EMAIL ETIQUETTE

Please assess the following emails I received. What is good about them? How
could they have been written better? Kindly write your improved versions
underneath each.

1.
Dear Sir,
 
I hope you are well.
 
I am sending my assignment to you via email as my browser got stuck and did not
upload the attachment on time and by the time it reloaded the assignment tab had
been closed.
I hope you excuse this as the circumstances were beyond my control and accept my
assignment.
 
Thanking you in advance

2.
This email sent to multiple faculty members as well as to program staff:

Dear All,

I hope you are doing well. Dr.Samia's session today regarding COVID 19 was highly
insightful. However, the revelation of a Corona patient from my batch has been
rather alarming for me. I am well aware that LUMS has taken all the necessary steps
to quarantine students who were in direct contact with COVID 19 patients. However,
there are a few students who were in contact with those who have currently been
quarantined, who will be taking classes with me tomorrow and on Thursday.

Keeping in mind my own safety and the safety of my family members, I humbly
request that the program office and all my instructors, allow me to take my classes
online for this week only, so that I am at peace that by next week the chance of
COVID 19 exposure will be minimized.

I would resume my on campus classess on my designated days I.e Wednesdays and

Thursdays from next week that is from 17th February.

Thankyou for all your help, guidance and corporation.

3.
Aoa,
 
Hope you are doing well. I am feeling a little down so I am taking the class online
from hostel. Hope that is okay.
 
Regards,
 

4.
Respected sir,
I am going away this weekend to swat with family. I will be there the whole weekend
and won't get any time to make the presentation or work on it. Please ,taking this
situation under consideration, can you delay my presentation till Wednesday from
monday. It would really help take my stress off because the fear of failing it is really
making me anxious.sir please help me in this regard.

5.
Dear Sir,

This email is with regards to the announcement you just posted of the assignment. I
wanted to kindly ask for a small extension of the deadline. I am just about to leave
campus and go up north for the weekend, from where I will return Sunday 1/2am. I
will not be having any signals or so or even my laptop (things are packed and have
been sent) so please let me know what I can do. I really do not want to miss my
assignment and if the assignment was sent today morning then I could’ve been able
to complete it but now I will not be able to (as this trip was paid for 2 weeks ago).
Please do give me any alternative, even a short deadline extension of 6 hours would
do. 

Please let me know what can be done as soon as possible (as I won’t have signals this
weekend and hence no 3G or WiFi).

Thanks,
6.
Dear sir,

I hope this email finds you well.

In accordance with the groups that were made on Thursday (consequently updated
on Google drive sheet by TA), we as a 5-membered group already prepared for our
project/ role play.

Dividing our group into two groups just 4 days before the project, would require us
(the separated group) to begin work from scratch, which in my opinion is unfair. We
may be allowed to present our role play as a 5-membered group please.

We all shall be indebted to you!

7.
Hi Sir, 

I wanted to ask you the weightage of our last assignment (statement of purpose). I
have checked the course outline yet assignments are combined. I unfortunately
missed the deadline and just want to know where I stand.

Thanks,

8.
Respected Sir, 

Hope you're doing well. I feel very sick due to which I haven't been able to make the
slides and I don't think I'll be able to make it to class tomorrow. I just wanted to
confirm if the attendance for tomorrow will be marked and if the presentations
would be graded. 

Looking forward to your response. 

9.
Dear Sir

I am interested in meeting the guest speakers from Siemens and discuss about SAP
since I happen to have done my principles of management group project on SAP
implementation itself. Kindly accomadate me.

Best regards

10.
Hey!

I would like to meet you on Thursday regarding my presentation! Please tell me what
time should i visit.

Thank you

11.

https://pern-
my.sharepoint.com/:w:/g/personal/20100281_lums_edu_pk/EfzRO_xGxUFNlO_i8hI18K
wBzWvC3RRcY0FNlY_X2mGo7w?e=t67v

12.
<blank email with an attachment>

13.
Dear Sir,

Hope this email finds you in good health. I just saw the record for the business
communication class on the google sheet and i would like to point out that there has
been a violation of the contractual obligations that we as two parties agreed to at
the very start of the class.

To even further strengthen the contract, once the online classes started you
"explicitly" messaged us on whatsapp that there will be no changes in the weightage
of the assessment components that were agreed upon in the start of the class. This
means that any policy that was agreed upon at the beginning of the semester was
still intact even after the lock down. Were you going to change anything, you were
obligated to "explicitly" inform us, which sadly you did not. 
According to the course outline provided to us at the start of the semester there
were 4 allowed absences, however there was no explicit mention of how these
absences were to be distributed.  Any person could have used these allowed
absences as he or she willed under any distribution. Since i had the RIGHT to make
use of these 4 absences, i did use them before the midterm because of valid reasons.
And now lowering down the allowed absences to 2 is a clear violation of the
agreement. With all due respect, sadly this is also against the concept of integrity
which you have been trying to teach us. 

Now you may argue that you had to do this because of the online classes and there
weren't the full number of sessions held physically . But you have to realize that the
spread of this pandemic was not in our control as much as it wasn't in yours. But
what was in your and our control was to abide by the original contract that you
explicitly said will be followed to the dot, which is now being violated.

I hope you will look into the matter sincerely.

14.
……Secondly, Sir, being the first group to present on Tuesday, we are disadvantaged.
We have several tasks to handle on the same deadline /day. We have a project
submission, presentation to prepare and deliver, and Mid-term submission, all
due on Tuesday. 

Considering the huge workload, we feel that it is a little unfair to us, as we deserve
more time. Hence, we humbly request you at least extend the
Midterm deadline for our group. So we can perform to the best of our abilities.

We are hoping for your positive response.

Thank you!

Some good emails

1.
Respected Sir, 

I hope this email finds you well. I am writing because I got this course after your
second lecture on Wednesday the 4th of September and I do not wish to miss out on
any thing that you might have gone over in the first two classes. I will be grateful to
you if you could guide me as to what I should do to catch up with the class. 

Thank you.

2.
Received after TA sent a warning about not being prepared for the guest speaker
session on Tableau.

Respected Sir,

I was aware of the importance of the session and sincerely appreciate your efforts to
make us ready to cope up with difficulties that we are facing or going to face in the
corporate sector. Arranging such a crucial and pragmatic session just for us shows
your sincerity towards us, and doing so, definitely, you demand some level of
seriousness from our side. It was totally my fault that i was unable to grasp the
maximum benefit from this opportunity and missed the session just because I did
not follow the instructions and dressed informally in the session. I sincerely apologize
for not being formally dressed in today’s Guest Speaker Session and for not falling
on your expectations. It is important for me not to let someone down if he is
devotedly doing something better for me and expecting something from me.
Therefore, I assure you that you will not notice any kind of carelessness and
irresponsibility from my side again.

I humbly ask your forgiveness. I hope that my mistake will not prevent you from
helping us in the future.