Maturity?

When I was still a kid, people around me would often say that maturity, specifically
mental maturity comes with a person’s age; the older you are, the more mature you are. I was
clueless about the concept of being mentally matured until a year ago, during the COVID-19
global pandemic.
Year 2020 might be the worst year for most people for the reason that the whole world
had suffered from a virus outbreak – COVID 19. The pandemic is still experienced but since
vaccines have been created, the world had saw a light of hope. Despite those events, I consider
2020 as the best year for my self-development. I have learned so much things about family, me
and especially about life. It was the time of COVID-19 outbreak here in our province and our
city. Although we had sufficient financial capability, my parents are struggling to do household
chores and were afraid since they are beyond 50 years of age which makes them vulnerable to
the virus. The thought of being COVID-19 positive and eventually dying crossed their mind
which saddened them. It broke my heart. As I reminisce my actions in the past, I realized that I
am nothing but a failure. I was so lazy to the point that my 55-year-old mother and father had to
do most of the household chores all this time. How ironic it is not wanting for my parents to die
before I make them proud but at the same time not doing any possible action to make their lives
comfortable. I secretly cried and started to blame myself for every stupid action I made. I always
knew that my parents do chores and house responsibilities but this time hit me different. I
imagined a scenario where they are no longer beside us, I realized that it is me who would be in
pain in the end because of the regrets that I could not make them happy at all. My conscience
kept me up late at night, asking questions like “what if they die tomorrow?” How am I supposed
to continue on living if I have no reason to go on anymore? If it wasn’t for this pandemic, I do not
know how much longer would I stay being a senseless, arrogant, and good-for-nothing son. I
used to disrespect my parents whenever they scold me for the bad things I do, but now I try my
best to not make them upset because they are currently suffering from high blood pressure
which can be triggered and immediately be severe anytime. I had so much regrets, I wish that I
had appreciated them and their actions long time ago.
Maybe, for most people, age defines how matured an individual thinks and acts. I totally
disagree with that. I’m 17 and just took one step towards maturity. For me, situation changes
people. Depending on the situation you are in, your actions and personality adapts.