1

Writing Business Messages

Name

Course

Institution

Date
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Option 2

AIM Analysis and persuasive message

Purpose

1. To convince freshman about the benefits of joining student organization

Audience

1. The primary audience of my message are freshman students, while secondary audience

are continuing students who are not members of any student organization.

2. Upon reading my message, I want my audience to joint student organizations.

3. I will build my credibility by highlighting personal benefits of being a member of a

student organization

Information

1. The questions I anticipate from my audience include the types of student organizations

available in campus, the procedure for joining the, and the benefits of being a member.

2. The background information I will need include membership details from student

organizations and the benefits they provide to their members.

3. The benefits that I will highlight include networking, fun, and better grades skills.

Message

Primary message

1. It is beneficial to join a student organization

Point 1: Better grades

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a. Gain time management skills

b. Raise your GPA by working more hours

c. Create balance between school and involvement with the organization

Point 2: Students benefit from networking

a. Network with professionals in relevant fields.

b. Access to student alumni.

c. Networking helps in the attainment of personal goals.

Point 3: Access to fun activities

a. Opportunity to make friends

b. Students get to do something they love

c. Motivating experience by helping host events.

Call to action: interested in joining a student organization? Contact us!

Memo

To: Freshman Students

From: President of University Students Organization

Date:

Subject: benefit of joining a student organization

College students are busy juggling classes, homework, work, and other commitments; therefore,

there is a lot to balance. So why would a student add another commitment by joining a student
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organization? The main reason is the positive impact it can have on careers and campus

experience. One benefit of joining a student organization is better grades due to improved time

management skills.

The additional projects and activities afforded by student organizations enable members to learn

effective tie management skills. Joining a student organization also provides great networking

opportunities, which are necessary in the modern world. Student alumni groups work with

campus students through organizations. Finally, student organizations offer endless fun activities

that make campus life a memorable experience. Therefore, join now to reap these benefits.

Kind Regards,

Routines Message

Aim Analysis

Purpose

1. To request the purchase of new Apple MacBook Pros for regional sales managers.

Audience

1. Head of purchasing, Abbot Laboratories

Information

1. The questions I would expect from my audiences include the benefits of the computers to

the business and the cost.

2. Providing research on the benefits of information technology equipment.

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Message

Primary message: Buying new MacBook Pro computers for regional sales managers will

improve business operations

Point1: Remote accessibility

a. Access to the company’s network.

b. Work from any location.

c. Enhances their mobility.

Point2: Business communication

a. Secure sending and receipt of business files.

b. Remote access to the internet

c. Communication with other business executives

Point3: Information technology tools for business

a. Project management tools.

b. File sharing and editing tools.

c. Spreadsheets and Word Docs.

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Business email

To: Sondra Simms, Head of Purchasing

CC: Chief Operations Officer, Chief Finance Officer.

From: Austin Regional Manager

Subject: Request for purchase of new MacBook Pros for regional sales managers

Dear Sondra,

I am writing to request for the purchases of new MacBook Pros computers for the regional

managers to enhances their work. Considering that they work from remote locations, the

computers will enable them to perform their duties effectively. The other benefits that will be

derived from the purchase is improved business communication. The computers will allow them

to access the company’s network securely because the computers will be for official use only.

Furthermore, they will be able to work while on the move.

Finally, the managers will access various business tools such as project management tools, file

sharing and editing tools, and spreadsheets. These tools are vital in the current business

environment and increase productivity. Hopefully, the company will consider this request,

which has implications for its performance.

Yours Sincerely,

Austin Regional Manager

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Reference

Garner, B. (2013). HBR Guide to Better Business Writing (HBR Guide Series): Engage Readers,

Tighten and Brighten, Make Your Case. Boston: Harvard Business Review Press.