step 1: Perfect the Techniques
True mastery takes time, so don’t rush to take the test. Cycle through all 20 lessons at least
four times before you consider testing. If a lesson is particularly challenging for you,
dedicate extra time to mastering the move before you test for the pink belt.
Step 2: Record the Test
Once you can confidently execute all of the techniques, you will digitally record your test
performance. When recording:
Begin by stating your name.
State the 4-phase stranger attack strategy.
State the 4-phase non-stranger attack strategy.
Perform all the techniques in the EXACT order we’ve outlined in this section.
Be sure you have a good “bad guy.” Your testing partner should attack you in a
manageable yet realistic fashion.
At the end of the video, tell us what you thought of the program, the reason(s) why
you decided to embark on the jiu-jitsu journey, and the benefits you’ve obtained
from it. We have no time limit for this portion of the recording. You may pause the
camera after the technique demo and take a break before recording this segment.
Step 3: Upload the Video
Once you have digitally recorded your test, upload the video to the online Testing Center
at www.GracieUniversity.com. A Gracie University instructor will evaluate your test based
on the criteria outlined in the next section. If your performance meets Gracie University
standards, we will award you a Women Empowered Pink Belt.
When you upload your test, please disclose any disabilities, injuries, or physical conditions
that prevent you from executing the techniques as demonstrated in the video lessons
so that we may take this information into consideration during your evaluation. Adhere
to the digital file size and format specifications to ensure an efficient upload of your test.
Visit the online Testing Center for more tips on recording and uploading your test video.

Demonstrate all of the techniques within approximately 15 minutes.

Do not stop the camera at any time during the technique demonstration. We
will not evaluate your performance if it appears that all the techniques were
not shot in one take.
You may have someone read the techniques aloud to you if you have trouble
remembering the presentation sequence.

Standing Freestyle Demonstration: For 2 minutes demonstrate as many standing

techniques as possible, on both sides, at various intensity levels in response to the
spontaneous “bad guy” indicators.
Ground Freestyle Demonstration: For 2 minutes demonstrate as many ground
techniques as possible, on both sides, at various intensity levels in response to the
spontaneous “bad guy” indicators.

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EVALUATION CRITERIA LIST OF TECHNIQUES

You will start with 100 points and receive a 1-point deduction for each significant error in During the test, please perform all the techniques in the exact order listed below, and
the following categories: don’t forget to stand up in base every single time!

1. Accuracy: Precise and correct execution. Four Phases of Attack (Stranger) 5. Rear Attack Defenses (4) 11. Punch Block Series (5)
1. Identify an unsuspecting target Rear Choke (Pull Back) Stage 1
Execute the techniques exactly as we teach them on the instructional videos. We will 2. Subdue and isolate the target Rear Choke (Shoulder Slip) Stage 2
accept slight modifications based on different body types and physical capabilities. 3. Control and exhaust the target Rear Bear Hug (Under-arm) Stage 3
4. Carry out the assault Rear Bear Hug (Over-arm) Stage 4
2. Efficiency: Fluid, relaxed movements and efficient use of energy. Stage 5
Four Phases of an Attack (Non-Stranger) 6. Hair Grab Defenses (3)
We want to see you demonstrate maximum use of leverage in every technique. 1. Intrusion Standing Armlock 12. Guard Chokes (4)
Additionally, we want to make sure you know when to move, and when NOT to move – 2. Desensitization Guard Armlock Triangle Choke (Giant Killer)
3. Isolation Guard Pull Variation Triangle Choke (Stage 3)
especially in Phase 3.
4. Carry out the assault Shirt Choke (Giant Killer)
7. Trap and Roll Escape (5) Guillotine Choke
3. Reflexes: Instinctive and timely responses to all indicators. 1. Combat Base (3) Standard Variation
Base Get-up Punch Block Variation 13. Drag Defenses (3)
We assess reflexes by measuring the amount of time between indicator and response. Push Base Spread Hand Variation Wrist Drag
For example, if it takes you several seconds to decipher a wrist grab, you will receive a Pull Base Wrist-pin Variation Ankle Drag
1-point deduction for delayed reflexes. Hair Grab Variation Hair Drag
2. Wrist Releases (7)
Note: Add the Super Slap to all variations. 8. Elbow Escape (3) 14. Weapon Defenses (4)
4. Principles: Deep understanding of the core concepts. Standard Grip – 1 on 1 Standard Variation Straight Armlock (Gun)
Standard Grip – 2 on 1 Heel Drag Variation Kimura Armlock (Gun)
In the freestyle demonstrations, we will be assessing your knowledge of the core principles
Standard Grip – 2 on 2 Face Down Variation Straight Armlock (Knife)
of the Women Empowered program: boundary setting, distance management, false Inverted Grip – 1 on 1 Kimura Armlock (Knife)
surrenders, and energy efficiency. When a core principle is clearly omitted or incorrectly Inverted Grip – 2 on 1 9. Shrimp Escape (3)
applied, you will recieve a point deduction. Inverted Grip – 2 on 2 Block and Shoot 15. Rear Naked Choke (1)
Inverted Grip – Low Shrimp and Shoot Rear Naked Choke
Rider Variation
If you receive 10 deductions or less, (a final score of 90 points or higher) the evaluator 3. Front Choke Defenses (3) Standing Freestyle Demo: 2 minutes
will recommend you for promotion. If you score less than 90 points, we will return your test Standard Variation 10. Guard Get-up (9) For two minutes, you will be
with a description of each error so that you can use the feedback to grow and effectively Wall-pin Variation (Two-handed) Standard Variation required to demonstrate all standing
Wall-pin Variation (One-handed) False Surrender self-defense techniques at various
prepare to retest. Don’t give up if you fail the first time around. We are committed to helping intensity levels in response to your
you achieve your goal of total empowerment and want to ensure that you are fully Rider Variation
partner’s indicators.
4. Stop-Block-Frame (6) Heavy Chest Variation
prepared for any potential threats that may come your way. Once a Gracie University Distance Control Choke Variation Ground Freestyle Demo: 2 minutes
head instructor validates your test, and you are approved for promotion, you will receive a Block and Move Wrist-pin Variation For two minutes, you will be
graduation certificate and an official pink belt as a symbol of your successful completion Block and Frame Direct Get-up Variation required to demonstrate all ground
of the Women Empowered program. If your performance is exceptional, and you score a Punch Protection Knee Shield Variation self-defense techniques at various
Guillotine Choke (Standing) Power Frame intensity levels in response to your
95 or higher, you may qualify for the Women Empowered Instructor Certification Program Guillotine Choke (Guard Pull) partner’s indicators.
(ICP) should you choose to go down that path. We’ll discuss the ICP in more detail in Exhale, you’re done!
Section 5.

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 5
“ ”
S E C T I O N
Those who do.

Those who

teach.

– Aristotle
 THE EMPOWERMENT HANDBOOK B E YO N D T H E B E LT

T he pink belt marks the completion of the Women Empowered program. For some, this
is the end of the journey. For others, it’s just the beginning. Regardless of where you go
from here, you must remember that your new skills are perishable. In order to maintain your
Phase 4: Start Teaching!
If you pass the Live Evaluation, you’ll have the opportunity to begin teaching Women
Empowered in your community. If this happens, here are some of the benefits you
reflexes, plan to review all of the techniques at least once a month for the rest of your life! will enjoy:
The review should take no more than 10 -15 minutes, and if you ever need your skills in
self-defense, you’ll be glad you stayed committed. Regular review will also allow you to
Empowering your community. Learning self-defense helps us discover the
modify the techniques to accommodate your body as you get older. Now that you’ve
confidence we didn’t know we were missing. We believe that the world would
completed the program, if you’re eager for more, there are some exciting options for you
be a better place if every woman knew jiu-jitsu. By teaching self-defense and
to consider!
spreading the belief that we are all worth defending, you will be making an
invaluable contribution to your community.
BECOME AN INSTRUCTOR Mastering your self-defense mindset. When you teach once, you learn twice.
If you’ve fallen in love with the Women Empowered program, you may be interested in Every time you help a student learn a technique or understand a principle, your
becoming a certified instructor, so you can teach this program in your community. We knowledge of the material grows. By taking an active role as a self-defense
believe that Women Empowered needs to be made accessible to women all over the instructor, you are ensuring that your skillset will always be with you.
world, and the only way this is possible is to have highly-motivated program graduates
Profiting from your passion. Success is doing what you love and getting paid
willing to help us make it happen, and that means you! Here is what it takes to become
for it. Once you become a certified instructor, you will be authorized to teach the
a certified instructor of the Women Empowered program:
Women Empowered program in your community for profit, or as a donation-based
Phase 1: Score 95+ charitable service for your community. The choice is yours, and regardless of
The most dedicated students make the best instructors. If you score 95 or higher on your which path you choose, we’ll be there to support you.
pink belt test, you will be able to apply for the Instructor Certification Program (ICP). If you
fail to score a 95, you may retest once you’ve addressed the errors.
For more information on the ICP process, or to submit your application,
Phase 2: Complete the Online ICP
visit GracieUniveristy.com/WEICP
Once you pay the ICP tuition and pass the background check, you will be granted
access to a comprehensive online curriculum aimed at teaching you all the skills needed
to successfully administer and teach the Women Empowered program. Once you learn
all the material, you will upload a series of videos of you demonstrating the most important
teaching skills.

Phase 3: Live Evaluation

If you successfully complete the Online ICP, you will be invited to attend the Live Evaluation
at Gracie University Headquarters in Torrance, California. During this phase, your skills will
be evaluated in person by the Gracie family and the head instructors of Gracie University.

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Continue Your Gracie Jiu-Jitsu Journey
Regardless of whether or not you choose to pursue the path of instructorship, we
encourage you to continue the journey toward Gracie Jiu-Jitsu mastery. While the Women
Empowered program has provided you with the most important principles and techniques
for defense against sexual assault, there are hundreds of additional techniques that
are just as easy and effective as the ones you’ve already perfected, so why stop now?
HERE ARE SOME OF THE BENEFITS OF CONTINUING THE JOURNEY
Total Control
In the Women Empowered program, our objective was to help you find your physical
confidence and teach you how to break free from a sexual predator. Now that you’ve
perfected the critical neutralization and escape techniques, you are ready to take it
to the next level. By continuing to explore Gracie Jiu-Jitsu, you will learn hundreds of
additional techniques that will enable you to defend against a larger, stronger, more
athletic opponent.
Ultimate Fitness
There are few workouts more fun and engaging than Gracie Jiu-Jitsu. Not only do most of
the techniques incorporate all your major muscle groups, but you become so mentally
engaged in the training that you forget you’re working out! Whether you’re a fitness buff
who’s always looking for new and exciting workouts or you’re the kind of person who’s
trying to lose weight but can’t stand the thought of running on a treadmill for an hour,
Gracie Jiu-Jitsu is the perfect way to take your fitness to the next level!
Unprecedented Confidence
In the Women Empowered program, you learned a handful of essential techniques for
surviving against seemingly impossible odds. In the complete Gracie Jiu-Jitsu curriculum,
we will teach you several hundred techniques designed to overcome every imaginable
situation you would encounter in a physical altercation. By dedicating yourself to this
unique and powerful growth opportunity, your confidence will soar to new heights.
Comfort with Closeness
In a physical altercation, the most challenging feat is to remain calm when trapped
underneath the assailant. In the Women Empowered program, you developed comfort
with a certain level of closeness. By continuing your jiu-jitsu journey, you will learn that no
matter how hopeless a situation appears, there is always an opportunity for a technique
a be applied, and this conviction is as applicable in everyday life as it is in a fight.
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CONTINUE WITH GRACIE COMBATIVES
Once you’re ready to continue the journey, you will begin with a program called Gracie
Combatives. In this program, we will teach you the 36 most important and effective “street”
self-defense techniques of Gracie Jiu-Jitsu. In fact, many of the techniques that you
learned in the Women Empowered program also exist in the Gracie Combatives program.
We present each lesson using the exact same format you experienced in Women
Empowered. We start by presenting a series of simplified drills or “slices.” Once you perfect
the individual slices, we introduce you to a series of Reflex Development Drills that train
muscle memory and build your confidence. All techniques rely on the same principles
of leverage, timing, and energy efficiency that you’ve already learned to trust, and, we
cycle through the lessons in the same calm, controlled manner that you’ve become so
familiar with.
You can access the Gracie Combatives program online, on DVD, or at any of the Certified
Gracie Jiu-Jitsu Training Centers around the world. Once you perfect the 36 techniques,
you qualify to test for promotion to the Gracie Combatives (GC) belt. As a GC belt
holder, you enter the Master Cycle where you will learn the remaining 600+ techniques
of Gracie Jiu-Jitsu as you progress from blue to black belt!
TRY IT FOR FREE
To help you decide whether or not you want to continue on the path toward Gracie
Jiu-Jitsu mastery, we have made the first three lessons of the Gracie Combatives
program available for you to view, for free! Simply log on to www.GracieUniversity.com,
and you’ll have instant access. Lesson one is the Trap and Roll Escape that you’ve
already learned, but lessons two and three are totally new. Try the new lessons and
you’ll quickly realize that the program is easy, enjoyable, and exciting!
Gracie Jiu-Jitsu is a martial art that anyone can learn and provides benefits far beyond
self-defense. The journey is a long one, but it’s immensely rewarding. You owe it to yourself
to give it a shot – if you stop now, you’ll never know what you’re missing out on!
WE’LL SEE YOU ON THE MAT!
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SOURCES 18. Tjaden, Patricia and Thoennes, Nancy. November 1998. Prevalence, Incidence and Consequences of Violence
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