Parent-Child Relationship – Why it’s Important

Parenting is the most fulfilling job that we will ever have, but it’s not without it’s challenges. Modern family
life can be stressful and with various pressures on families it’s not always easy. Ultimately, parents want
what is best for their child and a strong parent-child relationship can help lead to better outcomes for
children.
Why is a Positive Parent-Child Relationship Important? 
The Parent-Child Relationship is one that nurtures the physical, emotional and social development of the
child. It is a unique bond that every child and parent will can enjoy and nurture. This relationship lays the
foundation for the child’s personality, life choices and overall behaviour. It can also affect the strength of
their social, physical, mental and emotional health. 

Some of the benefits include:

 Young children who grow with a secure and healthy attachment to their parents stand a better chance
of developing happy and content relationships with others in their life.
 A child who has a secure relationship with parent learns to regulate emotions under stress and in
difficult situations.
 Promotes the child’s mental, linguistic and emotional development.
 Helps the child exhibit optimistic and confident social behaviours.
 Healthy parent involvement and intervention in the child’s day-to-day life lay the foundation for
better social and academic skills.
 A secure attachment leads to a healthy social, emotional, cognitive, and motivational
development. Children also gain strong problem-solving skills when they have a positive relationship with
their parents.

Parenting Style – Positive Parenting

There is “one-size fits all” when it comes to parenting, we change and adapt as our children grow. However,
following some simple positive parenting tips can help when it comes to your relationship with your child.

Warm, loving interactions

Treat every interaction as an opportunity to connect with your child. Be a warm in your expressions, give eye
connect, smile and encourage interaction. 

Have boundaries, rules & consequences

Children need structure and guidance. Talk to your children about what you expect of them and make sure
they understand. 

Listen and empathise with your child

Acknowledge your child’s feelings, show them you understand, and reassure that you are there to help them
whenever they have problems.

Problem Solving
Help your child to problem solve. Be a good role model and show them how to behave through your own
actions. When you work with your children to find solutions they learn how to deal with difficulties in a
appropriate way.

Strengthening the Parent-Child Relationship

Forming a connection with your child is important to developing a strong parent-child relationship. Here are
some tips to help with strengthening your relationship with your children.

Tell your child you love them

Of course you love your children but tell them every day, no matter what age they are. Even on difficult days
let your child know you didn’t like the behaviour but you love them unconditionally. A simple “I love you”
can do a lot to strengthen a relationship.
Play together
Play is so important to children’s development. Young children can develop many skills through the power
of play. As well as it being fun and helping you develop your relationship with your child, it can help
children’s language skills, emotions, creativity and social skills. 

Be Available
Make time to talk to your child without any distractions, even 10 minutes a day can make a big difference in
establishing good communication habits. Turn off the TV, put away technology and spend some quality time
together.

Eat meals together

Eating together as a family sets the stage for conversation. Encourage no technology at the table and enjoy
each other’s company.

Listen and empathise

Connection starts with listening. Try and see things from your child’s perspective and foster mutual respect.

Spend one on one time with children

If you have more than one child try and make a point of spending individual time with each of them. Quality,
individual time with your child can strengthen your bond, builds their self-esteem and lets them know they
are valued.

“Conflict is a situation when we know ourselves, how important our desires and needs are, which we declare
or keep silent about. We also get to know our partner and see what is important to him. And when the
conflict is resolved, we will be able to use all the information, if desired, in our further communication, ”says
Tetyana.

1. "Listen to yourself and the other side, find what they have in common, what you can build a solution to the
conflict."

2. Conclude a so-called "internal contract" - I know what is good for me and what is bad, what principles are
inviolable, and what things I can agree to under certain conditions. Is the principle I insist on giving me
really important? By asking ourselves these questions, we will learn to better understand ourselves and avoid
unnecessary misunderstandings.

3. It is worth talking and even sometimes prescribing rules in families. Especially if the couple has different
traditions, interests, views. Conflicts are more common in such families.

4. If parents have a dispute, the best example for a child is to lead it as an argument for their positions, says
Dima Zitzer. Conflict should not be avoided. After all, at this point we learn to discuss various topics and
show children how to find the right words, how to deal with their own energy or aggression.

5. It is necessary to agree that everyone has the right to himself, to the shelter, which is a home. So it's
perfectly normal to say to someone in your family, "I'm sorry, I need time now; I want to drown in Facebook
or take a bath… ”.

6. It would be good if each of us knew our own buttons. For example, to calm down, I need to wash my
hands, drink water, take a walk in the fresh air, or call a friend. It is important to remember this button as you
step into the outbreak of an argument or conflict.

7. If you want to stop being angry once and for all - "bring" your evil facial expression to the mirror and look
at your reflection. Then you will not want to communicate with close people with such grimaces "

CONFLICTS IN THE FAMILY AND CHILDREN

Children should not be involved in adult conflict. However, it is difficult to avoid quarrels in families in
which children become witnesses or participants.

Recommendations:

1. It is necessary to translate the situation into a plane of constructive conflict, advises Tatiana Romanova.
"It's not just about shouting, it's about solving the problem. Do not involve children. Don't make a choice -
are you for me or for him? Don't look for an ally in a child. ”

2. Children emotionally scan the situation in the family. When the parents deny the child a conflict in the
family, she does not understand what is happening: the mother is crying - it means that something happened,
but she answers that everything is fine. The child does not understand who to trust: himself - because he feels
that something is wrong, or his mother - who says that everything is fine.

It is better to say: “I have a conflict with my dad, but this is our conflict. We are trying to solve it, we are
doing everything for that. "

3. “If you quarrel in front of children, the best thing you can do is put up with them. You will show that after
a quarrel you can put up with, you can apologize, ”says Tetyana.

4. If there is a quarrel in front of the child, it would be right to distract him and say: "Don't worry, it does not
mean that we hate each other, we do not agree with something, we need to discuss it."

According to Dima Zitzer, first of all, at this moment we are switching, and this is a certain hygiene. Second,
we give a message to the child that it is important. After all, parents often behave as if the child does not hear
or see anything. And, thirdly, it is a reminder to ourselves that we now have a third person we love, who has
their own emotions and feelings - and they must be respected.

5. “We are a family, we are close, we have the right to argue, disagree, conflict in front of the child. But at
this point, remember that the model is being laid. If dad calls mom or dad a bad word - it is fixed forever, "-
says Dima Zitzer.

6. Parents are often too tempted to conflict with their children. After all, she is weaker, she has to listen to
me, if not - I can press.

“Unfortunately, we were taught to win. At any cost. At this point, victory over the other person gives ugly
emotions. To get out of this maze, you have to help each other. ” That's why Dima Zitzer advises to
remember the principle - we must protect children from ourselves.