~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The
Black Book
for
Social Butterflies
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Copyright © 2012 Ervin Tan

A Brief Understanding of Social Butterflies

The booming bass sets the mood as disco lights flood the room. People start to get down
on the floor. The crowd starts to dance wildly to the beat of the music. Arms shoot up.
People start jumping like mad rabbits on the loose. These guys really have stamina.
The disc jockey had just finished playing a 160BPM techno tune and these guys
took virtually no time to recover their energy.

I try to join in, but I’m not in the mood to give myself away. I spy with my little eye a girl
waving her arms madly in the air. I observe her while trying to concentrate on my dance.
I’m not very good at night clubs. I can shuffle, but not very well. I try to jump a bit,
but it’s so crowded I feel more a bug than a soul born to dance.

After the music finally fades away and people stop taking their feet off the ground,
I recollect my thoughts and proceed to approach the girl. I see her talking to a few
friends of hers, but to me, it doesn’t matter. It would’ve mattered if I was facing a
Modern Woman. But I wasn’t. I knew exactly who I was coming up against. And I knew
exactly how to make an impression she’ll probably remember for the rest of her life.

I approach her and touch her on her shoulder. Instantly, she turns around.

“Hey. You looked cool just now when you were dancing.
You a regular here or something?”

She started smiling. “Yeah,” then adding with a sly smile, “but I can tell you aren’t.”

“Yeah. So anyway, my name’s Ervin. What do you call yourself?”

She grins. “I don’t call myself names, but my friends know me as Charlene.” She looks
at me. “So, are you going to be like all the other guys and buy me a drink?”

I look back at her, making sure I look deep into her eyes. I step closer to her as I speak.
“Nope. I’m gonna buy you peanuts. You okay with that?”

She’s taken aback, but only a little. She composes herself quickly. Chuckling nervously,
she says, “Everyone knows that peanuts are on the house.”

“Nope. They’re in the house. Or rather, here in this club.”

I add, “You don’t have to be nervous. It’s cute.”

“You sound like a character with bad lines from a film.”

“Exactly. You’re totally hitting on the wrong guy. I’m not boyfriend material. That guy’s
better.” I point to a bespectacled guy sitting alone nearby.

“Wow. You were the one who talked to me first.”

“Ah, I see. So you’re playing hard-to-get. I should’ve known.” I slap my forehead
animatedly. I suddenly move my head towards hers, my eyes staring into hers. She
doesn’t budge. I’ve done it!

“But you know I’m much better at it than you.”

She blinks once. Then she blinks twice and smiles somewhat knowingly. “Not bad.
But you still sound like bad lines.”

I cock my head to one side. I make sure to blink slowly, very slowly. Then I speak.

“Well, bad lines don’t necessarily mean bad sex.”

I flash her a sly smile. Her lips are almost touching mine. Suddenly, I remember.
I wasn’t here to seduce every single girl. I wasn’t here for one-night stands.

I was just here to observe a wonderful creature in its natural habitat.

A Social Butterfly in a night club.

I pull myself away from her, turning to face her friends but making sure my eyes stay
staring into hers for three long seconds before prying them away. All this while,
her friends had been dead silent and watching us both. I smile at each one of them.
Every one of them gave me the same response: a shy smile. Mission accomplished.

I glance at my watch. “Well, looks like it’s time I headed home.” I looked at Charlene.
“You really are a talented dancer.” And with those words, I turned my back and
walked away, once again making sure my eyes stay staring into hers for
three long seconds before prying them away. I do not look back and walk
straight out of the door.

Once the door is closed, I heave a sigh of relief. I did it.

I captured the heart of a Social Butterfly.